Geek Girl Blonde

There's an upside to a Fred Phelps stalking

2008-07-14T01:58:00.004-05:00

Fred Phelps and the Westboro Baptist "Church" knuckleheads are at it again.

They picketed Tim Russert's funeral, and now they plan a repeat performance at the late great Tony Snow's funeral.

I'm beginning to think that instead of reviling these people, we ought to thank them. If you get picketed by Fred and Co., besides the unfortunate fact that you are dead, you probably did something right in life to piss him off. You were probably a fallen military hero or -- like Snow -- an honorable public figure. Heck, even Jeffrey Dahmer looks like a dignified saint next to Fred Phelps.

Seriously, as hard as it might be, I think Jill Snow ought to walk right up to Freddie, shake his hand and thank him for all the positive publicity for her dearly departed husband.

I'm only half joking.

Do you think there's a way to piss off Fred Phelps while you're still alive? I mean, wouldn't it be great to get a personal damning-to-hell from Freddo himself? I could sell T-shirts: "Fred Phelps' Proud Whore of Babylon Since 2008."

I mean, I don't think this guy is ever going to relent unless someone turns him into mashed potatoes. (Which I'm surprised hasn't happened yet.) Might as well make a profit and have some fun why he's still making an ass of himself.

Cursing the inevitable -- Tony Snow is gone

2008-07-12T10:03:00.004-05:00

I always liked Tony.

He seemed like such a real guy. Solid.

I will never forget the Sunday morning after 9/11. I sat on the edge of my bed, getting ready for church. Tony was on the air, delivering some heart-wrenching commentary that sent me over the edge. I started crying, wondering how he was holding it together himself.

Then he lost it. And I thought, Yep, he's a real person, too.

His affable on-air persona aside, you missed the best of Tony if you didn't read his print columns. In those lines, a very robust, passionate, funny, flawed man emerged. On his aging body:

There was a time, not long ago, when ... I liked shedding tops to display what little physique I possessed. But that was then. I am older. I've found profitable employment. I don't have vast stretches of leisure time. So gravity has taken hold. My sketchy little abs are gone -- along with the gumdrop biceps and squared-off deltoids -- and in their place, a substance eerily reminiscent of bread dough.

On the Clinton impeachment hearings. (This one made me blush.):

One hears not the crisp chiming of outrage, but the languid sigh of waves lapping ashore. The senators linger over the censorious syllables as if hovering over damsels of their dreams.

One senses the palpable thunder of thrumming hearts; the roar of violet, violent passions. While the young pols redden and wag their fingers, the old guys fumble through fobbed pockets for vials of nitroglycerin.

It seems that these honorables, with their demands for fresh revelation, secretly hope for talk of riding crops and nannies' bibs. Yet, whatever Monica's testimony brings, it won't teach us anything new about sex...

Even senators know this. Each has experienced the bursting joys and quiet aftermath of carnal congress.

Bursting joys and quiet aftermath. Tony!!

He was a true dude in every good way. The barest of coverage he's getting on Fox this morning (unlike the wall-to-wall coverage of Tim Russert's sudden passing) seems like a bit of a diss. So, I gladly spill some virtual ink for Tony this morning along with more than a few tears.

God rest your soul, Tony, and God bless your family.

UPDATE: Okay, it's the top of the hour and Fox is devoting a lot of time to Tony. Thank you.

BTW, don't miss clips of Tony jamming with his own ROCK BAND at Michelle Malkin's blog today. Played electric guitar, saxophone and flute!

Sigh. Heartbreaking.

Living in two worlds

2008-06-28T10:45:00.002-05:00

Greetings, comrades.

