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Wow. I actually........liked it.

I purposely avoided reading any reviews and I really didn't even know much about the plot other than Megan Fox was going to kill some people - I didn't even see the trailer. So I went in with zero expectations - but mildly excited that I was going to see a horror film at the movies in October that wasn't a remake and wasn't Saw Part-whatever-they're-on-now.

I thought it was a fun movie and there were some parts that were genuinely creepy. I think it could have been more disturbing with just a little more gore. I'm kind of surprised the film was rated R - maybe I'm jaded but it seemed like we could have pushed the envelope a little more.
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I also enjoyed Amanda Seyfried as 'Needy' - she does a great job on Big Love and I thought she was great in this. Megan Fox - ah well, I suppose she just does what Megan Fox does - I've never seen her before in anything, and I'm sure she's not sweating that, since I'm not really her target audience. Also a nice touch were the additions of Amy Sedaris, JK Simmons - LOVED the cameo by Lance Henriksen.

I think it's really too bad that a R -rated horror movie that wasn't a sequel or a remake did so poorly at the box office - and no matter if you liked the movie or not - you'd still have to admit that it's still better than at least 75% of the horror movies to play in theaters in the last year. And now Saw -Whatever will come out and probably make enough to justify ANOTHER one.

I do have one bone to pick with this film, and it's with the dialogue. How is it that EVERYONE in this film speaks using hip shorthand and clever phrasing? It would have gotten old if it had just been Megan Fox's character - but it's all the teens - and not only them, it's the little kids and the parents too, FOR CRYING OUT LOUD. Some of my most unfavorites included:

-"You're just jello (meaning jealous). You're lime green jello and you don't even know it."

-'Do you have a tampon? I thought you might - you seemed like you were plugging.'

-a character's little sister using the phrase 'penis cheese'

-a character's mother refering to Jesus as 'J.C.'

- and my absolute favorite - a burly police cadet announcing he'll soon be 'on the squad for reals'! FOR REALS????

And that's only the BEGINNING. If you made a drinking game based on every time someone used this kind of 'cute-speak' or whatever you want to call it, you'd never remember the end of the film. Because you'd have FREAKING ALCOHOL POISONING. I don't really have an issue with any of the above phrases (expect maybe the plugging one - especially coming from another woman - which makes it even more insulting) but when Every. Single. Character's. Dialogue seems like they're trying to prove how hip and cool they are - well, you get the picture.

But that's really my only gripe - and my one complaint about Juno as well. Other than that, I like the stories that Diablo Cody is telling - I just hope the next time she writes a script that the dialogue gets a little dialed in.


For reals,
Mother Firefly