The Blog of Speaker and Author Jared Meyer

Grow Your Business by Simply Asking Questions

2009-10-01T10:02:00.000-07:00

There is a fantastic car wash business located about one half mile up the block from my condo in San Diego, Calif. You may find it surprising to learn, however, that it’s been two years since I last brought my car there. Yes, I’m one of those “temporary” customers: (1) I don’t use my car that often, (2) I enjoy “washing” it myself, and (3) keep it in my condo’s parking garage. However, my car still gets pretty dirty and could use some professional help.

While I may not be the ideal customer for a car wash business, I could become a better customer. Do you have any customers like me? I’m sure there are plenty of reasons why you don’t see much of us these days. However, there may be one reason unrelated to the economy as to why your customers may not visit your facility more frequently.

You see, my last experience at the local car wash up the street was very satisfying and it’s the only car wash that I would recommend to my neighbors. So aside from my preferences, why may it be another year or even two before I do business with them again?

I was probably their happiest, temporary customer that day back in 2007. When they were done working on my car, it looked phenomenal. Like it was brand new. I didn’t have to remain temporary, though. Since then, two years of potential revenue “down the drain” has occurred. Not because of anything that their staff did, but because of what their staff did not do during my last visit.

My visit was very pleasant. I looked around their shop while occasionally watching my car get cleaned. Those ten minutes would have been the perfect opportunity for the cashier or any available staff member to share a brief conversation with me. We could have discussed my preferences. We could have discussed their business. They could have told me about the importance and popularity of having one’s car washed there. They could have even asked me a few impactful questions that could have influenced my decision to return again at the very least each month. Instead, while I left very pleased, my interest in returning didn’t last longer than a few days.

Asking important questions will improve your business dramatically. Here are a few basic, but powerful questions for you to consider asking your customers no matter how often they do business with you. They are just a few questions that when asked by a friendly staff member can turn a temporary customer into a permanent one:

1. How often do you visit us? Why is that?
2. Can you guess the three most popular reasons our customers come back each week/month?
3. Do you know about our loyalty/discount program?

Imagine how often your customers will visit your business when they not only experience an extra level of customer service, but learn more about your operation and the reasons why you’re #1 in town.

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Jared Meyer is a marketing specialist, speaker and author who helps businesses gain exposure through quick, highly-efficient and highly-effective word-of-mouth marketing. Learn more about him at http://jaredmeyer.com

Why You Should Be Sorry for Saying You're Sorry

2009-09-13T07:23:00.000-07:00

It can be a powerful phrase: "I'm so sorry..." It can be a rather weak comment: "Sorry I'm late." No matter how it's used or when it's used, I've found that saying you're sorry is most often used as a social lubricant that both provides little authenticity and dilutes the power of making future heartfelt and sincere apologies.

Apology Abuse

The word "sorry" can have the power to make those who are making the apology feel bad even if the apology was completely unnecessary. Apologize to twenty people in one day about the most mundane things and I bet you'll feel pretty crappy by bed time. Saying you're sorry when you don't feel bad about something in the first place is bound to be like negative self-talk. Apologizing all the time will bring you down.

Here are a few overused, apologies that certainly had a purpose and were probably sincere, but were probably either unnecessary or superficial social niceties:

(1) "You've reached the voice mail of Jared Meyer at MakStar, I'm sorry I missed your call."
(2) "Sorry I'm late".
(3) "Sorry about that."
(4) "Oh, you wanted red peppers? Sorry."
(5) "I'm sorry, but... (I think you're wrong; you must have been mistaken; etc.)"

I could certainly spend a day apologizing (lightly, yet sincerely) to 100 people. What good would it do me? Well, I'd be considered by some as generally thoughtful and considerate. However, how many of those people would think that I was inconsiderate? While tainting my brand with apologies? Where there's smoke there's fire. Sometimes.

"Ever notice how Jared apologizes - even for the most insignificant things - so often? Boy, does he make a lot of mistakes and now that I think of it, he gives little thought to my needs."

Yes, this may be an extreme, but the theory is possible. Who do you know that uses apologies a bit too much and a bit too often?

This abuse of a special phrase that can have a deeply sincere, beautiful and impactful meaning is often diluted by being overused by too many for too many things too often.

Apology Neglect

So on one side, we've covered that apologies can be overused too much by too many. At the same time, on the other side, apologies are often underused and forgotten when they could have provided amazing connections, signs of being a fallible human being, significant relationship elixirs, conflict prevention, and the strengthening of relationships.

Saying "I'm sorry" is nice. Thank you for being considerate and having some manners. However, how sorry are you for being 15 minutes late and not calling the moment you knew you were going to be late? "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, okay!?" That just makes it worse. Not enough. Sorry.

I feel that a strong, true, and authentic apology will rarely be the often used phrase, "I'm sorry." A heartfelt apology would go something like this: "I really am sorry for [reason(s) for supporting remorse]." Now that means something to me.

Never Apologize When You Have to Prioritize

I've noticed that people sometimes don't focus on their own priorities and instead, feel guilty about not doing something with or for another. So what do they do? They give in and put their own priorities on hold. Rather than communicate their wants or needs, they may give in yet again, and hold off on what they need to do for themselves.

Tempting Examples:
1. "Would you help me paint the guest bedroom this weekend?"
2. "How about we take a ride up to LA? I've got a chair to deliver to a friend and would love your company."
3. "Can you stop by and show me how to use my new entertainment system?"

Helping out someone important to you is one thing. Until it becomes a common trend in a relationship, which is okay if that's what you enjoy. However. how many times have you said "Yes," to a request because you didn't want to reject someone's request, make them feel bad, or cause a rift in the relationship?

What if you were to have the courage to say, "No", would you apologize to soften the blow? Do you tell yourself, "Don't want to spend the little free time I have available today to help them, so I'll let them down nicely. Start with a "I'm sorry, but" and take it from there.

I feel that apologizing for something you haven't done (and especially won't do) doesn't soften the blow, but makes the rejection more painful for the recipient. Try this: don't start with a downer like, "I'm sorry." Say "I wish I could..." That's nice. Or ,"I would like to, but..." And finally, with dropping the bad vibes, provide a solution, too: "Sounds like fun. Why not just hire a college student using Craigslist to paint the room for you? You can call it an internship and they'll do it for free?"

I hope to apologize better in the future to maintain my position as a relatively consistent, considerate person. While it would be fun to see how I could impact the lives of people by apologizing to them at unnecessary and rather superficial moments, I will not give anyone the chance to misinterpret my intentions by being too considerate.

Don't agree with how I feel about this subject? Sorry about that, folks. Sorry.

Why To Keep Your Cell Phone Address Book Super Slim

2009-01-17T11:22:00.000-08:00

Moments ago, a friend of mine called me "weird" (a cognitive distortion known as "labeling") after she learned I didn't know that she was the one text-messaging me this morning.