I've been away from blogging lately. I've been torn about how to live here, on GGB Central, as a flaming conservative ranting at Obama and the likes, and in my other world, where I am a dancer and artist and nearly always in the minority religion-wise and politics-wise, where rants don't go over so well. I usually don't talk about being the GGB in dance circles, and although plenty of people who know me as a conservative are well aware that I am hardly the buttoned-down, penny loafer type, sometimes -- you know -- they just don't get it. And because I am an old-fashioned, old-school reformed Christian outside the bailywig of Rick Warren and Joel Osteen, I am out of the mainstream for a lot of conservatives as well.

But I've been on Facebook for awhile, where my disparate identities converge. I guess I'm getting a little tired of my schizophrenic online existence, and maybe my artist friends might give me the time of day politically and religiously if I keep the ranting to a minimum and approach things thoughtfully ... as I hope I would face-to-face.

Should I do it here, or should I develop a new blog? I'm not sure, but stay tuned for a new tone.

LCMS? We don't need no stinkin' LCMS!!!

2008-05-28T19:23:00.002-05:00

Todd Wilken returns.

Take that, David Strand. Pppppllllppppttttt!!!!!!

Maxine Waters ...

2008-05-22T18:11:00.002-05:00

... threatened to "socialize" (she meant "nationalize") the oil companies in Congressional hearings today.

Solid 25-percenter, that Maxine is. Solid. Could we earmark some funds to send her a copy of Economics for Dummies? Anyone?

Stick it to the man! Vote for Obama!

2008-05-20T21:34:00.004-05:00

Just watched Obama's speech. I am so damn excited that he wants to reward work and not wealth. Because God knows, one has nothing to do with the other. I swear, all that lush, filthy wealth just materalizing out of nowhere -- no fair that CEOs own all the magic fairy wealth-creating dust and all us cretins have to work, work, work, work, work, work, work ...

Out of the mouths of babes ...

2008-04-11T11:34:00.003-05:00

Ya know, I never cared for the sung version of "The Lord's Prayer." (The song, not the prayer itself.) The melody is atrocious. Most people don't have the vocal range for it and murder the high notes. And at weddings, ministers always segue right into it from a spoken prayer, and I never know whether I can raise my head and watch the soloist, or if I'm supposed to still be looking at my shoes.

However, this tyke might make me a convert:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AR4PQ30VkBk

She actually does a better job than most wedding singers I've heard, and I love her using Elmo as a prop.

The high notes, however, did startle my cat.

'Pregnant dude': hoax? UPDATE: Maybe not

2008-04-04T13:46:00.004-05:00

I wouldn't be blogging about the so-called "pregnant man," Thomas Beatie of Oregon, but methinks there is something wrong with "his" story. Here are two excerpts from an article on Yahoo! TV:

Beatie's wife Nancy said she inseminated him with a syringe using sperm purchased from a bank.

Okay, fine. This "man" apparently retained his female reproductive organs, and this is what you'd call the poor man's version of artificial insemination, BUT ...

The couple said an earlier attempt at pregnancy failed when he developed a tubal pregnancy, resulting in surgery that removed his Fallopian tubes.

If Thomas has no Fallopian tubes, how did an egg get from ovary to the uterus to wait for the syringe-introduced sperm? And why would an ectopic pregnancy call for removal of both tubes anyway? (Unless you had a twin ectopic pregnancy and both tubes were involved, which I imagine is rarer than being struck by lightning.)

Furthermore, I'm not a doctor but I have a family member who has gone through the throes of infertility treatments. All kinds of things can screw with your hormone levels, which must be just so to make conception possible. If he had been dosing himself with testosterone to the point that he has facial hair (even if he supposedly quit two years ago), I'm skeptical about this person's ability to conceive.

I guess we'll all find out in about three months.

UPDATE: Another article I found indicated he lost only one Fallopian tube, and Thomas insists that his body recovered back to its normal hormonal balance after ceasing testosterone. Like I said, we'll see.

If this is for real, I shudder.

Putting the "best construction" on the Issues, Etc. cancellation

2008-03-30T10:54:00.004-05:00

In all my reading about the sudden, inexplicable and (IMHO) unjustifiable cancellation of Issues, Etc., good Christian people of all stripes have been taking pains to put the "best construction" on the LCMS' actions. "Don't forget the Eighth Commandment!" they cry.

