The Neurotic Monkey

My blogs

About me

Gender MALE
Industry Non-Profit
Occupation Mankind's Last Hope
Location Loserville, United States
Introduction The Only Known Natural Predator of the Panda. Also, tastes a lot like Butterscotch.
Interests Clubbing Baby Seals, Humping the Elderly and/or Infirmed, Laughing at the Mentally Deranged, Smearing Pudding on a Baby's Face, Knitting, y'know...Kids' Stuff
Favorite Movies Fight Club, Jaws, Chasing Amy, Cool Hand Luke, High Fidelity, Adaptation, Annie Hall, The Royal Tenenbaums, The Goonies, Evil Dead 2, Donnie Darko, Dead Alive, Ghostbusters, The Graduate, Wet Hot American Summer, Three Kings, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Kill Bill I & II, Trouble in Paradise, Bubba Ho-Tep, The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou, Freaks, Bring me the Head of Alfredo Garcia, Happiness of the Katakuris, Kiss Kiss Bang Bang
Favorite Music The Flaming Lips, The Velvet Underground, Phish, Nine Inch Nails, Black Rebel Motorcycle Club, Will Oldham (in all of his guises), mc chris, Radiohead, Godspeed You! Black Emperor, Johnny Cash, Deltron 3030, The Postal Service, TV on the Radio, The Secret Machines, The Arcade Fire, !!!, The GO! Team, Ratatat, Sufjan Stevens, MF Doom, David Bowie, Clem Snide, Olivia Tremor Control, Pavement, They Might Be Giants, Journey, The Beach Boys
Favorite Books Jitterbug Perfume by Tom Robbins, Breakfast of Champions by Kurt Vonnegut, Love in the Time of Cholera by Gabriel Garcia Marquez, Infinite Jest by David Foster Wallace, A Portrait of the Artist as a Young Man by James Joyce, A Confederacy of Dunces by John Kennedy Toole, Good Omens by Neil Gaiman & Terry Pratchett, The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen, Lamb by Christopher Moore, The Gay Science by Nietzsche, Choke by Chuck Palahniuk, Men & Cartoons by Jonathan Lethem, Notes of a Dirty Old Man by Bukowski, Thief of Always by Clive Barker, Hocus Pocus by Kurt Vonnegut Jr

What spells can you cast with magic markers?

I can write "Dick-Cheese" on your chin while you're passed out. It might not sound magical, but it is.