For the record, out of the 18 contacts in my address book, four are family members (22%) and 12 are my closest friends or acquaintances I enjoy being connected to the most (78%) . Since I'm connected to nearly 2,000 people due to friendships, education, volunteering, or business, there are ten super smart reasons why I have under 20 contacts. Let's begin:

1. Functionality - I prefer to quickly locate the people with whom I speak the most.

2. Availability - Due to the nature of my work and lifestyle, I am most often unavailable for unscheduled phone calls.

3. Discipline - One of my personal preferences is to limit distractions.

4. Efficiency - E-mails are a better way to communicate for non-urgent priorities.

5. Interest - While it would be fun to be connected to plenty of people on my cell phone, I have enough fun being connected to people via e-mail and Facebook.

6. Effort - I am not interested in taking the time and making the effort to maintain an abundant address book.

7. Temptation - In my spare time, I do some personal coaching. While I'm an exceptional listener and enjoy helping people reach personal and business goals, I would be tempted to help even more people if I had 24/7 access to them in the palm of my hand.

8. Minutes - Up until May 2008, I had the 300 min./month Verizon calling plan. It's true, but I was actually only averaging 200 minutes a month. While I'm now on a 450 min./month plan (and actually hit 700 last month due to new coaching clients), having limitations helps me focus on my priorities.

9. Opportunity Costs - The more I speak on the phone today, the less I'll want to speak on the phone tomorrow. That's not good if tomorrow I'm committed to making specific phone calls. This one's for you, Ma!

10. My Profession - I am a professional speaker who is compensated to communicate to people on a one-on-one basis, in small groups, or before large audiences. Some days, I spend 8-12 hours speaking to people. For professional speakers, the last thing one wishes to do after a day or week of speaking is to speak on the phone. And for no fee, mind you.

So there you have it friends. Interested in having me speak? Please visit my web site to learn more about me.

10 Terrific Tips to Eliminating Risks in Your Kitchen

2009-01-15T13:07:00.001-08:00

I've hosted my home to a good deal of people and based on my experiences, here a few tips for those of you that would truly like to succeed in the kitchen and your life:

1. Eliminate any air from bags or packages with food to maintain freshness. Squeeze tight!

2. If you're fortunate to have two sponges at your kitchen sink, designate which one is exclusively for the kitchen counter tops and which is exclusively for washing dishes.

3. Only use the trash bin for dry trash. Use the sink for liquid waste.

4. You can save 87% more time and effort by quickly washing a dish by hand (versus rinsing it, putting it in the automatic dishwasher, preparing the dishwasher, waiting, and unloading the dishes.)

5. Expiration dates are often a brilliant marketing strategy to encourage increased spending for food products. Processed foods, especially, can last years well beyond their "best by" or "expiration date".

6. Back to the sponges again: once in awhile, put your sponges in the microwave for a minute to kill the bacteria. Give the sponges a good soak in water first to be more effective.

7. Speaking of the microwave, some research has shown that changing the molecular components of food prior to consumption can be dangerous. Use the stove or oven instead to reheat a dish and boil your tap water for tea.

8. Cleanliness is next to godliness my mother once said (each morning, day, and night). Keep in mind that your skin is your largest organ and what you put on it will be absorbed into your system. Select a safe hand soap or dish detergent.

9. Each time you prepare a meal or snack ask yourself, "Is this the best option for my health and well-being?"

10. Nearly 70% of the US population is overweight or obese and most have a sedentary lifestyle and eat animal products. Additionally, close to 50% of our population is on anti-depressants. Why do you think that is? What do they all have in common? Human consumption. Open your mind and see why plant-based diets lead to less occurrences of death and disease. Did you know that 50% of Americans will die from Heart Disease or Cancer? Lower your risks and start preventing disease in your own kitchen. FYI, arthritis, MS, and digestive disorders accounts for 75% of health-care costs. As they say, what (you eat that) doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger.

10 Questions I'd Rather Not Be Asked

2009-01-13T22:05:00.000-08:00

If you know me, you're probably aware that I rarely hate anything. Additionally, when it comes to finding the truth or determining needs or wants, you know that I love the power of asking questions. Except maybe ten questions that may traditionally cause one to feel upset. One being me. So, here they are in random order:

1. "Who do you think you are?"
2. "What, are you crazy?!"
3. "Don't you think that's a little weird?"
4. "Wanna grab a bite to eat?"
5. "Don't you think you should get a job?"
6. "What were you thinking?!"
7. "So, what do you do exactly?"
8. "Why don't you want to get married?"
9. "You can't eat that, right?"
10. "Are you my daddy?"

Top 10 Fears About Writing My Next Book on Fear

2009-01-10T21:10:00.000-08:00

1. I'm afraid I'll sell all my copies and won't even have a chance to read the book myself.

2. I'm scared that I'll be impacting so many readers' lives that I'll be in demand for speaking engagements and won't have any time to update my high school alumni network's web site.

3. I fear that the book will be so good that I'll never write another one because I won't be able to top perfection.

4. I'm afraid that American readers will be even more afraid in our "terrible economy" when they see that the title of my book is Fear and Doubt.

5. I'm scared that my friends will start reading books again because mine will be so enjoyable thereby cutting back the number of text messages and emails I receive on a daily basis.

6. I fear that Fear and Doubt, my eighth book, will be so good that it will be the first book of mine that my family actually reads.

7. I'm afraid that big-name publishers will come-ah-calling in such large numbers that I'll go over my minutes on my Verizon Wireless plan.

8. I'm scared that my web site will shut down due to the influx of web traffic.

9. I fear that I'll enjoy completing my next book so much that I'll realize that I prefer writing over professional speaking.

10. I'm afraid that the book-writing-process won't take two years, but two weeks, leaving more free time to update my high school alumni network's web site.

Are you a scaredy cat or top dog? Learn the truth about fear and doubt: fear and doubt

Is My Next Book's Subtitle a "Ridiculous Risk?"

2008-12-18T07:12:00.000-08:00

Beginning in 2009, I intend to start speaking to college audiences about fear and doubt. I am writing a book that takes a creative look at a misinterpreted roadblock. While the topic is serious (and timely), my approach will be fun. With a background in creativity and marketing, I've got some nice ethos - great credibility without a Psych degree. Besides, I've written seven decision-making books already, too.

But it's not that easy... Read on.

Originally, the title was: Fear and Doubt: How to Go from Scaredy Cat to Top Dog In 9 Lives or Less.

I loved it - it was making fun of other "30 days or less" self-help books, took a light look at a serious issue, and with 63% of Americans owning pets, how could I lose?

Now, I'm loving this idea more:

Fear and Doubt: Taking Ridiculous Risks Without Becoming Roadkill.

For those of you that may think "ridiculous risks" could be jumping out of a plane without a parachute or not flossing before bed, let's go deeper.