Yes, but ...

Let's say your husband comes home at 3 a.m. one night reeking of alcohol, stale smoke and pheromones. His clothes are rumpled. He has lipstick smears on his shirt and it's not your shade.

Now, how would you put the "best construction" on that scenario? He was abducted and held hostage in a nightclub by lipstick-wielding aliens?

The more the LCMS tries to spin the story, the worse they look. Their "explanations" have logic holes big enough to apply for statehood. (See Dr. Erich Heidenreich's excellent follow-up questions to the latest "statement" here.)

The LCMS went nuclear on Issues, Etc., and the only logical construction is that it was a complete and total repudiation of the show, its content and its host and producer.

The restoration of the archives and the LCMS' "explanations" have come only after holy fits from thousands of listeners.

I truly believe we have our answer, folks. From where I sit, the LCMS has no intention to bring back Issues, Etc., at least not with the robust content it produced under the leadership of Pastor Todd Wilken and the intrepid Jeff Schwarz. To me, the only point in continuing to scream at the LCMS is to get someone ... anyone ... to cop to the decision and admit that this was a political hit. Barring that, we might as well go scream at the moon.

However, I believe that Todd and Jeff will rise again. As Captain Malcolm Reynolds might say, Issues, Etc. was just too pretty to die.

Issues, Etc. update

2008-03-30T10:30:00.004-05:00

Sorry for the dearth of posts this week! I decided to sit back and see what unfolded with the whole Issues, Etc. fiasco, and I've decided to -- for the time being -- remove the "Bring Back Issues, Etc." banner from the right panel. Not because I don't want them back, but I don't think anyone believes that the synod has any intention of bringing back the show, and maybe that's a good thing.

Items of note:

IE fiasco gets attention in the Wall Street Journal: Read the article here by M.Z. Hemingway, a past guest on IE and someone in the know.

David Strand, exec dir for the LCMS Board of Communication Services, issued a more detailed and lengthy statement. (Read here.) He says it was purely a financial decision. The short version of the IE fans' response (including mine): no one's buying it.

The online petition to bring back IE has topped 5,600 signatures as of this posting!!!

A special blog devoted exclusively to IE has been created: Bring Back Issues, Etc.

The Issues, Etc. controversy spreads!!

2008-03-22T11:44:00.006-05:00

A very special look into LCMS' computer systems

2008-03-22T11:35:00.004-05:00

A glimpse into the aftermath of the Issues, Etc. fiasco. (Click on the image above to view it at full size.)

Stink meter goes off the charts on the Issues, Etc. fiasco

2008-03-20T23:30:00.007-05:00

Amazing tidbit on Pastor Randy Asburry's blog:

A standard severance package has been offered to both [Pastor Todd] Wilken and [Jeff] Schwarz, but it comes with the string of a “gag order” attached. (That is, they are being asked to sign a document stating that they will not discuss the conditions of their termination of employment.) The Issues, Etc. team is seeking legal counsel before they accept the conditional severance package.

As we say in the South: DO WHAT?

Apparently, there is much that Todd and Jeff could say that would embarrass the LCMS, which is absolutely no surprise to me or to anyone else closely following this story. It further reinforces the prevailing theory that nuking IE was entirely a political decision.

The smell is getting worse, LCMS. Another round of shinola is not going to help.

Maundy Thursday musings

2008-03-20T17:15:00.003-05:00

"Maundy Thursday" -- what is it?

"Maundy" is a corruption of the Latin word mandatum, or "mandate," and refers to Jesus saying, "A new commandment I give unto you, That ye love one another; as I have loved you." (John 13:34)

In the middle of the Issues, Etc. fiasco and impassioned calls to respect the Eighth Commandment (do not bear false witness against your neighbor), I'm reminded how ridiculously hard it is -- no, impossible -- to love my enemies. I'm also reminded that loss of a job -- though traumatic -- is pretty mild compared with what our brothers and sisters elsewhere in the world suffer daily in the name of Christ. (For a few sobering stories, visit here or here.)

