Cara's Charismatic World

RSV... HUH ?

2008-08-19T21:46:00.000-07:00

The guest list is a very difficult piece to any wedding. It's a balancing act between two families, friends and family, and the almighty BUDGET.

It is no wonder that after thinking long and hard about WHO to invite that we spent a lot of time (not to mention money) on our invitations. I ordered custom stamps, the boy designed a monogram, I picked out just the right color ribbon to tie the inserts together, I even bought (coordinating !) stamps for the RSVP card !
Now I know most people probably didn't notice some of the details that were put into the invite. I also know that I didn't HAVE to put that effort into it and that I'm the one who cares the most. I also know probably almost every bride has a rant about this... but seriously...

why oh why did I have 80 unconfirmed guests (about 39 actual invites, the 80 includes their guests/children) as of my RSVP deadline ?

I can understand the bridal party (3 of them didn't send theirs in) Since they're already committed to coming and the ones traveling have already told us their plans and such. I'll also give my grandfather a pass as it's harder for him to get to a mail box. I even understand those who arrived by today. ( a day or two to realize the date had passed, and 3-4 days days for it to arrive could make it a week late)

Even after that and filling in all those who we knew 100% their status without hearing from them, we still had about 19 invites who we honestly have NO CLUE if they would be able to join us or not.

HOW HARD is it to

1: Make a check mark next to yes or no
2: Seal envelope
3: drop in mail box

Or alternatively
1) Log onto Internet
2) go to wedding website
3) Click RSVP
4) Click Submit

I am trying so hard to make my wedding enjoyable for these lovely people whom we care deeply about, by having transportation to and from the festivities, a block of discounted hotel rooms, and putting information everywhere for them. Seems the least they could do would be to let me know if they can make it. I still have people telling me they don't know if they can make it ?! I mean really.

We also have an acceptance rate of about 62%. While this is not SUPER low, and I know it's due to the economy, the fact that much of our list would have to travel to California. His family from the east coast, and a smattering of mine from various points in the country (we also had 3 international guests) I still can't help feeling a bit sad when I see a no response.

I understand the financial and other burdens that come with travel, and as much as I truly appreciate and am grateful and excited to see the guests that are able to make it, It doesn't make the fact that two of my oldest friends (known both since I was about 12, and was a bridesmaid for both of them) won't be able to be there easier to swallow. Especially when they don't respond to your calls/emails/texts about whether or not they actually CAN make it.

Have you had to hunt people down for their RSVP, were you disappointed that more people couldn't make it, did you have other worries about your numbers such as venue catering minimums, or capacity concerns ?

Four Score

2008-08-04T23:34:00.000-07:00

... and one year ago (well, maybe just one year) The FI proposed to me at ocean beach. To celebrate being (almost) one month away we went out to dinner at beach chalet where we went to dinner to celebrate our engagement (also upstairs from where our rehearsal dinner will be) and had a lovely dinner and a glass of champagne after our dancing lessons.

Everyone told me it would go by quickly, (and trust me, I believed them) so I've tried to savor every moment of this stage of our relationship.
I've truly enjoyed choosing colors, linens, and flowers, having meetings and tastings to attend, looking at lovely pictures of weddings on the net for hours at a time to get inspired. It sometimes has left me with a sense of OMGDONTASKMETOMAKEANOTHERDECISION and there have been some stress filled tears shed once (Ok, maybe twice)

With one month left to go
I'm anxious to get everything on the "to do list" all taken care of and ready to go, I'm excited for all of my frinds and family to start coming into town, but most of all I am sooo excited to start this new chapter in my life with a wonderful man by my side.

Moss landing

2008-06-16T22:46:00.000-07:00

As part of our centerpieces we are using two of these these swirly metal and glass candle holders on either side of a larger candle holder.

They are a little plain, so in order to bring in the natural element of the look that I am going for, my mom and I decided to create a ring to go at the base of the "cup" part of the holder.

We used light weight cardboard, and used the top of the cup as a guide for the circle, We cut that out by hand (Yes, my hands got tired) then used a circle punch for the center. I wish there had been an easier way to get the center of the ring out because they were almost too thick for the hold punch to get through, and it was time consuming not to be able to get through a stack of them at once.

After we finished cutting them all out we gave them a good coating of spray adhesive.
and placed moss over it. It got rather messy at times having to do both sides of the rings, and at times the moss didn't want to adhere very easily at times.

Here is a pile of the completed rings. It took about 5 hours to get these all completed. We made about 80 rings all together since we're having 15 tables, and two small holders, and the larger holder has 3 of the glass holders as well.

Here it is all complted with the ring on. This makes it look a bit more yellow, but reall the moss lends some nice green to the holders, and the centerpiece in general. It was a project that took a while, but it changes up the holder and makes it look less like it was just purchased a plunked on the table.

Have you done any DIY projects in order to "punch up" something store bought ?

and pretty maids all in a row

2008-05-16T10:53:00.000-07:00

... So getting Bridesmaid dresses hasn't been one of the easiest tasks for me to tackle. I knew the color from the beginning was going to be purple. I also knew for the formality and location of my wedding a tea length dress would be the best option.

