Left Coast Unitarian

Anniversary Joy

2008-05-16T20:54:00.000-07:00

C and I celebrate our 14th anniversary today. We will go out tomorrow but we managed to sneak a little picnic lunch this afternoon. Ironically, we both mentioned how much it seems like just yesterday we got together and yet we both feel like we have always been together. It's been a real joy and seems unbelievable that we have been together for 14 years.

In the past year we have started running together and have only managed to grow closer. We're both close to the same size we were two kids ago when we met now too. Its been great to grow into a whole new level of physical activity together. Its been a hard week of training for us this week. I am very proud that C is still up and at it after her big half marathon two weeks ago.

C has accomplished so much in 14 years. Two kids born at home and a Masters Degree. She also delivered dozens of babies during this time. I finished an MSEd and am very close to finishing my MDiv now too right after she finishes her Family Nurse Practitioner.

Great summer and thinking about exercise

2007-09-03T20:52:00.001-07:00

It has been a very long time since I have written here. I have spent most of this summer training for a triathlon and coordinating a summer project and RE for a local congregation.

It was very nice to get some media coverage for our work this summer. UUCSM was a great place to work and a great place to go to church this summer.

Just about every day (except for some Sundays) I have been working out. Saturdays have been coached with a team and the rest of the week has been on our own.

As someone who grew up during the 70s California fitness craze, I have always had mixed feelings about this level of exercise and sport. I grew up around several families "widowed" by active participants or passive consumers of sports. So I have tended to think of working out or higher level recreational athletics as somewhat self indulgent. There are a lot of things I could be doing with those 10 or so hours per week I have spent even if I've lost 30 pounds (my weight gain from two kids and seminary :)) and weigh the same I did when I graduated from high school twenty years ago but with a smaller waist.

The question I have been considering is how to decide when exercise can be good or even sacred versus when exercise becomes idolatry or self-absorption. When people hear that I am training for my first triathlon, they often ask if I am raising money for a cause. Perhaps they have heard recent ads for Team In Training from the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society which is doing a great job of getting people trained for their first triathlon, marathon or half marathon while raising money for a good cause. Our local triathlon is a benefit for the work of the local Rotary but not particularly charity oriented. I think most people would feel it was a good thing if I was out raising money this way or that this is one way that exercise would be judged a priori a good thing. Perhaps the health benefits for myself and the role model it gives my kids also functions this way.

The other thing I did this summer was complete a course on early church history, with a heavy dose of critiques of Gnosticism and the influence of Augustine. The old stereotype of the shallow, self-absorbed yuppie at the gym, combined with a heavy dose of "Christian" body suspicion instigated this line of questioning for me. In Christian terms (via Irenaeus)if the body is good enough for the incarnation there must be something good about it.

But how do we devise a theological language that valorizes exercise or physical activity that does not denigrate some people with bodies or conditions that might make this difficult or impossible? Being influenced by Fat Is A Feminist Issue and writings about ability and access I have tended to avoid talking about exercise and fitness. I generally don't talk about the training I am doing though it has been a lot of work and something of an accomplishment.

We Arrive at GA with a great food accident

2007-06-21T23:49:00.000-07:00

So after 12 hours of driving we arrive at GA just in time for the Service of the Living Tradition.

By luck, a wrong turn put us on to a detour and we found the fantastic Blue Nile Cafe Ethiopian Restaurant at 2221 NE Broadway. The food was spicy and excellent, with fluffy soft injera and flavors as good as any Ethiopian restaurant we have tried.

The poor kids ended up going to the SLT after a 12 hour car ride. They did great, but it was clearly too late for them. I told them I will have to get them vegan doughnuts at Voodoo Doughnut tommorrow.

The 5 year old was excited when he recognized Bill Sinkford from the UU World magazines at our house. It was very nice to run into some Starr King and PCD friends as well.

I enjoyed the SLT tonight and was very happy to be there with my family. I am starting to enjoy the tradition of it and allowing myself to look forward to getting preliminary fellowship as well. I liked the content of Bill and Barbara's sermon and their general preaching style. I'm not sure they would have gotten away with being so self-referential in my homiletics class though.

Even though the service still seemed long, it was disappointing to not have the traditional practice of people walking across the stage to receive the hand of fellowship.

I think I will start tommorrow with Dr. Amina Wadud giving the Starr King President's Lecture. I have heard lots of good things about her work on gender and Islam. The rest of the day I will attempt to focus on family ministry.

Smells Like School Spirit or Be True To Your School Part II?

2007-05-30T22:46:00.000-07:00

Reverend Peacebang, seems to have kicked off something of a snarkfest towards the Thomas Starr King School for the Ministry and does not approve of some of the responses from students of said school.

Now I have been a student at Starr King for what seems like forever. My work in Transylvania has delayed my graduation an extra year. You won't generally see me talk like a true believer, but I am fully in support of the work that the school is doing in terms of social justice. I will intentionally avoid using the shorthand terms that are used to describe this work here, because I know for some readers it would feel like you need a secret decoder ring to interpret.

For me the actual matter of dispute is fairly simple. If a person of color, especially an elder, suggests that a particular term is not the most inviting way to title or describe a gathering, I will take them at their word absent a good deal of evidence.

This is a reiteration of a point I have made here before. If someone tells you that a particular term is offensive because it was used as a slur against them or as part of a system of oppression, you generally don't have much of a case for trying to dispute it. This may not make for a perfect system, but to me, it is common (or sadly perhaps less common that I might want to think) courtesy.

This is much less fun than railing about political correctness or a rousing game of "poke fun at the hippies" but it generally has served me well.

Comment moderation

2007-05-23T09:51:00.001-07:00

Sheesh. I've done two posts now for the first time in months and I have had to turn on comment moderation to deal with the diatribes of someone's vendetta against their former church. Either that, or I am dedicated to the censorship of North America's last great free thinker heretic.

I have only ever deleted comment spam and clearly irrelevant comments designed to drive traffic away and gain attention. I think you will still find some of these comments in the archives.

On a more substantive note, I think it is important to reiterate that someone can be your ally without necessarily being just as enthusiastic about whatever it is you bring up at any given time.

I'm reminded of my time as a young leftist when I would be at meetings and members of the Socialist Workers Party (or was it the Socialist Labor Party or the Workers Vanguard or the Revolutionary Communist Party?) would soak up meeting time talking about whatever issue they thought was most important, repeating each other's comments about the same thing. Usually they were valid issues but not relevant to why people were getting together at that particular time.

