The Coaching Journal

Your Financial Thermostat

2009-07-11T08:00:00.000-07:00

Oprah Winfrey’s and Donald Trump’s is set to “Billionaire”

Where is yours?

What I am asking is “Where is your financial thermostat set?”

We all have one and it is set for “Poverty”, or “Struggle”, or “Striving” or “Not Enough” or “Millionaire” or “Billionaire” etc.

When it is cold in your home in winter you set the thermostat on high so that you get and stay warm.

In order to keep money flowing well through your life you must set your financial thermostat to “high”.

Wealth and abundance either are or are not in your life because of your financial thermostat.

Take a look at your life to see where your thermostat is set. Your beliefs and thoughts about money are evident in the life you live and your surrounds. You either struggle to pay bills or you easily write checks and do not have any concerns about “making ends meet”.

Your financial thermostat is hardwired into you like a master blueprint. You follow that blueprint every moment of your day, keeping yourself at the level you have decided you are “allowed” to live financially. You can have a poverty consciousness or a wealth consciousness.

When you have a poverty conscious it means that even if you receive an inheritance or win the lottery, you ultimately end up struggling to pay the rent or mortgage because your beliefs and thoughts about money are so low that you do things to remove the money from your life. You set your financial thermostat to “Not Enough” or “Poverty” or “Just Getting By”.

Resetting and Raising Your Financial Thermostat
This is not acceptable to people who want to be successful. What you want to do is reset your financial thermostat by changing your money blueprint. You want your financial thermostat to be set at “Midas Touch”.

Again, Donald Trump was more than $2 billion in debt at one point, but once again, as we have known him to do, he was back on top with an estimated net worth of $5 billion. That is because he has his financial thermostat set for “Billionaire”: he thinks and believes he deserves billions and he knows he will receive it. He does not give up when there are obstacles and he has no doubt about being a billionaire. It is the level of money what he desires to have in his life.

When you reset your financial thermostat for “Midas Touch” you may have financial setbacks but you will cruise through them and regain or surpass your high financial setting.

To reset and raise your financial thermostat you must examine the childhood beliefs you have about money – you financial blueprint.

We are taught some rather sick, weird and false things about money as children – things such as “money is the root of all evil”, rich people cannot go to heaven”, “rich people are greedy”, “being poor is holy and means you are closer to God”, “having a lot of money means you have done something bad”, “rich people are crooked”, “you can only have money is you work very hard”, “money doesn’t grow on trees” etc. Worse yet, we are taught these things by people we love, want to be friends with, or admire.

By believing these things you have set you financial thermostat to “Scarcity”, “Poverty”, “Not Enough” and other money-dissolving levels.

As an adult you can change your money blueprint and reset your financial thermostat by doing the following:

First, create a new blueprint in which you are the mastermind of your financial life. Name yourself as a Winner, Hero and see yourself as a positive and successful person.

Second, substitute old, tired, limiting beliefs with empowering, positive affirmations that you SAY ALOUD such as:**

I can be, do, and have anything I desire
Money works hard for me
I always have more than I need
I live in an abundant universe and I deserve all it offersI am an excellent money manager.

Money brings good things into my life

**Do this specially for the next 40 days

Third, commit yourself to being financially successful. State the level of prosperity you desire, the amount of money you want in your life on an annual basis decide that no matter what, you will achieve it. Know that you are a Money Magnet.

Fourth, keep a Prosperity Journal and write down every penny, nickel, dollar etc that comes to you in any form/ Then tell the Universe you are grateful for it, and feel that gratitude in your heart.

Fifth, associate with great, positive, successful people. Read books, attend seminars and spend time with like-minded people. Do not spend time with people who are negative about life and specifically negative about money. You must surround yourself with people who encourage you to believe in yourself, in being successful and in being rich. If you are around people who give you the silent treatment, or strange looks, or outright negative comments when you talk about your financial goals, get away from these people. You will notice they have financial struggles and a low financial thermostat setting of “Not Enough”. By being negative in these ways, they are attempting to make sure you stay right down there with them. Sometimes they have the audacity to laugh at you and question you as to why you would think you can have wealth in life when they have known you to be poor. They do not want you to be successful, even if they say they do.

Success is Yours
Now that you have decided to change your money blueprint, and both reset and raise your financial thermostat, you will see change. You are set for “Wealth”, “Millionaire”, “Billionaire”, and other high financial settings”

Be happy about this and keep moving upwards.

If you need assistance in working to rest and raise your financial thermostat, coach with me and get the partnering, support and empowerment you need to deal with your poverty consciousness, and transform it into a wealth consciousness.

To your success!

Barrett

Using the Law of Attraction To Get a Mate

2009-07-09T08:00:00.000-07:00

Human relationships are challenging. A mate relationship is especially challenging because it is two people growing and changing and journeying wit each other as they do it. Such a relationship gives us a taste of the divine feeling of knowing God, of being loved as an individual human being. Yes relationships can be heavenly!

The hardest part is actually making contact with the person who brings you into a state of bliss. What people commonly want to know is how they can attract a SPECIFIC person that they dream of as their mate.

Can you manifest a relationship with someone specific? The answer is yes and no.

On the "yes" side of the answer, there are two ways in which you could do this. One way is if the other oerson is ambivalent about what they wpnt and you employ your creative powers to specifically manifest this person. However you might not like what the relationships consists of when they arrive because you can manifest the person, but you cannot force them to be the type of person you want them to be. You get the person, "warts and all". Are SURE you want that person?

The second way you can attract a specific person is if that person also wants you and wants what you want. This can occur even if they are not conscious of it. But beyond this it would not be possible because you cannot manifest another person's reality without their will and participation.

On the "no" side of the answer, you cannot mgically force someone to fall in love with you and stay with you forever. Even if you could, that is not love, and love is utimately what you want. You want someone who actually WANTS you and WANTS to be with you because of who you are.

What you are actually desiring to expereince, as I stated earlier, is the presence of God in your life, through an intimate relationship. You want to manifest comfort, peace, love, and security into your life.

The key is to stay focused on the positive feelings that a loving relationship with "someone" will bring us, rather than staying focused on forcing a relationship with a specific person. The right person will then manifest into your life.

If you would like do do some relationship coaching to gain the tools necessary to manifest a good relationship, contact me!

To your relationship success!

Barrett

Outrageous Living -- Learning to Live on More

2009-07-06T05:36:00.000-07:00

When people are tightening their belts, home values have dropped, the stock market has plummeted and credit is nearly impossible to find you know it is necessary to make changes. However, just because we live in the New Normal era, your mind should not be focused on living in poverty. Your mind should be focused on living in abundance and outrageously so. You can make that your goal and make it happen by taking certain steps.

You may think this is impossible but that is because you are not accustomed to thinking in the Certain Way necessary to achieve success. How can you actually live abundantly when there is less? How can you enjoy the pleasures of life when there is a global financial crisis?

Here is how:

Make lists. You must make three lists. The first one is income and expenses. You need to know what is coming in and going out so write down your income and then list your major basic expenses in detail: food, shelter, loans, utilities and guess what percentage of your income goes to pay those. The second list should contain those same expenses and what percentage you desire to spend on those items. The third list must show exactly what actual percentage is being spent on those items. If the third list does not match up to the second, adjust your spending.

Use savings. If you have money put away, now is the time to take out some. To assist with monthly bills and a few small indulgences which are worth paying for even in a tight economy.

Eat well. Limit dining out to once a week and use the money you formerly spent on it to buy a basic cookbook, one of your favorite type of food, and ingredients for making fabulous dishes at home. Before you go shopping, eat well and make a list, so you do not make impulse purchases. You can eat the leftovers for lunch the next day or as starter for something else. In fact, pack delicious lunches for yourself.

Drink at home with friends. There are many discount beverage stores. Go to one and buy the sparkling water, teas, beers, specialty coffees and alcohol you like at much cheaper prices than at a regular store or bar. Invite friends over to make it a social event and put out some snacks.

Enjoy the Summer. Pack a tasty picnic lunch and go to the park. Do most of your cooking on the outside grill (fish, meats and vegetables) and serve cold vegetable and fruit salads. You can also make pasta and other things outside that require being heated in a heavy pot if you grill is big/strong enough.

Use the park’s natural running paths and soft grass for exercising. Yoga, tai chi and other martial arts can be done outdoors. Exercising on a mat on the grass gives is good cushioning and running on dirt is better for your knees than running on cement. It certainly is more scenic than a treadmill.

Make sure you go outside everyday for at least an hour and get some sunshine because it raises your serotonin levels and that makes you feel quite happy and able to see the possibilities of the day!

