|Location||Bay Ridge, Brooklyn, United States|
|Links||Audio Clip, Wishlist|
|Introduction||Due to an unexpected explosion near my home planet , I was forced to leave and take up residence on Earth. My ship crash landed of course, into a briar patch and that is why I hate all forms of cheese. My childhood was like most; with the all the ecoutrement... save food and clothing. My adoptive parents loved Me as much as they could however, as I was not fruit of their looms, they certainly didn't. I spent many an afternoon wishing I had legs and soon found I indeed had legs, but was led to believe I did not. I often speak of myself in the third person. He describes himself as a "genius savant with savoir faire and matching laissez faire underpants". During my early teens he fantasized about cotton candy framing paper cuts. I often found himself alone and aroused. He abused himself often and grew a goatee on his left hand. "I have an Incessant Penchant for Golden Crust Patties and Banana Chicken from "Ollies Noodle Shop" (44th street in times square)."You know say Daddy Me Snow me-a (gonna) blame A licky boom-boom down 'Tective man he say, say Daddy Me Snow Me stab someone down the lane A licky boom-boom down"|
|Interests||Murder, Girls Gone Wild, Play acting in the subway, Grating Cheese, Apple Computers, Crushing garlic, Degrassi Jr High|
|Favorite Movies||Fantasy Island, Blue Velvet|
|Favorite Music||Jo Serrapere, Modern Lovers, William Shatner, Caetano Veloso, The Arm, Mike Doughty, Wesley Eure, Snow, Zebrahead, deadly Snakes, Bowling For Soup, Creedence, Stan Freburg|
|Favorite Books||Lectures on the Icosahedron (Dover Phoenix Editions) by Felix Klein, T. CORAGHESSAN BOYLE-MODERN LOVE, Milton-Paradise Lost|
Which do you prefer and why: whittling with soap or whistling with wood?
It's a rotten thing to have a soapy neck. It gives you a disgusting sticky feeling.