sarah d ramblings

Farewell 2009 - it's been fun :)

2009-12-21T23:27:00.002Z

Today the staff at CJC celebrated Christmas in style with a lovely meal. As is tradition (I found out today) we answered 2 questions around the table.

1 - What has been the highlight of the last year for you?

2 - What do you hope for next year?

The highlight I chose came within the first few weeks of 2009 - moving to Croydon. It really has been the most amazing journey for me. Settling in to a new location, new church and new group of friends has had a few challenges (mostly small and insignificant) and a whole heap of blessings.

I'm so thankful to God for all He's done this year. My relationship with Him is totally different to this time last year, I am free from a whole heap of stuff that was holding me back and I know His Grace and goodness towards me on a much deeper level.

There have been many other highlights to 2009, fantastic time spent with friends, weddings, holidays, mission trips, treasure hunts, salvations, camps with thousands of young people, new music listened to, healings, new songs learnt, lives transformed, exciting opportunities, new friends made, gigs attended, coffees enjoyed, the list goes on and on and on....

Above all I look back on 2009 and thank God for all He has done in my life. I thank Him for the amazing revelation He's given me about Himself, I thank Him for the most awesome Church family and for the security He's given me in Him. All I can say is bring on 2010!

Christmas Gift from Worship Central!

2009-12-17T15:35:00.004Z

I love worship music - when new worship music is released from my favourite artists I get a little bit excited! Listening to a brand new worship album thrills my heart and brings me closer to Jesus.

What's better than new worship music? FREE new worship music!

Worship Central have put together this little 6 track acoustic worship album which can be downloaded for free here.

The album features Tim Hughes and Ben Cantelon - you really can't go wrong :)

Download it now and let it feed your soul - you really would be stupid not too ;)

From the mouths of infants.....

2009-12-06T14:43:00.003Z

I was looking after a little 4 year old girl today at church as her mum was playing the piano in the worship band and her dad was anchoring the meeting - she helped me do some welcoming by handing out the notice sheets and then she sat with me during the worship before she went off to her group. She is the most articulate 4 year old I've ever met.

At one point during the worship she span round in circles for pretty much the whole song - it was a brilliant sight, she just loved the fun of it all - surely that's what worship should be about? Having a whole lot of fun giving glory to God. I knew that God was taking great delight in her enjoyment!

Another precious moment was as we were reading her Bible together she realised she knew the words to the song in the background 'We have this song at home' she said to me and we joined together singing.... 'Here I am to worship, here I am to bow down, here I am to say that you're my God. You're altogether lovely, altogether worthy, altogether wonderful to me.'

We continued to read her Bible, and as we read about humans being created in God's image she proclaimed 'God's like a magician, he made everything...' I explained to her that God was a whole lot more powerful than a magician because he spoke and the world was created and that God was different to a magician because He knows us and loves us all individually....we carried on chatting and I said 'even before you were born, God knew you and knew you were going to be born - he spoke and you were created...' Then she looked me right in the eyes and said 'that's the same for you, God spoke and you were created....'

Is this a new truth that I've never heard before - no.... did it feel like it when a 4 year old explained it to me? YES!

I'd seriously recommend having a chat with a child about God - their understanding is often way ahead of ours and we can learn so much from them. God spoke to me this morning through her child like faith and delight in God and I loved the fact that this morning He chose the lips of a 4 year old in a pretty red dress to bring me revelation.

Secular/Christian divide....

2009-12-01T23:50:00.002Z

So I've been thinking a bit about the differences in secular and Christian youth work recently. Mostly because I've been to a few meetings about the re-structuring of the youth service in my area. I think this is a really exciting thing. They want to get back to a service that actually serves the young people, which can only be a good thing.

The advantage for me as a youth worker based in a Church is that I get to just love the young people. I don't have any targets to meet or criteria to fulfil. The more and more I listen to 'good ideas' about dealing with young people I realise the answer is always going to be Jesus.

Who is going to stop knife crime? JESUS
How will insecurities and self hatred be dealt with in teenage girls? JESUS
How can young people know true acceptance? JESUS
Where can young people find fulfilment? JESUS
When everything falls apart for a young person who is left? JESUS
Who is going to stop unwanted pregnancies? JESUS
How can young people succeed? JESUS

I'm going to try and be as involved as I can in this re-shaping, I don't know yet whether I'll be able to mention the name of Jesus, but I certainly can show Him to a whole bunch of people who have never met Him and to some who haven't even heard of Him.