But I also have bridesmaids who are not all made of the same shape and size. I considered having them each wear different styles, but I've always kinda liked matched dresses. I decided to go with Alfred Angelo, as they are affordable, and they made the Jr. Bridesmaids dresses, and colors would coordinate. I asked each of them to look at the website and choose some favorites.

They came up with

I liked all of them. The hard part came when we tried to get everyone together to try them on and see them in person. Even though my Bridesmaids are all with in an hour drive, we all have different schedules and things going on (one had just given birth, one is pregnant)

I went with a bridal salon called Boutique des brides. Mainly because they carry the whole line of Alfred Angelo, and Alfred Angelo seemed to have the shade of purple I was looking for.
It is a small place, but the place is stocked with samples of the whole alfred angelo line, and a majority of Bill Levkoff. Hilda, who runs it is very helpful and pretty much let us have run of the place, trying on whatever caught our fancy.
The girls ended up choosing the dress on the far right. We all felt it would be most flattering on everyone.

We asked Hilda's opinion about what to do about sizing for my pregnant Maid of Honor. She suggested that we go up one size from what her bust measurement would require us to order for her. (at that time she was abou 5 months pregnant). Hopefully that should give enough wiggle room, as she has 4 months of time for losing baby weight.

I am pleased with the selection, and Alfred Angelo dresses seem to have fairly good fabric and details used ! I am excited to see them in person when they come in !

I don't think we're in Kansas anymore... (or choosing a venue.. the FINAL installment)

2008-04-09T21:20:00.000-07:00

The seed for this venue was actually planted before we were even engaged.

The story goes that the fiance's dad was having a business dinner in Houston. He was asking the FFIL about how his family was, and he mentioned "oh well if your son ever wants to get married at the venue in his area let me know. I can help. When my Fiancee mentioned this to me, I was excited and wary at the same time. I was excited because it is a fairly unique location. I was wary because it was.....

THE ZOO !

I was excited about the idea of somewhere so unique. It was also one of the first places we went on a date, it's across the street from where he proposed, it was IN the city. There were several pluses before even visiting. My worries was that it wouldn't have the element of elegance and slight formality I was looking for.

We arrived and met with the event coordinator. She was very nice, answered all of our questions with out making it feel like she was trying to "sell" to us, and gave us a packet of all the necessary information we needed.

She showed us the several areas that are available to rent. This is the circular patio where ceremonies can be held. The arch pictured is not there normally there. There is lush trees and flowers around the whole area though.

Cocktail will be on the Africian savanna. The guests will walk a little further into the zoo and there is a patio that looks out onto the African savanna habitat where the animals will still be wandering. We can also choose to have animal encounters where zoo volunteers will bring some smaller animals for guests to pet !

The reception will be here in the great hall. It is a reception room that can fit up to 200 people. It has high wood beamed vaulted ceilings, a stone fire place, and one wall has floor to ceiling windows and sliding doors that lead out onto a patio area. It has an feel of rustic/natural but can still be dressed up quite nicely. The pricing was not crazy out of line, and was very inclusive (Linens, tables, chairs, glassware all included). I was excited !

I still wasn't completely sold however, because even though it was much more than I had hoped for in the elegance department, it was nothing in comparison to getting married at the Legion of honor. We went home and crunched the numbers for each venue, and did pro con lists. Since they each were different in the way the charged, we tried to come up with our best estimates of the price for everything we would need (space, chairs, tables, food, etc) at each venue.

It turns out the zoo to be one of the cheapest options. They also had a date that worked for us available. It took us about two weeks to make the final decision, we debated having a ceremony at the Legion of honor, with a zoo reception, pictures at the legion, or some other venue, we contemplated Wente again (although not very heavily because of the date constraints) we tinkered with many options.

In the end we decided it would be easier for everyone to have the ceremony and reception at one venue, and that it was so unique, and the room had such personality that we called them, and sent our deposit.

In sickness and in health

2008-04-08T09:41:00.000-07:00

I don't think any of the weddings I've been to recently have included these words from the traditional wedding vows. For my Fiance and I, whether or not we end up choosing to have them included in the actual ceremony, they have special meaning. After Mrs. Lemon's post on wedding bee, it gave me courage to write about how medical issues have effected my relationship and wedding planning.

While neither of us have issues which require 24/7 special medical attention or that make us not be able to have a"normal" life; we both have medical conditions that we've dealt with our whole lives, and will effect our relationship through out our years together.

In fact I think our understanding of each other's medical issues and shared experiences of many Dr. visits and scary medical tests when we were young is one of the things that helped us bond.

My fiance has epilepsy. (it is actually much misunderstood disorder, and epilepsy foundation has a lot of info if you have time, click the link and take a gander!) He has dealt with it since he was very young. His is very well controlled with daily medication, and I don't expect any problems. However unlike a seating chart, signature drink, or first dance, all the planning in the world can not guarantee a seizure free wedding day. It's something you have to take as it comes.

