Fight To Survive

Support G.I. Resistance!

2007-12-27T12:54:00.000-05:00

"The morale, discipline and battleworthiness of the U.S. Armed Forces are…lower and worse than at any time in this century and possibly in the history of the United States…our army…is in a state of approaching collapse, with individual units avoiding or having refused combat, murdering their officers and non commissioned officers, drug-ridden, and dispirited where not near mutinous."
- Col. Robert D. Heinl, Jr.
The Collapse of the Armed Forces
Armed Forces Journal, June 7, 1971

"Mutiny is the conscience of war."
-Common graffiti written by soldiers in the trenches of World War One

Much noise is being made today as to what true GI Resistance actually means. In a confusing, often obfuscating and divisive hodgepodge of arguments, a variety of voices try to pinpoint and isolate a singularly accepted standard of GI Resistance. Sometimes in stark arrogance, members of the antiwar community bicker back and forth as to what supporting resistance entails, without actually considering the point of view of the soldier fighting the war. For instance, words like cowardice, loyalty, and even duty are used by some to attack, condescend, and humiliate war resisters, soldier dissenters, AWOL’s, and deserters. These arguments are seriously flawed, yet each stance tries to establish itself as the only acceptable means of supporting GI Resistance.

There are countless ways to crack an egg, and in a generalized effort to end the war in Iraq and Afghanistan, a plethora of tactics will be needed. Most of us know that by now. But what we fail to realize is that sometimes the means to immediately end a war start with the boots on the ground. So who then are we, as activists, veterans, and concerned citizens, to place moral standards on any soldier who would detriment the war effort in any way she or he sees fit? The question is not what GI Resistance is, but rather how can we support it any way shape or form?

One only needs to open a U.S. history book to find examples of GI resistance throughout our years of war and conquest. As far back as the American Revolution, instances of GI rebellion were common, as underpaid, underfed, and ill-equipped regulars staged mutinies and revolts against what they saw as forced conscription, colonial elitism, and rampant war profiteering. In barbarous wars such our Civil War, soldiers plagued by the torment of battle and butchery deserted in massive numbers. AWOL’s were common throughout World War I, and studies on World War II show that soldiers from both sides had tendencies to deliberately aim astray when firing projectiles at enemy combatants. But it wasn’t until the Vietnam War that the true power of an organized underclass of soldiers showed is amazing potential to end military adventurism.

Through amazing instances of organizing, communicating, and class solidarity, American service members utilized a whole array of tactics to make their stance against a war they saw as immoral and wrong. From civil disobedience to direct action--from outspoken “Rap Sessions”, antiwar coffee houses, underground newspapers, “search and evades” missions, and mass desertions, to more extreme measures as combat refusals, equipment sabotage and assassinations of commanding officers in the field--soldiers challenged the power structure of the military from within, and sent shockwaves through the establishment that were felt all the way to the architects of war in Washington, D.C.

Of course, many people within the movement used a variety of tactics to spread distrust of the political system essential in ending the war. However, it wasn’t until the very moment when the soldiers refused to fight that the powers-to-be had absolutely no other option than to pull the plug on their military aggression in Southeast Asia. The GI Revolt from that time is an amazing display of people-power, and what can be achieved through a well-organized, dedicated effort to tear down systems of oppressive power from within. Their greatest strength came from a decentralized ability to operate sporadically and pop up, much like a fungus refusing to die, uncontrollably in all corners of the American empire. The fertile conditions that nurtured their resistance came from a strong antiwar movement back home, and a tightly-held veteran-soldier solidarity to keep the resistance strongly intact.

Soldier solidarity is where we are failing today.

As activists committed to ending this war, we need to reach out to the troops who are fighting it and show them that we support GI Resistance. Soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan need to know that at home in the United States there is a dedicated activist community that will support them in resisting this illegal war at any cost.

We need to realize amongst ourselves that GI resistance is resistance by definition. Therefore, any resistance acted out by soldiers must be supported. There can be no ultimatums to supporting resistance. Whether that resistance is in the form of organizing amongst peers, starting underground ‘zines or websites, combat refusals or even acts of sabotage, we as activists must do our part to help aide and assist them, even if our assistance can only be in spirit and emotion.

We must understand that any form of resistance, even cases of AWOL and desertion, play a huge part in undermining the war effort from within. Never are we allowed to judge or discriminate against soldiers who choose to leave the military for whatever reason the soldier deems necessary. If more of the public accepted and supported AWOL and/or desertion as a justified alternative to participating in an illegal war, then perhaps we could expect more and more soldiers to quit their jobs. Ideally, one could picture the perfect scenario in which, on any given morning, the whole army fails to “show up to formation.”

At any rate, accusations of cowardice or treason are completely unacceptable. Furthermore, any soldier or veteran (especially one inclined towards an antiwar persuasion) that resorts to such patronizing derision should be reminded that such chest-beating machismo and arrogant self-righteousness is absolutely detrimental to our ultimate goal of ending the war. The whole idea is to win the soldiers trust and include them, not insult and exclude them.

Iraq Veterans Against the War is proving every day that we are the vanguard organization in the movement to ending the war. But we must remember that our credibility does not derive from media appearances, placements in protest rallies, or the medals on our uniforms. No, it comes from the fact that we are still soldiers, and we never leave another soldier behind. Our credibility lies with the soldiers that are still tied to this war, not with the public who overwhelmingly supports an immediate withdrawal, and not with the politicians promising peace with empty rhetoric. No one but the soldiers have the power to end the war now. And as an organization inherently dedicated to the soldier, our sole function should be reaching out to them, helping them to resist, helping them to come home. That is the true essence of solidarity, the true meaning of “Support GI Resistance,” and when it finally comes together, then we’ll really see the beginning of the end.

--
posted by Jeff Englehart
Iraq Veterans Against the War
www.ivaw.org

A Veterans Day Parade

2007-11-10T19:05:00.000-05:00

Coming from the opinion of an Iraq war veteran, I can testify that Veterans Day--a day of remembrance for all the veterans who sacrificed their lives, limbs, and sanity for the decency of American society--strikes me as a shallow, contemplated lie, and really does not mean a damn thing to me.

And why should it? To some, this callous attitude towards a national holiday may appear unjustified, or that as a veteran, I may sound ungrateful for it. But to frame this holiday into a rational context, I have to ask: When the negligence and indifference towards the humanity and respect of a group of people can be so easily redressed once a year on a federally mandated holiday, why should we place any amount of importance on this faux holiday of remembrance, and especially when it insults our intelligence?

In short, veterans, and the day to honor them, hold about as much importance to most Americans as Kwanza does to the Young Republicans of Texas.

For some of my closest friends and me, Veterans Day is every day, and it is a Fact that cannot be so easily praised and cheered with the enthusiastic waving of an American flag.

Many of us live through life in the solitary confines of our experiences, walking amongst the living while holding hands with the dead.

Some veterans, homeless, jobless and hungry, live day to day begging for scraps on the streets, all the while running from the demons that follow them from the war.

Other vets try desperately to placate their own personal hells, to mask their horrible disfigurement and pain by medicating through substance abuse and violence. Having been turned away from the very hospitals that bear their name, they sit in wheelchairs, with missing limbs, with jaded eyes, inebriated in front of TVs, just to forget, just to make it through the day.

Some veterans will not even be alive to see the big Veterans Day parade, because for some toiled and tired vets, suicide will be the only solution to the all-consuming problem that is their life.

For some of us, Veterans Day is much more than a day off from work, or an all-day shopping spree, or a good excuse to fire up the barbeque grill. It is an unpleasant fact. It is hiding from the ghosts of our pasts. It is living every day with an unbearable guilt. It is trying to live and maintain in a society that you feel deep in your gut is inherently sick and deranged.

It is living without hope.

As Americans, we only pretend to celebrate the honor of veterans on Veterans Day. Maybe because deep down in our national psyche, we all know that the crimes our politicians commit against helpless people in foreign countries--enforced through the strength of our troops--is ultimately dishonorable, immoral, disgusting, and wrong.

But if we truly believed in recognizing the services of our veterans, we as a people would honor our vets by removing them from the immorality of a criminal war and demand an immediate and unconditional withdrawal of American troops from Iraq and Afghanistan.

If we honestly revered the sacrifices of our soldiers returning home, we as a people would hold our government responsible for guaranteeing that every veteran in this country is afforded with free health and education services to ensure each vet has a fair opportunity to start her/his new civilian life.

In a perfect world, this is how we would honor our veterans in America. Furthermore, it would not be solely an annual event. The duty of a compassionate citizenry forcing governments to take care of its veterans would be a daily function in our lives…in a perfect world.

The reality is that America has a long history of sending young adults to the collective suicide of war, only to neglect and sweep under the rug those veterans who return home. From the stolen pensions of veterans in the Revolutionary War, to President Hoover’s military assault on the “Bonus Army” of World War I veterans in 1932, to soldiers’ Agent Orange exposure in Vietnam to Depleted Uranium exposure to Gulf War and Iraq War vets, each generation has its ugly war story to tell.

When one considers this history of negligence and insensitivity, it’s no wonder that most veterans do not think highly of Veterans Day. Much like Black History Month is to the Civil Rights struggle, or that Columbus Day is to the Native Americans, Veterans Day is the ultimate irony for the war veteran: a government-sanctioned holiday for the purposes of whitewashing the patterns of social inequality throughout the years of America’s history.

But perhaps I shouldn’t be so pessimistic about yet another great American spectacle. People are always telling me I have the stereotypical “Angry War Vet” complex brought home from Iraq. Maybe it is time I take my doctor’s advice, pop a Government-Issued Paxil, and “loosen up” a little bit. After all, Veterans Day does serve a higher, nobler purpose. Not only does it encourage blind jingoism and unquestioned obedience to the established order set forth by our ruling elite’s greed-driven capitalist regime, it also gives millions of Americans a nice and cozy “Patriotic” reason to go shopping this weekend.

Indeed, reverence through consumption, our good ol’ American pastime. And on this fine “Veterans Day-Weekend-Blow-Out-Sale-Extravaganza”, as long as the American consumer is getting a whopping 15% off on all furniture purchases at IKEA or 0% APR financing for 6 months on their brand new Ford monster truck, at least I know I did my part in fighting for the American Cause. For God, Country, and the Almighty Dollar.

posted by Jeff Englehart
aka: heckle
Iraq Veterans Against the War
www.ivaw.org

Back In The Trenches: A Perspective

2007-07-22T19:34:00.000-04:00

Germany was more or less exactly the way I left it back in 2005. On the train rides in between major cities, it was refreshing to see beautiful rolling green hillsides with deep dark forests so thick as to practically be impenetrable. Along the way, one would see quaint little villages interspersed with the beautiful countryside, with archaic stone castles towering above them from hilltops. In Frankfurt, Nuremberg, and Berlin it was a pleasure to be amongst a people and its aura with so much history and culture. I felt almost relieved having come back in Europe,

Germany

being almost like a second home to me. This time, I felt quite comfortable coming back as a civilian. In many aspects, I was reliving

Germany

under a different light. It was amazing not to constantly feel that wringing in your gut, that horrible nauseous feeling that you were an American soldier in a foreign land, and inevitably headed to the war in

Iraq

. As a civilian, it was comforting knowing that I could this time come to Germany as a representative of an organization back home that I could take great pride in,

Iraq

Veterans Against the War. Instead of being a soldier stationed in

Germany

, I would be an antiwar American diplomat, pushing the soldiers/veterans movement to all corners of the world. I liked that aspect of my journey very much.

But our trip to Germany was much more than sightseeing and touring ancient castles. It would prove to be an enduring and emotionally draining undertaking meeting with active duty soldiers in environments that created animosity and confusion. It was not easy to walk into Joe-bars and sneak onto post with an antiwar philosophy on militarism and a visual distaste for authority. Our ability to crack the wall of mistrust in soldiers proved to be difficult. However, we soon realized that being completely straightforward with an already disillusioned crowd would give us many opportunities to talk candidly with soldiers, most of who warmed to our presence immediately.

My experience with soldier outreach in Germany was an inspirational one. I learned that sometimes the most genuine resistance towards the forces of oppression can be found in the least expected, far away places.

Soldiers stationed in Germany seemingly live under a cloak of obfuscation. Being so far away from their home and a language and culture that they know and understand, soldiers are left with only The Military for sustenance, comfort, and a peace of mind. In Germany, the heavy air of discontent surrounding the Iraq War is not as prevalent as it is in the United States. The protests that the antiwar left conducts in America are largely unseen by soldiers stationed in Germany, and are therefore unknown.

Some soldiers I had talked to were completely unaware of Iraq Veterans Against the War, and once aware of such group, were suddenly motivated and encouraged towards antiwar sentiments. Being suddenly exposed to dissident thought seemed to spark a prairie fire in the minds of some soldiers we encountered.

The biggest advantage that the Army has in Germany, aside from strategic proximity to foreign countries, is that the Army chain of command has almost no difficulty placating and subduing its soldiers into an obedient mindset. With soldiers being so far away from American influence, the Army can much easier mould and indoctrinate its soldiers while living and operating in protected social bubbles…their perfect, little Army societies.

For example, I can recall a time while I was a soldier in Germany when the Army very blatantly and purposely lied to the soldiers under its command. One day, during our closing formation before the weekend, our company commander warned all us soldiers to stay away from Nuremberg that Saturday. His explanation was that there was a Nazi rally scheduled that day, and soldiers were to stay away from any trouble that may ensue. Of course, my friends and I adamantly despising Nazi-punks, decided to attend and ridicule the protestors.

However, once at the rally, we saw none other than anarchists-- brandishing black flags, wearing black masks, holding anti-imperialist signs, and burning American flags—holding a protest against the imminent invasion of Iraq. Far from the commander’s description, the protest that was held was of anarchist origin, the complete opposite of what you would expect at a Nazi rally. The Army either was willfully ignorant of the politics of anarchists, or decided to lie to its soldiers lest they be subjected to anti-imperialist, anti-American propaganda.

The US military abroad can easily instill fear, loyalty, and subservience in its soldiers at a level difficult to achieve stateside. Which is why it is indicative that when lower ranking soldiers, sergeants, and even officers largely oppose the war in Iraq, it becomes clear that a widespread resistance is beginning to foment under the surface of the Army’s ordered and regimented façade.

The Army’s presence in other countries, in Germany especially, presents an entirely different dynamic to the antiwar movement. While leftist thought is rampant in that country, soldiers surrounded by it are cut off from its leanings by an overly protective military atmosphere.

The idea that the US army in Germany was extremely paranoid by four antiwar veteran/activists proves that the soldiers stationed there are extremely vulnerable to antiwar tendencies, so much that desertion and AWOL in that environment is a major concern for them.

If there is one important lesson that I learned from my trip to Germany, it is that soldiers stationed overseas are widely ignored by the media and activist circles here at home. While antiwar talk is becoming more commonplace on our television and in our communities, the notion of antiwar sentiments found with soldiers in Germany is sometimes forgotten.

The United States has over 700 bases in around 130 different countries. With some 250,000 uniformed soldiers, sailors and Air Force personnel stationed sporadically throughout these locations, it is testament to the overwhelming size of our empire’s military. While it is unfortunate that the media does not amply cover the activities of the military in these countries, it is a mistake for the antiwar movement to ignore the enormous amount of soldiers stationed overseas. It is perhaps true that some of the most fervent and dedicated antiwar veterans today at one time had served in one or several other foreign countries, including Iraq and Afghanistan. In some cases, being exposed to other cultures and a whole array of new ideas and philosophies helped to solidify the antiwar/anti-imperialist that veteran activists carry today.

During the Vietnam War, the unpopularity of the war and the savagery that soldiers were exposed to combined to create an environment for soldiers to radicalize and collectively organize from within. During that time, wherever the US military established its forces, an equal or greater counter-force operated through GI coffee shops, antiwar newspapers, or on-base soldier unions. The ability for dissent to travel to every corner of the United States Empire created a situation of rebellion that spiraled out of control, providing soldiers the opportunity for outright combat refusal and a break down of military bearing.

Today’s military empire is no different, and neither are its soldiers. As the Occupation of Iraq becomes more of a bloodbath and controversy, so too will the radicalization of GIs become more common and prevalent. The only solution to this war, much like the War in Vietnam, will be for the soldiers to organize against it, and end the war from within.

We can help create the conditions for open rebellion in the military, but only if we are determined to reach out to active duty soldiers not only within our own borders, but in other countries as well. The fuse is set for GI resistance across the globe, all it needs is the spark of support from a nurturing antiwar movement at home to ignite this struggle, and bring the war machine to its knees.

--
posted by Jeff Englehart
aka: heckle
Iraq Veterans Against the War
www.ivaw.org

2007-07-22T17:59:00.002-04:00

Back In The Trenches: Reflections of American soldier outreach in Germany, May 2007
By Jeff Englehart
Iraq Veterans Against the War
www.ivaw.org

To anyone paying attention, it is now clear that the Iraqi Occupation is an American travesty and a tumultuous whirlwind of violence that rages horribly out of control. Even the American media, typically known to embellish pretentious accounts of success in Iraq, has been singing a different tune. A tune that suggests that the US has found itself in a situation where victory in Iraq seems nil, and that a continued military presence there will only bring about more civilian death, destruction, and scores more of American soldiers fruitlessly killed for oil and empire.

Political pundits, even in the most conservatively hawkish tones, now speak openly in doubt of our current strategy in Iraq. Former Generals publicly accuse the President of horrible mismanagement of the war while speaking candidly for policy change. Presidential candidates denounce the Bush administration for purposely misleading the country into war and promise an immediate withdrawal if elected in 2008. Everyone with something to gain in DC is pimping the war for their own political agendas, and to speak openly against the war has never been so popular.

However, to the soldier in Iraq who sees a country gone to hell and with the chances for personal survival greatly decreasing with each ambush and roadside bomb, all this antiwar rhetoric back home is all talk and no show.

Ironically, as the depth and extent of action against the war is usually limited only to public discussion and debate, the soldier brave enough to speak out against the war finds her/his voice routinely silenced and ignored. To keep the truth of the war conveniently hidden from the public mind, a concerned military silences the soldier’s voice through draconian punishments meant to scare dissident thought into submission. While in mainstream American discourse talking heads and antiwar “activists” arrogantly ignore the soldier’s voice, as if such testament may bring about a truth far too ugly for most citizens to confront on the level.

This is why in May, after being invited to Germany to participate in outreach to active duty Army soldiers, I decided to jump at the opportunity. I felt that such a prospect would be beneficial in better understanding the mentality of antiwar soldiers at this stage of the war. In addition, as a member of Iraq Veterans Against the War (IVAW), it would be a huge step to represent IVAW in the European theater and hopefully incite awareness of the soldiers’ and veterans’ movement to end the Iraq War immediately. But most intriguing to me was the hope to actually meet soldiers stationed far away from home, who would soon be headed to yet another mission in Iraq. I felt that I understood their situation completely. Three years ago, I too was in their situation. While stationed in Germany for almost four years, the Army had deployed me to Kosovo for nine months in 2003, only then to stop-loss me in 2004 and send me to Iraq for one year during Operation Iraqi Freedom II. This trip to Germany, for me, was not to be for grandiose sightseeing tours to medieval castles. Far from it, my intentions overseas was to meet with these soldiers and show them that there were dedicated veteran-activists back home who cared about their plight. Most importantly, the key stratagem in going overseas was to help provide active duty soldiers the insight and tools needed to organize from within the war machine to end the occupation of Iraq. Within one week of getting the call, myself and three other members from IVAW were boarding a plane, anxious and excited, headed back to a turbulent chapter of my life to meet with soldiers and help them organize.