As you may know, the word "ridiculous" means

: arousing or deserving ridicule : absurd , preposterous

synonyms see laughable

My concept revolves around the fact that choices we make, which may have risks, are often blown out of proportion by other peoples' fears and not our own. It is their perception that may prevent us from taking action. Their fear may affect our fear. We prevent facing ridicule by often not taking action. Thus, risks become ridiculous - even when we know they are calculated and not death-defying.

Examples of ridiculous risks I've experience:

(1) Moving to CA without a job at age 24...
(2) With a finance degree, writing books for young readers...
(3) Living in San Diego without a "permanent J.O.B."...
(4) Subleasing a room in my apartment before becoming a homeowner...
(5) Building a career as a public speaker (anything but public speaking!)...

For years, my family was concerned about my choices as an independent, traveling, young professional. It didn't matter. My family often thought I should get a job. Very often. It got annoying. Their fears, not mine. I was taking ridiculous risks - they thought I was "out there" and not just out there on the West Coast. There were no risks. The true ridiculous risk would have been doing anything else unrelated to creativity, marketing, and relationships. And having a traditional 9-5 job. But I digress...

My point: sometimes the actual choices that we make aren't risky at all - the only big risk we face is being ridiculed by people we know - our peers, our family, our partners - and they are sometimes the reasons we choose to remain scaredy cats. Why do you think professional speakers are in high demand? That sweet fear of public speaking - what if they don't like me? What if.... etc.

In essence, no matter how risky, adventurous, or calculated, if someone else doesn't value, understand, or support your values and choices, they could easily be considered "ridiculous."

I'd like to change the minds of young adults. One mind at a time. So tell me your thoughts - I can take the ridicule - trust me. Will this subtitle work? And get me work? :)

Thank you.

Jared

PS: Visit www.jaredmeyer.com to see the proposed cover (click the image and find details on the book's promo-site under "The Book").

PSS: The book is not about courage, hope, or faith. It's about clear, creative thinking.

"My Battery is Going to Die!"

2008-11-19T18:34:00.000-08:00

You must have heard it a million times: "I've got to go... my battery is going to die." Whether you were speaking with your girlfriend in Los Angeles, your fiance in New York, your wife in Miami or all three lovely ladies at the same time on your cell phone, that familiar quote must ring a bell. Do you honestly think they were ever telling the truth? I for one have always been honest in stating the reality of my cell phone's condition, yet people sometimes think I'm talking about my fear of losing my phone's life.

Some people may believe that I'm obsessed with death and dying by bringing up the fact that my cell phone battery's days are numbered. Others may understand that when I say, "My battery is going to die," I mean that the power level in the current battery located in my cell phone is nearly empty and it would be a good time to end the conversation to prevent getting cut off mid sentence. I'm sure they all know it's the latter meaning.

Oh, but what if it were the perfect way to end a conversation without coming off as impersonal, curt, or inconsiderate? Personally, I feel the best way to end a conversation is to prevent having one in the first place, especially when we're talking about talking on a cell phone. What percentage of cell phone calls made during our most active hours are action-based? How many are talk-based? Let me explain:

Action-Based Phone Calls - briefly discussing logistics, strategies, or plans of action. Example: "I'm at the theatre and can get two tickets to Phantom tonight. Do you want to see it again for the seventh time?"

Talk-Based Phone Calls - briefly discussing whatever's on one's mind
Example: "What did you have for lunch today?"

Just consider the realities of using a cell phone. Beyond the potential convenience, realize the actual inconvenience. Have you ever experienced these symptoms?:

(1) Feeling compelled to check your cell phone each time it rings, chimes, or plays a seductive ringtone.
(2) Feeling obligated to answer every call including those without showing a legitimate telephone number in your "caller id".
(3) Feeling required to answer even if it's to say you're not available to speak.

Consider using the excuse "My battery is going to die" the next time your cell phone rings when you are compelled to answer that call. Only when you begin having the self-control to allow calls to go to voice mail or to leave your phone on in silent mode will you consider how much power you'll save by not immediately accepting an incoming call.

True autonomy and control will exist when you have the power to turn off the power, conserve your energy (and your cell phone's energy), and focus on the true urgent priorities in your day. Sometimes it's beneficial to be unavailable. Think about the common results of supply and demand and turn off your cell phone for a day or even a few hours.

During my senior year of high school, I had dated a young woman a couple of times and within a few weeks had lost interest in seeing her again. Upon attempting to reach me via telephone at home one night, my Dad (the sweetest guy I know), sensed her urgency in needing to speak to me. He quickly stated that someone must have either been dead or pregnant, so he asked, "Which is it?"

Good news: no one was dead or pregnant (or both). And would you believe that she never called me at my Dad's place again? If only cell phones today came with parental controls for adults.

Until that feature is offered, let's stick to e-mail, and I promise I won't get my Dad involved.

Why I Don't Want to Have Coffee (With You)

2008-11-18T18:55:00.000-08:00

Years ago, I bought stock in a company called Starbucks Coffee and walked away with $1000 in profit. It was around the same time I invested in a company called Krispy Kreme and lost about that much money, too. You may have heard of these companies; they're responsible for feeding millions of energy- and sugar-deprived Americans. It is with pleasure that I consider these corporations responsible for making our friends and neighbors the mentally-balanced and physically-fit champions that they are today.

And it's because of my unconventional perspective on American consumption and lifestyle-demolition that I won't be meeting a friend for a 32 oz. coffee or a dozen doughnuts anytime soon. The real reason, however, that I don't want to meet one-on-one with one of my classmates from middle school, high school, or college or any other long winding list of connections is due to quantitative overload.

Starbucks and Krispy Kreme have done good business at one point. I passed by a Starbucks today in the West Village of NYC and begin speaking to myself. "You don't go to Starbucks for coffee. You go to Starbucks to experience sharing a handmade custom-made beverage with complete strangers in a quant environment with modern-looking furniture. Starbucks offers a nice experience. Krispy Kreme offers a nice experience, too."

As a self-proclaimed experiential marketing specialist, I value top-notch experiences. That's why I won't be having coffee with you or anyone else. You want me to do what? Take time and make the effort to transport my body to a central, public location where consumption is king and I'm the jester? You want me to do what? Take time and make the effort to interact with you and share an intimate (although public) experience with you in a stimulating environment with revolving consumers?

There I go again. Blaming the experience we would share when the fact of the matter is very simple. In an ideal time and place, I would have the opportunity and resources to provide everyone I know and have some sort of connection with the chance to connect in person after months or years of mostly online communication. Unfortunately, I'm preoccupied in facing quantitative overload. And you know as well as I do that you're too busy, too.

It's not you, it's me. It's not that you're not important to me. You are - you always have been. Sure, we just met and I don't know your last name. Or sure, we've been connected for 10 or 20 years and I still haven't memorized your birthday. You mean the world to me. It's just that the other stuff in my life somehow seems more important.