I have a genetic condition effecting one in 2,000 women. While my medical issue does not effect me, or my fiancee as much on a day to day basis as his epilepsy, it certainly will effect our marriage. It (pretty much 100%) will make it necessary for us to get A LOT of medical help to bring any little ones into the world, and requires me to visit a Dr. a bit more often than most.

We both have known about each others' medical struggles since the first few months of our relationship. It was hard in the beginning to figure out how and when to tell him about it, especially since it's not something that I share with many people. He has always been supportive and caring, and I try to be the same way.

It's not always easy. Even though I know he's not really in immediate danger from a seizure, they are scary, and I do worry about him. We just don't let it get in our way. We do what we have to do to deal with it (Hello Ambulance bill we received since he's in a waiting period for insurance at a new job!), and move on.

We have discussed having donations to the foundations for our conditions as favors at our wedding. I know this is a hot button issue, so we'll see if it works out !

Has anyone else had to deal with either a medical issue of their partner, or worry about how and when to explain theirs to their partner. Did you work it into your wedding day at all ?

Third times the charm ?! (or Our search for a venue part 3)

2008-04-07T09:55:00.000-07:00

Ok, so I lied... third time wasn't the charm for us, but I did LOVE The Brazilian room.
It is in the Berkeley hills, in a Tilden county park, and is surrounded by trees, and flowers.

This is what the guests would see as they walked toward the building. Soo pretty, with the flower garden, right ?!

The ceremonies are performed out doors over looking a fabulous view of the hills beyond the park.

Here it is all dressed up for wedding. Those windows are floor to ceiling and also afford a view of the hills beyond and the patio courtyard area where the ceremonies are held.

It is run by the county park and recreation department, and they have "open houses" for people to come see the space instead of personal appointments.

At these open houses, they also have various "preferred" vendors showing their stuff. There were 2 caterers with h'or dourves and drinks, musicians, and 2 florists who had set up some pretty table scapes. All of this gave a much better idea of how the room looked when actually set up for a wedding.

I loved everything about this place. It would fit our 100 person guest list, it had a beautiful area for an outdoor ceremony, AND the rental fee is nominal, especially if you live in Alameda County (which my father does)

The problems were
Because it is an extremely beautiful place, at extremely fair pricing, it is VERY hard to get a date you want. We would've been limited to a morning slot, or a Friday evening wedding, and we started searching for venues a year and 4 months in advance. We didn't have a specific date in mind in the beginning either, just a two month span.

They also have rules about the music. They also are very strict about the ending time if your reservation. You can't even pay a fee for over time. There are more, but these are the ones that bothered me the most.

Because of the price, and the beauty of the building and its surroundings it still remained on our list of possibilities until we found..... THE place... More to come....

First rule of Real Estate LOCATION LOCATION LOCATION !!!!!!! or( where we will get married part 2)

2008-04-03T13:53:00.000-07:00

So after heading out to Wente, and deciding it was a bit too far and a bit to "cookie cutter"
We looked closer to the city, actually we looked IN the city at the Legion of honor Museum. Info to Rent the legion of honor IT. IS. GORGEOUS

This a a photo of the outside of the building. It definitely has that indescribable "ohhh... Ahhh" factor when you arrive and approach the building.

You can have your ceremony in this gorgeous greek inspired courtyard/entry way with Rodin's Thinker

PLUS it's on top of a hill, so there are view like this ALL around for picture taking !

The bummer is, unless you want to shell out 20,000 JUST for the fee to rent a gallery your reception is held. Just not as awe inspiring as everything else about this venue, and this is where guests would spend most of their time. They also do offer to do a tent in an outside courtyard, which could be a good option.

The "awe" factor definitely tugged on our imaginations and *almost* made up for the (I think) kinda blah look of the actual reception area. However when we started looking into the costs of the little extras they charge for... like coming in the main beautiful entrance way, Extra time at the end of the evening, security, tent rental if we didn't want the "blah" reception room, etc... it started to get WAAYYY out of control financially. Then we thought of another factor. The weather. Our date was chosen to give us prime weather (Aug. and Sept. are usually VERY reliable good weather months in San Francisco. even so the location on top of the hill lends itself to lots of wind and fog, even if the lower lying areas of the city are calm and blue, so we were nervous about guests being cold in an out door setting.

So..... we kept looking.

TOPLESS CAKE: Wanted for indecent exposure

2008-04-02T09:54:00.000-07:00

FROM WIKIPEDIA The origins of the tradition of the wedding cake date back to medieval times, when each guest at a wedding was supposed to bring a small cake, the cakes would be stacked on the table in levels and layers (If the bride and groom were able to kiss over the top of the stack it was considered good luck). These cake stacks would eventually merge into one cake and evolve into the modern wedding cake.

There is even more to the article if you care to learn more about the origins of the wedding cake. But for now, for now I don't want to talk about the cake ! I want to find something to dress up the top of it so the poor thing doesn't have to go topless !

