Aubergine Dreams

Yes I'm very dull, no I've not been anywhere else, yes i'd love to, but no I won't afford it, not in this life time anyway :(

2005-12-08T20:23:00.000Z

create your own visited countries map
or vertaling Duits Nederlands

Yes, I'm still alive

2005-10-30T14:51:00.000Z

Just about. I've been busy knitting, moping, slaving away at work etc.

Just a quick one about more stuff I feel I really need. I caved and bought the boots though so I really can't justify it. I mean, I probably could justify it, but my bank wouls stomp all over me with charges on the extra cash I'd need and I've only bought one present so far for christmas and there's only one more payday unless I shop on Christmas eve.

I have this tattoo on my right calf. It's from a book by HR Giger called the Mystery of St. Gottardo. Now there's jewellery to be had and I love it!

Where's the billionaire with the Angina when you need him, eh?

BTW, I don't think I ever mentioned my tattoo's before, did I? I'm not sure. I have 10 in all. Fun fact for the day is that.

2005-08-30T21:23:00.000Z

was going to post something about a wedding I went to and various recent house sitting duties, but there's a hedgehog crunching it's way through a saucer of slug covered catfood just outside my back door, so I'm off to watch her with my fingers in my ears instead.

I know it's rude to stare at someone when they're eating, and she's probably flea ridden and will pass on ticks to my cats, but she's sooooo cute, scrunching up her little eyes when she hits slug instead of supermeat.

We don't put it out for her, btw, it's the cats that he's refusing to eat because he's too hot; and it's outside to prevent it drawing fly's, wasps, slugs and all our neighbour's cats into our kitchen while it's too warm to shut the door yet.

2005-08-13T21:47:00.000Z

At the moment I'm happy and content.
In the grand scheme of things I'm still a moody miserable cow, but this week has brought a few nice things that have cheered me up.

I finally got a book delivered from Amazon that I've been waiting ages for. It's the latest translated work by my favorite artist Junko Mizuno.
It's several pieces done as a serial, collated into one book.

"In this dreamy science fiction fantasy, Junko Mizuno illustrates a story full of catfights, alien safari adventures, evil experiments and a girl who dreams of becoming a pop idol. Following the Third World War, humankind left the toxic surface of the Earth and built an underground city to survive. A serious social problem has emerged in this new society: hyperorexia, or severe overeating, a side effect of the "Pure Trance" life-sustaining pill."

Wow, all my favorites, who could want more.

I have all of her stuff, some English translations and some in Japanese (some in both I'm ashamed to say) and some magazines or books which contain just one page or one teeny illustration by her.
She's one of the few people who's stuff I'll actually admit I'm an out and out fan of.
"Fans" always strike me as a bit creepy and obsessive. I don't see why you need to know every particle of information about someone to appreciate their art, writing or film making. A bit of back ground can be enlightening, but it can also sap all the magic out of a performance or a piece.
So I'm a fan of her work, and admire her for her work, but I couldn't tell you her star sign or anything, like I say, fandom can be creepy as hell.

I also just finished a Modesty Blaise book.
I love Modesty, I want to be her. I love the total retro escapist nonsense of those books. I've read all but one and a bit. The one is proving hard to get hold of and the bit I have, but it's a short story in a collection where Modesty and Willie DIE! I'm putting it off and may never actually read it.

On Monday My mate took me to see Devils Rejects. I was almost put off by the fact that it's the sequel to House of 1000 Corpses, which is dire, even when watched while half cut, but he wanted to treat me to a trip to the movies and it was that or Charlie and the Chocolate Factory (no, no and no again!).
I really enjoyed it, and he was right, I did need a trip to the movies, I hadn't been in what seemed like and age!
It's actually a good film, bit self indulgent at times and shameless rip off of / beautifully done homage to, 70's road movies and horror (Texas chainsaw for sure). It's slick and smoothly done and has a really good soundtrack, i.e. no White Zombie.

I watched, and have no shame in admitting to watching, the first episodes of Lost, which has just started screening over here. It was the reviews that compared it to Twin Peaks that won me over the most.
It's sod all like Twin Peaks, too polished and neat, but it is a bit fucking weird. Only a bit mind, it's still very mainstream.
I enjoyed it thoroughly though, I know I'm going to be hooked, for Dr Jack if nothing else (OK you can throw things at me for my being a total girl now if you like).

My Nan made a batch of raspberry jam and I've been eating it on crusty bread with English butter all week.