Not to mention my consistent preference for independence, solitude, control, and silence after spending long periods of time speaking with people in person - while standing up!

I don't want to have coffee with you because I have filled my plate with responsibilities, projects, priorities, and obligations that are "conflicts of interest" when considering what we once shared. Your conflict may be high and my interest may be low, but you were a part of my life and still are and will always be apart of my life.

So, let's face it: since I'm totally booked, let's just stick to Facebook. And for the record, I don't even drink coffee. Some friend you are...

Ending an Abusive Relationship With E-mail

2008-11-16T15:21:00.000-08:00

In Timothy Ferriss' book, The 4-Hour Work Week, he suggested that a reader who is serious about saving time to try out a rare concept: checking e-mail twice a day. Ten in the morning and four in the afternoon worked for him at one point. This idea sounded great to me and I even tried it out twice on two separate occasions. While it worked out quite well those two days, I had always resorted back to the old strategy: checking my e-mail as many times as possible each day and responding to many of the e-mails I had received as often as well. Until recently.

I've recently been working on getting myself out of a bad relationship with my e-mail account. As e-mails come in these days, I greet them, welcome them to my Inbox, and read them, but don't immediately respond. I'm working on logging in less often and reading less e-mails, too. It's going to be a gradual process for me to change my behavior. Can you relate to any of these warning signs?

Warning Sign #1: Checking E-mail Too Many Times Each Day

Checking my e-mail a ridiculous number of times each day may have started in 2002. I never wanted to miss out on my next business opportunity, so I chose to login often. Looking back, I now realize that rather than waiting passively for my next opportunity (by proactively clicking "reload"), I could have invested more of my time creating my own next opportunity. Logging in often rarely led me to "lucking out" often.

Warning Sign #2: Opening and Reading Every E-mail

I've occasionally toyed with the idea of allowing an e-mail or two sit in my Inbox without opening it. Maybe for a moment, an hour, or a day. I have probably never done this, however, because each e-mail has been valued like a birthday card: "It doesn't matter what day it is, Mom. I want to open it now! Yay!"

Warning Sign #3: Immediately Responding to E-mails

It wasn't until I read Ferriss' book that I realized that I also had the tendency to respond to people's emails immediately and often. I'm talking about nearly every e-mail that I read from someone I knew and especially a new contact. No matter the time of day and no matter the topic, if I was at a computer, I chose to make myself available to respond. Business e-mail? "Yes, I'm still in work mode - it will only take a moment," I would tell myself. Personal e-mail? "I'm just taking a break - it will only take a moment."

Nonsense!

The moments added up and if I were to compile the amount of time I've spent logging in, checking, reading, and responding to e-mails, I could use that time to write my next three books. Do you know what happens when you respond to someone's e-mail? You usually get a response! And I bet you know what happens next. Chain reactions can get heavy, you know.

E-mails between friends sometimes lead to a snowball effect of notes shared between the two writers. Throw in the potential for comments that lack specifics and you've got more reasons to write back. Also, consider the e-mails one receives that offer new business opportunities but lack some important details. They may lead to requesting clarification via... e-mail! And let's not forget about the e-mails where she read one thing, you meant another, and it was only because what she wrote you thought meant something else.

How do we win here? Structure. Self-control. Discipline. Saying, "No!"

Who's hurting who the most? Is your e-mail account the bad guy here or is it you? Either way, if you can relate to this unhealthy relationship, only you have the power to get out of it. Your e-mail account is unable and unwilling to mend the relationship.

I met Timothy Ferriss briefly in August at the National Speakers Association national convention in NYC. He had just given a presentation on marketing and social networking and was in an elevator. It stopped on the floor I was on and the door opened. The elevator was packed and he was facing in with his arms spread out. I asked, "Is that Timothy Ferriss?" It was. I told him I enjoyed his presentation, introduced myself, shook his hand, and told him I'd send him an e-mail. I also noted that I understood that it may be weeks before he would respond.

Would you believe that I never actually wrote him that e-mail I said I would write? It turns out that his advice in cutting back on e-mail can eventually work. Try it out for yourself and be sure to let me know how it goes. Right now! But write later.

Volunteer Work Will Set You Free

2008-11-15T14:12:00.000-08:00

Bird-watching was the only nontraditional hobby I had in high school. Don't laugh. Reading self-help books replaced that hobby during my senior year. Be nice. While I may have only read two self-help books at that time, they were both by Dale Carnegie. Carnegie mentioned in his book, How to Stop Worrying and Start Living, that a great way to overcome psychological suffering caused by depression is to volunteer.

This tip worked for me personally as a high school senior in 1996 when I created a bad scenario inside my head due to what I call, "negative creativity." I foolishly chose the wrong path which led me to thinking the wrong way. I ultimately chose to feel awful about the unknown outcome of what I thought was a bad choice, and coped with my stressor by painting a small bedroom in my Mom's house.

While it wasn't even volunteer work because it was (1) part of my job as a good son and (2) a specific request made by my Mom, the productivity and creativity that I experienced helped me change what was going on inside my head. I suppose there wasn't much creativity, though, given that I used just one color of paint. Throughout this project, I forgot my previous preoccupation with unreasonable fear and doubt.

There are so many ways in which a person may volunteer these days. Leadership works for me. Since 2005, I've been volunteering as president of the University of Maryland Alumni Club of San Diego. Earlier this year, I began volunteering as the founding president of my high school's unofficial alumni association. While I've experienced pride and joy connecting fellow alumni across the county and country, respectively, my efforts have not been self-serving (even though it often feels that way).

Me volunteer? A self-employed, sole proprietor, whose own web site domain name is jaredmeyer.com has the ability to think beyond his own well-being, own career, and own personal agenda? Sure thing.

Consider volunteerism a hobby. Like birdwatching, but with less redundancy, more satisfaction, and less people laughing at you. Anyone who laughs at you for having a nontraditional hobby clearly hasn't read Carnegie's How to Win Friends and Influence People. And for those of you who are just a tad curious about the lad who bird watched as a teenager, let's just say he always got the chicks.

Curb Your Dog's Enthusiasm

2008-11-14T14:48:00.000-08:00

I've had the pleasure of living in NYC here and there over the past few months and I've got to say that it's been a real treat. While there are so many wonderful things I can comment upon like the noise from automobiles, the smell from plenty of smokers, and general overcrowding, I thought I'd take a moment and focus on what I now call, "Animal (Self) Control."

I'm sure it's not the pet owners or their professional dog walkers that are purposely walking their dogs in the middle of the sidewalk while blocking oncoming traffic and allowing biological deposits to appear across the city. I'm sure that it is the dogs who are really to blame. I have found that the dogs in NYC are so enthusiastic about walking around such a stimulating city that they often disregard the fact that sidewalks are meant solely for walking. Ever wonder why dogs are so excited to get the hell out of their homes? Read on.

