"During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted toriding the table bareback and giving it an STD which is the cause of the "rust rash" the table has developed.
"During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted toputting his own 'special seasoning' on the grills."
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to trying it in the tree first, but his wood-pecker was not that hard.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to being married to a park bench in Cleveland, dating a Mahogany executive desk in Toledo and has fathered a couple of infant bureaus with a filing cabinet in Canton.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to being very sad and angry after his ex, the flag poll, gave him the shaft.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to a three way with a vacuum and a ironing board.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to having an extensive collection of Bob Vila videos.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to...substituting the table because he couldn't have Doc's peaches.
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted totrying to keep his table sex to the evening hours so that he could listen to the erotic sounds of the bug-zapper.
Becky.... He was apparently tipping it on its side and "using" the hole in the middle, Not a very good mental picture but hey it's tuesday word game and w go with what we have... LOL ;-)
'During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to once screwing a grand piano but while in the process learned how to play Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik with his penis.'
i come back from Vegas for this? Gosh and why didn't I see any of the guys at the Black Jack tables doing this? Oh wait, maybe that is why the dealers stand so close to them while they deal... ;)~
I have nothing. I can't beat some of these. Especially the WD-40 by Jay.
Wouldn't he have splinters on his wee-wee? Ouch.
Funny as heck though. Welcome back Doc.
April 1, 2008 at 4:51 PM
Anonymous said...
After having sex with the picnic table police said he also admitted that his family in Ireland had been pressuring him to procreate.his Mom Patty O'Furniture has no comment
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to getting a very cold, cold response at the local park recently, with his involvment with that sexy new concrete picnic table with the fancy marble inlay on top.
Shit! Pat, I worked so hard for my answer and I post it, and then I see this? How can I lose that fast? That is the funniest line I have ever, ever seen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
TMC is exempt...he stole my peaches last week. Thanks for all the submissions folks they are great! Keep them coming I will make my decision in the morning
April 1, 2008 at 9:19 PM
It's Tuesday Word game time here at YJKOBT !! That special time of the week when we take a current news story and add our own twist on it. Rumor has it that Mt. Cat tried to steal my peaches last week. Just to let you know he blamed it on my "fans." Well shame on Ya'll ;-) Well I am back this week and ready to roll with this sickening article. Give it a read below (I wish it was an April Fools Joke)
[Image]BELLEVUE, Ohio -- Police said an Ohio man has been arrested for allegedly having sex with a picnic table. Police arrested Arthur Price Jr. after an anonymous tipster dropped off three DVDs that reportedly showed Price in the act. According to NBC Toledo, Ohio, affiliate WNWO-TV, the videos show Price tilting the metal round picnic table on its side and then laying up against it to have sexual intercourse with the table. Afterward, he can then be seen cleaning the table and the deck. During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to ________________________ .
YIKES I have no idea where this guy got his fetish but I am wondering why it took the neighbors 3 times of filming him to turn him in. - Leave a comment with something else this pervert may have admitted to doing and the funniest wins a peach. Enter as often as you wish. -Doc
44 Comments
Close this window Jump to comment form"During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to using WD-40 for lube."
April 1, 2008 at 12:51 PM
"During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to riding the table bareback and giving it an STD which is the cause of the "rust rash" the table has developed.
April 1, 2008 at 12:53 PM
"During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to putting his own 'special seasoning' on the grills."
April 1, 2008 at 12:55 PM
OMG !! HAHAHAHAAAAA @ WD-40 for lube. Jay you kill me!
April 1, 2008 at 1:02 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to fantasing about a career at Home Depot
April 1, 2008 at 1:03 PM
BTW... just a side note but I wonder if Belleview, Ohio is anywhere near Bagwine, Ohio ??
April 1, 2008 at 1:06 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to:
Doing it to make the chairs jealous.
April 1, 2008 at 1:13 PM
He admitted that although less than satisfactory it was still better than continuing to pine away for his lost love, the credenza.
At least he cleaned up afterwards, hell that's more than I do for my own wife...
April 1, 2008 at 1:22 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to trying it in the tree first, but his wood-pecker was not that hard.
April 1, 2008 at 1:35 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to sucking the chrome off a trailer hitch.
April 1, 2008 at 1:41 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to being a psycho!! Hello???
April 1, 2008 at 1:42 PM
Hey Vin, Aren't you glad you weren't on the jury for this trial? HA!
April 1, 2008 at 1:44 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to arranging an orgy with the lawn gnomes.
April 1, 2008 at 1:48 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to being married to a park bench in Cleveland, dating a Mahogany executive desk in Toledo and has fathered a couple of infant bureaus with a filing cabinet in Canton.