I know the monograms are popular, but I'm not so much a fan of those. Also not so much a fan of the traditional stoic bride and groom topper either. So I have gone in search of something a bit different I found some here (designstudio.com)

- Wouldn't this look fab with bouquets or centerpieces that used calla lilies ?!

This one is one I'm thinking of using myself ! I think it's whimsical, and contains swirls AND my it's my colors, and it's sparkly and and and it's just perfect ! ( and it's $60...maybe not so perfect, we'll see)

I think this one would look very pretty amongst some real or sugar flowers to add some sparkle!

Here are some neat porcelain ones which you can purchase h ere (wedding collectibles.com)

- a snowflake for a winter wedding?! I think so !

A bride and groom, but in a bit less traditional way, I love the way this has "movement"

Another bride and groom, in color, but still I think different than the traditional "bride and groom topper"

and some very creative ones I found here (design by dorian)

This would be cute for a reception with a travel or Parisian feel

Then there is this one ! It is certainly..... different ! It is called "love never dies"

I shall continue my search for the perfect top so that my cake will not have to go around topless at my wedding !!!!!!!!!!

OH where oh where will our wedding be ?!

2008-03-22T10:46:00.000-07:00

This was the main question facing us after he popped the question.

We were very excited and started searching around a few weeks after we got engaged. The night we got engaged we briefly discussed some very loose conditions

- Neither one of us was attached to a church ceremony
- Neither one of us wanted a hotel ball room
- It would be in California
- Needed to hold 100 people
- I didn't want to HAVE to be out at a certain time.
- I wanted no restrictions on the music
- Didn't want a place that had 2 weddings in 1 day if it could be avoided.

When I thought about my wedding before being engaged, I had always kinda wanted to get married in Tahoe. It is GORGEOUS there. The mountains, the crystal blue lake, mountain tops with views.
There are plenty of options for someone wanting to have an outdoor ceremony. The only trouble is it's 4 hours from San Francisco. There is an airport there, but it's small and therefore more expensive to fly into versus a major airport like San Francisco, or Sacramento. With the amount of out of town guests we were expecting, it didn't seem practical to ask them to spend great amounts on plane tickets, or fly in, then travel an additional 4 hours from San Fran or 2.5 hours from Sacramento to get to our wedding location. So we reluctantly decided against looking in Tahoe.

The first place where we made an appointment to look was at Wente Vineyards in Livermore, (about an hour outside of the city)

They have two venues for wedding receptions and ceremonies. The first is at the main Wente vineyard, where you can have an outdoor ceremony, and dine inside, or have a tented reception one of their large lawns. The left is the main event center building where the indoor dining takes place if you choose, and on the right is a set up for an untented ceremony. There are more photos on their website, as I don't believe these quite do it justice.
The second is about 5 minutes from the main event center. It is called Murietta's Well. It is a spanish style building and holds less people. If you choose this location your ceremony is in an actual wine barrel cellar.
The top photo is the outside of the building. Again it is not done justice as in person there are more flowers, and some really neat tiled steps up to a patio area where they would hold cocktail hour over looking the foothills. The bottom photo is a photo of the wine cellar area.

This is the type of venue that is in THE wedding business. They have an office where you go in watch a video, look at photos of past weddings, etc then speak to a coordinator (IE; sales person)
The event coordinator was very nice answered all questions, was on time, and responded to all E mail and phone calls quickly. I did feel she was a bit "sales-y" however. Also they have very limited availability for the months we were looking into (August and September) and if you chose Murietta's well (which I preferred) it was a MUST to be out by10:30, and there was limitations on music because of the houses in the hills above. We had tried outside the city limits hoping to save some moeny, however they also had minimums for food and such which, while in our budget, would've stretched the amount of other little things we could do.

We kept looking....

A rose by any other name...

2008-03-18T16:21:00.000-07:00

The changing of your name is a point of great deliberation for many women. They have to decide if they are going to take their husband's name (and whether to actually use it, or just keep it changed on paper), keep their maiden name, hyphenate, or form some new name with both names. (I had a middle school teacher who did this) . Then you have to listen to others opinions on the matter, whether you asked for their advice or not.

I have decided to change my name when the time comes. It will be a bit strange, I'm sure to change something that has defined me for my whole life. But this is a new stage of life I (we) are entering into, and I think it will be exciting enter that stage together, with the same last name.

That being said, it's not so easy to actually go about doing it. But I have found a website that can help ! www.missnowmrs.com They charge a fee, but it could be worth paying to save the time and headache. If you want to go the do it yourself route there is a good article at about.com. about what you need to do to change your name !

YOU LIKE ME, YOU REALLY REALLY LIKE ME !

2008-03-12T22:09:00.000-07:00

We sent out our save the date magnets last week, and have gotten many excited responses on our wedding website about them ! A cousin of my fiance whom he has not heard from in a very long time even wrote on our guest book that he has saved the date and is coming ! I received a message from my mom's cousin that they are honored to be included in my day.