"New York City! Center of the Universe! The City That Never Sleeps!," these dogs must be thinking as they go about their business as if the sidewalk were one, long desk. While the gutter is an undogly place to be productive, from a humanitarian perspective, what reasonably-minded human would allow their pets to "pound the pavement" anywhere on the pavement?

Hundreds of thousands of people walk on the sidewalks each day in NYC. Hundreds of thousands of New Yorkers walk inside their homes each night. And hundreds of thousands walk in and around their living quarters at any and every moment. That being said, why would any dog walker be comfortable allowing a dog to enthusiastically "go" on the pavement?

Sure, there's no specific law about walking dogs on a specific side of the sidewalk. There's a law about picking up after your dog. Thank goodness. New idea: how about a law of dog walking only being legal on the pavement closest to the curb? "Curb Your Dog" is a law that states one should be responsible for and pick up after their dog. Is that enough? Nope. There is no law here that states that the said dogs in question are required to be walked curbside.

Imagine if it were a law to only walk a dog curbside. Would anyone be found violating the law by a police officer? Would they try to fight the ticket? "Your honor, I was leading my dog to the curb, but due to biology and my pet's lack of self-control, we didn't make it there in time. You know how exciting it is to live in NYC. My dog is quite enthusiastic and hard to curb." It's a reasonable excuse, especially when your record is clean and any knowledge of previous violations has been wiped away.

So, where do we go from here? Let's start a movement where all pet owners and dog walkers take responsibility to keep the sidewalks clear. Do you know why the dogs are so enthusiastic to go outside in NYC? It may be because the floors inside their homes are dirtier than the sidewalks. Where's Larry David when you need him? (Cue the music.)

--

Need a professional dog walker in NYC? "While the economy has been falling, business has actually been picking up," says Mia MacFarlane, owner of Canine Concierge.

Why I Don't Want Kids

2008-11-13T16:06:00.000-08:00

Having had an online dating profile for 10 years, my stated preference in having children has been anywhere between "Do not want children" to "Someday."

No matter what I feel at this moment about having and raising children, anything is possible in the future. I may want kids in the year 2018.

Nevertheless, as I look back at over 30 years of being a human being, I continue to state to those closest to me and the media that I currently do not want to have children.

The media have made a big deal about this by including my story in multiple publications like People and Time magazine. Check it out for yourself. Big story. Everywhere. Even in The Economist, writers have found my story compelling.

My story is very simple. Call it a "condition" if you prefer.

In general, I have learned that being the best parent possible requires a significant amount of consistent time, interest, resources, effort, and dedication. See the acronym? It spells T.I.R.E.D. That's a red flag for someone like me.

Who am I?

I am a talented, young, pre-occupied, independent, self-focused, traveler. I've been a T.Y.P.I.S.T. since graduating college. No matter what I've been or done and no matter what I've experienced, I have never wanted to have nor raise children. It's that simple. It's that rare. It is what it is.

Basic biology states that humans are to have children as what's the point to be human if you're not procreating?

Don't get me wrong, I'm pro-creating. In fact, I'm very pro-creating and perhaps that's the challenge. I have been so preoccupied with creativity - music, art, writing, and self-expression since college that I haven't made the time to consider a life dedicated to children.

I've been focused on building a career as a professional speaker, building wealth, and improving my health. I don't have the time nor the inclination to consider having children. It's not that I don't value the idea of family - I do. Thanks to my parents' divorce, my family is a little bigger and I have an extra parent. It's just that I would rather commit myself to 100 things before I commit to a child.

Am I a bad person? Not at all. I've been very responsible in preventing having children. I would rather do an exceptional job at not being a father than do a poor job at being a parent.

Look kids, it just comes down to one thing: I am not - nor have I ever been - interested in having children because I have been interested in so many other things that I never took the opportunity to consider the wonderful aspects of fatherhood.

So, stop being a baby, and consider being more open-minded to those that don't desire the same biological things as you. When it comes to biology, not everyone prefers a healthy-lifestyle, daily physical activity, or being a vegetarian. And not everyone prefers the same psychological things like being self-employed, traveling the country, and focusing on their music, art, literature, and public speaking.

Who wants to hear a bedtime story?!

Let me write it first. My "baby" is due New Years Eve and I hope she's a healthy 150 pages, easy to read, and super fun. Just like her father.

My Addiction to Frequent Flyer Miles and More

2008-11-12T14:14:00.000-08:00

I swear, your honor, it's not an addiction - it's just a powerful affinity that I have towards the airlines, hotels, and restaurants that offer me sweet incentives to remain their #1 loyal fan.

In fact, sometimes I'm able to double, triple, or quadruple-dip not just because they allow such an option (like Hilton Honors program where you get double points or additional frequent flyer miles with each stay), but because I work the system like I have nothing better to do with my time.

Here's one basic example of how I've been able to build value while experiencing great flights, hotel stays, and meals:

Make a dinner reservation using OpenTable.com and ideally when you can get those special 1,000 point reservations (vs. the usual and petty 100 points).
Dine at a restaurant with a frequent diners program - like Lawrys or Chart House.
Dine at a time or on a day where you get double points from said restaurant. Before 6pm at Lawrys or on Mondays at Peohe's in San Diego, Calif., for example.
Use a credit card where you get double points at restaurants (JetBlue American Express credit card)
Get reimbursed for the meal by your client, employer, partner, or family member.

As you leave the restaurant, grab the bowl of candy on the counter, post them on Craigslist, and you'll gain an additional amount of value.

Need more value? Approach the person handling the service where they park your car for you. I'm drawing a blank on the name of the service because I'm only thinking of my points that I have with seven hotels and eight airlines. Feign like you lost your ticket. Mention "Vehicle 12" and he'll grab the keys and get your new car. It's practically free, but out of good faith and being a fair and decent human being, tip the guy $5.00.

I'm sure you know what to do with the vehicle after you take it home.

eBay, kids, eBay.

Gonna Party Like It's 1929

2008-10-10T14:54:00.000-07:00

Long ago, in October of 1929, something pretty significant happened in America. The great stock market crash that occurred on Oct. 29th that year was followed by a huge depression and other bad stuff. History used to be my favorite subject until "creative writing" became my favorite class. "Bad stuff" is a historically creative comment that our nation's best writers have shared with their readers. Trust me on this one.

Things sure were different back then: cell phones and the Internet were fantasies and the TV we know of today wasn't invented until just about one year prior to the crash. "Pounding the pavement" and "banging the phones" led most people towards finding work, earning income, and building relationships. Now, all we have to do is send a bulk e-mail to our 1,352 friends online and we'll end up with at least four job offers, but what if aspects of then began now?

