Fat Grl Slim

I got tagged!!!!

2008-07-21T14:17:00.006-06:00

Alright, I'm ridiculously excited about this and I don't even know why! But thanks to the ever wonderful and eloquent Minx, I now get to spend some quality time procrastinating whilst answering some of life's more important questions. Thanks Minx for saving me from chapter 2 of my thesis!

5 things found in your bag:

1) Sephora lip gloss in Sugar Coat.

2) Tiger Balm. Can't live without that stuff! Cures nausea, headaches, sore muscles and insect bites. I use it when the children are driving me crazy at work.

3) My planner and heaps of stickies.

4) Orbit Sangria gum because they were out of mint mojito!

5) Glasses case and cleaner because I'm always forgetting to wear my contacts!

5favorite things in your room (bedroom)

1) My really big 22" monitor.

2) Two framed pictures of Georgia O'Keefe taken by her sometimes lover Alfred Stieglitz. Beautiful stuff.

3) My ultra comfy bed.

4) My boyfriend. How cheesy can you get? I know -- but I've never had one before and I'm sort of liking it.

5) The print of these gorgeous poppies painted by HBB's mum. Gorgeous! Dramatic and beautiful. Especially with the funky colored walls in my bedroom.

5 things I have always wanted to do

1) Have tea in the Sahara (thank you Paul Bowles...)

2) Finish my dang masters!

3) Sleep in one of those huts in the Maldives that are out over the ocean.

4) Get published (sorry Minx - I knicked this from you.) I'm all about getting published. I want to write cheezy romance novels. Don't ask.

5) Get on the scale and not think "Wow I need to lose a few pounds!".

5 things I am currently into:

1) Reading blogs, way too many blogs.

2) Adobe anything and my Wacom Bamboo graphics tablet (that I don't even know how to fully operate yet!)

3) Designing websites (ultrageek admission!)

4) My swamp cooler -- it's hot peeps, what can I say!

5) Being a better teacher. I'm tired of the American public hating on teachers -- I want to show them they are wrong about teachers and public schools. We work hard and we do make change!

5 People I want to tag:

1) Comrade GoGo

2) DoriAnn

3) Julie

4) Fat Bridesmaid

5) Shannon

In other completely weight related news, I dragged my behind to the gym yesterday and had a good 60 minute workout. 36 minutes of cardio and lower body strength training. Wow. Can you say sore? Dang! But man do I feel sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo much better today!!!! I'm not driving to the gym today since HBB and I took the dog for a walk this morning but I am planning on doing an upper body workout.

Also, I was OP! Yeah me! Sigh. Sometimes it just takes seeing 'that' number on the scale to kick yer behind into gear. Does everyone have a 'that' number or is it just me?

OK, back to home reno projects and the thesis!

FGS

Like Time Through an Hourglass...

2008-07-21T08:13:00.003-06:00

Okay, didn't I just post yesterday? Apparently not! Clearly, I'm too busy with the thesis, house painting and hiding my head in shame to post. Let's just say things are not good on the front lines and I am making the choice to spend the gas money and go back to the gym. I can't handle not having the gym in my life. Neither can my belly! So It's back I go today with a goal of going 5 days and working out for 45 minutes to 1.5 hours. Sigh. My good intentions never made it out the door to take the dog for a walk and it is now time for drastic measures.

Of course, I don't think my dog likes this revised plan, but she will just have to cope!

And now we return to radio silence as we continue to work on our thesis...and attempt to stop referring to ourselves in the the third person....stop it! Now! We don't like it.........

FGS!

I need a little INSPIRATION!!!!

2008-07-09T09:05:00.003-06:00

PHENOMENAL WOMAN
by Maya Angelou

Pretty women wonder where my secret lies
I'm not cute or built to suit a model's fashion size
But when I start to tell them
They think I'm telling lies.
I say
It's in the reach of my arms
The span of my hips
The stride of my steps
The curl of my lips.
I'm a woman
Phenomenally
Phenomenal woman
That's me.

So I put this poem up which I'm sure everyone has read a million times as a little inspirational reminder to myself that I am great.

I'm still not feeling it though.

I'm like a little ventriloquist puppet these days -- I can say the right words but I don't really believe them. Nor do I always do what I know I'm supposed to do. It is Slackerville for me these days.

Sigh -- whoever said "the road to hell is paved with good intentions" certainly knew what they were talking about! It is so easy to plan and plot when it comes to weight loss. Heck, I have the most detailed journal of what I should be doing at the gym today. The other part of it is the hard work and commitment, neither of which I seem to have in spades these days.

I was reading a post the other day (think it was one of the fab girls on the WW boards!) where she was talking about the ebb and flow of weight loss. I'm so with her on this one! I go through periods where I can lose and work out everyday for months at a time -- and then I seem to hit a wall (like, um, NOW) and can't be arsed to do a thing. I'm maintaining, but can't seem to push myself to do more. And then (and I can already feel this coming) I get sick of doing nothing or my body is just ready for more and I'm back at it again, full on the way I like it. But in these down swings I feel SO USELESS! And, to top it all off, I feel heavier and larger than I was when I started all of this 30 some odd pounds ago! What's up with that?

And the funny thing is I know if I just dragged my butt back to the gym or got out of bed earlier to work out, I'd feel better. But I don't do it. I know how to fix my little broken bits right now, but can't be bothered to do it!

Can you say RUT? Rut rut ruttedy rut!

I've been here before, and I know I will get out of it. But really can someone PLEASE kick me in the ass and make me stop whining about it??? I mean really!

In other news, I have to take a moment to count my blessings. First off HBB. He's in the kitchen right now making me another pot of coffee. I lurve him! And he's perfectly happy eating WW cuisine. Sigh, does it get any better? And I think he thinks I'm a Phenomenal woman so that is a step in the right direction...So that is my happy thought for the day.

Okay, enough with the self flagellation! This too shall pass..............

Lots of love and chocolate covered kisses,

FGS

Things I never want to know the point value of....

2008-07-06T10:15:00.003-06:00

And why do I always end my titles in ellipses?

So I NEVER, EVER want to know how many points are in a Strawberry Cheesecake Spoonbender at Good Times. NEVER. EVER.