Our first stop off the plane was a quaint barbeque in the town of Ansbach. Located about 25 miles southwest of Nuremberg, the town of Ansbach has a German population of around 50,000 and is also home to the 12 Combat Aviation Brigade, part of the famous V Corp, stationed just outside of town on the post Storck Barracks. The German groups who invited us there, the Ansbach Peace Coalition and the Stop The War Brigade, welcomed us with German schnitzels and good Franconian wheat beers. During our backyard dinner, we discussed the politics of the war in Iraq, Germany’s complicity in supporting the war, and how the US installation in Ansbach affected the local community. We soon discovered that much like in America, Ansbach residents critical of the war were accused of “anti-Americanism” and hindering foreign relations with the United States. In reality, the Ansbach Peace Coalition was uncomfortable with their government’s infraction of Article 26 of the German constitution, which stated that no war of aggression should ever be declared by the state of Germany, nor shall it participate in such wars by lending assistance from German soil. America’s blatant use of its German bases to deploy troops and equipment to Iraq and Afghanistan, and the German government’s willful indifference to such, is a direct contradiction to the People’s Constitution. Exacerbating the problems further was the US military’s intentions to expand Storck Barracks onto a nature preserve protected under German law. This aspect of the US’s presence in Ansbach was widely unpopular amongst its residents. As we talked, I glanced around the conversation to observe the members of the Ansbach Peace Coalition. None of them appeared hostile in any way, but rather looked much like any peaceful gathering of families and neighbors one may encounter on a Sunday evening in any suburb in America.

“Funny,” I said aloud, “None of you look like anti-American zealots or terrorists one may expect to find lurking in the shadows, holding bombs and sneaking through some dark alleyway.”

“Oh no! Certainly not,” a stoic and calm Boris, from the Ansbach Peace Coalition retorted, “In my home town of Ansbach, I have met many, many good Americans over the years. Many have been soldiers. I know they are but instruments of a democracy from their own home. My heart aches to know the pain they go through in Iraq. I want them to live. I want Iraqis to live. I want your politicians to end the war now!”

After a quiet puff on his cigarette Boris added, “You know, Americans are always welcomed in Deutschland. Just please, Please! Leave your weapons at home.”

It all made perfect sense to me.

The following night, our IVAW contingent went to downtown Ansbach to check out the local soldier-watering hole. The name of the bar was The Gazebo. Fitting, I thought, as in my experience in the Army, gazebos were the perfect place to take a smoke break, bullshit with your battle-buddies, and break up the monotony of slaving away in the motor pool. As we entered, the ambiance of the establishment hit me like a ton of bricks. Indeed, The Gazebo was what we called in Germany a “Joe bar.” A Friday night, soldiers from wall to wall, sporting high’n tights, flirting with German girls and just generally drinking to forget. Some things never change.

The feeling in there was tense. None of the soldiers I glanced over seemed genuinely happy with their current state of affairs. I felt nervous, like we were being watched. Sure enough, an IVAW companion spoke into my ear that we were definitely out of place. Many of the soldiers studied our movements, looking us up head to toe. We must have certainly stood out as foreign elements as our shaggy hair, beards, and counter-culture clothing attire conflicted greatly with our conservative surroundings. With IVAW literature hidden in our backpacks, we decided it was at first best to grab a pool cue and attempt to fit in.

At length, we eventually engaged in conversation with a few soldiers standing around the pool tables. One, a young Specialist door gunner, began talking about the war.

“You know, it’s fucked up man!”

“Yeah, what’s that?”

“Well, I just got back from Iraq, and here it is, just under a year later, and here we go again.”

“Whaddya do over there, anyways?”

“I’m a door gunner on a Blackhawk. I can’t even remember how many missions I did, I quit countin’ em. No point! They had us in the air all the goddamn time, doing all sorts of stupid missions. A lot of escorting brass. Funny shit, man! They would fly these mother fuckers from one green zone to another. Its not like we were droppin’ them off in the middle of Baghdad. Their time in a combat zone, in the fucking shit, was when they were flying over it, safe and sound! And then they have the balls to tell Rumsfeld and reporters that Iraqi stabilization is going according to plan, that we’re well on our way to winning this fucking war!

“Yeah, it’s fucked up, man,” said the door gunner, carelessly taking shots at the cue ball, “The press is only getting one side of the story over there, the General’s side. Fuck that! If reporters were to ask the grunt on the ground, Americans at home would be crying themselves to sleep every night. Iraq ain’t so pretty once you ask a soldier what he thinks about fighting for Freedom and Democracy!”

The Specialist continued his drunken tirade, “Yeah, this one time…oh man get this…this one time some stupid fucking Colonel gets off the bird at some FOB. Nothing new there. But this one time the dumbass gets off the chopper and leaves his fucking M-4! Just left it sitting there on the seat! So we get back, its late at night, I’m dog-tired, I’m in my room chillin’, when all of a sudden they tell us to get back on, some fucking Colonel forgot his weapon and we gotta go take it back to him!”

“Ha! Do ya’ think some General read him his article 15 for that?”

“What the fuck do you think, man? Hell no! So we land, and some lieutenant comes running out to meet me half way on the tarmac. So I got this here M-4 of his, I say, ‘Here you are, Sir, one gold-plated M-4 for the commander’. He looks at me, grabs this weapon, runs off saying nothing more than ‘Thanks, Specialist. The Colonel sure appreciates it.’ Thanks for what? Your ass is out here at 2:30 in the morning, just like me, on a top-secret mission to return some Colonel his rifle before the fucking Stars and Stripes finds out about it. You know what happens to me if I leave my M-9 just sittin’ around…field grade Article-15, man. I lose my rank, my pay, they probably pull me off the gun…its fucked man. The whole army, its all jacked up!”

At this point, I ask him what he thinks about the war.

“Its bullshit. All of it. Ain’t no use of being there except to line all of Bush’s buddies with billions and billions of dollars. Terrorism. Yeah, that’s why we’re there, alright…Our brand of terrorism. American terrorism. Hey man, whaddya think its called when you blast a neighborhood of civilians with bombs and 50 cals from the sky? Whaddy think its called when you rain hell-fire and brimstone from the sky, with just the push of a button?”

I answer, “Terrorism?”

“You’re fucking goddamned right.”

Eventually the door gunner went home. Said he was drunk and didn’t feel like chasing away his depression with booze until the early morning hours. But before he walked out, we handed him an Iraq Veterans Against the War pamphlet. He told us he was damned proud of our organization and what we stood for. He was glad we had decided to come all the way to Germany. He then said he was going to tape the pamphlet on his wall, above his bed. There it was, in bold three inch black lettering… “IRAQ VETERANS AGAINST THE WAR”. He said he hoped that his First Sergeant would come in one day and see it. It might have him doing “Hey you” details for a month, but he didn’t care.

“Fuck’em”, he said, “I don’t care about this bullshit and what they think about it anymore!”

Our conversation with the door gunner was an inspirational beginning to our journey, but The Gazebo would prove to be a tough venue in which to meet antiwar soldiers. One soldier gave us the cold shoulder, and told us that he didn’t want to hear our “commie bullshit.” In another instance, a couple of soldiers were open to talk about where we all had served and what jobs we did in the Army. However, when getting on the topic of where they stood on the Iraq war, they were much more hesitant. They audaciously told us that they had “been given orders not to talk to American activists that would be coming to town,” suggesting that press conferences we would be holding for the German press later that week tipped off their chain of command as to our presence in Ansbach. Finding conversations with soldiers and passing out IVAW literature eventually landed us right in the middle of a confrontation with Gazebo bouncers, as they crumpled and tore our flyers and physically shoved us out the door. The neanderthalic approach of the bar security almost erupted into a violent clash between them and us four disgruntled war vets, and certainly did not give the impression we hoped to put off to observant soldiers. The encounter left a bitter taste in my mouth, and immediately my suspicions pointed to the 12^th CAB’s chain of command. However, after smoking a cigarette and waiting for a cab, I realized that the owners of The Gazebo were capitalists pure and true. They probably supported the war effort more than any other business in Ansbach. A whole brigade of morose and bitter soldiers provided The Gazebo with thousands of euros in bar tabs, despite the inconvenience of weekly fistfights and tears in the beers. Money talks, and what proprietor of such a soulless enterprise would be ok with a bunch of “leftist-wackos” inside his establishment, assuaging his customers and turning them away from their hired-hit man profession that was bringing in so much profit. On a strictly capitalist-minded level, it made perfect sense.

The German peace groups were surprised to hear about the outburst. They had hoped that we could help to turn the place into an “antiwar coffee house” of sorts, eventually seeing The Gazebo evolve into a breeding ground for clandestine communication and dissent. But it was not to be. Not while the establishment provided soldiers with cheap booze, bad pop-music, and throes of floozies to hit on. It was just another Joe-bar, and would never likely provide the energy of antiwar subversion needed to motivate soldiers into organizing against the war. Not that the clientele there were incapable of questioning the war. On the contrary, our conversation with the door gunner left us with the impression that those were the standard sentiments within his unit. However, with a chain of command watching the joint and an ownership adamantly opposed to sober and thoughtful soldiers, The Gazebo was a place that would not likely take kindly to our presence again. Besides, the bouncer made damn sure we understood that we were never welcome back, shaking his ape-like fist in the air to confirm it.

With that in mind, we decided to alter our approach in meeting soldiers. We had plans on getting inside the military base later that week, but first we needed to test the waters a bit more. We needed to find a much more relaxed medium. Somewhere less tense, which encouraged a carefree and happy atmosphere. The following night we found exactly what we needed when happening across the annual Spring Festival.

German festivals are like the carnival that comes to your hometown. Good food, great beer, bumper cars and coin-toss, except that they smell better and you don’t feel as dirty or ripped off when you get in your car to leave. Once again, we didn’t show up for the fun and games. I knew from experience that soldiers flock to these events, perhaps for the entertainment, or maybe because the nostalgia reminds them of home. At any rate, we headed into the beer tents, IVAW literature in hand, hoping to find a pack of soldiers to speak with.

Sure enough, we came across a group of about a dozen American soldiers or so. There they were, drinking and laughing merrily. It brought back memories from my own experience in Germany, living life to the fullest before you go sacrifice it over in Iraq. This time we had no hesitations about talking to the soldiers, as the festival atmosphere seemed relaxed and far from scrutinized. We figured a blunt and direct introduction was in order. As one of the soldiers was walking beers-in-hand back to his buddies, I approached him with an IVAW flyer and asked,

“Hey man, are you an Iraq veteran against this war?”

He looked at me baffled, as though surprised at what I was actually saying to him in American English, “Well, uh, I’m not quite a veteran yet, but yeah, I’m against this fucking war!”

From there the dialogue flowed naturally. I told him that I was also stationed in Germany not more than two years ago, and had been deployed to Iraq during Operation Iraqi Freedom II. My IVAW companions and I showed him the pamphlets we had, told him that IVAW was a growing organization of Iraq War veterans committed to ending the illegal war of aggression and bringing all of our brothers and sisters home immediately.

He had no idea that IVAW even existed.

As the young soldier stared down at the IVAW pamphlet in his hand he exclaimed, “Oh man! Where the fuck have you guys been?! This is fucking awesome! Hey, if you want to talk to some guys that hate the army as much as you do, you should go talk to my buddies over there!”

He pointed in the direction of his friends behind me. As I turned around, I saw a whole group of them sitting at the end of a long wooden table. They were eyeing us over, looking to see what crazy asshole was holding up their friend with the beers.

We confidently strode over to the soldiers. They immediately started questions in our direction.

“Who are you guys?”

“You American?”

“What’s that you got in your hand?”

I spoke up, “Hey guys, I’m Jeff, I’m an Iraq war veteran from the States. These guys here are my friends, they too are veterans of this war. We’re here representing a group called Iraq Veterans Against the War. You should know about us. It could be in your best interests.”

I felt as though my introduction was somewhat arrogant and contrived. I can’t stand sounding like a businessman. So quickly, I added, “Fuck this war, man! We’re here to get to know the soldiers tied up in this shit. We’re here ‘cause we wanna help you.”

At that, we started handing out fliers. The first soldier we met was doing a good job of talking us up, “These guys were in Iraq while you were Saar’nt, the first time, 2004, right?”

The Sergeant replied, “Fuck yeah. We had it easier then. Haji’s didn’t really know an RPG from the hole in their ass. Now shit’s all fucked up. They can nail Kiowas with eyes closed now.”

I asked him where he was in 2004.

“Oh fuck man, I was just about everywhere. Baghdad, Tikrit, Balad, Falluja…”

That’s where the Sergeant trailed off. I asked him what he did over there. He told us he was an Eighty-eight Mike. A truck driver. He took a sip from his giant mug of beer, then continued with his story,

“It was pretty fucked up, man. Never knew what the fuck we were doing. They’d tell us, ‘OK, here’s your convoy, you’ll have escorts, you gotta git to Tikrit.’ But you don’t know what the hell you escortin’, and then it turns out you ain’t got no escort at all. You got some pouge attachment in ratty-ass humvees and only two of ‘em have crew-serves, and those two crew-serves are nothin’ but some old ass M-60’s, no 50 cals, hell, even we had a couple of 50 cals, but here we are, haulin’ ass down some crowed streets with a full load, hitting cars and runnin’ haji off the road, but again, we don’t know what the fuck we’re haulin’, till we get to Tikrit turns out the fucking trailers we were haulin’ were goddamned empty!”

“You’re kidding me, they had you hauling empty connexes?”

“Yep. Only to load up some other empty connexes and bring ‘em back to where we started.”

The large bodied Sergeant took a long pull off his beer and continued, in almost hushed tones, “You see, a lot of these guys here ain’t never been to Iraq. I’m an E-6, some of these guys here are my soldiers. I tell ‘em here, ‘Hey, I can drink with y’all and we can all have a good time, but once we git down there, if you think I’ll be fuckin’ around, you’re wrong. If you’re thinkin’ I won’t put a boot in your ass, you’re wrong.’ See, some of these guys, they’re still kids. But they won’t be when they come back, don’t matter how old or young they are.”

We told him we understood. When we all came back from Iraq, we had all changed. Most of our membership in IVAW still has issues, big and small, directly related from the war. We asked the sergeant why he continues with this shit,

“Why don’t you get the fuck out, man?”

“Look,” the Sergeant replied, “I really ain’t got no family back home. I’m single. I’ve been in Germany for almost six years now. I just re-enlisted myself. What the fuck am I gonna do if I go back? Naw, my place is here. I brought back all my soldiers from the last time I was there. I ain’t sayin’ I’m fucking Rambo or nothin’, I’m just sayin’ that I know what to expect down there. I know what ambushes look like before they happen. I have gut feelings when we come across IEDs. These guys don’t. I want them to come home, even if it means I don’t. That’s really all that matters to me, is gettin’ these guys home alive!”

“But what do you think about the war? Do you really want to keep going over there?”

“Well hell no I don’t! I know, I keep sayin’ ‘Fuck this shit’. I know it’s about oil. My guys know it’s about oil. Ain’t no illusions about this shit, man. Maybe when Bush gits outta office shit will be different, maybe it won’t. Maybe Americans really want that oil more than they ever thought they would. Maybe America is addicted to oil, maybe they just need it more than anything. Hell, I don’t know. But is it worth all these guys gittin’ killed over it? No. But until the means of the war outweighs the ends, until so much blood is on our hands that America drowns in it, then I don’t see no way out.”

I agreed with him on that. I asked the Sergeant, “No politician will end this war. So who do you think should?”

Another soldier listening in between sips of beer answered out of nowhere, “We should. We should all just refuse to fight in this shit. No fucking way could they give every single soldier in the Army a fucking court-marshal for refusing to fight. They ain’t got enough JAG’s to pull it off! Can’t keep going on forever anyways!”

The Sergeant didn’t seem to disagree, but he just silently shook his head as he sipped his beer.

“Take a look at this material here,” breaking the silence as I continued, “Again, we’re a growing organization of veterans who want to bring you guys home. Enough is enough! I can understand if you guys want to stay in the army, we’re not trying to tell you not to be in the army, and IVAW is NOT anti-soldiers, by the way. But these politicians, these crooks and war criminals, they’re putting you guys in bad situations, dangerous situations, both morally and physically. Think about it. We’re not asking you to go AWOL or nothing, that would be stupid. But at least look at these pamphlets, check us out on the internet, and help us out however you can, because we want to work with smart guys like you to shut this war down.”

At that, the group took the flyers. One soldier said, “Hey how many you got? I’ll pass them out everywhere.”

We advised him to be careful, in fact, suggested otherwise. We reminded him that as a soldier in the United States military, you have the right to have possession of one copy of printed material, but multiple copies suggests distribution, and could land you facing UCMJ charges.

“Oh I know, man,” the soldier answered, “but fuck ‘em. What are they gonna do, send me to Iraq? Again?! Fuck ‘em. I ain’t gonna get caught anyways. All I want is to give ‘em to some friends of ours.”

With that, we handed him a whole bundle of IVAW pamphlets. I asked the Sergeant if he was OK with it.

“Yeah, I ain’t got no problems with it. Just don’t tell anyone I OK’d it. In fact, when you do get caught, Wendell, I wasn’t even here, got it?”

“Roger, Saarn’t.”

“And hey,” the Sergeant told me, holding out his hand, “Give me a couple, too.”

A few days had gone by after our encounter at the Spring Festival. We had to take care of the usual formalities associated with the work of stopping an illegal war of aggression, greed, and empire. We were escorted to meetings with German political parties sympathetic to our work. We attended informal get-togethers with reporters, and were present at drawn-out and overly dramatic press conferences. It was all designed to build up interest and esteem in the community for a major protest planned on the last day of our stay in Germany, right outside the front gates of Storck Barracks.

The day before the protest was to occur, our IVAW contingent got together in a private meeting and planned out the bloody details on how to get on to the Army post. Once there, we planned to pass out IVAW literature while our IVAW ally Adam Kokesh read the “Ansbach Appeal for Peace,” as well as an invitation for all soldiers to attend the protest outside of their barracks. The planned the action to go down during the lunchtime hours in the Army DFAC, where we hoped to reach as many soldiers in one sitting as possible.

To this day, I still do not personally know what transpired inside that base. I was denied access onto the installation despite my many pleas to utilize--as a veteran of this great country America--their on-base PX facilities. While I waited outside the gate in a borrowed, unmarked car, the other three comrades of mine made it inside. Apparently, their “still valid” military ID’s worked somehow. What I do know is that Adam read the statement while the other two filmed it and passed out IVAW literature. They were then chased off base by some sell-out Sergeant First Class. One from our contingent barely retrieved his passport from the gate security, just before the Sergeant First Class ran up to catch him. In the white flash and heat of the moment, the only thing I remember seeing in our hasty retreat was the Sergeant First Class, with rent-a-pig security guards in tow, all standing in front of the post, shaking their fists in anger as we sped away in our small Opel hatchback.

(For more information about our Army post infiltration go to: Sergeant Kokesh Goes To Washington at http://kokesh.blogspot.com/2007_05_01_archive.html, scroll down to May 17, 2007. Also check out http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JtNEo4SMlIg for live video footage of the action.)

