ShysterBall

Jason Bay > Manny Ramirez

2008-10-06T11:19:00.000-04:00

If you really want to know the difference between Jason Bay and Manny Ramirez, you may want to check out my short post on the subject over at FanHouse.

Old School

2008-10-06T06:35:00.000-04:00

The Phillies beat the Brewers and the Dodgers beat the Cubs over the weekend, and that sets up an old school NLCS. Let's do the hustle down memory lane, shall we?

1977: The Phillies won their second straight NL East title. The Dodgers were making their first playoff appearance in three years, and their first ever postseason appearance under Tommy Lasorda. A pitcher's duel that wasn't -- both Steve Carlton and Tommy John got beat up -- the Phillies took game 1, which was their first postseason victory since Game 1 of the 1915 World Series, having lost games 2-6 that year, and then being been swept out of the 1950 World Series by the Yankees and the 1976 NLCS by the Big Red Machine. The Dodgers regrouped, however, winning the final three games behind some big hits by series MVP Dusty Baker, some questionable defense by Greg Luzinski, a minor meltdown by Gene Garber, and then a shutdown performance by Tommy John which atoned for Game 1.

1978: Steve Carlton wasn't available to pitch until Game 3, by which time the Phils were already down 2-0 and thus all-but-eliminated. Lefty pitched a complete game and hit a three run homer in that one, but unfortunately he couldn't go on zero days' rest the next day, and Los Angeles took it, winning the game following two uncharacteristic Garry Maddox blunders in centerfield on consecutive plays in the bottom of the 10th inning. As was the case the year before, L.A. would go on to lose to the Yankees in the World Series.

1983: During the regular season. the Dodgers beat the Phillies 11 out of the 12 times they met. Just like this year, however, what happened in the postseason didn't matter in 1983 either, as the Phillies won the series 3-1. The only scoring in Game 1 came on a Mike Schmidt homer which Carlton and Al Holland made hold up. The Dodgers took game two, again with help from a Garry Maddox error (what was with Maddox in the playoffs?), but series MVP Gary Matthews took control in games three and four to vault the Phillies into the World Series were they would ultimately be cut down by the Orioles.

I have no idea what the 2008 NLCS will hold, but I'll go out on a limb and predict that (a) Garry Maddox's defense will not be a factor; (b) three wins will not be enough to make it to the World Series this time; and (c) whoever wins this one will lose once again to the American League team.

Popcorn! Peanuts!

2008-10-06T06:25:00.001-04:00

Ballpark vendors are getting a makeover.

TMI

2008-10-06T05:49:00.003-04:00

A story on the magical effect of the "blackout" by White Sox fans during the past couple of games. Money quote:

"It makes a nice community, builds camaraderie," said Christine Swiderski, of the Garfield Ridge neighborhood. Swiderski was wearing black eyeliner and face paint, a black headband, a black Sox pullover, black pants and black skivvies. "Everyone was so into the game."

How, exactly, did the reporter know that Ms. Swiderski was weaing black underwear, and how, exactly, did Ms. Swiderski's black underwear help the Sox?

Camaraderie indeed.

Marchman on the March

2008-10-06T05:44:00.001-04:00

For those of you concerned about the fate of Tim Marchman -- ace columnist for the now defunct New York Sun -- please be advised that he is alive and well and writing playoff columns for the Wall Street Journal.

Just Another Night in Galveston

2008-10-06T05:38:00.002-04:00

A 19 year-old drunk, his father, a FEMA coordinator, and Astros' starter Brandon Backe are involved in a mini-riot, and all I can think when I read the article is what on Earth people are doing holding a wedding in Galveston, Texas so soon after the hurricane came through:

During the brawl, Backe was told by police to back away. He refused, and police attempted to handcuff him, the report said. Backe struggled with officers. One officer stated in the report that he hit Backe twice in the face before handcuffing him. The officer also reported that Backe smelled of alcohol and had bloodshot eyes. Both the officer and Backe sustained minor injuries during the fight, according to the police report.

I think Backe should sue for violation of his civil rights. After all, given his 6.05 ERA this year, that cop probably came into the joint knowing he was going to hit Backe.

All Hail Bud!

