c'est la vie

the middle...

2006-06-06T00:36:00.000-04:00

Following our trip to the beach on Tuesday, Bryce and I decided it was time to start looking for a suit for him to wear at the wedding - that turned out to be a lengthy task, and so we turned it into a trip to the city as well, which allowed me to do some shopping and see Melbourne again. It was a lot of fun, and now I know much more about suits than I did before (which was basically nothing).

Here is Bourke Street Mall where no cars are allowed and pedestrians rule the street except for the occasional tram:

A musician performing, but the real star was the old gentleman dancing away:

One of the historic shopping arcades in Melbourne's CBD:

The Royal Exhibition Centre at the Carlton Gardens:

In the end we did find Bryce a lovely suit and I got to see a bit more of my other home away from home!

beach day - Tuesday May 30

2006-05-31T21:15:00.000-04:00

aerochuting: the world's next olympic sport?

2006-05-28T01:23:00.000-04:00

Yesterday I went Aerochuting. What is that, you ask? Picture a go-kart with a large propellor on the back and a parachute on the top that allows you to fly. The whole idea still makes me chuckle, but it was actually really fun. Bryce's dad has taken this up as his new hobby and is in the process of getting his full license, so I flew with his instructor Steve. It's actually pretty cold here, and I was grateful for the snowsuit they gave me to wear, because being a few hundred feet above the ground creates a significant drop in temp.

Here I am looking like the Michelin Man (or from a scene from Top Gun? No?):

Just before takeoff:

Taking off:

and finally, flying high! :

the beginning...

2006-05-28T00:15:00.000-04:00

Firstly I'd like to start this post by congratulating my cousin Jen and her husband on the first addition to their family - a beautiful baby girl named Jamie Lynne Matto! I look forward to meeting her upon my return to Toronto.

So... the flight from Toronto to LA was boring - they played a bad movie and wanted to charge me $2 for a headset to hear it, so I chose to stare out the window instead. I think my decision was the better one too, since I could actually trace our route across the states', and thereby do a backwards version of my 2004 roadtrip with Bryce. We passed over Chicago, then Des Moines, Omaha, Lincoln Nebraska (yeehaw - I love the word Nebraska), then south over Colorado, Utah, over the Grand Canyon (it was sunset by the time we passed over and it was lovely to see again!), then west over California into LA.

I called my grandparents from LAX but could only talk a short while since my cell phone's roaming fees are really expensive - but it was worth it to speak to them again. I tried getting a calling card from one of the airport's kiosks, but they were $10 for 30 minutes, even for Orange County, and 11 of those minutes were taken away as a 'user charge'. Figures. I felt really guilty being so close - maybe a 45 min drive from them - and yet there wasn't an opportunity for me to see them. It's the first time I've been to California (albeit briefly) and not seen any of my family. :(

Waiting for the Qantas flight to Melbourne felt like forever. Firstly I was so worried that LAX was going to lose my luggage since I had to change terminals and that airport is so busy. Then there was only 1 food kiosk in the entire terminal once you checked in. 1 food kiosk for the international flight terminal!!! Maybe they figure we'll be fed fairly well during the flight, I don't know. The flight itself was better than I had anticipated - the movies were descent, there was an extra seat between me and another passenger, and there were no screaming kids or people with colds nearby. The time did drag on, however: after falling asleep, taking off, waking up and eating a meal, watching an entire movie and sleeping for about 4 hours, there was still 9 hours left in the flight!

After being held at immigration for a while as the officials scratched their heads in regards to me (they couldn't come up with any other reason than my middle initial wasn't written on my Visa, so they had to clarify things for about 10-15 mins... sure...), I was able to wait another 30 minutes for luggage delays (yes, mine did arrive) and go through security / customs. Apparantly the rules have changed since I last arrived in Australia - they now send all luggage through the x-rays to see if what you wrote on your customs form is accurate to what you are bringing into the country. Would they be able to spot an apple in my bags if I said I didn't bring in any fruit? Not sure, but these Aussies are thorough!

