|Occupation||Analectician, Conspirator, Œcumenical Volgi|
|Location||Castle Gormogon, Plateau of Leng|
|Introduction||I like to put out that I'm a transmitter who invented nothing. But, dude, I invented a whole lotta crap. I just can't tell you about it. Seriously, the NDA at the Gormogons is a bitch. Let's just say there used to be a Blabby the Sixth Gormogon. I am constantly answering stupid questions from the likes of that moron Adept Gung. I'm thinking of having him transferred to a Ch'an monastery where they lop your hands off when you raise them to ask about enlightenment. My favorite drink is a combination of jasmine tea, the Liao Drug, and the tears of the innocent. When fasting in preparation for sacrifice I must wear the Bright Robe, and it must be of linen. I must change my food and also the place where I commonly sit. I do not object to my rice being thoroughly cleaned, nor to my meat being finely minced. In bed, I avoid lying in the posture of a corpse.|
|Interests||Rectification of Names, Foreign Policy, Umlautology, Diacritical Marks, Live Languages, Dead Languages, Killing Languages, Slipping through the Veil of Time and Space, Condemning my enemies to the Nine Hells—particularly the Chamber of Dismemberment by Chariot the Chamber of the Mountain of Knives the Chamber of Heart-Ripping and the Chamber of Bad '80s Cover Songs, Searching for the National House of Pancakes, World Domination|
|Favorite Movies||Tarkan & the Blood of the Vikings, Hotel de Love, London After Midnight, Der Golem und die Tänzerin, Sehnsucht, King Kong Appears in Edo, Too Much Johnson (Orson Welles), 大小黄天霸, Bezhin Meadow, Charlie's Angels III: The Search for Charlie's Gold, Pistol-Packin’ Possum, Abe Lincoln: Pet Detective, The Erotic Adventures of Hercules, Les Cousins Dangereux, Kung Fu U, Chubby Rain, Happy Scrappy Hero Pup|
|Favorite Music||Chuck Brown & the Soul Searchers, The Ming opera "The White Snake, " Whitesnake, The muffled maddening beating of vile drums and the thin monotonous whine of accursed flutes|
|Favorite Books||論語—idiots, Sir Alan Gardiner's Egyptian Grammar, Neopoliani Magioe Naturalis, Clavis Solomonis, Call Her Wanton, The Grimoire of Pope Honorius III, το Νεκρονομικον, Lusty Ladies of Lesbos 2: Mnasdikē’s Temptation, The Telos of Species, Not that rip-off artist Mencius’s crap, Genghis Khan's diary (I've got the only copy suckaz)|
What kind of tape is best for creating a sculpture?
Chromium Dioxide. CrO₂ really brings Dolby B noise reduction to today’s three-dimensional art.