2008-10-06T00:01:00.000-04:00

Bud Selig gets a standing O for throwing out the first pitch yesterday:

Already on its feet for the national anthem, the sellout crowd at Miller Park gave Selig a raucous ovation — complete with clattering Thunder Stix — as he walked onto the field. Selig stopped a few feet in front of the mound, and overhanded a respectable throw over the plate to backup catcher Mike Rivera. Selig thrust his arms into the air and grinned as fans applauded and whistled in appreciation. He high-fived Attanasio before disappearing into the Brewers' dugout.

I suppose a small handful of the folks on hand remembered how hard Selig worked it just to get Milwaukee that team back in the day, and from their point of view he no doubt deserves that ovation.

As for the rest of them? I can only assume that the gates to the stadium and the beer taps inside opened at 8AM and that they were all suffering from that irrational euphoria that only alcohol can bring. Under those circumstances, cheering loudly for Bud Selig is not unlike pounding one's fist and doing the air guitar solo to Journey's "Don't Stop Believing" after downing a half dozen Miller Lites in a suburban strip mall night club.

Talking Past One Another

2008-10-06T00:00:00.000-04:00

On Page 3 of the sports section of yesterday's New York Times appeared a story about how statistical sinkholes at second base, the corner outfield positions, and everywhere except Johan Santana's place on the pitching staff were what ultimately sunk the Mets.

On Page 4 of the sports section of yesterday's New York Times appeared a story about how Jerry Manuel doesn't want to hear about how the statistical performances of his second baseman, corner outfielders, and non-Santana pitchers were what ultimately sunk the Mets. He wants to focus on intangibles and situational hitting, and all of the scrappy little things that the stat guys can't quantify. In fact, he even implies that he'd be more than happy with a sink hole at second base as long as he hustles a bit.

Query: is it not possible for a good player to possess good intangibles? Couldn't marrying that up be a total chocolate-in-my-peanut butter moment for the Mets?

(thanks to reader Scott M for noticing this curious combination of stories in yesterday's Times)

Dodgers 3, Cubs 1

2008-10-05T08:46:00.003-04:00

See you in 2108.

I have never met a Cubs fan I haven't liked, so I feel kind of bad for them this morning. But anything that makes Jim Belushi cry is probably, on balance, a good thing for the planet.

Quote of the Day

2008-10-03T21:37:00.003-04:00

In retrospect balancing the book-writing, full-time at Deadspin, a small law practice, and a wife and an 8 month old son, was an incredibly dumb feat to undertake.

-- Clay Travis, now part-time Deadspin blogger, upon realizing that he simply can't do it all.

As a guy writing ShysterBall full-time, mostly failing at being a part time FanHouse blogger, sorta working on two proto-book projects, and trying to hold my own at a largish law firm while trying to find time for my wife, four year-old daughter, and three year-old son, I can relate.

Great Moments in Priorities

2008-10-03T15:16:00.003-04:00

Sure, you're covering the debates, but that doesn't mean you can't keep your eyes on the important contests.

That's Jeffrey Toobin's laptop, by the way. He's a lawyer. We're great at multitasking.

(thanks to Mike McClary at the Daily Fungo for the heads up)

The Pitch

2008-10-03T11:31:00.003-04:00

This morning's story about the MLB Network had me thinking of the programming we're likely to see there and, more to the point, the kind of programming I'd like to see there. Pete Toms wrote a comment to that post expressing interest in the Arizona Fall League and international baseball events like the WBC and the Carribean Series. I'd probably watch some of that, but I have to be honest and say that my interests skew more towards actual MLB action. Upshot: if MLB Network were to play pre-1990 games in their entirety -- regular old games, not just World Series or otherwise notable games -- I would probably tune in and rip off the dial.

But obviously they are going to need more, and I have an idea that I'm willing to share for the low, low price of absolutely free: A baseball travel show that after approximately seven seconds of thought, I will tentatively title "Road Trip."

The premise: a half hour travel show in which our intrepid host is plopped down in a Major League city for a weekend. The centerpiece of each show, obviously, is to go to a game or three, giving viewers the taste of the Los Angeles Dodgers experience or the Kansas City Royals experience, or whatever. He -- along with a local contact/friend/guide perhaps -- will visit the best places to hang out before and after the games. He'll find the best real world (i.e. non-VIP) seats and talk about the stadium and stuff. Overall, he'll do his best to convey the history, flavor, and general milieu of a given team, its park, its fans, and its city.

