AdoptUsKids blog

share special ideas that may help other families

2008-07-02T08:51:00.000-04:00

Can you please share your foster or adoptive family story with us? Other families who are waiting could be greatly encouraged to hear from you. Please don’t include identifying details but you can name your state/county/agency at your discretion.

Share special ideas that may help other families. It would be helpful for you to offer tips and advice too. For example: Do you have children with specific challenges? Is your family culturally diverse? What experiences led you to adopt?

If you have time, read the comments that are posted on the blog. So many families are ready to give up on adoption because they are discouraged and disillusioned. Hopefully your family “success” story can give them the hope they need to continue in the process.

Contact AdoptUsKids at 1-888-200-4055 if you need support and assistance.

AdoptUsKids has a blog for our Latino families

2008-06-16T10:18:00.003-04:00

This is exciting news! AdoptUsKids now has a blog especially for Latino families.
Adopte1.blogspot.com is directed at answering the foster care and adoption questions of Spanish-speaking families. Resources and support are available…so check it out and refer your friends!

To check out the blog:

1) Go to adopte1.blogspot.com (you don't need to register or be a member)

2) Click on the posting that interests you

3) Scroll to the bottom and click on the 'post a comment' link

4) Type your comment

5) Click on the 'publish your comment' button

Adopte1.blogspot.com is moderated by Carmen Hernandez, the AdoptUsKids Latino Family Recruiter and Youth Coordinator.

adoption stability and adoption disruption

2008-06-03T20:21:00.001-04:00

Research has indicated that certain child and family characteristics appear to be associated with adoption stability and adoption disruption. Adoption disruption occurs when a child leaves the adoptive family before the adoption is finalized.

• Most adoptions do not disrupt. In fact, over 80 percent of all adoptive placements remain intact.
• Adoptions are more stable when parents are tolerant of a wide range of behaviors and have flexible and realistic aspirations for their children.
• Adoptions by single parents are no more likely to disrupt than adoptions by two parents, even when single parents adopt older children.
• The fact that both parents work outside of the home seems to have no effect on disruption rates.
• There appears to be no relationship between adoption disruption and the size of the family or the parents’ fertility history.

Children whose adoptions have disrupted have gone on to be successfully adopted by other families, and families who have experienced a disruption have successfully adopted other children. It is clear that adoption disruption should not be used to screen out families who have been approved or to screen out children as candidates for adoption.

the child you feel prepared to parent

2008-06-03T20:15:00.003-04:00

Part of the homestudy process involves establishing criteria for the children you feel prepared to parent. Traits that have been considered for matching children with families include abilities such as musical or athletic talent and general interests such as reading or sports. It’s important to point out that many birth children do not share the interests and talents of their parents, and that birth siblings, although often sharing some common interests and talents, have talents and interests of their own. Many adoption professionals state that personality is the most important area on which to focus in determining a good fit between children and families. Common interests often are a bridge to developing a relationship between a parent and a child. Many adoptive parents, however, note that children are ever changing and that parents need to be prepared to adapt to their child’s emerging personality and changing interests. Parents’ commitment to parenting is most important.

Because children enter foster care on an emergency basis, they are often placed with foster families on the basis of availability rather than on the basis of a careful assessment. Many foster parents open their homes to children whom they did not originally envision fostering. And, many of these foster families go on to adopt children who would not have been a “match” based on the foster parents’ initial thoughts about the children who would be a “good fit” with their families.

What child would best fit into your family? Consider the following:

• A child who is older than any of the current children in the family may be successfully added to a family.
• A child can be placed successfully with families who already have another child of the same age.
• A child often can be integrated into a large family as well as a smaller family.
• Adoptive parents who have a child with special needs may be able to handle another child who may or may not have special needs.