What if our country was facing similar economic crises that were as bad as back in 1929? The way things are looking, we may be preparing for some bigger challenges beyond inflation, foreclosures, failing banks, and a falling stock market. Boy have things changed:

Urgent Priorities at That Time:
(1) Food
(2) Shelter
(3) Clothing

My Urgent Priorities at This Time:
(1) Food, Shelter, and Clothing
(2) Cell Phone and Internet
(3) Gym and Music
(4) Travel and Entertainment

Like back then, substances like alcohol, nicotine, and caffeine won't be a priority because those are surely just for social purposes and surely, who feels like celebrating now? However, as New Years Eve approaches, Americans will still celebrate beyond the general good times experienced on Halloween and Thanksgiving (and those other Winter holidays).

Without those three party enhancements (the sauce, sticks, or kicks), Americans should still be able to enjoy spending time together in person. During the 1920s and early 1930s, Americans were still able to have a good time without booze and I'm sure they can have an even better time now without all of the three pricey, "evil doers."

Beyond the celebrations, life in the US will be like ole' times again. We'll try to simplify and prioritize. Maybe instead of spending zero hours watching TV or Internet each day like they did back then, we'll cut back by one or two hours a day. Perhaps we'll pull out Checkers or Candyland and spend some quality time with our loved ones. Imagine all the books we could read! Imagine all the books I could write!

I'm going to go start planning for my book launch party. Imagine the 1000s of people that will want to come together and celebrate my next book, The Truth About Fear and Doubt. Just when you thought it was safe to go out and celebrate on Halloween, an even scarier event is approaching. Considering joining me at a party celebrating a scary subject like fear where the only stimulants found will be within a 150 pg. book. Writing 150 pages in America? Now that's something pretty significant, too.

Rejected from The University of Vulnerability

2008-10-05T18:40:00.000-07:00

I'll be the first to firmly admit that I was never rejected by the admissions department at The University of Vulnerability. I was never admitted either, though, because I was afraid that I may be rejected. I prevented the potential mental pain (shame, sadness, or embarrassment) by not applying at all.

According to Merriam-Webster's online dictionary, here are the first two definitions of the word "vulnerability":

1 : capable of being physically or emotionally wounded
2 : open to attack or damage : assailable <vulnerable to criticism>

I would never want to be capable of being hurt or open to the opportunity of facing a loss. I would never want to be vulnerable - unless I was capable of calculating risks and open to the opportunity of facing great rewards.

I believe there's a theory, thought, quote, or myth - something - about "risk versus reward." The greater the risk, the greater the reward. It's apparent in gambling or investing in stocks, but does it apply to experiences in day-to-day life?

Is there any difference in the related risks and rewards of applying to one school versus another? Asking one person out for a date versus another? Committing to one career over another?

Perhaps the higher the quality, the more likely one may choose to feel bad about possibly being rejected. Perhaps in our daily lives, rejection is all the same until we face extremes.

Example: I meet a woman I like a lot (like, "I would have this person's children and spend the rest of my life with them,"), share a conversation, ask her out, and she rejects me. I could immediately feel bad and start to question the multiple reasons she said, "No." Or I could appreciate my willingness to risk loss (losing something I never truly had, though) and realize that there was a good chance her choice had very little or even nothing to do with me.

No matter the reason, I would have been educated enough to be open to the opportunity. The more open we are to opportunities, the more opportunities we are open to finding. Cyclical Pattern #1.

It sounds nice, but for someone who prefers to think good thoughts (and therefore feel good based on those thoughts), going the easy route has been a preference of mine as well.

No one wants to feel inadequate. Good news: there's a way to prevent feeling dumb or weak after choosing to be vulnerable to rejection and loss: understanding and accepting reasons for your potential "failure" that don't even relate to you. And being open to learning about ways to improve your position, offerings, or competitive advantage.

I'm apart of "Generation Me" and often get what I want. Personally, however, this mentality places limitations on what I want because to play it safe, I normally don't want very much. Cyclical Pattern #2.

If I reprogram myself just a little bit and realize that I can have whatever I want within reason while being reasonable (and sure, vulnerable), I may be more likely to attempt to get it. Get it? I did. Eventually...

Clear and Pleasant Danger

2008-10-05T08:36:00.000-07:00

Just when you thought it was safe, they tend to stick around like they're your family. You can move out or move across the country, but they may always be there unless you change your mind and ask them to leave. In preparation of my next book on fear and doubt, I realized that both can sometimes be like overprotective parents.

Fear and doubt may have been the #1 reason I didn't become a keynote speaker immediately after college graduation. Fear and doubt's response: "As long as you're under our roof, you will do what we say." The roof being the top of my head in that case, for fear and doubt are like an extra set of parents that reside deep inside of it.

Fear and doubt may have been the #1 reason I rarely approached a young woman to start a conversation with the intention of dating her. Fear and doubt's response: "We were only trying to protect you, honey."

If someone were to ask me right now: "Jared, if you could do it over, would you have focused completely on building a career as a keynote speaker?", I wouldn't necessarily say, "Yes." In general, I'm not one to regret things. Additionally, the past eight years have allowed me to speak on behalf of over 100 companies. I was okay being fed scripts no matter how small they were. I made the material my own. And rather than look back and regret my choices, I'd prefer to say I am grateful for the past and now prepared to provide my own topics and content.

I now acknowledge that even if I had started giving presentations based on my shtick more often after graduation, I would have probably faced fear and doubt in other areas of my work.

Until I truly understand the intricacies of fear and doubt, there may always be something to fear. Maybe I didn't do then what I would have now liked to have done due to simply not being ready. I wasn't ready to face hard work. I wasn't ready to face potential rejection. And certainly, I wasn't ready to face my fears.

Whatever it was that held me back, it allowed me to have a relatively carefree, easy, and enjoyable quality of life. The dangers of not getting booked, making a positive impression on audiences, nor earning income from speaking were hidden by years of working as a public speaker and marketing specialist. Gigs that allowed me to feel like I was on vacation.

"Maybe you should get a real job," my fear and doubt would ask me. No, wait, that really was my Mom who was the only one who said that. And besides, the only real job that I knew that was right for me at the time (and now) is that of a professional speaker. There is no other rational, realistic, reasonable, or practical choice. That is, of course, other than stalling.

The clear and pleasant danger of having fear and doubt on and off during the past eight years was that I chose "Plan B" - to do what was easy and not what was right. I did what was practical short-term and not what was best. Life was pleasant thanks to the dangers I knew were possible.

"What if they don't like me? What if they don't take me seriously? How will I remain competitive?" We do what we want to do and clearly keynote speaking was not what I wanted to do at the time.

As I write this entry from a hotel room at Disney World in Orlando, Fl, I can't help but realize that the similar imagination that brings cartoons to life can often motivate us to create characters in our heads. Which will you chose today, Jared? Is your character a hero or a villain?

Whomever it is, I don't intend to see them at our Thanksgiving Dinner. Fear and doubt, like the overprotective parents in our heads, won't be welcome to join us. Besides, they'd probably only complain about the uncomfortable topic of this book, its latest cover, and the fact that it's taking me "forever" to write it.