If this sounds somewhat familiar to some of you cable geeks, it's because what I'm basically picturing is Anthony Bourdain's "No Reservations" show, but for baseball.

In my mind the key to that show's success -- and what makes it different from any other travel show -- is that there is a distinct editorial voice at the center. Unlike your usual vapid hostbot, Bourdain has strong opinions about the places he's going before he goes there and spends each show trying to figure out the extent to which those opinions are valid, stupid, or something in between. He'll eschew the cliche landmarks and experiences hyped by the local visitor's bureau and attempt to get the feel of a place on the street level and through the eyes of the locals.

I think such a thing could be done with baseball. I'm reminded of a weekend I spent in southern California last year, in which I went to Dodger Stadium with a college roommate and Petco with my brother over the course of a weekend. Neither of my game experiences followed the cliched storylines that spring to mind when you think about those places. For example, in Los Angeles, we got to Dodger Stadium early and stayed late. Surprisingly enough, so did many others. In the almost universal effort to paint L.A. as apathy central, their stories are never told. Throw in some trips to off the beaten path Dodger fan hangouts, provide a brief lesson about the largely and shamefully unknown history of Chavez Ravine, and splash in some prologue and epilogue about where Los Angeles fits in the baseball universe, and you have yourself a show. Multiply that by 30 teams and you have a couple of seasons. Sprinkle in some episodes about Cooperstown, some select minor league city experiences, and one-offs like baseball card shows and the SABR convention and you have at least another season's worth. If the thing does well you can justify a trip to Japan and other places.

Other random thoughts:

Critical to this show's success would be that it not come off as some paid advertisement. Sure, if MLB is airing the thing the production would have to observe some prudent limits -- for example, you couldn't get away with visiting an Orioles bar where Peter Angelos is hung in effigy -- but you would want to make sure that you conveyed an accurate portrait of both the joys and frustrations each team's city and supporters experience by virtue of their fandom. I hate the word "edgy," but it needs to err on that side of things;

Bourdain's shows are always improved by a local guest or fixer that either actually provides local insight, or at the very least serves as a foil or comic relief. If I were producing the show, I'd have my host hook up with particularly knowledgeable local fans. Maybe even a blogger. Visiting Seattle? Meet up with Zumsteg and Cameron and let them guide the viewers through. San Diego? How about Geoff Young? I'm sure guys like that could show the host a side of Mariners and Padre fandom that you simply don't get in the normal course of things.

This was mentioned before, but your host would have to be a guy with a strong point of view. You can't have some warmed over local news personality doing it. It would have to be someone who could explain the history, nature, and fanbase of Team X in City Y in knowledgeable and colorful terms while simultaneously serving as a pair of eyes the viewing audience could identify with. Ultimately, you'd want the viewer to wish he was on the trip with the host, hanging out with him, and going to the places he's going.

I think you get the idea. Hopefully someone at MLB TV has had the same idea and is working on something like that.

If not, well, I'm generally free between 2009 and 2012, and I'm taking calls.

My Readers Are Awesome

2008-10-03T09:00:00.000-04:00

I have a reader named Ben Ailinger, and Ben is married to a swell dame named Katie. Katie wrote me yesterday to tell me that she and Ben are running a half marathon in honor of their friend Larry Maxick, who passed away from non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma two months ago and, of course, to raise money for the Leukemia & Lymphoma Society. Ben and Katie's fundraising page -- sporting a nice pic of the dashing couple as well -- is here.

For those of you not familiar, The Leukemia & Lymphoma Society's Team in Training program is a, well, a training program to get people geared up to run, walk, or roll in marathons, half-marathons, triathlons, and other endurance events. In exchange for the training, the participants raise money for research for a cure for blood cancers like leukemia, lymphoma and myeloma. The program has been around for 20 years now, and has raised nearly a billion bucks. I've had many friends participate in TNT, and every one of them has found the experience to be fulfilling in multiple ways. When you're mixing service to a good cause with getting your butt off the couch and getting healthy, how can it not be.

So if you have time today -- and if you're here you certainly have time to spend -- stop by Ben and Katie's site to make a donation, offer support, or to provide some combination of the two.

For what it's worth . . .

2008-10-03T05:58:00.001-04:00

I'm not sayin' this kind of thing is necessarily newsworthy. I'm just sayin' that with both New York teams out of the playoffs, there are a lot of bored Post, Daily News, and Newsday writers looking for content right now, and that people like A-Rod should probably look over their shoulder when they're out and about.