The 4th of July turned out to be pretty good. We went to a Colorado Rapids game to have some beers, watch a game and then partake in the obligatory fireworks display. The Rapids won (4-0) which made for a very exciting game. I stuck to my 3 beer limit over the course of the evening and even switched to water (which I very thoughtfully remembered to pack!). Additionally, there was no late night after drinking binge-fest because people were a bit too loaded to bring into a restaurant. Not mentioning names though!

Earlier in the day, I wasn't so well behaved. Something about deviled eggs that drives me over the edge every time! But, I have no regrets. Except for maybe that Spoonbender I had last night! It sounded soooooooooooooooooooooooooo good and I'll freely admit tasted good too. But dang, when your tummy isn't used to having that much dairy, things get a bit dicey after consuming that much frozen custard!

In yet another moment of brilliance, I decided to make cold, point friendly salads to have in the fridge. OMG! I'm loving it! Last night for dinner we had cold everything! Perfect in the 90 degree heat and point-friendly to boot! So I'm looking for some more point friendly salads. I'm thinking lentils this time around. Not that I don't love me some pasta salad... Any ideas, oh faithful readers?

Ok, back to the thesis! I cannot wait to get this sucker finished!!!!!

FGS

Why do I have Lionel Richie songs running through my head???

2008-07-04T08:15:00.004-06:00

Not only is it the 4th of July, but it is also my 100th post!!!!!!!!!!!!! So I guess I can't help but want to celebrate!

As we enter the day's minefield of food and beer and things you just shouldn't eat on a regular basis, I feel ready and well prepared! I've even already signed up to be the designated driver this evening! Yes, even this Fat Grl is capable of occasional moments of brilliance! No beer = less out of control points day! Although I can't guarantee that I'm going to turn down a hot dog today, because, after all, it is Independence Day and it would just be un-American of me, I know I'll be watching my portion sizes. And maybe, just maybe if I'm really good I can get HBB to eat a hot dog and I can just steal a bite. Again, moments of brilliance!

So to all of my domestic readers -- have a wonderful 4th of July filled with moments of brilliance, calorie free homemade ice cream and excessive amounts of safety! And all of you foreign readers, hope you had a good day at work!

FGS

Ahhh it's the little things...

2008-07-03T15:37:00.003-06:00

So I managed to keep track of points today! Yeah me! I'll be back in the game in no time! HBB and I took a shopping trip (as promised yesterday) to buy him some geeky things and me some more nutritional yeast and food from Walmart.

Okay, I've just admitted that I shop at Walmart. It's a love hate relationship though. Today I actually called their customer service line asking why it was the retail giant is not stepping up to the line and giving it's shoppers discounts for using reusable shopping bags. I mean, if you are going to go through hell to get that extra big box of microwave popcorn and that tub of Jif, you can at least be environmentally friendly, right? I spoke to a very pleasant gentleman who listened as I told him how wonderful King Soopers and Whole Paycheck were for giving me a little reward for protecting the environment. I think he thought I was nuts. But, he passed along the information to the management. Or so he said. I just can't seem to stop myself from shopping there! Believe me, I tried to break up with Walmart last week. But there I was again today, googly eyed over the gallon jug of white vinegar I bought that cost me under $2. What's a girl to do? Walmart is like that badass biker boy you know you shouldn't date because it's only going to lead to trouble - without the black leather or cool factor though. And honestly, I'm so broke I don't know if I can afford my values right now! Don't get me wrong -- I love me some Ezekiel bread and those $5 mangoes at Whole Paycheck make me drool. But I'm a single working girl with a mortgage and debt and a gas tank to fill. So forgive me out there.......some day I will break up with Walmart, just not today.

Sigh. I feel dirty now. I think I might have to take a shower. Stupid Walmart.

FGS

Summertime............

2008-07-02T11:01:00.002-06:00

and the living is filled with watermelon, burgers and beer. Oh, and s'mores. Can't forget the s'mores!

Yes, this fat grl has been on a serious hiatus, again. Not intentional, I just got a wee bit distracted. And believe me when I say I am all about focus now! I am actually afraid to get near the scale at the moment. Very afraid. But I'm going to do it! Monday, right after this weekend of debauchery. Ok, at the moment we are broke and have nothing major planned, but I know my friends and know that something will happen last minute.

On another note, I have somewhat given up on the gym for the summer. Why am I giving up on the gym for the summer you ask? Well, when I am at work, the gym is incredibly convenient -- just up the street from my school. But, now that it's summer it becomes a 14mile round trip drive. And let's face it, gas ain't cheap!

Now before you all yell at me for giving up (which I am not!!!), let me tell you that between my Yoga Booty Ballet, The Firm and Power 90 dvds (yeah, let's just not go there, ok?), I think I will be ok. And, the dog will be in heaven because I'm going to take her for more walks......

So, I'm back with a game plan.........no more loooooooooooooooooooooong disappearances!

FGS

Lean Times.......

2008-06-17T07:55:00.002-06:00

In posts, in money, in just about everything - except my ass. Somehow it missed the memo that things were tight. Of course, I could help things along by actually going to the gym. Novel concept, I know! But, hey, real life doesn't always allow for the gym 7 days a week. Reality check!

Sigh. I can't even seem to complete a blog!

This summer has certainly thrown me for a loop routine-wise!

Since I'm supposed to be cleaning my house (because something tells me HBB won't be impressed with a massive pile of dishes in the sink when he arrives in, oh 5 hours!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!), I'm going to keep this one short.

Wish me luck on the cleaning front.........

Hasta la proxima,
FGS

And she's back...really!

2008-06-09T14:28:00.003-06:00

I did it! I went to the gym!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Amazing, I know. I also got myself back on the scale to have a little accountability check. Surprisingly, on the scale front, things weren't so bad! Only up 4 pounds from back March. Not too bad considering the amount of stress and lack of exercise I've had for the last month of my life. Hmmm, maybe I am developing decent coping skills after all.