For those of you overseas, specifically in the US, Jam is the stuff which comes in jars, made from fruit boiled up with sugar and pectin (my Nan uses currants instead of packet pectin, nicer by far, I think you can use apple juice or gooseberries too, but don't take my word for it).

You call it Jelly, it's not Jelly, jelly is the stuff thats made from fruit flavoured Gelatine, is made in molds, is eaten with icecream by children at parties, and wobbles on a plate.

You call that Jello. Knock yourselves out with that one, but don't call Jam Jelly.

I've also been knitting some more, which has almost dented the happy theme. I won't go on too much and turn this into a knitting blog, most knitting stuff is totally lost on none knitters, and can, frankly, get a bit dull.

I've been doing an intarsa pattern, also known as fairisle, which is where you knit a pattern with different coloured wool.

It's also a way to find out swear words you didn't know you knew as it's really fucking difficult!

I've unraveled it twice. I'm trying very hard to stay zen about it and have a piece of piss scarf going on the side to switch to when it get near to throwing it out the window or burning it. I think it's good though that I'm mature enough now to see when it needs to be unraveled and started over, rather than having a tantrum and giving up or just plowing on and undoing up with a mess.

That makes me happy.

That's all for now.

2005-08-02T17:52:00.000Z

4 pages of strip to screen comparisons for Sin City.

Even more absa-fucking-lutely amazing than I first thought it was.

2005-07-27T22:28:00.000Z

On blogger depression

2005-07-25T18:25:00.000Z

Hmmm.
If you have brown skin, don't have a very good command of the english language, come from a country where people do carry guns in the street, organised crime is a real issue, and so if you see a bunch of armed guys running at you (failing to reveal themselves as police officers until you're already fleeing in blind panic, according to some witness reports), it's a fucking good idea to run like hell;
watch out, you're fair game.

Having worked for the court service and a criminal law solicitors, I've seen how very often the police fuck up due to over unprofessional, emotional responses and dumb, macho bullishness, it scares me that there's so little condemnation of their laxity anyway (often, btw, leading to a real criminal escaping conviction through their stupidity) let alone when they're armed.

I've read of, heard of and spoken to people, "normal" folk, just going about their day, who've been affronted and outraged that they've simply been stopped and searched by the police because they fitted one profile or another (young and black, male and asian, middle aged creepy looking loner) or been in a certain place at a sensitve time.
The reasons that happened to them, the justification given, is barely a heartbeat away from the reasons that an innocent man, who came to our country to work hard because he heard it was safe here and free from the violence rife in his homeland, got shot five times in the head at close range while being held down.

You got him in the head, at close range, why five times if you're not being over-emotional or trigger happy? I can see why any londoner would be emotional, angry and afraid right now, but that's not what armed police officers are PAID to be, they're supposed to be professionals, paid for with my tax money.
For many this is showing to be a case of "not in my name (as long as it's not in my back yard)", don't shoot the arabs over there, but knock yourself out over here.

Never mind how much it costs the taxpayer (that'd be me then) when some numbnuts gorilla in blue serge lets off a few rounds.

This is why I avoid social comment, I have an acid stomach now.

On a less angry note, anyone who read about my change in sanitary protection a couple of posts ago, Aunt flo's gone home, and the diva cup was fantastic!
None of the faintly icky new problems I'd anticipated, and none of the niggles I'd had with other options. I'm a convert, almost evangelical, and despite being a bit expensive, it'll have paid for itself within three months.
And I get to be a smug enviornmentally friendly person.

aye me

2005-07-22T22:51:00.000Z

I'm really unsure how I feel about today's shooting in London. I know there are huge and far reaching reasons and repercussions, but I'm not a journalist nor a political blogger. I write this for me, about me, so I'm writing about how this has made me feel.
It'll ramble on for ages, so if you think I should feel some kind of obligation towards social comment or repotage, you may as well bugger off because I don't.
I care and am interested, but that's not what my blog is for.

I don't want my (relatively speaking) beautiful free country to become a place where the police need to shoot people, especially 5 times while already being pinned down.
I well accept that the guy probably did pose a large, immediate and deadly threat, and the police had to respond with similar force, but our police being armed gives my the heeby's, let alone when the officer reacts in a way which wouldn't look out of place on screen in some multiplex.
The police force is neccessary and includes many fine officers who do a difficult job well. It also attracts some of the most heinous arseholes in the universe. Then they arm them.
I have to say, if I was passionate enough about something to strap a bomb to myself, you'd have to be fucking quick on the draw to shoot me before I pushed the button, so guns against fanatics with bombs sits uneasily with me.