Feel free to pray for me!

Your Kingdom Come...

2009-11-29T17:21:00.003Z

This morning was an exciting morning at Church - more so than ever we were aware that God was wanting His Kingdom to break out. Earlier on in the week Paul (lead elder) had encouraged us to be asking God for words of knowledge for the Sunday morning.

We started by hearing testimonies from around the country, Paul shared stories from Southampton, Bedford and Canterbury. Following this a lady from CJC shared how in the summer she had been diagnosed with a bladder stone. She had been for scans back in September which clearly showed the stone. She was due to re-visit the hospital in December and also had more scans booked in for mid November. Prior to these scans she visited the healing rooms at a recent conference. The next day she realised the dull pain she was constantly experiencing had gone and she had loads more energy than she had for the past few months. The following Monday she had three different scans at the Hospital and when she saw the Dr he declared 'Who told you you had a bladder stone - there is not one here...' She explained about the previous scans and the only thing the Dr could suggest is that she had passed it without noticing. He did then admit that passing such a stone is very rare and passing one unknown is not really heard of - the lady was able to explain what she knew had happened - God had healed her!

A few of us shared words of knowledge, and we prayed for those who responded. One lady who I prayed for with a pain in her tooth said the pain totally disappeared, we then prayed for a pain in her chest. After praying the pain was still there but she was happy with the tooth healing so went and sat down. She later grabbed me over coffee and said that as she took a sip of her drink she heard a noise in her chest and the pain totally disappeared - she left this morning totally PAIN FREE.

I felt God speak to me about healing Migraines - someone else had the same word of knowledge. A member of the staff team came bounding up to us instantly saying 'it's me with the Migraines, it's me...!!' We prayed for him and he said he felt pressure behind his eyes release - we're waiting to hear that he is totally healed.

I was also able to pray with a lady whose name God had given me - I had no idea why, I just felt I should pray for a lady with this specific name. As I said it over the microphone I was so unsure, but a guest this morning (visiting from another church) came up to me, told me her name and I was able to pray for her and speak into her current (unknown to me) situation! She left this morning with a whole lot more than she'd expected - God is soooooo good!

Paul spoke this morning on being free from religiosity and rules - God has opened up the whole of His Kingdom for us to enjoy and explore - it should be fun and exciting. It certainly was this morning :)

Who Am I?

2009-11-24T18:16:00.003Z

Today I got sent an email requesting a short bio about myself for the church website and staff team board that goes up each Sunday. The person requesting wasn't trying to get me to take it so seriously, but it did get me thinking....

I've made a couple attempts to write something and drawn a blank. I think I'm struggling because I can't decide what to include and what to leave out. Should I go for a slighty quirky... 'let's tell people something a bit random about me, I'm a cool youth worker' blurb, or perhaps a more straight forward 'I do the youth work and I grew up in Southampton...' spiel...?

At the end of the day, none of that defines who I am, perhaps that's why I'm struggling.

I'd settle for something a long the lines of:

Sarah Dickenson: A total mess until the Grace of God rescued her, now living the dream, loved with an outrageous love by a totally good God - desires to see His Kingdom come on earth as it is in Heaven.

can't get enough of....

2009-11-23T23:09:00.003Z

Right at the moment I can't get enough of this song:

Perhaps it's not the usual sort of lyric I'd fall in love with, but you simply can't deny the anointing on this song, listen to it, sing it and let God minister to you through it :)

Thinking about youth work...

2009-11-22T16:46:00.002Z

I've just returned from a weekend away in Eastbourne at the youth work conference. Helping a friend out on her organisations stand meant I didn't get to a whole heap of sessions/seminars, but it did get me thinking a bit about youth work and the young people we work with.

As my friend and I chatted one night, we hit on something that I think is both shocking and provoking. My friend told me that some research has been done recently (can't remember exact statistic... will have to check..) that says a whole heap of kids are choosing to leave church aged 10. 10 year old children are opting out.

We chatted for a while about why this might be and I shared a story from a recent experience I'd had teaching that age group where they initially completely missed the point of the Scripture we were looking at. I was shocked - I couldn't believe how much they didn't get what the Bible was saying, or that it had anything to to teach us for today. My friend shared a story from her experience - a whole group of Children had no idea that the story of 'Joseph' and his coloured coat was in the Bible.

