I enjoyed this poem and its message despite a few oddities forced by vocab (eg, thin clothes). I agree with you that some would find this earth connection a preparation for Zen.
You are really good at this getting a buncha words and making a poem. That all fitted nicely. Well done. Got your note, truly happy that M was happy and delighted. Aren't surprises fun lol
Opening the land of milk and honey there is promise in that..working the land fighting natural elements..storing tears..I think you have woven a story many can relate to.
[Image]
Row after row,
turning, plowing, and planting
growing, cutting and harvesting
opening the land
of milk and honey
We tire of battling
the elements dressed
in thin simple clothes
but we store our tears
until darkness falls
The dinner bell rings
calling us home
in level tones
grateful for freedom
we speak Latin no more
Without intending this became a double prompt for Sunday's Whirligig and Flash 55 Plus at Imaginary Garden With Real Toads. I used the words with the picture for inspiration while finishing with 55 words exactly. I forgot the touch of Zen but some reach that moment working with the land.
27 Comments
Close this window Jump to comment formi think you did very well!
May 2, 2015 at 7:31 PM
This is so heart-warming..! Loved the beautiful depiction of life on farm!
xoxo
May 2, 2015 at 8:12 PM
Lovely! It reads so naturally, not as if you had to fit in all those random words.
May 2, 2015 at 10:05 PM
I enjoyed this poem and its message despite a few oddities forced by vocab (eg, thin clothes). I agree with you that some would find this earth connection a preparation for Zen.
May 3, 2015 at 12:01 AM
A good message now in time of spring.
May 3, 2015 at 12:56 AM
i love this one and the story it tells
May 3, 2015 at 4:36 AM
A wonderfully earthy poem.
May 3, 2015 at 6:10 AM
Nice tribute to our pioneer ancestors.
May 3, 2015 at 6:20 AM
An excellent use of the word selection. I found the second stanza to be quite in keeping with Zen principles.
May 3, 2015 at 6:24 AM
that poem made sense to me and was very visual.
May 3, 2015 at 6:40 AM
You are really good at this getting a buncha words and making a poem. That all fitted nicely. Well done. Got your note, truly happy that M was happy and delighted. Aren't surprises fun lol
May 3, 2015 at 6:53 AM
Flowing like the River . . .
Very good . . .
May 3, 2015 at 7:00 AM
Hi Gail--I felt that you were writing back of times in the wilderness here--escaping Roman centurions. Thanks.k.
May 3, 2015 at 7:14 AM
Excellent, my friend. This one really moved me. Well done.
May 3, 2015 at 7:29 AM
Now that is an old, scary looking piece of equipment.
Good poem, too!
Hope you all have a blessed day!
May 3, 2015 at 9:00 AM
Love the idea of storing tears, especially...
May 3, 2015 at 11:43 AM
That second stanza is powerful. I didn't consider using the image that went with the whirligig words - nicely done.
May 3, 2015 at 1:08 PM
I so admire farmers. I grew up surrounded by farms. The local farmer is an unsung hero.
May 3, 2015 at 1:55 PM
Opening the land of milk and honey there is promise in that..working the land fighting natural elements..storing tears..I think you have woven a story many can relate to.
May 3, 2015 at 5:07 PM
"opening the land of milk and honey" wonderful earthy poem in all ways :)
May 3, 2015 at 6:19 PM
Simple yet creative...nice post.
May 3, 2015 at 10:03 PM
I love this - especially the story it tells.
"The Dinner Bell Rings Calling Us Home"
... after a very busy day.
All the best Jan
May 4, 2015 at 3:46 AM
I've been there too, Gail! My dad would replant sometimes when my corn rows were too crooked. Neither of us were happy then.
..
May 4, 2015 at 6:33 AM
This is lovely Gail. Drew me in. I love seeing where poets go with the same 12 words. Each so unique.
May 4, 2015 at 12:14 PM
Love the 'love to earth' attitude in the poem and 'gratitude for freedom'.
May 4, 2015 at 7:35 PM
haha well done. Sounds right :-)
ZQ
May 5, 2015 at 10:03 AM
Cool, you blew this right out of the park! Bravo.
May 7, 2015 at 11:25 AM