Stay warm in Winter. Put on the thermal underwear, flannels and sweats to keep personally insulated, then turn down the thermostat. Keep up with your full rent or mortgage payment and communicate with the landlord or lender if you need to make an adjustment.

Take regular bubble baths. Relaxing the body reduces mental stress and expands your ability to better enjoy life. You can purchase cheap bubble bath gels, bath salts and oils. You can also use homemade bath salts that can be made inexpensively (1 cup Epsom salts, 1 cup sea salt, 1 tablespoon of essential oils or perfume, and if you like, some food coloring). You can even make a large batch of this in your kitchen and put it in jars to give as gifts to friends.

Be touched. We need our bodies to be touched in order to thrive. It slows down our blood pressure and brings us inner peace and relaxation. Look in local magazines for discount coupons on foot massages and reflexology or full body massages at massage training schools. Check around for inexpensive nail salons. I know salons where you can get both a manicure and a pedicure, in a clean shop, for $20.

Take an Asian vacation. Keeping your mind focused on peace and the positive is easy to do when you take an Eastern direction. Use a DVD or find a free class and learn yoga, tantra, or tai chi – or all of them. Practice them at least 3 days a wee. Listen to soothing oriental music (can you hear the woodflutes?).

Host movie night. If you are not already a member, join an inexpensive service like Netflix and or run to the local video store and get 2-3 DVDs. Make some homemade popcorn and invite friends and family to join you for movie night.

Use free pleasures. Speaking of movies, take advantage of the free DVDs, CDs and books at your public library. You pay for them with your taxes so why not indulge?

If you would like partnering and support in changing your mindset so that you can change your life (get financially free, enjoy life more, become more creative, be abundant and more) start coching with me today! Coaching is $1200 for 3 hours to use as you desire.

To your success!

Barrett

Do You Push Too Hard?

2009-07-04T07:00:00.000-07:00

This was the year you were going to manifest more money into your life, exercise more and lose weight, get a better social life, buy your dream house, find a job, get the money to attend your family reunion, get rid of your clutter, eat better, take a decent vacation, etc.

You decided what you wanted, visualized, acted as if had had already received what you wanted.

In the end the result was… NOTHING.

There has been no strong flow of money into your bank account, your closets are just as disorganized and cluttered, you cannot afford a ticket to your family reunion, you have gained 10 pounds, your dream house is nowhere in sight, you are unemployed and you do not have a good group of friends.

Everyday you try harder. You ask yourself why it is not working when you are trying so hard. You ask yourself why, if you are doing everything right, is it not working? Why do you not yet have what you desire?

But…could it be that the answer it you are trying too hard? Trying too hard reveals that you are impatient and in that impatient you want circumstances and people to be to be different. You are too attached to that demand. It is revealing you are resisting change by accepting things the way they are. At this point you start focusing on what you do not want. You are trying too hard to be perfect.

You then begin resisting these feelings and being frustrated because things are not perfect. This feeling of imperfection is energy that is blocking what you want to manifest because that that energy of perfection is RESISTANCE.

By resisting the natural flow of people and circumstances you are operating against the natural and universal Law of Allowing.

The Law of Allowing says that when you let energy flow on its natural course it will eventually be attracted to you and flow in your desired direction. In order to allow this natural flow you must not push against it.

Change feels different. Different can feel uncomfortable. It is like putting on new clothes from the store. Things are a little stiff at first but you quickly adjust and see how good the clothes look on you.

Change means we must stop resisting and start allowing.

STOP RESISTANCE. START ALLOWING

How do you put and end to RESISTANCE and start ALLOWING what you desire to come to you?
Surrender. Abandon the fight. Stop demanding that you know everything, have everything, and look picture perfect while doing everything “just right”. Stop telling yourself you are too busy and learn to appreciate what you have already done, sit down and relax!

When you open yourself to receiving instead of resisting your body and mind relax. You lose the fight or flight response of defensiveness. You stop being impatient with people and angry about the lack of visible appearance of your desire. You become aligned with the Universe and what you desire manifests easily because you are letting the Universe take care of it, instead of you trying to control it. In practical terms this means that you allow people the freedom to be who they are and circumstances to be what they are. You do not “wage a war” against them, fight or resist, even passively. To do so means you are trying to change them.

You are not here in this lifetime to change anyone. We are a diverse world. When you try to change others you create the opposite of what you desire. Accept others as they are; accept that others believe differently than you do. The only person you can successfully change is you. You can change how you relate to other people and how you relate to circumstances.

By changing yourself and the way you relate to people you modify the way they relate to you because you are transforming the energy flow between them and you. By changing the way you feel about and deal with circumstances you change the relationship between a situation and you, because you change the energy. In accepting others as they are, you allow them to grow and to learn for themselves. The Law of Allowing loves diversity!

Diversity is not perfection. Diversity allows people to be themselves.

When we feel resistance to not doing our best, that is, to not being perfect, we can decide to not do our best – and some of us will then do nothing, feel guilty about it and lose our passion.

When you put forth discouraged, depressed, passionless energy like a deflated balloon, you get back from the Universe that same vibration – uninspired, passionless results that you do not want.

When a situation is not what you want you can choose to maintain your joy and your peace or feel impatient, angry and frustrated. You cannot change the circumstances. You can only change how you feel about the situation. You can choose to feel positive about what you have and what you are able to do. You can choose to feel good about the lessons you are learning through the circumstances taking place. You may not have a plane ticket to get to your family reunion but you can transform the energy of the situation for yourself by visualizing how wonderful the reunion will be for everyone attending and feeling happy about that. You can visualize yourself 20 lbs thinner and wearing smaller clothing sizes. You can focus on the ways you can be the kind of person you would like to have in your expanded social circle.

You have the power to allow everything you want to come into your life.

To your success!

Barrett

(If you would like speed up the process of mastering your life and allowing what you desire to manifest, starting coachng with me. Spend 3 hours [$1200] and transform your life)

Coaching and Positive Psychology, Part III

2009-07-03T10:25:00.000-07:00

In this third and final installemnt of a series on coaching and positive psychology, I take a look at the future of the two professions. As mentioned in the first installment, I feel it is safe to say that in the New Normal era in which we are living, there will be an increasing amount of people seeking coaches as they pursue and navigate their changed worlds.

(The material in this post is copyrighted material excerpted from my academic work, with all rights reserved by me and there is no permission to reprint it in any form)

Barrett

Coaching and Positive Psychology, Part III: Future Perspectives

by L. Barrett Powell

There are several aspects of coaching and psychology that have future implications and aspects, including 1) the theoretical relationship between coaching and psychology, 2) the professional relationship between the fields of coaching and psychology and 3) the development of coaching as a profession

Although psychology, like coaching, was initially viewed with suspicion and considered to lack credibility in its first few decades of existence as a profession, it is now a recognized profession which has established itself through the establishment of academic credentials and rigorous training, internal ethical codes and barriers to entry, and in some cases has external government- sanctioned organizations which can “police” the profession.

Psychologists are not uniquely competent and qualified coaches. People without academic degrees in psychology are able to be competent and qualified coaches. Some of these coaches are nationally or internationally known, and have no academic qualifications in psychology – Anthony Robbins, Martha Beck, Jack Canfield, Lisa Nichols, and John Asaraf. The great majority of coaches, of course, are not “famous”. Over the last few decades people have become more attuned to a need and “right” to be pursue happiness and live happy, fulfilling lives. They are turning to coaches, rather than to psychologists, psychiatrists and therapists for this accomplishment. Psychologists, psychiatrists and therapists are viewed as professionals whose services you need if you are mentally ill or diseased and need to become healthy. In fact, the psychologist, psychiatrist or therapist is required to view the person as a patient, and diagnose them with a mental disorder in accordance with the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) in order in order to receive insurance payments and for record-keeping purposes. Coaches are viewed as professionals whose services you engage when you are already healthy but want to achieve more or certain goals in your life. In terms of a future trend, I think we will see an increasing number of people hire coaches to achieve their life goals, rather than going to a psychologist, because people recognize they are not mentally ill; rather they desire help in having a more satisfying life.

However, there is clearly likely to be an increased alignment between coaching and positive psychology as this subcategory of psychology addresses the purpose and process of coaching. Other branches of psychology such as cognitive are more likely to be used in terms of guiding how some coaches may conduct individual sessions. However, a psychology which has as its base the assumption that the client is mentally ill, unhealthy, diseased and/or in need of a cure, will not appeal to basically healthy individuals who want more life satisfaction.