At last, the time had come for the demonstration in front of the 12^th CAB Storck Barracks. The Ansbach Peace
Coalition came in full regalia, brandishing cardboard signs, banners, and a PA system that would help in addressing the soldiers locked away inside their protected little Army world. As our IVAW contingent arrived on scene, members of the Peace Coalition met us with German police officers. We were told that as guests in Germany, we would have the freedom of speech and assembly as guaranteed to all German citizens. Nevertheless, there were exceptions. We were warned that we would be arrested on site if we attempted to incite a riot or if we used vulgar language and obscenities.

All of this seemed in good order to me, until the officer then added, “Ah und one more z’ing. Ze miltaree alzo rekwested z’at wee arrest you eef any of zou eincourage Amerikan soldats to go a’vol or to dezzert.”

An IVAW ally

of ours asked, “Ok, but will we be arrested if we encourage them to go AWOL?”

To which the police officer curtly replied, “Z’hat ist up to ze armee’s dizkretion.”

Mechanically I turned my attention towards the front gate, where a group of uniforms began to form. As if to compliment the police officer’s ominous warning, standing stoically in front of MPs and rent-a-cops was none other than the brigade Command Sergeant Major. He never said a word, nor did anyone even think to talk to him. With eyes that would make a Private soil his fatigues, the CSM stared blazingly at us from across the street, waiting in prone to strike us down. Command Sergeant Major is a rank that even most high-ranking officers will not dare to confront. Years upon years of taking the Army’s abuse with a smile and a thank you are what set aside common people from Command Sergeant Majors, and this one couldn’t wait to chew our heads off. His face read Patriot, and his collar screamed Uncompromised Loyalty. I had no control over the sense of caution that swept over me. I knew instinctively that we would have to be smart about what we said, for it was coldly obvious from the lines drawn on his brow that the CSM would be looking for any reason he desired to ensure that we would all be spending the night in a German jail cell.

In retrospect, I know now that the static currents of animosity and machismo emitting from the front gate that day was a good sign. It was proof that, more than anything, the US Army in Germany was frightened at the potential of their own soldiers deserting and vanishing away into a foreign country. Our mere presence as veterans--as survivors and witnesses--to the unforgivable crimes committed in Iraq was a direct threat to their twisted world of silence, subjugation, and manipulation. We stood openly proud in Absolute Opposition to the war and the Army’s compliance to it. Our group of four Iraq Veterans Against the War came all the way to the Army’s doorstep in Germany to speak candidly with our fellow brother and sister soldiers. The lines were drawn, and nothing they could do would stop us. And to add insult to injury, we would be speaking sedition right under the nose of their pretentious authority. The Army, much like any other institution of rule and order, fears greatly what it cannot defeat or control.

Indeed, the army was scared, and rightfully so. Their means of coercion, conformity, and fear that normally holds together their good order and discipline could soon begin to unravel at the seams. If history repeats itself, much like it always does, then it seems only rational that when corrupt and conniving politicians declare illegal and immoral wars for profit and power, the time will come when a military’s morale will snap and well-conditioned, obedient soldiers will begin to think individually of their role in the madness. Soldiers are not, and never have been, machines that execute orders unconditionally. On the contrary, they are human beings. And historically, when soldiers are forced into a war of oppression, of killing the innocent, of plunder, rape and murder, eventually the moment comes when soldiers will refuse the mission, will refuse the fight, and sometimes even point their rifles the other way.

Could the simple testimony of a hardened veteran spark the revolution that I had dreamed of during so many grueling nights in Iraq? Was it possible? Could it all start right here, right now?

With hopeful fantasies floating through my head, I decided that it would not be so bad spending a night in jail, let alone an eternity. When my turn came to speak to the soldiers behind the barbed wire fence, I took the microphone with trembling, white-knuckled hands, but spoke with a voice that threw all caution to the wind…

“Thank you for showing up to this little party we have here. Good afternoon Germany. Good afternoon Sergeant Major! And to all you soldiers over the wire there, hangin’ out the window of your barracks rooms, an especially big hello to all of you.

“My name is Jeff Englehart. I was a Cavalry Scout with the Big Red One, Third Brigade, out of Vilseck, Germany. Listen, I got out of the Army back in May 2005, but not before Rumsfeld stop-lossed me and all my buddies and sent our asses to Baquba, Iraq in 2004. Some of you know that year. Operation Iraqi Freedom II, the year I like to point out that, if there was any heart or mind in Iraq worth winning, well, we lost completely during that mission. Whether it was the Battle of Najaf, or Falluja, or Ramadi, or Sammara, or a bogus handover of sovereignty, or a bullshit election, or a torture scandal at Abu Gharib…Yeah, we were all pretty busy that year, and America lost any integrity it once had while we were at it.

“I came all the way over here from the United States on a mission of Blind Faith. I wanted to meet active duty soldiers here. I wanted to talk to them, because I knew if anyone would feed me some truth about this war, to be around straight talk again, like the good ol’ days when I was in, it would be you soldiers here.

“Some of you may wonder why I came here to do this. Yeah, I’ve met with active duty back home in the States, but it doesn’t compare to this. I remember when I was a soldier here in Germany. Me and my buddies were always in the field, always training to go to Iraq. I know what its like to be so far away from home and how isolated you all may feel right now before you go to Iraq. I know it feels awful lonely being in this situation, and you may be hearing that America supports you in your endeavors, but I know that you know that America is not at war…America’s soldiers are at war…America is at the mall!

“I’m here to say what you cannot say yourselves. I’m here in solidarity with you guys, headed to Iraq only three months from now. I would have loved to be in an antiwar protest outside my barracks, standing up against something I didn’t believe in. I guess that’s kind of my blind faith, what I’m doing here. I’m just trying to do it right this time around.

“I don’t see any soldiers over here, on our side of the wire, standing with us to protest this Occupation of Iraq. That’s ok. I understand that MP’s are blocking the gate. I can see your Sergeant Major leading the pack to silence us and prevent you all from hearing the truth.

“Your chain of command probably told you a little bit about us. No doubt they were lying to you. You see, we’re from an organization back home called Iraq Veterans Against the War. Sometimes crazy and frightened people claim that we are anti-American. Nothing is further from the truth.

“We’re antiwar.

“We’re anti-having our brothers and sisters dying needlessly for a war of empire and oil.

“We’re anti-soldiers coming home from this horrible debacle only to be denied health care from an ungrateful and reprehensible government.

“We’re anti-having our country’s good name and reputation throughout the world being smeared and disgraced by greedy and malicious war criminals in Washington, D.C.

“We’re anti-the death of scores of thousands of innocent Iraqis being butchered in this senseless war, in our name nonetheless.

“So while some may claim that we’re anti-American, let me assure you, there’s a BIG difference between what they say, and what we as veterans of this horrible war stand for.

“Its true. Your chain of command is lying to you. You know this! The lies start in the Oval Office and they landslide all the way down to you in Iraq. What do you expect? Bullshit rolls down hill.

“But President Bush didn’t just lie to you; he’s lied to and betrayed an entire country of Americans, over and over, to justify his bloody wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.

“Where was the Iraq-Sadaam connection to 9-11 that put us in Iraq in 2003?

“Where are these mysterious Weapons of Mass Destruction that we were undoubtedly supposed to find in Iraq, the WMD that were never there, just figments of a tyrant’s imagination?

“Where is this democracy that we supposedly…benevolently…gave to an Iraq suppressed under a US occupation? Where is the freedom we gave to an Iraq horribly oppressed by a military police state and corrupt puppet government made up from murderers, gangsters, militia heads, and sell-outs? Where is the prosperous future we promised an Iraq torn to shreds by our ‘Divide and Conquer’ imperial strategy, creating civil war and ethnic cleaning rarely seen of this magnitude in Mesopotamia?

“Where is the ‘Support for the Troops’ that this criminal administration boasts over and over to a placated American populace? Does Bush consider it ‘Supporting the Troops’ by sending you to a strategically and morally failed military adventure in Iraq? Does he really ‘Support the Troops’ by sending the most wealthy and powerful army in the world to a guerrilla war with no body armor, no vehicle armor, and in many cases, no drinkable water? Was Rumsfeld ‘Supporting our Troops’ when he indignantly told a National Guard in Kuwait that ‘You go with the army you have, not the army you want’?

“The hypocrisy doesn’t stop there, my friends. When you make a sacrifice to go and fight in Iraq, a concept most other Americans would never dare consider, for the ideals of Freedom, Justice, and Liberty for all, does it not leave a bitter taste in your mouth when you realize that you have been used and deceived?

“Why is it that mercenary killers in the Blackwater Corporation get paid ten times more than you do, to do the same exact job, but with much better equipment, much cushier living conditions, and with more time off?

“Why is it that Bush and his cabal of criminal goons are lining their pockets with billions of dollars to destroy Iraq, to rebuild Iraq, to Privatize Iraq, and to carve out future oil profits for Exxon, Shell, and BP? And all the while doing it in blood of your efforts?

“Why are you fighting and dying over there for no better reason to make our ruling elite trillions of dollars, and giving you nothing more than a broken home, piss-poor veteran benefits, and a real bad case of PTSD?

“And why are you in Iraq combating freedom fighters when you could be back at home battling the real terrorists of the Minutemen, the KKK, and an ultra-right wing group of criminal thugs known as neoconservative Republicans, who are dismantling the very freedoms and liberties that you signed an oath to protect?

“After World War II, when the Allied Forces defeated Nazi Germany, a war crimes tribunal was held in Nuremberg whereas Nazi commanders were tried and summarily executed for the crimes they committed against humanity. The commanders’ excuse was that they were ‘Just following orders.’ But their excuses were no refuge from the horrible truth of their actions. After being found guilty for crimes against humanity, their executions were but just a sliver of justice done for the enormous amount of death, destruction, and systematic murder wrought on the people of Europe.

“So when the Democratic Party fails miserably in bringing George Bush to justice in impeaching him, I lose faith in their brand of ‘Democracy’ we are forced to accept in this country.

“Besides, impeachment, or merely firing Bush for what he has done, would be by all standards not doing justice to all those killed by his hand.

“And because tyrants in the Bush Administration are guilty beyond all recognition of Crimes Against Humanity and of High Treason as dictated by our American Constitution…

“…true justice would be done if George Bush, Dick Cheney and Donald Rumsfeld were to be tried, convicted, and hanged for their crimes against the world.

“Of course, such an outcome of this charade would be rationally viewed as impossible.

“Indeed, the biggest hypocrisy of all is the government in which you are fighting for.

“Which is why I have come here today to remind you all of your soldier’s duty to America.

“When you signed that oath to join the United States military, you made a promise to defend the United States Constitution from ‘All enemies, both foreign and domestic’.

“Politicians are flawed, and are inherently prone to corruption. Men of power have historically betrayed their fellow citizens out of greed, prestige, and lust for power.

“Our politicians are no different.

“Therefore, it is your duty as protectors of the American way of life to defend our facets of democracy from oppressors who wish to destroy it, even if those oppressors happen to be American, or are in your chain of command.

“And remember, you are an American before you are a soldier. You have an obligation as an American to protect and defend our ideals of liberty and justice, be it solider or civilian. Nothing is more patriotic than ensuring that your country is safe from any attempt to destroy the fabric of our free society.”

At this point, I was briefly interrupted in my tirade when the German M.C. whispered in my ear that police officers were beginning to surround the speaker’s platform. I took a momentary pause to look the situation over. Sure enough, cops were beginning to form around us, some even speaking privately to my IVAW companions. I wondered to myself if something I said had triggered them to arrest us. Perhaps I was once again speaking too long, too much, or had spoken too many abrasive statements against the government. Then I remembered the stern warning from the police officer not to encourage desertion. Across the fence, confined within the protection of their army base, I could see soldiers still perched in the windowsills of their barracks rooms. Our event here had garnered quite a crowd of soldiers, even if they were not directly within our vicinity. With that in mind, I decided to push the envelope in an alternate direction, one that I hoped the Army would hate to hear, but most likely would not be expecting…

“Again, I can see all you guys hangin’ out in your windows, listening to all this bullshit I’m saying. You may agree with it, or not. But the way I see it, it’s the truth. The war is wrong on all standards, no matter how you look at it, and anyone who says that we’re doing good things over there, that we’re giving them democracy, or fighting the terrorists over there instead of at home is either having a hard time facing reality or is horribly brainwashed.

“But the worst reality to confront is the realization that we do not live in a true democracy, that the checks and balances of our system do not work, and that when problems occur in our society, we as citizens could ever vote out the problem and collectively right the wrongs.

“If that were the case, the overwhelming majority of Americans opposed to this war would have brought you home by now. Unfortunately, that is not the case anymore.

“We live in a capitalist feudalism where the citizens are merely considered consumer cattle and are allowed no true decisions or power to effect change in their society.

“Our freedoms in America are strictly limited to only The Freedom to Consume.

“We live in a one party system, where there is NO difference between the two political choices you get to vote for; there is NO political difference between Republicans and Democrats. Both parties behave as puppets to a profit-driven, power mongering system of greed, gluttony, and acquisition.

“And as it stands, you cannot put faith in one party keeping another in check. No! The Democrats, trusted in America to pull you guys out of Iraq, have exactly as much to gain, as well as to lose, by staying in Iraq!

“So to think that by staying in, waiting it out, and hoping to survive until it’s all over so you can keep your career in the Army, is ultimately suicidal.

“I know, and have heard it many times from many soldiers, that you guys don’t want to go over there again. For some of you, this will be your first deployment to Iraq. Good luck. For the rest of you who’ve been there a couple of times or more, you know as well as I do that your number is up eventually.

“Look at the way that they use soldiers as bargaining chips for the Presidential elections in 2008. That’s all you mean to the politicians in D.C., just another tool in the absurdly maniacal game of power-politics in their twisted world of reality. Let me ask you this, how many soldiers will die, how many of YOU will die, until November 2008, when they can decide, at their convenience, whether or not to pull you guys out.

“American soldiers deserve better than this. You put your life on the line for us back at home, and this is how the system treats you. You are disposable to them. The loss of your lives, the pain and grieving your families will endure, is inconsequential to them.

“They are not human. They forgot the meaning of life. They only know greed and death. They thrive off pain and suffering, and they won’t even bat an eye to the destruction at their hands. They don’t care about you. They are America’s ruling elite, and you are just another social security number.

“And ultimately, you will be just another name on another wall commemorating yet another war of profit and empire.

“Check this out, your Sergeant Major out here told us that if we, the Iraq Veterans Against the War, encouraged you all to desert or go AWOL from your obligations as soldiers in this illegal war, he would have us arrested.

“That’s what your chain of command is most afraid of. Without you, they have no war. No more glory. No more combat patches to go around. Ha! Can you imagine what would happen if the whole Army didn’t show up for formation tomorrow?!

“But we are NOT here, at least officially, to encourage you all to desert from the army. Hell no! On the contrary, we would rather see all of you organize from within, to put a block on your own death sentence, to bring this war machine down!

“No amount of civilian dissent and protest will ever convince these politicians to put an end to this war. And in the event of this war’s conclusion, they will only find another reason to start another war, be it three years from now or thirty!

“What I’m sayin’ is that you cannot expect the course of this war to change. It will only get more deadly, more bloody, longer, and worse. Likewise, you’ll never see any politician in D.C. completely pull any of you out immediately.

“Its up to you, the gears within the machine, to stop this war where it starts, at the tip of your guns.

“You all need to organize! If you want to live, organize! If you want to stop going to Iraq, organize! Because no one is going to do it for you.

“Organize little, organize big, every effort counts. Talk to your battle buddies about the war. Figure out who’s to blame for putting you in this fucked up situation. Write flyers! Write antiwar magazines! Write on the internet! Distribute the information! Set up meetings off base! Meet with German activists, write up a plan of attack! Strike the war machine where it hurts, the jugular of its own hypocrisy and lies!

“The United States military is made up of some of the finest and most intelligent men and women in the world. We have a long tradition of hard work and ingenuity. We represent some of the finest and most altruistic of human endeavors. Not long ago, we were seen the world over as the harbingers of freedom and liberty, and our values were respected and admired immensely.

“Its time we put an end to the madness and brutality of our occupation in Iraq. Our government’s policies of imperialism, war, destruction, and of brutal oppressions in third world countries completely contradict the American values we were born into. If an oligarchy of corrupt politicians cannot see the error of their ways, then it is up to us, as soldiers and veterans of this horrible war, to organize and force them to own up. True patriots follow the values of freedom that America should represent, not the orders of gangsters and crooks.”

With adrenaline coursing through my veins from the most confrontational stance I had ever taken against the Army in my life, I handed the microphone back to the M.C. and resumed my place in the protest under a shady spot provided by a small sapling tree. My nerves felt on edge from the encounter, and I needed to sit down and silently collect my thoughts. The protest concluded while I sat by myself, the other IVAW members brilliantly denouncing the war over the P.A. The threat of arrest from the German police slowly subsided, and members from the Ansbach Peace Coalition seemed gleefully pleased with the outcome of their protest at the base. But while I sat in solitude at the outer fringe of the crowd, I became suddenly concerned that our words as peaceniks and antiwar veterans perhaps may have fallen on deaf ears. I wondered greatly if what we said would have any impact on the soldiers/veterans movement. Would our plea for organized resistance work as well as it had in our tumultuous American past, from Haymarket to the fall of Saigon? Life in these ominous times always seems at the point of collapse. With the war in Iraq raging furiously everyday, a war with Iran forebodingly over the next horizon, and an administration in Washington stubbornly obsessed with their disastrous path, no time for a massive resistance was better. Would a complacent American populous and a suppressed military enlistment respond to a call to arms? Only time of course, would tell.

****

The protest outside Storck Barracks that day concluded our stay in Germany. The following day, as we were waiting at the Frankfurt airport for our departure flight to the United States, an IVAW companion decided to kill some time by checking his email in an internet café located in the terminal. Shocked with enthusiasm, our cohort-in-thoughtcrime insisted that I immediately read an email, sent from a solider who was present at the demonstration at Storck Barracks that day. His message was short, but very inspirational…

“To the Iraq vets against the war,

I was in the barracks yesterday when you had your protest against the war. You guys are doing a good thing. Me and some friends were listening to your speeches and we couldn’t agree more. You’re also right that its completely fucked up, that guys in Blackwater make ten times as much as we do to do the same job. It’s bullshit. As soldiers, we don’t get any respect for what we do.

I know that there are protests in America all the time. Before I was stationed out here, I knew they were happening close by but I didn’t care too much about it. I thought they were ungrateful for the sacrifice American soldiers are making over there, like they didn’t appreciate us or what we do. Now I know I was wrong. After I got back from Iraq, I really felt like we were screwed over by these politicians that have no clue what they’re doing. You’re right, they don’t care about us at all. We could get blown up tomorrow, and they wouldn’t give a fuck. When I get out of here I’m going to start going to protests back stateside. We have to end this war!

I also heard about you guys sneaking on post to read your statement in the chow hall. I wasn’t in the chow hall when you read it, but you should know that it was fucking awesome! A lot of my friends were there, and they told me all about it. You really pissed off our sergeants! Its great that you were there. The pamphlets you handed out are really getting around. I think a lot of guys are reading them. And I know a lot of guys really agree with what you said.

Well, I just wanted to let you know that you guys are doing a good thing. Please keep it up! And tell your buddies back home, there are a lot of pissed off soldiers over here!

Peace!

Soldier X

PS. If you guys ever wanna come back to Ansbach and need to get back onto post, get ahold of me. I have a key to the back gate and could let you in!”