The holy law that Jesus iterated on the day before his Passion strikes us all in the face. We fail miserably at it. And that brings us to Holy Friday, the day of the Cross, the day that all the sins of the world were nailed to the tree along with the Lamb of God, along with death and the grave.

On this Holy Thursday, may you rely fully on the Lamb of God, who takes away the sins of the world, to fill your heart with love and give you forgiveness of all your sins.

Issues, Etc. unceremoniously canned; UPDATE: LCMS issues "non-statement"; UPDATE: Wil Weedon organizing protest

2008-03-19T14:38:00.008-05:00

[Scroll down for updates. And yes, please use my banners.]

Got the astounding news today that the radio program Issues, Etc. -- a favorite of Rich and mine -- has been suddenly canceled and its host and producer, the Rev. Todd Wilken and Jeff Schwarz, respectively, unceremoniously fired with no explanation.

And this is Holy Week.

Reliable sources say that the cause is neither finances nor scandal -- neither of which would have necessitated the sudden cancellation of the program anyway. Speculation abounds, but the fact that there was no warning coupled with the fact that even the show's Web site was taken down completely smacks of a punishing stance by the Lutheran Church Missouri-Synod, which underwrote the program.

Here's a roundup of blog posts about the topic:

Wil Weedon: http://weedon.blogspot.com/2008/03/holy-tuesday-treachery.html

Randy Asburry: http://rasburrysres.blogspot.com/2008/03/day-of-infamy-call-for-prayer.html

James White: http://www.aomin.org/aoblog/index.php?itemid=2585

Kim Riddlebarger: http://kimriddlebarger.squarespace.com/the-latest-post/2008/3/18/lcms-pulls-the-plug-on-issues-etc.html

J.A.T. Vierkant: http://jatvierkantsnotebook.blogspot.com/2008/03/issues-etc-canceled.html

It just galls me that hacks like Joel Osteen and Joyce Meyer are multimillionaires and poor Todd and Jeff are in the ranks of the unemployed today.

UPDATE: Looks like the LCMS has offered up a non-responsive response on the KFUO Web site:

For programmatic and business reasons, the decision was made this week to discontinue the "Issues, Etc." program on KFUO-AM. We look forward to bringing you new programming in this time slot in the near future. Also, we thank "Issues" host Rev. Todd Wilken and producer Mr. Jeff Schwarz for their years of service on behalf of the station. Those interested may still download past "Issues, Etc." programs from the "Issues" archive on this website. Thank you sincerely for your continued support of KFUO's radio ministry.

Try again, LCMS. Not. Good. Enough.

UPDATE: Pastor Wil Weedon, a frequent IE guest and -- I believe -- Jeff Schwarz's own pastor, is wanting to organize a formal public protest in St. Louis. Here's his blog post about it.

I'll be there in spirit, pastor.

William F. Buckley, Jr., RIP

2008-02-27T16:25:00.001-06:00

Rich has a roundup of links.

Haute Charmin

2008-02-25T19:42:00.002-06:00

I just gotta say ...

Obama looks like one of those unlucky souls who has to create a "wedding dress" out of toilet paper at a bachelorette party.

And I'm trying to be funny, not ethnically insensitive, so don't any of you go all PC-ballistic on me.

Great week for space fans

2008-02-22T13:41:00.005-06:00

Wednesday: The Space Shuttle Atlantis makes a safe trip home.

Also Wednesday: A lunar eclipse graces us here in our tiny hamlet as well as across the world.

Thursday: Star Wars!!! The U.S. Navy shows that math and physics can come together to protect the world from dead spy satellites everywhere.