On the cardio front, it's a different story! I did 30 minutes on the elliptical and saw my heart rate go where it goes after I've run two miles. Ugh. Talk about depressing. I haven't had a 30 minute workout that got me 6 activity points in a coons age! So I can see that the major focus in my life right now is going to be getting my cardio strength back. So it's back to the gym. I think, and I'm being honest here, it's only really feasible to do over the summer 3 or 4 days a week. With gas prices and other stuff going on (read that as HBB moving in for the summer!), I don't want to make the gym my only priority. Besides, at the end of the day, who goes to the gym 6 days a week? Is it realistic? Not so much. I need to be realistic. 5 days a week during the school year with the occasional extra day thrown in and 4 days during the summer with an occasional day thrown in. Seems pretty realistic to me!

And when did I get all practical and shiz?

Well I can tell you one thing, I seriously feel like I'm in hunker down mode! Sometimes, I feel like preparing for nuclear winter. I'm stockpiling cheap food (beans and rice and other canned staples) and not driving as many places. I just wish Denver had better public transportation! I'd be all over it. I'm also considering getting myself a bike. Any little bit will help. And just imagine the benefits to my butt and legs if I biked to work every day!

Ok, the garden calls!

Hasta la proxima,
FGS

Insert HUGE sigh of relief here.........

2008-06-03T08:42:00.002-06:00

Yeah!!!!!!!!!! I survived the school year! Let me tell you kids, switching from high school to elementary is a bit daunting. I don't want to do that again! I might as well have taken a job in bloody real estate for all I knew about working with elementary students! But, the year is over and next year is going to be much, much easier. Funny how we teachers think of years as a unit of time measuring from August to June. We are silly like that.

Anyhow, I kept my goal of maintaining. I'm at exactly the same weight I was when HBB left. Hey, it was all I could handle with the stress of work and everything else going on. Chaos, let me tell you. But, tomorrow is another day, right?

As for dragging my behind to the gym, well, that hasn't exactly started happening yet. I think this week I'll concentrate on food and maybe take the dog for few walks here and there and next week,I'll really get at it. Ease back into it....... Besides, I have plenty of things to do around my house that might count as activity points!

So that's what's new in FGS land. Not a whole lot! Very dull in fact. But I promise, back to thrice weekly posts ASAP. In fact I'll kick that goal off now. Time to kick this blog up a notch!

Hasta la proxima......
FGS

Rainbow Sparkles and other Supernovas

2008-05-27T06:47:00.003-06:00

So, I feel like I'm about to get a big old scolding for disappearing off the face of the blog universe. Don't fret though, I brought my towel!

It is the end of the school year and life is chaos. Not to mention having to go to a training for 4 days. Chaos. I've also been crazy busy trying to find a summer job. I have applied everywhere. And no luck. Sigh. It's tough times right now peeps, tough times. It actually scares me a bit. Glad I'm happy being a homebody! And glad I have lots to keep me busy here at home this summer.

So FGS readers, I ask you, what are you doing to hunker down and ride out this economic storm?

On the weight front, I've kept my promise to myself to maintain, despite constantly sabotaging myself with Chipotle (not actually my choice -- and it didn't even taste good! How's that for progress?) And after this week, I'm planning on getting back on the wagon. Big time. After this training I went to I got it in my head that I wanted to try out what I learned so I think I'll tutor four days a week (who says teachers don't give their time for free!) and coordinate my tutoring with gym time. And maybe, fingers crossed, I can coordinate all of it with a second job!

In other news, look for some changes on FGS! I have a host and some exciting changes in the works. I'm also going to be starting a blog about frugality and saving money. Changes changes changes -- for the girl who loves change!

Okay, it's time for work. Booooooooooooooooooooooo! I'm just happy there are only 3, yes THREE, more days left. Wahooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Keep it realz,
FGS

Why I do my job.......

2008-05-15T05:46:00.004-06:00

In search of my whys, I thought I would add why I do my job. As I have mentioned before, I'm a teacher. I work in a small, low performing, low socioeconomic, mostly non-English speaking district in a large urban area. To say that my job is challenging is describing a good day. To say that I sometimes feel helpless to make change happen is an understatement. I don't think I've ever felt so loved and so hated all at the same time then when I started my career as a teacher. But this really isn't about me today, because I could go on forever!

This time of the year as a teacher always becomes chaotic. It's inevitable. Nice weather, graduating seniors, kids gone wild. Yesterday, however, was a day worth noting. It was my answer to why I teach. Hell, I'm even tearing up thinking about it now. Yesterday our seniors had to present their graduation projects. Listening to these kids, our future, talk about their dreams and hopes and plans always gives a teacher hope. But our kids take it a step further. Our kids are immigrants, often illegal. They come from families who have very little but the wish for a better life for their kids. And they come from families who don't want them to go to college. They come from families who love them immensely. And they come from families who don't or can't show up to their presentations, their graduation or scholarship award ceremonies. They come from families who don't care if they make it, who don't value their safety or health. And they come from families who are with them every step of the way. It is such a dichotomy. To see these kids make it, despite everything they are up against always makes my year.

Of course, writing this I have a student in mind. Our valedictorian. I doubt that she has a 4.0 for all her years of studying, especially with her rebellious freshman and sophomore years as big failures on the books. But this kid is our valedictorian -- and rightly so. This kid came to the US as young kid, mastered English, took charge of her life and made a difference in her school. Her parents told her that they didn't want her to go to college but she went out and got full ride scholarships to some schools and applied for every scholarship she could to fulfill her goal of becoming a doctor in the Latino community. But, she's illegal. So she had to turn down her acceptance to her dream school because she can't get loans to cover the difference. But has she given up? No. She'll get there because this kid doesn't give up -- despite horrible things that have happened to her in her life, a family who doesn't care if she makes it, and a system that is working against her. This kid will make it because she has her why. And she won't take no for an answer.

So I don't want this to be a political blog. But... I can't seem to help it today, especially after watching students who stood up in all their illegal glory, with college acceptances in hand, scholarships received, and outlined their plans to become a doctor, an architect, a teacher and a Peace Corps volunteer. And all I could think was: wow! These kids are going to make a difference in the world. And we are damn lucky to have them here, in our country, with their energy and drive and desire to make change. All people seem to see from our border dilemma is unwanted baggage. We get so much more than that. We, the United States, get their children, their future. Now let's help them attain their dreams of getting to college so that we have one more Latino doctor and another bilingual teacher working in our communities to make change.