Here where I live there is an older activist, who I generally agree with, who insists on going to any progressive meeting (usually environmental organizations) and reading long diatribes. His analysis of contemporary problems is pretty good, but his poor social skills (As Douglas Copeland describes a character in Jpod, he has now inside voice) make him impossible to work with. Most of the people I do work with locally feel like they agree with him but do not want to be anywhere near him or associated with him in any way because of the way he carries on. And this is totally in spite of the fact that we all basically agree with him.

I mention this because it seems a lot like the stereotype of the crusty humanist decades long social justice committee chair that I have heard people spin stories about.

Church Technology Planning

2007-05-23T09:07:00.001-07:00

I was recently contacted by some old colleagues to assist schools with creating their technology plans. For some schools, the technology plan is just another paperwork requirement to get different kinds of grants. For others, the technology plan can actually serve a useful role in guiding how technology can be used to help students learn, teachers teach and administrators administrate.

I'm wondering if a similar planning process would be helpful for churches. A good technology plan might include a built in replacement policy for equipment (ideally a plan for regular upgrades and a three to five year replacement cycle). Also useful is a policy for dealing with donated equipment. I've seen so many junk computers dumped on schools by well meaning people, and have seen similar equipment in church offices. (As an aside, please don't send old computers to Transylvania. By the time you pay to ship them, you might as well wire money to buy equipment there or in Hungary.)

My son just got back from a district youth con. The youth I drove mentioned the wireless internet available at the host church. How might we plan strategically to use online resources in religious education effectively? What sort of training is needed and what are the minimum resources necessary to be successful? And what are the potential downsides?

As an educational technologist, I suppose I am at first glance somewhat skeptical of technology at church. But it seems to me that the level of technology in each congregation is increasing, and the minimum requirements for acceptable production values in our society are getting more complex. We must not let the cart get ahead of the horse however. As Einstein put it, "The perfection of means and confusion of ends characterizes our age."

Sermon inspired by Genesis 15

2007-05-22T10:38:00.000-07:00

Genesis 15:1-30
15After these things the word of the Lord came to Abram in a vision, ‘Do not be afraid, Abram, I am your shield; your reward shall be very great.’ 2But Abram said, ‘O Lord God, what will you give me, for I continue childless, and the heir of my house is Eliezer of Damascus?’* 3And Abram said, ‘You have given me no offspring, and so a slave born in my house is to be my heir.’ 4But the word of the Lord came to him, ‘This man shall not be your heir; no one but your very own issue shall be your heir.’ 5He brought him outside and said, ‘Look towards heaven and count the stars, if you are able to count them.’ Then he said to him, ‘So shall your descendants be.’ 6And he believed the Lord; and the Lord * reckoned it to him as righteousness.
7 Then he said to him, ‘I am the Lord who brought you from Ur of the Chaldeans, to give you this land to possess.’ 8But he said, ‘O Lord God, how am I to know that I shall possess it?’ 9He said to him, ‘Bring me a heifer three years old, a female goat three years old, a ram three years old, a turtle-dove, and a young pigeon.’ 10He brought him all these and cut them in two, laying each half over against the other; but he did not cut the birds in two. 11And when birds of prey came down on the carcasses, Abram drove them away.
12 As the sun was going down, a deep sleep fell upon Abram, and a deep and terrifying darkness descended upon him. 13Then the Lord * said to Abram, ‘Know this for certain, that your offspring shall be aliens in a land that is not theirs, and shall be slaves there, and they shall be oppressed for four hundred years; 14but I will bring judgement on the nation that they serve, and afterwards they shall come out with great possessions. 15As for yourself, you shall go to your ancestors in peace; you shall be buried in a good old age. 16And they shall come back here in the fourth generation; for the iniquity of the Amorites is not yet complete.’
17 When the sun had gone down and it was dark, a smoking fire-pot and a flaming torch passed between these pieces. 18On that day the Lord made a covenant with Abram, saying, ‘To your descendants I give this land, from the river of Egypt to the great river, the river Euphrates, 19the land of the Kenites, the Kenizzites, the Kadmonites, 20the Hittites, the Perizzites, the Rephaim, 21the Amorites, the Canaanites, the Girgashites, and the Jebusites.’

I’m not here to say what you are worried about. I might know and I might not. But I can know that there are worries to keep you up at night and worries to make you sick in the gut. I can see it in your eyes and I know we’ve all been there. And for the most part, we have all been there alone, despite any friends, family or mates we may have.

Now our hippie friends may say that we just need to “trust the universe,” but for a lot of people, especially people who have less power and privilege, life in our global economy is not really trustworthy. Hard work and a positive attitude are not enough. And it is awful had and lonely when your whole life or even an entire socioeconomic system seems arrayed against you.

Now Abram (you know Abram, he becomes Abraham, the father of the Jews, Christians and Muslims later) isn’t even alone. He believes in G-d and G-d even talks to him directly. Even in the personal company of G-d Abram still has to ask what do you mean? How is this going to work? I’m still worried. And even after G-d shows Abram, “Look I’m G-d its no problem for me and I can make it work and it will be fine” Abram still has to ask “How do I know your promise is true?” Abram has doubts twice even with G-d there to talk to him and show him and make a deal with him.

So how are we supposed to feel in our times of need and doubt? You are not alone and your sense of despair is perfectly natural. But you need hope to survive..

When we lose hope we begin to shut down. We become increasingly isolated and withdraw from the social bonds that sustain us. Wealthier people may retreat to their high profile SUVs and gate garded communities while the most despondent of all social classes may ultimately retreat to the numb comfort of drugs and alcohol or even suicide.

Socially when we lose hope we become less and less involved in our world. We develop so-called compassion fatigue and a “let the devil take the hindmost” mentality. In our own suffering we succumb to the most reactionary kinds of thinking about the sufferings of our neighbors and others near and far. We lose trust in the ability of people to work together and solve problems collectively and retreat to rugged individualism.

Religiously, we lose the ability to make sense of our world and wonder how we will make it. We lose connection to our sense of the divine and the holy connections between us. When we suffer we no longer feel the blossoming promise of life, and forget that while we all must suffer sometimes, some are made to suffer more than their natural share through a variety of bigotry and injustices.