We talked about how so often youth and children's resources are written to teach young people ABOUT God. Even the more interactive stuff is written down in books, formulated and presented as a 123 ready made tool to enable young people to experience God.

I don't want to discount some of the amazing resources out there, but I do want to ensure that what I'm doing as a youth worker enables my young people to meet God powerfully. If they know about God but don't KNOW Him then why should they opt in? If I teach Bible stories in the same fictional, 'what a nice story' way I talk about Twilight or Harry Potter, why should they expect God to impact them now? If my only expectation is that they understand rather than experience then I'm doing them a disservice and I deserve to be moved on and shipped out.

We serve a LIVING God, if young people don't understand that he is NOW rather than 'then' we have a serious problem. I'm encouraged to be led more and more by the Holy Spirit with regards to what I teach and when I teach it. I want young people to treat the Bible as their daily bread, not a story book, I want young people to enter church expectant that they will meet with their God, not dragging their feet expecting to be bored, I want young people to change their worlds now, not wait to be world changers in the future.

How are we going to do all of this.... I'm not sure... maybe I'll write a book on it ;)

Confrontation and Honour

2009-11-16T09:00:00.000Z

"The goal of honour is to empower other people."

"People are at their best when they feel powerful"

"Everyone expects to live powerfully in the community - we all have value and power"

"The challenge is to live a vulnerable life in dangerous surroundings. "

"The testimony of heaven in us is that we love each other"

"How you treat people flows from what you believe to be true"

"the love in any relationship must be protected. Confrontation must keep in mind the love"

"Confrontation is about strategically applied pressure to expose areas that need strength and grace"

"Confrontation must happen in a relationship that is built on trust, if there is no trust, there should be no confrontation"

"We should be asking good questions, not making 'good' judgements"

"The kingdom is an internal government (the Holy Spirit IN us) not an external controlling government"

A context for Honour

2009-11-15T17:42:00.003Z

This weekend I went to a Conference about the Culture of Honour. Danny and Sheri Silk were speaking from Bethel Church in Redding.

Here are a few notes from the leaders day on Friday:

'When the gifts of Christ (ref 1 cor 12:27-28) are shoved into a government (church leadership structure) that can't handle it, that gifting won't function.'

On the 5 fold ministries:

Pastors focus on the flock, communicating to the church 'you're the most important thing to my ministry'

Teachers focus on the value of the Bible and are concerned with presenting truth that is right.

Evangelists focus on the lost.

Prophets want to make what is invisible visible, they focus on the Spirit realm.

Apostles focus on heavens blueprint. They are determined for 'Your Kingdom to come...'

He spoke on the need to have input from Apostolic leaders into the local church as they have the blueprint of heaven as their focus. 1 Cor 12:27-28 shows us the model of 'FIRST Apostles.....' this is the structure we should follow if we desire Heaven on Earth. The governmental structure we should be looking for is this (priorities in brackets)

Apostles (Heaven)

Prophets (Spirit Realm)

Teachers (Understanding the Kingdom)

Workers of Miracles (Supernatural Activity)

He helpfully noted that this is NOT a 5 fold corporate ladder!

What has God done this week?

2009-11-11T23:14:00.002Z

InDeep is our Wednesday night group for those in years 5-7 who are serious about getting to know God better. It's an exciting place to be and God turns up powerfully each week.

We always start by asking the children 'what has God done this week...' here are two stories from today:

One of the lads in the group injured his wrist a few weeks back, he'd been to the doctors, followed their advice, but it didn't seem to be getting much better. Then he and his mum realised they hadn't prayed for it yet, so they prayed and told the pain to go. The next morning he woke up totally pain free and the wrist has been fine since!!

Another girl told a story of God protecting her mum this week. She had left her car parked on the roadside to go into a doctors surgery. As she was at the reception she heard a massive crash, walking outside she saw her car 100 yards further up the road and smashed into a tree. A moving car had crashed into the back of it and her car was totally writen off. Had the mum been back at her car 1 minute earlier she would have been in the car during the time of the collision. We gave thanks to God for his protection!

What has God done in your life this week?

God uses Ready Salted!

2009-11-08T15:27:00.002Z

A new Christian at CJC shared an amazing story this week. She's been suffering serious pain recently due to a cyst on one of her ovaries. Having recently come to know Jesus (2 weeks ago...!) she asked her cell to pray for her. As they prayed another lady got a strong sense that she should eat a packet of Ready Salted Walkers Crisps... (random!)