FGS

What's your WHY?

2008-05-07T06:47:00.003-06:00

Only 17 more days of work! If you haven't guessed, I'm a teacher and work is almost over for the summer. For those of you nay-sayers out there who think teachers don't need a summer break, well don't get me started! I for one know that if I didn't have a summer break, I'd go insane. You try being in a room with 30 mouthy, needy children for 182 days......

But I digress.

Yesterday was run a mile day. I didn't get to run because a)I'm having a hard enough time managing work commitments and actually getting sleep and b)I'm just super tired. Excuses, excuses. I should have been running 20 miles after eating that Pastel de Tres Leches one of my students brought on Monday! She decided we needed to have a Cinco de Mayo party in my classroom and so told her sister that she needed to bring a cake. Crazy kiddo! It was a fun and impromptu party and if you've never had a Tres leches cake, I strongly advise you NEVER NEVER NEVER to do so. It is quite possibly the most amazing cake I've ever had -- and I'm generally a chocolate fan so that is saying a lot!

And the tangent queen strikes again........

Back to the whole point of this blog! What's your WHY? Weird title. Yesterday during the run a mile day coverage on my local news network, this professional runner/trainer guy was on talking about exercise and getting healthy and losing weight. And he said something very subtly profound. He said something to this extent: we all have our who's, what's, when's and how's of our exercise and weight loss plans but often times we end up with really shaky WHY's. And at the end of the day, if you don't have a really good WHY (like one Fat Grl I know right now!), it gets hard to stick with the plan. How true are those words? I think we often underestimate the power of why we do things. I realize that that's one of the main reasons I've been treading water -- I've forgotten my why.

Thank you all for your kind words and support these last few weeks of me floundering. I can't tell you how wonderful it is to get a random email in my inbox with kind words of support or kicks in the arse. Thank you, thank you, thank you!

Humbly yours,
FGS

Treading Water

2008-05-03T08:45:00.002-06:00

I am treading water.

Yup. Stuck in limbo land -- not gaining, not losing, not moving forward, not totally standing still. Just living in limbo. I am somewhat okay with that. This time of the year is generally abysmal and horribly stressful. It's the nature of my job and I do my best to cope. I am sticking to my goal to maintain though. And most importantly, I'm not, NOT giving up.

I've also decided to start another blog to be more accountable about my finances. Something about blogging everything makes me stick to my plans and goals. I don't want to be in debt for the rest of my life, just like I don't want to be fat for the rest of my life. So, a new blog is born -- made by the financially clueless, for the financially clueless. I'll post details when it is up and running!

As for the other thing, those lingering pounds, well June 1st I'm coming for you......................

FGS

Sunday, SUNDAY, Sunday!!!!!!!

2008-04-27T13:53:00.004-06:00

"Your life is an occasion, rise to it. "

I love it. And I'm rising! Just like the yummy hunk of pizza dough in my kitchen... I'm rising because this is my one shot -- to change, to grow, to learn, to be great, to make mistakes, to everything.

You have to love Sunday's. I certainly do. They usually mean a serious spinning class followed by a leisurely breakfast and heaps of coffee. Today it has been another sunny and glorious day and I've just finished my last cup of coffee (yeah, I might be up all night.....). I had all these great plans to mow and dig and water. Yeah, not so much. But I have done all the dishes and my laundry so I count myself ahead, for now at least. I suppose I should get out there and drag the hose out. Especially since it is supposed to be HOT tomorrow. Yeah like 76 degrees. So that's not really hot but I'm sure my garden would appreciate a little TLC.

I had forgotten what a pain it is to haul out the hoses for the front garden. Sigh. Someday, I'll win the lottery and will be able to afford a proper irrigation system. Someday. Of course, this summer, life is looking a bit bleak when it comes to money and home improvements. But, I'll make it through. I always do. And somehow, I'll figure out a way to sort it all out!!!

******************

Speaking of change and total randomness, Jenna over at Eat, Live, Run posted a pic of vegan nachos with this amazing looking queso sauce (this is the link to the recipe)made with nutritional yeast. Yeah, weird! But her yummy looking sauce and accompanying link inspired me to be brave and channel my inner veg. Alright, so I barely have an inner veg but in a commitment to eating healthier, I hauled myself to Vitamin Cottage in search of nutritional yeast. Turns out nutritional yeast is pretty darn amazing. A whopping 8g of protein per serving and heaps of B vitamins in the form of potassium. Now, I grew up in Vermont which is pretty much a dairy state and I love me some cheese (including the kind that comes in a can) so to say I was a little skeptical about this cheese sauce was an understatement. Boy was I impressed!!! I made the best nachos ever!!! I omitted the butter from this recipe with no problem. When cooked, it has the consistency of Velveeta and Rotel and tastes pretty similar to it. So if you are feeling a little adventurous, try it!!!

I also bought some spouted grain English muffins which are amazing, some almond butter and some muesli. Despite my general belief that the health food store costs more, I felt that Vitamin Cottage was quite reasonable and think I'll head there next time I need to stock up on random things the normal grocery doesn't carry.

And I was a good girl and brought my shopping bags with me!!!

Sigh, maybe there is hope for me after all........I still have a long way to rise!

Love yaz,
FGS

Friday thoughts....

2008-04-25T07:13:00.002-06:00

Well the weekend is almost here! Thank goodness. What a week! But hey, I'm still standing!

I wanted to start the weekend with this thought:

Yes...I will try again tomorrow.

Have a good Friday my lovelies!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FGS

I AM the Biggest Loser!!!