Sometimes as modern religious liberals we try to look down on people with traditional beliefs. We say they just want easy answers. But look at Abram, even from the mouth of G-d direct to his ear the answer is not easy. It may take 4 generations and it may not work out exactly the way you expect. And like Job later even if you do everything right it may not be easy. And you will doubt and despair. And the writers of the ancient Hebrew holy scrolls knew this. Doubt was not invented by Nietzche or 20th century liberals. And hopelessness is not some new postmodern condition.

Too often as religious liberals we strut around with a great deal of pride in our doubts. And we intentionally ignore that we live in a system designed to break us down into the smallest possible units until we are reduced to passive individual consumers, defined by hierarchy and what we buy.

The most explicit instance of how this works in our society is in prison. A friend who spent several years in state prison used to explain that the worst thing you could do in prison is look like you were bonding with someone. Immediately you would find yourself separated, whether it was a songbird in the trees or an incarcerated sister that looked to you as an elder. Even when prisoners are not literally in solitary confinement, their lives were structured to create an emotional solitary confinement. And it is this solitary confinement in our prisons and in our torture chambers in Guantanamo and the Middle East that is the best metaphor for examining how our society can function to make our suffering worse.

In many societies, past and present, a much stronger sense of kinship and extended families exists. In the village I served in Transylvania, every elder is an auntie or uncle. When people are sick, a neighbor brings food, chops wood or tends animals. And most houses had at least two or three generations living together. Now in our society, those of us with a little more live in big empty houses, while poor people can not be seen in groups larger than two without being called a gang. Everyone must have their own house and own possessions. And everyone struggles to keep up with appearances, until they fall through the frayed strands of our safety net and end up on the street, that same street that so many of us are only one paychecks and a dead or pissed off relative away from.

A recent study in American Sociological Review based on interviews with nearly 1500 people by the National Opinion Research Center at the University of Chicago states that 25% of Americans feel that there is no one close with whom they confide in about things that are important to them. Eighty percent of respondents confided solely in family. This study has been continuing since 1985, when the average person reported 3 people to confide in (compared to 2 in 2004) and only 57% of people relied solely on family members to confide in.

In a society that is designed to tear us apart in good times and bad, our most radical act is to strengthen the bonds between us across all our social divisions. We must actively resist any attempts to force us or our neighbors to suffer alone or to fear invisibility. Abram with all his men and war bounty still could not be reassured about his legacy. His men below him and all his wealth were no solace to him.

One of the most striking visible features of my home, is the giant redwood trees that tower hundreds of feet into the foggy North Coast sky. The redwood is the tallest living thing on earth, but what few people understand is that they compared to other trees they have shallow roots. Now how can it be that trees that are almost 400 feet tall can stay standing with shallow roots? The secret is that they spread their roots widely and intertwine with those of other trees. The entire redwood ecosystem lives and dies together. The simplest ground cover, ferns, oxalis and trillium all depend on the shade and moisture of the trees. And the trees need the ground cover to prevent erosion and compression on their roots.

How might we become more like the mighty redwoods?

As individuals we must strive to stay connected, to our family, to our friends and to our community. We must acknowledge the social forces that keep us from bonding with people who might seem different from us and take concerted action to break down artificial barriers created between us all. We must let no one suffer in silent isolation, and rescue all from their literal and metaphorical solitary confinement. We must be like the roots of the redwoods, or the tubes that bring us food, and air and circulate our blood when we are on life support. Like the sponsor one has in 12 step, or the neighborhood elder who reassures anxious new parents. We all have a friend that we haven’t heard from in a while or someone down the street that we have not met yet. And all of us have had a time when an unexpected call or visit would have made a world of difference. Each of us must be for each of our friends, neighbors and others a support. This will take great courage but it is courage that we can muster.

As a community we must work together to include all our neighbors as their full authentic selves in our society. We must call on our creativity to build opportunities throughout society for meaningful participation and for everyone to find support in each of lives challenges. We must support the institutions and events that break down social divides in our communities. Where I live, the only institutions that unite people across race and class are public schools and youth soccer. This can be as simple as sharing a meal with others each week, or volunteering in our community. Or even keeping events accessible by transit or offering childcare. One young friend leads a much appreciated book discussion group at a local senior center. We must have a very deliberate compassion and a thirst for justice to ensure that the less privileged among us can participate fully and equally in the blessings of life and our moral commonwealth.

As religious people gathered in beloved community, we must spiritually and materially build a generosity of spirit and a surplus of caring and compassion that washes over our community and out into the world that so badly needs our love and our benevolent rage. We must reclaim our Universalist heritage and leave no souls behind. UU Minister Peter Morales from Golden, CO makes the case that we have a moral obligation to find and welcome the spiritually homeless people with no one to confide in, and that it is morally equivalent to not feeding the hungry or housing the homeless to turn away, by insularity or the inertia of our comfort zone, these desperate seekers of solace.

When Martin Luther King said that the arc of the moral universe is vast but it curves towards justice, he was inspired by the white abolitionist Unitarian Theodore Parker. And even if it indeed curves towards justice, and all things shall pass, and things will work out in the end, sometimes it needs a little hand from us, individually and collectively. Just like sometimes we all need a little hand.

Whatever God you do or don’t believe in, we are the divine hands to bind up the broken and set the captives free. It is only our ears that can be the thousand ears of Kuan Yin Bodhisattva who hears the world’s cries and our hands the thousand hands that rescue and heal.

There will never be a utopia where all our problems are solved. But let us covenant together to be that life support, those life giving roots and trunks that keep all of us and all our hopes alive. Let us solemnly swear to be constant reminders and steadfast support to all our friends and neighbors to feel, as Jesse Jackson put it so eloquently many years ago:

“Wherever you are tonight, you can make it. Hold your head high; stick your chest out. You can make it. It gets dark sometimes, but the morning comes. Don't you surrender! Keep Hope Alive!”

Let a bond bind us to all creation, and truly leave no soul behind. And though we will split no animals in half and walk between them, and won’t receive any great vision of the stars , let us pray for the strength to reassure one another, and each soul that struggles, that as numerous as the stars, we are here, loving and caring to see one another through the long cold night.

And just maybe, then, we will be able to sleep through the night, or know right away whose shoulder we can cry on. Or how to talk to our AA sponsor when the battery in our phone is dead. Or who can help when the landlord needs the rent and the baby needs medicine. Or even what to do when things are going all right but you can’t figure out why you feel so alone.

