Vexxarr News

Devil, Details and Life

2008-04-30T21:45:00.000-07:00

For those of you who care about such things (hello, Roy) I have posted the background of the post-apocalyptic Epsilon Beta Schlumpy for you to see:

It has a Seussian quality that I find not unpleasant. Also, I'd like to occasionally show you the kind of detail that - all things being equal - I'd rather not do BUT feel compelled to provide.

Those tiny voices...

Damn them. Damn them to hell!

Solar Units

2008-04-18T02:09:00.000-07:00

Yes, yes, yes...

Technically only our star is Sol. So the Bleen Navy would still likely use the term AU (astronomical units) but derive the short side of the triangle from the relationship between Bleen and their sun. Yet, an AU has become such an Earth-Centric term that - although potentially generic - it sounds specific to our sun and our orbit (and the distance from both whereby the Earth and Sol appear to be one degree of arc apart).

edit: It has been pointed out that I have confused an AU - the distance of Earth from Sol and a Parsec - the triangulation of Earth and Sun to one degree of arc. I'm blaming it on fatigue.

So where was i?

Oh, yeah. So by Solar Unit I mean a (Whatever the Bleen call their sun)-ar unit...translated from Bleen into English.

Good enough?

So now you know what keeps me awake at night...and why I have no friends.

I sleep now.

Perspective

2008-04-16T13:10:00.000-07:00

Well...Now I see how it is...

I would have thought that the new perspective of the bridge would have elicited Oooo's and Aaah's.

But no.

I am taken for granted.

See if I bother showing you what is really on Carl's screen now...

Taa Daa!!!

2008-04-14T16:59:00.000-07:00

Taxes Filed ! Celebrity Filmed ! Today's Vexxarr Posted... Today !!!

Urban Planning Video (sentbackforfurtherrevisionsand I'llhearbackfromthemsometimenextweek) !

So my pledge endures. I endure. Both as a result of Diet Code Red administered via constant intravenous transfusion.

I need some sleep...

Unexpected Work - Late Bonus Update

2008-04-13T22:53:00.000-07:00

...BUT still all caught up by tonight.

I've had taxes, a birthday, a long-format video for the Jefferson County and a commercial shoot with a football celebrity (who never appeared). Yet I still manage to get you one more strip.

Again, I invoke my pledge: I shall produce a strip for each and every Monday Wednesday and Friday until either the day I die or the very last sun is extinguished from the heavens.

And I wouldn't place any bets on which will happen first if I were you...

So more Vexxarr for you today. Less sleep for me tonight. And I'll be anxiously awaiting all those T-Shirt sales which help to keep my i.v. filled and my respirator pumping. But don't feel guilty...

Still One Comic Behind

2008-04-12T01:26:00.000-07:00

But I did TECHNICALLY update three times this week...

SO...

You get Friday's and Monday's on Monday - how lucky for you! And I noticed a marked SPIKE in my readership this week. From whence do you come?

I always enjoy hearing where readers found my humble strip.

Amuse me...

Or DIE.

Happy Birthday to Me!

2008-04-09T22:56:00.000-07:00

Yes, Hunter the cartoonist, the filmmaker, the (fake) castle builder and the Mac Parody Guy has turned 41.

It started with a dull ache in the back of my head and progressed to a burning sensation engulfing my entire body. Soon my flesh began to disintegrate into dust and my bones suddenly exploded like dry plaster in a kiln. In the end, the small pile of my granular remains sat like chalk dust awaiting the sunrise. And just as the first amber fingers of the new day touched my dessicated form, it gently took flight upon the morning breeze...

Late Late Late

2008-04-09T01:29:00.000-07:00

OK, the trifecta of tardiness...

I have a huge project which refuses to die, it's my birthday and the IRS wants a fraction of the money which I did not make.

So, Vexxarr marches on but seems to be a day out of sync. Those of you who know me know I will make things right - and by right , I mean three comics a week.

Those of you who don't know me, will assume the worst - and on a purely philosophical level you will be correct. But not about the comics.

So Take today's offering for yesterday and I promise today's tomorrow after today's is done yesterday.

I'm going to sleep now.

Fish.

April Fools!

2008-04-01T02:07:00.000-07:00

But you already knew this, didn't you?

Just a little fun and wishful thinking on my part. New comic tomorrow. Maybe even a funny one!

