Boomer Woman Blog

The Sister Cruise: With Perspective

2009-12-21T00:22:00.002-06:00

The Sister Cruise (nothing institutionalized, just 4 boomer women taking a cruise together) was a test in patience last week. Fog delayed our departure by 24 hours but before the Coast Guard and Carnival decided on that delay, we sat in the Mobile (Alabama) Civic Center for 7 hours. We finally bailed to Holiday Inn without waiting for the cruise line-arranged hotel discount. That was good because we paid $88/room and at least some who waited for the arranged room paid $130 (same hotel).

Our shortened cruise to Cozumel was cloudy. Not a problem for us: we preferred the beach without sun. And with a partial refund promised, The Sisters were satisfied that the salvaged cruise would suffice.

Ah, we spoke too soon. Our Fun Day at Sea back to Mobile saw 12' to 15' waves and 50 mph winds. Part of the crew became ill. Lots of passengers were ill. Two Navy sailors near us felt ill, too.

One Sister was particularly aware of the clock and reported that the waves quieted at 3am, about 4 hours before our scheduled docking.

Of course, we didn't dock on schedule. The Coast Guard had closed the channel again—due to bouys blown out of position. More patience as we waited for the all clear.

You might think that we would wish for a different week for the cruise, like this week with its beautiful weather at sea and at the ports. The question is put in perspective with one fact about the cruise following ours: 900 children on board. That makes our experience on The Sister Cruise a tad more tolerable.

© 2009 Mary Bold, PhD, CFLE. The content of this blog or related web sites created by Mary Bold (www.marybold.com, www.boldproductions.com, College Intern Blog) is not under any circumstances to be regarded as professional, legal, financial, or medical advice. Or education advice. Or marital advice. Or even a tip.

YO-YO: You're on your own

2009-12-18T00:01:00.003-06:00

YO-YO (you're on your own) joins another favorite, YMMV (your mileage may vary), as watchwords for the holidays. These advisories may be uttered best in more gentle language but I think of them as initials before crafting the more congenial translations of "You can make your own choice for lunch and then we'll plan a joint meal for dinner" and "If you'd rather not go to the movie/mall/museum with us, maybe you can think of something you'd enjoy more."

Family holidays!

Carry a big stick

2009-12-14T00:01:00.002-06:00

Sometimes Sherman finds whole branches on the ground. There is tremendous noise as he drags them through his flap door. And we feel compelled to let him keep them in the house for an hour or so because, after all, we have favorite leisure pursuits, also.

DIY Dog Wash: $6 Soapings

2009-12-11T01:05:00.001-06:00

You know the DIY car washes where you are wise to bring your own quarters rather than rely on the change machines? Well, think smaller. We now have dog washes. For a mere $6 you can soap up a canine and try to rinse him off. If you think that $6 is a lot to pay for a bath, then you haven't ever paid a dog groomer for the service. Truth told, Tom Bold and I did not soap up the dog. We actually came to see the "dog park" that a trainer told Tom about. The park is not really a park. It is a commercial establishment (the dog wash) in Colleyville, Texas, with two play yards. One for big dogs and one for small dogs. The big-dog yard has a nice set of structures for an agility course. I'm impressed with the wisdom of the entrepreneur because we will eventually make it back for a $6 DIY soaping. It's that platform that is attractive. And the ramp up to it. And access being possible by two or more humans.

New SF Favorite: Hotel Milano

2009-12-07T00:01:00.002-06:00

I landed in San Francisco last month for a conference and ended with a hotel night on my own tab. It's usually a good idea to leave the conference hotel when the expense account ends. A happy discovery was Hotel Milano, just off Market and literally at the end of the block of the Westfield Mall.

Rooms are neat, clean, and big enough when you're upgraded. (I am not sure of the size of the intended smaller unit.) Internet access was fine and the view of neighboring buildings no worse than any other San Francisco hotel. For convenience to the Westfield, movies, and the Apple store, the Milano cannot be beat—because its room rent is low. I paid under $100.

I made a similar shift in lodging for a subsequent conference in Atlanta. I stayed in the conference hotel for one night (because I was scheduled to receive one night's lodging on expense account) and then moved to a less costly motel on my own dollars. That would be a drop from $190 per night to $50 per night. You've already guessed it: Motel 6 with AAA discount.

Personal Technology: Beach Advisory

2009-12-04T00:01:00.000-06:00

Even when the Wave (Google's new email-conversation software) isn't operating, I learn from it. Chillax. The contraction for chill out and relax. With this sort of advisory from my email provider, I am reminded that life is all about chillaxing.