It really just got me thinking how excited I am, and how awesome it is that our wedding (and weddings in general) can bring families together. I can't remember a time when my whole family was in one place at one time, and it may be one of the only times in my life where it will happen, and if this brings my fiance into contact with his cousin again, budget schmudget, everything was worth every penny.

Besides, you now marrying such a fabulous man, I think seeing all of my friends and family in one place at one time is going to be the most amazing part of the whole weekend, and make all the obsessing and planning and research Oh so worth it ! What are you most looking forward to about your wedding day ?

Double feature !

2008-03-04T20:29:00.000-08:00

GUESS what website is featured on www.weddingtracker.com ?? That's right !! www.colinandcara.com !!!!! WOOOHOOO I literally squealed when I saw it ! The fiancee just laughed and shook his head at my excitement. I'm not sure why we were chosen, but it is pretty cool, and it has brought up our visitor count by quite a bit !

I have a FEVER !!

2008-02-26T20:57:00.000-08:00

.... and the only cure is... MORE DANCING !!!!
I LOVE dancing. I took lessons when I was young. I did the recital every year, did musical theatre, talent shows, made up dances with my friends for back yard or living performances, it was my thing.

The fiance was a lacrosse player, and computer nerd. He doesn't have any formal dance training at all, and doesn't really like dancing that much. He is a very good sport about going out to the dance floor with me when we go out, but it's not something he's super comfortable with.

So we decided to sign up for dance lessons ! We will be going to shake and groove
they were recommended by our coordinator, and were very nice when I talked to them on the phone ! They teach all types of dancing. We will be taking private lessons, but they also will do "mini group lessons" if you'd like your whole wedding party to attend. Their site says they will;

Choreograph a dance for you including an entrance and a dip. Whether you prefer something traditional and classic or fun and modern, we can create beautiful first dance for any style or any song you choose. (quoted from the shake and groove website)

We also thought about using Bayareaweddingdance.com, but shake and groove was a bit more economical, and pretty much offered the same service. If the dance isn't something at the top of your priority list, and don't care to invest the cost of the private lessons, you can always go to the dance store online
and order one of their DVDs, or take a ballroom dance class at your local community college.

We're still playing around with a few different ideas, for the song. We want it to be special to us, but also be entertaining for our guests. We don't want to go out there and do the "7th grade hug sway" dance, as that gets boring for all involved.

What did you do to prepare for the big "first dance" how did you choose the music to dance to ?

Yes, and how does that make you feel ?

2008-02-07T22:22:00.001-08:00

So this past weekend we attended. Marriage Prep 101 with about 13 or so other couples. We both enjoyed it and learned some good stuff. We decided to do it just to get some good conflict resolution skills, and to make sure we got everything that could be an "issue" ironed out.

I think this course did that very well. We learned several methods for good communication, and conflict resolution which I think will be good for us. One was simply letting the other person talk for 5 minutes with no interruptions. This makes sure they have said everything they want to say, and evens out the playing field if one person tends to talk more than the other.

There was also an exercise which I found interesting where we went through several statements regarding our expectations; such as I expect that my partner will be my best friend. I expect that we will have 0, 1, 2, 3, 4 or more children. We each went through the various statements marking the response we agreed with most, then compared our answers, and discussed any differences and how we would deal with them.

There was also time to talk about finances, and even a "sex and intimacy" section to the weekend. All exercises were only discussed with your partner, not the entire group, so there was no chance of feeling put on the spot about anything, and the husband and wife psychologist team who lead the weekend were available for consult during any exercises.

Being very social, the only thing that disapointed me a bit was the fact that I didn't really get a chance to talk to the other people at the workshop, besides at lunch. At the end we even got a certificate of completion !

I think this was a very good thing for us to do, and recommend all couples do something similar. (or sign up for this one, they do it several times a year ! ) I know many churches do pre marital counseling as well.

POW RIGHT TO THE MOON !

2008-01-31T21:36:00.000-08:00

When we first started thinking about our honeymoon we had a few things in mind.

We wanted to go somewhere neither of us had been - (keeping to this idea lead us to "tropical" since both our vacation/travel histories are heavy on "big city", we decided "secluded and "relaxing" sounded GREAT)

We wanted to go for a week

We were hoping for all inclusive (or at least a la carte pre-paid so we wouldn't' spend much once we got there)

We started with a list that included all the "typical" places.

Caribbean
Fiji
Tahiti
Hawaii

then I discovered the Maldives

We started by looking up places on Luxury link which is like E-bay for luxury vacations. After searching, we found Maldives was probably a little bit above our budget. We also found that looking so far in advance wasn't a bonus to a site like Luxury Link since a lot of these are trying to fill rooms with in the next few months.

I think attended the 5 Star afternoon wedding show, where I met Corey from
all about hon eymoons I gave her a bit of what we were thinking that day when we chatted at the show, and later that week she called, asked us some more specific questions about what we were looking for in a honeymoon, and our budget, and sent us proposals. She even gave us a suggestion we hadn't thought about before; Belize.