By the way, if you want to take a long, loving look at the Ringed One, now is your time. Space.com says that now is the best time to see Saturn shining in sunlight with its rings at the correct angle to be seen clearly.

NASA's photo, not mine, unfortunately.

In fact, I was stunned when I looked carefully at the photo I took Wednesday night of the eclipse. (Be my guest and save it to your hard drive if you wish.) If you enlarge the photo to where the moon seems about as large as a fingertip on your monitor, you can clearly see that Saturn is no star -- it is spherical and large, and the fuzzy halo circling it almost vertically are the ice rings.

(Not to say that stars aren't spheres, too, but at this distance they tend to look more like dots or points of light. The planets have a more visble disk shape -- one way you can spot them in the sky with the naked eye.)

I couldn't believe I could get even that level of detail from a regular ol' digital camera. I salivate to think what I could do with this. Hubby just had the great idea of viewing Saturn through the digital video camera we have, the signal of which can be output to my portable DVD player for a more comfortable viewing angle. Must try!

Live long and prosper, y'all. :)

Moon shot

2008-02-20T22:18:00.009-06:00

Hubby and I spent a fair while this evening on the back patio enjoying fine tobacco, crisp ale, luscious Jamaican rum, and a rare treat in the skies.

Got some photos of the big event. Not bad for an amateur astrophotographer! (Click directly on the photo below to open the full-size version.)

By the way, the "star" to the lower left is Saturn; the one directly above is Regulus.

Que sorpresa!

2008-02-19T12:35:00.003-06:00

(AP) Fidel Castro resigns as Cuba's president

I figured this guy would hang onto power for at least two weeks past his death. Theory: Others have taken charge and he's too weak to fight back?

OTOH, he hasn't been seen in public since 2006. Muerto?

Smoking to the glory of God

2008-02-18T01:19:00.009-06:00

That last post got me cranky. Then I found this from The Sacred Sandwich.

I checked. It's true. The great Calvinist C. H. Spurgeon was a cigar aficionado. Here's what he said in 1874:

"Well, dear friends, you know that some men can do to the glory of God what to other men would be sin. And notwithstanding what brother Pentecost has said, I intend to smoke a good cigar to the glory of God before I go to bed to-night.

"If anybody can show me in the Bible the command, 'Thou shalt not smoke,' I am ready to keep it; but I haven't found it yet. I find ten commandments, and it's as much as I can do to keep them; and I've no desire to make them into eleven or twelve.

And yes, people still wig over this. And over the fact that Martin Luther drank beer.

God bless 'em, and thank God for the Reformation.

Read today's devotional from Spurgeon's classic work Morning and Evening here.

ADDENDUM: As dear hubby pointed out, it's not like Christendom had a problem with beer and cigars before the Reformation. Still, Spurgeon was a Baptist, and that just is too much for some people to bear.

Annoyance

2008-02-17T23:52:00.008-06:00

Hi, bunkies! The GGB is tucked away in Pigeon Forge, Tennessee, with her sweetie. Hubby and I have had a marvelous time, and a full report is forthcoming later this week.

Rich and I sampled some fine cigars this weekend, and I've been 'Net-searching tonight for recommended cigar-friendly hangouts. Let me just say, I am getting so tired of non-Alabamian reviewers being so friggin' surprised that anything quality exists in Birmingham, like this brilliant beginning of a review of the Blue Monkey Lounge from WineSpectator.com by one Jason Sheftell:

There's an old joke that goes something like, "What's the best thing coming out of Alabama?" The punchline, "Highway 20/59."
While Alabamians enjoy a good laugh, they know their state has heaps more to offer than rednecks and ugly documentary footage. The GulfCoast [sic], the Robert T. Jones Golf Trail, the Alabama-Auburn rivalry, barbecue and Southern hospitality are the least of it--especially for the hedonistic cigar aficionado.

Yeah ... we all think that joke is just HI-larious. By the way, nice of you to admit we aren't ALL mouth-breathers.