Animals in Movie Titles

2009-11-30T00:01:00.004-06:00

On my way to the movies last week, I uttered to myself, "If I could sit through Wild Hogs, I can sit through Old Dogs." And that's the moment I made the connection between the titles. You can fairly ask why I would go to a movie if that were my sentiment. Well, I had read the abysmal reviews of Old Dogs but also the cast list. I really did want to see what script would put Ann-Margret, Justin Long, Bernie Mac, Matt Dillon, Rita Wilson, and Amy Sedaris together. (As it turned out, these actors appeared very briefly in scenes that were more skit than story).

That's my cinematic defense. There's also the matter of language: I don't relate to the words wild and hogs. But I'm pretty comfortable with old and dogs.

(Next movie? I'm determined to move to the fox.)

Personal Technology: Target Technology

2009-11-27T00:01:00.004-06:00

Target gets the award for best web marketing this season. An email message linked me to the Target web site advertising Black Friday sales plus the sweepstakes entry. I bit.

I had to work a lot. The site advised me that I would need the printed target symbol from the newspaper ad—or I could print one out right there on the web. (That's what I did.)

I followed every instruction, even folding my print-out on the guide lines so that the image was on a smaller field. More crucial to the exercise was the instruction to "allow" the site to access by web cam. My check mark also represented permission for possible videotaping on their side.

Next instruction was to hold my print-out target 18" from the camera and tilt it. Oh, my. The spinning wheel of gifts on the screen started rotating. Next instruction: to select the gift I want, put it in the center spot and hold the paper target close to the camera. Oh, my, oh, my. I was told my gift would be unwrapped. And it was. That step took about 20 seconds. The result: a free soft drink at Target's in-store cafe on specific dates. (I won't make it to Target on those dates.)

So, all that explains how my image appeared on the Target web site (see screen capture above). At least, on my view of the Target web site. Target generated an amazing amount of interaction between me and the web site. I can hardly wait for Christmas.

Mainly for Humans: Three Dog Bakery

2009-11-23T00:01:00.004-06:00

Happily, Sherman was welcomed in this bakery. It's Three Dog Bakery. We visited the Indianapolis store in October. What's kept behind glass (bakery shelf style) are the delicacies. See below photo for Drooly Dream Bars. No chocolate, so sugar. Just carefully crafted dog food to sell to humans. Although, admittedly, some of the displays spoke to Sherman. Buckets and buckets of bagels make an impression.

Birthday Cake but Mainly Post Offices

2009-11-20T00:01:00.002-06:00

I went to a birthday lunch yesterday and had wonderful cake at the Cheesecake Factory. This one really did have cheesecake, plus red velvet cake, plus sour cream frosting, plus white chocolate shavings. We intended to photograph it at start but instead dove in. Above photo is saved only by the artistic shadow of the fork.

My companion nodded with recognition when I told her about my USPS visit just before lunch. It marked the first time a postal worker has pointed out to me the most expensive route to send a thick envelope instead of the least expensive. He started pitching the $15.44 express method, then the $4-something priority. I pointed out that my side of the monitor showed regular 1st class (at $1-something) as the same 2 business days delivery time as the priority price. He agreed that it did. And finally sold me that stamp.

My lunch companion said something similar happened to her the previous day at her Post Office. The worker asked her if she would like to rent a box. And that's the first time in her life that's been offered across a postal counter.

We wonder if everyone is raising money....

Personal Happiness: Got a Measure?

2009-11-16T00:01:00.003-06:00

On a scale of 1 to 4.... or do you know the phrase, I love what I do and I do what I love? Because I am often the last o hear catchy phrases, it was new to me when I heard it in an auditorium in early 2009. At the start of a conference at Claremont Graduate University (the headliner was Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi), a sound technician tested the mikes with that I love phrase. And he sounded genuine. And I was especially impressed because it was before 8:00 in the morning.

Happiness gets a lot of attention in our culture. Some of that attention is on baby boomers, who are said to expect happiness. And because we all assume that the doing generating happiness must be in paid employment, we look to research into job satisfaction. I like this report from a U of Chicago researcher in 2007 on job and general happiness. If you want the fast version (lists), go straight to pages 6 and 7.

Looking at anything from 2007 means looking at stats collected before the Great Recession. So, the next good research will be on happiness in spite of un- and low-employment. And the question of how much happiness today's young adults expect in life and career and will be far more interesting that what boomers expect.

Posted from 30,000 feet. Yep, WIFI on the plane. This bit of fancy cost $7.95.

2009-11-15T03:35:00.000-06:00

Could not resist.

WYSIWYG not editable.