We started out with a proposal for Tahiti (Bora Bora) the Maldives (which was actually surprisingly priced, if it weren't for the airfare) and Belize. Bora Bora was VERY tempting with is Crystal Blue water, and it's reputation for being one of THE best honeymoon spots. However, with the budget we had set we could only stay for 5 days, and it's a LONG flight. Corey worked very hard to get us resorts in our budget, with activities and the atmosphere we were after, and I think she did a great job because it was VERY hard to choose.

But when we saw this We knew that BELIZE was the winner.

We will be spending 7 days in a casita at victoria house Snorkling, chilling in our hammock, and RELAXING. WE ARE ALL BOOKED and I'M SOO EXCITED !!!!

uh oh oh oh oh..... THE WRITE STUFF !

2008-01-31T20:58:00.000-08:00

If anyone in the Bay Area is looking to DIY the addresses on their wedding invites, escorts cards, or needs some instruction in the art Caligraphy check out Atelier Gargoyle.

They are based in San Francisco, and do a workshop once a month. The next one is on Feb 23rd. (call 415-864-2928) They even provide the pens and ink for the lesson if you don't care to invest in the tools of the trade right away. They sell seals and wax as well if you want to give your invites that old world charm. I think I may go so that I can do the writing on my escort cards !

Thank you Daily Candy for this info !

My inspiration Board

2008-01-26T22:29:00.000-08:00

So I have been struggling with a theme/mood for my wedding for a while. As I've said before my venue could go so many ways. I have finally come up with a very loose "midsummer's night dream" theme. No, there won't be fairies everywhere, but it will include everything else that midsummer's night dream makes me think of, magic, nature, and romance.

Our Decor will basically include, a "swirl" theme incorporated throughout our stationary, and other items, which I hope will evoke a "whimsical" feel. I also intend to use lots of light in the form of candles and up lighting for the walls, which I hope will give the venue a sense of "night magic" The other thing that I'm attempting to do to carry out the midsummer's night dream theme is to have the decor have a sense of being natural.

The arch the florist is making will be of manzinita branches, the center pieces will also contain manzanita as well, Moss will be used in places, as well as wood for place card holders, and dark wood baskets to hold programs and flip flops for feet of tired guests.

I decided to put together a board to help direct me. Below are the fruits of my labor. (all photos from the knot or weddinghchannel.com)

A lot of these photos I notice have incorporated some lavender in with the brighter purple, and green, so I'm thinking about that now as well. I hope you all get the same feeling looking at this board as I am trying to evoke.

LITTLE BLUE BOX ?!

2008-01-21T21:30:00.000-08:00

No, I didn't get something from Tiffany's... but I did get something new today ! a PLANNER !We are going to hire little blue box weddings for our wedding !

I met with Nicol, asked her some questions, chatted about what I had done already, and what I would need in a coordinator. I think it's going to be a really good decision for us. They take care getting all of the things that need to get to the venue there (centerpiece components, escort cards etc), keep our vendors on track, and make sure that the whole day comes together smootly.

I asked her several questions I found on the realsimple.com website. Their suggested questions are:

have you worked with the venue or any of the vendors I have in mind ?

who are your favorite florists , bands, and caterers ?

how many weddings a month do you handle ?

How do you charge ?

What services are included in the price you will be paying ?

Always ask for refrences from vendors, and couples who the planner has worked with.
In the end a lot has to do with personality and what exactly you're looking for, day of services, full coordination, or some sort of combination.

I think Nicol and I will work very well together, and she has some great ideas already !

Visions of Martha dance in my head

2008-01-20T21:18:00.002-08:00

So I participated in the weddingbee.com valentine's day swap. The criteria were simple 3 DIY cards, sent to different people. The original inspiration for the cards came from DIY NETWORK. I am quite proud of the way they turned out, and hope that the ladies that receive them get a smile and some valentine's day cheer when they open them !

This is the final product

The directions:

1) Cut a sheet of Bright pink card stock to 5 1/2" x 8 1/2" (or get a pre made card this side) and score to make a single fold card.

2) cut a piece of light pink card stock to to 5 1/4 " x 4"

3) pencil a horizontal line 2 inches from the top of the lighter pink sheet

4) make another horizontal line 1/2 inch below the first

5) Evenly space 6 vertical lines, cut with a craft knife to make slits for ribbon

7) Weave ribbon through the slits

8) Place 1x2 inch double stick adhesive on a scrap of the contrasting color, and with a 1/2 inch heart hole punch, punch out three hearts.

9) peel off protective sheet, and dip hearts in glitter

10) use rubber cement to attach the heart between the ribbon slits on the card stock.

11) Use a valentine's day stamp and stamp below the ribbon

12) If desired use embossing powder on the stamp

14) use spray adhesive to secure the front card stock to the folded card.

I think this card is SUPER cute, and could even be used as a shower, or bachelorette invite !