I encourage you to use broad parameters when making the decision about what child will join your family through adoption but don’t stretch beyond what you honesty believe you can handle.

your past challenges can benefit your family's future

2008-06-03T14:46:00.005-04:00

Sometimes what you consider a hindrance to adoption may actually be a benefit! Don’t be afraid to share with your caseworker and include in your homestudy the challenges that you have faced. Look what research has shown:

• Families who have experienced challenges in their lives and have handled them successfully are often just the right people to adopt waiting children!

• Families without a lot of parenting experience can parent successfully.

• Working outside the home should not be seen as a deterrent to being good adoptive or foster parents.

• Families coming from all different backgrounds (social, economic) make good adoptive and foster parents.

• Out-of-state families can be good resources for children. These families can maintain contact with former foster families and other relatives of the child despite distance.

• Medical problems, disabilities, and obesity do not necessarily interfere with parenting abilities.

• Parents who are recovering alcoholics or recovering drug addicts and who have been in recovery for a period of time can be effective parents.

• Effective parenting is not dependent on one’s marital status (nor on religious affiliation, financial status, or where the family lives).

If you have questions about what should be included in your homestudy visit adoptuskids.org or call 1-888-200-4005

May is National Foster Care Month

2008-05-02T11:26:00.000-04:00

May is National Foster Care Month

There are currently 510,000 children in the United States foster care system. In addition, there are an estimated 12 million alumni of foster care in the U.S. from all walks of life.

No matter their age, all youth in foster care need a meaningful connection to a caring adult who becomes a supportive and lasting presence in their lives. Without families or stable relationships, too many of these formerly abused and neglected children and teens will face life’s challenges all alone.

Visit the National Foster Care Month website at fostercaremonth.org, which features:

• Information about foster care
• History of National Foster Care Month
• Success stories
• Ways to get involved
• Events and promotions

For additional information and other foster care resources, visit adoptuskids.org.

your family lives outside of the child’s state or county

2008-05-02T09:17:00.005-04:00

Who can you contact if a child’s worker says they will not consider a prospective adoptive family outside of the child’s state or county of residence?

If a child’s narrative does not indicate that the child has a preference about location, then families outside of that state or county must be considered in order for the public agency that holds guardianship of the child to be in compliance with federal law. If you are aware of a worker who is telling you s/he will not or cannot consider out-of-state families or who might be interested in receiving training or information on how to achieve interstate placements, call AdoptUsKids at 1-888-200-4005 with the child’s case number and tell us your story. When we talk to the worker, we can encourage the worker to move in the direction of considering out -of- state families. We’re glad to mediate and educate!

get more involved

2008-04-27T07:59:00.003-04:00

Want to become more involved in the adoption process and finding a child? Follow these steps!

Spread information about your interest in adopting - tell all your family members, your friends, your neighbors and your co-workers.

Reach out to agencies and adoption exchanges throughout the country – if you are interested in a child, contact the caseworker to introduce yourself.

Learn about the children featured on AdoptUsKids.org and similar state photolistings – read all you can to become prepared and knowledgeable.

Review your homestudy - it should describe your preparation, background, motivation, support circle, and relevant experience.

Keep notes on every child about whom you inquire - the date of the call, participants in the call, and substance of the conversation are all important.

Journal your feelings and experiences - children like to hear how they became part of their family; this journal will help you tell their story.

Make sure your caseworker sends out copies of your homestudy - if your worker says s/he's too busy, offer to come in and help.

Monitor the child’s photolisting even if you have not been matched - if the child is still waiting after three months or so, contact the worker again.

If you’d like to learn how to use AdoptUsKids.org to send inquiries to children’s workers and receive responses back from them, please call 1-888-200-4005 to talk to an AdoptUsKids Child and Family Advocate.

choosing an agency

2008-04-15T15:06:00.001-04:00

How do you know which agency to choose? Should you work with a public or private agency? Should you ever leave your agency? These are all important questions that can greatly affect the timeliness and efficiency of your adoption training and placement. Be sure the mission statement of the agency you choose reflects your beliefs about adoption and foster care. It's best to get all the available information that the agency can offer. Before you commit to an agency, ask the following:

What is the average time it will take for you to complete my Family Profile (Home Study)?
Once my Family Profile (Home Study) is complete, what is the average time it will take before a child will be placed in my home?
How long have you been working with families?
Are you familiar with the process of interstate adoption?
Do you offer adoptive parent support after placement?
Can I speak with families who have worked with this agency in the past?