The email was touching. All the doubts I had after giving my speech the day before evaporated like a fog being lifted from my eyes. If only just this one soldier got it, and would at least begin to start questioning the war, then the protest was not a lost cause. Far from it, from the tone of this soldier’s email, it sounded as if the sentiments expressed were common across the board. No longer did I feel any reservations about speaking out to soldiers. I knew intrinsically that the young Americans caught in the deadly web of Iraq know better than any vapid media mouthpiece or two-faced politician just how lost the war really is.

SHUT YOUR MOUTH AND DO WHAT YOU'RE TOLD!

2007-05-05T15:23:00.000-04:00

When Heretic and I got busted for this blog while we were in Iraq, they said the same shit then as what they're saying now to justify ending the war blog culture....

That it is a breach of operational security, that it only helps the enemy by lending encouragement, that it paints the picture that troop morale is low.

Same old shit as in any imperial war. Keep military adventures as far away from the plebeians as possible.

Unlike other war bloggers, we came out very fortunate. Our chain of command's threats of court-marshal proved to be futile. As was later confirmed by Military Intelligence and C.I.D., not once did we ever technically break OPSEC.

However, after much brow-beating and ass-chewings, we were told that we were not allowed to harbor opinions negitave of the war, the government, and especially the president.

In short, we were told to stop writing. Our voice, the soldier's voice, was put under by a makeshift gag order. Overnight we became silenced and censored.

As far as why they choose to silence the soldier's voice, it seems pretty clear to me. With elections starting to heat up, this one party government doesn't want the voting public to think that a rising tide of pissed off soldiers exists.

If every blogger was actually enjoying him/herself in Iraq, and letting the world know how great we're doing over there, perhaps this wouldn't be an issue.

But what the military hates more than anything in the world is a soldier that thinks for him/herself and makes his/her voice heard, especially when that voice is telling the truth.

It was an average soldier who blew the whistle on the tortures and inhumanity at Abu Gharib.

It was an average soldier who pointed his finger right back at Rumsfeld and asked, "When will we get armor for our trucks?!"

It was a group of average soldiers who refused a suicide mission to deliver tainted fuel into a combat zone with no crew-served weapons or ammunition to defend themselves with, and no armor to protect them whatsoever.

It was an average soldier who publicly interrupted his Colonel saying, "No sir, America is not at war. Its soldiers are at war. America is at the mall!"

To assume that a soldier will blindly follow along in the wake of criminality of an illegal and bloody occupation does not give enough credit to the conscious of the human mind.

To think that silencing a soldier's voice to hide the truth will help us win this war is absolutely ludicrous!

This is about PR spin. Its about convincing America that nothing is wrong. Bush's dumb-ass is still trying to convince us that his "brilliant" troop surge will work, even though it was nothing more than smoke and mirrors to begin with.

"Jest hold on der, Amurica. You's aul wait en see. This here troop seeerge is gar-aun-teeed! Ain't no sense in fussin' and fightin'. God'll see us through this! Amurica complains too damn much, can't see the bigger picture. We have no choice but to win in Iraq. Duncha know? Terrurist wanna kill us cuz they hate our freedumb!!"

As if Bush had any credibility left, imagine what a sudden increase in antiwar blogs will do to him. I can see why he's nervous. Had he actually ever been in a war, ever really been in the military, he'd know that some veterans are fucking crazy, pissed off and know how to shoot a gun. If I were responsible for starting an endless war, I'd be scared, too.

-----

I am incredibly dismayed with this sudden turn of events. Blogging was the only thing that kept me going in Iraq. I felt then, as I do now, that the American public deserves to know the truth about what's going on.

Further, if this new policy stretches into prohibiting emails as well, try explaining that to a soldier's wife, or husband, or parents, or children. We live in modern times, and as such this government needs to come to terms that the military family community depends on emails for instant reports from their loved ones.

I feel really bad for soldiers in Iraq right now. How much are we willing to isolate them, especially when most soldiers think Americans, despite their stupid yellow ribbons of "support", really don't give a fuck about what's going on outside of their pretentious lives anyways?

To the soldiers in Iraq, I can only hope that they don't let these very Anti-democratic assholes silence their voice. They are still citizens of this country. Each and every one of them has a mind of her/his own. What good is the 1st Amendment that they are fighting and dying for if they can't even use it themselves?

This government can't hide the truth forever. The blood and gore, so conveniently disguised and filtered through biased media, is still on our hands regardless how much we try to forget about it.

The Pentagon may like to think that its problems are solved by silencing the soldier's voice, but its not. It only serves as aggravation to an already bigger problem. Every soldier has a story to tell. And when the soldier returns home from this disgusting war, that is when we as a country will all be forced to listen. Whether we like it or not.

posted by Heckle

Who's Sacrifice?

2007-04-13T15:59:00.000-04:00

Who here in America, the overly privileged and placated country that it is, would be willing to make a sacrifice for something as disgusting and immoral as a criminal war?

What American is willing to put his or her life on the line by fighting in this War on Terror in Afghanistan or Iraq?

As an American, would you be willing to watch your son or daughter go fight in this illegal occupation of Iraq and return home in a straight jacket, or worse, a flag-draped coffin?

As a citizen of this imperial nation, are you ready, if need be, to have your draft number called and report for service as a hit man for Uncle Scam's corporate Empire?

What sacrifice are you prepared to make for this?!

Are you ready to answer these questions?

What if a soldier were to ask you?

As a veteran of the war in Iraq, I grow tired of watching the pain in a soldier's eyes after fighting in this war over and over only to see an ever-deteriorating situation in a country that never wanted an American forced democracy in the first place.

My heart aches when I meet the wife of a soldier in Iraq only to hear that the young couple hates the war, and wants out of the army, but could never otherwise afford the health care needed to provide for the birth of their expecting child.

It pains me to see that soldiers, only weeks away from returning home from Iraq, read on the internet about an involuntary 90 day extension pointlessly tying them to a losing war even longer.

And my patience grows thin to see Bush, the real enemy of freedom and democracy the world over, chuckle and grin when explaining the urgency of a winning strategy, the "troop surge", that is desperately needed to hold this sinking ship together for just a little longer. Just long enough to line his buddies pockets with another couple of trillion or so.

And as my patience is practically gone, I am tired of trying to explain to Americans why this war is lost, why it was lost from the start, and why we will be losers in the end.

If you refuse to see it by now then you're lost, too.

For years now there have been a sizable number of antiwar Iraq and Afghanistan veterans trying to express the reasons why the war on terror is a sham, and why its wrong that corrupt politicians are the only ones benefiting from the oppression, pain and misery that their wars inflict on the lower classes of the world.

And every time a veteran had something to say about it, that veteran was called a pinko, or unAmerican, or a traitor.

But every time that veteran proved to be right. That veteran has always been right. The great majority of Americans opposed to the war have only caught on in the last few months.

But that is all behind us now. My only question for anyone is, Are you willing to sacrifice for this war?

What is it worth to you? All your stupid fucking yellow ribbons mean nothing. A symbol of war and nationalist fervor. May as well be a swastika. What is your level of involvement in this war? Where is your support?

Again, who's blood are you willing to spill for the safety and security that these Republicans and these Democrats are promising you if you just shut up and let them do the talking?

And are your freedoms safe in the hands of warmongering and greedy idiots who not only want to keep young men and women dying in Iraq and Afghanistan, but now want to extend their empty promises and generous offers through a war with Iran?

Every time I hear a politician lie about this war, I don't scream or get mad, I just wish they would cut the bullshit out of it and just be honest with us… "Listen, America, we know that you know that you need that oil, and we're going to get it for you come hell or high water."

God Bless America.

But is it all worth it? Is it worth all the death and pain and misery our wars inflict on other human beings in the world? Is it worth a never ending war sucking our economy dry and leaving us with less resources to help our own poor and needy in America? Is it worth the infringement on civil rights both here and abroad?

Is it worth 3,300 dead sons and daughters of liberty? How many names will be carved on our wall?

Was it worth having a Louisiana National Guard in Iraq during Katrina?

Is it worth the USA Patriot Act?

Was it worth letting Bush nix posse comitatus?

How far will we let the madness continue?

What are the sacrifices we as a country are willing to make? Do not tell me this is necessary. Do not try to convince me this is about terrorism. I did not see any terrorists killed in Iraq. I saw women and children blown to pieces by car bombs. I saw dead farmers and dead shop-keepers killed by American munitions.

One man's terrorist is another man's freedom fighter.

Keep allowing these crooks, thieves and criminals to convince you that your life is in danger. Keep letting them coo you to sleep as you walk mindlessly consuming in this decadent and decaying shopping mall of America. Keep believing their lies, like every good American has since 1776.

We have a history of terrorism in this country. We support brutal dictators all over the world. We destroy any social movement or truly democratic awakening that dares to surface in Latin America. We arm war lords in Africa. We fund tyrants in the Middle East. We give the go-ahead to genocide in East Asia. We are solely responsible for the bloody occupation of Palestine. We are the big bully on the block, and when a sovereign nation of working class people stand up to us and take it to the streets, we call them terrorists.

The best way to end terrorism is to stop participating in it.

You will never convince me that we are right when we treat other human beings so utterly inhumane. I will never believe it, because I am a veteran of an illegal and immoral war, and I saw the immorality of it firsthand in Iraq.

And other soldiers are seeing it, too.

I heard a veteran once say that if everyone in America could see what we are doing to the Iraqi people, they would end the war tomorrow. Perhaps that veteran is right. After all. the only power that will stop this war is the power of the people.

Its up to you, America, to determine the costs and ask yourself a simple question,

"Is it worth it?"

And then go out and do something about it.

Because the soldiers who are fighting this never-ending war, and the veterans who cannot get the help they need coming home, and the military families who's tears are shed when a loved one will never return are the only ones making the sacrifices...

...And their patience is running thin.

posted by heckle

Where's the Love

2007-02-01T16:54:00.000-05:00

I have a firm belief in “knowing my enemy” so the other night I nestled in to my hole in the wall basement DC apartment to watch our courageous President “Bloody” George inform America on the “State of the Union.” As the comforting glow of the television hummed to life I sat through a couple of commercials in interest discovering what my neighbors are buying. I am always hypnotized by TV since I have almost completely cut myself off from the soul sucking broadcasted programming.

Staring affixed, the chamber comes into view as politicians find their seats gossiping and shaking hands. The commentators talk about what is likely to be said by the president and they seem interested in who is sitting where. Already there is talk about the 2008 presidential race. It seems clear that most of the people in the room are invested in their campaigns already. Morals and convictions are set to be compromised for the overall success in elections. Again the war will be used by both parties as a political chip and the lives of my fellow soldiers and innocent Iraqis will pay the price.

In walks the President. It takes some time for him to make it to his position. He begins by brown nosing the new Speaker of the House and has a lot of great things to say about the first woman to hold that title. I wonder if it is all lip service, after so many lies from our leader it is hard to believe anything he says. Then he dives into how the Dems and the Repubs have to work together to face difficult challenges and threatened that it is a defining hour and it is a matter of urgency that there is bi-partisan cooperation. This is new. Were did the “I am going to do what ever I want” Dubya go?

“The economy is on the move” Next we have talks about how the country is doing AWESOME economically and how everyone in America has a job, ten cars and a swimming pool. Not only are we all sitting pretty but it is going to get better. I had to look out my window for a quick glance of the homeless man curled into a ball across the street freezing in the winter night. Maybe Bush doesn’t consider him a part of this “economy on the move”? The homeless man is probably a war veteran, that might mean he isn’t even an American in the President’s eyes. Speaking of veterans, I am interested in hearing what George Bush says about us?

On and on he goes talking about these great new initiatives. It is almost as if he was just elected and he has been waiting to reveal these great projects that will fix all of our domestic problems. I was reminded of Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite “Vote for me and your wildest dreams will come true.” Maybe we will eliminate the National Debt in five years, and cut back on 20% of our gasoline usage, and give families tax breaks if they can’t afford health insurance. What about us veterans?

Ahhhh here we go, the war in the middle-east. More of the same, we have to win, fight terror, defeat evil, take the fight to the enemy, (a free history lesson) free people are not drawn into violent ideologies blah blah blah. Oh here is some news, “the American people didn’t vote for failure.” What do you call the 2000 and 2004 elections? Still nothing, just "Stay the Course More."

A basketball player, a local hero, wait wait,,,,,a soldier that was injured in Iraq. Close, but still nothing. Some more ramblings and encouragement, some boogie man stories about Iran and catastrophe in Iraq and theeeeeeeeen done.

Nope not once did the President utter the word “Veteran”. He spoke of increasing the military, sending more troops to Iraq and possibly taking harder measures against Iran, but forgot to mention that he cut veteran benefits. Why bring it up when it might call attention to the more than 22,000 wounded in action that this war has produced and the fact that the attacks on our military in Iraq and Afghanistan are increasing everyday? Why call attention to the fact that the escalation of troops in Iraq are the same troops that have just left and the troops still there that will have to be extended?

Why burden the public with the reality that it is “W” as the leader of this nation that is a failure and that in 2006 if we could have had a presidential election George W Bush would have been chased out of the White House with the worst land slide loss in history.

As our nation’s President it is obvious by the State of the Union address that he doesn’t stand by our nation’s veterans, which means he doesn’t stand by our troops. It has become clear as day that there are two sides.

You are either with the President or with the troops

the heretic

Additional Sacrifices

2007-01-08T16:21:00.000-05:00

Recently President George W. Bush stated that “difficult choices and additional sacrifices lie ahead.” As a combat veteran of Operation Iraqi Freedom, I take it extremely personal that our Commander and Chief casually speaks of sacrifice when it is not shared equally through out our country.

Many of the soldiers that I fought beside in the Middle-East have returned on multiple deployments to the combat zone, some of them totalling over three years of combined war experience. Zogby’s poll last year proved that only a quarter of the troops in Iraq are there on their first tour of duty, half of the current troops are on their second deployment and the remaining twenty-five percent have gone three times or more.

The same minority of Americans are paying the burden of the wars in Afghanistan and Iraq. Only one half of one percent of Americans serve in the US military today. That is the least amount in the last century. With so few in the Armed Forces and the demand so great if “additional sacrifices” are to made it will be my friends and fellow service members that will be the men and woman on the front line.

When the President was asked how Americans would sacrifice he replied that “they are standing in longer lines at the airport.” When we went to war in Europe and the Pacific during the Second World War it was apparent in every small town in this nation that there was sacrifice by each and every American. People rationed, donated, worked harder for less and sometimes went without. Today soldiers return from war to news reports of a new coffee shop opening around the corner, an animal being born in the zoo, and shoppers being trampled over for a video game. They stand in long lines at the airport to listen to passengers grumble about the wait and wonder to themselves if America even realizes a war going on.

If we are a country engaged in a war of necessity than shouldn't a greater portion of our democracy invest more time and energy or at least concern and attention toward the war our military is waging? And if we are not going to maintain a larger more distributed sacrifice because a huge majority of our citizens don’t believe we are on a proper course then shouldn’t we have an elected leadership that represents those views and pulls the troops out?

Certainly we could have a more defined purpose with attainable goals our commanders can work toward. When the administration speaks of success or failure in Iraq it seems unclear to everyone what that entails. We are asked to swallow ideological ramblings to justify a continued sacrifice. I would rather have our foreign policy based on tactical and factual reasoning than a pep rally that abuses America’s patriotism, values and sense of courage. Haven’t we been lied to enough by our own government to have not grown wise to the repetitive talking points?

I hear President Bush claim that “The enemies of liberty” are attempting to foment sectarian violence because they “hate freedom.” From what I can tell on the ground the people in a civil struggle are fighting because they fear a lack of freedom. Two sects battle because of mistrust and polarized sides encouraged by US occupation. These are not people that hate Americans because we are free, they hate us because we occupy their country with our military and neglect their people in favor of profit and exploitation of their resources.

The Department of Defense predicts Al-Qaeda makes up less than five percent of the insurgency in Iraq and they are less desired in the country by the majority of Iraqis than the US military. Why does the President continue to make claims that Iraq will become a terrorist training ground and a haven for extremists? It clearly seems to distract Americans away from the truth and attempts to intimidate us into continuing the war, even expanding it.

Perhaps we should consider all the evidence before weighing in on backing any politician who can not speak beyond threats and propaganda? I want to hear my leaders speak of concrete solutions to the escalating war in the Middle-East. I would like to see leaders that represent the will of our democracy’s majority. Let’s put our military’s capacity, to continue and expand this war, on the table before we enter into a debate about the next phase in the war in Iraq.

the heretic

The Day that Haunts Me...

2006-11-13T09:49:00.000-05:00

"Hellblazer" is an Iraq war veteran and served in the US army as a Specialist Scout. The following, is his account of a battle that took place in Ba'Quba, Iraq in November 2004.
I believe that a good portion of a person's character is forged in times of great hardship.
It is these times that all of our strengths and weaknesses, both mental and physical, come to light.
We either come out of the situation humbled by how it made a quick end to our greatest efforts or confident of our abilities as we overcome.
But sometimes it takes us to another place.
A place where we succeeded in overcoming adversity, but at a cost we couldn't come to bear.
This is the place I visited, and will never forget.

Two years ago, I was a scout stationed in Iraq on a small dusty camp in the city of Ba'Quba.
Troubled times

The city was the largest in the area, containing roughly 300,000 residents. It was also congested, not as spread out as an American city, which made it difficult to operate in it efficiently.

In the past months my job had evolved into riding in the turret of my Humvee, with my two machine guns, patrolling the streets, a task that always seemed to lead to some sort of trouble.
At the time, one half of my unit was in Fallujah, battling the build up of insurgents that had been accumulating for months. Another quarter was north protecting a vital bridge across the Tigris River that insurgents had targeted in the past.
These forces were almost entirely made up of tanks, leaving us with four.

With tanks being the biggest bargaining chip we had, this use of the forces weakened our area, to say the least.
For this reason, my scout platoon, were tasked with keeping Ba'Quba and its surrounding areas under control.
Upon the initial push into Fallujah, insurgents identified the origin of the tanks involved in the fight, which quickly translated into where they came from: Ba'Quba.
With the notion of causing us to withdraw our forces from the Fallujah theatre, the insurgents moved quietly into the city of Ba'Quba the night prior, in preparation for an attack.

Rude awakening

They would not make their presence known until morning.
A deafening explosion, followed by what felt like an earthquake, pulled me out of bed that morning.
Insurgents had begun attacking Iraqi police stations in Ba'Quba, and a patrol in the area called in an air strike to clear a mosque containing armed insurgents. That deafening sound was two, 500-pound bombs making sand of the mosque.

Reports were coming in ranging from 50 to 200 insurgents still alive, attacking the city.
Not knowing what was correct, command assumed the worst.
We responded, in order, with our remaining four tanks, half of my platoon with our four trucks, and another platoon which would follow a good distance behind us, all flowing into the city in one long column.

Exodus

Upon exiting the walls of my camp, and starting the ¾ mile run into the city centre, I saw the peaceful population of Ba'Quba fleeing the city.
Thousands of people, carrying their most prized possessions, scurried down the side if the road, trying to stay as low as possible, as they thought at any moment they could be shot.
I remember one young man looking at me with a fear full eye, as if I myself contained all of the fury of hell within me and was about to unleash it on those remaining in the city.