. Posting with HTML. Clunky. Slow. Still fun.

Personal Technology: I'm Waving

2009-11-13T00:01:00.004-06:00

Do you remember the anticipation of gmail? Waiting for an invitation? It took months for me. Once initiated to the email system, I have never gone back to Outlook. Well, except for when clients require it, which, as it happens, two do.

I admire universities that have settled on commercial vendors like Google and Yahoo for their email systems. And admire even more those universities that simply say, use any email system (and address) you care to. The key to such a liberal policy is to not try to administer any of it, of course.

Contrasting gmail to everything else, the obvious winner is gmail. Ah, until wave turned up. And it is turning up. I imagine we'll know in a few months whether it's the next obvious winner.

Wave is all about conversation and my early experimentation with it suggests that it's also about speed. Streamlined access to communicating means that email and IM merge (to a ping, even) and then extras are thrown in, too. Like Google Gears. I don't have that loaded yet. But I think it's the drag and drop functionality that just worked its way into gmail this year, too.

OK. So, back to anticipation. Wave is coming by invitation just as gmail did. Good reasons for that, likely. Good way to beta or preview while error reports can be tracked and responded to. Good way to take advantage of early adopters who will tend to do anything for novelty. Good way to market a new product. You know, maximizing that anticipation factor.

So, how did I get wave? Well, it wasn't Google deciding to include boomers although surely there are a few accidentally in the first wave of wave. More likely, the first wave is composed of people just as young as those showing up on my contact list. You see, when I log into wave, it produces a list of wave-enabled users who are also on my gmail list of 2,093 contacts. (Yes, that was a wake-up call.)

I was invited to wave by one of the 5 people that appear on my wave contact list. I'm pretty sure the oldest person there is about 30. No, maybe 35. But the other 4 are 30 or younger. One is a professional staffer at Sloan-C (consortium on distance learning). Two are PhD-holders who are technical managers at Texas universities. One is a PhD student at Stanford. And one is a PhD alum from Princeton who now works in a non-profit. (And I am merely the old person that one of them fondly thought to share a wave with.)

Here's how compelling a wave can be... my laptop is on its last leg, which is to say that Tom Bold inherits it very soon. So, I'm tending it cautiously to keep functioning while I wait for holiday sales. You know what that means: lots of back-ups and no new software. Until wave popped up it's advisory that I need a newer or different browser in order to use the conversation system. (See how I'm already learning the new lingo.) I did not hesitate. I downloaded chrome on the spot.

I hope you are similarly compelled to catch the next wave. I plan to invite all my friends. Of course, it will take a while to work through my gmail contact list....

Boomers Among the Health Insurance Statistics

2009-11-09T00:01:00.002-06:00

As analysts predict the percentage of Americans who will access a public option for health insurance, I continue to wonder if the analysts know the baby boomer mindset about employment in the years approaching retirement. Most women my age (that I know) readily acknowledge that they are working only "for the bennies." If they were able to access health insurance independently (and affordably), they would walk off the job and look for contract work, instead. More of my colleagues than you might guess are in their employers' health plans because of their own pre-existing conditions or their spouses'. Thus, the threat of leaving employment has to do with both cost and acceptance of those pre-existing conditions. Add one more feature: a lot of us are female primary wage earners, our boomer husbands already having been laid off or "retired" early due to the economic downturn.

The economic downturn is a psychological factor, as well, and one could argue that boomers will cling to employment as long as possible. But even on that score, I question the conventional wisdom. The boomers I know say they will cheerfully work part-time or as self-employed independent contractors under this assumption: they are going to have to work forever, anyway, so they want to do it as flexibly as possible in the early years when they still feel like traveling.

These scenarios are not mentioned in the analyses of the health care legislation emerging from Congress. Indeed, there's no good statistical reason that my thinking about "everyone I know" should be reflected in the national dialogue. After all, we are years away from the real impact of whatever legislation is decided. Whatever public option emerges won't do it until 2013 or thereabouts. And so what's the immediate impact? A whole lot of boomers (like me) factoring in the number of years we need to pay for expensive coverage before we can benefit from a more affordable version. So, as house mortgages are paid off, the dollars will shift to health insurance premiums and the new owners of those premiums will...have to work forever, anyway.

Personal Technology: Internet on the Road... and In Flight

2009-11-06T00:01:00.002-06:00

With the help of an air card (AKA data card), I kept on computing last week while crossing the country on an Interstate highway. (I wasn't driving.) That is, I kept online, not just computing. Any place I could get cell phone service, I could get the Internet on my laptop because I had the air card in a USB slot. Think of it this way: the air card is my computer's cell phone for one function, to access the Internet.