So, feeling uneasy and insecure, I want to aquire things, stuff.
Part of the reason I have my big debt is that, when I get upset, insecure or anxious, especially when they're a result of one of my depressive downswings, I spend money. I felt all of these in spades after my ex was done with fucking with my head.

Buying aquiring stuff makes me feel safe, better. It gets absurd, If I didn't cave and start back on my meds every now and then, I'd be one of those crazies living surrounded by boxes unopened and only bought for the sake of buying.

I love beautiful things anyway, and books, but the road I go down when upset is absurd. I'm a big girl, but I'll buy clothes that will never fit me. It's not self delusion or wishful thinking, I do it because they're beautiful and I'll feel better for having them even though I can't wear them.

Stuff will never let you down, change it's mind, lie, cheat, none of that crap you get with people. Getting new stuff makes me feel safe. I'm not shallow enough to think that stuff, or spesific "cool" or exclusive stuff makes me a special or better person, that you are what you own, it just makes me feel safe.

I've got a handle on my spending (sorta) these days. I have an amazon wishlist with over 400 items, I dump it in there instead of the basket.
I have a folder in my explorer favorites list called "want it", I save the links there and while I may spend a vast and unhealthy amount of time pouring over them, I don't buy.

This unease that isn't a fear of being blown up, but a fear of the changes in the air, has got be wanting things. I've fond mountians of things I want, I've actually got to the checkout stage on three sites tonight before talking myself down.

But then I do actually want these, as my old ones just like them died. I'd feel so happy to get that box delivered to my door, providing a continuity with the times gone where I felt confident and free, when I could go out wearing these (yes, looking quite a lot like some kind of gothic punk hooker, lord knows how/if I actually carried it off).
I don't think I'd wear them now, but the pull is so strong.

The things that go on inside my head scare me sometimes. I'm not about to kill a train full of people because of my belief in aquiring stuff, I can't hurt anyone by needing new beautiful things.
I'm not saying my neuroses have parity with a fanatical religious conviction, or that such total faith in the fairytales of religion is indicative of mental illness, but it scares me what people's wants and needs drive them to do, what they feel the need to do to feel safe, because I can see in myself how it escelates and overrides sense.

2005-07-13T22:02:00.000Z

fucking blogger is formatting my post. I want spaces between my paragraphs dammit and it is refusing to put them in. Fuckers.

Possible TMI Alert

2005-07-13T21:37:00.000Z

Possibly too much info coming up.

Just a warning, especially for the gents/blokes that read this, I know guys can get squeemish about some stuff, and this IS a little gross in places.

It's not period stuff, but is close

I know this is a tad gross, but it's pissing me off something royal so I'm blogging it because I don't have to share a home or workplace with any of you lot.

I have an in-growing hair in my minge!

It won't stop, it's been like it for nearly two months now and it won't go away! It's like a spot, not a nasty infectious sex thing (Ah, sex, I dimly remember sex...) it's up near the top hair line, a bit to the left (my left, just to help with the LOVELY mental picture), like the kind of in-growing hair guys get in their beards, but witht the extra wiry pube factor to make it more annoying.

I wash properly, I exfoliate like a good girl, I keep it all neat, sometimes I'm bored and it all goes anyway (try to avoid that because of annoying hedgehog-in-knickers feeling that follows) but then this bugger pops up, or doesn't. I gave in and burst the sucker and the hair was a MILE long, all growing under the skin. I duely yanked it out (erm, ouch much?!) and TCP'd the whole area. But nope, it starts back in, and it's still in-growing! Yanked and doused with TCP once more, then AGAIN it happens.

I've broken the skin a little and done the TCP but I don't want to mess too much in case it bleeds, then I'd have a scab, then it wouldn't grow past it.

I'm irritated, apart from showering in bleach I don't know what else I can do and I'm sooooo impatient and I know in my heart the best thing now is to leave it alone unless it starts to look ominous.

And I have a spotty minge, which despite not being an unsavory transmittable thing and only an in-grown pube, is horrible.

Sorry about that. Warned you though.

Oh and I will stray into period territory. I'm a bit of a hippy on the quiet, I worry that my periods create a lot of waste each month, down the loo or in the bin. It's bothered me for a while, and then I read on one of the forums I visit about these. I've got one and I'm using it this month for the first time when I get the painters in.

I think I will be quite smug in my environmentally sounder, hippy like, less loo visits than before, earth mother on the blob way.