And if our commitment to justice and to one another is to be more than hollow words, than we have some work to do. Hard work, scary work even, but rich generative work, like getting are hands dirty tilling soil to make the spiritual vacant lots of American life into gardens of flowers for beauty and food for sustenance.

Kedves testvéreim, my dear sweet siblings, Amen.

Comfort the afflicted? Afflict the comfortable?

2007-03-06T11:27:00.000-08:00

When I think pastorally, I feel some sympathy for the concerns people have about UU church life being too much about politics.

But other times, I ask myself, what is the proper response of a faith community or a denomination at a time when our country is practicing torture, extraordinary rendition and what would be considered war crimes if performed by any other government on earth?

I'll admit that I am a pretty serious activist and don't need to hear about these issues from my church. And I'll admit that I've had enough going on in my life that I need pastoral care as much as anyone. And my sermon didn't mention any of these political issues this last Sunday.

But what is the purpose of our religious life together? To feel better? To keep us entertained? To feel smarter than people who go to "regular" churches?

How can our worship together serve its prophetic function without everyone complaining about politics? I've come to believe that anything that involves people and power is politics and there is no way around it. I'd rather plead guilty to being political in church than forget that silence is the voice of complicity and that the prophetic voice is just as important as the pastoral.

Happy Birthday to You,,,

2007-01-15T19:17:00.000-08:00

Excerpt from the Letter from A Birmingham Jail:

I must make two honest confessions to you, my Christian and Jewish brothers. First, I must confess that over the past few years I have been gravely disappointed with the white moderate. I have almost reached the regrettable conclusion that the Negro's great stumbling block in his stride toward freedom is not the White Citizen's Councilor or the Ku Klux Klanner, but the white moderate, who is more devoted to "order" than to justice; who prefers a negative peace which is the absence of tension to a positive peace which is the presence of justice; who constantly says: "I agree with you in the goal you seek, but I cannot agree with your methods of direct action"; who paternalistically believes he can set the timetable for another man's freedom; who lives by a mythical concept of time and who constantly advises the Negro to wait for a "more convenient season." Shallow understanding from people of good will is more frustrating than absolute misunderstanding from people of ill will. Lukewarm acceptance is much more bewildering than outright rejection.

I had hoped that the white moderate would understand that law and order exist for the purpose of establishing justice and that when they fan in this purpose they become the dangerously structured dams that block the flow of social progress. I had hoped that the white moderate would understand that the present tension in the South is a necessary phase of the transition from an obnoxious negative peace, in which the Negro passively accepted his unjust plight, to a substantive and positive peace, in which all men will respect the dignity and worth of human personality. Actually, we who engage in nonviolent direct action are not the creators of tension. We merely bring to the surface the hidden tension that is already alive. We bring it out in the open, where it can be seen and dealt with. Like a boil that can never be cured so long as it is covered up but must be opened with an its ugliness to the natural medicines of air and light, injustice must be exposed, with all the tension its exposure creates, to the light of human conscience and the air of national opinion before it can be cured.

In your statement you assert that our actions, even though peaceful, must be condemned because they precipitate violence. But is this a logical assertion? Isn't this like condemning a robbed man because his possession of money precipitated the evil act of robbery? Isn't this like condemning Socrates because his unswerving commitment to truth and his philosophical inquiries precipitated the act by the misguided populace in which they made him drink hemlock? Isn't this like condemning Jesus because his unique God-consciousness and never-ceasing devotion to God's will precipitated the evil act of crucifixion? We must come to see that, as the federal courts have consistently affirmed, it is wrong to urge an individual to cease his efforts to gain his basic constitutional rights because the quest may precipitate violence. Society must protect the robbed and punish the robber.

I had also hoped that the white moderate would reject the myth concerning time in relation to the struggle for freedom. I have just received a letter from a white brother in Texas. He writes: "An Christians know that the colored people will receive equal rights eventually, but it is possible that you are in too great a religious hurry. It has taken Christianity almost two thousand years to accomplish what it has. The teachings of Christ take time to come to earth." Such an attitude stems from a tragic misconception of time, from the strangely rational notion that there is something in the very flow of time that will inevitably cure all ills. Actually, time itself is neutral; it can be used either destructively or constructively. More and more I feel that the people of ill will have used time much more effectively than have the people of good will. We will have to repent in this generation not merely for the hateful words and actions of the bad people but for the appalling silence of the good people. Human progress never rolls in on wheels of inevitability; it comes through the tireless efforts of men willing to be co-workers with God, and without this 'hard work, time itself becomes an ally of the forces of social stagnation. We must use time creatively, in the knowledge that the time is always ripe to do right. Now is the time to make real the promise of democracy and transform our pending national elegy into a creative psalm of brotherhood. Now is the time to lift our national policy from the quicksand of racial injustice to 6e solid rock of human dignity.

Mikulas Bacsi comes to town

2006-12-18T05:57:00.000-08:00

After years of being strictly agnostic on the Santa question (we would
feign ignorance but the grandparents could do whatever they want), our
family is in Transylvania this holiday season.

Here, on December 6th children clean their boots and leave them
outside and Mikulas Bacsi (Uncle Nicholas) comes and leaves goodies
and gifts. As the visiting Americans, every effort was made to make
sure an adequate Mikulas Bacsi would come to our house. It is Saint
Nicholas day and the tradition lives on in the Unitarian villages
(which were Catholic a few centuries ago) even if the Catholic saint
becomes Uncle Mikulas.

Our little ones were quite excited. I got the phone call from the
minister to get ready and made the bag exchange to get the gifts to
them before the kids came out to see Mikulas Bacsi.

It was quite adorable and charming. Chocolate is quite the major gift
here and we have had to take a real "don't ask, don't tell, don't
pursue" approach to our kids getting sugar and milk products.

Christmas will be 4 days here. We will have regular church and
communion on Sunday monring, Christmas Eve service on Sunday evening,
and then worship on the 25th, 26th and 27th. Children will perform at
the school on the Friday before and at the Church on Christmas eve
(Religious Education is taught by the minister at the local public
school here). We are quite looking forward to it.

After that, we return to the states after 6 months and celebrate the
holidays with family and friends.