Very Superstitious

2008-10-03T05:52:00.000-04:00

Some smart folks have figured out what superstition is all about, and make what sounds like a pretty astute observation:

In baseball, experts believe superstition and ritual pop up most often around tasks where players have the least control. Batters and pitchers often develop elaborate preparation routines, in part because their success often depends on random factors such as where a fly ball lands or whether the batter anticipates a pitch correctly. Anthropologist George Gmelch once wrote of a pitcher who insisted on washing his hands after every inning in which he gave up a run.

Fielders, by contrast, maintain few rituals—perhaps because a pro player's success in fielding a ball is so high.

"Unlike hitting and pitching, a fielder has almost complete control over the outcome of his performance," Gmelch wrote in a 2000 article called "Baseball Magic." "He knows that, in better than 9.7 times out of 10, he will execute his task flawlessly. With odds like that there is little need for ritual."

Yeah, but how does that account for the live rooster needed to take the curse off of Jose's glove?

MLB Network Ready To Drop

2008-10-03T05:40:00.000-04:00

The New York Times has the most substantive article I've seen yet about the MLB Network. The in-season centerpiece:

The architectural plans for the facility look lavish, with two enormous studios (one is designed to look like a ballpark). But the network will be judged by its programming, including the centerpiece “MLB Tonight” studio program, which during the season will offer updates, live game look-ins and wrap-ups from 7 p.m. until at least 1 a.m. Eastern.

Certainly nothing beats watching the game itself, but if you're just looking to get the overview and flavor of what's going on in the league every night, that sounds like a pretty neat show. Unless they either (a) staff that thing with utterly grating personalities; or (b) try to give it some artificially-fast pacing in the interest of creating "excitement," I'm having a hard time seeing how that wouldn't be infinitely preferable to ESPN's Baseball Tonight. As for the first point:

The roster of commentators is expected to include Harold Reynolds and Al Leiter, but one of Petitti’s tasks will be to hire someone to be the undisputed voice of the network.

I implore you MLB TV: Avoid the temptation to go with an empty suit with a pedigree of nepotism as opposed to merit. No Chip Caray. No Joe Buck. No Ernie Johnson Jr. Baseball fans don't want a mere pleasant looking studio host. Get someone who can talk baseball up, down, and sideways, even if his tones are less than perfectly dulcet and his chin less than perfectly square.

And That Happened

2008-10-03T05:18:00.000-04:00

I know I said I was done with this for the year, but between driving back home from Detroit, tending to a barfing three year-old, and then watching the debate, I ended up missing all of the games yesterday. The least I can do, then, is run 'em down all quick-like:

Dodgers 10, Cubs 3: The Cubs sure picked the wrong time to play their worst baseball, huh?

Phillies 5, Brewers 2: If you had told Dale Sveum before the game that Ryan Howard, Chase Utley, and Pat Burrell would combine to go 0-10 with seven strikeouts, he would have felt pretty darn good about his team's chances. That's numbers for you.

Rays 6, White Sox 4: So much for youthful inexperience. Ozzie Guillen on Longoria: "This guy is a star. He's going to be an outstanding ballplayer. You see his face on the field, and you just know he's going to be a great, great player." Man, I wish that loose cannon would quit throwing verbal bombs like that. He's a total embarrassment.

Omar Extended

2008-10-02T12:57:00.002-04:00

Minaya gets his extension. Three years with some option years, and he now probably makes north of a million a year.

It's obvious that priority number one in Queens is to restructure the bullpen. There are many ways to go about doing that. If you're kind of desperate, you can pay a ton of money for arms who did well last year, hoping that the inherently misleading sample sizes of relievers will serve as good predictors for how they'll do next year (we'll call this the Chris Hammond approach). You can also try to mix a bunch of scrap metal together and hope it forms Voltron. Of course you can split the difference too.

I don't know that anyone has a monopoly on wisdom when it comes to putting a bullpen together, but one tends to use the Chris Hammond approach if they feel particularly pressured to fix a bullpen problem yesterday. Now that Omar has all kinds of job security, one wonders if he's going to take that tack and throw a billion dollars at K-Rod, or if instead, he's going to take a couple of weeks to think about ways to address the problem in a more sophisticated manner.