When you feel there's no one-way out, remember, there's always a one-way ticket available, and I know that fear and doubt love to fly. Good news, the delay is over, and their flight is now boarding.

When a Facebook Friend Deletes You

2008-09-24T09:22:00.000-07:00

I didn't see it coming and I especially never imagined that it would happen to me. "Those things only happen to bad people," I always thought.

My objective over the past six months has been to gradually build upon my online social network. This has been done by including anyone with whom I've met along the last 30 years. This also includes anyone with whom I share an affinity such as my Alma maters (high school or university). It also goes beyond those who I know. Anyone who knows anyone I know has been welcome to connect.

Life is good when you have nearly 400 friends on Facebook. At least ten will remember your birthday. At least five will buy your book. At least two will comment on a photo. At least one will be motivated to look.

One of the best things about online communication is that you can avoid the fear of rejection by not responding to one's message or requests. It's nothing personal. It's completely personal.

I have lost someone who was once close to me on Facebook. This is my story.

A few weeks ago, I was distracted and not prioritizing and somehow noticed that a friend of mine was no longer a friend of mine - on Facebook. She still had an account. This was confirmed by seeing that we both still shared a friend in common.

But we were no longer connected.

Sure, I hadn't seen her in over four years, hadn't spoken on the phone since then, and shared a few minor emails, but come on. That's what Facebook is for: allowing some people to remain connected while not barely connecting at all.

And now that we're not even connected on Facebook. The feeling of loss enters from stage right. Are we truly no longer friends? Did I do something to offend her (again)? Hah.

Maybe it was a techinical error. Maybe she removed her account and started from scratch. Maybe it was because I mentioned the possibility of seeing each other earlier this year while I was in NYC and never followed up. Maybe it was because we had dated briefly in the past and she has a new boyfriend and couldn't bare to see my daunting away messages.

Messsages like, "I'm writing my next book." Or, "I am a professional speaker." Things that would make any new boyfriend jealous when learning about the other men.

I've spent four and half hours trying to determine why she would have removed me from her Facebook account. Make it eight hours. Ten hours, yeah, that sounds good - ten. Ten hours of creative thinking and plenty of "tears and heartache." Buckets, I tell ya', buckets.

Instead of that "awful suffering," I could have written her a quick e-mail asking what happened between us, but to be honest, during those ten hours of "woe," I actually connected with another 1,342 people, and totally forgot about her, the despair, and the fear of never seeing her Facebook profile again.

When one door closes, another 1,342 open. That's another three friends that may buy my next book. Another two friends that will have a friend whom wants to connect. And at least one extra friend who will criticize me for trying to be funny in this blog.

Facebook: that's what virtual friends are for.

Four (4) Commercials Featuring Jared Meyer as the Newber Silhoutte

2008-09-10T20:21:00.000-07:00

I am the "Newber Silhouette." Enjoy these four commercials that were made public today. Sorry kids, this professional speaker was silent for the role. On the bright side, it'll make my future appearances at kid's parties easy - no talking. Kidding. Click here to see a production photo and then click back to watch the videos!

Business Card (Commercial 1 of 4)

Newber - Do Not Disturb (Commercial 2 of 4)

Newber Intro (Commercial 3 of 4)

Newber - Contact Finder (Commercial 4 of 4)

Startling Statistics About American Psychology

2008-09-06T17:38:00.000-07:00

"What are you, crazy?" It's a common question that people either say in jest or say upon reacting to a stressor in their life, but as data becomes more well-known, asking such as question may be found to be considered offensive to some people. 25% of people, in fact.

According to the National Institute of Mental Health, one out of four Americans suffers from a mental illness. While the spectrum is broad and there's an emphasis on mood disorders and depression, their statistics can shed some much-needed light as to why some people appear to be more difficult than others.

Twenty-five percent. I've been using this statistic in conversations over the past few years mostly on a one-on-one basis with people. There hasn't been an opportunity to use it in any presentation. It's still an important fact to me and can explain some unexplained behavior I've witnessed or heard about in the past.

Off the top of your head, besides one of your family members, who would you label as "crazy?" If you thought that many homeless people must be crazy (the ones who are most often found talking or even arguing with themselves), you'd actually be mistaken. According to the Arizona University of Education's web site, just 20-25% of homeless people (nearly the same percentage as the sample of the general public) suffer from serious mental illness in America.

After 30 years of experience as a human being, combined with a plethora of conversations and evaluations in addition to the research I've done and the classes I've taken, I feel I'm a good judge of character. With no psychological credentials beyond coursework, some have suggested that I use the term "intuition" when it comes to my understanding of the human condition. Whatever it may be, I hope to provide assistance to people that are resistant to understanding, accepting, and forgiving people for behaving in ways that one could label as "crazy."

Whether or not one isn't well today, the next day, or everyday, considering the facts of American life may help us deal with what we assume are difficult people. Don't always jump to conclusions; don't always make assumptions; and don't always think that people are trying to be difficult. Many people don't know they aren't well until patterns develop and they are confronted about their behavior. This is often the perfect time for interventions to take place by loved ones.

I should have studied psychology.

Being Efficient Works Even With Your Loved Ones

2008-09-01T01:56:00.000-07:00

Is it me or have you ever noticed resistance when you attempt to be as efficient as possible while on the telephone with someone you care about personally?

"Hi, this is Jared," I often say to my Mother upon connecting with her during our weekly phone call. I want to immediately clarify that it's me calling and jump to my second objective: determining whether or not it's a good time to talk.

"Is this is a good time to talk?," I may say. Sometimes it is, sometimes it isn't.

"Where are you?" She usually asks first upon realizing we are confirmed and prepared to catch up.

"San Diego," I sometimes say.

We catch up on her week or weekend and how she's been doing and then lead into the professional and financial aspects of my life. Next up, we chat about family members. Before ending the call, we say our goodbyes that are always topped with an "I love you," something, mind you, that I started doing with her last year - thanks to my step-father, Michael's, leadership.

I suppose I could initially say, "Hi Mom," and she would know it was me calling. How many people call her Mom? And of those three kiddies, how many sound like me?

So, what's my motivation?

Something magical happens when I'm on the phone - I am Mr. Business. No matter the person with whom I'm speaking, I transform from a laid back chap to "Professional Speaker."

Do I like having control? Absolutely. Maybe I'm conditioned by all those years of sales calls I've made (for the record: zero sales calls have been made). It's just my preference. It's what I like. It's what I, dare to say, love.

At the very least, let the record show that I no longer call my father by his first name. My sister is happy about that. I should probably call her.

Good Bye Theory, Hello Action

2008-08-30T21:09:00.000-07:00

I finally started reading Bob Prosen's book, "Kiss Theory Good Bye," today. He begins his 200+ page book by stating that theory is important while action and results are more important. Focusing on theory sure can be comfortable. I've had the theory of developing my career as a professional speaker based on what I've learned works. Great data. Makes perfect sense.

