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Introduction Hello there! I was born just a bit early on September 28, 2007. My moms doctor said that it was on account of the harvest moon that was up at the time, and that the hospital staffs more nurses during full moons because of all the early births. I live in Southern California in a pleasant little village known as Whittier with my mom Rose, who is also a nurse, and my dad Sacha, who farts alot. We also have a cat named Footfoot but I don't see her much because she's shit scared of me. Things I like: Warm milk from my mommas soft and silky ta-tas, The Kinks, Bach and Astrud Gilberto, when people pick me up, rides in my pram, days when my Gradmas take care of me, belching, grunting, peeing when my diaper's off. Things I don't like: The slightly cooler than room temperature stale milk my pops tries to feed me outta those nasty plastic boobs, when my left finger gouges at my eye socket, when people put me down, when people take my clothes on and off dozens of times in a day like I'm the f**king host at the Oscars or something, taking baths;baby products smell like shit I'll stick with the funny cheese smell thank-you-very-much,