Paging Dick Pole

2008-10-02T11:22:00.002-04:00

I wasn't the only one who stayed up late to watch the Sox game last night. Russ Smith did too, and today he extends some pointed comments at TBS' penis-centered advertising package.

Penis.

Quality vs. Quantity

2008-10-02T11:17:00.000-04:00

That's the big question for every blogger, really. Should I do one or two huge substantive posts or seven quick hits? Should I run top 10 lists or embed viral video in order to drive traffic, or should I set myself up as some Wise Voice who only speaks when there is something worth being said? In an ideal world I'd put up ten thickly substantive posts a day, but that obviously doesn't happen. In reality, I go back and forth on that kind of stuff depending upon how busy I am and what the news dictates.

Forgive the meta-moment, but here's some insight into those issues from the blogger's point of view.

And yes, it's a Slate article. Yeah, I slagged on them yesterday, but I was probably being a bit overbroad. There's a lot of content over there. Some is good. Some isn't. It's just like anyplace else.

From The Desk of Brian Sabean

2008-10-02T09:55:00.000-04:00

The Giants aren't going to bring back Omar Vizquel. Word on the street is that they think he's too green and inexperienced. They're currently in talks with Arky Vaughan's people.

More significantly, they may be sniffing around Sabathia:

Rather than weaken the rotation, the Giants might take one bold move to strengthen it. There are indications the Giants plan to investigate the Hope Diamond of free-agent pitchers this winter, CC Sabathia, to gauge his interest in returning to his native Bay Area . . .

. . . Sabathia is going to command a massive contract, too, but could be the one starter worth the millions he gets. His signing also could provide Sabean the flexibility to move other pitchers for offense.

With the understanding that Sabathia is not Barry Zito, Does Brian Sabean really have the political capital to bring in another nine-figure free agent starting pitcher? I can't imagine he does, but then again, there's a lot about what happens in the Giants' front office I don't understand.

Balancing The Schedule

2008-10-02T08:13:00.002-04:00

King Kaufman has some fun by figuring out who got fat on their own division this year and who didn't and reimagining the standings accordingly. The takeaway: don't slag on the Angels for getting fat on the Mariners and A's.

(thanks to reader Chris Simonds for the link)

ESPN America

2008-10-02T08:10:00.001-04:00

That NASN feed I was watching for the liveblog last night? Next year it will be known as ESPN America. Sounds dramatic, no?

Brother, Can You Spare a Dime?

2008-10-02T07:16:00.002-04:00

Attendance dropped 1.1 percent in 2008. As others have noted, revenue numbers are what matter more, and it's not at all clear yet if that has gone down as much it at all.

Of course, based on both the recent financial apocalypse and the notion that baseball sometimes lags a year when a downturn comes, 2009 may be where the rubber really hits the road.

Red Sox-Angels Liveblog

2008-10-02T01:23:00.002-04:00

Don't let anyone tell you that they're more dedicated to blogging baseball than I am. If they say so, they're lying. Here's the deal:

I'm in a crappy hotel in Detroit that doesn't carry TBS, most likely because the joint is run by communists. I was prepared to give up on any baseball -- my quasi-estranged grandmother lives around here somewhere and I was even thinking of stopping in -- but a wonderful reader named Enrique shot me a link to NASN's streaming coverage so sorry Grandma. The signal: 'tis not so deep as a well, nor so wide as a church-door; but 'tis enough,'twill serve.

I may fall asleep, or my connection may crap out, but we're going to give this baby a shot. I'll be keeping it to this single post, and I'll try to refresh after every half inning or so, so anyone following this should think about refreshing occasionally too. For those of you with lives, I'll have it all up in-full tomorrow morning.

Play Ball!

Pregame Stuff

Cole Hamels was pretty tough in the first game and the Dodgers big bats were pretty tough in the second. I really don't care who wins the Dodgers-Cubs series, but it was nice to see Greg Maddux pitch in the postseason, even if it was basically garbage time. Going forward, man, as if Carlos Zambrano and CC Sabathia didn't have the weight of the world on their shoulders already . . .

Can I tell you how happy I am to see Eckersley still rocking the mullet after all of these years? It's the greatest bit of outmoded hairstyle dedication I've seen since Robert Reed and his perm died back in 1992. As for the rest of the studio team, I am a huge Curtis Granderson fan -- I actually like his ESPN blog quite a bit -- so I'm happy to see him there.