2008-04-24T07:25:00.003-06:00

In sooooooooooooooooo many ways…

Right now, I am working on getting back to being the biggest loser when it comes to my weight. Managed to catch up to ye olde weight loss wagon, now I’m just figuring out the best way to haul my tuchus from the galloping horse I’m riding on over to said wagon. Not easy I tell you – especially since I think my horse is headed to Taco Bell……

Anyhooooo, life goes on. Tonight is my last session with PT. Sigh, another ending. But the perfect time to start a new beginning. Tomorrow morning before my crack of dawn workout, I’m going to measure myself again and track my progress aPT (after PT). I haven’t tracked my stats in forever. I’ve become a wee bit complacent and have been resting on my laurels and the fact that all my clothes fit. Good thing summer is almost here and I can go back to working out twice a day for a while to kick it into gear. 40lbs to go peeps, 40lbs to go! I always seem to hit this weight where I’m at and get stalled. I’ve been losing and gaining the same 5lbs for the last month. Good times I tell you, good times. Time to shake it up. Time to get back to those crazy morning swims and starting to take the dog for walks in the evening again. Time to remember what my goals are. Time to stop being so stuck in a rut….heck at this point, I feel like I am the rut. Rutty rut rut rutsky. So here I come, one Fat Grl, shaken not stirred…

In other interesting news, I’m a sushi addict. I’m just glad in my current financial state that I know how to roll my own. Raise your hand if you are sick of being broke!!!!!! But hey, as long as I have some sushi and enough coffee to keep me happily buzzed, this Fat Grl is a happy camper!

I'm glad it's almost Friday.....

FGS

Viva!!!

2008-04-20T07:25:00.005-06:00

Alright, it is Sunday and I'm a spinning slacker. Shhhhh. Again, not a peep. I've made a deal with myself that if I don't spin (which I've already bailed on) that this house needs to be spotless and the yard needs to be mowed.

But first, a minor diversion!!!

Anne-Marie over at This Mama Cooks! put out a call for healthy Mexican recipes. Of course, since once upon a time, I used to live in Mexico, I have to represent! Especially since the American version of most Mexican foods is horribly fatty and not at all what it is like in Mexico. So here is my recipe for Sopa de Tortilla (sometimes called Sopa Azteca).

Sopa de Tortilla is perhaps one of the simplest soups to make with the longest list of ingredients. It is yummy and surprisingly light and is a great way to use up leftover chicken. Though there are a multitude of ways to 'fatten' this soup up, the version below (minus the garnishes) is quite points friendly.

Fat Grl's Sopa de Tortilla
2 pasilla chilies
2 ancho chilies
(note: both pasilla and ancho chilies can be purchased dried and reconstituted. Check your local supermarket in the Mexican food aisle. They are usually in a bag. You could also substitute with chipotle chilies en adobo (in a can) but don't go overboard because they have a very strong flavor)
1 can of diced, no-salt added tomatoes
1 white onion, sliced
4 cloves of garlic, chopped coarsely
1 Tbsp olive or corn oil
2 sprigs of epazote (a Mexican herb which can be replaced with cilantro)
2+ quarts of chicken broth (I usually make my stock using bouillon so I don't always measure precisely -- my rule of thumb, if the stock taste too strong, dilute a bit)

Reconstitute the chilies in hot water. When they are soft, remove stems and seeds. In a blender or food processor, blend chilies, onion, garlic, tomatoes and some of the epazote or cilantro. Blend until smooth, adding water as needed. You can strain this mixture if you prefer, but I find it to be an unnecessary added step. Strain if you prefer a clear, chunk free broth.

In a large stock pot, heat 1 Tbsp of oil. Add the mixture of chilies and cook until it has thickened. Add the chicken stock and epazote. Simmer for 25 minutes or until hot. Remove epazote prior to serving.

But wait, this is Sopa de Tortilla! Where's the tortillas? Patience, young grasshopper!

No Sopa de Tortilla is complete without the accoutrements! Warning, this list may seem long, but it is dang easy to assemble...

As the broth is simmering away, gather up the following:
limes, lots of limes! Cut into wedges
diced or shredded chicken breast (or whatever you have leftover)
cooking spray
12 corn tortillas (the small ones)
2 avocados, diced
1 cup of cheese -- traditionally this soup is served with panela cheese, I like queso fresco. (Recently both of these have started showing up in my local supermarket. A mild feta or a 2% cheddar would work too.)
Crema mexicana or it's healthier cousin, low-fat sour cream

Turn your oven broiler on high. Slice the tortillas into approximately 1/4 inch strips. Cover a cookie sheet in tin foil (easy clean up). Spray foil with cooking spray. Lay a single layer of tortillas on the cookie sheet then spray again with cooking spray. Broil until crispy, turning halfway through.

To serve:
Add diced chicken to a soup bowl. Ladle hot soup over the top. Top with avocado, cheese, crema and tortillas. Give a generous squeeze of lime.

Approximate points value of the broth is 0.
Point value of the garnishes and chicken just depends on what you add. You can easily keep the value between 6-8pts for a generous serving. Keep in mind, the broth is extremely flavorful and you will not need a lot of garnish (cheese and cream).

Enjoy!

A note about Fat Grl's cooking: I am not, NOT, a perfectionist. I add a little more of this, a little less of that. This is the bones -- change it how you like!

And that is my healthy Mexican recipe!

Have a great sunshiney day!

FGS

Green is Such a Pretty Color

2008-04-19T13:57:00.005-06:00

So it's a gorgeous sunny day here in Denver. One that started off for me with eggs benedict at McCoy's (shh not a peep!) and a trip to the restaurant supply store. There was a major amount of drooling involved over the commercial ranges. My mission was to find a bread pan. Yeah because as you might have noticed, I'm becoming a cooking machine - or at least a hypothetical cooking machine. Today is my first foray into the world of French bread. And this weeks muffin du jour is whole wheat pumpkin cranberry walnut. Say that ten times fast! I'm also cooking a veggie lasagna and some kale and turkey sausage soup. No excuse to bail on good eating when it is all ready to go! And to touch on the green theme of this blog, while I'm not so sure that baking your own bread is cheaper in either energy use or ingredients, I think that knowing what goes into your food is also being green -- taking care of your body by not eating foods with crazy amounts of preservatives or salt or ingredients you can't pronounce is green to. At least in my book! And let's face it, homemade bread just plain old tastes better too!