Where is the profession of coaching heading in terms of certification? A certification organization is able to provide initial and ongoing professional training, as well as ethical codes, but is certification necessary or valid? Who will determine the validity? Individual coaches may make independent choices on whether or not to join a coaching organization and which one to join. Membership is not mandatory in order to be a competent and qualified coach. Membership is also questionable in credibility. Take the case of the American Medical Association (AMA). A medical doctor in the USA may join the American Medical Association (AMA) but it is considered natural for all doctors to do so, but is not a requirement in order to practice medicine nor is it proof of competency and qualification. This is exhibited by the fact that by the end of the 19th century, US physicians had formed two national associations: the National Medical Association (NMA) and the American Medical Association (AMA). This peculiar duplication reflected a profession segregated by race. The AMA was almost entirely white and discriminated against qualified non-white physicians; the NMA was predominantly black and founded in reaction to the exclusion of black physicians by many state and local medical societies and the AMA's refusal to recognize several racially integrated societies. This professional segregation endured from 1846-1968, well into the civil rights era. Thus, how valid was the AMA while it was excluding qualified potential members based on the color of their skin? Such discrimination in some form could theoretically happen in the coaching profession if the psychology profession takes over certification of the coaching profession. Using this example, it is clear certification is not an automatic panacea for those in the psychology field who want to regulate coaches and coaching.

Coaching will be difficult to regulate in the next 5-10 years (I will not speculate much beyond that time frame). With very well-known individuals (such as those named herein) being recognized as coaches, in addition to thousands of lesser known individuals, it will take a significant effort to shrink the number of coaches and regulate the field. However the nature of the profession may accomplish adequate self-regulation as ineffective coaches will not be successful in the field because clients are clearly able to tell if they have achieved goals or not.

Coaching and Positive Psychology, Part II

2009-07-02T10:08:00.000-07:00

In the second part of this series on coaching and psychology, I continue to examine the connections between coaching and positive psychology.

(The material in this post is copyrighted material excerpted from my academic work, with all rights reserved by me and there is no permission to reprint it in any form)

Barrett

Coaching and Positive Psychology, Part II
by L. Barrett Powell

Coaching is clearly a method through which human beings learn, thus it is educational. Through learning, human beings self-actualize. Coaching has ties to both learning and psychology in that1) the human psyche is engaged in the learning process and 2) the goal of coaching is to assist people in both goal-setting and goal attainment which subsequently results in increased life satisfaction.

Positive psychology with its roots in humanistic psychology, appears to have an advantage over all other schools of psychology in terms of a theoretical background for coaching. The coaching process involves educational psychology (situated learning, for example) because of the collaborative effort to empower the client to learn new things in the pursuit of goal attainment. Analytical psychology can inform the coach as to the nature of the coaching relationship, particularly on a transcendent level. Cognitive psychology (and narrative psychology, for that matter, although not included in this research project for reasons of delimitation) can provide guidance in terms of procedural ways of conducting sessions. Positive psychology, with its roots in humanistic psychology, however is a psychological theoretical approach which most closely matches coaching’s belief that the client is basically healthy and whole but simply needs assistance in overcoming obstacle to fulfillment and satisfaction. Coaching is above all about human growth and change. Rogerian principles are therefore central to the success of a coaching program. Where most therapy is focused on resolving deficits and weaknesses in the direction of restoring a person to functioning, coaching is a process focused on working with a person’s needs, wants, goals, or vision for where they want to go, and then designing steps for getting there. What humanistic therapies and coaching share is the idea that positive change is a driving force for clients in either modality. It can be summarized that in relation to coaching, positive psychology, with its roots in humanistic psychology has three primary relevant and defining characteristics:

a relational emphasis as the fundamental source of change

a holistic view of the person as a unique being

a belief in the possibility of freedom choice with accompanying responsibility

There are valid connections between the practice of coaching and the field of psychology which lend a valid and relevant psychological theoretical framework to coaching as a method of human learning and self-actualization. Those connections are based in psychological processes which take place during learning, as learning is a byproduct which results when a person being coached seeks to attain the goals she/he has set in coaching. Those connections are also based on positive psychological processes which take place through the goal setting and attainment. Positive psychology as a subcategory of psychology has a clear applied and theoretical connection.

Coaching can be used as a psychological tool in manifesting human potential (self-actualization) through its process of goal-setting. When a person is happy, content and experiencing a high degree of life satisfaction, she or he is a stronger, healthier contributor to her or his relationships and to society at large.

Coaching and Positive Psychology, Part I

2009-07-01T09:48:00.000-07:00

As we progress into the 21st century, one of the predicted life trends of the New Normal era which IS occuring is a significant growth in the profession of coaching. The pre-existing profession of psychology has arisen in the dicussion about coaching, as people in the psychology profession have grappled with people's decision at times to undertake coaching instead of therapy. Questions have arisen about whether coaching is really therapy that should be regulated under various psychology professional laws or whether it is someting that cannot be categorized as psychology. It has also been suggested that there is a middle ground. I have written an published academic research on the subject of coaching and one particular new branch of psychology which is called positive psychology. In this three-part series I will share with you some of my academic work.

Barrett

Coaching and Positive Psychology: Roots and Connections
by L. Barrett Powell

The modern school of positive psychology is rooted in humanistic psychology. Humanistic psychological theory, as proposed by American psychologist Carl Rogers is a person-centered approach. The humanistic approach is founded on an optimistic view of the person. Psychologist Abraham Maslow posited the theory of in natural self-actualization in human beings, believing that all organisms have an underlying tendency to self-actualize. In this theory, when the context allows, people will choose what is good for them because they can experience fulfillment or happiness, which culminates in enduring efforts to evolve and grow. (Stober. 2006: 19-20) A defining characteristic of the humanistic perspective is the holistic approach -- the emphasis on viewing people holistically (range of human experience): Individuals must value the full range of human experience: our physical, cognitive and affective or emotional, realities. (Stober 2006: 24-25) A humanistic approach takes into account individuality (uniqueness of the individual): If we accept that we construct reality from our perceptions and make sense of our perceptions in individual ways, then each person is a unique individual. If the client is a unique individual, then the relationship between practitioner and client must also be customized. There is no “one size fits all” approach in the humanistic approach. (Stober 2006: 25-26) The humanistic approach holds that there is a fundamental importance of the relationship between practitioner and client as a source of change (collaboration in the practitioner-client relationship): there must be active engagement of the practitioner in facilitating the client’s own awareness of how they experience themselves, their situation, what it means, and where they want to go with it. Stober 2006: 20-22) In the humanistic view, people independently have freedom of choice in how they respond to their environment. This independence is not a simplistic notion of complete autonomy; instead it is making choices within each individual’s particular context. Finally, humanistic psychology posits that human beings can make their own decisions (availability of choice): this view theorizes that we are unable to avoid making choices that influence our current and future selves. Choice implies a degree of freedom but is accompanied by the responsibility to be aware that in any given moment a choice is being made. Cultivation of this recognition is central to a humanistic approach. (Stober 2006: 26-27)

Positive psychology focuses on examining and comprehending how positive emotions work to improve normal life, rather than focusing on mental illness. Positive emotions are central to psychological thriving and have been found to have a significant impact on increasing intuition and creativity and widening scope of attention.

The heart of positive psychology lies in the practitioner’s choice to shift away attention away from pathology and pain and direct it toward a clear-eyed concentration on strength, vision, and dreams. (Stober. 2006: 220)

Research by psychologist Barbara Frederickson of the Positive Emotions and Psychophysiology Lab at the University of North Carolina shows that positive emotions boost other psychological functions; for example they empower individuals to open up their focus of attention and see the “big picture”.

The research on what does and does not lead to happiness has significant implications for coaching:

it suggests there is a role coaching can play to help people make upward shifts in their happiness set points

very small increases in positive emotion can tilt the overall balance and lead to significant differences in the extent to which people flourish or languish

it has implications for understanding the ephemeral impact of success and the so-called American Dream

Throughout the 20th century psychology was developed to measure and address human pathology. In the latter part of the 20th century and now in the 21st century there is a movement toward evolving and expanding psychology to include tools, interventions and research methods to address human strengths and virtues. Effectiveness studies of positive therapy is showing it to be very effective and with prolonged impact. (Stober. 2006: 221)

Stober, Diane R. (2006) Coaching from the humanistic. In D. Stober and A. Grant (eds) Evidence Based Coaching Handbook: Putting practices to work for your clients. Chichester, Wiley

Stober, Diane R. and Grant, Anthony M., .eds (2006) Evidence Based Coaching Handbook: Putting practices to work for your clients. Chichester, Wiley

Are You Committed?

2009-07-01T06:04:00.000-07:00

Hello!

Are you committed to your success?

I am!

I am committed to empowering you to be successful in life and content while doing it.

Let's partner together today as coach and client and transform your life

Sign up for 3 hours of coaching that will change your life! Use the time in 30, 60 or 90 minutes as you choose. We meet on the telephone at mutual convenience.

You get an improved life! Tell me how I can help you and then let's get doing it!

