You've put my life into words. I think it's always a struggle to expect great things from God when you've been disappointed. I don't know the answer, but you're in good company.
Deb - I think you are amazing:) I pray that God answers your "why's", but until that happens, please remember you are loved by many. I think you are "a catch" as my mother would say. Don't give up. God is in the habit of making things beautiful in his time and he has a plan. Love ya
Whys are so hard. Not just dealing with little ones why, but dealing with our own. We have this need to know all the reasons for things God does or doesn't do in our life. It's obviously a fleshly thing, we see it manifested in children. My pastor always says there are three things you never have to teach a child: no, mine, and why!
Keep going, you are doing so great with those little ones. And you are pretty great yourself.
January 08, 2012 5:31 PM
Anonymous said...
Hahah I was gonna write some "working with special kids expert (heehee on the expert)" advice about the why's and how to save some sanity, but then I kept reading and decided this is my favorite blog of yours yet. My own "why's" are what is keeping me from being OK with God...I"m at the point I don't even care the answer...I don't care if GOd said "K8,your husband fell for your close friend because dot dot dot" I don't care if the answer is God was bored and needed to see her and I spar in a boxing match (yup it happened) for some reason, just like your little ones the answer makes all the difference....and the kicker is we don't know why : ) Hang in there super momma (and no arguing on the super part cuz I will win :)
January 08, 2012 7:57 PM
We are in the thick of the why's over here. It is driving me nuts. I mean, it can be the most basic and obvious thing that starts the "why" and then it can go on forever. Not.even.kidding. It is exhausting and the truth is, many times there is no good answer. Picture this:
No, you may not have more yogurt.
Why?
Because you just had one.
Why?
Because you were hungry.
Why?
Because you skipped lunch.
Why?
Because you were tired.
Why?
Because it was nap time.
Why?
Because we sleep in the afternoon.
Why?
Because I said so.
Why?
Because I'm the mom.
Why?
Because God made me the mom.
Why?
Because He is the boss and He's brilliant.
Why? *insert head exploding*
We aren't doing why's any more.
Why???
Do you feel my pain? I'm ready for this stage to be over!
And then I think about my faith walk. I "why" the Creator of the Universe all.the.time.
Why do young husbands and fathers die?
Why can't I have the job I want? Why can't I have it NOW?
Why does Seth have to have issues?Why haven't you completely healed him? Why is his teacher so angry about it?
Why am I still single? Why did the hopeful relationship fail, again?Why hasn't anyone chosen ME?
Why won't my house sell? Why won't they drop their price on the one I want? Why do I keep losing great houses to timing?
Why are people mean?
Why am I lonely?
Why are children starving and why can't I "really" help?
Why won't my brother believe?
Why???
Wah.
I'm exhausted just thinking about how God must feel. But I must also confess that after 41 (gulp) years of unanswered Why's, my expectations have changed. While I hope to sell my house, a huge part of me wonders if it will really happen. While I'd love to get married, I've pretty much written that one off. A new job sounds great but again, my expectations are low. I'm guarded. That's the bottom line.
But that's not scriptural, is it? What does God say about guarding our hopes, prayers, desires, needs, wants?
"Ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you." Matthew 7:7
"Now to him who is able to do far more abundantly than all that we ask or think, according to the power at work within us...." Ephesians 3:20 [More than I ask or even think???? Wow....]
"And whatever things you ask in prayer, believing, you will receive." Matthew 21:22 [There's the rub...]
No. Instead of being guarded, I should be crying out to God. I should be expecting exceedingly more than I could even imagine. I should ask. I should pray to receive. But the fear of (another) disappointment haunts me. And so I pray, "Lord, I believe. Help me in my unbelief." And then I remember all of the other times He has been faithful. Joshua 4:1-20 Because, He has.
4 Comments
Close this window Jump to comment formYou've put my life into words. I think it's always a struggle to expect great things from God when you've been disappointed. I don't know the answer, but you're in good company.
January 07, 2012 7:59 PM
Deb - I think you are amazing:) I pray that God answers your "why's", but until that happens, please remember you are loved by many. I think you are "a catch" as my mother would say. Don't give up. God is in the habit of making things beautiful in his time and he has a plan. Love ya
January 08, 2012 4:07 PM
Whys are so hard. Not just dealing with little ones why, but dealing with our own. We have this need to know all the reasons for things God does or doesn't do in our life. It's obviously a fleshly thing, we see it manifested in children. My pastor always says there are three things you never have to teach a child: no, mine, and why!
Keep going, you are doing so great with those little ones. And you are pretty great yourself.
January 08, 2012 5:31 PM
Hahah I was gonna write some "working with special kids expert (heehee on the expert)" advice about the why's and how to save some sanity, but then I kept reading and decided this is my favorite blog of yours yet. My own "why's" are what is keeping me from being OK with God...I"m at the point I don't even care the answer...I don't care if GOd said "K8,your husband fell for your close friend because dot dot dot" I don't care if the answer is God was bored and needed to see her and I spar in a boxing match (yup it happened) for some reason, just like your little ones the answer makes all the difference....and the kicker is we don't know why : ) Hang in there super momma (and no arguing on the super part cuz I will win :)
January 08, 2012 7:57 PM