This brought me to believe that this wasn't just some overzealous commander's response.
Behind the fleeing civilians rose the column of smoke from the bombs that had fallen not long ago. Judging by that, I figured any insurgent that was fighting had left, but either way, the city had to be secured. Once we passed the mass of people coming out of the city, we were left with what appeared to be a ghost town in front of us.

Seconds turned into hours as the first rocket ripped passed the tank in front of me, exploding across the street.

Many more followed in quick succession as the tank rotated it turret and shot its main gun into the building it came from, collapsing its entire front half which the tank quickly filled with machine gun fire.

Our turn...

Having trouble acquiring targets, and under a lot of fire, the tanks quickly pushed through, bringing us up to bat.
At the site of the exposed bodies of my fellow gunners and I standing out of the tops of our humvees, the insurgents quickly increased their efforts. The sides of the street were lined with one to three story buildings, divided by alleys. Every window seemed to have something being shot from it.
The gunfire sounded like popcorn. The tracer bullets still had a faint glow in the daylight.
I instinctively targeted each of these windows.
Much like trying to hit the gopher with the hammer at the arcade, trying to pick one window out of twenty is very difficult. In the confusion, the order came to "shoot anything the moved".
A logical enough order at the time, considering everything that was moving, was also shooting. With this, our four trucks erupted in a wave of hell that I wouldn't wish on anyone. Within seconds, multiple cars were exploding, balconies were collapsing, and buildings were catching ablaze. We moved from block to block.
Each volley of destruction was triggered by the sound of a bullet racing passed my ear, a rocket exploding nearby, or the vengeful eyes of my friends riding in the truck with me.
"Three O'clock, Second Floor! Five O'clock First Floor! Four O'clock Alley!"
I must have heard every combination.

Me or them

The insurgents would start to flee into other alleys only to be greeted by gunners to my front and rear. It was complete chaos, but we were staying alive.
It was me or them, and if I had anything to say about it, it was going to be them. I filled with a rage that I still cannot explain.
I felt my eyes swelling as my heart beat faster and faster, my arms burning from constantly wrenching the gun from target to target, my pores spewing sweat.
My nostrils grabbed the smell of gunpowder and car fires out of the air, my mouth tasted the gun oil coming off with every recoil, my ears ringing with a loudness almost equal to my surroundings.
All the intensity kept building at an almost exponential rate.

The skirmish lasted for nearly an hour, until it started to calm, resulting in only sporadic gunfire. We remained in place while other units in the area finished their objectives.
The muscles in my body had relaxed, but were still having spasms as the final traces of adrenaline left my blood. The sweat and gunpowder had stared to dry into a black dust all over my face and hands.

My mouth was hoarse from yelling to the people in the truck, requesting ammo and water to cool my barrels. During the whole ordeal I never thought to put any water into my own body, and at this point water never tasted so good. I drank half and poured the rest of the bottle over my face.
I dropped the empty bottle down into the truck, which caused a small avalanche of spent shell casings to fall into the floorboards of the truck.
Over 700 of varying calibres covered my feet. I wiped my face with my sleeve, and then it happened.

Missed...

An Iraqi with an AK-47 was running down across the street one block down the alley. I caught him out of the corner of my eye when he was already half way across the street, I quickly swung my gun over, started to fire just before he came into aim, walking the rounds into their intended target; but just as the rounds were about to fall upon him, he made it to the other corner.
I immediately keyed the headset to radio the gunner who was covering the alley he was headed towards.

Before I finished, I heard the gunner down the block fire a burst, followed by some soft chatter on the radio. I don't remember what was being said, because just as that gun cut loose, my attention was fixed on the terror in front of my face.
As the Iraqi had made it out of my field of fire, my gun strafed into a rickety trailer parked right at the corner.

Now falling out from behind this trailer was the body of a teenage boy. The void in his chest replaced what was once his heart and his body convulsed slightly as his nerve endings fired their last.
His body lay there in the filthy dirty street, muddy water surrounding him from the drainage of the nearby houses. A rolling pain stared at my eyes.
I felt it work its way through the optic nerve, and into my brain. It swirled around at the top of my spine, and then drained down.

Sickening

Nausea filled my stomach and a cold feeling overtook my flesh. How long had he been behind that trailer? Had he been there through the whole mess? Not to long afterwards, an older man emerged from around a corner, immediately collapsing nest to the young man's body.
It wasn't long before an ambulance arrived. Then the silence took over again. We would remain in place for another hour so, and then return back to the base, but my mind remains there to this day.

I was told a million times after that day, that what happened was completely out of my control, a series of unfortunate events.
A patriot might say "You did it for you country", while others scream baby killer, and hindsight is always 20/20.
Father says he's proud, friends ask what happened to the person they used to know, and the families of those who died, friend and foe, greave endlessly. I've torn it apart a million times in my head, re-evaluated over and over again, each time with the same result. It was unavoidable, at that moment in time.
E

veryone has their own tragedy, which relative to themselves, is equally painful to them as this was to me.

It is these events that shape us in our many facets.

In the end, we're the ones that have to live with it, but even if I got off easy.

I'm alive.

Hellblazer

Rite of Passage for a Toy Soldier

2006-08-18T15:09:00.000-04:00

Militarization of American life has always bothered me but perhaps even more so after experiencing combat myself. I played with army men and fired my share of paintball guns growing up, however the reality is that the blood and death are not computer graphics and the bodies of the dead and dying don’t disappear or walk of the playground.

The romanticizing of armed conflict has made combat the modern age rite of passage. Boys think they don’t become men until experiencing the trauma of warfare. It instills in our youth false pseudo-patriotism than encourages our society to promote armed aggression.

Movies today depict war like it’s some opportunity to be a main character in some good always wins epic. No body in combat is any more special than the next guy and I have seen the dude that trains harder, shoots better, runs faster, and prays more get mangled in combat as much as the shit bags. IEDs, RPGs, and mortars are indiscriminant and equally tears through flesh and bone of whoever is unlucky enough to be close by.

Because of my fantasies about warfare I was completely ill prepared for the real thing. It was a system shock that every soldier must adapt to on the field of battle. There is very little honor in it and we boil down to basic instincts that are barely kept in check by military training. The courageous movie shots and imagined heroism is stripped away into desperate survival and fear.

Popular society will never fully capture the true aspect of combat because it is far too ugly to market. You can not package something so insane in plastic or wear it like a tee shirt. Children would not play with toys that conjure the hideous dreams my shattered psyche is left to mill.

Innocence is far more sacred than I believed before I hastily tried to do away with it to become some damned hardened warrior. I would have faired better if I were made of plastic like the toys I played with as a child.

the heretic

The Sure Cure For Boredom

2006-06-30T17:07:00.000-04:00

People sometimes ask me if there’s a chance the United States could use another draft to continue its War on Terrorism. In my opinion it’s a toss-up. America never expected a draft in Vietnam, but she got one anyways. Although it’s hard to compare Vietnam to Iraq, it is not unreasonable to assume that, despite talks of a troop withdrawal in the media, the war could very well continue into the next decade and with no easy solutions in the end. As little progress is made within Iraqi security forces and sectarian violence swings closer to a full scale civil war, the United States finds itself continuously stuck between an ‘altruistic’ rock and its ‘accountability’ hard place. If the war is to be won expediently, from a strategic standpoint, then it will surely require more boots on the ground. If we continue in our efforts with a scant amount of soldiers, then surely no progress will be achieved. The insurgency grows in number and proficiency everyday. Real, actual terrorist cells are beginning to consolidate and disperse throughout the entire Middle East region. And U.S. troop morale is expectedly declining with tremendous momentum. Our historical reaction to this growing calamity is to throw more bombs, bullets and troops at the problem. But with a very ominous haze on the desert horizon, it seems as though something is going to give, and in a big way.

One year ago I returned home after service in the army and Iraq. Needless to say, I was irate. I couldn’t stand that I had played a role in a war for US Empire and corporate hegemony. One day, my father and I were discussing my plans to speak out against the war. He mentioned a draft. Reflecting on his youth during the Vietnam War, he recalled a government desperate for more cannon fodder in an equally confusing and unjust war. In his opinion, it was the draft that stirred the psyche of the American public and motivated the youth to make a stand against the war. As more everyday citizens became just another name on a KIA list, so too did the anger and frustration enter the minds of those everyday citizens' families. His conclusion was that the draft was the catalyst that sparked a popular opposition to the war.

"Instead of going out there with the rest of them, rantin’ and ravin’ to 'Bring the troops home NOW!", my father expressed to me, "Why not instead hold a sign that says, End the war, Start the Draft!"

At the time, I could never support this mentality. "Never in hell", I thought to myself, "would I ever wish for innocent civilians to kill or be killed in an unjust war." I weighed the consequences of a draft. Sure, it sounded like a perfectly good way of bringing this war home to the average American, thus ending it altogether. But could I ever advocate a draft, and then also stand quietly by and watch my younger brother open a letter from Uncle Scam with orders to go fight in any random conflict of our government's choosing? Would I then have to live up to a pro-draft stance by allowing him to go marching off to war, only to watch his remains being lowered into a cold earthen grave?

I told my father that although I agree with his reasoning in theory, I could never advocate such a ghastly thing. I pictured every young American woman or man being sent overseas for no good reasons, despite what their feelings may be about it. Corporate War. Absolute Rule. No choice. Only conscription. Is that a free society? Unlike them, I had made my choice to serve in the army, for good or ill. But these unfortunate souls would be morphed over night from hard working-fun loving-studying or playing or raising a family-young adults, into faceless storm troopers serving the empire. Then they die. And for what? The good old days of "the good fight" are long gone. We no longer send troops overseas to conquer fascism and genocide. In fact, our corporate-democracy supports such things all over the world. So why then, in a million years, would I wish for the innocent and naive to fight for absurd reasons and corrupt systems?

My father told me that I was an idealist.

"I'm telling you son, if you want to end this goddamn war, you need a draft. Too many Americans are sitting at home watching TV just perfectly comfortable supporting the troops, but they don't know why. In fact, many haven't even considered why the troops are there in the first place. But I guarantee you this: If they were sitting there watching TV and all of a sudden a news flash came on and there's Bush and Rumsfeld telling the American public that in the next 48 hours a national draft will be implemented, I guarantee their precious approval ratings would plunder overnight. The war is already unpopular for the most part. I'm telling you, the average American won't stand for it! They would have to come to terms with little Johnny being pulled out of school and sent over to die. Start the draft. End the war. See, it has a pretty nice ring to it, don't you think?"

My father is a pragmatist. He doesn't see things in hyper-color like I do. Only black and white. Which is a quality I greatly admire in him, but it does get annoying sometimes. His common sense logic sometimes comes off as typical conservative rhetoric, except that it never involves Jesus, moral rectitude, or blatant denial. It always comes down to the bottom dollar and, in the long run, makes pretty good sense. It certainly makes for very tough and heated debates. He is the type that firmly believes in cutting the bullshit out of it. "Just the facts, Ma'am", he always says. This is why he voted republican all throughout my childhood. That is, until George W. Bush came along. My father claims that “George W. and his Band of Merry Thieves” has "went and decimated the pride and decency of the Republican Party" (If there ever was any).

Interestingly enough, he voted for Nader in 2004. It was a huge shock for my family. "Democrats and Republicans are in the same boat. Kerry and Bush can both go to hell, for all I'm concerned. If I have to vote between dumb and dumber, I'd much rather vote for the guy who wants to smoke dope all day. At least our tax dollars will go to something more useful than million dollar bombs. More worthless than a Roman candle! Watch your hard-earned money go up in a cloud of smoke! Talk about burning a hole in your pocket."

His political ideologies are certainly anachronistic to the trends of contemporary neo-conservatism. He is a blue-collar country boy with an excellent reputation for business management. He is a no nonsense negotiator and a true friend to the working class. He mows his own lawn and watches football on Sundays. He's a family man and a patriot. I'm sure him and Thomas Jefferson would have been good fishing buddies. Truly he is among the last "real" republicans in America.

"But how would you think about your second born being forced into the same war that nearly took my own life on numerous occasions?"

"Well, of course I wouldn't like that very much. It would be devastating. But I would rather your brother go over there and serve his time than have you get called back to do it all over again. That isn't fair to you, or to the many other veterans who have already served. That's wrong. In Vietnam, you served a year and that was it. None of this getting called back time and time again to fight the same fight, to fight the same bullshit. If we are a country dedicated to fight this War on Terror, than everyone should do their part, and that includes those of us too old to do it. No one except those in uniform are doing their part. Everyone else is slacking off and watching it unravel from the safe distance of their living room. If Bush says, "Bring it on", than we should really bring it on, and fight this war the right way. Either do it right, or get the hell out."

"But what about those who do not support this war or this administration? There are those out there who oppose this whole debacle. Would it be fair to make them go off and fight, to put them in harm's way when they never supported it in the first place?"

"Jeff, I'm telling you, it’s only fair. What's not fair to make the same guys do the job over and over and over again. We are a nation. That means we are united by a belief that we are all in this together. If we don't share the responsibilities of our troubles, than we are surely doomed. I support the citizens who oppose war. I support dissent against the government. That's what makes America great, our God given right as people to be free and to speak our minds. But those who would detach themselves from this, this problem, this whatever you like to call it, are irresponsible citizens. If someone disagrees with the war, than they should be out there doing something to stop it, not just whining about it or complaining when it’s convenient. And that's what's happening now. Start the draft, Mister President. If you want this war so goddamn bad, then get everyone involved. If not, get the hell out of Iraq or get the hell out of the White House so we can get someone else in there who can do it right."

"I just cannot put my name next to something as horrible as a draft."

"Listen, son. If you start the draft, it will force Americans to take stock in this mess. It will force themselves to analyze the meaning of it. There is no meaning to it. They will see that. They will force this band of bandits in the White House to pull the plug on it. They will end the war."

That was a year ago.

Since then, many things have changed. When I got home from Iraq there was a yellow ribbon on every fucking car in every city I traveled to. But over time I began to notice less of them. I can only guess that some people are no longer willing to display their support for a Lost Cause.

We are the Band-Wagon Patriots. Times are always good when you’re on the winning team. The terrorists may have sucker-punched us on September Eleventh, but we came with the Top Guns on the Twelfth, and oh boy did we ever come out shootin’! For a time life was good. It was fun and exciting to see smart bombs and the Greatest military in the world pick apart the bad guys and really stick it to Saddam. But eventually we pissed on our own charade through horrible scandals and too many bloody details. Like rats on a sinking ship, we saved ourselves from drowning in a quagmire of embarrassment by hurling our Chinese-made “support” from the rear bumper of our SUVs.

With the ribbons also went the support of our current administration. Polls show that approximately 54% of Americans disagree with the handling of the war, and that 62% think George W. Bush is worse than a blind date with Ann Coulter. There is no bright end of the tunnel for W’s failed and flawed presidency, and not even Zarqowi’s death or the praise of Bible-thumping evangelicals can save his pathetic ass now.

Less people seem willing to believe that Iraq had anything to do with the attacks on 9-11 or that they ever had any WMD's. More people are now, finally three years later, coming to terms with the fact that we were duped into supporting the illegitimate invasion of a sovereign nation. The popular reasons for the war shifted away from “Freedom and Democracy” to the desperate pretext of establishing “a frontline in the war on terror”. But when the day is done and all the newspeak is spoken, I hear more people simplify the war into terms of "just grabbing their oil."

In just one year, more generals shed their devout obedience to the Pentagon and criticized the "Honorable" Donald Rumsfeld as being a bungling buffoon. They have called him out for his incompetence and irresponsibility in the strategic handling of the war. Likewise, more rank and file soldiers are now returning home and speaking out to the public. And who better to speak out than a soldier? The average citizen seems to understand this, and when it’s the soldier’s word against that of the lying bastards in the White House, the final bet is placed on the grunts.

The war, and the people who run it, have come to be viewed as malicious and stupid. More and more Americans are beginning to wake up and see the damage done over the last six years.

Perhaps a draft is on people's minds. Every now and then that horrible word pops up in national debate. This is especially true as bigger and more complicated problems such as Iran and North Korea compound the overall dilemma that pervades in Iraq and Afghanistan today. The administration keeps insisting that a draft is simply unnecessary and therefore not an issue, but just how are 160,000 troops supposed to combat three major problem areas on the globe?

It seems obvious that if we are to confront several different countries on an open battlefield, a draft is pretty much inevitable.

It's my belief that these crooked politicians, whether Republican or Democrat, shudder at the thought of a draft. For one, they also know a draft would end their conflict, much like what happened in Vietnam. And if war is money, especially big money for corporations who perpetuate world-wide conflict (to name a few: Halliburton, GE, United Technologies, Boeing, Bechtel, Raytheon, etc.), then why end a good thing? Especially when that good thing happens to be a perfectly profitable cash cow for super-wealthy, elitist white males in CEO positions with greedy little hooks elbow-deep in instrumental branches of state and government?

But just how long can the United States government continue to enforce its hegemony on the world through military force when there is very little military force to enforce it?

Conscription has been used in the past when circumstances were viewed as dire. As such was necessary in the Civil War to maintain the Union, or in World War One and Two to battle the evil scourge of fascism. Or perhaps in Vietnam to battle communism. To battle communism? To battle a flawed perception of society? Flex some muscle? Prove who's the biggest boy on the block? That shit doesn't go over well with the average citizen. To say that a draft is needed in the War on Terror to battle the indefinable menace of "terrorism” is equally ludicrous and deserves to fail. This war has no face value to it. But when a family sends its son or daughter off to war, that person has a face, and it’s the face of one who is loved.

It is very hard for me to admit that a draft could prove to be a good thing. To say the ends justify the means comes off as callous. But since that conversation with my father one year ago, I have to admit that some of my views have changed. Despite the fact that more opposition is being mounted against this war and the president, I still believe that most of America really doesn't give a shit either way.

When I see 18 or 19 year old kids in town, I cannot help to feel sorry for them. Here is a whole generation of youth, of children, who will most likely be affected by this war or future wars in very drastic ways. Yet they cannot see past their obsessions with flashy cars, X-BOX, text-messages, supermodels, Hollywood actors, IPods, MTV, American Idol, shopping malls, who’s throwing the big kegger this weekend, or who is having sexual intercourse with whom. They are a generation ripe for the taking, but they could care less. Like a kid in a candy store, just keep giving them suga’, and they’ll eat the bullshit right out of your hand.

We older Americans are equally apathetic. Those of us considered adults are perfectly happy by removing ourselves from mature responsibilities. What's not our problem is truly not our problem. Totally complacent and completely at one with the materialistic world in which we live. A privileged strain of human beings. We certainly are the Fat of the land. Meanwhile dark-skinned indigents in countries we cannot pronounce starve to death by the hour. Salaries are plush, but debt is tremendous. Remember, good consumers are good citizens, and who doesn’t like shopping? Gas prices are never too high. C’mon and hop on the Consumer Train…constantly feeding our urban assault vehicles to tow a miniature yacht and matching jet-skis to a polluted lake 300 miles away. Save money for play, shop at Wal-Mart...Low low prices Everyday. Death in the news reports being filtered through biased and controlled media. Five more soldiers killed in a roadside bomb, tiny headlines streaming across the bottom of the screen, underscoring the BIG news about the wrongs and immorality of homosexual congregations. Constantly living in fear of our own shadow while being ruled by a shadow democracy, in which we are not participants but merely spectators. Hope for the best, but expect the worse. Oh well, I wasn’t using my Bill of Rights anyways. That's life, I suppose. Why bother to vote when it won't make a difference anyhow...