April 1, 2008 at 1:49 PM
Knight that is so f'in funny!!! haahahahahahaha!!!!
Doc this word game is the best!!!
April 1, 2008 at 1:51 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to being very sad and angry after his ex, the flag poll, gave him the shaft.
April 1, 2008 at 2:00 PM
Thsi is certainly going to be a tough one to judge... I love all of them!
April 1, 2008 at 2:02 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to being aroused by Heather Mills' table leg.
April 1, 2008 at 2:06 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to a three way with a vacuum and a ironing board.
April 1, 2008 at 2:28 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to having an extensive collection of Bob Vila videos.
April 1, 2008 at 2:30 PM
Check out this related link...
http://spluch.blogspot.com/2008/03/worker-caught-having-sex-with-vacuum.html
At least the polish contractor's partner had a face..LOL!!!
LeapO'Faith
April 1, 2008 at 2:38 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to once being sodomized by a Swiffer Wet Jet.
April 1, 2008 at 2:42 PM
Damn, these are good and sometime already mentioned the tree thing. I can't think of anything!
April 1, 2008 at 2:45 PM
This has by far been my favorite word game. I'm cracking up over everything.
April 1, 2008 at 3:00 PM
THis is great!!! All of them are good. I'm glad I don't have to judge it. I need more time to think, I'll chime in later.
April 1, 2008 at 3:05 PM
Too funny. Mt.Cat - you are out of control today. I think might be a topic close to your heart or something...
April 1, 2008 at 3:07 PM
I have to agree with Karen... Maybe the Mt. Cat is too close to his scratching post... LOL
April 1, 2008 at 3:09 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to S&M with the neighbors ping pong table.
April 1, 2008 at 3:14 PM
I once had a rendezvous with a garden weasel. But it ended badly. I would rather not discuss it.
April 1, 2008 at 3:20 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to...substituting the table because he couldn't have Doc's peaches.
April 1, 2008 at 3:25 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to having patio umbrella envy!
April 1, 2008 at 3:42 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to trying to keep his table sex to the evening hours so that he could listen to the erotic sounds of the bug-zapper.
April 1, 2008 at 3:48 PM
How does one have sex with a picnic table?
(not a submission, an honest question).
April 1, 2008 at 3:57 PM
Becky.... He was apparently tipping it on its side and "using" the hole in the middle, Not a very good mental picture but hey it's tuesday word game and w go with what we have... LOL ;-)
April 1, 2008 at 4:06 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to ________________________ .
...enjoying his anal fixation with the town fire hydrants and getting his oral from the local pools air valves.
...being the love child of a park bench and lamp post, who had a one night stand.
I don't think anyone can compete with Mt. Cat though...maybe you should limit how often a person can win, like once a month.
April 1, 2008 at 4:21 PM
Thanks Sassy Mama Bear. How sweet of you.
'During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to once screwing a grand piano but while in the process learned how to play Mozart's Eine Kleine Nachtmusik with his penis.'
April 1, 2008 at 4:31 PM
i come back from Vegas for this? Gosh and why didn't I see any of the guys at the Black Jack tables doing this? Oh wait, maybe that is why the dealers stand so close to them while they deal... ;)~
I have nothing. I can't beat some of these. Especially the WD-40 by Jay.
Wouldn't he have splinters on his wee-wee? Ouch.
Funny as heck though. Welcome back Doc.
April 1, 2008 at 4:51 PM
After having sex with the picnic table police said he also admitted that his family in Ireland had been pressuring him to procreate.his Mom Patty O'Furniture has no comment
April 1, 2008 at 5:36 PM
ROTFLMAO @ Pat! Too funny!!
April 1, 2008 at 5:39 PM
During questioning, he reportedly admitted to having sex with the table. Police said he also admitted to getting a very cold, cold response at the local park recently, with his involvment with that sexy new concrete picnic table with the fancy marble inlay on top.
April 1, 2008 at 6:23 PM
his Mom Patty O'Furniture has no comment
Shit! Pat, I worked so hard for my answer and I post it, and then I see this? How can I lose that fast?
That is the funniest line I have ever, ever seen!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
April 1, 2008 at 6:30 PM
There's no way in HELL I can compete with "Patty O'Furniture"!!
Great topic this week Doc! Sorry I missed out on it.
April 1, 2008 at 6:57 PM
I vote for Sassy Mama, Micky-t, Jay or Pat. I think TMC should be exempt.
April 1, 2008 at 7:19 PM
TMC is exempt...he stole my peaches last week. Thanks for all the submissions folks they are great! Keep them coming I will make my decision in the morning
April 1, 2008 at 9:19 PM