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*1/2 (of four)

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The kitchen staff of the restaurant I work in is populated almost exclusively with African-American males between the ages of 17 and 50, and a frequent debate during downtimes is for the title of Greatest MC Ever. There was a heated argument going on a couple weeks back - one teenage kid thought Jay-Z was the best ever, while another one was arguing for Nas. Neither one would give way, and both were in fact yelling so loud the customers could hear them out front. And I managed to jump in with, "Guys, guys - I don't know why you're arguing about who's the best rapper. For my money, it begins and ends with Chris Brown." Which was the biggest laugh I've gotten in months from the kitchen brother crew.

If you're not familiar, Chris Brown is part of the next generation of Usher clones (Pretty Ricky, Young Jeezy) ready-made for TRL. He's like sixteen, light-skinned, just an okay singer and doesn't rap. Chris is more a choreographed-dance type of act, and over the course of the "Yo" video, he dances into the heart of a gorgeous-ass rented model who won't give him the time of day when she first walks past the shoe store he just got fired from. He follows her down the street, dancing with two guys he apparently doesn't even know, busts some more moves on the basketball court and eventually climbs into her back seat and starts making out with her.

That's not even the halfway point - we also have to suffer through a dance sequence on a black Cadillac hood and an Interlude That Has Nothing To Do With The Video. It's enough to make you wish Chris would just go back to working in the shoe store. Watching him try to squeeze some high heels onto a belligerent, 400-pound lady who swears she's a Size 7... now there's your video.