Who knows? Maybe a draft really could rock our world.

---
Posted by hEkLE

Jokers

2006-06-19T12:13:00.000-04:00

It seems to me every soldier gets a keen sense of humor from their military service. I was wondering as of late how come all the guys I served with have the same cynical funny bones and we all get the giggle shits over similar dark comedy.

I believe through all the helpless hardship we experience that it hardens our spirit in a way. We become cynical because it is a last ditch effort to keep our sanity when dreary chaos and hard labor is all that a soldier’s life provides.

Then again perhaps we are all desensitized mad men and the military has warped us beyond repair. How can a person keep reason in a warrior’s profession? Maybe you must be mad to even contemplate service in this day and age, so psychopaths and the deranged naturally migrate to the Armed Forces?

Either way, I have laughed off sniper fire, joked about children losing limbs, cried tears of joy over incoming mortar rounds and even made light of fallen comrades. The Full Metal Jacket character, Joker, seems to be the embodiment of the soldier satire. No matter how bad it gets and will surely be made fun off.

After all, the world is an absurd place so we might as well have fun while we are here.

the heretic

Always Look on the Bright Side of Life

words and music by Eric Idle

Some things in life are bad
They can really make you mad
Other things just make you swear and curse.
When you're chewing on life's gristle
Don't grumble, give a whistle
And this'll help things turn out for the best...
And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...
If life seems jolly rotten
There's something you've forgotten
And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing.
When you're feeling in the dumps
Don't be silly chumps
Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing.
And...always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the light side of life...
For life is quite absurd
And death's the final word
You must always face the curtain with a bow.
Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin
Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow.
So always look on the bright side of death
Just before you draw your terminal breath
Life's a piece of shit
When you look at it
Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true.
You'll see it's all a show
Keep 'em laughing as you go
Just remember that the last laugh is on you.
And always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the right side of life...
(Come on guys, cheer up!)
Always look on the bright side of life...
Always look on the bright side of life...
(Worse things happen at sea, you know.)
Always look on the bright side of life...
(I mean - what have you got to lose?)
(You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing.
What have you lost? Nothing!)
Always look on the right side of life...

Hate Breeders

2006-06-13T12:50:00.000-04:00

This is from a veteran friend of mine who is in America's heartland were there are few people that share his views on the Iraq War. I am amazed at the thin lines that divide us, race, religion, class, gender, sexuality, and even tee-shirts.

the heretic

What a Difference...

Today I went to the skate park like I normaly do, just another
day... I ride BMX on the ramps, usually I can talk to anyone there
and everyone is pretty open, today a young boy was riding there too
as his father watched him cautiously. I noticed the father kept
looking at me and I couldn't understand why, I thought maybe it was
because he liked the tricks I was doing, I rode over and sat by him
and a few other guys, I tried cracking a few jokes but nobody even
made the effort to smile so I though ok this is awkword and I rode
back over to the ramps, they kept staring and eventually giving me a
dirty mean glare, thats when I looked down and noticed I was wearing
my IVAW t-shirt. Later I rode over by them again but not so close
and kinda listend to their conversation, alot of hateful words, alot
of "if you don't love it leave it" kinda talk so I just rode away
and rolled my eyes. I then started to look at his little boy in a
different way, I was thinking what if he lived in Iraq and he had to
worry every day about his son being hit by a military convoy?, or
caught in a crossfire in a blazing fire fight?, would his opinion
change then? Who knows, he probably had this Zarqowi crap
brainwashed into his head by now. All I know is that if I wasn't
wearing that t-shirt I probably could have made a few friends, it's
amazing what people base their opinions off of, it's amazing how
someone could be so blind as to believe what they see on the news
being told by some business man in a suit and tie who has never been
stationed in the suni triangle as opposed to a young EX soldier who
has been there and seen the horrified look on the faces of innocent
civillions as we drive by and point guns in their faces and the
faces of their children and watched a thumbs up gradually turn into
a middle finger over time. A complete and total stranger was
willing to hate a veteran of Iraq because he doesnt agree with this
war, what a world we live in... it's things like this that make all
of these countries hate us. I watched something on the news
yesterday about the KKK doing some kind of protest, how on earth
could a group of people be so willing to hate another man because of
the color of his skin, not becasue of religion, or any other thing,
just the fact that they were born with a different skin pigment. I
think if I was brought up in another country I would definately hate
americans. But everybody is too busy shopping, buying Ipods, SUV's,
DVD players, and god knows what other crap they don't need... I
don't know maybe I am just thinking too much but damn, can a veteran
get some mercy here?

Written by Lost Soul

Baghdad Emergancy Room

2006-05-18T13:04:00.000-04:00

I just watched the opening of Baghdad ER at the American History Smithsonian. The docs that were in the film were there as well as a few of the soldiers that were wounded, the mother of one of the Marines that dies on the operating table and a few celebrities from the Sopranos.

Perhaps because I am a Veteran the graphic content and context of wounded soldiers fighting for their lives and hospital staff desperately trying to save them hit hard and fast. I was instantly dizzy and uncomfortable.

Over and over again injured troops came into the ER with multiple kinds of wounds from shrapnel from Improvised Explosive Devices to gut wounds from sniper fire. It stirred the shaky memories that I have tried suppress since leaving that hellish war.

It was so intense I had to walk out twice and get some fresh air. As a soldier, on the ground when someone is injured you go into robot mode. You follow step one, step two, step three. You try to keep your buddies alive until a med-evac gets there. You never see the other side, where the bird lands and what the docs do. It is traumatic and tragic.

It was incredible to see the staff’s views of the war after dealing with dying and injured soldiers. The casualties roll in twenty-four hours a day and ninety percent of all soldiers wounded survive their wounds.

The Chaplin was my favorite staff member. He prayed over the dead soldiers with pleas for peace and an end to the war. Often using adjectives like “hellish war” or “senseless war”.

I advise veterans not to see it, but I beg for everyone that has not served in war to watch with a compassionate heart. If you have any empathy at all you will not survive the entire show without tears in your eyes.

I hope this brings the war home to every HBO watcher with the courage and consideration to not turn their television off and walk away. I hope that the “freak show” quality of entertainment will register in the minds of the viewers as something that is grossly wrong and they will be motivated to help end this conflict.

This show is powerful

The Drug of War

2006-04-27T13:22:00.000-04:00

Written by a fellow scout in the Shadow Recon Platoon of 2-63AR BN,

If one repeatedly rubs their hand lightly across a rough surface, the hand will become numb to the sensation and to any sensation of equal or lesser intensity. This holds true for the mind. If one constantly exposes themselves to extreme situations, then all sensations there after of equal or lesser intensity offer no stimulation. A heroin addict must constantly increase the dose because the mind has grown tolerant to a lower dosage. A cocaine addict must snort more and more to obtain the same rush of endorphins that was felt the first time. This constant increase to obtain a desired effect is met with graduation to a more intense medium or fatality. However, a higher dosage or different medium does not always exist to take the addict to the next level, and even if he were to continue to utilize his current choices, the supply is not always infinite. When the supply diminishes, one is left numb to all sensation, and hence follows an increasingly desperate situation. For the soldier; war is his drug. His mind grows an addiction to its ravenous stimuli from abnormally stressful situations. His time within this medium is finite, and when it comes to an end, he will find it hard to deal with his unwanted addiction. This is the tragedy of all those who have fallen to the drug of war, myself included. Life becomes dull and frustrating. Normal situations make one feel a sense of anxiety, of desperation, as if constantly hoping for a sudden horrible rage to sweep across and take normal right down to hell, where things are violent, and gruesome, and stimulating, and the adrenaline flows. Where veins bulge and the mind sweats, and purpose is abundantly clear, to fight, to win, to love the drug of war. But it is no more. I feel the phantom left behind by this drug milling around in my mind, and I hear its fateful whispers, begging me to take it back to where the drug flows endless. I beat this demon down everyday, and come to grips with my reality. That I am a shelved piece of machinery that must now perform tasks it was never meant to. This is life for those whose purpose was unique but is no more. This is life through the eyes of a weapon of which the machine has no use for anymore.

Normal people can sit in front of the television for hours, hypnotized by its glow. I too am hypnotized by the colorful piece of technology, but this only makes me think of things that have come to pass. I become mesmerized and soon feel myself drifting into deep thought, where I reflect on the time when watching a movie on my dusty television was a temporary escape from the madness that surrounded me. I always go back to many times where I would be watching television, and my mind would suddenly be ripped out of its blissful hypnosis. Some barking doomsayer telling me I had to go exterminate a hoard of insurgents that were armed to the teeth and sure to totally annihilate all in their path if I did not get my ass up from that television and get my war on. It is not only my mind, but also the television itself that can sometimes remind of me of yesteryear. The news-ticker that flutters at the bottom of the screen is like a scoreboard for the big game going on 3000 miles away. I'll see a familiar name of a town or city, and quickly be sucked through a tunnel, and put right back in the turret of the war machine, cruising through the streets of the before mentioned town. Sometimes my mind gets confused as to why the couch has suddenly been turned into a nylon strap, suspending my body in my armored devil. I might even be so lucky as to have a scent receptor in my nose short circuit and suddenly send the smell of shit-filled dust into my mind. Those sort of high quality trips are few and far between, but none-the-less, noteworthy experiences. Not even the machine that has been said to be responsible for the degradation of youthful intelligence, the television, can keep my mind far from where it wants to be.

Driving presents its own unique set of experiences. Everyone at one point or another daydreams while cruising down the highway in their vehicles. Perhaps it is the flash card animation of lane markings that streams from an infinitely distant focal point or the gentle hum of the engine and the wind rushing by. But unlike soccer moms wondering if they are forgetting a child, or young teenagers imagining themselves performing the songs on the radio, I find myself imagining those long dusty desert highways that seemed to go on forever. Those highways who’s beautifully barren surroundings looked so familiar to the photographs taken by some robotic probe on Mars. That foreign planet that seemed so desperately inhospitable. Just as I’ve made peace with the vicious beauty, and temporarily looking through this strange perception, I am suddenly surrounded by the angry inhabitants of this barren world, who want nothing more then to rid their world of these dastardly villains. This is all a hallucination, and I suddenly find myself drifting onto the shoulder of the highway, perspiring slightly and clinching the steering wheel. I find myself completely in shock, and desperately try to rid my mind of these foul memories.

It is not just the constantly resurfacing memories that plague my psyche everyday, but the alienation I feel. My experiences and my grasp on the world separate me from the people around me who are strangers to the hell their fellow human beings are capable of. Who speak of war as if it is their entertainment, as if they are residents of a city who’s team is nearly undefeated on the road. I am alienated from these people who buy me drinks and praise me for my service to their country. Who thank me for all those dirty Arab bastards that I ghosted in the name of freedom, democracy, basic cable, and free trips to the salad bar. I am not these pseudo patriots who go on to tell me how they would’ve been in the desert with me, if they didn’t have such a dynamite job, or a bad knee, or a promising future at the local university. I hate them for their gross ignorance, as they declare they would kill without hesitation. I envy them for the fact they unknowingly avoided a completely screwed existence and I loathe the reasoning that those who never went wish they did, and those that have wish they hadn’t. How those who were there that never quenched their urge to kill bullshit themselves silly in order to make up for the sense of inferiority that they have imposed upon themselves and how those who did wish they never had. I often find myself at the bar, briefly separated from my newly found friends who are strangers to my world, and begin to deeply miss those that shared my experiences. The ones that match me in all categories, the ones whom I could have a conversation with and didn’t try to make up for their regrets by trying to share my experiences that they deem glorious. I miss the bond we had, “we few, we happy few, we band of brothers. For he today who sheds his blood with me shall be my brother. Be he ne’er so vile, this day shall gentle his condition, and gentlemen in England now abed shall think themselves accursed they were not here, and hold their manhood cheap whilst any speaks, that fought with us…” It only aggravates me further to know that William Shakespeare would have made better company then those surrounding me now.

No matter what I’m doing, or where I am at, nothing can keep my mind from reeling for that drug once more. It cries out in agony and makes me wish it never happened, when in reality, all my mind wants is more, more, more. To return to that time when the skills bestowed upon it were so easily applied to the tasks at hand. There is a sliver of light that breaks through the fog, that being that I wasn’t always this instrument of war. My mind and body was merely transformed to suit the needs of the powers to be. Before I was the soldier, the killer, the destroyer of worlds; I was innocent, and naïve, and unknowing of the horrors that my fellow humans were capable of. I was proud of the soldier and praised him for every enemy he killed, and I lavished in the thought that I too would do the same. I told myself that I would be there if it weren’t for the fact that I was too young, or still in school, or desperately in love with a girl. But this picture of the past is only just that, a picture. As a lethal sword was once nothing more then metal in the earth, I was once but a simple boy before I became a soldier. Just as that sword will never return to the earth, I will never again be a simple boy. I can only hope that by voicing how my experiences have changed my life, I can minimize the number of people that have to go through the same, and those that must, do so for a good reason.

Hellblazer

Some Troops Say "Bull Shit!"

2006-04-17T17:43:00.000-04:00

Whether or not the troops support the war in Iraq has been a contested subject since the initial invasion. If you make your judgment based on the “Troops in Support Of the War” article in April 13th’s Washington Post you would tend to believe that the majority of soldiers back the war. However, unlike the author of the article, I was at the town hall meeting where Rep. John Murtha expressed his plan for a troop withdraw from Iraq based on a responsible timetable. A former Captain in the First Armor Division said “As a fellow Iraq Veteran who also attended and spoke at the Murtha Town Hall event I took away a different view.” “I understood him to believe that if we do not provide the proper equipment, man power, and support for them to win then we should not be putting them in harms way.” In fact, the majority of veterans that spoke publicly at that event addressed a desire for accountability of the leaders and administration in the fraudulent lead up to the War in Iraq, poor planning in it’s execution, or the mishandling of the following occupation. Most of the veterans attending had negative views about the War in Iraq.

The lone veteran in the audience, Mark Seavey, that claimed he and many other veterans supported the Iraq War, actually never served in Iraq at all. Sergeant Seavey is an Afghanistan Veteran, that is not only involved with the Veterans For Freedom, a notorious right wing swift boating organization, but also is on the payroll of the American Legion, a Veteran Service Organization who has supported the Iraq War openly..

There is an immense difference between the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. For one, there was no connection between Iraq and the September 11th terrorist attacks and zero cooperation between Saddam Hussein and Osama Bin Laden based on the 9/11 Commission Report, that was conducted by equal part Democrats and Republicans. President Bush used the terrorist attacks as a primary reason to invade Iraq in his Letter to Congress using Public Law 107-243, resulting in an illegitimate use of force. The conflict in Afghanistan was internationally supported by the United Nations and the United States Congress.

As veterans themselves, Rep. Murth and Sgt. Seavy, are qualified to comment on troop morale and support for the war. However, having served as a sniper in the First Infantry Division, deployed to Baquba, Iraq from Feb. 2004 to Feb. 2005, I have a better understanding of the mindset belonging to the soldiers fighting in our current conflict. The majority of them were in low spirits, not only due to the expected reasons of stress, hostile environment, risk of injury or death, being tired, hot, hungry and homesick, but also because the reasons for fighting in Iraq are ambiguous, at best.

With a plummeting public support for the war it is becoming more difficult for the soldiers serving to swallow the over emphasized patriotic ideals that have been hijacked to guilt Americans into backing the false war effort. Not only is the civilian polls turning from the war, also senior military leadership is gaining the courage to stand up for the enlisted soldiers. Commanders like General Anthony Zinni, Lieutenant General Gregory Newbold, Major General Paul Eaton, and my own Division Commander Major General John Batiste have all been outspoken about the neglectful manner in which the administration has endangered soldiers and national security by attacking Iraq instead of focusing on legitimate terrorist targets.

America’s and the Senior Leadership’s views might have an impact on the troops opinions of the Iraq War, however I believe that it is the truth on the ground that sways the belief of the average soldier. Although, unless asked anonymously, like in the recent Zogby Poll, most soldiers fear repercussions from their chain of command if they express their honest feelings about the politics behind the conflict. Most politicians and Generals that visit soldiers in the combat zone encounter pre-groomed soldiers that the local command knows will not question the war and lead to possible embarrassment. Further more no soldier that has a critical opinion about the war will voice his concern in front of his superiors.

If we take a look at recruiting numbers and volunteering to serve additional combat tours you might again be led astray. Many of the soldiers in service today have little control on weather they choose to have multiple deployments. If a soldier’s unit is returning to Iraq they have little option but to go. The lack of employment options in the civilian sector has a direct impact on reenlistment and recruitment numbers. Many modern day soldiers are married with families. A large portion of these soldiers make the sacrifice to reenlist because they are supporting their family who live on a secure military base where they have free housing and an affordable lifestyle. Meanwhile, recruiting statistics are misleading because the military has lowered standards for enlistment and altered the goals to meet the recruiting levels. Even with the increased reenlistment bonuses and challenges of returning to the civilian lifestyle, Junior Officers are separating from service at an alarming rate.

Although the morale and views of soldiers should be considered when forming a conclusion on the war, it is society that should be the final verdict on weather the war should be supported or not. When a soldier puts on the uniform he realizes he has become an instrument of his democracy. If the majority of America chooses to use military force it is the soldier that is the person that goes to war. Weather we agree with the causes or not we have sworn an obligation to fight for our nation. As the public continues to agree that US Forces should withdraw from Iraq, where is our leadership representing the bulk of the country?

My support for the war I fought has dissolved, but I can not speak for all veterans, nor can Rep. John Murtha, and nor can Wade Zirkle. An individual can only represent their own views honestly. I encourage our citizens to seek the views of veterans from every rank, branch and current organization for a true assessment of their experience and beliefs.

the heretic

MIND FUCK

2006-02-28T19:19:00.000-05:00

I have been throwing some heavy ideas around about Post Traumatic Stress Disorder while trying to cope with my experience in Iraq. I agree that PTSD is a real and psychological injury, however the additional injuries seem more prevalent. There is a form of Character Damage that a soldier goes through while at war. When he steps away from the protective bubble of noble cause and patriotic duty the veteran comes into doubt about many aspects of the reality he once precieved. I have been calling it WTFS (What the Fuck Syndrome) or the search for meaning.

After I shot my first civilian I was very upset. I went back to my connex and trashed the place. I brought my frustration up to my chain of command and was directed to my chaplain. The very first thing he told me was that I was doing Gods work and I did what I did for my country’s and family’s safety. I was told I was in God’s hands and was an instrument of the lord. This was all very interesting, and even more angering, because I am an Atheist.

I realized what this officer was immediately doing was trying to construct meaning for my actions. In fact he was trying to manufacture meaning for the entire war. I saw through it and began to question my involvement in the entire operation.

Without that essential meaning there is a break down in personal identity, or the frame in which I think nails it, Character Damage. If there is one thing that every soldier seems to experience after being in combat or the war itself, no matter what his former personal beliefs, is doubt. Soldiers have to recreate their character based sometimes on who they were pre military, pre war, mid war or invent a whole new creature. Sometimes the personality we build is self destructive and sometimes we never solidify. Those are all mental illnesses attributed to the war that leaves veterans disabled.

One of my most significant realizations is that I am not suffering from PTSD in the classic sense that I experience a single traumatic event that left damaged my ability to react normally to my environment. In fact the comparison that I am alike some victim that was assaulted, abused or raped is very upsetting.