It may make up for the minge spot misery

2005-07-01T22:55:00.000Z

This myspace lark is quite absorbing, in the same way I manage to get sucked into Big Brother each year.
I know it's horrible, I know it's monstrously mundane, but people and how they act (even if it is an act) facinate me.

I've also had 3 (count 'em) marriage proposals.
Two from African countries ("i decieded to write to you because you are the type of stuff i need...There is nothing that i am looking for that you should accept FRIENDSHIP and that will lead to MARRY" aww bless, but colour me cynical, a visa too maybe?) and one from middle America.
This on a short bio (a lot of which is true but only a very selective portion of me to obfuscate for ex bf reasons) and a picture of a stripper called Honey Holiday I found and saved on tinternet while drunk and cannot re-locate!

I also had a conversation on msn with a young boy who wanted to get to know me "betta". Paraphrased, and not including all his kiddie internet spelling that was mostly vowel free and comprised of letters from the rear end of the alphabet only:

he: hiya, you look sexy, I want to get to know you better.
me: that's not me, read my profile, and I don't like kids, also in my profile.
he: but you look hot.
me: IT'S NOT ME!!!
he: and I'm not a kid, I'm almost 18. I want to meet with you and have some fun.
me: run along, find someone with at least one thing in common with your profile in theirs, and it's STILL not me in that damn picture!!

Also, you'll probably know this, you get bulletins from folk who you've added as friends, and I got this one, don't follow this link if you've just eaten, you're under 18, or if you think cruelty in humour is very very wrong.
Let's just warn you with the fact that I didn't realise the subject of a couple of pictures on here until a hand strayed into the frame. It's not mean to animals though.
I'm quite amused by moderately cruel humour, but in places this goes a little too far (the writer seems a tad misogynistic to me, almost certainly no looker himself).
I'm still spreading it over my bit of the inernet though *holds out hand for slap and judgement*

also, for your delight, delectation, and in the hope someone may know about her or have more pictures than I do, Miss Honey Holiday!

I'll stand by it til the end of time; guys are so predictable!

2005-06-27T22:18:00.000Z

I put up ONE post that contains the words breasts, whip and masochist, and my vivitor stats go through the roof!

I can't help feeling a little sorry for the poor buggers who came here expecting a flash, or some porn.

2005-06-27T18:38:00.000Z

Here is a unique keychain from a Japan-- an eggplant bell in metallic purple with lucky dream signs engraved in it! Over 1" long, this lucky eggplant may bring you luck when attatched to your knapsack, keychain, or pencil case. On one side is Mount Fuji painted on it with "Fuji" written in hiragana. On the other side is a hawk, with the Japanese "taka" above it. It is believed that dreaming one of these three elements will bring the dreamer good fortune--Fuji for beauty, the hawk for courage and the eggplant for bounty, in that order with the best dream being about Mt. Fuji. This tradition goes back to the Edo period of Japan, so carry a little bit of luck with you--and pleasant dreams!

Aubergine dreams!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-06-26T23:41:00.000Z

Oh dear. I caved and signed up on myspace.
I'm still not a 16 year old mentally deficient twat, but i kinda hoped that with full access I could meet a better class of folk. I have 4 friends so far, one of them is jeagermeister, one of them is a guy I just friended because I think he's hot and might be able to tell me good places to go in leeds where my mate lives now.
Apparently it's an aim to get as many friends as you can, an online popularity contest. I'm fucked right away, I think it's going to fall fallow after this weekend of giving it a chance.

I'm horrible anyway, signed up under false id (the ex is on there somewhere, he does a good enough job of stalking me and fucking up my life with his nasty contact attempts without me giving him a key to the door!!) and I've friended people who say they hate liars. I'm not usually, but... aw, but nothing, no excuse.

I'm still not sticking avidly to the damn creepy embarressing thing. I don't think I'm fond enough of taking pictures of my own breasts for myspace.

Although I did scan them as soon as I got a scanner. I managed to line them up wrong, or rather not give any thought to lining them up, and they looked all wonky, both "looking" in different directions. Couldn't stop laughing for days...

But I did nick another quiz, saves me rotting my brain by surfing quizilla.

You're Whip Bettie. You're definitely on the
masochistic side. You like to sport dark colors
and especially black vinyl. Pain is
beauty...and well SEXY! Many see you as a
bitch, but that's okay, you can't always be
around to say thank you :)

Which Bettie Page Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

Homicidal maniacs?

2005-06-25T17:53:00.000Z

Any one know any? I'll give them an address and a description of to to follow away from it.