Ah, Chip Caray and Buck Martinez. I suppose it wouldn't be the worst thing in the world for my jerry-rigged game broadcast to crash out now.

Top of the 1st

Wasn't TBS showing OBP in players' stat lines during the season and in last year's playoffs? Why not now? [thanks for noting the error, Marksmith; there will be many, I'm sure].

This game is three minutes old, and Martinez has used the word "stroke" three times already.

Bottom of the 1st

Maybe I'm not supposed to ask this, but how come some people were giving the Red Sox crap a couple of weeks ago for being such a White team, while no one tends to mention just how many African-Americans/Black Hispanics play for the Angels? If you're going to criticize such things, shouldn't you give credit where it is due too?

I never, ever get to see the Angels back here in the Midwest, so I tend not to see much of Vlad until the playoffs come around. I'm guessing his weight gain has been gradual, but since I haven't really seen him since last fall, he looks like he has gotten fat overnight.

Buck Martinez is trying to give away the Angels' signs. I'm sure they appreciate that.

Top of the 2nd

Lackey sets 'em down easily. If anyone cares, my feed freezes up about every other batter. I still have audio in real time, but I'm missing some video. For purposes of the liveblog part of me is hoping that this is a really exciting game, but since I may miss some of it, I hope nothing really interesting happens.

Bottom of the 2nd

NASN -- who is providing my video feed -- is owned by ESPN, so I have the odd combo of the TBS broadcast with the standard ESPN crawl along the bottom of the screen. It's all tennis and basketball and stuff. Sahreef Abdur-Rahim has been hired as an assistant coach for the Kings, if anyone cares.

Someone must have told these guys that I have to work in the morning, because they're flying through it so far. Still, I'd like to see something happen.

Top of the 3rd

I'm sure Theo and Bill James and all of the folks in the Red Sox front office love to see a sacrifice bunt attempt in a 0-0 game in the 3rd inning.

Lowrie crushes Aybar to break up the double play. I hate collisions at the plate, but for some reason I don't mind seeing shortstops and second basemen taken out. I realize it makes no sense.

Ellsbury is somewhat fast.

Chip says that both teams want to "force the issue offensively." Stockton said something to that effect in the Dodgers-Cubs game. I don't know what that means. They all want to score a lot of runs, right?

Bottom of the 3rd

Since I have NASN instead of TBS, I don't have any Frank TV ads, but I do get some annoying commercials for "Around The Horn," directed at the European audience. They feature Mariotti and Woody Paige and Co. talking about Benny Hill and otherwise insulting their European audience. Note to ESPN brass: you may want to rethink that campaign.

Teixeira is way behind on a fastball, so Martinez says that Lester needs to throw more heat. My feeble little brain thinks "wait, if Teixeira is behind on fastballs, won't he really try to crank up the swing so as to catch up? Throw junk!" Lester and Varitek must be listening to me because he throws two straight looping curves and strikes out Teixeira. I totally should have a job in baseball.

Jed Lowrie boots one. Ooops. Let's see if Torii Hunter makes him pay . . .

. . . Yep! Hunter singles, Anderson scores.

Top of the 4th

I'll give this to Martinez: it hadn't occurred to me that your hip might have a labrum too due to the presence of a ball-and-socket joint. There. I learned something tonight.

For those of you -- including you, Michael Stoner -- who may want this feed at another time (like, at work) here is the link I'm using right now:

http://www.ustream.tv/videoplayerpopup/channel/302816.

I don't know if that will be the same for other games going forward or not. If it doesn't work, you may just try to go to NASN's (North American Sports Network) website and look for the streaming video.

Bottom of the 4th

Remember the fuss at the beginning of the season about how Tito was going to have to start wearing a uniform top under his little warmup jacket? I don't think he's wearing one. Somebody gonna fine him, or have we forgotten about that petty bit of business?

A couple of readers have noticed that Scott Boras is standing right behind home plate in that little VIP box/dugout thingie. I think I speak for all of us when I say that I am hoping against hope for (a) a hard foul ball straight back off the bat of Vlad; and (b) mesh failure.

Top of the 5th

The crawl is showing hockey scores. They have to be preseason, right? Hockey can't be starting yet, can it? The last season just ended. And they say that baseball season is long.

Again, let me note that Ellsbury has some adequate speed. Beats the bunt, then swipes second.