In most cases the American soldier is the perpetrator not the victim. I feel like the thief, rapist and murderer. I have caused others PTSD. I have returned to America unlike the criminals of society who serve time in prison and sometimes feel as if they suffered enough and have achieved some zero karma balance. I have returned a god damn hero. I suffer with feelings of guilt over what I have done and shame over who I’ve become and I have people thanking me for what I did.

Soldiers go unpunished and, consciously or not, go about punishing themselves. They drink them selves to death, fail in relationships, alienate their friends, get hooked on drugs, abuse their family, take unneeded risks, and commit suicide, all in the attempt to reach some sort of satisfactory punishment.

I have done some things that, in my opinion, have helped, all by accident, or perhaps instinct. I spoke out against what I have done through the anti-war movement and expressed the awfulness of my actions in war. I have admitted they were wrong and made a conscious decision to never do them again. I have worked to end the war, I am developing peer counseling circles and I’m advocating for veteran benefits. All these are old religious methods that I learned to do without the dogma, confession, repentance, and atonement. These three methods have empowered me and given me a tool to channel all that negative experience in to constructive solutions.

I believe these soldiers that are being screwed over at their medical board are being misdiagnosed because the classic PTSD symptoms do not fully explain the soldier’s problem. They are suffering from these injuries that are directly related to their war experience and when they come home it prevents them from adjusting on an equal level with their peers who chose not to serve. Which means the Department of Defense and the Veterans Affairs are accountable to a form of disability that compensates for the veteran’s injury.

the heretic

EVANGELICAL MANIFESTO

2006-02-13T07:31:00.000-05:00

Vision for America
By Rob Brendle, Associate Pastor of NEW LIFE CHURCH

I have a vision for America: God formed this nation—his sovereignty ordained its existence—and he wants it back.

America is a Christian nation. Its heritage is comprised of the stories of people of faith, its legal code founded in Holy Scripture, its moral fabric informed by the collective conscience of a generation of God-fearing men. A veritable city on a hill, as the great Ronald Reagan put it, our country is a favorite son of the Creator himself, reminiscent of the people of Israel some 6000 years hence.

We, the evangelical community of 21st-century America, have an assignment from God to right the ship. Uniquely aware of God's purpose, we bear the burden of responsibility for sounding the alarm, mobilizing the faithful, and exacting the changes that must happen for America to realize her potential. Most of us would prefer to live ordinary, quiet lives—to sail along comfortably on the ship of prosperity, self-indulgence, and ease that our contemporaries have constructed—and allow our land to follow the path of least resistance. But we cannot. We must not, and we will not, for we know. And once you know—like Neo swallowing the red pill—you can never pretend to go back to not knowing.

We evangelicals know we must oppose the trend of moral degradation. We must resist the bidding of virtue-bankrupt secularists whose vision for America is wiped clean of the fingerprints of the Creator and sanitized of any of his will. We must avail ourselves of every resource of democracy and capitalism to turn the tide of personal decadence and societal depravity. We must reverse the trajectory of ridding our public institutions of the emblems and expressions of their author. We must arrest the decay of our popular conscience. We must fight.

A handful of anti-religious zealots is duping the rest of the country. Feigning intellectual superiority over the rest of us common schleps, this small minority of hyper-empowered ideologues insists that the path which precipitated Europe's decline—the road of abject secularization—is the only conscionable way ahead for a pluralistic society. Over the last two decades, they have laid the trap of silly political correctness that now ensnares all who dare expose their obvious folly. Now, many years into the how-dare-you-believe-anything-concrete campaign, the stage is set for their coup d'état. Wasting no time, they've laid siege to the public perception, deposed Decency, its long-time ruler, and declared Tolerance the new dictator. What's resulted is an ironic sort of Emperor's New Clothes syndrome, whereby anyone who questions the obviously flawed new regime is socially ostracized.

It's a nation of ironies now. Tolerance is really intolerance for anything not milquetoast. Freedom is actually tyranny of the enlightened, snobbish, and afraid. Yes, afraid. Why do secularists fear religion? Simple: It exposes them. Our faith and virtue highlight the self-indulgent and destructive behaviors of a class who answers to no one. Our beliefs threaten to weigh them on the scales and leave them founding wanting, and they dread that day of disclosure.

And let's be honest. Nobody really believes in freedom anymore. I simply fight to replace one form of tyranny with another. Depose the evil dictator and enthrone a benevolent one. As a Christian nation, America would serve, yes, but it would serve the one true living God. It would proceed in that singular confidence of obedience and that unique assurance of righteousness.

We need God's light to shine on our nation again. To get there, I advocate the following measures:

Use our majority power. What can 50 million American Christians accomplish through a representative government? Absolutely anything we want to. We ought to take a lesson from the Islamic citizens of Western European nations, who move in, settle down, reproduce, outnumber, and change the law to suit themselves. Or consider Iraq: in their first real national election, the Shii majority voted themselves to power and shaped the founding documents to reflect their ideals. Did you know that the National Association of Evangelicals is the third largest organization in America, after the Democratic and Republican parties? The latent power of that many people is staggering. We have a responsibility to connect with, energize, and mobilize the sleeping giant that is the American church.

Change the law. So what should these millions be about the business of? First, legislation. We have majorities capable of electing our own kind in the lion share of the nation's congressional districts, if we can just mobilize them. Once elected, our lawmakers will use America's celebrated political process to affect manifest change in our civil code. God is the author of all good and just law, and it follows that His Holy Word should drive legislation. The Bible's moral injunctions are there for good reason—they have underpinned effective societies for centuries—and the law of our land needs to reflect them.

Certainly, political lightning-rod issues like abortion and homosexuality will be the first to be put in order. That citizens of this nation under God be permitted to continue in such heinous crimes against virtue is anathema, and it obviously will not continue. But there is so much more than that to be done. To think that adultery—one of God's Ten Commandments!—continues rampant and unpunished is an affront to national morality. Extra-marital sex will land you in jail. And, naturally, so will premarital sex. Fornication infects and then corrodes a civilization, and it must be stopped. Only the power of the state, exercised by responsible, upstanding participants in the political process, can end this blight. Sodomy laws will be enforced, vices will be re-outlawed (what a crafty ploy of Satan to overturn prohibition), and your kids will be safely escorted to the county jail before they are allowed to continue their destructive sexually explorative behaviors. Hallelujah!

Change the courts. Once the legislature is re-aligned with the true Founder's intent, we will be in position to start changing the courts. Christian executives will appoint Christian jurors, and Christian legislators will confirm them. Then, whatever scraps of legal nonconformity remain will be tidied up by courts after God's own heart. And, of course, the courts will remain a bulwark against whatever futile legal challenges may arise.

Crush all opposition. With the government restored to alignment with the Giver of life, we will be in position finally to do away with those who oppose the will of God. Organized evildoers will, naturally, be given the opportunity to repent. Should the likes of the many pornographers, the ACLU, and this pernicious paper choose not to accept the gracious gift of redemption, they will simply never be heard from again. Think Gulag.

Rewrite school curriculum. Every morning in the classroom, compulsory reciting of the Pledge of Allegiance—replete with expanded language developing and strengthening our commitment to living out our great nation's destiny under God—will be followed by the Ten Commandments and John 3:16. Bible study classes will be mandatory. History will be re-re-written to tell the true story of our nation's godly heritage.

Establish religious police. A sort of righteous Gestapo will be necessary, of course, to maintain national purity. Rest easy, parents: these well-trained servants of the King will discreetly follow your teenagers on prom night, so as to ensure there never even approaches a chastity infraction. This moral constabulary will likely find it most effective in deterring immorality to institute public corporal punishment. So, you womanizers, liars, and coveters, reform your iniquitous ways or expect to face judgment day. One usually has to be flogged in the public square only once to embrace the law's teaching value.

Create institutions for re-education. For their own reformation, and to maintain civil purity, such egregious offenders as homosexuals will be institutionalized. There they will be re-educated, evangelized, and kept from harming themselves and others.

There, I said it. All the sly, cunning liberal minds who have caught on to our surreptitious designs were right. We want a theocracy. Just close your eyes and picture the utopia.

Rob Brendle is Associate Pastor of NEW LIFE CHURCH, the largest evangelical mega-church in the state of Colorado. A respected man in the conservative area of Colorado Springs (home to NORAD Command, Peterson Air Force Base, Fort Carson Army Base, and the Air Force Academy), his influence in the community is rather substantial. It has been reported that President George W. Bush makes the occasional call to NEW LIFE CHURCH, and recent acts of evangelical proselytizing and harassment within the Air Force Academy have landed NEW LIFE CHURCH in the center of a scandalous spotlight. To read more about the Air Force Academy scandal, go to BBC News release “Religious bullying at US academy” at http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/americas/4091956.stm. Rob Brendle of NEW LIFE CHURCH can be reached at rbrendle@newlifechurch.org.

-Courtesy of The Toilet Paper (Soul Search #8, Vision for America) www.toiletpaperonline.com.

ELI CAME BACK FROM IRAQ

2006-02-06T12:36:00.000-05:00

I recently recieved this amazing poem, written by Andrea Gibson, about a mother and her son--a combat medic who's served in Iraq. Its a great piece of work and should be shared by all.

Eli came back from Iraq
and tattooed a teddy bear onto the inside of his wrist
above that a medic with an IV bag
above that an angel
but Eli says the teddy bear won’t live

and I know I don’t know but I say “I know”
because Eli’s only 24 and I’ve never seen eyes
further away from childhood than his
eyes old with a wisdom
he knows I’d rather not have

Eli’s mother traces a teddy bear onto my arm
and says not all casualties come home in body bags

and I swear
I’d spend the rest of my life writing nothing
but the word light at the end of this tunnel
if I could find the fucking tunnel
I’d write nothing but white flags
somebody pray for the soldiers
somebody pray for what’s lost
somebody pray for the mailbox
that holds the official letters
to the mothers, fathers, sisters and little brothers
of Micheal 19...Steven 21...John 33
how ironic that their deaths sound like bible verses
the hearse is parked in the halls of the high school
recruiting black brown and poor
while anti-war activists outside walter reed army hospital
scream 100, 000 slain…
as an amputee on the third floor
breathes forget-me-nots onto the window pain

but can we forget what we never knew

our sky is so perfectly blue its repulsive
somebody tell me where god lives
cause if god is truth
god doesn’t live here
our lies have seared the sun too hot live by
there are ghosts of people who are still alive
touting M16s with trembling hands
while we dream ourselves stars on Survivor
another missile sets fire to the face in the locket
of a mother who’s son
needed money for college
and she swears she can feel his photograph burn

how many wars will it take us to learn
that only the dead return
the rest remain forever caught between worlds of
shrapnel shatters body of three year old girl!
and…
welcome to McDonalds can I take your order?
the mortar of sanity crumbling
stumbling back home to a home that will never be home again
Eli doesn’t know if he can ever write a poem again
1 third of the homeless men in this country are veterans
and we have the nerve to “Support Our Troops”
with pretty yellow ribbons
while giving nothing but dirty looks to their outstretched hands
tell me what land of the free
sets free its 18 year old kids into greedy war zones
hones them like missiles
then returns their bones in the middle of the night
so know one can see
their deaths swept beneath the carpet and hidden like dirt
their lives promises we never kept

Jeff Lacey came back from Iraq
and hung himself in his parents basement with a garden hose
the night before he died he spent forty five minutes on his fathers lap
rocking like a baby
rocking like daddy save me!
and don’t think for a minute he too isn’t collateral damage
in the mansions of Washington
they are watching them burn and hoarding the water
no senators sons are being sent out to slaughter
no president’s daughters are licking ashes from their lips
or dreaming up ropes to wrap around their necks
in case they ever make it home alive
our eyes are closed america
there are souls in the boots of the soldiers america
fuck your yellow ribbon
you want to support our troops
bring them home
and hold them tight when they get here

Written by Andrea Gibson January 2006

A.C.A.B.

2006-02-03T08:54:00.000-05:00

There are two type of people in this world. Beatles Fans and Elvis Fans, morning people and night owls, and people that would become COPS and people that don't.

When I was a child I used to look up to and respect cops. They were "a person in my neighborhood" and I was naive. They all were as wholesome as white bread and I thought they all were like CHIPS and beat up bad guys.

As I grew into my teenage years, started drinking the booze and getting high, I became afraid of them. I would break into a sweat if a police car pulled up next to me at a red light. I would get clumsy and flustered around them. I made awkward attempts to act natural.

Now after years of being fucked over by my share of pig fuck cops I have grown to view them as my enemy. I see a cop and I lock eye contact. He is the one to look away now. No god damn quarter. I want to slam my clinched fist in their fucking mirror shades.

I have seen police after the scene standing around their cars sharing high fives and having a laugh over the way they took down a drunk bumb with their night sticks or kicked the shit out of the gang banger because he needed to learn a lesson.

Even the cops that try to do right have bad days. And, if they encounter a kid with a sack a weed who is having a bad day, guess who wins? The power tripping cop that's who. The cops that cuts you a break turns around and fucks over some one else. It is sheer human nature and the donut shop social circle breeds it into new officers. Absolute power corupts.

And, the corruption in the force runs rampant and the good cop is extinct. No one joins the men in blue for reasons of righteousness anymore. People become police men because they want the power, need the job or can’t fucking do anything else but be some dumb fuck machismo bully.

And shave off those stupid Hitler mustaches you shit eating Nazis.

Get well Elio Carrion

and then get revenge.

the heretic

link to the video http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=8907384305326268846&q=cop+shooting

UP AGAINST THE WALL!

2006-02-02T23:56:00.000-05:00

Everyone else seems to have something to say about George W. Bush’s State of the Union address, so why not me? I’m not going to delve too much into it for the simple reason that it was dreadfully boring, hopelessly ridiculous, and seemed to resemble more of a high school pep rally than it did an act of government. Not even the spineless democrats (who couldn’t even manage to filibuster Samuel Alito this week) could add flavor to the charade when sarcastically cheering against Bush’s social security privatization plan. Interesting though it was, I find it impossible to give even a little credit to the better half of a pathetic one-party system.

Bush said nothing he can actually back up in reality, nor does he have the track record to make him believable in any fashion.

“War in Iraq: Necessary and winnable”—despite his own generals on the ground, pentagon officials, 58% of the US population, and even the RAND Corporation claiming the exact opposite.

“The United States has a bolstering economy”-- although his presidency stands for an ever widening gap between the ultra rich and hopelessly poor, a record setting deficit and unemployment, and conniving tax cuts for the rich.

“Education is key for global market competition”--except that his No Child Left Behind program is a horrible failure for schools across the nation, not to mention the $12.7 billion cut from college student loans.

He claims that the environment weighs heavily on his pea-brained mind, but has never signed the Kyoto agreement for cleaner air and gleefully wishes to begin drilling for fossil fuels in Alaska and our beautiful national parks.

Despite his ignorance and dishonesty, everybody cheered and applauded their hearts out after he left his podium, gave a cute little wink to his dark overlord Cheney, and marched off into the crowd for handshakes and sloppy kisses to admiring bimbos. Head held high, he calculatedly cowed an American population through his typical mundane rhetoric, lies, and propaganda.

I could almost imagine the typical Bush fan commentating from behind his premium cable television set at home… “Yeah George, you tell ‘em! We’re at War! WAAAAR!! We’ll show them goddamned ragheads and Jesus hatin’ Bleedin’ Hearts and all them faggits and homos and spanglish speak’n Mex-ee-cans, foul’n up our economy, I saay shoot’em at the border......Goddamnit woman shut them snot-nosed brats up or I’ll beat the hell outta all y’all.....and get me another Bud’ while yer at it!!”

The State of Dysfunction address was a colorful display of brainwashing that would make Joseph Goebbels blush. And I’m sure Pappy George was sitting in his CIA protected mansion just proud as hell that George Jr. was perpetuating his New World Order scheme into an actual reality.

The only interesting news that came out of that dark and dismal night was the fact that Cindy Sheehan got arrested. It came across to the public something like this, “…and antiwar activist Cindy Sheehan, who’s son was killed in Iraq in 2003, was arrested by Capitol police officers at George Bush’s State of the Union address for allegedly wearing an offensive t-shirt. She was charged with unlawful conduct and later released.”

What the hell did they say? Unlawful conduct? Wearing a t-shirt? What exactly was going on there?

While taking her seat just prior to Bush’s speech, Cindy Sheehan was spotted by Capitol Police wearing a shirt that said, “2245 Dead. How many more?” An officer shouted, “Protester,” and Cindy was escorted out of the Capitol Building in handcuffs. Rep. Bill Young’s wife Beverly Young was wearing a “Support the Troops” t-shirt and was also asked to leave the event, but not arrested. Sheehan was then taken to the local cop-shop to be charged with the misdemeanor “unlawful conduct” and later released.

Many claim that she was out of line and deserved the arrest. While it is true that there are laws prohibiting political protesting on capital grounds, the exact statutes are incredibly vague and do not outline what the law considers “protesting”. There has been much confusion in relation to this incident. The Associated Press wrote, “The two women appeared to have offended tradition if not the law, according to several law enforcement and congressional officials.”

Offended tradition? Does that make it illegal? Well, in all fairness, apparently not. Capitol Police Chief Terrance Gainer announced today that the charges against Cindy Sheehan were to be dropped. This came to light only after Cindy Sheehan threatened to sue the district for infringing on her civil liberties and consequently the entire story of her arrest was made public.

What is ironic about this particular Sheehan scandal is that it completely foreshadowed the bullshit that George W. Bush spouted out in his State of the Union address. Bush rambled on and on about how important “Freedom” and “Democracy” was to Iraq and the Middle East, all the while trampling on the freedoms and democracy of Americans at home. The funniest part was that Sheehan didn’t even mean to get arrested, unlike other times when she purposely confronted officers. No! This time Cindy Sheehan was arrested and booked for a THOUGHT CRIME!

What does this say about our State of the Union in 2006? If you can be arrested for wearing a t-shirt, does that mean you can be locked up for looking like a hippy? Soviet communists arrested kids wearing blue jeans and young men with long hair because…The Soviet Union was not free! Everybody knows that. But when you consider the facts of state oppression, it seems funny how much that level of injustice compares to what Americans are faced with today.

Cindy Sheehan’s arrest is not an isolated incident. I have friends who were arrested at antiwar protests because they looked like anarchist punks. At the Republican National Convention in 2004, similar wrongful arrests were made during peaceful demonstrations. In those instances, heavily armed police officers forced peaceful citizens into small boundaries constructed out of tape and barriers. They called these boundaries “Free Speech Zones”. Violators of these free speech corrals were arrested and thrown into dirty jail cells overnight, only to be charged with misdemeanor crimes upon their release. Worse yet, innocent protestors, punks, squatters, and other “undesirables” were detained at the 2004 RNC protest and locked up--without charge--in what was called Pier 57, a warehouse insulated with asbestos and guarded by armed police and razor wire. Most of the over 1900 detainees reported that they were held in filthy conditions and denied water and medical attention during their 18+ hour imprisonment. Why were these people arrested in the first place? Were they guilty of violent crimes or inciting riots? Were these people endangering themselves or others around them? Were these people terrorists? Certainly not! These were American citizens who should have been protected by the Constitution of the United States, and this was the price they paid for exercising their Civil Rights!

Bill of Rights
Amendment I
Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the government for a redress of grievances.