Tweaks

2008-03-23T11:21:00.000-07:00

We are implementing a new calendar archive so bear with us. Till then, enjoy the new enhanced day by day archive with the pully downy story arch menu and new support for non standard images (expect the April Fools comics to return).

We'll get this worked out yet!

Arthur C Clarke

2008-03-19T00:33:00.000-07:00

I'm re-reading The Sentinel tonight. Clarke's insights on Lunar Sausage proved to be prophetic.

New comics Thursday and Friday.

Crabs Are Complicated

2008-03-12T00:09:00.000-07:00

Yes, I know.

The crab home world (Mother Rock in my scripts) seems devoid of rock crabs (silicoids in my scripts). The truth is, drawing the little buggers is a chore. Yes, I know...I have added Sid (yes, that's his name) to the roster of regular characters. As a result, I have embarked on a champaign of finding ways to interpose simple objects between Sid and the viewer's perspective. I may also resort to a model sheet of Sid's expressions and gestures and just cut and paste him into the comic. This is also something I am about to do for Minionbot (Minionbot 107 in my scripts). Because the automata in the Vexxverse need to appear symmetrical and proportionally consistent, I don't view use of a cheat sheet as cheating per se.

Which, of course, it is.

One way or the other, I'll depict more crabs and less mutable robots. Thus far, the only character regularly conjured from the clipboard is Carl for obvious reasons.

By the way, anyone notice that the rack of testing server blades from Groom Lake still sits behind Carl on the bridge? There are still little tools on its top as well...

Sao Tome and Principe

2008-02-20T08:57:00.000-08:00

OK, so I use Stat Counter to keep up with you guys. And there is a fun feature that lets me monitor you in real time with a map (and I can see you in your underwear too...). I see that I have readers in Scandinavia, Germany, England, Australia and across the US. I even have readers in Ukraine, Russia and a lone reader on the Isle of Man. Sometimes I give what the man in the street would call a 'shout-out'. Although when I use that exact turn of phrase I taste bile...

Excuse me. *ahem*
Anyway I have noticed that I have a mystery reader, off the coast of Ghana, Africa near Sao Tome. The only problem is that there is no land mass associated with the marker. Of course I have constructed elaborate fantasies involving oil platforms, man-made archipelagos or Bond-villain-style undersea fortresses with missiles and henchmen in silver jumpsuits but I'm curious to know the truth. Who are you, where are you reading Vexxarr from and why do you make your henchmen wear silver jumpsuits?

Actually, when you have time, I'd love for you guys to drop into our forums and send a message about where all of you readers are from and how the heck you found this comic while surfing the web in Siberia.

Yes. Seriously.

SHIRTS!

2008-02-08T02:21:00.000-08:00

Arrived!

Soon, they will move your way!

I am SO sorry about the delay. The long wait is now a short one. I am dedicating myself to the movement of Vexxarr Merch exclusively tomorrow.

So.

If you were awaiting a shirt or a print - tomorrow is the day!

...that they ship. God knows when they will actually arrive. At least after tomorrow it won't be my fault.

Have I mentioned that I love each and every one of you?

Catching Up

2008-02-03T21:02:00.000-08:00

Yes, I'm overburdened with freelance work and trivial issues in my life. For those of you who have not completely abandoned me in my time of extremity, you have noticed some of my Youtube offerings. Chief among these video morsels is my old Mac Parody Crash Different. In between actual work and what little time I allot myself for food, exercise and sleep, I have been defending the veracity of the issues raised by the Mac rant. After some semantical back-and-forth, I found out that despite a finite population on this planet, some of you are seeing the damn thing for the first time. I shall repeat here what I should have said up front on my Youtube space: Crash Different is five years old. Some of the gripes I outline in that narrative have actually been addressed by Apple (shocking though that may be). SO if you have a quibble over my quibbles, try to keep them in the proper context...

...it's the internet. No one cares.

Boston vs Mooninites...FIGHT!

2008-01-31T09:21:00.000-08:00

Let us take time to remember the Mooninite invasion of Boston one year ago wherein the mayor (Thomas M. Menino) ignored both good information and internet memes.

This is not a criticism of the Boston Police and emergency response teams who, acting on orders from the mayor, did a near perfect job of securing a huge metropolitan area and showing exactly how a coordinated response effort is supposed to unfold.