If you are not pleased with your current agency, ask to meet with your caseworker. Explain your concerns. Make sure your expectations are realistic and within the scope of the agency's services. If necessary, ask to talk with the supervisor. Documentation is key: be sure to keep record of all the calls with date and with whom you spoke. Make copies of all the paperwork that has been submitted! If you decide that you need to begin work with another agency, request a copy of your family profile (aka Home Study) - including documentation of adoptive parent training- so that you can provide it to the new agency as a point of reference. Expect that your agency will give you a copy of your Family Profile (Home Study) or at least allow you to read it in the office! You may be able to avoid completing the formalities twice!

Don’t be afraid to advocate for yourself. Not every agency will be able to meet your needs. Find one that does!

Call 1-888-200-4005 or email info@adoptuskids.org or request to be connected to a Recruitment Response Team (RRT) in your state. The RRT will know about all of the agency options and help you pick the right one for you.

reward those who are helping

2008-04-11T20:52:00.005-04:00

It's been great sharing all the stories, questions and comments but sometimes knowing that others are facing your same obstacles can be disheartening. I know you often feel like giving up because you aren't finding the answers you need or the support that you are asking for from professionals. The Department of Health and Human Services is now accepting nominations for the 2008 Adoption Excellence Awards. It's a great opportunity to honor those who ARE making a positive difference in the lives of kids and families that are involved in the foster care and adoption processes. Can you think of someone deserving of this award? If we praise those who are doing things right, maybe others will follow their great example.

Look at these award categories (below) - they are the very issues we have been discussing!

Adoptions of Older Children
Inter-State Adoptions
Faith-Based Initiatives
Support for Adoptive Families
Judicial or Child Welfare System Improvement
Media/Public Awareness of Adoption from Foster Care

For more information about the awards and past recipients visit the Children’s Bureau website: http://www.acf.hhs.gov/programs/cb/current_initiatives/aeawards.htm.

adoption professionals are listening

2008-03-17T14:21:00.002-04:00

Did you know that each time you mention your state I notify the adoption program manager and recruitment response team in your state? Sometimes they respond on the blog and other times they email me clarifying state policy and law. Bringing your comments to the attention of the adoption professionals in your state is a great first step toward improving adoption and foster care practice! Thanks for all your advice and questions. Keep ‘em coming!

understanding adoption and foster care language

2008-03-03T12:17:00.002-05:00

Sometimes the lingo used by caseworkers can be confusing! The Child Welfare Information Gateway has an updated version of its glossary of child welfare terms which might be helpful to you. The glossary now includes definitions for more than 230 child welfare terms and common acronyms, as well as links to related terms and information on significant Federal legislation. The glossary is available online at: www.childwelfare.gov/admin/glossary . Check it out. If you still have questions about the information you are receiving from your agency or the child's caseworker, call us at 1-888-200-4005.

foster and adoptive parent support groups

2008-03-03T11:56:00.002-05:00

A parent support group provides a way for families to come together and learn from each other. Some parent support groups are involved in planning meetings, collecting and distributing clothing, organizing summer camps, and coordinating respite care. There are often presenters that come to the group meetings to discuss relevant topics that are of concern to the parents. Most importantly, parent support groups provide a reliable network for the adoptive and foster families. Every state has established parent support groups. AdoptUsKids has a nationwide list of the parent support groups that received a sponsorship from us. You can view it online at http://www.adoptuskids.org/. Consider joining a parent support group in your area. It just might surprise you to learn that other prospective parents have the same questions and concerns as you!