The next day and wanting to do what God had seemingly said the new Christian spent a good amount of time hunting for the specific walkers crisps. Eventually after visiting a few shops she found some and ate them. Two hours later the pain had totally gone!!!....... This isn't the best bit!

Previously her cell had been praying that the cyst would burst so she could avoid an operation. A day or so after the crisp incident the cyst burst of it's own accord. She visited the Dr who sent her for a scan which revealed she was TOTALLY HEALTHY, every trace of the cyst had GONE and she was given a clean bill of health!!!

How good is God?!!

Raised With Christ: How the Resurrection changes everything

2009-11-03T09:00:00.000Z

Adrian Warnock, arguably one of the most famous Christian Bloggers, has written a book on the Resurrection and it's available to PRE ORDER now!

A whole bunch of people have reviewed it and have nothing but the highest praise for it - check out his blog for some of their comments.

I'm going to read it and so should you!

Here is Adrian talking about it in his own words:

Raised With Christ: How The Resurrection Changes Everything from Adrian Warnock on Vimeo.

Most challenging song of the year award:

2009-11-02T21:15:00.002Z

I first heard an unmastered version of this song back in May this year. From the start of the song to the end I found myself balling my eyes out - the challenge was plain and simple: everything we do must come from a place of love, that's how Jesus lived His life and we must do the same.

Listen to it and let it challenge you too!

Red coats, green hoodies and stationers!

2009-11-01T18:44:00.012Z

I was asked to speak a bit about treasure hunting with the youth in Orpington this afternoon which was followed by us all hitting the streets for about an hour. Armed with some notes by seasoned treasure hunter Wendy Mann and plenty of stories from Newday Global and other hunts I've been on I was excited to be spending the afternoon with the guys and girls there.

After a quick briefing we split into 4 teams and headed out.

I think throughout the course of the afternoon I spoke to almost every person on Orpington High Street wearing a red coat! Some were more successful than others. One lady we spoke to didn't match any other clues but asked what church we were from. When we told her it was 'Hope Church' she said 'oh my neighbours go to that church.... do you know the....' One of the team members was able to have a bit of a chat with her about their mutual friends... God is clearly on her case! We later prayed that she would talk to her neighbours about her encounter.

Later on we met another guy who was wearing a red coat. As we approached he said 'it's OK, I've already spoken to two others up there... I don't match any of your clues...' He'd just left another one of the teams. As we chatted he was surprised to see the clue bag pipes on one of the treasure maps... he was from Scotland. We had a quick chat and he exclaimed 'I'm going to tell my wife about this, she's religious you see....' We said goodbye to him, a lovely man who was slightly taken about that he'd been picked out by God twice on a Sunday afternoon!

Another lady wearing a green hoodie asked us to pray about a major job interview she had on Tuesday and we also got to pray with a lady in (another!) red coat with back pain. She said it felt a bit better afterwards but was in a rush so we didn't get to pray again. (doh!)

One of the other teams had the clues purple scarf, WH Smith, stationers and butterflies between them. As they were heading back to the church centre they spotted a lady heading into WH Smith wearing a purple scarf. They patiently waited outside until she walked out of the shop, straight pass them and into Rymans.... another stationers...!!! At this point a double decker bus drove past with butterflies on it. They knew this was God so waited again and were able to chat to her about how God had singled her out this afternoon, she was clearly blessed by their words about God's love for her as an individual.

Another team this afternoon met an atheist guy in the park who spent most of his days there feeding the ducks. They were able to talk about the incredible adventure following Jesus is and were able to pray with him 3 times for various things. Amazingly he wouldn't take a card about Church because he was an atheist... he was however happy to receive prayer and listen to the team explain what Jesus meant to them... awesome stuff!

Again I was struck by how once you get over the initial fear and the first set back, treasure hunting is such an easy way to get out on the streets and tell people about Jesus. It shouldn't be difficult to communicate God's love to a broken and hurting world. Treasure hunting seems to be a great tool God is blessing at the moment to enable His Kingdom to come on earth as it is in Heaven.

picture this: summer 09

2009-08-24T21:36:00.007+01:00

Trying to be bit a bit more bold.....

2009-06-25T12:52:00.002+01:00

Blogging is quickly becoming something I forget to do...again...!

Anyway, this is a little story from the past week.

Over the past 18 months I've been trying to be a bit bolder at stepping out in what I think God is telling me to do. I've asked God to give me opportunities to step out and sometimes I've bombed and bottled it and sometimes I've somehow managed to put my fears aside and step out. Some of which has been documented on this very blog.

