40-tude

Cats should be seen online and nowhere else!

2008-10-28T14:13:00.000-04:00

more animals

Stuff I want to enhance my life...Part 2

2008-10-21T11:00:00.001-04:00

I realized I never actually completed my SIWEML list. I got so focused on setting the standard for measuring, I never got beyond the Landrollers. So back to the list!

2. New cell phone - For the longest time I've been whining about how I miss my smartphone, my Palm Treo. But in my quest to purge unnecessary/frivolous items/people from my life, I've realized a smartphone is not what I need. It certainly doesn't meet the SIWEML test, and I just don't want to be that efficient anymore. But what I do want is a CUTE phone! I want a phone that has colors and creatively placed buttons and has moveable parts. If I were an engineer, I would design a phone that looked like jewelry...the earpiece would be an earring or ear charm, the microphone would be embedded in a necklace. You could have a bracelet as a key pad. In my world, all this looks very chic and well-functioning. Watch, someone will build it.

3. Rolling briefcase - I don't travel much for my job, but when I do, I want to look like I know what I'm doing. So now I want a briefcase that has an extended handle and rolls. Hmmm. This may be edited later and filed under Stuff I Buy and Never Use. Note to self: rethink the Landrollers too.

Three reasons I'm in a good mood today

2008-10-21T10:46:00.001-04:00

1. My checkbook is balanced.

2. There are no bedsheet marks on my freshly painted fingernails.

All my work files are in alphabetical order. All the ones I care about anyway.

About me

2008-08-12T13:00:00.000-04:00

The easiest way to begin explaining myself is to consider the roles I play in the lives of the people around me. So I've listed the roles, along with a description of how I see myself in those roles. All these roles I play provide inspiration for my blog topics!

Mother	Single parent
Daughter	Caregiver
Professional	Staff-level in higher education
Graduate student	Ph.D.; not ABD!
Consultant	Entrepreneur, Organization Development
Friend/Peer	Recently moved; feebly trying to maintain relationships and make new ones
Family member	Cousin, Niece, Aunty
Renter	Considering condo ownership
Wanna-be	5K Runner, camper, swimmer, singer
SINGLE!!	SINGLE!!

Stuff I Want to Enhance My Life

2008-07-31T10:01:00.007-04:00

Along with my goals for the upcoming year, I also keep track of "the stuff" I want/buy. I do this as a way of making sure "the stuff" is essential; I have been known to buy things I don't need, want or even like. The items on this list have to pass my litmus test. If it isn't career advancing, money enhancing, spiritually enlightening, esteem inviting, or nutritiously exciting than I probably don't need it.

Item #1 Landrollers - Cesar Millan, the male Latino version of Oprah to dogs and their owners, uses these when he skates with his pack. I "heart" him! Apparently word on the street is these skates are easier to use than inline skates, glide over uneven terrain better, and have better maneuverability. They cost more too. So how do they pass my SIWEML test? Here's why:

Career Advancing - No, my job does not involve skating, but it does require me to be healthy. I view any exercise as career advancing because if I'm too out of breath, tired or really ill, my career is one step closer to praying to the porcelain gods. I need to lose about 30 pounds of fat and gain about 10 to 15 lbs. of muscle. Skating will add variety to my exercise routines.

Money Enhancing - At practically $200 a pair, ummm, not real sure how the landrollers advance this goal. But, since I'm cutting back on other expenses over the next few weeks, it should even out. yeah, I'll go with that for now.

Spiritually Enlightening - If you've ever read Cesar's books, you'll already understand how this works. For those of you that haven't read or aren't dog lovers, this will be harder for you to comprehend, so maybe skip ahead. My puppy, Rockey Rockstar, has been the best thing that happened to me this year. He was on a list of "things I want before I'm 40". I never had an opportunity to have a dog until now. Spending time walking Rockey, watching him figure out his space in this world has been a sheer delight. Mother Nature is a powerful, beautiful thing. When I'm outdoors, I feel free from all man-made and self-made anxieties. I feel peaceful and happy. I think rollerblading together will be an experience Rockey and I both will enjoy.
Esteem Inviting - Esteem. I love that word. Too bad people don't use it anymore. I love the scene in Sense and Sensibility when Emma Thompson as Elinor Dashwood says of Edward Ferrars played by Hugh Grant, "I greatly esteem him." Some dictionary defines esteem as, to regard with respect, to have a high opinion of. How will Landrollers invite esteem in my life? I predict I will feel better about myself physically and emotionally as I bond with nature, my dog and myself. I will have quiet peaceful time to reflect on what and who matters most to me in my life.