If remnants of segregation still linger in certain parts of the South, the Blue Monkey isn't one of them. A diverse crowd lounged around as if they had nowhere to go and nothing to do but sit and be lively, sip their drinks, relax, and revel in a nice smoke and cordial conversation with a passerby or an old friend.

I just love it. He might as well say: "Even though some Southerners still think George Wallace was just a super cool dude, the Blue Monkey is decidedly not one of those places where you'll accidentally walk in on a Klan meeting."

I am so relieved that Wine Spectator has declared one of the 'Ham's most popular bars a Bubba-free Zone (TM), aren't you?

Can't help wondering if this is by the same Jason Sheftell. If so, he seems to have a preoccupation with ethnic stereotypes:

Orthodox Jews race around in black hats carrying heavy books and bags of bialys. Chinese people worship in Buddhist temples next to electronics shops and restaurant supply stores.

Happy heart day!!

2008-02-14T11:50:00.008-06:00

First off, love and smooches to my dear husband, Rich. This is our third Valentine's Day to celebrate together -- I still have the red Mardi Gras-type beads from our first one. :)

Some time ago, Rich and I were discussing the deciding factor in the last few decades' worth of presidential elections, and we decided it was not policy or ideals. Nope, for the majority of the electorate, it's simply who you'd rather have a beer with. Or, more crudely, who you'd pick on a deserted island for the perpetuation of the species.

And this truth does not bode well for either Hillary Clinton or John McCain.

I mean, Obama is as much a raging Marxist as Hillary is and I can't vote for him, but he's the only one of the three I can stand to look at or listen to for any length of time. I'd have a beer with him.

Other people are thinking along these same lines, including the inimitable Mark Steyn. An appetizer for you:

2004 -- Bush v. Kerry -- Bush easily would be the one to send a Valentine to. That stiff, arrogant, gold-digging twit Kerry is not good relationship material. Say what you will about Bush, he is loyal, friendly and approachable. Unfortunately, time would prove there wasn't a real "love connection" between Bush and the Conservative base.

Read the rest here. (Hat tip to IMAO.)

Make your own candy hearts here.

Hillary for president

2008-02-11T02:23:00.001-06:00

Hey ... Ann Coulter said she'd campaign for Hillary if John McCain got the GOP nomination, which he all but has.

Can't be that bad, can it? Let's give it a try:

You want money for WHAT???

2008-02-06T14:39:00.001-06:00

In all fairness, Hillary Clinton is not the only pol who enjoys playing fast and loose with other people's cash.

You know those protests going on in Berkeley, Calif.? You know those federal earmarks for Berkeley that Sen. Jim DeMint wants to get rid of? Wondered what they were for? Here ya go: (emphasis mine)

Over $2 million was secretly tucked away for Berkeley earmarks in the 2008 Omnibus Appropriations bill, projects that were never voted on or debated... Included in the $2 million worth of pork are some particularly wasteful projects. One earmark provides gourmet organic lunches to schools in the Berkeley School District. While our Marines are making due with MREs of Sloppy Joe and Chili with Beans, the organization Chez Panisse is getting federal tax dollars to design meals that promote "environmental harmony." Chez Panisse's menu features Comté cheese soufflé with mâche salad," "Meyer lemon éclairs with huckleberry coulis" and "Chicory salad with creamy anchovy vinaigrette and olive toast."

I'm now re-imagining the fictional conversation from my previous post:

"Give me $2 million."

"What?"

"For my kid's Meyer lemon eclairs and chicory salad."

Hey, Berkeley: Go feed your kids Meyer lemon eclairs and chicory salad on your own friggin' dime.

'Scuse me while I go have some ramen.

(Hat tip: Michelle Malkin)

UPDATE: I just love how the SF Chronicle characterizes the federal earmarks in question: "Washington money bound for Berkeley schools, food programs and ferries." If you didn't know any better, wouldn't you imagine pencils and peanut butter sandwiches? Yeah, I would, too.