If I'm honest the 'stepping out-ness' had gone a bit quiet, for a vast amount of reasons I'd just stopped expecting to have to step out much, especially publically, with people who don't know Jesus.

Anyway last Friday I was very excited to be purchasing an iphone from the o2 store in Croydon. I'd previously been in there to talk about tariffs etc and as I got into the queue on Friday I caught the eye of the bloke I'd spoken to before. He was so helpful and went straight out the back, picked up the handset I wanted, bought it out, allowed me to jump the queue and just started sorting it all out for me, much to my amazement and probably to the annoyance of the people ahead of me in the queue.

So anyway, I join the o2 bloke and it takes him a while to sort out the paper work etc. We have a jolly old chat about the iphone and various other stuff. He tells me his wife has an iphone etc etc. We're basically chatting like friends. Now all through this conversation I'm noticing he has a brace thing on his wrist. 'He's hurt his wrist' I think to myself. My next thought is 'If I was in a bold mood, I might offer to pray for his wrist..... but I'm not, so I won't.' Then he starts telling me about his wrist, how much it hurts, how the Dr was rubbish and didn't really help at all etc etc... I remember thinking 'OK God, I hear you, I hear where you're taking this, and I'm choosing to bottle it right now...' Our conversation continues and he asks where I work... 'I work for a church I reply, with young people...' He pretty much ignores that and moves on to do a credit check.

It turns out there is a 15 minute wait for the credit check because everyone is getting a new iphone on the same day I am. So there we are with another 15 minutes to talk. He continues to tell me how the pain in his wrist was so bad the night before he couldn't sleep. In my head my conversation with God goes like this 'I can still see what you're trying to do, but I just can't today... I'm still choosing to bottle it...'

Mr o2 continues talking about his wrist and I kind of feel God say something a long the lines of 'we can go on like this as long as you'd like, or you could just offer to pray.' So finally after about 40 minutes I give in and managed to muster some line about the Church I go to seeing people healed and could I pray for his wrist....? His response 'yeah sure, as long as I don't have to, I'm not into the whole religion thing...but if you think it might work.....'

Then the conversation quickly changes and we're back to the nitty gritty of sorting out the iphone. I think I'm off the hook... eventually he hands over the contract, phone and everything else and I think 'oh well, at least I offered to pray, I'll pray by proxy and maybe he'll get healed, he's clearly not up for me praying and I don't want to be pushy...' and then he says to me 'so what do I have to do if you're going to pray for me, do I just take this off (pointing at the brace thing)?' I'm thinking 'hmmmm...there really is no way out of this now, I'm just going to have to go with this....'

I encourage him to do so, I hold his wrist and then tell the pain to go in the name of Jesus. In the middle of a packed o2 shop, with his colleagues looking at me like I'm a loon...something of the fear of man was broken in me.

I don't actually know if he's been healed or not, he thanked me and we shock hands and I said 'let me know if that gets better...' I don't really know why I said that as really he has no way of letting me know....!!! I'm wondering about plucking up the courage to go back in there and ask him.... at the moment though I'm sitting on the 'chicken' side of the fence!

Isn't God good though... he chooses to use frail, nervous, 'chicken' people to bring his Kingdom on earth as it is in heaven... I guess this is just a little story to illustrate that we're all on a journey with this which has mountains and valleys, sometimes we get it right, sometimes we get it wrong, sometimes we're just plain stubborn but God perseveres with us, all of the time God believes in us far me than we believe in ourselves, I'm so grateful I serve a God of second, third, fourth....(and the rest) chances.!

Lessons I never thought I would learn.

2009-06-09T22:06:00.003+01:00

Life is a bit odd at the moment.

I'm in the process of learning lessons I never thought I would learn.

The thing is, I think we get so used to living our lives in a certain way that we don't expect there to be other options. At the moment I'm aware that God is teaching me about new ways of doing things. Specifically He's speaking to me about new ways of thinking. I've been so stuck in my old ways of thinking that my head is really struggling to get used to this new way.

The Bible tells us to 'be transformed by the renewing of your mind' and that's what I'm praying will happen for me. As God renews my mind I will be transformed, but equally as I actively seek to let my mind be renewed, God will do the transforming. It's tricky stuff!

God is revealing so much to me about this new way of thinking that I can barely take it in or process it...maybe that's the point. The fact that this new way of thinking is so different to what I'm used to means that it is going to come as some what of a shock to my system - and it is!