Coaching w/Barrett (3 Hours - $1200)

To your success!

Barrett

What To Pay Well For in the New Normal

2009-06-30T02:19:00.000-07:00

Here are six areas, especially during the New Normal era of financial crisis and recession, where it benefits you to lay out more money, not less. Following this will help you get on or stay on the path of success:

1. Expert Advice
Now is the time to hire a life coach and get your entire life on a successful track. Now is the time to hire an attorney, tax advisor or home-buyers agent. Now is the time to be realistic and admit you do not know how to get out of the rut you are in or that you do not know how to handle particular transactions. Now is the time to admit you do not know how to get the best deal in a home-buying situation. Now is the wrong time to skimp on expert advice for significant matters.

You simply need to pay their fee and get about changing your life.

Sadly, I have had people (usually people with plenty of money but bad financial management skills) try to negotiate lowered coaching fees. Some tried negotiating low payment plans hoping they could get everything they "needed" in one or two sessions and so they could renege on the remainder of the payment agreement. They never got the positive results they needed from the expert service of life coaching and are today in the same rut.

Now is also the wrong time to think you can get free Internet information in order to make decisions on things that are complex and/or will take a significant amount of time. When you act cheap, you get cheap (you get what you pay for!). If you think reading some articles online will replace hiring a coach, attorney, tax advisor etc, you are sadly mistaken.

Not too long afterwards you will realize you are in the same, if not worse situation than you were because you would not make the investment in yourself.

2. Investments in You
You think things cannot get worse but they could. The way to prepare for that without over-stressing is to put away some savings every time you get paid.

In fact, pay yourself first before you pay bills.

If you can set up a payment plan at work do it. If you can set up direct deposit of your paycheck and automatic purchase of bonds or payments into savings accounts, do it. Then you live off the remainder of the money.

3. Getting Financially Free
The experts tell us that it is vital to get financially free by monitoring your bills, and paying down your debt.

This is vital in so many ways because money has an effect on all areas of your life.

Staying on top of your bills means that if you are having trouble making payment, communicate with the lender and try to work out a new payment plan. You must make them aware of your situation.

4. The Best Price
Start learning to clip coupons and look for sales. A boon of these global economic times is that stores are constantly lowering their prices and having sales.

Do not try to negotiate individual businesses and businesspersons (see #1) to lower their prices for their services. That is trying to cheat them and it will leave you without the service you need or backfire in some other area of your life. Remember, you do not need to cheat others of drive a sharp and unfair bargain in order to have something in life.

The place where you look for the bargains are the large stores that are now offering prices that still leave them profit but which no longer have the 4x-5x profit on top of the basic costs.

Here is where Internet surfing can save you money. Spending 30 minutes on line and save $50-$80, depending on what you buying – and you should only buy what you need!. You not only get your goods less expensively, you “get paid” for your coupon shopping.

5. Small Indulgences
If you deprive yourself all day everyday, you are going to grow resentful and overspend out of your emotions. You can prevent that by leaving a little room in your budget for a small pleasure such as a $5 café mocha, or a $12 manicure.

Doing this pampers your soul and empowers you to feel hopeful about things getting better.

6. Self-Services
Think about how your time is best spent. Should you spend 6 hours cleaning your apartment or home or pay someone to do it while you do something else that you need to do?

Is it better to pay someone to shovel the snow from the driveway or risk falling down and harming yourself?

Decide which services enrich your life and make room for them in your budget, as with the small indulgences.

To your success!

Barrett

Eight Qualities of Successful People

2009-06-29T07:31:00.000-07:00

#1: Balance
When you are imbalanced you feel tense, uncomfortable, and lack peace. Because of this you cannot find inner harmony and make decisions from a calm state of being. You consequently regret decisions you make while imbalanced. To exist in a state of balance is to be calm, stable and in a centered place where you can apply the right amount of emotion and rationality to make sound decisions and judgments.

#2: Harmony
Harmony is an inner agreement integrating understanding, emotion and conduct. It is evident in an obvious congruity between what you think, feel, say, and do.

#3 Joy

Joy is a constant state of well-being and contentment.
Joy is not happiness. Happiness comes and goes with circumstances. Joy is a constant and results from being in balance and harmony with yourself. Joy exists internally even when external situations are not what is desired. Joy results in being an approachable person. It results in being open to new situations and remaining optimistic when there are challenges. Joy sees possibilities and alternative solutions. Joy results in the courage to face the future.

#4: Courage
Courage is the capacity to face uncertainty, challenges, pain or danger and deciding to continue with your chosen course of action. Courage empowers you to speak your truth in the face of opposition.

#5: Generosity
Generosity is about giving people more than they give you in exchange and knowing when to do it so it benefits both you and the other person. It is not about giving of you time, emotions and money and getting nothing in return. It is about having the power to understand that what you are giving is coming from a source beyond yourself and you are the human vessel through which it is being given. You do not give what you do not have. You give out of your abundance, time, talent and money through your heart. You give out of love, not guilt, embarrassment or obligation. You feel enriched through the giving, not depleted.

#6: Organization
The universe needs a clear path into your life to bring in abundance and wealth. Organization is the ability to keep things in such an orderly sate that you know how to retrieve anything and everything you need. This means you have a filing system for your important documents, your money is organized within your walled and you know exactly how much money you have in it at any given time, your books are organized and stored on shelves, your car is clean and not being used as a storage bin or garbage can, your closets are organized and neat, you have all the resources you need to keep your home, car, and business clean, and you take responsibility to put things back in their place when you are done with them. You also clean out your closets and shelves on a regular bass to make room for new things. Wealth eludes those who do not care enough to stay organized. The organized person both starts a task (book, project, assignment etc), and finishes it. Organization includes cleanliness and order and is a powerful character marker.

#7: Wisdom
Wisdom is a combination of self-knowledge, intuition, education and experience. The wise person is able to make sound judgments because self-knowledge gained has been gained from the other six qualities -- balance, harmony, joy, courage, generosity, and organization. You tap into your self-knowledge and your core beliefs, and draw upon your intuition, education and experience. You choose to what is right and best rather than what is easy.

#8: Excellence
Excellence is the cumulative portrait of a confident and accomplished person who has incorporated the other seven qualities into her/his life. This is a portrait of a person who is in control of her/his destiny. This is a person who is going places – a some great places they will be!

If this is the kind of person you would like to be, coach with me to gain the skills and get the support you need. Coaching is $1200 for 3 hours to use as you desire.

To your success!

Make the Most of Each Day

2009-06-28T09:44:00.000-07:00

"I wish I had been kinder"

"I wish I could tell her I love her one more time"

"Why didn't I give him a hug when we last saw each other?"

Statements like these are so common after tragedy strikes. We think about how we could have made a little more effort and shown a little more love, compassion, care etc. if we had only taken an extra moment or two.

Life gets so very busy and we find ourselves wrapped up in the tiny details of life.We become concerned about the little things in life. In some sense they are important -- we want our spouse to not leave his dirty underwear on the bathroom floor, our children to wipe their feet before they come intothe house and our roommate to not eat our leftover Chinese food.

It is also true that it is important that our spouse realize he needs to not live like a filthy frat boy who expects a maid to clean up once a week, our children need to slow down at times and remember to be easy on the carpets, and our roommate need to be respectful and not eat food she didn't buy.

These small things can lead to BIG arguments and those heated exchanges can involves words and actions we may regret.

We may refuse to hug our child, kiss our spouse or we may think about throttling our roommate.
But what is the extraordinary and unusual happens and while separated that day, that other person is seriously injured or killed. Or if that does not happen, we take the negative vibe of that conversation and let it affect the remiander of our day. Our day and/or night goes downhill.
I urge you, to put things in perspective. Say something about the issue and try to work out a plan to live together and not drive each other crazy -- then drop it. Do not take the negativity into the next moment. Intentionally search for something good to say and/or think about the person and focus on it. Tell that person you love her, give him that hug and gently and jointly decide how to handle the communication between the kids and you.

Focus on something good in that day and take it with you. Make the most of every day you have because you never know how many days you or the people in your life have. Your next moment could be your last memory, so make it a good one. And when you awaken the next day and all is still secure in your world, be thankful.

To your success!

Barrett

Looking to improve your relationship life?

2009-06-25T08:07:00.000-07:00

Sometimes we need help making our relationship life better. If you would like help with this, I can recommend someone who is a master in the field of relationship coaching, Audrey Valeriani. Here is a brief message from her:

Barrett

Audrey Valeriani - Relationship Coaching

As Someone Who's Been There, I Can Help You Change Your Life!If you are someone who is not happy with your life because of failed relationships, or who doesn't have any direction, or who feels lost for whatever reason, my innovative tips and advice will help you take steps to overcome your current situation and change your life. They key is to learn how to examine and improve your self-esteem -- which directs our choices in life and affects all areas of our lives -- which will improve all of your relationships, and also allow you to set and achieve goals! Check me out now! http://www.bootcampforthebrokenhearted.com/

Are you resolved to making your life better? Filling it with joy? Savoring every moment? Improving your relationships?

