A couple of stories - one very recent, one not so recent...

Apparently, there's a gesture here in Russia used to indicate association with the mafia, and it gets you out of everything from waiting for traffic to paying for vodka. A few of my friends onboard here were headed out for a guys night and their taxi became stuck in traffic, waiting for an accident to be handled by the police and ambulance and whatever. The driver decided not to wait - he pulled out of the lane and drove up and through the scene of the accident. When he got a look from police, he made this gesture involving a flick of the neck. When asked what was going on, he explained in one word - "mafia."

Once the guys were at their destination bar, one of them approached the bar and, mimicking the gesture used by the cab driver, said only "vodka." Keep in mind this is a place notorious for tricking unknowing foreigners into paying hugely inflated sums for drinks... well, when the bartender saw this gesture, he nodded and reached under the bar. He came out with a large full bottle of some of the best vodka they had, and simply handed my friend the whole bottle without a word. No payment, no nothing - just matter of fact. I figure they're lucky no actual mafia was there to see this take place, because I imagine some ...um... hurt feelings may be involved at this posturing.

Yesterday I was reminded of a story from last year, in Lisbon. I know very little Spanish. Enough to get me back to the ship and around a little bit in Spain. Here is an example of how Spanish is NOT Portugese. We were out in Lisbon one night and trying to get back to the ship - the driver was not getting it. I cannot spell anything in either of these languages correctly, but suffice to say that the words for "ship" are similar if not the same, but the Spanish word for "cruise" is apparently VERY close to the Portugese word for... well, that comes later. The driver kept giving me strange looks every time I said this. We wound up being dropped off about a mile from the ship down a long wharf street because though we could see the ship we couldn't get it through to the driver that we didn't want the terminal, we wanted that ship. The cobblestones were not a good walk for someone in heels... and no, that wasn't me. I think. It was over a year ago.

Anyway, the next night I was asking a Portugese maitre'd friend of mine what I'd said wrong, and he explained to me that as repeated what I was saying time and time again inhopes of maybe getting the driver to understand "cruise ship"... such repetition being the very definition of insanity ... apparently I had been over and again insisting that we be taken to the crucifixion ship, the ship on which they crucify. The Spanish word I knew for "cruise" is apparently closer to the Portugese word for "crucify" than anything else. Spanish is not Portugese. Obregad.(o).