adoption tax credit

2008-02-28T13:11:00.002-05:00

You may be able to take a tax credit for expenses paid to adopt a child. The credit generally applies to the year the adoption is finalized in court. Obviously the adoption credit is not available for any expenses that have already been reimbursed to you by the agency or state. In addition to the credit, certain amounts reimbursed by your employer may qualify for an exclusion. For both the credit or the exclusion, qualifying expenses include adoption fees, court costs, attorney fees, traveling expenses (including amounts spent for meals and lodging while away from home), and other expenses directly related to the adoption of a child. Under certain circumstances, the amount of your qualified adoption expenses may be increased if you adopted a child with special needs. The credit and exclusion both have a dollar limit and an income limit.

If your adoption is finalized and you have questions about this tax credit, please contact us at 1-888-200-4005.

adoption subsidy

2008-02-15T12:44:00.001-05:00

If a child is described as having special needs (determined by these factors: ethnic background, age, part of a sibling group, medical conditions or physical, mental, or emotional disabilities) he may qualify for adoption assistance (also called "adoption subsidy"). This financial assistance is intended to help you provide for the child's ongoing therapy, treatment, or special support. There are two major funding sources for adoption assistance: the Federal title IV-E program under the Social Security Act and State specified programs. The amount of subsidy that you receive for caring for your child will be determined by the cost of living in the state that the child is coming from (the "placing state") and the level of the child's needs. There are three different types of subsidy. First (this is the one most often referenced when people speak of ‘subsidy’) is the monthly maintenance amount paid to the family. This monthly amount cannot be more than the foster care rate the child would qualify for in the placing state. The second type of subsidy is non-recurring expenses or one time only money for expenses related to the adoption. The cap on this is usually $2000 for each placement. The third type of subsidy is medical subsidy which includes a medical assistance card for the child and perhaps additional funds for extraordinary medical expenses. These subsidies are a great benefit for families but are not meant to cover all the expenses associated with raising a child. The specifics of each child’s placement will determine the subsidy amount.

If you have questions about adoption subsidy, please contact us at 1-888-200-4005.

foster care and adoption in your state

2008-02-14T10:34:00.004-05:00

You asked for it and we got it! We now have state-specific information on the next steps for adoption and foster care. It's on our website adoptuskids.org. Each of our state Recruitment Response Teams provided the information for their state - so we know it's accurate and current! To see this new feature on our site, click here:
http://www.adoptuskids.org/resourceCenter/rrtPackets/chooseState.aspx. If you have trouble accessing this interactive map, please call us at 1-888-200-4005.

Do you have any information about the licensing and homestudy process in your state? Tell us!

accessing information on adoptuskids.org

2008-02-13T15:57:00.002-05:00

Is your homestudy compete and current? Does it approve you to adopt children from U.S. foster care? Are you interested in children who are photolisted on AdoptUsKids.org? If you answered yes to all of these questions, you can register with AdoptUsKids.org to be able to contact children's case workers. To register, go to http://www.adoptuskids.org/family/FamilyCaseRegistration.aspx. Wait three business days after completing the website registration form. Then, come back to http://www.adoptuskids.org/ with your User ID and password and log in. Registered families who have logged in can view the contact information for children's workers and much more!

the child narrative and photo

2008-02-12T16:57:00.001-05:00

Sometimes you don't feel like enough information is written in a child's narrative. Here's why . . . the goal of a narrative (with photo) is to introduce the child, not tell the child’s entire story. Caseworkers must maintain a balance between confidentiality and disclosure when writing these narratives. The information that is on adoptuskids.org is written by those who have worked closely with the children they are describing. The narratives are intended to be a highlight of the child and do not contain every detail. These additional details and history are shared with you when you are matched with the child. In fact, full disclosure is legally required at that time. State and federal laws require that certain information be treated as confidential - a child’s last name, the name of his foster family, or the name of the group or residential placement facility where he is living should never be disclosed in a photolisting description. When done well, photolistings personalize the child through an engaging picture, an individualized description, and information on “next steps” for you - the potential adoptive family. Because photolistings reach the general public, they may generate the interest of several families - that is why you often wait to hear back from the caseworker. Always keep in mind that this information sharing is a process that occurs over time. Try to stay patient and positive!