WELL THEN JOIN THE R.E.A.L. WOMEN’S CLUB (for women who respect, encourage, appreciate, and love themselves).

Your R.E.A.L. Women’s Club Membership includes:

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Monthly Newsletter
FREE coaching, downloads, and handouts
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EMAILS and mailings with inspirational articles and stories about women like you
YOUR STORY and IDEAS posted on http://www.theaccidentalexpert.com/
PREFERRED GUEST for upcoming web and live events
RADIO APPEARANCE on The R.E.A.L. Women's Club radio (coming soon)
PLUS, monthly prizes, free gifts, and lots more!

Join Today!

Check out my website for more: The Accidental Expert

Dating and the Midlife Woman: The Cougar?

2009-06-24T13:59:00.000-07:00

It made debut weekend box-office records and surprised people: the new romantic comedy The Proposal. It features 44-year old Sandra Bullock in the starring role, and her on-screen love interest is 32-year old Ryan Reynolds. Bullock even has her first nude scene, something she did not do in any of her on-screen roles during her 20s and 30s. The messge is that “even" in her 40s, a woman is “hot”. The publicity around the film, however, makes no mention of Bullock’s and Reynold’s age difference and the studio would not talk about it in an interview.

Demi Moore and Ashton Kutcher. Goldie Hawn and Kurt Russell. Susan Sarandon and Tim Robbins. These are a few of the more prominent (and successful) real-life known pairings of midlife women and younger men. The women in these real-life relationships are now being labelled as “cougars”.

A New Label for Women
Labeling people and putting them in categories is a common way of dehumanizing them, of not seeing them as human beings, of objectifying them. Once you have an animal or object labeled, especially as an animal or mythical/fantasy entity, then you have them under control and contained. They are simple, not complex as are real humans. Now, you can decide what to do with them and you need not treat them with the respect and consideration you would give a human. Women have historically been categorized as in generalizations such as the symbolic triumvirate of The Virgin/Saint, The Mother and the Whore.

Cougars do not fit into the first two categories. That leaves Whore.

Defining the Cougar
But what IS a cougar? A cougar is generally considered to be a woman of 35 or older who seeks out romantic or sexual relationships with younger men. She is supposed to be an overtly sexual woman over 35 who seeks out men for sex – but doesn’t want commitment, cohabitation or children. The term “cougar” implies predation, manipulaton, cunning behavior, sneakiness, and attacking. It implies a woman is an animal with sharp claws, a deceitful nature and a creature who is sex-starved or over-sexed.

Some related definitions I came across are “cougar-juiced” and “cougar dens”.

“Cougar-juiced” is a term men use to describe having been (successfully) preyed upon by a midlife woman..and “juicing” her is the ephemism for the man’s sexual conquest of her

“Cougar dens” are parties arranged for the purpose of putting together midlife women and younger men for sexual hookups.

Looking at these common definitions and ascriptions, is the “cougar” what women 35 and older want to be -- not a human being with a life, but a sexually predatory animal who is driven by sexual organs and desires and having sex that she “should not be having”?

There are no special terms for single, sexual men. They’re usually just called men. If a man meets a woman and has sex with her he is praised as “lucky”. Single, sexual men tend to be categorized and praised in terms of their job status, their income, their sexual power and their sports achievements. If a 47-year old man is dating or having sex with a 28-year old woman he is lauded for sexual virility and power.

Single, sexual women are labelled derogatorily in terms of their sexuality. The labels infer that for midlife women being sexual is not societally acceptable and normal. It is inferred to be an aberration, unnatural, and not something positive, healthy and human. Midlife woman are viewed in terms of a negative sexuality. It is not so long ago that women were considered to be sexually dried up, void, unsatisfying, unsatisfied and dysfunctional by the time she reached the age of 40 and/or was unable to bear children. She was likely someone’s wife and if she was having a fulfilling sex life she was not fulfilling the expected role of Virgin/Saint or Mother. She was left with The Whore label, whether spoken or unspoken.

The Midlife Woman in the Media
Is the “cougar” a media-created and media-driven trend that will fade from view? Could the “cougar” be extinct by Summer 2010?

Popular television shows like Sex and the City, Brothers and Sisters, Damages and The Closer portray midlife women as confident, intelligent, attractive working women with personal and professional lives. There is a new television show called Cougartown, in which Courtney Cox portrays a sex-starved housewife (although the media whisper is a prediction of early cancellation). There is also an upcoming reality dating show called The Cougar.

The Hollywood film industry jumped on the bandwagon last year, opening Summer 2008 with Sex and the City: The Movie, a film which garnered the largest opening in history for a film centerd solely on women. This seems to be continuing with several films for Summer 2009: In My Life in Ruins, there is no mention of age difference as Nia Vardalos (46) seduces Alexis Georgoulis (34), In Cheri, Michelle Pfeiffer (51) enjoys a romantic and sexual relationship with a man, Rupert Friend (27), who is nearly half her age. The film The Rebound, centers on a May-September dating relationship between Catherine Zeta-Jones (39) and a 25 year old man. In Julie & Julia, Meryl Streep (60) plays real-life culinary superstar Julia Child while the younger Stanley Tucci (49), portrays her husband.

Real-life Midlife Women
Women ages 35 and older as a group are more confident, pre-occupied with their lives, busy working on their careers and not consumed with giving up their lives to support a man in his pursuit of his goals and dreams. They are more relaxed in their bodies and comfortable with their sexuality, not letting it be dictated by men and men’s fantasies. They are not centered on trying to look like a supermodel or Playboy bunny. They know their bodies and their minds and do not get confused and forget who they are because a man pays attention to them. They generally know not to listen to what a man says rather to, instead, watch what he does.

In real-life, a significant number of men prefer the midlife woman between the ages of 35 and 60 who is somewhere between approximately 10-20 years older. What is appealing to these men is the stability of an older woman and the confidence, the lack of game-playing. The modern midlife woman also tends to be very young at heart because midlife has evolved, and the consequence is women ages 35 and older have better and more life options. Midlife women living in developed nations in today’s world have access to better healthcare, more control over their bodies and their sexuality, and better exercise options

Your Relationship with a Younger Partner
If you are a midlife woman age 35 or older, you understand that you are not an animal, not a mythical or fantasy creature, not driven in life by your sexuality. You understand that you are a complex human adult female with a job/career, family, friends, choices, challenges, opinions, interests, and yes, a sexuality.

Choosing to be with a younger male partner is like choosing ANY male partner, including, what challenges you two might face regarding, for example, financial or healthcare issues; and what roles you allow the media, your family and you friends to play in your relationship.

Two areas I mentioned, namely healthcare and finances, are ones in which you will want to be especially attentive, as you will want to ensure that you remain financially in control of your resources. Women still do not make an equal income compared to men and any assets you have should be protected. Money and love have nothing to do with one another so do not assume the love you feel today will keep your money safe tomorrow. Women live longer than men and more senior citizen women live in poverty than men. Think about your retirement and guard your future. As far as healthcare, remember that as a midlife woman you have special issues and need to take good care of your body as you approach or go through menopause and other related and unrelated aging issues.

Remember, the midlife woman is a human being, not an animal (cougar) and she is in control of her private relationship with a younger man.

And if all indications are true, the “cougar” media-hype trend will be extinct or at least hardly noticeable in the next year or so, and the relationships will endure. Just ask Susan and Tim, Demi and Ashton, and Goldie and Kurt.

To your success in life!

Barrett

Thriving in the New Normal

2009-06-23T12:45:00.000-07:00

It was the best of times, and well, the best of times, to borrow from Charles Dickens.

The Age of Excess was birthed with and developed by the Baby Boomer generation, a 20th century generation with higher rates of participation in higher education than previous generations and an assumption of lifelong prosperity and entitlement. Baby Boomers, born between 1946 and 1963, are the biggest and richest generation in known history, and some would say they have finally and quite naturally received the reward of their greedily squandering resources and for their belief that the historically unparalleled global financial wealth was their birthright and not something they should protect and regenerate for future generations.In fact entitlement became a keynote of this group of people as they took the helm in leading businesses, companies, ventures and all areas of life worldwide. They boomed in power and wealth and expected never to face the lives of economic struggle, or even moderation.

Botox and bling-bling came to be considered an entitlement in life. People embraced a life of massages, manicures, hair extensions, expensive designer clothing and shoes, and the latest designer perfume.