It was so nice to see Bryce again after almost 5 months since our January visit - it's even more exciting to see him now since we're finally able to enjoy our engagement in person, instead of doing the long distance thing. The first order of business: shopping! ;) Next item on the list: a long nap. I woke up to the sound of Bryce's neighbours coming over to see me - I'm sure I looked positively stunning with my messy hair (ok, messier than the normal messiness), and inability to focus for about 10 minutes. In many ways it fels as though I never left Australia - I can remember where the shops are, general directions, road rules, etc. The only thing I found funny to get re-acquainted to was the slang - fair dinkum, tucker, etc. Silly Aussies...

Instead of going up to the mountains to a cabin as planned (it's winter here, and as much as I love snow...), we decided to go and see some of my favourite places nearby. First we went on a hike in the Dandenong hill ranges about 20 minutes away from Bryce's house:

A cool fern shot:

We then went on a drive through the Yarra Valley wine region and stopped at Badger's Creek (same place we took Haran when he was out last year). We walked around and Bryce took some water shots with his new camera, and then he proposed to me 'properly' with a ring and everything! I was actually surpised, since I didn't think he'd do it for several more days, but I'm certainly not complaining! :)

Yarra Valley:

Badger's Creek, pre-proposal: ;)

The Black Spur region:

one more day

2006-05-22T14:32:00.000-04:00

I'm at work right now and can't wait to get home and start packing (late, as per usual) for my trip to Australia!!! I leave Tuesday afternoon and get back on June 7th - only 2 weeks I know, but I can't take any more vacation time at the moment because of certain events taking place at the end of the summer. I'm really happy that I'll be able to see Bryce, his family, and Australia again so soon after leaving (it's been a little over 9 months now). It has felt like a really long time in terms of seeing Bryce of course (2 weeks of the past 9 months), but I hadn't expected to return to Oz for at least another 6months to 1 year. Oh well - I'm certainly not complaining!!

I'll try to post photos of new and interesting things so that I won't repeat my earlier blog entries - I'm sure I won't have any trouble finding such things to post.

See you all again soon, and this time I'll have my other half with me too!!! ;)

a little bit of Australia

2006-05-15T19:06:00.000-04:00

Bryce's cousin Clare was here this past weekend for a short, but excellent, visit. It was so nice to see Clare again, as I haven't spent a great deal of time with her since I was living with her in Sydney in 2004. I had forgotten how well we get along! Saturday was spent doing touristy things around the city, which was surprisingly fun since I hadn't done that in a long time. We walked around downtown, stopping at the CN tower / Skydome (Roger's Centre, whatever), King St, Spadina, Queen St (aka shopping!!), the Eaton Centre (more shopping), and then down to the Distillery District which I had never visited before. It's a neat place, but still has a lot of space in which to grow. Saturday night we headed to the Panorama bar at the top of the Manulife Centre so that Clare could have a good view of the city, since going up to the top of the CN Tower has become a little too pricey. It was fun, but cold as we were out on the patio.

Sunday was spent relaxing and going out for lunch with my mom and sister (Clare has now met her future aunt and cousin-in-law... he he), and then she was off to Calgary to do a 5 day tour through the Rockies. It seems that every member of Bryce's family will have seen the Rockies by September, and yet I have never been there myself.

My Visa was finally approved thanks to some hassling on Bryce's part, and so I'm getting ready to go in just over 1 week! Right now I'm working a lot to make up some missed shifts while I'm gone, which I suppose is a good thing because it makes the time go by faster.

coincidence?

2006-04-25T16:52:00.000-04:00

Sometimes I start to think too much about things like fate, luck, and coincidence. Eventually the topics get me really confused and I end up ignoring my inner monologue in order to stay somewhat sane. For example: after work last week, I walked from the hospital to Union Station where I was catching a train home to Mississauga. Instead of walking straight down Yonge St as I normally would, I decided on a whim to walk across King and down Bay. Half way down King St I looked up and saw a friend of mine (Haran and Bryce, you would appreciate this - it was Dan), so I stopped to chat with him for a few minutes before continuing on my way. It's just interesting to think about the possibility that there may be many people I know right within the same vicinity as myself at any given time, and it's just chance or fate or something that I choose a certain path and happen to run into them. If I had continued down Yonge St, would I have run into someone else I know? Is another friend of mine 5 minutes ahead of me down Bay? Who knows?