At the same time, just as I begin activating my new division of MakStar Marketing, Superman Design, I have started thinking about the importance of having goals, a plan, and planning.

When it comes to money, I don't think I've ever had specific financial goals. I've just ridden the wave over the years while maintaining a positive attitude that money would come easily and frequently, or at least eventually.

I know the right way to get what I want. I have always known. The information seems right and the process makes sense. Sometimes, I don't act and strive for actual results. Most of the time I wait for opportunities to arise. There has never been an urgency to succeed.

Turning 30 in June was nice. It wasn't a big deal like it was for a month after turning 25. Boy, were those four weeks tough. As a 30-year-old, I feel I'm at peace compared to the hustle of my 20s. I've felt as if I've never been more focused. I call that theory. It's all in my head.

Now it's time to take the theory - what I've learned, worked, and waited for - and proactively give it life by taking action, having specific and timely goals, and getting the results I've been fantasizing about for a few moments each year. It's time to finally blow out the candles and eat the cake. Let's dig in.

Visit Las Vegas and You May Change Your Career Focus

2008-08-29T19:24:00.000-07:00

I recently attended the Magic fashion tradeshow in Las Vegas, NV, and was hit with a rather prominent - and life-changing - realization.

For many years, my objective was to speak to corporations and associations given the potential impact of influencing large quantities of people while receiving a positive return on investment.

While in Las Vegas this past week, upon sharing my current book idea with a few new team members, I realized I have been blind for two years.

It's been two years since I've spoken to young audiences as a professional speaker. Upon finishing up my work with Monster.com during the summer of 2006, I had decided that I was no longer interested in speaking to that demographic. I felt that the experience was invaluable, the impact positive, and portfolio-building... nearly perfect.

The future, I believed, would be filled with opportunities to speak to corporate audiences and associations - sharing my messages, stories, and expertise. That was the plan.

While moving forward and building upon my career, I now find myself gearing up again to speak on behalf of OPEN from American Express four times over three days at a tradeshow in Baltimore, MD next month. While hosting another 12 business clinics, I will enjoy speaking to business owners and the like. Yes, I will like that.

What I would like more, it turns out - given my experience in Vegas, is that of all the people out there, I would most be interested, most be comfortable, most be passionate about speaking to college audiences.

Duh. My first book was a college guidebook to the University of Maryland. I've been president of the UM Alumni Club of San Diego for over three years. I'm the founding president of my high school alumni association. My #2 priority is education. The seven books I've written and the 13 I've revised are for young adults. I've spoken at UMaryland and Univ. of California several times.

This is a no-brainer. Talk about "fighting biology" - I've been secretly fighting with myself for two years. Secretly meaning I didn't know it until recently. And fighting meaning holding myself back from really doing what I would love doing.

For many years, I've battled with determining what my one topic would be as a professional speaker. I never gave thought to my target demographic, since I felt my messages, experience, and delivery would be universal.

I don't get excited about much and I'm happy to announce that I'm very excited about starting a new speaking business plan. I am currently a professional speaker who speaks to college audiences about developing creativity, marketing, and building relationships. Let's go back to school, kids.

The U.S v. Bad Creativity

2008-08-22T18:47:00.000-07:00

Your honor, I bring before you and those of the court, the case of the U.S. v. "Bad Creativity." For every moment that is spent being creative with fear in mind, I ask the jury to consider the first and most impressive piece of evidence.

For every, "What if," spoken or thought by Americans, at times of fear and doubt, they have taken the proactive part of being creative for all the wrong reasons. With the freedom to be creative in the first place, these self-destructive choices have led our citizens to experience "bad creativity" instead of "good creativity."

Conflict and chaos can happen. Why had these victims not previously thought, "Well, there is a chance that...," and followed up with, "And I understand the potential reality and risks, and would still like to take the risk and attempt reaching the outcome."?

When facing a challenge - something that can lead to a negative response in our minds - we are often creative. Whether or not we know it, we are often creating. Here's an example:

You've got a new job opportunity! - "Good Creativity" would prompt a person to say out loud or to themselves, "I would like to apply for this job. Should I ultimately receive an offer, I intend to learn a lot, gain experience and income, build relationships, and connect with my next opportunity. The potential is unlimited." "Bad Creativity" could alternatively prompt a person to say or state, "What if I apply and don't get an interview? What if I get the interview, but don't get the job?" What if I get the job and don't like it?" What if I get the job, like it, but get fired for non-compliance or because of downsizing?" With all of that "creativity in mind," I'm surprised more Americans aren't using their "Good Creativity" by painting, writing, performing, and designing. Perhaps they're too consumed with "Bad Creativity."

Kids, most of what happens in our lives prompts us to respond with creativity - whether you like it or not and whether you know it or not. Until now. That is, of course, we attempt to fight biology and prevent our imagination from taking wing.

Therefore, I'd like to bring a lawsuit against "Bad Creativity" on behalf of the United States. "Bad Creativity" is responsible for making Americans feel poorly and for motivating them to either take foolish action or not act at all. The sole "principal in the first" is one of humanity's most wanted, "Ignorance." What say you?

Change and Conflict Make My Day

2008-08-21T18:44:00.000-07:00

I was the guy in the office who welcomed change or conflict. Someone let go? Perfect. A crew of 40 advertising sales execs booted out on a Friday morning? Sure thing. And what about when I was the target of significant change or a crappy conflict? Not a problem.

That is, unless, I was really enjoying my life before the change or conflict. However, sometimes, my connection to that which I desired at the time may have simply been superficial. This would be the perfect opportunity to provide an example, but I'll keep you compelled by moving on to my next thought.

I'm not fearless. I've got a few things that I've yet to evaluate and "get over" like heights, snakes, and bugs. However, compared to most people (complete assumption with little merit), I feel I suffer from a lack of general, common, or popular fears. That's right boys and girls, this cat loves change and understands conflict, so what's there to fear? Everything that's on my little list or those things of which I have feared in the past all came about because of being ignorant.

So, if you consider these four points, you may begin to understand that I'm headed for the "top dog" door:

1) Beyond the career objective of being a professional speaker, I have had no other significant goals in life aside from optimal health. Therefore, no goals, no fears of not reaching them.
2) I am a product of change - and soldier of change - given that 1/2 of my childhood was spent living in two homes every-other-week. Back and forth. Back and forth. Great divorce, great training.
3) I feel conflict leads to opportunity and the potential for excitement and freshness. Bring it on an we'll face off.
4) I have the strong feeling that most fear doesn't have to be overcome by courage, faith, or hope, but by knowledge, education, training, and understanding.

I am so close to writing this book. Let me just finish reading the third one on fear. I promise to finish before Sunday. Boo.