This week has been much better than last in the old eating department. I kind of feel as if I'm going through another metamorphosis so to speak when it comes to my eating habits. There's eating your points any which way you choose, which I think was my modus operandi prior to now and then there's thoughtfully eating your points with food that is both good for you nutritious and points friendly. I'm slowly moving into this second phase. I bought flax today...and Fage Greek yogurt! I'm working on putting better quality food into me.

I finally seem to have gotten back on the wagon (couple of slips this week -- can you say SALT consumption!). This is my own journey though. And I no longer feel as if I need to lose all of the weight by tomorrow. This is a slow process -- who would have thought! And I'm okay with it being slow. Because I'm learning -- about me, about my body, about being healthy and having balance. I don't have to have anyone count out six tomatoes. I can eat what I want. It's my choice. I'm in control. And if I want that dang cake, I'm going to eat it. With ice cream. I'm the boss of me.

I'm just glad that these days the only sweet I usually crave is yummy dark chocolate in moderation....

So this girl, and her reusable shopping bags, are slowly going green. I'm buying in bulk, reducing my waste, eating healthier responsibly grown and produced foods, growing my own food and contemplating ways I can drive less. Next step -- recycling.

Off to soak up some of the lovely Denver sunshine!!! Got to love spring in the Rocky's! Almost 80 degrees and not a cloud in the sky...........

Keep it realz,
FGS

Impossible IS my favorite word, dammit!

2008-04-17T12:41:00.001-06:00

Yesterday I took an unscheduled trip to Subway to get a $5 footlong (turkey and veg only!!! So it was 11 points – but I stayed OP!) and there was this lady there whining about her diet. Okay, remember how I said whatever works for you? Well, I still honestly believe that. Yeah whatever works for you. She kept going on about how she'd started her diet (Fit for life, was what she said) 3 days ago and just how miserable she was. I just sat there contemplating which bread I was going to have with my turkey footlong veggie extravaganza. She ordered a salad. Nothing on it. And made the poor girl count out exactly six slices of tomato and six slices of cucumber for it. Bloody ridiculous! Is there something magical about the number 6? Some great power of weight loss that it possesses? Sigh – whatever works.

Coming back from my trip to Subway (big honking turkey sub in hand), I pulled into the parking lot and just sat there and watched some of the fourth grade students run out to the playground for recess. I got a wee bit nostalgic thinking about that feeling – you know, that free feeling, the one you got when you were a kid and finally allowed to play after sitting still for so long. That feeling of excitement – where you can barely feel your feet touching the ground you are running so fast. Then I tried to remember the last time I felt that way. And I couldn't remember. Maybe freedom feels differently when you are a grown up.

Sigh, being a grown up sucks and I admit it: I'm one frustrated girl at the moment and I don't always like being a grownup. Life has been a bit daunting lately. Money woes, faraway boyfriend woes, job woes. Woe is me… yeah I could believe that and sink into a pit of despair. And I admit that some days I want to just that. But then I think about what the future has in store for me, and all the things in the past I've overcome and I realize that sinking into a pit of despair just isn't an option any more. "Make IMPOSSIBLE your favorite word" right? So I make a pact with myself today to get myself out of my impossible hole and change my life (in all aspects not just health). I am a grownup now and I can't keep hiding under a rock or stuffing my face every time I'm faced with adversity. I need some better coping mechanisms. I need to learn how to keep that balance I finally found. I want out of this holding pattern I am in and back to that place right up on the edge of it all. I want to find my feet again and feel that free feeling like I did when I was 10. Sigh. Maybe I should go out and play with them at recess………..

I am very proud of myself, oh avid readers. I'm truly coming into my own right now. But I still have a long way to go. And I don't always like the choices that are in front of me. I'll get there in the end though, that much I know is true.

Okay, back to the grindstone it is! Have a fabby, fat-free, day!

FGS

A Little Inspiration.....

2008-04-16T06:35:00.003-06:00

Okay -- a woman winning the Biggest Loser, that's some pretty dang good inspiration. And Ali is just a plain old inspiring girl to begin with. So yeah Ali! Her victory is certainly getting me moving this morning.

Then my punk friend Daddy C told me he decided to run the London Marathon a few weeks ago. And he just did it. Yeah, just decided to run it. He is a bloody fitness freak and I'm so impressed. Especially because I knew him when he was still a bad influence.
So thanks all you inspirations! You ROCK!!! And now I feel like a slacker and need to go to the gym........

And that concludes this get-off-yer-ass-and-move public service announcement!

FGS

ps. I have no delusions of running marathons or become and insane fitness freak like Ali. I'm just in total awe of what they have accomplished.......

Super Sunday Extravaganza!

2008-04-13T13:52:00.005-06:00

How can you go wrong with a blog title like that?

So here I go with a whole lotta random!!!!!!!!

First a shout out to the WW girls who just plain old rock! Your comments and support, the fantabulous tidbits of advice, and the great topics of conversation you bring up on the boards have been priceless in keeping me real, keeping me sane, keeping me laughing and keeping me thinking during this journey... thank you, thank you, thank you. And thank you for reading my blog!

Yesterday I stumbled across a new blog, Gettin' Shrunk, which really got me thinking again about this whole process of weight loss and just where I could be if I made it a priority again in my life. Don't get me wrong, the time with HBB was a total horkfest but if I'm honest with myself, and that's what I need to do more often, I started slipping a few months before he got here. Not crazy slipping, but just enough to minimize my shrinkage. Heck, I get 50AP's a week and I can't manage more than a pound of weight loss per week -- there's got to be something up with that! And that something is called Fat Grl's loosey goosey method of counting points. As always, I'm not totally paying attention. Is it realistic for me to lose more than 5 pounds a month? Maybe not. My body seems to be comfortable losing at this speed. So, I'm going to stick with being happy at my 5 pounds a month. But I'm going to reexamine my daily points intake, the foods I'm eating (sigh, veggies and fruit have gone a bit by the way side in favor of gas...). I can do this -- it just has to be my priority again.

Which brings me to my new lifestyle change. I'm gardening! Okay, I've always gardened (with mixed success). Now it just makes sense to put some actual effort into it. And I have this massive backyard!