Now, as nifty as I consider this capability, I have to admit there's something fancier: Internet in flight. A colleague emailed me as she crossed the country via plane. Her access cost $7. Necessary? Nope. Nifty? Absolutely.

Toy Story 2 Quiz Easier Than the GRE

2009-11-02T00:01:00.004-06:00

I spent more than a week waffling on committing nearly 3 hours to the Toy Story double feature. I'm not so much a fan of animation even though the 3D Up caught my fancy earlier this year and Wild Things captured my cinema dollars most recently. I also had no fond memories of the Toy Story movies. I didn't know why. I certainly knew of the films. Why wouldn't I have seen them in first release? Ah... look at the year: 1995. I was taking the GRE. So, I went to the local Harkins for the double feature. And found a test in 2009! The intermission tested our knowledge about the characters. When the quiz at the 3-minute mark asked, "What was the name of Jessie's previous owner?" I didn't have a clue. I didn't even know who Jessie was. Happily, the sequel started just 3 minutes later and I learned all about Jessie and Emily. And I delighted that my quiz this year was so much easier than the GRE.

Who buys "live" gourmet lettuce?

2009-10-30T00:20:00.002-05:00

I cannot imagine that there's a market for gourmet lettuce that arrives in the grocery in the same shape it left the earth. Who would spend $8 on a head of lettuce even if it came with its own dirt? Oh, my gosh. I did. But I'm also the person who buys wine bottles for the sake of their label designs (and then leaves the bottle in the sunny kitchen window in order to see the label every day, which is bad for the wine, I am told).

So, what's the real benefit of this vegetable purchase? Puts in perspective the price I pay for bagged and washed butter lettuce. I used to think a bag at $3.50 was expensive. Now, I think it's downright cheap.

Take Good Care: Part 2

2009-10-26T00:01:00.002-05:00

A colleague shared this story after a vacation trip with her elderly mother:

"We needed the help of two security guards to locate Mother. She was missing about 15 minutes. She was an emotional wreck by then and so were we. One of the guards tapped me on the arm and said, Let me give you a tip. Put her photograph on your phone.

"So, for the rest of the trip, I took her picture every morning so it would show the clothes she had on that day."

Take Good Care: Part 1

2009-10-23T00:01:00.004-05:00

If you have ever tried to help a friend or family through a rough time, with meals and errands, for example, you know the logistical problems. Online calendars ease the difficulty and the ones designed for care-taking are especially easy. I received a link to CareCalendar through email—clicked on it—and immediately saw the "needs" in red for a family with a new baby. The password-protected site provides as much information as the family chooses to share (photos, directions to house, etc.) and maps out a plan that everyone can check 24/7.

More Dodge. And Biggner.

2009-10-19T00:01:00.002-05:00

Just a few days ago, I said that the Dodge insignia was popping up all around me. And later that day, it popped up again. This time in large fashion on the back window of a Dodge Charger. It seems there are literally thousands of images you can choose from to display your ram dedication. Layouts for your Facebook page, too. I had no idea.

A Dodge Look

2009-10-16T00:01:00.002-05:00

It's not the angle of the shot. Certain cars really do have this charging look about them. I react with a nostalgia even though I can't quite place the source. In any case, these cars with the Dodge insignia are turning up all around me. This is because we recently bought one. Not this style. But a Dodge Grand Caravan. (I blogged about that: people who buy minivans for their dogs. And then we became those people. You can fill in the blanks.) I propose that people didn't start buying Dodge cars in huge droves (in fact, we know there have been no droves). I just became aware of the insignia.

Comparing Health Care Policy Proposals

2009-10-12T00:01:00.002-05:00

Yes, there's the NYTimes blog about health care policy and legislation. But there's another tool that I recommend: Kaiser Family Foundation's Side by Side Comparison of Major Health Care Reform Proposals. In a big blue box, you can select 2 to 12 "sources" such as Senate Finance Committee and House Tri-Committee and then advance to the next blue box to select your topics (e.g., individual mandate, expansion of public programs). When your checkboxes are marked, a button appears above the top blue box: Generate Comparisons. Click it for a clear and easy-to-read chart. When the chart is visible, notice new buttons: Print This Comparison and Create a Different Comparison.

KFF hasn't held shares in the various Kaiser health companies since the 1980s. KFF is regarded as a leading research and policy foundation involved in health issues globally.