On a totally different note, I would like to comment on the fun I had on Saturday night for the housewarming/St Patty's Day party Heather and I had. Thanks so much to everyone who came out - I hope you had a good time and were able to meet many new people. I'd like to try to have another gathering sometime during the summer so that more of you can attend. And hey, maybe Heather's friend will bring that dip that kept Paul from leaving for a whole 15 minutes. :)

spring has sprung

2006-04-11T18:11:00.000-04:00

No news yet in regards to my Australian Visa application, but I am now $200 poorer and have been exposed to even more radiation than necessary. Can't win.

My parents are having the wood floors in the house re-finished, and I think I may be high on the sealing / polishing fumes. At least it's a nice day and we are able to open up all the windows and enjoy the nice weather.

In wedding news, I have just ordered my flowers (oooh, ahhh), and as per my wedding planner Paul, there will be a floating element involved in the centre pieces (Rich - now is the time to laugh some more :) )

Home again

2006-03-26T13:43:00.000-05:00

It seems that the only time I'm able to post anything on the blog is when I'm at home in Mississauga. I don't have a computer in my apartment, I can't go onto sites like these at work for certain professional reasons (aka: looks bad if my manager walks by and I'm posting when I should be doing something like taking care of my patient), and when I go to a local internet cafe I'm usually trying to plan a wedding.

Right now I seem to be working a lot and as a result am persistently exhausted - for some reason I'm only sleeping 3-5 hours after night shifts, and that lack of sleep carries over to my days off. I'm getting to like work more and more, but I'm still very unsure about a lot of things and continue to pester the other staff with questions. In the next few weeks I'll be going through another set of training so that I'll be able to take care of post-op patients that come straight from the OR after having open heart surgery. Right now I'm taking care of people who have been in the ICU for a few days or longer, and they don't necessarily have the same sort of acuity as the post-op patients. More learning and brain space to take up!!!

In other news, I'm still doing a lot of work with the wedding planning. I'm home today to print up the invitations for the overseas family and friends who will need to make travel plans. I also booked a trip to Australia at the end of May for a few weeks where we'll be able to celebrate the engagement with Bryce's family/friends, since many of them won't be able to get out to Canada in August. I'm really excited to be travelling again, as I wasn't expecting to be going anywhere for at least a year - this is awesome! The unfortunate part is that I am already going through Visa problems with the Aussie government - it seems the non-existant health problems I had before going down under back in 2004 will never be forgotten. I've sent in my 3rd application and have to wait a few weeks to see if I need another medical exam - just to visit the country for 2 WEEKS. It's so frustrating!

a short (but good!) visit

2006-02-11T13:56:00.000-05:00

For those of you who know (and those who don't), Bryce came for a visit during the last 2 weeks of January. After not seeing each other for over 5 months, it was really nice to be able to spend a lot of time together again and meet up with family and friends here in Toronto. Here is a photo of Bryce and my sister when we took her out for lunch in Guelph:

After giving Bryce a very quick tour of the city of Guelph and the University, Bryce and I continued onwards to Windsor where we were able to spend time with Haran and Dave (Haran has a photo, I do not). We then stayed with Shelley, a friend of our's from camp. Here is a shot of us with her daughters:

Despite a severe lack of snow for January, Bryce was able to experience some cold when we went to the ice sculpture exhibit at the Toronto city hall. Here we are sitting at an ice table:

And here we are again with Caroline and GianCarlo in front of (what looks like) an octopus. It was all melting, as temperatures had been up to 10 degrees that day.

My, how things have changed...

2006-01-13T20:51:00.000-05:00

Kathryn, aged 2-3:

And now, at age 21:

Happy Birthday Keeeeeeeetryn! (well, as of Jan 11th)

together again

2006-01-05T17:45:00.000-05:00

Here we are - Andrea, me, Mel and Caroline - at the 4th annual Firthingham Christmas dinner! It was great to have Andrea back from Edmonton for the holidays, as I haven't seen her since her wedding in Oct '04. There was great food, good movies, and a lot of laughter!

Here are Meleeeeessa and Andrea relaxing before dinner:

And here is a random shot of my mom and sister at a restaurant we went to the other night. It was yummy. They're probably going to kill me for posting the photo, but I don't care. Mwa ha ha ha...

happy new year!