I grew up on a farm (the family commune in Vermont, more specifically...) and I've always loved having fresh veggies from the garden. So why not do it in an urban setting? For the last couple of years I've grown tomatoes in pots and herbs but this year I'm ready to expand a bit. Due to a massive financial crisis in my world (sigh, what's new?), it might have to start small and get bigger later on. But I'm all about herbs and tomatoes this summer. Too bad you can't grow fresh mozzarella!

This weekend I also spent a lot of time looking at how to reduce my debt (blah!) and more efficient ways to be green, self-sustaining (who knew you could raise chickens in downtown Denver!) and methodical with my meal preparation. I may have been living under a rock but I just heard/read about this book called Once A Month Cooking. The premise is simple -- once a month, you cook up a storm and freeze what you've made for future eating convenience. In this time of money woes, what a great way to save money and time. How come I've never heard of this before??? I guess I've sort've been doing something like it -- just not planning it out ahead of time. It makes a lot of sense when you think about it. You always have a main dish in your freezer and just have to add salad and other sides. Easiness! This site also has heaps of information on how to do it as well as recipes that work well. So financially this is good and healthwise this is good. What's better than coming home for dinner and it's already made? Less chance of ordering out for pizza!!!

Now I just need a new freezer for all these pre-made meals and fresh veggies...

In other news, I have a new addiction!

Muffins. Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, muffins! Yup, muffins!

Last weekend I made these super yummy banana bran muffins (yeah, I know ewwwwww bananas and bran! but they were hella good!) and I'm addicted. This weekend I'm making Whole Wheat Pumpkin Cranberry muffins. Super yum. Oooh and I just had a thought -- I'm going to chuck in some Benefiber when I bake this batch. Hey why not! Nothing wrong with fiber...... So why am I so addicted? Well for starters muffins are yummy and these banana bran muffins are super delish and don't taste healthy at all. Second, they make a fantastic afternoon snacks before the gym. Or at least I think so. I've been having a muffin and sugar free applesauce about an hour and a half before I go to the gym.

Yummy 3pt Banana Bran Muffins
(adapted from an Eat me, delicious recipe)

2 cups bran cereal (bran flakes work just fine, as does Kellogs All Bran)
1 1/4 cups skim milk
1/3 cup raisins ( I used golden)
3/4 cup all purpose flour
1/2 cup whole wheat flour
1/3 cup sugar
1 tbsp baking powder (might want to use 2 tsp instead...)
1/4 tsp salt
2 tsp cinnamon
1 tbsp ground flax seed
1 egg
1/4 cup vegetable oil
1 banana, mashed ( I had two small bananas so I used those...)
1/3 cup chopped walnuts or pecans ( I used pecans and not quite 1/3cup)
1/2 cup coconut (sweetened)

1- Preheat oven to 400 degrees. Spray muffin tin with cooking spray, or line with cupcake papers.

2- In a large mixing bowl, combine bran cereal, milk and raisins. Let stand for about 2 minutes to soften the cereal.

3- Stir together flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, cinnamon and ground flax seed in a small bowl. Set aside.

4- Into the softened bran mix stir the egg and oil. Beat well. Stir in the banana and walnuts. Add the flour mixture, stirring only until combined. Divide the batter evenly into 12 muffin cups.

5 - Bake about 20 minutes or until golden brown.

Makes 12 nice sized muffins.

Check out Ochef for some great tips about how to cut fat and when you should keep it when you are baking.

And that is about it for my Sunday randomness. I have a date with the dishes in my kitchen...and the laundry....and the floors.....

Love ya,
FGS

Big Fat Sigh.........

2008-04-09T07:00:00.003-06:00

Yeah it's Thursday! And I can't stop stuffing my face...... Okay, so stuffing is a bit of an exaggeration. But I think I jumped back into this healthy lifestyle of mine a wee bit too quickly without thinking it through. The past has taught me that when you try to get back on track with both your eating and exercise at the same time, life becomes difficult.

Maybe that's just an excuse.

Maybe I just need to get over myself and stop eating like it's going out of style.

At least I'm back at the gym! Three more sessions with PT and then I'm on my own. Am I freaking? Just a wee bit. But, I can do this.

"Where have you let yourself down?"
So Tuesday night on the Biggest Loser, Ali said something very profound -- I know, crazy but still. When look at a poster of herself and how she was before she lost 99 pounds, she said "Where have you let yourself down?". Okay, so she said it way better than that but that was the gist of it. Letting yourself down. Sigh. I've been doing a lot of that lately. Not in my personal life, no no. But certainly when it comes to living a healthy lifestyle and losing weight and getting exercise, I've been slacking. I have been letting myself down. Period. I think sometimes it's easy to slip back into old habits. But, and here's the big BUT, now I actually catch myself when I'm slipping not after I've totally slipped and wallowed around and begun a pity party for myself. Makes me think that maybe I haven't really let myself down when you really think about it. Because at the end of the day, I haven't given up on me. I'll never give up on me again.

Side Conversations
Yesterday a good friend of mine and I had a long chat about this annoying coworker of her's that is on one of those low carb diets. This coworker has made a point of being obnoxious about how much weight she's lost and just how tough her diet is, etc. etc. I don't know why people have to be sooooooo annoying about their diets -- maybe because they want support and want to feel good about their success. Sure I'm guilty of looking for those external supports too. I mean, who hasn't asked if their ass was looking better. At the end of the day though, to me it is a much better compliment when someone just says how good you are looking without you having to ask for the compliment.........
I am also going to refrain from giving my opinion on low carb and other super restrictive diets because I think what ever works for you, works. But I will add my two cents on lasting weight loss success. I wonder just how people who are on crazy restricted diets can make it year after year after year when they are only allowed a limited array of foods to eat. I mean, I have willpower and all folks but living the entire rest of my life without a glass of red wine or a bowl of ice cream?!?! That's just unthinkable. I'll be the first to admit I get jealous when people come in saying they've lost 5 pounds during the week or are having heaps of success. My journey has been slow and less gratifying. I'm stronger than I've ever been and that is a huge victory. So, I'll keep reminding myself though that I'll take my 4 pounds a month weight loss. Slow and steady wins the race, right?
Another friend of mine just started Slim for Life. She had previously done WW and hated it because she had to count points. Now she has to weigh in two time a week and eat a very restricted diet. I remember when I started Jenny Craig. I lost heaps and quickly because it was so controlled. Guess what peeps? I gained it all back plus ten pounds. Why's that you ask? Well, because I never learned to a)take personal responsibility for what was going into my mouth b)to cook and prepare meals and foods that were good for me and not prepackaged and c) to fix the underlying reasons of why I'm an emotional eater to begin with.