Nutritiously Exciting - umm, nah. I'll stick with the esteem and career stuff I just mentioned.

So there it is. Maybe this is just a way to convince myself it's ok to spend $200 on a pair of roller skates. I wouldn't doubt it. A good friend of mine says she can talk herself in and out of all kinds of things when she puts her mind to it. So can I. Time will tell.

Days of the week, Part 1

2008-07-28T09:19:00.003-04:00

I have decided to rename the days of the week. I just can't bear to face one more Monday. Mondays suck, by nature they just suck. The sound of the word is dull, flat and monotone. You literally have to turn your mouth into an inverted U to pronounce the word...muhun-daye.

So what was once known as Monday, is now called Prepday. Prepday. Say it 3 times. What do you think? Non-emotive, simple, short and descriptive. What do you spend most of your time doing on a Monday? If you're like me, you spend a good deal of time planning the week, distributing information for future meetings, think about the next 4 days of the work week. You're preparing for the week, hence Prepday.

I thought about calling it Planday, Planningday, Setday, Beginday, and a few others not worth mentioning. But Prepday won. Again, with the simple and short. I also think Prepday is a neutral word to pronounce; I don't feel any particular feeling or sense when I purse my lips together to say "pruh-ep". And when I hear "Prepday" spoken by someone, I don't feel pressured or bored like I do when I hear "Monday".

So the day of the moon will now be officially (in my world) be forever known as Prepday. Any objections?

Teenagers: Humans or UFOs?

2008-05-05T11:20:00.006-04:00

My 14 year old HEARTS Shakespeare. Romeo and Juliet is her fav. Not for the romance, it's the language that appeals to her. I find this odd, considering this child has Amelia Bedelia beat by a longshot. When she was 5, she was doing something she wasn't supposed to. Her dad told her, "You do that one more time, hear?" Which we grown ups know means, DON'T do it again. Bless her sweet heart, she did it again. Why? Because he told her to.

She hates dirty dish water, especially if there's food in the sink. BUT she rarely scrapes her dishes...which is why there's food in the sink. Thankfully she brushes her teeth religiously (of course she has braces) BUT, she never puts the cap back on the toothpaste...probably because she's always brushing her teeth. She'll spend as much time and money as she can coiffing her hair, but showers...hmmm iffy. She burps like an overweight teamster. Her shedded hair prevents your feet from ever actually touching the floor. Her room smells like perfume and food and dirt and the closet looks like it has acid reflux, but the smile she gives me when she tells me she loves me makes up for all the teenage funk bombs a million times over!

Does this wallet make me look fat?

2008-03-10T22:40:00.003-04:00

Wholla peeps,

As I type, I'm looking at the skinniest wallet I ever did have. It's amazing what happens when you o-r-g-a-n-i-z-e. Why carry around all those store discount cards when one of your un-goals is to stop spending without a budget. Basically in my brain that means friends don't let friends spend without a plan. Don't need the cards if I'm not going to the store. So, right now, all I have in my wallet is my driver's license, insurance card, work ID, handy-dandy library card (proof this girl's on a budget AND she loves books), flex account card, debit card, medical & dental (got kids, must carry 24/7) cards, tip card, and gas card (Marc's gives 10 cents off per gallon at Speedway).

About the only additional thing I could purge would be the tip card. I used to wait tables, so somehow this means I MUST be accurate when tipping. Folks, I hope you all know to tip in hard cold CASH...neva eva charge a tip. It takes a few days for the charge/debit to run through, which means the service worker waits on the payment to come through. It seems ironic that the person I pay to do a job quickly has to wait to be paid for doing the job. So use cash...aren't we here to make life easier for each other?

So, what's in your wallet?

Ugly voices

2008-03-05T13:31:00.003-05:00

Rachael Ray - Calm down! It's just a meal!

Suze Orman - Smart as heck, but oh, the sound of nails on a chalkboard!