If you have questions about a child's narrative that is listed on adoptuskids.org, call us at 1-888-200-4005.

open, semi-open, and closed adoption

2008-02-06T21:37:00.000-05:00

If a caseworker suggests that a child's adoption will be open, semi-open or closed, what does that mean? Most times, it will be required in an open or semi-open adoption that the child maintains contact with a specified member of the birthfamily. The guidelines for contact are varied and will be determined on a case by case basis (ex. sending letters/email or having face to face contact). If a 3rd party is required to monitor this approved birth family contact, it's called a semi-open adoption. Those who support openness in adoption believe that this continuity of relationships will minimize the child's losses. A closed adoption requires absolute confidentiality and most often the adoption records are sealed. Those who advocate for closed adoption state that not only are the on-going birth family relationships not in the child's best interests but access to the child's own adoption history should be limited or denied entirely.

Have you had an experience with an open, semi-open, or closed adoption?

To talk with an AdoptUsKids staff member, please call 1-888-200-4005.

contacting the child's caseworker

2008-01-30T20:39:00.000-05:00

AdoptUsKids encourages children's caseworkers to respond promptly to inquiries. Each state sets their own policy for the time and procedure for contacting families. Some workers manage their cases on a daily basis and are very prompt in responding to inquiries from prospective parents. Some caseworkers may only respond to families they feel are appropriate for a specific child because of the large number of inquiries that they receive. If you do not get a response to your inquiry it may be that the child has been placed and the worker has not updated the status. Most caseworkers prefer that you send your homestudy only if they request it. Some will not acknowledge the receipt of the homestudy unless, after reviewing your homestudy, you are actually being considered as a family for the child. If you do not hear from the caseworker in roughly a week after they would have received it, it is reasonable to contact them by phone or email.

What are some effective ways you have used to contact and stay in touch with a caseworker?

If you are having difficulty reaching a caseworker and would like assistance, please go to this Request to be Contacted Link and complete the form.

legislation that may impact your adoption

2008-01-30T20:26:00.001-05:00

A caseworker may decide that you are a match for a child based on these federal guidelines: ICWA, ASFA, or MEPA. Don't be intimidated - they are easier to understand than you think!

The Indian Child Welfare Act (ICWA) regulates the placement of Native American
children. In the recent past, most Native American children were being placed outside tribal communities, which reduced a child’s access to language and traditions important to their culture. Under ICWA, in any adoptive placement of an Indian child under State law, a preference shall be given to a placement with (1) a member of the child’s extended family; (2) other members of the Indian child’s tribe; or (3) other Indian families.

The Adoption and Safe Families Act (ASFA) supports permanency for children in foster care by
reducing timeframes for courts and child welfare agencies in working toward adoption. ASFA prohibits denial or delay of the adoptive placement of a child with the approved adoptive family based on the geographic location of the family. (This realtes to the ICPC that was discussed in a previous message!)

The Multiethnic Placement Act (MEPA) was enacted to eliminate
discriminatory practices that denied children permanency and discouraged applicants
from becoming foster and adoptive parents. The law focuses on these 3 points:
• An agency or individual cannot delay or deny a child’s placement for foster care or adoption
on the basis of race, color or national origin.
• An agency or individual cannot deny a person the opportunity to foster or adopt solely on
the basis of race, color or national origin.
• An agency must diligently recruit potential foster and adoptive parents that reflect the
diversity of children in care.

How have you been affected by these federal guidelines? How can you ensure that these policies are being followed correctly throughout your adoption process?