No infringement on these rights deserves to be ignored. It just so happens that some injustices are made more public than others. Cindy Sheehan may harbor radical ideas about the war or the government, but in no way should she deserve imprisonment for speaking her mind. Besides, doesn’t the question on her t-shirt deserve this respect? Whether you support the war or are against it, doesn’t the fact that 2,245 American soldiers have died even register a tiny shred of consciousness on your mind? Certainly no one could argue that her question is fair, whether you like the subject or not. The question speaks truth, and in this case, the truth does hurt.

All in all, I would say that the evening of the State of the Union address was a good one. It was filled with all the ups and downs and excitement that you can only watch on American television. We got to sit back and watch G’Dubya look like the lying, hypocritical bastard that we’ve all grown to know and love. We saw the Democratic Party doing what they do best: Sitting on their worthless asses, sulking, and doing nothing. Together we learned the valuable lesson that anyone who disagrees with the de facto regime is a “Defeatist” and should cower in shame. And to top it off, Cindy Sheehan was arrested by the Fashion Police and ironically martyred by the very forces of evil and corruption that she stands to oppose.
By being persecuted for speaking out, Cindy Sheehan now represents The Cause against a growing danger in our country: A fascist police state ruled by a power-mongering tormenter with no tolerance for honest dissent and no regard for constitutional rights. Sure there are people who hate her because she’s a peace-freak and opposes the war that needlessly took her son’s life. But no one who believes in the principles of freedom and democracy can argue that she was wrongfully arrested, no matter who apologized after the fact. In a hip-hop, glamorized society of spectacle, Cindy Sheehan is the new “in”. Just by wearing a controversial t-shirt to the State of the Union, she managed to build a reputation far more dangerous than gangsta’rap. In the end, Cindy Sheehan has more Street-Cred than the Bush administration has moral integrity.

--
hEkLe

See you in Hell Douglas Barber

2006-01-23T02:15:00.002-05:00

Raise a glass to Douglas Barber, he finally lost his battle almost two years after his tour in the kitty litter. The cops even got dash cam of him chewing on a shot gun. Guess Alabama’s finest didn’t comply with suicide by cop. Doug did an about face with a snap and went out in style.

Should we bother keeping the score after regulation? Is that one up for the insurgents or one for the US? It feels like I never picked a side and everyone is against me. Douglas must have figured shit was stacked against him. You can’t fend off Ali Baba awake and asleep for the rest of your life.

Sounds to me that Barber got the shaft on the way out the door. Went a little batty after getting his boots on the ground here in the real world. The board diagnosed him with Personality Disorder instead of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. You see if they write in Personality Disorder, Adjustment, or Anxiety Disorder, they claim that your mental illness was a condition you had previous to going to war. Saves some tax payer money and the government isn’t liable. Despite the fact that, the twenty odd years you lived before service you were fine, when you entered into the service and went to your medical/psychological physical at MEPS you were a GO, and even the days right prior to going to war you checked out okay when you did a pre-deployment evaluation. But apparently, you are so fucking nuts and always have been that you have some severe mental illness making you unfit for most civilian deployment.

So here you are unemployed and not sleeping. You drink yourself to sleep when you can’t afford medicine because you haven’t gotten the disability write off for having PTSD. You jump at every loud noise (jack hammers sound embarrassingly close to heavy machine gun fire) and you have anxiety attacks on every date when you enter a crowded restaurant or bar. It doesn’t take long to say “FUCK IT!” when you keep coming back to the VA clinic and they give you the run around or they pile a shit load of bureaucracy on your ass. Or worse, they call bull shit and humiliate you.

It all gets drastically worse when you realize that your sacrifice is denied meaning. We don’t have a Pearl Harbor or an Auschwitz to justify our combat experience. The verdict is coming barreling down the pipe”WRONG FUCKING WAR!” Sorry boys. Looks like we made a big god damn mistake. You wanna cry democracy in Iraq and the war on terror, shove it up your ass and sit down because here comes the bad news,,,,YOU ARE WRONG!

Barber fights the courts for a year and a half to change his diagnosis, and when he finally does win and he switches to the good drugs the VA mails out in big shiny bottles, he starts popping em down like a starving child. When he misses appointment after appointment at the clinic where is the concerned case worker checking out if everything is on the level at the Barber house? Sorry again, the VA is to under staffed to even see the folks in the waiting room who have been there for six hours much less have any accountability to struggling vets to sketched out to leave their houses.

I have only pieces of Douglas Barber’s story, but I assure you it will be out in full soon. It will bounce around concerned circles, somewhere in the middle of the news paper. The institution will report that things are getting better and all the citizen zombies will nod and go back to eating brains and watching tv. No real changes will take place and the veterans will continue to suffer. We will become desensitized to stories of veteran suicides and the journalists will all say “We just did an article on that, so we aren’t interested in another.” and Americans will lose sight of the issue until it happens to the neighbor’s son or Cousin Joe Bob. We don’t have the attention span to really care about each other and it is always someone else’s problem.

So slap a yellow ribbon on your SUV and don’t cry foul when some drunk vet comes slamming into your wagon killing your kids or a desperate homeless war hero is knocking over the liquor store and guns down grandma, because he thinks he is putting forty out of forty in the black of an insurgent silhouette.

And don’t point fingers if recruiting is down. You convince a kid to go into the war machine when he sees vets coming out the other end in coffins, wheel chairs, and straight jackets. People might not be spitting in the faces of the veterans of the Iraq and Afghanistan War, but they may as well be pissing on us. If apathetic America is to busy drinking Star Bucks and shopping at Wal-Mart to notice there is a big problem with the Vets and this whole War On Terror then this whole country has it’s neck in the slaughter stock waiting for the blade to fall.

To Douglas and all the dead soldiers and dying vets, keep a pot of coffee on. We will all see you in hell soon enough.

The Heretic

Douglas Barbers suicide note
http://groups.google.com/group/coalitionforfreethoughtinmedia/msg/339447f2ecaef4db

Douglas Barber's Blog "Soldier For Truth"
http://soldierfortrhth.blogspot.com/

2006-01-14T10:58:00.000-05:00

People often ask me, “If you are so against the war and couldn’t stand the army, why did you ever join in the first place?” I have answered the same every time, that perhaps I was naïve, that I wanted a chance to see the world and earn college money. Or that I felt trapped in a dead-end town and needed a chance to escape, or that I was curious to live life as a soldier and gain military knowledge. These answers are never enough for some people, yet so many young Americans end up in the military the same exact way.

I understand that I joined just prior to September 11, 2001. Indeed, I was naïve then to think that we lived in a somewhat peaceful world. Soldiers at that time joined for other reasons. Maybe soldiers who join now are ones who want to fight in a war. After much personal debate, I have learned that my resistance to war and empire was forged by the army itself. Since the very beginning of my four year military experience, I was simply a very different soldier.

In basic training, instead of attending church service with the rest of the privates for two hours of relaxation, I was in the barracks mopping the floors and cleaning toilets. I would not fake a belief in god for petty rewards.

While other soldiers were marching in rank and file to eat chow, I was off to the side, being smoked by a drill sergeant--doing pushups and flutter-kicks--for refusing to yell out cadence like a dopey high school cheerleader.

As time went by, it never got any easier. I had a very hard time with the concept of conformity.

While other soldiers in the barracks were watching porno’s and hitting the beer bong with their frat-buddies, I was sitting on my bunk in a dark corner of a room reading Noam Chomsky.

Instead of spending endless hours spit-shining my boots or ironing my BDU’s, I was playing punk riffs on my guitar or perhaps writing poetry.

I would routinely skip out on company “mandatory fun days” and go back to my room and sleep. Beetle Bailey was my hero.

Instead of spending every weekend going to the same mundane hip-hop clubs and discos, starting fights and trying to get laid, I was backpacking across Europe with other like-minded friends. We traveled way beyond the limits that a mileage pass would allow. We were openly learning about other cultures, exploring a great unknown, and living life to the fullest while we had it.

Instead of hating Iraqis for their strange ways and resentful behavior, I was trying to imagine the world in which they lived, even before an unwelcome US occupation forced them to live in a war zone.

While other soldiers were bragging about how many hajis they had waxed in the last engagement, I was carefully pondering what the longtime ramifications would be for such inane bloodshed.

Instead of coming back from missions and going straight to the PlayStation, I was writing what I saw and how I felt on this blog.

It is true that I was a very different breed in the army. However, there were others like me. We were far and few between, we were misfits in an olive-drab green hell. We solidified, became friends, and became brothers. Most of the soldiers in my platoon were this way, outcasts. We opposed the war, sometimes openly. We were never persecuted for our beliefs because, although we were angry, we were a whole. We were a group of covert-subverts and our chain of command hated it.

I came home from Iraq and was awarded combat spurs, a glorious achievement for a cavalry scout. I contemplated the true meaning of these spurs, this icon of war. Spurs that were worn by soldiers on horses; who rode with General Custer and decimated the American Indian population. Spurs painted with the blood of five major wars of the 20th century, some wars to fight empire and others to promote it. What would I do with these spurs? I decided to hold on to them. They meant much more than archaic tradition and a turbulent history. Somehow they meant comradery and friendship. My brothers-in-arms and I had earned them together, and they symbolize a token of deep understanding of a past we will share together, until the day we die.

Today’s public thinks that every American soldier fighting in Iraq supports the war and that his/her morale and trust in command is very high. However, in my experience, this was simply not true. I encountered dissent on many levels (For one example, see post below: Free Speech for Soldiers, Sept.21, 2004). Even soldiers who supported the army and loved their job hated being in a conflict they could not understand. Some soldiers did understand, and were resentful for it. The morale for the majority of our brigade was relatively low. I rarely met anyone who wanted to fight in Iraq, and the only ones who truly wanted to stay were the high echelon officers who seemed more concerned about their careers than the overall mission.

Some may wonder where these disgruntled soldiers are. I believe that they are a part of every social fabric of our country. I’ve certainly met more angry veterans than I have boastful ones. Some missing limbs, some missing friends, others missing innocence. Angry and confused. Cannot find the healthcare they need. Cannot find jobs. Can no longer find a place to fit in our society.

Some of these soldiers are still in the military and fear repercussions of speaking out. Soldiers who served several missions in Iraq and want no more. Soldiers tied to the war machine with no hope of escape. They wait for their day of freedom, hoping to avoid another stop-loss. They want out before death takes them first.

So many silent voices and whispered stories. I know one veteran who refuses to talk about his experience because he thinks no one will understand and it won’t change anything anyways. Another veteran I know candy-coats his experience so he won’t disappoint his conservative family members. These soldiers are everywhere, but choose to remain silent because they fear ostracism from a war crazed, jingoistic public. The media plays with everyone’s mind, convincing everyone that everything is okay as long as you trust in the government’s overall plans for victory in Iraq. But when one asks a veteran for the truth, this optimistic fairy tale of ultimate victory seems a hard pill to swallow.

I am not trying to speak for every soldier and veteran. I know that there are those out there who support the war effort and feel good about being in Iraq. However, in my experience, I have not met too many who feel this way. There is a rising tide of antiwar sentiments growing in this country. Fifty-two percent of America now feels it was not worth going to war with Iraq, while fifty-eight percent disapprove of Bush’s handling of the war, and now a whopping fifty-three percent actually support a Bush impeachment. (CNN/USA Today/Gallup Poll/Zogby Poll. Jan. 6-8, 2006). One would have to wonder how these polls might look if more and more soldier accounts were brought to the public’s attention. There is a truth that lies buried under the Pentagon propaganda machine and the misinformation provided by corporate media and a dishonest administration, and that truth lies in the experience of combat soldiers.

In the end I know that my experience may have been different, or that maybe I was a very different kind of soldier. But it was the army that molded my contempt for authority and distrust of a feudalistic government that pulls the strings. Through my army involvement I met others like me who felt much of the same way. We were dissidents, but never un-American. On the contrary, we knew the difference between following orders and thinking for ourselves. Ultimately, there is no difference between love for one’s country and the willingness to oppose a government that institutes war, fear and oppression on any level. There are many soldiers and veterans who share the same feelings as me and others I met along the way. Some are even in the ranks of the military. Someday all the soldiers will come home and when they do, their stories and sentiments will follow. Only then will a better understanding of the truth be known.

--
J.D. Englehart

We Owe Veterans and Soldiers the Truth

2006-01-09T15:13:00.000-05:00

The German winter was in high gear as the Scouts of 2-63rd Armor Battalion crossed the tarmac to an awaiting plane. We were wearing our newly issued desert uniforms and carried almost all the necessary gear to survive one year in hostile Iraq. Other than an occasional joke most of us were deep in thought. I shifted from images of the people I loved and the luxuries I knew would soon be few and far between. Mostly I thought about the mission ahead, all the “what if scenarios” and the exercises we covered in training. I knew why we were supposed to be going to Iraq. I was going to fight terrorists that blew up the world trade center. I was going to put an end to a tyrannical regime to free a country. And, I was going to keep America, my family and friends, safe from biological, chemical and nuclear attack. The drone of the aircraft and the dull cabin lights soon put me into an easy sleep.

It has not been a year since I have left the combat zone and sleep no longer comes so easy. I am anxious and thoughts of my fellow soldiers struggling with injuries and mental illness keep me awake. My actions and experiences of war plague my dreams. I have seen veterans with missing limbs, paralyzed bodies, and disfigured appearances overcome their disabilities. However, something still interferes with our healing, the fact that we were betrayed and used abusively by our administration. The fact that we sacrificed and now suffer for ulterior motives by our own leaders hurts far greater than the visible wounds. However, our sacrifice need not be in vain.

If a lesson can be learned from the Iraq War, a lesson that should have been learned from the war in Vietnam, it is that we can not allow our president the ability to wage war without the will of the people and the support of the entire government. We have to apply stronger checks and balances and enforce the existing procedures. The only way that we will encourage change is to hold the administration accountable for its’ fraudulent lead up to the Iraq War. There must be an impeachment trail against George W. Bush and his staff.

I hear people comment that we need to concentrate on withdraw strategies and the problem at hand and the reasons for going to war is a mote point. It does however matter to those of us who made the sacrifice and did our duty as was asked of us. We were the strong arm of a democracy, and should have been used responsibly to accomplish the needs of our citizens. There seems to be enough evidence to support a doubt that the war was based on deceit. An investigation for impeachment is the only justified course of action.

the heretic

Winners and Losers

2005-12-13T20:19:00.000-05:00

The more I reflect back to my service in the military and my deployment in Iraq a bad taste forms in my mouth. I am beginning to realize that I was an active component in the fundamental lose of the Iraq War or (Bush’s War). I took part in the occupation during Iraq’s most fragile hour. In the year I was in Iraq I witnessed the rise of the insurgency in April 04’, the scandal at Abu Ghraib break open, false sovereignty handed over, the re-election of George W. Bush, the second battle of Fallujah, and a mockery of an election in Iraq. All these events were tipping points in a war where the US soldier lost the trust and support of the Iraq people.

Through the use of conventional war against a guerilla insurgency and abusive tactics we turned the communities, we were supposed to be bringing democracy to, into terrorized anti-Americanists. We can not win the hearts and minds with shock and awe and shake and bake. I watched as the undecided Iraqi civilians still sitting on the fence started to side with the rebels. It became harder to get information from the friendlys and the insurgents found safe havens in many more Iraqi homes and mosques. There was a growing animosity between the Iraqi people and the US soldier.

Terms like “Rag Head” and “Sand Nigger” were used more frequently. The name Haji became the “Gook” and “Skinny” of the Iraq War. An honorary term the Muslim uses for a man who completes the Islamic pilgrimage, now a derogatory remark by the GI. Bags went over anyone’s head who was eighteen and older and didn’t give us full cooperation when we raided houses and search vehicles at check points. People started to disappear from neighborhoods and ended up as enemy prisoners of war. With little to no records of who they were and why they were detained, these prisoners were assumed to be the most violent of insurgents and treated with very few rights. A bigot’s war had escalated.

As we begin to withdraw troops we are going to pressure the ill prepared Iraq security forces to step up. The death squads will get more brutal as we approve of hard line tactics that decrease US soldier casualties. Mean while the Iraq civilian population will suffer under extreme and unchecked militias. We will increase our air campaign allowing Iraq Army officers to coordinate targets. Often these will be to resolve personal vendettas and attack opposing political personalities. The US Armed Forces will become an instrument for the power plays and attempted genocides that are beginning to over take Iraq’s troubled areas. The innocent Iraqi people will be caught in the middle.

The damage done by this war to peace in the middle-east and the security of the world is so vast I am not sure if anyone has the answers. But, here is my attempt to add some reason to this tragedy. We must realize that as Americans we do not know what is best for anyone and to assume we have the world’s solutions is fairly arrogant. The best we could do is try harder to understand and listen to the Iraq people instead of forcing them into a mold we believe is best for all mankind.

One aspect that is long over due is the fact we should begin to treat the insurgency as a legitimate military force and create an environment were we can negotiate with the primary leaders. Possibly even, compromising areas to allow insurgents to become an institutional part of the security forces in those sectors. This might offer a safer region in the long run for the civilians there and will force the insurgents to take active roles in the political procedures.

We should shift the aggressive conventional operations into peace keeping efforts that concentrate on missions that reduce criminal activity and protect the Iraqi people. Flood areas of Iraq with civil affairs projects and non-profit work in order to rebuild communities from the ground up. Improve the standard of living so the Iraq people start to trust America is going to deliver on our promises. Create jobs so that Iraqis can start helping themselves. If the Iraqi is providing for his family he will be to busy and content to join the rebellion and his children will be less susceptible to joining extremists.

A lot of the strategies to win the war in Iraq rely on one major factor, we must have an honest foreign policy that is transparent to the global community. This is a tangled mess when we take a hard look at why we entered Iraq in the first place and who’s definition we are using as to what success truly is in the region.

To the American people winning in Iraq should be defined as gaining security from terrorists and building stability in the Middle-East. These can be achieved be satisfying the impoverished nations by having American corporations becoming less dependent on out sourced labor and by abusing countries to capitalize on their resources. We will be at war with the third world until we manage to keep our business to ourselves.

The largest problem that applies here is the control of oil. It is time to confess to ourselves and the world that the consumption of oil by the US is dependent on the Middle-Eastern oil fields. We will soon have to face up the fact that we require a certain amount of these resources until we have developed alternatives and negotiate terms with the rest of the world. We have known since the Carter Doctrine, and it was further proved in the Bush Doctrine, that we would be willing to go to war to insure we had access to the oil resources in South West Asia. So it is about time we start working on a way to get the oil while we with draw troops or else in a few years we are going to have Iraq War II Vets, Iran War Vets, Syria War Vets, and Saudi War Vets.

These are my views on the current situation. I can’t say that I am right on all these accounts. I just added my personal experience with the knowledge I have gained about these issues. Having the prospective on the ground allows me to understand how these plans and strategies will likely play out. I am fairly depressed about the direction we are going and I don’t think we are doing what is best for anyone but a few individuals.

I hear Murtha getting slammed for being afraid to stay the course, but isn’t it fear that we also attempt to win over Iraq? It is hard to tell who is right when we neither side can see the future. The best plan is to set conditions to with draw and bench marks to initiate more of the exit strategy. But, also we must be flexible to adapt to current events and adjust the operations on the fly if the plan seems to fail. I don’t think sticking to one stubborn solution will get our troops out of harms way and supply Iraq with a safer environment. It is going to take a lot of compromising and our polarized America seems to be unable to do that. While we argue about what is best, my brothers and sisters die in Iraq.

the heretic