Transylvanian Unitarian Liturgy

2006-12-18T03:35:00.000-08:00

Transylvanian Unitarian Liturgy

One of my initial goals for my work in Transylvania was to learn about Transylvanian Unitarian liturgy. Practically, of course, it is very important to know what to do when. The Transylvanian church now has a standard order of service. In the recent past, each congregation had its own standard order of service. Of course before the service even starts there are certain rituals to be observed.
First there are the bells. In our village, the bells ring three times before the service, first at 10am, then 10:30 and finally at 11:00. I try to head to church at the first bell, though most ministers actually live in a parish house and don’t leave their house until the third bell. When I am not in the pulpit on any given Sunday I really enjoy leaving closer to the third bell, when I can see the people of the village walking to church.
Because our village is almost entirely Unitarian it is very pleasant to walk the length of the village with all of the people who will attend church. On Sunday (and on most other days) the typical greeting is “Isten áldj,” or “God bless you.” This is a standard parting and greeting among Unitarians no matter how devout. Once when I was walking down the street I saw an older woman looking out her window. I could have said “Csokolom” or “Jo napot kivanok” (“I kiss your hand” or “Good Day”) but instead I said ““Isten áldj.” Her immediate reaction was “Nem, katolikus.” I apparently had found the only Catholic in the village, so I apologized and went on my way.
At the minister’s house we have coffee and discuss the bible text and sermon theme for the day. If I am in the pulpit we also discuss any words that might be difficult to translate. Once at a special service in another village I was there for a loaf of bread to be cut into pieces for communion. The chalice and special linens also needed to be prepared for this. I watched the minister’s wife work with the silver and linen and the minister’s son help keep track of how many pieces of bread had been cut. On a normal occasion things are a little more relaxed. Often the minister will socialize with the lay leadership or the elders of the church, as well.
When the third bell strikes, the parish house is locked and we head to the office for the donning of a preaching robe. Transylvanian robes have no sleeves. The robe rests on your shoulders and you take a string under each arm and tie them in a bow behind your back. Some robes also have a clasp in the front near the neck. After the preacher is wearing a robe, we leave the office and lock the door. Whoever is in the pulpit that day leads the way. Often we stop and wait for people to arrive or make their way into the church. Usually while the third bell is still ringing we wait for people to enter ahead of us as we walk down the path to the church door. Even in the city I have seen the minister wait on the sidewalk outside while latecomers enter the church.
When the minister enters, the members of the congregation stand up. Whoever is in the pulpit that Sunday enters first and opens the door to the minister’s pew. Whichever one of us is not in the pulpit then enters the minister’s pew. Both of us stand along with the congregation for the opening hymn. At the conclusion of the first hymn, the minister leads the congregation in sitting down, usually by laying hands on the closed hymnal or bible before taking a seat in the minister’s pew.
The minister and the congregation all sit and sing the second hymn. At the conclusion of the second hymn, the minister goes upstairs to the pulpit. The congregation stands when the minister gets to the pulpit.
The minister starts with a prayer for the congregation. It usually lasts 3-5 minutes and is intended to reflect the concerns of the congregation that week. It is important to note that prayers and sermons are not typically read in Transylvania. The prayer is intended to be extemporaneous and unique to that time and congregation. The minister’s prayer is followed by the Lord’s Prayer (Matthew 6:9-13 or “Our father who art in heaven, hallowed be thy name. Thy will be done, thy kingdom come on earth as it is in heaven. Give us this our daily bread. Forgive us in our debts as we forgive our debtors. Deliver us not into times of trial but rescue us from the evil one. Amen) In some congregations the members recite the Lord’s Prayer with the minister, though I have mostly seen just the minister speaking both prayers. Both prayers are closed with an Amen.
The Lord’s Prayer is followed by the middle hymn. The congregation remains standing through both prayers, the middle hymn and the reading of the bible text. The text from the bible is identified and read allowed. The minister closes the reading with an Amen, closes the bible, lays hands on the bible, and with a nod the congregation sits down for the sermon.
Sermons are normally about 20 minutes long, just as in the United States. Liturgically, they are quite different, as the ministers use no printed text and preach from a pulpit above the heads of the congregation. The pulpits are typically ornate woodwork and are decorated with fine Transylvanian lace. (A family member’s initial reaction to a picture of me in the pulpit was, “I thought Unitarian church services were usually very simple?”) Ministers preach in a loud resounding voice. It would be easy to mistake their preaching for some sort of fire and brimstone moralizing because of their energy. The acoustics are amazing. It is a powerful feeling even when I do not understand the language being spoken. I have only seen one church (one of the largest in the old Transylvanian capital of Kolozsvar) that felt the need for amplification.
The sermon is followed by a silent prayer. The short silent prayer is relatively new to Transylvanian liturgy and it has received varying enthusiasm in different churches. The silent prayer is followed by a benediction.
The benediction is much like that in North America. I always try to ask God to help us live out that week’s teaching to better love god and serve our neighbors. In most congregations, ministers hold out the palms of their hands as they ask God to bless the life of the congregation. There is some controversy around this in places, because it should be clear that any blessings come from God and not from the minister. At the end of the benediction, the minister leaves the pulpit and returns to the minister’s pew. While standing at the Lord’s Table (where communion is given and baptisms performed) the minister makes announcements to the congregation. Typically as a visitor, I am introduced to the congregation during this time and the congregation is invited to ask any questions. After this period of announcements, and occasional discussions of church business (particularly during the summer when meetings are less frequent) the closing hymn is played.
At this, the minister goes out the door of the church. Whoever was in the pulpit is first to leave the building and stands immediately outside the door. The minister’s family then follows, leaving first from the front pew. After this, the members of the congregation file past the minister (and family) shaking hands and sharing a thank you or blessing as they look into each other’s eyes. Along the path of the church, the members of the church form a receiving line and greet each other. In the city, people crowd onto the sidewalk just outside the church and along the front of the church building (the better part of a block in Kolozsvar). Typically the minister offers a few words to this outside gathering and then a farewell. At this, we go through the church gate and to the office at the parish house. This is when the preaching robe is removed, and the treasurer counts the offering. A receipt is made and a record made in the church register of attendance, money received, the bible text and sermon theme of each week. At this point there is often socializing with the lay leadership of the church or some of the members. In our village a choir practice sometimes happens at this time.