Then the bubble burst, the economy tanked and now we find ourselves living in an era that manyexpect tolast for decades to come -- and era called the New Normal.

You can read more about it AND about what you can do to more than survive in the coming years. Learn the S.N.A.P. technique and thrive!

You can buy it as a paperback book for $9.99 or download the e-book for $5.00

"Thriving in the New Normal "(paperback and e-book)

To your success!

Barrett

Free E-books for Success

2009-06-12T08:56:00.000-07:00

Here are some freebies for you that you may enjoy using and adding to your "library".

They are free e-books to assist you in achieving your success:

The Principles of Successful Manifesting

Empowering Affirmations

Meditation E-book

The Astonishing Power of Gratitude

If you would like 1-1 coaching to better apply the things you read and speed up your success in life, sign up for coaching and let's get started TODAY!

Barrett

Two Steps Missing from "The Secret"

2009-06-11T14:37:00.000-07:00

I have come across something that I think you should know about, soI am sharing it.

I know many of you have been working hard on manifesting what you desire.

You're doing everything recommended in The Secret. You've experimented with Cosmic Ordering. You've learned about Quantum Physics and the Law of Attraction. You are changing your mindset thorugh coaching.

With everything you've learned about manifesting, you should have EVERYTHING you want in your life right now.You should be a "Manifestation Mistress/Master".

But you're STILL not getting results as quickly and as great as you would like, right?

That's because you've missing TWO SIMPLE STEPS.

Two unwritten techniques that NOBODY talks about. These little-known tricks will AMAZE YOU. I want you to learn about these techniques to increase your success!

Bradley Thompson knows these two hidden techniques. He's manifested a dream lifestyle over the past twenty years - and he knows the TWO MISSING STEPS that "The Secret" doesn't tell you.

He'll prove to you that manifesting works brilliantly -- BUT ONLY when you follow his six step system . The Quantum Cookbook

Not only that, he'll hand over $150 if it DOESN'T work for you. I urge you to learn more.

Learn about the Two Missing Steps - TODAY!

Enjoy,

Barrett

Success Requires Action

2009-06-07T05:11:00.000-07:00

"Only those who dare to fail greatly can ever achieve greatly" ~ Robert F. Kennedy

“Success is connected with action. Successful people keep moving. They make mistakes, but they don’t quit.” ~ Conrad Hilton

If you want accomplish anything in life you must commit to it and commitment means taking action. Those who sit on the sidelines and do not achieve their goals in life are the ones who choose not to commit. Those who do not commit are the ones who choose not to ACT.

There are people who are afraid to say or do something "wrong" or to not have the support of people willing to settle for being mediocre, so they do nothing. Often those same people criticize, malign and gossip about the other group of people. They try to convince themselves and the object of their criticism that they are inferior. The other group of people are those who not only study and prepare, but move forward, take risks, seize opportunities and put their energy into accomplishing something. These people are people who may make mistakes along the way, but they do not quit and eventually they succeed. These are successful people.

Thomas Edison failed to make the lightbulb 99 times (while people criticized him as fool, crazy and stupid) but he succeeded in inventing the lightbulb 1 time -- and that was all that was needed!

There are people who are afraid of passion -- which is the core of genius! Then there are those who are passionate and achieve great things in life, travel to many places, meet many new people, experience many new things, and enjoy a good life. They may, again, fail occasionally or run into obstacles, feel discouraged or alone but they get up and try again and eventually succeed. They succeed because they ACT.

It is natural law in this universe that if want to achieve something you must not only ASK and BELIEVE that you will RECEIVE; you must ACT in ways possible to facilitate what you desire.

What we humans can CONCEIVE we can ACHIEVE. Marconi conceived of humans talking to one another through the air. His friends were prepared to put him in a mental health hospital because they considered him crazy. However he achieved it and we have the radio. Edison conceived of the lightbulb and today we have it. One US president conceived of humans walking on a far away planet called the Moon and we have done it. Conflicts and enmities are settled because people gather their courage and choose to meet each other to settle differences. One man, Henry Ford, conceived of humans riding in a horseless carriage, to the laughter and disdain of many people. They had to eat their words when he built the automobile.

It took ACTION for these things to manifest.

Will you sit on the sidelines being mediocre and fearful, criticizing and maligning those who are different from the crowd and have the passion to achieve dreams, or will you make the most of your human potential and choose to ACT? Will you risk laughter, criticism and big failure on the way to great success? Success does not come to those who do nothing. It generally does not come to the mindless who do not study and/or prepare (yes there are those wild exceptions). It comes to those who dare to keep risking failure and choose to ACT.

Wishing you the best success!

Barrett

(If you want to be successful and transform your finances, relationships, career etc., start coaching with me today. Sign up for 3 Hours for $1200 and let's partner to your success!)

Today's Economy -- Crisis or Opportunity?

2009-06-04T01:13:00.000-07:00

Everyday the Internet, television, radio and newspapers report a worsening economic situation and people read or watch while hyperventilating and getting depressed. That is, most people. We no longer live in the Age of Excess of the 90s/early 21st century. We now live in the New Normal era and the glitz and glam are gone.

There are some people who are sitting back and viewing this situation with calm. But they are not glued to the bad news day in and day out. They are living outrageous lives of prosperity, not worrying about how they will make it from day to day.

Did you realize that during the Great Depression in the USA not everyone suffered? Not everyone is struggling now. Many people thrived during the Great Depression and many will thrive now in this current global economic crisis. The difference is in how you react to it.

How you choose to react makes all the difference. The Law of Attraction, a universal law that applies to everyone, makes this clear. If you are focused on poverty, strife, crime and negativity, (therefore filling your subconscious and conscious minds with it) that is exactly what you will attract in your life. That is the life you will live.

I recall the day I learned, really learned that the rich and the poor think differently. The rich think in terms of opportunities and the long-term. The poor focus only on the day to day. Which one are you?

Obviously, it is the long-term vision that gets you on the track to success. But then how do you live everyday? How do you deal with each new event in the current situation?

You focus on the now and your sphere of influence. You focus on what you can do within that and look for solutions. When the dark moments arrive, light the candles. Make a fire in the fireplace. Get the oil lamps lit. Start a bonfire. Just because the electricity is not working does not mean you have no options at your disposable.

Once you have the light back, get back to doing what you must to keep things going for you and for your family and if necessary, for your company and your employees. Stay open to possible solutions – these are the opportunities.

You should also stop filling your mind with negativity. Stop watching the news, reading the news and listening to the news late at night. I once visited with temporarily with someone. But I visited for a lot shorter time than they or I would have liked, because I found it maddening and depressing that they had the TV news blasting for THREE hours every day – including during dinner. That is, if you count only weekdays, 15 hours of NEGATIVE NEWS per week, and one-third of it is taken in while trying to eat!! Talk about indigestion.

It is not being informed; it is not intelligent; it is not wise to take in all that negative news of war, economic strife and disaster, crime, etc.

What we view and read forms images in our mind. It is important to guard your mind. Fill it with positive images and thoughts. Read literature about success and prosperity and those who have achieved it. Find things online which are edifying, not stories about someone’s pain and strife and how the world is on the verge of collapsing.

If you are keeping your personal road well-lit, looking for an opening in each seemingly “closed” situation and filling your mind with positive news ad events, you will thrive in the current economic crisis because you will have transformed it from chaos to opportunity.

These kinds of economic times are also perfect for taking the time to get more education. To that end, I encourage you to sign up with me for coaching. You will learn the principles and laws of success and how to apply them to your life and your specific circumstances. You will learn how to successfully thrive through “hard times”. You will make strides in your personal and professional life. Coaching is the way to get not only education but person support in applying what you are learning.

If you would like to get started today on a better life, sign up here on the blog or on the website. You get 3 hours of coaching to use as you determine (30/60/90 minutes) depending on your needs and our mutually convenient scheduling. There is homework and I will partner with you to challenge you to be your best. The cost is an investment in yourself of $1200

Wishing you continued success!

Barrett

Empowering You!

2009-05-28T08:19:00.000-07:00

You are powerful.

That is shocking to hear, isn’t it? In fact, if you are like most people, you are working hard right now to prove that it is a false statement. But I will say it again, because it is true:

You are powerful.

You are Mistress/Master of the Universe and have the entire Universe at your beck and call. The only thing you need to do is to focus on something and the Universe gives it to you. You have been exercising this power all your life and are doing so right now.

Yes, you are consummately empowered to create your world, your life, in exact alignment with your feelings and thoughts. What you desire, what you want, you visualize. You feel strongly about it, and you make it manifest because your envision it. What you envision becomes reality.