2006-01-05T17:05:00.000-05:00

Christmas at home was great - I started off the day (at 12:01am) by talking with Bryce and his family on the phone - I certainly do miss them and wish that Australia were a lot closer (and flights a lot cheaper) so that I could visit more often. I think it was 25 degrees for them. Kathryn and I also continued with our tradition of watching 'A Christmas Carol' with Alastair Sims really late at night - it was fun! The 25th was spent the same as always - presents, a huge breakfast, snacking all day on junk food, and then a big Christmas dinner. It was nice to be home.

I spent 4 days working prior to New Year's, and then spent my first New Year's eve working as well. It was an interesting experience. There were only 6 patients in the ICU, and that meant only 8 staff were around. Without it being officially organized, we had a great potluck of food (and I therefore spent half of my time with my patient and the other half at the food counter), and watched the countdown on a portable tv we have. It was kind of strange... I didn't really know any of the people I was working with, we were all preoccupied with doing other things, and when we did gather around the tv for the countdown, no one really said much - it was a silent celebration of sorts. Kind of funny, actually. We could see the fireworks from city hall through the window though!

When I left work in the morning it was even more surreal: I walked down Yonge St to Union Station, and realized I was the ONLY person on the road! The same road which has the biggest celebratory parties after winning the olympics in hockey & the world series in baseball (at least in my lifetime) was completely deserted! A car would pass every few minutes, but I was all alone most of the time. When I arrived at Union, there were small groups of hungover and tired teens, and me. No rush hour commuters, no one dressed up in work clothes. Very strange.

And so the new year has started off with a bang - I'm working on my own now, and still learning huge amounts of information each day. I'm a little more comfortable with things at work, and I'm slowly getting to know more of the staff in my unit - there are over 100 of us on the payroll, so it'll take a while to get to know everyone. I'm also getting ready to move by packing everything but clothes - I have a lot of shit. So the next few weeks will be busy ones, but they'll fly by quickly and then Bryce will be here for a few weeks! YAY!!!!!!!!! :)

survival

2005-12-21T22:13:00.000-05:00

I think I've survived my first few shifts in the ICU, but I'll have a better idea as to my capabilities on Friday when I work on my own for the first time. I'm not sure how I feel about the whole situation, actually. On one hand I'm not as nervous as I expected because most of the staff are happy to help - but then there are the moments when I feel totally overwhelmed and clueless and those seem to be the moments when the ICU team (doctors, nurse practitioner, nutritionist, pharmacist, etc) comes around and starts asking questions... oh dear.

I've also dealt with the transition back to night shifts fairly well - just like being on Australia time again! And the best part is that when I'm going home on the train in the morning, it's light outside! Not that my eyes are open... (I can't wait until Jan 15th).

'tis the season

2005-12-12T20:01:00.000-05:00

I know I've been really slow in posting some pics - since there hasn't been much happening in my life other than classes these past few months, I feel that my photo-journalling (?) is a little inadequate at the moment. I'll try to make up for that in the coming months.

This is a shot of Mel and Caroline at a sushi restaurant we went to - my first raw fish sushi experience, and it even included the conveyer belt! I'm sure there's a more culinary-friendly term for that...

A few weeks ago my mom and I went to see the Hart House Singers perform at... Hart House. My friend Andrea is in the choir (which is the only reason I knew about it) and I was really impressed with the quality of music chosen and the actual performance. If I can find the time, I'll consider joining the choir myself in Jan.

This past Saturday was spent at Andrea (same one as in the choir) and her husband Chris' condo for a Christmas movie night. The food was good, conversation great, and I think we were all pleasantly surprised with the theatre we rented out to watch the movies in - check out the seating arrangements!

finito

2005-12-09T09:00:00.000-05:00

School's out - I feel half excited and half stressed out for what is to come. Tuesday I had a stressful shift because the nurse I was working with was questioning everything I did. I know it was meant in a nice way in order to get me thinking about all of my actions, but it was still hard for me to handle. I learn a lot every single shift I have there, but I think that one day was overload for me.

After our last shift, all of the students in my group and one of my clinical instructors went out for some drinks and food - a good way to wind down and let the stress attempt to leave. As we sat there, I started thinking about all of the things I would be able to do since finishing the course: I can now spend time with friends and family, I can send off Christmas cards and shop for gifts, I can re-organize my room and try to get rid of a lot of stuff that won't fit into my apartment in Jan, and I can sit at home on my butt and watch all the tv and movies I want!!!!!