It's not really a new revelation, it's more that the truth of the revelation is sinking in. On the one hand it's really simple and on the other hand it's the most complex truth and completely incomprehensible.

Nothing I do changes the intensity of God's love for me. he is passionate about me always and about having a relationship with me.

Did you get that... absolutely NOTHING.

I was speaking to a young person today and she said something like 'it doesn't make sense that God would love me because I know what I'm like and I'm not all that' I had to agree with her and say 'yep, it doesn't make sense, but that doesn't mean it's not true.' We then had a great discussion about how we need to know and live in the good of what God thinks about us.

I'm so thankful that the TRUTH is not based on me or my feelings, but instead it's based on the one who never changes - where would we be without Him?!

So bear with me as I learn this lesson...it's going to take me a while.....!!!

IN JESUS

2009-05-29T00:54:00.004+01:00

It is no secret to anyone who has known me for more than about a day that I love a certain Brighton based band who go by the name of Phatfish.

Their new album is due to be released on June 4th (the day after my birthday coincidently...!!) and until the 1st June they're GIVING AWAY a free download of the title track 'In Jesus'. You really would be a fool not to follow this link right away, download it and then play it on repeat - it will do you good!

After you've done that you should follow this link, book yourself a ticket for the nearest gig to you and count down the days until it arrives with glee. I can promise that you won't be disappointed.

Following that you should set a reminder on your phone to purchase the new album - I've had a sneak preview listen and it is simply outstanding. I've said it before and I'm likely to say it again 'you just can't beat a bit of Phatfish.'

Go enjoy the free download.... NOW!!!!!

playing a bit of a game with God

2009-05-05T22:23:00.004+01:00

So today I was on my way back from a lovely lunch and I had to go a bit of a different way. The road that I usually use is closed at the moment and I didn't really know what other way to go. I had a rough idea but wasn't at all confident and good old TomTom wasn't with me! I heard God say 'just trust me, listen to my voice and go where I tell you.' I replied 'hmm.....but what if I hear you wrong' God told me 'it's no big deal, just listen and go where I tell you.'

So I thought I'd give it a go, I'm always up for learning more about hearing God's voice. The funny thing was that God was telling me to go in what I thought was the 'wrong' direction. I was sort of arguing with Him in my head, but funnily enough (!) He guided me all the way back to a road I recognised and from where I could navigate myself home.

God is so interested in every area of our lives - even when we're not sure how to get home! Why not play a game with God this week - how can you practice hearing His voice?

A cool story: God heals today!

2009-05-04T09:11:00.003+01:00

Twice a month on a Thursday morning I head off to 'regional leaders' this is where anyone with a leadership role in a local NewFrontiers church get together for worship, prayer, encouragement and doughnuts.

A couple of months ago we spent some time praying for the different churches represented. One of the lead elders couldn't be there as he was pretty ill. He'd been having problems with his voice for a really long time, he'd be back and forward to the hospital and they'd given him a date for an operation. He could barely talk and had been told by the Dr's that his voice would probably never be the same again - not so good for a preacher.

As a group we knew this wasn't what God wanted for this guy, so we prayed. Then someone had an idea - let's pray for something and send it back as a kind of a 'we're praying for you sign' and we'll believe for a miraculous healing.

Don't get me wrong, this is a bit out there. None of us had a theology of praying for hankies, but it just seemed like a God moment and the right thing to do. Nobody had a hankie either, so we prayed over a paper towel and sent it back with the elders.

That night the guy slept with the paper towel under his pillow. He woke up the next morning TOTALLY HEALED!! He went back to the hospital who have now refused to operate on him because THERE IS NOTHING WRONG!!

I only heard the end of this story yesterday at church - God is so good and His Kingdom is breaking out all over the place! More Lord!

A plea to Anon

2009-05-02T16:31:00.004+01:00

I read this article earlier on in the week. It got me pretty frustrated, mostly because I think a proper understanding of the Scriptures with regards to men and women makes a MASSIVE difference on this issue.

So here's my response:

Dear Anon! I am gutted that you feel like this and want to shout at the top of my lungs - IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE LIKE THIS!! I have to be honest and say that I've found a different approach has kept me from ever experiencing the feelings you've expressed. The different approach I'm talking about is making a conscious decision to submit myself to the male eldership over me and trust them in their God given authority. I've found this approach ridiculously releasing.