No, this is a reminder that many of or elected leaders are aging, isolated fuddy duddies who absolutely need to get out more.

Let us all recall that Boston was one of many major metropolitan areas in the US where a guerrilla marketing firm had L E D Moonanite signs posted in an effort to raise US awareness of the AQUA TEEN HUNGER FORCE movie to a fever pitch.

Let us recall that these guerrilla placement missions were video taped and posted online for months prior to the incident in Boston.

Let us recall that Boston Bomb authorities also detonated a traffic counting device just weeks following the event. No one was charged in this "hoax".

Let us all remember that other major metropolitan areas - Los Angeles, New York, Seattle, Philadelphia, Portland, San Francisco - all identified the objects as harmless and either removed them or left them in place.

Let us all recall that Google exists.

That said, I submit that the incident in Boston, the confusion which followed and any expenses incurred were the sole responsibility of the Mayor's Office of Boston. This is not to say that Mayor Thomas M. Menino was necessarily wrong in activating his reaction teams. Thomas M. Menino's only mistake was not having access to a media team to research the issue with all resources available once the effort was underway.

Look folks, innocent bomb scares happen. Things get blown up by mistake. The police will, on occasion, be called for an emergency that doesn't exist. As I've stated before, just because I leave my lunch box on a park bench and the bomb squad is called out to detonate my bologna sandwich, doesn't mean the the mayor's office gets to charge me with a hoax.

The incident in Boston was a simple misunderstanding. The charges filed by the city of Boston on the individuals responsible were a simple face-saving measure. The entire event was a perfect storm of media and pop-culture un-awareness, failure to heed good information and simply living in a time of heightened awareness. In the end, Aqua Teen Hunger Force got some headline exposure, the Boston authorities got an excellent disaster drill and Thomas M. Menino got to get out a little bit and smell the roses. Which he needs to do more often...

Bologna sandwiches will get detonated from time to time. It's no one's fault. Take it as experience and move on.

Transpermia

2008-01-30T13:46:00.000-08:00

Sometimes I wonder if my scripts cause a wave of search traffic over at New Scientist and Wired. And if those administrators look at the traffic querying words like transpermia and gigantomachy and wonder what exactly is wrong with the world...

To them the question is merely rhetorical. I, in fact, know...

And now a word from our sponsor...

2008-01-28T11:28:00.000-08:00

No, this isn't why today's comic is late. But if it were, it might almost be worth it.

Enjoy.

Lots of Work - Little Time

2008-01-19T12:24:00.000-08:00

You know the drill...

I have tonnes of work and only so much waking-time. In most comic enterprises, this would result in a skipped strip and a lame apology.

Well here at www.exxarr.com we do things a little differently.
At www.vexxarr.com we give you and exceedingly weak excuse AND I make up all the due strips and back-post them to the archives.

I mean, isn't that better? It's like you get to store up my strips in your little cheek-pouches and then enjoy then - en mass if you will - later, back in your little rodent den.

Oh come now, I've seen you. Your little straw bed, your little wood-knot hole. You, reading Vexxarr while clutching a sunflower seed in your two, thumbless paws.

Makes me want to pet you all...

2008-01-12T13:03:00.000-08:00

Assuming you guys aren't already watching all the video (that there is) on my YouTube account...MORE stupid roommate!

MY ROOMMATE THE IDIOT: BURNING ROM

Idiot - Jeremy Renta
Not Idiot - Josh Davenpot
Doctor - Hunter Cressall

More Silliness

2008-01-10T00:22:00.000-08:00

If you liked Beef jerky, you'll love Bees!

MY ROOMMATE THE IDIOT: BEES

Idiot - Jeremy Renta
Not Idiot - Josh Davenpot
Doctor - Hunter Cressall

Video Goodness for You!

2008-01-07T09:09:00.000-08:00

My friends and I have been busy... So enjoy the fruits of our twisted souls. Or meats, if you will... A special kudos to George Milton for his musical talent...

MY ROOMMATE THE IDIOT: BEEF JERKY

Idiot - Jeremy Renta
Not Idiot - Josh Davenpot
Doctor - Hunter Cressall

Calendar Woes

2008-01-05T12:03:00.000-08:00

Once again our archive calendar has collapsed. Once again the Stalwart Ratzmandious (Carl) has saved the day. It makes me thank God that there is such a thing as England and that it will write code for a .php calendar implementation.