You may be wondering how this can be when negative situations and people have appeared in your life and some things have not gone the way you would like them to go. You want riches, great relationships but have financial struggles and rocky or non-existent relationships However, it is YOU who brought this into being; it is you who is in charge.

How can this be?

It is your determined desires, combined with your passion that your focus upon in your mind. You get focused on something – whether you like, love fear or loathe that thing or person – and you draw that person or situation into your life by staying focused on it. If you only envision not being able to pay for things, struggles with money, and arguments with a person, that is all you get. The Universe does not evaluate whether you do or do not want someone or something. It simply knows you are focused on it so it moves to align with your thoughts and feelings. You bring everything into alignment by adding passion and clear focus. The Universe knows you are passionately, powerfully focused on this person or outcome, and in concert with your vibration brings your dream to you. You then begin living the dream!

Because this is how the Universe works, it becomes dangerous to invest your emotions, your PASSION, in negative people and negative outcomes. It is dangerous to stay focused on negative people and negative situations. If you want good things, then expect good things. Put passion into a dream of abundance, harmony, love, good relationships, great finances, a thrilling and interesting career etc. Do not make it hard – confidently see yourself achieving these things easily and quickly. Something interesting occurs: Life happens – and it happens the way you envision it.

I remember when I first thought about traveling to Europe. Born in the United States of America and having spent my childhood and college years not too far from home, I had only read about Europe in books and seen it on the news as a distant place. My family had panicked when I moved out of the state. Soon they were to feel that panic even more intensely because I got the bright idea – no, the brilliant vision – that I could visit Europe. I was going to cross the Atlantic Ocean!

I decided I would spend a summer in Europe, visiting several countries. I decided that while I would not travel extravagantly, money would not be a problem. For 18 months I cut out photographs of the places I wanted to visit, and collecting travel brochures and magazines from travel agencies. I asked people who had gone to Europe what they recommended that I visit. I saved all my change. I cut back on my food budget and eliminated my clothes budget. I read books about the places I wanted to visit and watch films shot in those countries. I saw myself walking the streets of Paris and Rome. I saw myself in Copenhagen harbor by The Little Mermaid. I saw myself dancing a waltz in Vienna and hiking near Salzburg. I saw myself in Munich and walking through the Black Forest. I saw Buckingham Palace standing before me and the changing of the guard. I saw myself staring at authentic Botticelli paintings and the colored houses of Nice as well as the beautiful beaches along the Mediterranean. I spoke of my impending trip every chance I could and that was almost every conversation because I was excited!

Eighteen months later where was I? Europe. I had a marvelous time that summer and took photographs of things that awed and charmed me as well as brought tears to my eyes and made me laugh with deep joy.

After that trip I decided I would no longer be solely a citizen of the United States of America but a citizen of the world. I decided I would live part of the year in Europe and perhaps some other place and that I would get my Ph.D. in Psychology in Europe.

I now live part of the year in Europe, where I am studying towards my doctorate in psychology.

I desired, envisioned and got passionate about traveling to, and then about moving part-time to Europe, and it became reality.

When you FOCUS your PASSION, you increase the POWER of your MAGNETISM. This is you creating your LIFE, your DESTINY.

By focusing with clarity and passion you draw to yourself what you desire and you create life on your terms. That is power.

That is powerful.

YOU are POWERFUL.

Use that power well!

*******
I can be reached at lbpdkcoaching@gmail.com if you would like to discuss working together to help you make your life even better than it is, and to design the life you would like to live! You can sign up 3 hours of coaching for $1200 to use when ever you need

Barrett

Living the Dream!

2009-04-23T09:37:00.000-07:00

Living the Dream!

You hear people say it and you read the words of others who write about it – but are you DOING it?

Are you living the dream?

More specifically, I have two questions: first, do you have a dream or dreams, and second, are you ready to live your dream(s)?

My friend Abby and I were driving to the beach the other day and talking about her youngest daughter, Chloe, who is three years-old. Chloe is exuberant with life! She bips and flips from one moment to the next, and from one subject to the next. She is very clear about the things she wants. As we searched for a parking space, Abby and I were discussing dreams, spirituality and related topics.

“Chloe completely trusts in the universe. Whatever she wants she gets” I said.

Abby smiled.

“When she wants ice cream, she gets it”, I said, “That’s because she has complete faith that she can have whatever she wants. She does not know the word “NO” and won’t until it gets repeatedly said to her in life. She only knows the power of YES”.

Abby smiled again.

“See, when Chloe asks for ice cream she KNOWS she will get it because she asked. She can see the ice cream, taste it, feel it”, I continued.
Abby laughed.

“When she asks her father for ice cream, she has absolute confidence, and she gets it, doesn’t she?” I asked.

Abby smiled again and replied. “Well…she doesn’t usually get ice cream when she asks for it”.

My curiosity was now piqued.

“That’s because her father gives her chocolate instead”, Abby said.

I laughed loudly.

What a wonderful example of the universal Law of Attraction in action! Not only does little Chloe live in a world where she gets ice cream when she asks for it, if she does not get that, she gets something else she likes just as much, if not more, chocolate. Failure is not an option, for Chloe, and therefore success is not only her dream, it is her reality.

This is the kind of belief we all must and can have if we want success in life.
Chloe, with the innocence of a child, and the accompanying unwavering faith in the universe, follows the ABCs of the Law of Attraction:

Ask
Believe
Collect (receive)

She does not put up obstacles of doubt and disbelief to what she wants. She does not concentrate on the possibility of not collecting what she wants in life. The result is that Chloe gets what she wants – ranging from ice cream, candy, and books to toys, clothes, shoes, having books read to her when she desires it and getting to watch the children’s videos she likes.

hat would happen in your life if you took on this mindset and chose to live your life this way?
What would happen if you chose to not only dream, but to LIVE the dream?

The possibilities are endless and the realities could be spectacular!

Abby has a teen-aged daughter, Chrissy, who would like to go to a particular high school in another city. All the roads leading to making this happen seem to be closed or fraught with obstacles. But Abby has decided to work with me on a plan to get her daughter Chrissy into that school. Because it is Chrissy’s dream, we have put her at the center. In a moment, I will share with you how we will do it.

Remember, when you make the choice to not only dream, but to LIVE the dream….

The possibilities are endless and the realities could be spectacular!

With this in your mind (and your mind is where it all begins), I want to challenge you right now, today, to take up this challenge and join my Law of Attraction experiment. This experiment will take one year. You can start as soon as you finish this article. Here, in short, is what you will do:

1. Write or type a list of your dreams
2. Decide what steps you will take to make them happen
3. Make something visual that represents your dream and put it where you can see it
4. Create reminders and read them aloud
5. Be thankful for everything that occurs
6. See yourself being/having/doing whatever it is you desire now, even though not visible
7. Approach people and situations with enthusiasm and passion

I want to emphasize Steps 3, 4 and 7 on the list because they are major keys to being successful in this experiment.

Make something visual. By this I mean make a collage with pictures you cut out of magazines or find online…or you can create something very personalized by taking a photograph of yourself. I said earlier we are planning to do something with Chrissy’s dream of attending a certain high school. Therefore, we are driving to that high school and taking photographs of Chrissy in front of it and on the grounds. Those photos will be printed and Chrissy will put them up on her wall as her personal visualization board. Do you want to drive a certain car? Get to a dealership and ask them to allow you to sit inside one and take a photo of you.

Create reminders. By this I mean go to your email, your cell phone and any other form of electronic communication you have. Go in now and set up daily or weekly reminders such as “I am abundant”, “I am a student at X school”, “I have the car of my dreams”, etc. When the reminder pops up, read it aloud to yourself before deleting it. You will be affirming what you want several times per week.

Approach with enthusiasm and passion. By this I mean get excited about life. For some people it is “fashionable” to be sarcastic and never show any surprise, exuberance, excitement, wonder or passion about anyone or anything. Ever notice these are NOT happy people? They do not enjoy life nor do they have an enjoyable life. Life is meant to be enjoyed. Having and expressing passion about the people and situations of life shows the universe you are thankful and it aligns your energy with other passionate people who can and will support you in achieving your dreams.

I also would like you to share here on this blog, your list of dreams and your progress, as you go along over the 12 months of your participation in this Law of Attraction experiment. I will be sharing mine, too!

My final suggestion for this experiment is that you hire a coach to support you in this next year. Give me a call or email me; or contact someone else – but find and hire a coach who coaches Law of Attraction and can give you the support you need as you pursue and achieve your dreams.

I can be reached at lbpdkcoaching@gmail.com if you would like to discuss working together to help you make your life even better than it is, and to design the life you would like to live!

Barrett

Good News -- An Ode to Optimism

2009-03-24T06:15:00.000-07:00

I have said it before, written it before and meant it before --your life is what you make it. You create reality. You create the world in which you live. You do that with your thoughts, which affect your vibraiton.