I don't have to worry, or strive, or push my agenda because I know the guys in authority over me believe in me, know my gifts and will honour and protect me in every situation. I don't feel like I'm held back, or pushed to the sidelines in fact I'm able to step out with amazing security and freedom. Everything I do is submitted to the elders of the Church I work for and my covering comes from them - I'm not afraid to say that I think submission is key. I wholeheartedly believe eldership is male and that women should be released into EVERY other leadership role going (which would include preaching). I think God has created male and female differently and that includes different roles.

As a part of Christ's Church we're called to submit to GODLY eldership, (whether we're male or female) the more and more I've embraced this the more and more released I've been to use my gifts in the local church, regionally and nationally.

I'm sorry this hasn't been your experience, and bad male leaders can make the life of a gifted women a nightmare - I sympathise with you and share my experience as an encouragement - there are men out there who when secure in their own gifting will do everything they can to release young leaders (male or female) in theirs. Sarah.

Meeting Jesus for the first time (a rather long blog!)

2009-04-30T18:33:00.004+01:00

Inspired by Adrian and lacking in any ideas myself as to what to blog about, I thought I'd take some time to share the story of how I first met Jesus.

I grew up with a pretty standard 'English' understanding of God for a child of the 80's. I never questioned the existence of God, to be honest I never really thought much about it. Christmas was about Jesus being born, Easter was about Jesus dying, and that was it. Some people went to church but that was because they were a bit over enthusiastic, but if that's what they wanted to do it was fine by me. My family didn't go to church apart from the standard weddings and funerals.

Everything changed when I was about 13. My eldest brother (at this point he would've been about 22) started going to the local Baptist Church. This was wierd. Why would he suddenly start going to Church? It turned out his best friend had invited him to his own baptism and my brother wanted to find out more after attending that service. He started to make friends and church became a regular part of his week. To his 13 year old sister this was all a bit strange.

Eventually he started telling me about the youth group and encouraging me to go. I was not interested, the last thing I wanted to do was go to church. After much persuasion I started to attend the Friday night social stuff the church put on for young people. I found out it wasn't actually that bad and I became a regular attender of anything social. Occasionally they would sneak in something about Jesus (this is how I saw it anyway) and me and my friends would laugh and jeer and pretend like we didn't care - I just couldn't work out why these people were so bothered about Jesus, they seemed almost obsessed with Him, like He really mattered to them.

I continued to enjoy the social aspects of the youth group but cringed every time God or Jesus was mentioned. I'd happily mock the Christians, laugh at their songs and dismiss everything they said, I liked that the leaders were fun and made an effort to get to know me, but I didn't like them pushing their beliefs on me. I wasn't interested.

The summer after I turned 14 the youth leaders announced they were taking the youth on two camps, one was a weekend 'Christian' music festival down the road in Ringwood, the other was much further away in Shropshire for a whole 7 days. Both would be lots of fun, and would have some sort of Christian content. I decided to go to both, I'd been avoiding anything Christian so far and was well up for a weekend and a week away with my youth group friends - plenty of fun to be had!

The music festival was a disaster. It's fair to say I hated it. A friend and I tried our hardest not to say 'Oh my God' or 'Jesus' as swear words the whole weekend as we felt pretty un-Christian amongst all the Christian people. We didn't do very well. We stayed on our camp site and avoided any of the celebrations and gigs, there was way to much Jesus stuff going on for our liking. One evening we decided to go down to the main meeting and sit on the very outside, but unfortunately from the front the worship leader told people to get into prayer groups, myself and a friend were pulled (quite innocently) into a prayer group and didn't have a clue what was going on. My friend and I felt scared and confused so ran back to the camp, packed down our tent and demanded to be taken home. I told the youth leader I hated him and all his happy clappy friends.

In his wisdom the youth leader didn't let us go home, he tried to explain what had happen at the main session, we calmed down and spent the rest of the weekend on the campsite, not venturing anywhere near anymore Christian stuff. In my head I had decided never to go to anything to do with the Church again after that weekend, I would survive the rest of the weekend and leave the youth group forever - God had other plans!

After returning from the music festival my parents picked up I wasn't right. I told them I didn't want to go on the next camp (called 'MCV') but they had paid the full amount for me to go and weren't exactly excited by loosing the fee they'd paid. So although I didn't want to go I knew I had to go on ANOTHER camp with church people in a few weeks time. I put it to the back of my mind and enjoyed a few weeks without anything Church-y. No-one mentioning Jesus, I could blaspheme without offending anyone and most of all I didn't feel awkward.