I start work on Monday, but at least my days off will be free for me to do things. I have 2 days of orientation, 4 days of buddy shifts with another nurse, and then I'm on my own - It's a scary thought! I know I'm never completely on my own because there are nurses everywhere who are willing to help, but the entire situation seems very overwhelming. They say it takes about 6 months to one year to start to feel comfortable with things. :( Oh well, I'll get through it. I'll be asking a lot of questions and probably annoy a lot of people, but I'll get through it.

On another note - the other day when I was driving home from work along Mississauga Rd, I saw these dark figures on the street. As I got closer it turned out to be 2 horses pulling this giant wagon. My first reaction was: why don't they have any reflectors or lights on? They're going to be hit! Then the second, and more interesting, question popped into mind: Where the heck did they come from? Is there a secret farm in southern Mississauga that I don't know about? Just when you think you've seen almost everything.

countdown

2005-12-03T17:25:00.000-05:00

what a ride it's been! Granted, I know it hasn't been all that long in the grand scheme of things, especially compared to many other friends who are doing much longer graduate work, but this has been one intense and extremely steep learning curve. Only 3 more days of clinical and then I'm done the course!

I spent the morning going through and getting rid of junk that has piled up in my room over the years, and then I visited some family friends and showed off my Aussie photos. I was a little sad to be looking at them, because I'd love to be back there for a visit right now - but my life is here at the moment and so I try my best to keep the amazing memories happy ones so that I don't get too unhappy.

Rumour also has it that Bryce's mom and sister might be visiting this coming summer, which will be awesome!

Here's to 3 days and counting...

Step 1

2005-11-27T11:15:00.000-05:00

Essay completed.

Next step: study. And breathe.

(Happy birthday Paul!!! I think it's quite fitting that I spend your birthday studying, don't you? I have to keep up with the theme of the semester - I wouldn't want to shock anyone with a change of any kind.)

blah

2005-11-26T20:30:00.000-05:00

It's a Saturday night and while I should be out relaxing and enjoying life, I feel compelled to study. Granted, I haven't actually STARTED the studying part, but the intentions and the stress are with me. I had another panic attack yesterday as I realized the volume of information I'm supposed to know keeps growing, and yet I haven't been keeping up. I have my final written exam this Friday, and in that time I have to write an essay, go to clinical for 2 days, and learn everything. These panic attacks are becoming more frequent as the semester rolls by - Sunday nights are the worst because it usually means a new week at clinical and increased expectations of information regurgitation. Sleep is almost nonexistant regardless of whether I have to be at clinical, school, or home.

In other news: I bought a bed today that will be delivered to my apartment in January; I have gained a huge amount of respect for people who have to drive long distances to work every day in the snow - I was getting impatient during my short drive from the train station on Thursday; & it's too early for Christmas music 24-7. Granted, I do appreciate some Christmas music since I missed a lot of it last year, but not all the time.

C'est l'hiver

2005-11-17T16:46:00.000-05:00

It's winter and I like it! I was at the hospital for a few hours today, and when I left the building there was lovely blustery snow all about! ok, so maybe it's not that exciting, but I don't seem to mind the snow this time around since I missed it last year. And I guess this also means I'm a little insane.

Today was a really good learning day for me too - St Mike's has a patient simulator centre where different scenarios are programmed into a computerized dummy in order to teach all types of health care professionals how to deal with those types of situations. Nurses, doctors, physiotherapists, RT's (and maybe paramedics, although I'm not sure about that) use them, and it's a lot of fun once you get past the nervousness. The dummy has everything - pulses, various heart sound & rate options (you can program different murmurs, as well as the serious heart rhythms), breath sounds, and it can even be intubated (tube into lungs). We had a few cardiac arrest situations, some ventilator problems, and a head injury case. I would have loved to do that for a few more hours than we did!

Phase 2 is much more complex than phase 1, but in some ways it's good because it brings more pieces into the giant puzzle, which means I'm actually starting to understand a bit more. I'll also find out what my schedule is up until Jan 20th tomorrow, which means I can start planning things other than school!

2005-11-11T18:02:00.000-05:00

A photo for Remembrance Day:

Phase 2 begins

2005-11-11T17:44:00.000-05:00

Since my last post, I finished the 4th week of clinical and officially passed 'Phase 1' of the course, meaning I am now qualified to work in a step-down unit (which is half way between an ICU and a regular floor). That was a good feeling, I must say!