If you are only taking in negative thoughts, you will not find yourself living in a very positive and fulfilling world. Sure, there is a global financial crisis happening -- but your life can be at peace.

How?

Focusing on the good, focusing optimistically, will go a long ways towards changing your world. That is basic universal Law of Attraction. Fill yourself with positive things and radiate positive energy, which magnetically draws positive things to you.

One of the ways to do this is to take in good stuff. That mneans stop listening to so much breaking news that it is breaking down your spirit. Take in enough to feel prepared, and then start surrounding yourself with good news.

One example I want to point out to you is Ode Magazine. It has some upbeat and real news stories that are not making it onthe nightly networks and the 24-hour news shows.

Check it out and get back to me with your (positive) thoughts!

Dear Universe

2009-03-04T14:11:00.000-08:00

Dear Universe,

I am writing to say a big THANK YOU!

There are so many things for which I am very grateful and I want to express it:

I am grateful for my good health.
I am grateful for waking up each morning.
I am grateful for being able to sleep in my comfortable bed each night.
I am grateful for having a safe, secure, and warm place to live.
I am grateful for daily protection.
I am grateful for my education.
I am grateful for being able to experience different cultures.
I am grateful that I am uniquely me.
I am grateful that I have wise people to advise me in my network.
I am grateful for having good food to eat.
I am grateful for the clean, warm and comfortable clothing I have to wear.
I am grateful for having a computer that works.
I am grateful for having friends to meet for tea.
I am grateful to have friends with whom I can share a home-cooked meal and some laughter.
I am grateful for friends and acquaintances around the world who love me and pray for me.
I am grateful for my professors at university.
I am grateful for my family.
I am grateful for the possibility to meet new people.
I am grateful for my work.
I am grateful for unexpected opportunities.
I am grateful for receiving what I have asked for even though I have not yet. I know it is coming.

My life is fantastic and I have been places, done things and had experiences that reveal how great a world I live in!

Thank you! Thank you for all that is coming to me in answer to request and prayer. Thank you for the feelings of expectation and excitement about the good things coming to me. I can hardly wait to see how you give me what I have asked for – I know it may or may not be in the way I asked for it to come, or by whom, nevertheless, IT WILL COME.

That, dear Universe, is awesome!

**************
What are YOU thankful for? What good things can you find in your life? Take an "attitude of gratitude" and post a reply about the things for which you are grateful!

Bookmark this post and come back every time something comes to mind that you can express gratitude about! Maybe you will post once a day or once a week, but do share it with us!

Emotion: The Key to Being, Doing, and Having

2009-03-03T14:37:00.000-08:00

I spend my time generally between two places and I have come to notice something significant in my personal and professional (coaching) life. Winter, especially late winter in (Copenhagen) Denmark is harsh. This is in great contrast to my home in San Diego, California (USA) where the Sun is shining or at least it is bright most days, people are out and about in the winter months exercising, taking classes and visibly energetic. Back here in Denmark, a beautiful little country in which to visit or live, I should add, the winter is challenging. By late winter it has been months of weather that is cold, windy, icy, snowy, rainy, grey, devoid of sunshine most days and daylight has been in very short supply. People smile very little. It seems there is more political infighting in the government, more fighting between the police and the youth/alternative lifestyle groups, and more proposals of laws against youth or “outsiders” in winter. People rarely smile. The weather promotes quick walking with one’s face down, pushing against the rain or snow being blown at you. A lot of beer and alcohol is consumed in order to feel good. People’s faces look sometimes tired but mostly blank. In the media and among people with whom you converse, it is not uncommon to hear about depression and stress. It is as though the life has been sucked out of people for a few months.

Not uncommonly, in the circles in which I move, I therefore stand out. Why? Because I smile – in fact I smile so much it is the expression on my face when I am not conscious of it because I am smiling inside. I am a “morning person” and do my best work and have my best energy in the morning until early afternoon. I also have had life circumstances and a spiritual journey that has made me grateful for each day I awaken with the ability to appreciate and enjoy everything from awakening in a cozy bed, being able to take a hot shower and put on a change of clothing to having the energy and ability to walk to a train, take notes in a meeting, spend time chatting with someone I encounter or exercising at the gym. My days are good. I achieve much of what I want to achieve in life. Friends and acquaintances here comment on my attitude and energy, amazed about it.

When I have a meeting with people, or teach or coach someone, this same attitude pervades our interaction. I consciously bring this energy, this EMOTION to our relationship, to our time together. It is my effective weapon against what in Denmark is called Janteloven or Jante’s Law/The Law of Jante.

The term, Janteloven, was coined in the work of Danish author Axel Sandemose in 1933 in a novel entitled “A Fugitive Crosses His Tracks”. In the story, the main character commits a murder when he is a young man, and the conformist values of his hometown of Jante are viewed as responsible for the murder. It is determined that the values of his community destroyed the individualistic spirit of his boyhood. Although Sandmose himself did not insist these laws were exclusively Danish, they have come to be associated with Danish and general Nordic values.

Janteloven is generally understood as a metaphor that epitomizes the negative values of group mentality. It has been interpreted as a set of laws that discourages “individuality, individual achievement, novelty of thought and action, spontaneity, variety and competition….encourages sameness, insidious deceitfulness, jealousy, mediocrity, and complacency”.

Janteloven has 10 commandments:

• You shall not think that you are special.
• You shall not think that you are of the same standing as us.
• You shall not think that you are smarter than us.
• Don't fancy yourself as being better than us.
• You shall not think that you know more than us.
• You shall not think that you are more important than us.
• You shall not think that you are good at anything.
• You shall not laugh at us.
• You shall not think that anyone cares about you.
• You shall not think that you can teach us anything.

In a very real way, this is a soul-killing life philosophy that deadens the spirit, wipes the smile off your face and is deeply immersed in low-level negative emotions such as depression, worry and fear. It promotes jealousy and resentment about other people, their achievements and their positive attitude.

Ultimately, this Janteloven attitude results in being left behind in relationships, careers and society in general. It leads to failure. It is not a viable solution in the modern world for creating fruitful personal relationships, families or careers.

When you embrace a Janteloven attitude you embrace a lie.

The truth is this: You can do anything, have anything, be anything you put your mind to set about achieving. The fuel you need to make it work is EMOTION. Not only that, it needs to be a high level emotion – gratitude, happiness, joy, hope, love. Depression, worry, fear and anxiety will not bring you a positive achievement. You will get what you don’t want – because you focused mentally on it and put the emotions of fear, worry, anxiety and depression behind it.

When you do not achieve a goal, take a look at the structure of your life and what you are holding in your mind and the emotions behind it. Typically you find you have been mired in worry, depression, and fear. The result is not achieving a goal. It is then time to kick yourself into high gear and get back on track with what is true – and that is the Law of Attraction. Remind yourself that your will attract whatever you focus on and invest with emotion, whatever that may be. I have embraced the lie that says you cannot have, do or be what you desire. As soon as this is realized it is time to release it and get back on track.

So the process is straight-forward. Be clear about what you want. Focus on it with not only your mind, but your emotions. Direct your emotions. As musician Joan Armatrading says, “light up”. Be grateful. Be joyful. Be excited. Be motivated. Be insistent. See yourself achieving your goal/having what you want and get happy about it. That vision is important. Focus is powerful. Stay focused on that outcome – because where you place your focus is where you will find yourself in the end. Seize every opportunity and be willing to take risks to create opportunity – all with your goal clearly in mind. Expect to receive what your desire.

The Universe listens to what goes through your head and is powered by your emotions. Your emotions make your thought “scream” out what you want and in response the Universe. Without judgment, gives you what you are so strongly focusing on with your thoughts and emotions. That means your best move, if you want to achieve your vision, is to plug into positive, high-level emotions and put them behind your vision.

You will manifest what you desire.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Barrett is a coach and cultural trainer/consultant with a background in journalism, theology and counseling. Her focus is on Law of Attraction coaching, and working with individuals and inter-cultural organizations as a coach, coordinator and trainer. You can reach her by email at lbpdkcoaching@gmail.com or www.lbarrettpowell.com

Emotional Freedom

2009-02-03T02:57:00.000-08:00

How would you like to be emotionally free? Would you like life-changing, amazing results?

You can actually release yourself by using EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques). You will find it is a powerful means of producing success, good well-being and happiness. It activates your body's energy field and releases blocked emotions in your energy field by tapping meridian points with your fingers.

Check out this video and learn how to do EFT for yourself!

You Are the Light!

2009-01-22T04:34:00.000-08:00

Here is a little someting to help remind you that you have much to offer in this world!! Be sure to bookmark this post!

You are the Light