Transylvanian Opening Prayer

2006-12-17T03:36:00.000-08:00

One of the first questions I had after attending church regularly in Transylvania and starting to preach in Transylvanian churches was about the structure of the prayer. The opening prayer is at least five minutes long and a significant part of the overall service.
I found out that there is a model structure for each Sunday’s prayer that is followed by ministers here:

Megszolitas- invocation
Dicsoites- glorification
Halaadas- thanksgiving
Bunbanat- penetance
Kérés- request
Befejezés- End

In the weeks leading up to the American Thanksgiving holiday, I preached a sermon on Francis David to commemorate his death anniversary (November 15th). Often when I am in the pulpit here, I have the local minister give the prayer and benediction because they are intended to reflect local issues specific to the congregation. For this particular service I chose to offer a prayer of my own attempting to follow the structure used by ministers here:

We give thanks for life and all its blessings. And today especially we give thanks for great teachers we have received including your greatest teacher Jesus and our great Unitarian teacher Francis David. We are full of gratitude for the teachings we have received and our ability to learn and make the most of our reason. We are grateful for Francis David who started this church, and for all those known and unknown who have struggled with your help guided by your great teachers to keep this faith alive and free.

Sadly we must acknowledge that sometimes we do not live up to our teaching. We allow ourselves to be divided against our beloved brothers and sisters because of old slights or petty differences. We must repent of the selfish ways of the world and set ourselves back on the right course to love our neighbors as ourselves and better serve that force that gives life to all. We must love all life with the love of that which created all. We must avert our eyes from all the distractions that life has to offer us and stay focused on our true divine purpose.

Jó istenunk look over all our brothers and sisters. Keep us on the right path and keep us from harm. May all who are cold have heat, may all who hunger have food. Let peace prevail on earth, especially as we enter this holiday season. Fill our hearts with your peace, today and everyday. Help us love one another and learn better from the great teachers you have offered us.

Isten lélek, fill our hearts during this time of worship as in all times. Help us appreciate all that is holy and right. Let our eyes be your eyes and our hands your hands to serve you as we become servants of your loving spirit. Amen.

Review: Transylvanian Order of Service

2006-12-17T03:28:00.000-08:00

Transylvanian Order of Service: A Review

1. First Hymn
2. Hymn
3. Prayer
4. Lords prayer (Our Father)
5. Middle Hymn
6. Bible Text
7. Sermon
8. Silent mediation (Introduced by John 4:24)
9. Closing Prayer
10. Announcements
11. Benediction

Reflections on the sense of place and its power

2006-10-13T00:39:00.000-07:00

There is power in the knowledge of a place. The French have created a new word for this “terroir” which combines the word for land with the word for knowledge and ability. While I may have guessed at the reality of this, I don’t think I truly understood it until I came here to the Homorod Valley of Transylvania.
One could walk the length of both the big and little Homorod Valleys in a couple long days. The distance between villages is very small. But in each village, you will find slightly different ways of life and slightly different ways of working the land and raising animals.
This is not from some sense of novelty or innovation. Nor is it the result of radically different geography. One village may have access to more wood and trees while another may have easier access to stones. But in general, the villages of both valleys are basically similar in geology and climate.
The residents of each village have built up over generations an intimate knowledge of their microclimate and locale. Each tiny difference is probably unnoticeable to the outsider. Whether it be small variations in how hay is stacked, when or where difference crops are planted, or how animals are kept and pastured. It is even reflected in the contemporary use of cement, tractors and combines. One can see slight but systematic variations in the selection of construction materials and tractor attachments.
On my very first day in Transylvania I was asked about why I had come here and what I would do when I returned to America. One older man suggested that I could tell everyone how bad it was here. I must say that I have not seen anything so bad in my time here.
In planning to travel to Transylvania, I prepared my self for the worst possible conditions. I did not know what my house would be like. I did not how I would eat. I did not know if people would be hungry or dirty or begging in the streets.
In the villages I have seen nothing like this. People are poorer here than in America. But rural poverty here is similar to rural poverty at home. Houses are heated, food is cooked and water is warmed by burning wood. Most houses have electricity and most houses I have visited have a washing machine for laundry. While many things are stored in cellars for winter, every house I have visited has a refrigerator.
People here are very concerned about my well-being. They always want to know how I am doing here and if I am able to eat. My strict vegetarian diet is a mystery to most people, but everyone wants to be sure that I am eating well. The strange thing is that vegetarian soup broth and some soy products are cheaper and more readily available in even small markets here than at the Safeway in my hometown.
In my hometown there was recently a small conference on economic localization which had participants from 7 states and several countries. The point of this conference was to look at how local economies could survive based on sustainable agricultural and supplies available within a 100 mile radius. The thinking behind this is that there will eventual be a collapse of the economy based on cheap oil as oil becomes less and less available in the world. I try to tell the farmers of the Homorod Valley that what they have practiced for hundreds of years, people I know are paying to learn. And it all comes down to an intimate knowledge of a place and its particularities.
Now I can talk at length about the problems of provincialism and the fatalism that it can create. I have seen it myself teaching both the economically isolated urban poor and the geographically isolated rural poor. But I also know with a religious faith that the treasure of human diversity and the keys to human survival were born in the intimate knowledge of and deep rooted connection to place.
My home in California is in the great redwood trees. They are the tallest living things on earth. They grow almost 100 meters tall. But the paradox is that they have shallow roots. Rather than sinking roots deeper and deeper into the earth to support their massive weight, their roots spread laterally, where they intertwine with the roots of other trees. Their very survival depends on the survival of the other trees, and on that of the other plants, like fern, sorrel, and wild iris, that have adapted to their particular ecosystem. Their survival depends on the health of their community and place. And it is thus with humans as well. Our survival depends on our community and environment. And for this knowledge I owe a great debt of gratitude to the people of the Homorod Valley, where I live days shaped by the daily trip of the cows to the pasture and back. Where even the smallest details of life are shaped by mysteries of working the land and preparing for winter in ways I am only beginning to understand.
I think some Unitarian Universalists probably suppose that we in North America have a lot to teach other religions, even our brothers and sisters in Transylvania about earth based spirituality. But the truth is, that people like me (and most modern UUs) who are generations removed from living off the land, may have a millennium of learning to catch up on. For we are small and the earth is big. And we can only live in one place at a time. And similarly, we can only observe the rhythm of life and its cycles in one place at one time. And the lives of our brothers and sisters in the Homorod Valley are holy volumes of this knowledge, that even if we were to cross divides of language and distance, we would still face a great difficulty in truly comprehending. It is my fervent hope that in my time here I can develop even the smallest understanding of what it means to live according to and in the creation of this knowledge.

Where have all the partners gone?