Start from the very beginning (a very good place to start)

2008-01-16T21:28:00.000-08:00

I have a tendency to jump into things head first with great enthusiasm, so I just realized after all this blogging, I haven't told the story of my engagement here on this blog !

PICTURE IT ! San Francisco 2007 ( previous line to be said in the manner of Sophia Patrillo of Golden Girls fame) Very early on a Saturday morning at the beginning of August (the 4th to be exact and I do mean early, like 6:30 am. ) I wake up to hear some noise at the door, then my phone starts ringing. It was the (at that point) boyfriend.
"hello ?" I rasped in my groggy half sleep state
"come let me in" he says, an urgent tone to his voice.
Slightly confused and still in a brain fog, I respond "OK, I'm coming".
I stalk, zombie like down the stairs, undo the chain on the door that was keeping him out, half hug, half fall on him from drowsiness and ask "what are you doing
here ?" My reply was a simple "go back to sleep"
Still to tired to really protest, or ask more questions, I did as I was told and returned to bed.

At around 8:30 or so I am beginning to rouse again, and am slightly aware of fabulous food scents in the air. After about 20 minutes of being in and out of sleep I get a kiss on the forehead telling me to wake up. When I open my eyes I see him standing there with breakfast for me. Biscuits, bacon, eggs, fruit, orange juice, the works. We sit and eat on my bed for a while, then he tells me we are going to go go-Kart racing, which is something neither one of us has done.

We drive about half an hour to the Go Kart place, have a great time zooming around the track in our racing suits and helmets. We then went and had some lunch. As we head back up home, I get a call from my friend Stephanie who says she wants to meet up at the beach later, but she's not sure what time. We head back to my apartment, where we just chill and helps me out with some laundry. Stephanie calls, and says she's going to be there at the beach and come on by. I ask Colin if he wants to go and he says yeah it could be good. I tell him I don't really want to go because it's all yucky and foggy and grey out.

He convinces me to go, and as we're walking we see a sandcastle in the distance (a pretty big one too) so I mention it, and say cool someone built a sandcastle ! Colin stops to use the phone for a second, and we keep walking, as we pass the sandcastle he stops and we turn and look at it.
spelled out in sticks is "will you marry me Cara"

He then got down on one knee, (it's still hotly debated whether or not I actually said the words "yes" right then) I say I chocked them out through the tears, and he didn't hear. (There were a lot of tears as evidenced by the make up all over his white sweatshirt)

He says he had to ask me when he stood up to hug me after putting the ring on my finger. He then read me a note that he had written to me when we first started dating that talked about the journey we were beginning on, and how excited he was. After I made tearful calls to my family and friends We then went back home and changed and had dinner at the Beach Chalet restaurant.

That night we stayed at a lovely
boutique hotel downtown hotel Monaco.

You maybe wondering about the significance of the other activities of the day. They were all things I'd mentioned (even jokingly) he never does (IE: why don't you ever do _____ for me ?) He had a list and everything he did that day was part of that list. Cooked breakfast in bed, make the plans for the whole day, help me with the laundry, the dishes, send me extra sweet text messages, etc. The day before around the time I was leaving work I received a text message 24 hours of I never begins now. I texted back a "?" and got the response "I love you so deeply".
The whole thing was part of what he later called 24 hours of "I never" so thoughtful !

Over the next few days we continued to spread the news to people, and I just kept staring at the sparkly bling on my finger, and thinking about what a great guy I got, and how lucky I am.

WE HAVE STDS !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (but, in a good way!)

2008-01-14T21:10:00.000-08:00

I am beyond escatic because we got our sample save the date magnet today !!!!!!!!!! We ordered them from www.magnetqueen.com. I found their customer service VERY helpful and friendly. They answered my questions about a custom graphic quickly, and had the sample of my magnet in my hands two working days later. All of their orders also come with the envelope and protective plastic sleeve in the photo to send out to your guests. The magnets are very good quality, and any 300 DPI photo can be used.

If you have some time before you need to send them out ( as we do) you can use code COOLDOWN and get free shipping, and 50% off your order. Orders with this code will ship after about 28 days. If you can't wait a month use code MAG20, receive 20% off, and items will ship after 13 days. Very good incentive to order early !

The idea came while I was waiting for the train day after work. I was looking at the various signs on the cars N Judah Ocean Beach, M Oceanview, L taraval 46th ave ZOO .... WAIT A SECOND it SAYS it goes to the ZOO, THAT'S where my wedding is !!

Now, I KNEW the L train goes out to the zoo, but I never really thought about how the actual SIGN on the train says it goes to the zoo. Then I got to thinking about what if we did a save the date graphic with our faces in the window of a L train to the zoo, and on the area where there is usually an advertisement, put another one of our engagement photos ?!

I came home, told the fiance (aka "photoshop man") to make it so, and ( after a few months of procrastinating since it really didn't HAVE to get done yet. The graphic came to be ! YEA ! I thought this would be a very cool way to get people excited for the trip to San Francisco, and get our date on their calendars ! it doesn't really have anything to do with the rest of the wedding, but I figure the actual invites should do that.