If you have a question about these policies, please go to this Request to be Contacted Link and complete the form. An RRT will contact you to answer your questions. Thank you!

family profile/homestudy process

2008-01-28T21:52:00.000-05:00

During the Homestudy/Family Profile, your agency worker meets with you in your home to talk about your personal history, family relationships, reasons for wanting to foster or adopt, and the supports you have available to you. They will determine whether your home is safe and has sufficient space for a foster or adopted child. The point of this step is to help you and the agency make the best possible decisions about whether placement of a child in your home will or will not work out and to determine the characteristics of the children whom you are most able to parent.

You are responsible to:
1. Get agreement among the members of their household to proceed with the process.
2. Cooperate with the homestudy and the home visits.
3. Ensure that all necessary information is supplied completely and accurately.

The Family Profile must be honest. Although you may be tempted to gloss over what might be considered “negative” about your family, this approach will help neither you nor the child you are hoping to adopt. Instead, caseworkers should address the problem area and -
with your family's input - include in the Family Profile how the your family has grown from these challenges. Your family should be told with whom the Family Profile will be shared and should receive a copy of the final Family Profile (without the letters of recommendation which must remain confidential). The Family Profile is about you and it contains both private information as well as your personal dreams. By reviewing your Profile, you can pinpoint any inaccuracies, which then can be corrected. After your family reviews the Family Profile, you should indicate agreement with the content by co-signing it along with the caseworker.

If you would like to be contacted by your state RRT, please go to this Request to be Contacted Link and complete the form. Thank you!

Adoptuskids' recruitment response teams

2008-01-25T10:41:00.001-05:00

AdoptUsKids’ network of Recruitment Response Teams (RRTs) works exclusively for families like yours. Each state, the District of Columbia and Puerto Rico has its own RRT staffed with experienced professionals in foster care and adoption. Sometimes they have even fostered or adopted themselves!

Your RRT will contact you within three days of your inquiry with AdoptUsKids to welcome you and provide you with helpful information and resources. If you have questions, be sure to ask. They will continue working with you as long as you need them in your foster care and/or adoption process. Your RRT is always available to:

• Give you a list of agencies in your area with information on attending the orientations as well as tips on how to pick which agency is best for you,
• Answer your questions and provide you with resources so you can increase your knowledge on your own,
• Provide you with encouragement and support,
• Link you to parent support groups where you will meet families like your own,
• Help you maneuver through any challenges that may pop up along the way,
• Be a resource and support for you in the child placement process – whether the child or children you are hoping to adopt are in your own state or out of state.

AdoptUsKids’ RRTs don’t provide foster and adoption services. They help you get the best services possible. They work for you, so contact them when ever you need assistance or support, or have good news you would like to share with someone who is really interested in your success.

You can talk directly with our AdoptUsKids staff by calling 1-888-200-4005 or you can register online at info@adoptuskids.org.

updating your information on AdoptUsKids.org

2008-01-25T09:39:00.000-05:00

If you are registered with AdoptUsKids online and need to update your information:

1. Log in to www.adoptuskids.org (your email address is your User ID and password)
2. Go to "Edit My Account Info"
3. Update your info as necessary

Let me know if you have questions!

matching families and children

2008-01-24T12:47:00.000-05:00

Caseworkers provide expertise and guidance to families and children throughout the search and matching process. Caseworkers have the very important task of determining what family is the best match for a child. Policies regarding the matching decision vary from one state to another and from one county to another. As a result, the timelines and processes that agencies use in the matching process may be quite different. As a result of the success in recruiting new families for waiting children, both through the national outreach of AdoptUsKids and state and local recruitment, caseworkers may receive several Family Profiles for a given child. The increase in the number of interested families is wonderful, but it puts additional pressures on children’s caseworker. Therefore you must be proactive yet patient in your contacts with the caseworker. Don't forget that although the caseworker's role is vital, families and children are decision-makers in the matching process too!