Name Your Flu

2009-10-09T00:01:00.002-05:00

A colleague referred to Hy-Nee Flu and it took me a while (and required confirmation) that she was referring to H1N1. So, we now have three names for the stuff if we count "swine flu," too. We have also added the term seasonal flu to refer to non-H1N1. Used to be, it was just the flu.

Among my friends and colleagues, I actually have a number of folks who need to care. Two are pregnant. Three have compromised immune systems. And a couple are over 65. I'm friends with a preschooler, too. She's not worried but her parents are aware. And many friends work on college campuses where H1N1 is routinely discussed in terms prevention as well as response.

Baby boomers are luckiest, with presumed immunity or least resistance. That's if you were born before 1957, at least. So, there's also the matter of historic flu. Boomers are also probably the most opinionated about what to do about the flu. To move away from opinion, I recommend flu.gov, which comes in 4 flavors: English, Spanish, Chinese, Vietnamese. The web site describes the most vulnerable populations. And provides perspective with maps and facts.

Stay healthy,
Lida

Sonic Cruiser: Me

2009-10-05T00:01:00.004-05:00

I used to have graduate students in my life. And they frequently gave me Sonic gift cards. Holidays, I would receive at least a couple of $5 cards. Now, I occasionally receive a Sonic card from a former student and, egads, her daughter. (How did I get to be this age?) But most of the time I'm using my own cash at Sonic. And since many of the drive-ins accept only a Sonic card for auto pay, I have no opportunity to use a credit card. Ah, well, then, I need to buy my own Sonic card and "load it" online using my credit card. You know where that's going: miles.

So, onto the Sonic web site. I learn that it takes many steps to load a card and become a Cruiser. I see a mention of maintaining a balance. That's not necessarily a good place to park my money. On the other hand, it takes many steps to load a card. I go right back into the site and take those many steps again in order to set up a year's plan for auto-loading the card whenever it drops to $30. (It will zoom to $100 within 24 hours with a charge to my credit card. You know: miles.)

As tiresome as this tale is (for me, too, by the way), I am compelled to relate why $30 is my threshold for re-loading. Just last week, I picked up lunch for colleagues on my way to a client's office. The bill at Sonic was $23. So, of course, I want to always have $23 on my Sonic card. (Ironically, that lunch group included two former grad students, both of whom can recite my preferred Sonic drink because, well, they used to bring it to me in another setting.)

When I ended the loading process online and the graphic above appeared on screen, it came with the designation PREFERRED. I can only assume that the demographic for Sonic card loading is an age that recognizes that term. And is amused.

Personal Technology: Zap2it for TV listings

2009-10-02T00:01:00.003-05:00

I mean, I used to subscribe to TV Guide. Back in the days of the digest size. When I was a child. Or at least 12 or 13. Yes, that's still a child, I'm sure. Finally, in adulthood, I despaired at the timing of the magazine's arrival in the mail. It arrived just in time, not days ahead so that I could preview. (Do all boomers like television this much?)

And then the price started going up. I persisted in buying TV Guide at the grocery store because I relied on it for keeping up with popular culture. It's where I learned about Y necklaces in time to sound alert when my teenaged daughter wanted one. I kept up with a slice of Hollywood gossip without having to ever buy People. That's right. I have never purchased People. Same with the tabloids. These are small stands against promoting paparazzi.

Eventually, the price for TV Guide ended my devotion to the publication. My purchases became fewer and fewer and I began to rely on the online version for TV listings. I smiled broadly when I saw the magazine increase its physical size to a standard format (and I started buying occasionally, no doubt influenced by the cover, proving that to capture boomers' attention you have to make the pictures big). Aha! Enlarged print to satisfy an aging population! Boomers being served! Because I cannot imagine that the demographic includes that younger set of folks who have an entirely different perspective on television, let along television listings.

Where does this get us? Heavy reliance on the online web site, tvguide.com. And so when it reconfigured this Fall to (presumably) create a flashier display, I lost patience. I will not wait for the web site to be perfected. Clicking on a listing used to create a pop-up description. Today, the click expands the grid to (presumably) display a description that can be toggled for display and hide. Well, it doesn't work.

Guess what does? Zap2it. com—with smooth functionality and better customization than tvguide.com's offering.

Now, if you try it out, you might want to go ahead and register before you start customizing. And when you fill in the questionnaire, you might want to leave blank the space for nickname. Rule-follower that I am, I filled in a nickname. "Already taken." So, I filled in another. "Already taken." It took multiple efforts to get to a viable nickname. That's when I realized that the purpose is to have a "handle" for posting comments; it actually wasn't a required field.

So, not that I ever post to any commercial web site, or even to listservs, you'll know it's me if you see sweetpotato on your Zap2it screen.