Did you want to give a tease of your theme or venue with your save the date, or did you just do something totally fun and different ?

You're not from around here, are you ?

2008-01-13T20:38:00.000-08:00

Most of my fiance's friends and family, as well as a handful of my part of the guest list will be coming from across the country. We want to make sure they know we appreciate them spending money on the trip out to join us and welcome them to San Francisco.

I believe we will start out by having these lovely welcome door hangers from Martha Stewart.

It's a fairly easy project to do.

1) Cut a legal sized Legal-size (8 1/2 by 14 inches) card stock . card stock in half lengthwise. (if you like you can print "welcome across the top with your printer before cutting, I did something a bit different)

2) We then stamped a decorate swirl in the corner and the word welcome across at the top of the paper, sprinkled each with embossing powder and put them under the embossing heat gun.

3) We then made used a bone folder to make a fold 4 inches from the top, and folded it up to make the pocket.

4) We then punched a hole with a 2.5 in circle punch. We put glue stick on the scrap punches and used them as the circles to seal in the sides (as in Martha's Version above)

All complete !

In the hangar, we will be including inserts of things to do in the city, a map, a list of our favorite restaurants, and an itinerary of wedding events. The hangars will hold a post card size quite comfortably ( a bit bigger would be ok as well) We will also be giving them some San Francisco sourdough, and Ghiradelli chocolate.

Things for people to do in San Fran:
Coit Tower
Alcatraz
Union Square shopping
Palace of Fine arts
Ocean Beach (where we got engaged ! )
Cliff House
Museum of Modern art
Yurba Buena Gardens
Golden Gate Bridge

As an out of town guest is there any more information you would want or need to make your stay go smoothly ?

TASTES LIKE CHICKEN !!

2008-01-10T11:42:00.000-08:00

Yesterday I contacted the catering manager of to set up an initial tasting. HOORAY FOR FOOD !

It shall be sometime in March, whenever the Future In-Laws can make it out to visit. We have to choose several options from
the menu.

We have to Choose:

3 appetizers
2 salads
3 entrees
2 veggies
2 side dishes (starches)
4 desserts

Since Everyone knows dessert is the best part of any meal, I decided to ask you lovely readers which three of these "petite sweets" you'd most enjoy having ?! I'm thinking one should be chocolaty, one fruity, and the third choice just whatever seems to say EAT MEEEEE EAT MEEEE (of course you don't have to make your selections based on these criteria !) These will most likely be served in the later part of the evening after the cake has been cut. I will be sure to include notes from the tasting after we have it !

DUN DUN DUNDUN

2008-01-09T10:29:00.000-08:00

I am a VERY big music person. I listen to all different types of music, I've studied music (although I admit I'm STILL not too adept at reading music and music theory) I was always in choirs growing up, have taken vocal lessons, performed in musical theater, (basically sing wherever I can) written lyrics, etc. It is no surprise that the music for my wedding is very important to me.

That being said, I'm not the type of music lover, who casts off everything mainstream as "commercial Crap" or stops listening to my favorite band because they "sold out to the industry" We chose a DJ to provide the music for the day, mainly because I personally would rather KNOW the songs I hear are going to sound how I expect them to sound rather than worry about trying different bands to find one who I like enough ( and is in the budget !)

While I had known I wanted to put lots of thought into the music, I hadn't thought of how MUCH thought it required until I went to my DJ's planning area of the site, and saw all the places where they wanted input. Music while guests arrive and mingle, parent's entrance, bridal processional, anything during the ceremony, recessional, cocktail hour, entrance of the bride and groom (Jock JAMS! Anyone ? LOL) It's all a bit overwhelming !

While looking at this I realized while I know know A LOT of songs, it's hard to think of appropriate ones ON DEMAND when asked "what do you want played before or after the cake cutting (if anything) So I went to my friend and yours google.com and found some sources of inspiration.

Wedj.com

WedAlert.com

OurWeddingSongs.com

My main goal with the musical selections (and some of the main advice I've seen about wedding music) is to consider the music as a "soundtrack" of sorts helps give the event a flow and cohesiveness, and can add to the emotion of the day. Choosing background music where appropriate (perhaps that enhance your use of a theme), and highlight certain moments with key songs that have meaning, and important to you as a couple.

My goal is also to keep the crowd dancing and having a fun time ! so I intend to choose a variety of music from different eras and genres to please everyone.

Some other things to consider about music and the "official dances"

Some churches may have restrictions on types of music

TALK TO YOUR BAND AND DJ to make sure you are on the same page about what to play when- This is one of the great things I like about our DJ. They have a detailed online planning area that you fill in with what you want played when, then you have a meeting with them to discuss things in more detail closer to the wedding. Something so concrete is not totally necessary, but COMMUNICATION IS KEY !

Well I'm off in search of the perfect soundtrack ! When I create it I shall post my play list here!