2006-10-12T07:31:00.000-07:00

It's been a long time since I have posted anything. My connectivity is problematic here in the village.

I recently got to visit with some North Americans visiting and doing some volunteer work at the partner church here in Transylvania.

One thing that I am hearing too often is about congregations who may have not heard from their American partner churches in a long while. Maybe the partner church work was the turf of some eccentric who has since left or maybe it was a pet project of a previous minister.

I would ask any UU readers who are not sure if their church has a partner church to check the list of partners and see if your church may have a dormant partnership. Also there are churches in India and the Philippines looking for partners.

During the summer I saw lots of people visiting their partner churches and have seen some of the projects made possible by partner churches. But really I hear that people want to know that you know they exist and are still here living their lives and living out their faith and traditions. Transylvania is not the Unitarian version of the Amish country or Colonial Williamsburg. There are real people here living real lives. Most people living in villages never travel outside of the local area and it means a lot to hear from people around the world.

So please, check and see if your congregation has a current partnership. And if it does, see if you can make sure there is communication more than once or twice a year. Send pictures of your people and your church. See if you can find out how many kids are in confirmation this year or how many baptisms there have been. Try to share information about the highlights of your church year and get information about the major Transylvanian events (especially Easter, Pentecost, Thanksgiving and Christmas). It will matter to someone here more than you might think.

Confirmation Sunday

2006-07-14T09:26:00.000-07:00

Been very busy or offline most of the last couple weeks. Two weeks ago I attended confirmation Sunday services at the First Unitarian Church of Kolozsvar.

I got to share a very different liturgical experience yesterday. It was confirmation Sunday at the Unitarian Church of Koloszvar. At first this was the source of some confusion for me because the church was packed with a few hundred people. I heard the bell (which is only a couple hundred feet out my window, and thought it might be too late.

I walked down several flights of stairs. (We are staying in the dorms which are in the attic of the Unitarian high school. The headquarters for the Unitarian Church of Transylvania is in the same building and the church is right next door). I made it to the street just in time to see the minister and the bishop in their robes walking in with the kids who were going to be confirmed. In the foyer there was a large stone that commemorated David Ferenc (Francis David) proclaiming the Diet of Torda.

I walked in the big outer door (which I will admit I was a little afraid to open when I passed it each day on my way to Hungarian class).

A woman tried to explain to me that it was a “templom unitariaus.” I told her “Es unitarius amerikai vajyok” which is bad grammar but I think she got my point. Another woman who seemed to be in a position of authority came out to the foyer where we were standing and said “Tessek” which could mean either “What do you want?” or “That’s it.” She meant the latter as she closed a curtain in front of the door behind us and went through the inner door and back to her pew. She invited the older woman to a seat and helped a couple other latecomers find room around the side of the sanctuary.

I stood for most of the regular service. I managed to get a seat after the regular service had ended and the confirmation ceremony was well under way

I have been thinking a lot lately about what Unitarian Universalism could learn from the confirmation practices of the Unitarian Church of Transylvania. On the one hand, it is easy to see it as just like the confirmation services we might see at Catholic or mainline Protestant churches in the US. In a packed church in Kolozsvar, I got to see a multigenerational service, where grandparents and little sisters and big brothers clearly were remembering their own confirmation or looking forward to their own chance to march in with the minister and take communion in front of the whole community. It is this idea of a multigenerational, family faith that I think would be a true revolution in Unitarian Universalism, at least as I see it on the west coast of the United States.

Almost there

2006-06-24T03:46:00.000-07:00

We are most of the way to Transylvania now. I had to leave so many things behind I sort of panic at the thought of what we are going to need. What might I need to function as an intern and live for six months? I shaved off about half the books I wanted though I am sure I will be begging people to ship other theology books to me. I've now lugged my massive Oxford Study Bible from plane to plane through security checkpoints. I had to take it out on one flight so my bag would fit in the overhead bin.

I'm at a T-Mobile hotspot in a crazy duty free shopping mall at London Heathrow. I feel incapable of even basic grammatical language. Its 11am and my body still thinks it might be 4am like it is in California.

Had a near panic yesterday as our Budapest lodging fell through but we found a nice apartment to stay at through expatriates.com. UU's traveling through Budapest on Partner Church activities or to the ICUU symposium contact me and I can give you the contact for it.

Tonight we sleep in Budapest. In the morning we will take the optimustrans.ro minibus to Kolozsvar. We wanted to take the train but the schedule did not work out and the bus service came highly recommended.

Fathers' Day Sermon

2006-05-29T11:29:00.000-07:00

I was asked to give a Fathers' Day Sermon this year. In reality it would easy to tell a couple funny stories about my dad and a couple sad ones about his death and be done with it.

I work pretty hard with my congregation to talk about the Jewish and Christian traditions and how they can inform Unitarian Universalism. I usually try to bring in at least some of the Revised Common Lectionary readings when I am in the pulpit to help folks be at least familiar with what the other protestant churches in town might be talking about.

But I have to admit, with Fathers' Day I am stumped. I think of Jephthah's daughter, Abraham with the binding of Isaac and of course the father who loved the world so much he gave his only son. I mean I love you all, but nobody is taking my boys.

I feel like I can talk reasonably intelligently about Christology, but when push comes to shove, I can't quite get past that.

I don't really want to be cheesy enough to refer to the Da Vinci code, but how is it more troubling that Jesus could be a father (all the holes in that theory aside) than the notion that a loving or just God would sacrifice his son?

Iron Chef Daddy: Let the battle begin

2006-05-21T18:49:00.000-07:00

I've been greatly enjoying the Iron Chef Daddy action over at Returning. All I can say is Allez cuisine!

Transylvania

2006-05-14T20:41:00.000-07:00

I've been very bad about writing anything here. I've been hit by a very busy school year end and a very busy couple months at work.

On top of this, I have been given the once in a lifetime opportunity to go to Transylvania and spend six months working with a rural minister and participating in the life of his congregation. This parish immersion experience will be my first ministerial internship, though I will be applying for another internship in the US later.

During the week of General Assembly, I will be in an intensive Hungarian language seminar in Kolozsvar. I will then attend the ICUU symposium before I travel to the village of Homorodszentpal.

I believe that there is a lot we can learn from the lives of our brothers and sisters in Transylvania. I am particularly interested in how different liturgies develop in different cultural contexts and in how differently the same Unitarian ideals develop in different contexts. It is my hope that a broader awareness of Transylvanian Unitarianism can help many Unitarian Universalists come to terms with their relationship to their Christian roots such that they might be able to derive some meaning from the Christian tradition without necessarily identifying as Christian or forgetting whatever troubling experiences they may have had with the tradition.