Last weekend I was able to spend some time with several friends whom I haven't seen in a while - which was nice! I also met up with my friend Heather and we found an apartment in Toronto! We saw the ad in the paper, looked at the apartment the next day, and took it on the spot! It's right at Yonge & Eglinton (Yonge & Eligible??), and perfect for me who commutes on the subway line and Heather who drives up to the 401 for work. We get to move in on Jan 15th, and I'm already getting excited about it. Now all I need is to win the lottery to furnish it...

This past week was spent back in the classroom, learning things like advanced hemodynamics, shock, acute renal failure, hemodialysis, cardiac surgery... fun fun fun! It is really interesting, actually, but it's just so much to take in during such a short period of time. Now I'm expected to know hundreds of pages worth of detailed info by Monday as I'll have to regurgitate it all to my instructors. But there's only 4 weeks left of the course, so I think I can tough it out for now.

exhaustifying

2005-10-28T08:50:00.000-04:00

I don't even think that's a word, but it's how I feel nonetheless.

I completed my 3rd week of clinical, with one more to go. Overall the experience has been really good, and I've noticed a lot of improvement within the last week as well - which is a good sign! There is still so much that I don't know, and I'm constantly having to review my anatomy and physiology in order to be able to explain the underlying causes and problems that my patients have, but it's good practice and good for the brain. I feel as though this course is like a giant medical trivia game - every day I go in and there's something new for me to learn and be able to explain/understand within a matter of hours.

My first week was spent in the cardiovascular ICU where I'll be working once I (hopefully!) finish the course. It was a little scary since it was my first few days in an ICU and a lot of the equipment was overwhelming (10 IV lines, ventilators, cardiac monitors, etc). The second week was spent in the Neuro Trauma ICU which was REALLY interesting since my hospital is one of only 2 hospitals in Toronto that accept traumas. This means that there were quite a few patients with really serious injuries - on one hand a great learning experience for me, and on the other hand really sad to realize that so many serious injuries do occur every single day. This past week I was in the medical-surgical ICU and again learned a lot. It's amazing how much my brain is absorbing despite being constantly tired physically and mentally - I'm like a human sponge! It also depends on the nurse I'm working with - some of them are really good at prompting me to use my brain and think about why certain things are happening / why certain meds are given, etc., and I really do appreciate it (especially because it prepares me for when my instructors come along and quiz me for about 1 hour each day in regards to every single detail!).

I took the 'day off' yesterday to bum around home and do nothing, and when I woke up this morning I realized that I still have to write up an entire self-evaluation, an essay, and review (yet again) all of my patho in the next few days. That's NOT a nice feeling. But clinical will be over on Tuesday, I have a medication and ECG interpretation exam next Friday, and then it will be back to the classwork the following week for the beginning of 'Phase 2' of the course.

So here's to random days off and hoping that my brain doesn't become too saturated in the next few weeks!

Clinical

2005-10-14T12:37:00.000-04:00

This past week was full of new learning and new experiences for me as I spent 2 days in the ICU. The first day was really a time to become accustomed to all of the new equipment and basic skills that we have to know, and I worked with a great nurse that day. I figured out how to sort through 10+ IV lines, learned more about ventilators, new suctioning equipment (post SARS), and the most thorough assessment techniques I've ever used. I obviously won't go into more detail because no one really wants to know what goes on in ICU's, so I'll spare you of the info.

By the end of the first day I was completely exhausted and just wanted to sleep - which I did.

My second day was a little better in terms of my ability to do certain skills, but it wasn't a great day for my patient, who had become very unstable overnight. In that aspect ICU nursing is really interesting, because it really keeps you thinking the entire shift and using problem solving skills that you never even considered before. I think the hardest part for me will be dealing with the family members, but that's also something I'll be learning as I go.

Both days I was up at 5am and at work before the sun rose, and home after the sun had set. At least there are huge windows at each bedside so I'm not totally cut off from the outside world. This coming week I'll be giving medications, which means I have to know everything about them - so here's to more studying!

Freedom!

2005-10-07T17:38:00.000-04:00

Sort of. The exam went well today, so I have a few days off until I start the gruelling process of clinical placement. I'm happy for the moment though, and that's all that counts right now!