tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-9934504.post-64875718534896579332007-09-12T18:38:00.000-05:002007-09-12T18:54:35.509-05:00<span style="font-weight: bold;">Attention:</span> All but my autonomic functions are now carried out by either calculators, Mac Widgets, or Wikipedia.<br /><br />It has come to my sudden and humiliating attention that I have off-loaded nearly all of my higher-brain functions to a distributed system of gadgets and wiring. I allow the web and internet to serve as my memory. Calculators, spell-check, and graphing systems serve the entire necessity that used to be my Left Brain.<br /><br />The fact that even basic arithmetic eludes me to this day would depress my high school Math Teacher even further, if he hadn't already realized that I'm in the arts and a blogger. Two identifiers that show I've completely abandoned reason and order.<br /><br />What makes this finding all the more humiliating was that I came to this realization in public eye and on record. It was in a rudimentary employment application in which I was to abstract and sum-total a series of numbers. All of them involving cash money. Quarters and nickels mainly. I should have known immediately that I was in a losing struggle. For you see, money and me have a weak relationship; the other barely conscious of what the other actually <span style="font-style: italic;">does</span>.<br /><br />Like losing a $3 lotto ticket to a blundered skill-testing question, I had to retreat empty handed and feeling ashamed for trying. My giant toe-head hung low in failure this day.<br /><br />I figure my skills are best left to the realm of the unreal. Drawing pictures of ponies and mastering fonts are the mental challenges best suited for my ilk. I'm in art for a reason: I'm bad at math.<br /><br />Also, there's rarely live nude models in accounting.Mike Classichttp://www.blogger.com/profile/10638704331766363813noreply@blogger.com