Franswirth McClane
| Gender | Male |
|---|---|
| Industry | Chemicals |
| Occupation | Alcoholic |
| Location | Down the shore, Jersey, United States |
| Links | Audio Clip |
| Introduction | Cats, fighter jets, and bacon. |
| Interests | Books, Booze, Your Books, Your Booze, Fantasy Sports, Gaming, Football, Cryptoquotes, Scary Spice, Various Peoples' Moms |
| Favorite movies | Forrest Gump, Pulp Fiction, Fight Club, Slingblade, Taxi Driver, Shawshank Redemption, Green Mile, Nell |
| Favorite music | Everything but death metal. |
| Favorite books | Kurt Vonnegut, Chuck Palahniuk, 1984, Brave New World, Catch-22, Grapes of Wrath, The Trial, Crime and Punishment, Lord of the Flies, The Contortionist's Handbook, House of Leaves, Tom Clancy, The Innocent Man |
For your birthday, your aunt gave you a maple syrup dispenser shaped like a rooster. Please write her a thank-you note:
Dear Aunt Jemima, Thanks for the cock.