But no damage done. Lackey looks tough.

Bottom of the 5th

Is Martinez saying that the Red Sox were spreading false rumors about Teixeira when they drafted him back in 1998? I think that's what he was saying.

Lester gives up back to back singles to Teixeira and Guererro, but then its all diffused with a tapper back to the mound from Hunter. I like pitchers' duels, but sometimes they give me this weird, dissonant feeling in which built-up tension is never properly resolved. I can't decide if that in and of itself is a good thing or not.

Top of the 6th

Ortiz swings on the first pitch and pops it straight up. He winced and thrashed a bit when he did it, and for a second I thought he messed up his wrist again, but I guess he was just mad.

Jason Bay looked really bad tonight until he yanked that fastball over the fence. Boom! It's 2-1.

Bottom of the 6th

Lester strikes out the side. Strike three on Gary Matthews was about six inches low, but hey, whaddaya gonna do?

Top of the 7th

Lowrie's check swing strikeout was questionable. Must have been a makeup call for the Matthewes "strike." Oh wait, umps never do that.

You know you've had a good game from both starters when you see guys warming up in the bullpen and go "aw, man."

Wow, Matthews -- who ain't in there for his bat -- totally woofs a liner to right from Ellsbury, and the ball rolls to the wall. He's lucky Ellsbury didn't make it all the way home. Martinez says he lost it in the lights, but he looked all off kilter from the beginning of the play.

And that's it for Lackey. Am I the only one who still can't get his mind around the idea of Darren Oliver being a good reliever? I know he's been serviceable in that role for a couple of years now, but I still think of him giving up lots of runs as a Rangers' starter whenever I see him.

But no, he's good. He really is.

Bottom of the 7th

Lester is getting stronger as the game goes on. He's simply dealing. He's also probably done, given that he's around 120 pitches now.

Top of the 8th

Jason Bay hits a double as, it seems, most of Europe is starting to wake up and watch this video feed themselves, because the locking up and buffering is getting worse. I don't think I've missed anything, but this is getting somewhat annoying.

But not too annoying. I mean, even choppy baseball has made me mostly forget about how mad I was earlier tonight when I thought I'd have nada, and I haven't thought much about the Great Depression v. 2.0 for almost eight hours.

Bottom of the 8th

Teixeira, Guerrero, and Hunter are up this inning. It seems that if they're going to break through, they'll need to do it now. If they don't, the bottom of the order is going to have to rally against Papelbon, right?

Holy Crap! Did I mention that Ellsbury is fast? Awesome play by Ellsbury.

Wow. Can Guerrero even run anymore? Nailed at third as he looked like Refrigerator Perry trying to score a touchdown or something.

Lost chances, man. Lost chances.

Top of the 9th

What's the statute of limitations of promoting someone as an Academy Award winner? Don't get me wrong: I like Timothy Hutton -- I even liked Turk 182 -- but to promote his new show as starring "Academy Award winner Timothy Hutoon" isn't exactly truthful, even if it is technically accurate. Does Tatum O'Neal get that billing when she's arrested?

Get the small-ball Red Sox! They got 'em on, got 'em over, and got 'em in. Chip Caray is quite happy about this, because like so many other broadcasters, he was somehow taught that a "manufactured" run is worth more than a homer.

More insurance as Ortiz goes up the middle, and this game is grinding to a halt, both in real time and on my little video feed, which is all but toast now. Really, it's like having halting radio at this point.

Bottom of the 9th

I was going to quit early, but screw it: Papelbon is on with a three-run lead. I'm not seeing a comeback here, so this should end pretty quickly. I've had shorter night's sleep.

There's one.

There's a hit. Hurm.

There's two.

Closeup of Vlad. He's still slowing down from that lumbering run into third base in the eighth.

Strikeout.

And that, as they say, is that. This was your standard Red Sox playoff game, wasn't it? It was about three and a half hours of slow, grinding attrition. They poked hits through when they needed to. They got to relievers they shouldn't have gotten to. They're the champs. What can you say?

As for me, this was the first and probably the last time I try to liveblog from streaming video. Like I said before, it was better than nothing -- and because I'm in a hotel in Greater Beruit, it was this or nothing -- but it is not ideal. Tomorrow night I'm back to my HDTV, my Eames lounge chair, and the comforts of home.

Night all.