So I wish these ladies success in their diet adventures. I'm sticking to my slow method.

And that's all the news that's fit to print! Sigh, yes I am Little Miss Whiny Pants right now......... I'll get over myself sometime soon!

FGS

Back to the Beginning....sort of.

2008-04-06T14:58:00.002-06:00

Alright, so not really the total beginning. But, another beginning none-the-less. I like beginnings. I like when things can be rewritten. I also like gorgeous sunny spring afternoons in Denver. Gotta love the Mile High when spring is in the air.

Today I am revisiting this post from not too long ago to remind just exactly where I am going. I'm not so super off track.

Part 1: 9 months to get to that goal of 10 pounds from goal weight. I'd like to be at my goal weight by Christmas.

Currently I am approximately 40lbs from my goal weight. How can I say approximately, you ask? Well, I'm moving into uncharted territory here. I haven't ever really known a weight where I felt healthy and good and could easily maintain. So I've decided to give myself a ballpark weight -- once I hit this weight, then I think I can reevaluate the situation and decide what my true happy weight should be. So you won't hear me saying I want to weigh x number of pounds. Ever. I've got a general goal, and then I'll go from there.

Part 2: On the fitness front, I'm working on the 10k thing. But because of my knees and feet I don't think I'll ever actually run a race. It would just hurt too much. I can still do it on the treadmill though! I think I need reminding that a)I've already come very far in this quest to get healthy and b)it's time to step it up a notch again. With the ending of my sessions with PT this seems like the perfect time to start thinking about my life and health without someone holding my hand. I want to try some new fitness classes too. That's a new addition to my list.

In these last few weeks of lurve and excitement, my fitness goals went by the wayside. But, things in that department have settled down a wee bit and I think it's time for me to remember exactly what I'm doing. Unlike the past, I have gotten my derailed mess back on track faster than before and without seriously crazy weight gain. I did gain about 5 pounds during these past two weeks. I am incredibly frustrated by this because I lose on average 4 pounds a month. So I know I will have a lot of hard work ahead of me to melt these pounds off. But I can do it. Yeah, I really can.

I think one of the things I'd like to start including in this blog is either a daily or weekly wrap up of my training sessions. Just to keep myself more accountable. I have been realizing in these last two super-slacker weeks just how much having PT has kept me motivated. I've found more excuses NOT to go to the gym this past month than I have in the last year. All that changes on Monday! It's back to being fit FGS for me. I like fit FGS -- she's much happier, way more radiant and less cranky.

So here's my question to peeps in blog land. Got any great sites for circuit training or workout planning??? I've learned a lot from PT but I am always up for something new!

Alright I'm wrapping this up with my three goals for this month.
1)Track my exercise/workouts here at least once a week.
2)Get back OP with WW and track my points.
3)Back to the gym 5 -6 days a week.

If it is written in black and white, I can't cheat, right?

Love and sunshine,
FGS

I <3 HBB........

2008-04-03T20:06:00.004-06:00

Okay, how cheezy was that?

I drop off the face of the earth and that is all that I can come up with for a title. Man I have lost my blogging mojo!

Well, I'm back. Eating chocolate as I type this and wondering just how much more it will add to the 6 pounds I gained over the past week. Let me tell you folks, I enjoyed gaining them. As you may know, I had a visit from a certain Hot British Boy (HBB). Yeah, who knew, right? So he came to visit, we ate too much, and I'm terribly twitterpated! But all you can eat buffets at casinos are never a good idea despite whatever else you are doing to burn off those horrendous calories! Buffets are evil... but on a side note, and small moment of pride, I did eat heaps but I didn't just plow through all of the crap I put on my plate. For the first time in forever I didn't eat food just because it was there.

Of course, I'm in the PMS, pity party phase of my month right now and I've had more chocolate and EEK! Ben and Jerry's in the last few days than I have in all of last year. It's doing wonders for my body let me tell you. I guess I hadn't realized how sensitive I'd become to sugar and such. Ooooh it throws me out of whack! I can just feel my skin crawling right now after my consumption of chocolate Easter eggs -- you know the kinds with the hard shell, but not the M&M hard shell? Add to all of this that HBB has come and gone and won't be back until July (WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!!!!!!) and I'm a walking disaster.

At least I have pinpointed my major dieting/control issue. I am an emotional eater folks. Who knew? I am having a really hard time getting it under control right now. (Side note: next time HBB is here, we are eating better. Period. Now that I know he loves me and I don't have to woo him with my cooking!) I've felt this way before, that's for sure -- but I'm not so sure I've ever really figured out a good way to get it back together again. Sigh...lots of deep breaths, methinks.

On top of all this, I only have 4 sessions left with PT. A few weeks ago, I was dreading this -- now, I think I'm actually ready. I really think I've learned what I need to. I think I disappointed PT because I didn't lose weight as fast as he wanted me to. I think he's given up on me to be honest. It kind of pisses me off. But then, I guess just like we can get wrapped up in the scale, others can get wrapped up in their measures of success. I've certainly gotten a lot out of my time with him and I know that I will have a hard time pushing myself as hard as he pushes me. But I certainly will be able to manage! As a teacher I should understand this -- that there is always a point when your student is ready to go out on their own. It's time. I'm sick of him, he's sick of me.

And let's face it peeps, I can't afford it any more. Even more to the point, I guess I'm at a point where I need to figure out what exactly it is I want from this. I've certainly turned my life around these past few months. Now I'm back at that point where I need to set goals and revisit where it is I want to go. Hmmm, you mean you were meant to actually assess these things from time to time???

Yes Fat Grl, you are.

Ahh, yes well maybe that's my problem! That assessment/readjustment piece.

It's getting late though so this is going to have to wait until manana.

It's good to be back..........

TTFN,
FGS