Mid August arrived and I was all packed, my older brother was also going on the same camp - he was more enthusiastic than me! I moaned the whole way there, I didn't want to get to know anymore 'Bible bashers' I wouldn't listen to what they say and I certainly wasn't going to join their wierd little gang.

Something changed the minute I started to meet the leaders on this camp. Most of them were unknown to me. They had different accents and they seemed to behave in a very odd way. They were nice, they were friendly, they didn't hate me for my bad attitude and they seemed so happy to be alive. I couldn't match what I thought about Christians and how these people were acting. In hindsight I can only say that the Holy Spirit was opening my eyes up to the difference Jesus made in their lives, and the truth was I wanted it.

I didn't want to admit that I was finding this Christian stuff a bit more interesting. I couldn't work out why my thoughts were beginning to change towards Jesus and why I had so many questions that I wanted answers to. Previously I hadn't cared - but now I did. Every evening and morning there was a short service, suddenly I liked the singing and was really interested to hear what the preacher had to say. I loved watching the leaders worship - what was it they were so passionate about, and why wasn't I?

I decided to speak to my room mate who was a bit older than me. I knew she was a Christian, but I didn't find her wierd - just the right person! I wanted to know what it sounded like when God spoke, I wanted to know how I would know if God spoke to me. Why was everyone so bothered about Jesus? What's all this talk about sin? We stayed up chatting 'til about 3am, me firing questions and her faithfully answering.

That morning I knew I had to do something about the heat I could feel in my heart. I knew I was about to change. I felt nervous and excited, I knew I wanted to know Jesus for myself, I knew I was about to 'become' the thing that I had thought was so stupid for so long. I didn't really understand what being a Christian meant, but I knew I wanted to be one!

After almost speaking to one of the leaders about 4 times that day eventually by mid afternoon I managed to grab one of the leaders and say 'I think I want to become a Christian' we spoke for a bit and then we prayed. That was it. Everything had changed, yet nothing was different. I felt like a weight had been lifted and I couldn't stop smiling. I remember going to see my brother and saying 'I've become a Christian' his response was 'but you don't like them' I responded 'I am one now.' I remember going to see the couple who had so faithfully led the youth group back at home - they were as shocked as I was, but I knew it was the right thing to do.

At the time I would've said I had chosen to give my life to Christ, and to an extent that's true - but what really happened is that for whatever reason (GRACE alone) God chose me before the foundation of the world - that week in August 1996 the Holy Spirit revealed the wonder of the Gospel to me and I responded to the call that was tugging on my heart from the minute we drove through the gates of that conference centre.

It's not surprising really that God has called me into the work that was so significant in my salvation. I will forever be grateful for the faithful witness of youth workers who loved Jesus and loved me as a young person, they loved me enough to let me work it out for myself and they showed me the difference Jesus makes.

So Rog, Ali, Jen, Hayley, Helen and Andy - thank you for showing me Jesus and leading me to him.

Sozo moments

2009-04-08T18:50:00.003+01:00

To be honest I don't have a lot to blog about at the moment. I've been pretty busy over the past month or so, not leaving a lot of space to think about blogging in any sort of substantial way. I wish I was a better blogger....!!

It's the easter holidays at the moment and I'm using the quiteness that comes from regular stuff not happening for a while to catch up on stuff I've been wanting to do for a while. One such thing is listening to the Sozo training CD's.

Sozo is a ministry that has been birthed out of Bethel Church in Redding. CJC is tentatively beginning to put a team together that will be able to offer Sozos, we're still very much in the early stages, but we're so excited to see the freedom it's already bringing to people.

Sozo is the Greek word for 'salvation, healing and deliverance'

Currently I'm working my way through 7 CD's of basic training...then there's another 8 CD's of advanced training. It's serious stuff!

So what is Sozo? Straight from the Sozo website (linked above)

Sozo is an inner healing/deliverance ministry
Sozo is simple, fast, Spirit led and effective
Sozo finds issues in minutes instead of years
Sozo helps heal your relationship with God to enable you to fulfill your destiny

I guess for me, the exciting thing about Sozo (having had a Sozo about a month ago) is really that it's all about you talking to God about what He wants to do in your life. The other people in the room act as guides to take you through some of that stuff and spot where maybe forgiveness or deliverance might be needed. It's a very releasing experience and I can highly recommend it!