Either that or i need some other way to make my ex fuck off and leave me be. I found out he still has my old number stored to his phone. The old number for the old phone I don't have anymore, the phone he's been sending obscene messages to for someone else, who does now own the phone, to read.
Having been told what was in them, it seems he's got some other poor cow as his bit on the side now.
I hope she's aware that all she is to him is a bunch of holes to fuck. Sorry to be crude but I hope the poor cow isn't being fooled into thinking he gives a shit about another person but himself, especially a female person.

I just wish he'd update the entry for "worthless dumb whore" in his phone so it's her number instead of my old one, it's embarrassing for the guy who does now own it.

Or, more realistically, I wish a homicidal maniac would find him and, well, do his maniacally homicidal thing. Slowly.

2005-06-23T23:24:00.000Z

I think I must be getting old for jigsaw's to impress me this much, or I need to get more sleep, but I think this is real neat!

lazy lazy give me your answers tooo...

2005-06-23T20:43:00.000Z

You are Jack the Ripper. Yours were some of the
most brutal murders recorded in history--yet
your case is still to this day unsolved. You
came from out of the fog, killed violently and
quickly and disappeared without a trace. Then
for no apparent reason, you satisfy your blood
lust with ever-increasing ferocity, culminating
in the near destruction of your final victim,
and then you vanish from the scene forever. The
perfect ingredients for the perennial thriller.
You are quite the mysteriously demented?

Which Imfamous criminal are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

You Are Tequilla

When you drink, you're serious about getting drunk!
You'll take any shot that's offered up to you...
Even if it tastes like sock sweat!
And you're never afraid of eating the worm.

What alcoholic drink are you?

Can't you tell it's hot as hell here? I'm so heat spazzed that I've been trawling around Myspace thinking of getting an account. Then dusk started to creep in and brought with it my mind and the memory of the fact that I'm not a 16 year old mentally deficient twat, so I'd not have much in common with the majority of folk who are members.

But I still like to nick their quizzes.

2005-06-14T22:37:00.000Z

Crrrreeepy as hell little thing

It's worth watching all of the different variations though.
Wait for the entire movie to load (13.16 Mb), then click the glowing objects.
There's a little story with a couple of different threads behind each, you do have to keep clicking glowing things to progress, and you get choices along the way.

Fucking creepy though.

ETA: even fucking creepier with the sound on!!

2005-06-05T22:07:00.000Z

wide awake and surfing around. I'm bored and down and trying not to be a mess. So seeing these quizzes caught my eye, the miserable goth in me fighting for supremacy and all.

You're Bauhaus, the grandfather's of goth. You
probably don't call yourself a goth...but that
just makes you cooler. Nice boots, by the way
}:)

What Goth Band Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

You're a Denial Goth! You are so not Goth. In
fact you're Post-Punk/Darkwave/Whatever lesser-
known synonym for goth is popular this week.
Give it up, it's obvious you're a Goth.

What kind of Goth would you be?
brought to you by Quizilla

The fact that I'm listening to northern soul right now does take away from the Goth factor. Uplifting though the tunes are, it's still mighty depressing, that may just be me though.

God I'm bored.

I'm switching to the sisters and surfing some more.

2005-06-04T22:21:00.000Z

The bruise is long gone, but it was beautiful, like watching a sunset with all the changing colours, despite it being on my arse (where the sun does actually shine from, funnily enough)

Leeds was great, I got asked out and chatted up left and right! Great confidence booster, despite it being patently obvious that northern lads are just easily impressed and totally shameless flirts.

The date was OK but panned out to nothing. I think it's going to be a while before I can trust people (men) enough so as not to come off cold and distant to them.

My shit of an ex made contact, again. The man is starting to really hack me off now. I wish I'd kept all the emails and messages, so I could go to the police, or the courts, and make him stay away. I just didn't want parts of him sitting around on my computer, in my life.
I think he just wanted me to look at his new myspace page. Typical him, mutton dressed as lamb, trying to flirt with all the young dumb kids on there. Sad pathetic old fucker.

I've managed to find a hair colour thats almost Jessica Rabbit red, but I suspect it'll wash and fade out to ginger, which is no biggy, but not as cool. I just gotta get a corset that moves my entire midrift up into a phenomenal cleavage now, and then I'm set.