Anyone interested in furthering the work of bringing Transylvanian ministers to study in the US or in how more American UU seminarians could have learning experiences in Transylvania should contact the Balazs Scholars Program at Starr King School For the Ministry.

Thoreau

2006-05-09T19:36:00.000-07:00

So we saunter toward the Holy Land, till one day the sun shall shine more brightly than ever he has done, shall perchance shine into our minds and hearts, and light up our whole lives with a great awakening light, as warm and serene and golden as on a bankside in autumn.

LIberal Religion vs. LIberal Politics?

2006-05-03T19:25:00.000-07:00

I appreciate the tone of this post on immigration issues, though I think it raises a key question for me.

There is a line between liberal religion and liberal politics. The post from the UU Congregation of Central Nassau makes a lot of references to the meaning of citizenship and the rights of states. To what extent are states and citizenship the domain of religion or theology? I'll admit that for me the rights of individuals and even their groups may seem grounded in theology but I am not really ready to make the leap to states. I think there is a real reason that the Christian tradition teaches us to render unto Caesar that which is Caesar's and render unto God that which is God's.

I understand how in theory a state may just be an extension of a community of individuals, but in practice I never see states truly functioning this way. When is the religious legitimation of the state or the rights of state actors not idolatry?

I mean this more as a question than as heated rhetoric. My initial answer would be that states are only legitimate from the point of view of theology when they (and to the extent that they are) furthering the blossoming of life in its fullness and helping beings develop (in Channing's terms) their faculties of the soul.

My view is perhaps overly influenced by Foucault's notion that power only really exists in its exercise and therefore the practice of the state is more important than the theory of the state.

Is the belief that liberal states represent agencies of human progress a conflation of liberal politics and liberal religion? I'd very much like to hear someone's argument on grounds that for liberal religion to be embodied it must function in the realm of the possible, with a full understanding of the eschatological reservation, though this is a compromise I am not sure I am ready to make.

May 1st: Our generation's civil rights movement?

2006-05-02T12:01:00.000-07:00

Could I be the only white UU blogger who made it to a protest yesterday? Could this be? I'll admit I went on my lunch hour and found the time and place by reading a Spanish language newspaper.

I spent the last weekend at the Pacific Central District Assembly. For the Sunday worship service, Rev. Dr. Rebecca Parker was in the pulpit talking about UU Theology. She made the case that there are some theological options that are off the table for Unitarian Universalists, including views of predestination or other denials of at least partial human agency. She argued that the notion that some people would be eternally rewarded while others would be separated and eternally punished is also not compatible with Unitarian Universalism.

She also made the point (and very nicely quoted me) that there is no way for a Unitarian Universalist theology to consider any human beings illegal.

I know I am something of a panentheist, though I tend to use a humanist vocabulary. There is a spark in all people that I would call divine. And it makes us part of a larger whole. If anything is to be saved, it will be in these bodies, by these people in this world. If there is a balm in Gilead, it will be applied by our hands, and if a promised land that can be is to be built it will be built by these very same hands.

May no borders separate us or denigrate the sanctity of working hands. These hands are all we have to do the work of God and the work of humanity.

Solidarity and conversion

2006-04-19T19:14:00.000-07:00

The desire to diagnose injustice as an intellectual problem as well as the power of action to achieve a new form of justice requires “raised affections,” a vitality taht can break through old forms of behavior and create new patterns of community. But the raising of the affections is a much harder thing to accomplish than even the education of the mind; it is especially difficult among those who think they have found security.
This element of commitment, of change of heart, of decision, so much emphasized in the Gospels, has been neglected by religious liberalism, and that is the prime source of its enfeeblement. We liberals are largely an uncommitted and therefore a self-frustrating people. Our first task, then is to restore to liberalism its own dynamic and its own prophetic genius. We need conversion within ourselves. Only by some such revolution can we be seized by a prophetic power that will enable us to proclaim both the judgment and the love of God. Only by some such conversion can we be possessed by a love that will not let us go.

James Luther Adams’ notion that liberalism and liberals need a conversion experience strikes me as an amazing truth. I struggled with this concept for many years but lacked the language to talk about it. During my radical youth, I have sometimes chided well meaning liberals who had very abstract ideas of justice and very lukewarm commitment to their justice work.
Sometimes I will tell dogmatic atheist activists (UU and other) that if they are really just doing work for others they really are just performing that kind of “Christian charity” that they despise. I have found that no one stays committed for an extended period of time if they understand their work as doing good deeds for others. Usually, their notion of the other is so abstract and so distant that the work loses meaning and dissipates into the problem of “compassion fatigue.”
Other times, when I have really looked at issues of commitment and what it can take to create change and build justice and community, I have talked to people about two kinds of consciousness. The difference between the liberal and the radical can often be delineated by these two kinds of consciousness.
One I call the No consciousness. Liberals with this state of mind will take the radical step of dissent, but will seldom reach beyond their individual comfort zone in terms of risk or in terms of dialogue with others outside their immediate social circle. The quiet check and letter writers (God bless them) are usually in this mode. Often times, those who participate in silent vigils or other entirely symbolic actions also operate from the point of view of the No consciousness. They have taken the very brave (necessary yet not sufficient) step of registering their dissent, but have yet to learn Frederick Douglass’ wise words, “Without struggle there is no progress.”
The other consciousness I refer to as the Hell No consciousness. Where the point of view of the No consciousness might say “I disapprove of this,” from the Hell No consciousness one might say “I disapprove of this and I am obliged to do what I can to prevent this from being done in my name or to reinforce my own unearned privilege.” In this light, silence is indeed the voice of complicity. While a kind of mindless rebelliousness can sometimes look like this Hell No consciousness, when it is sincere it reflects positive progressive towards a broader notion of self that is involved and engaged in the larger community and world. It moves beyond the brave dissent of the mind and into action and the dissent of the body and community.

The Fire Next Time

2006-04-11T22:04:00.000-07:00

This is the crime of which I accuse my countrymen, and for which I and history will never forgive them, that they have destroyed and are destroying hundreds of thousands of lives, and do not know it, and do not want to know it.

James Baldwin in The Fire Next Time as quoted by Rebecca Parker in Soul Work.