God save the Queen. Thank her for my archives.

A humble ex patriot, rebel and nerd,

H

** update **

The calendar is fixed...if a bit...er...expanded. My thanks to Carl, my coding expert and benefactor. Forgive me if adding the back-dated comics clear to 1969 does not occur with unbridled alacrity.

I did however catch us up to Friday so there that at least.

Wednesday?

2008-01-02T14:33:00.001-08:00

Sorry gang,

Had to take a personal day for...WORK. I figure you've gotten two bonus ministrips for Christmas and New Year's Day so you should be happy. Still, I'll stack two on Friday just to make good on my ner' ending pledge.

Long live the Vexxarr!

Anti-Vista

2008-01-01T10:47:00.000-08:00

Many of you may know me from my Mac Parody. This has given the erroneous impression to some that I loathe Apple and (by some bizarre opposition calculus) love Microsoft.

I think that I have made my position clear that I hate Operating Systems in general. It should therefore be - by extension - no surprise that I have a bone to pick with Vista.

This is true.

Yet with Vista, it is not a mere bone but rather and entire Harryhausen-ian horde of skeletal warriors...that I pick.

(ahem)

Let me start over.

I became acquainted with Vista Home Edition with my new laptop. I knew that my Acer Aspire 3680 came with Vista pre-installed but I figured that I would give it a shot. Well, what they say about its performance drag and peripheral incompatibilities is true. Having lived through both Windows 98 and Windows 2000, I can tell you that Vista's birthing woes are objectively worse than one would expect from any new operating system - and this includes OSX which was a complete reboot of the Apple product line.

Now Vista at its core has many things going for it. It is at least as stable as Windows XP which is to say as stable as any home computing device gets these days (sorry Apple). It is very easy on the eyes. It is also fairly intuitive. However, in order to truly enjoy Vista, you must not only be logged on as administrator (something Microsoft now inexplicably discourages) but you must be at least a little familiar with administrative rights, servers and networks as Vista operates in this sort of world. What this means to the average user is that Vista will do things - strange things - at inconvenient and often disastrous times. From my point of view even the fact that Vista does things when I'm not telling it explicitly to do things is itself a bit shady.

Add to this the fact that Vista has a comedicly large footprint, saps resources and generally acts like a blob of poor coding and you have a rather off-putting user end experience. Pardon me for placing some credibility with Microsoft when I say that they simply should have known better.

Now Microsoft wants us - and by us I mean the entire planet - to drop 2000, NT and XP and adopt Vista even though it doesn't work like a finished piece of code. Consumers have responded in the appropriate fashion by uninstalling Vista and going back to whatever worked best for them. In my case, I purchased my first copy of XP Pro and am happy to report that it is a slick and jim-dandy operating system! Still apologists are trying to create a parallel world where consumers are happy with Vista and Microsoft need not address their blunder.

The problem is this. We the consumers need to be able to decide what works and what doesn't (this means you too Steve Jobs). When something comes out like Vista that has some game-ending issues the consumer needs to be heard on the matter.

Microsoft? We'll just drop support for XP so you HAVE to buy Vista.

Well this time there is something we can do. Dell and many others offer XP (again) on most new machines. When purchasing a new PC please ask you retailer for XP (you'll thank me) and if they don't offer XP for that computer ask for a system for which that they can. If they don't have anything you can use that comes with XP please say no thank-you and tell them why. There are plenty of reputable computer vendors who will build a nice system and include a licensed version of Windows 2000 or XP at your option. In this way, we can force Microsoft to address Vista's fundamental failure and maybe try something new like a total OS reboot (it worked for Apple).

We need to be firm on this and we need to stick to our guns. If the future is Vista, we can look forward to a PC price point (due to performance requirements) closer to that of Apple. We can look forward to feeling as helpless with our home computers as we do at work on the office network. Most of all we can look forward to losing the personal of personal computing. Microsoft has written some pretty impressive GUI in the past. Based on my experience with the Xbox 360, I know that they still do. Vista wasn't a planned violation of good code execution, it was an error in judgment. All we need to do is force Microsoft to admit their mistake and go back to the drawing board. Think it can't happen?

Ladies and gentlemen, I give you OS 9.