Just got in from watching Sin City, which is great, All my favorites, violence, pretty girls and hopeless, fatal, romance.
*sigh* I'd love a man who'd blow his brains out to save my life.
I'd love a few men to just blow their brains out anyway, but that's just silly wishing.
Too many romantic fairytales read to me as a kid. One of my favorite poems my mom used to have to read to me again and again as a kid was The Highwayman.
It fitted my Adam Ant crush, and was one of her favorites too, and an excuse to hide in my room at night to hide from my dad.
Re-reading it now, it may actually explain a lot; tied to the foot of a bed... crikey...

2005-05-05T11:17:00.000Z

The bruise is now scarlette, purple and has a greenish tinge at the edges. I was right, Tiger balm stung like hell, I now have some Arnica cream.

I have a date. Christ knows how I'm going to dress or act or anything. I haven't had a date since the dawn of time. I have a whole week and a half to work myself into a worry over it.

Right now, I'm off to Leeds for much drinking and fun.

2005-05-02T23:29:00.000Z

Just to add, I watched Dr Who.
The Dalek was not nearly as evil as my ex.
I actually quite felt for it.
Actually, I cried a bit, but I am a girl and had time-of-the-month hormones going on there.

2005-05-02T23:16:00.000Z

I'm still hungover from last night and it's just after midnight.
I have a HUGE bruise on my arse (it takes up one whole cheek, that's how huge!!) and a bruise and cut on my arm.
I have a nagging spasm in my right calf from dancing/ pogoing in 5 inch heels.

But I saw the Buzzcocks live and they fucking rocked, so I don't care

The Stranglers headlined and they sucked.
I saw my ex and his new woman. He looked shit, fat and bored, she (I know, I know, nothing against her really but I must crow) is dumpy and middleaged, and I looked hot for a change, slim by miracles of water tablets, crash diets, black clothes, heels and smoke and mirrors.

And I saw the buzzcocks live and they fucking rocked, did I mention that?

I'm off to double check online what to put on bruises of this magnitude, my sister says Tigerbalm, I suspect she's wrong and that that would sting.

Oh and btw, I fell on slippy stairs when only mildly wasted. It was not a total drunken fall.
I have witnesses who've told me this, as I couldn't remember falling hard enough for it to leave my arse black (it is black, and bright blue, almost electric. I'd post pictures, but no-one wants to see that).

I do remember seeing the Buzzcocks live, and they fucking rocked.

lazy post

2005-04-29T19:41:00.000Z

Your Birthdate: March 15

With a birthday on the 15th of any month, you are apt to have really strong attachments to home, family and domestic scene.

The 1 and 5 equaling 6, provide the sort of energy that makes you an excellent parent or teacher.

You are very responsible and capable.

This is an attractive and an attracting influence.

You like harmony in your environment and strive to maintain it.

You tend to learn by observation rather than study and research.

You may like to cook, but you probably don't follow recipes.

This number shows artistic leanings and would certainly support an talents that may be otherwise in your makeup.

You're a very generous and giving person, but perhaps a bit stubborn in ways.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean?

Hmmm, not sure on that, aprt from not following recipies.

2005-04-25T19:24:00.000Z

nothing.she was drunk.talking shit and upsetting me.old people get like that sometimes.feel a bit stupid now i've talked to my sister. sorry for wasting your time.wouldn't have got in contact otherwise.am extremely angry with her (and myself).hope all is ok and sorry for this.a bit like the time you had to get in touch over other people talking shite and putting you in a situation where you had to get in contact to put things straight.forget about it.

I couldn't not email him, I asked what I was supposed to do, he sent that.
Fucking knew it, fucking twat.
I sincerely doubt it came from his mother, I know now, reading this that it was one of his lame attempts at contact and emotional blackmail.

He knows as well as I do that we're bound to bump into one another at this big gig on Mayday, I think he may want to reduce the likely hood of a "scene", which he knows he can do by staying the fuck away from me.

The time he's talking about, by the way, when others were talking shite and I had to contact him to put things straight, was on my old blog, the reason I shut it down in fact.
An old "friend" posted his email address in a comment after I'd spent the ENTIRE blog recounting how he fucked me over (I was even more bitter and hostile back then) and someone reading it sent him a (deservedly) flamey email. He contacted me to rant about me posting his mail address on the web (bollocks) and what he's calling my getting in contact was in fact telling him what had actually happened and to fuck off. Again.

I blame the daleks, he's watched doctor who on saturday night and got all nostalgic, that's what it is. I thought of him when I saw the dalek teaser for next week too, I thought,
"that dalek wants to wipe out the human race, he's still not as much of a cunt as my ex."