Dubya - do I hafta 'splain?

The sassy chick from 227...Jackee Harry

Charlie Brown - he sounds like he wants his ass kicked!

Victor from Young and the Restless - Is that an accent? Where's he from?

People I don't know who call me at home and don't identify themselves - I hate talking on the phone!

What's wrong with me?

2008-03-03T22:38:00.003-05:00

I'm gonna tag this entry, 'reasons why I'm going to hell' cuz nothing good can come from this. I don't know how or why these thoughts come to me, but they just do. Right outta nowhere. Like Merlin Mann's List of 5s. I'm not ready to commit to a numbered list like he does, cuz what happens if I have more or less? I'll feel too pressured..don't need that. K. So...

Why does Marlee Matlin have such big ears?
Why don't Hollywood stars have to have talent anymore? When did it become optional?
Is drooling a bad thing? I mean, is there a cure?
I really hate minivan drivers. I'm supposed to stop just cuz ur late? You all suck. So what you ran out of hamburger helper and junior is late to his playdate. Hang up and drive.
My ex-husband used to fix bikes. Does that mean I can get a job fixing bikes too?

And the award for best grown up female in the comedy/drama/thriller called, my life is...

2008-01-09T20:57:00.000-05:00

Me? (gasp) I won?

looks askance

Oh goodness, I can't believe it...you like me! You REALLY like me!

two offspring roll their eyes with disdain

I don't know what to say... I didn't expect to win! (blushing and fake-sweating)

offspring continue to share ocular displeasure

(gathers invisible full-length skirt) um, ok, I didn't prepare a speech, but I did scratch out some notes just in case someone else needed a speech...let's see where did I put it? (feigns checking invisible pockets in invisible skirt)

First and foremost...exactly what does foremost mean anyway? (giggle) I would like to give all glory, honor, praise, worship, gratitude and two small animal sacrifices to the one who made it all possible for me to win and the rest of you to lose.

youngest offspring's mouth falls open--oldest makes mad dash for ringing phone

I HEART Kathy Griffin!

My un-goals for '08

2008-01-09T10:24:00.000-05:00

In addition to getting rid of things I don't need, I also what to eliminate behaviors that are keeping me from achieving my goals for 08 (these will be posted later).

Un-goal 1) Shopping without a plan - I recently spent money on stuff for my kids (and myself...dayum) without first setting a budget. Why did I do this? I've since decided that I really enjoy starting new projects, but I don't get much of a rush following through. The rush of panic flowing through my entire body when I see an overdue bill must be addictive to me. Actually, I thought I was on the wagon, but I must have fallen off and didn't realize I was sittn on da curb. Well, enuf is enuf, said the fat man at the buffet. It's time to get back on that good ole budget wagon and hitch me up a star! (as long as it's on sale)

Un-goal 2) Drinking - Ok, I'm not proud to admit this, well maybe I am slightly, but I love wine. I could drink wine daily. And I have. To me, it makes my dinner taste so much better, my apartment look cleaner and my thighs look skinnier. Well maybe just one of them. And when I say I could drink wine daily, I'm not just talking about having one glass. Or two. I can pretty much finish a skinny bottle of chardonnay on my own. But I'm pretty sure that's not such a good idea. Besides the fact that it just doesn't fit into my grocery budget, it makes me sluggish and kinda cranky the next day. Since the holidays are over, I don't foresee a big occasion in the near future to celebrate...oh crap, scratch the winefest for MLK Day!

Un-goal 3) Wasting work days - I have been known (shhh) to take a day or several off from work because (pause) I'm sick, the kids are sick, a relative is ill or I just damn well feel like staying home! I recently changed roles at work, and now my job is so boring I want to pull my hair out! I absolutely adore my co-workers and my boss, but I am getting more and more dissatisfied with the work I have to do. Regardless, w.w. days are a very immature way of handling this issue. I wanna be a big girl!

Un-goal 4) IMming @work - See above.

Un-goal 5) Cutting Cable - Thing 2 (you'll read more about him later) watches way too much tv. Since I'm the ~~oldest~~, ~~the adult~~ the parent, I suppose that's my fault(heavy sigh, eyes roll). I guess he takes after me, because I know I watch way too much tv also. I've always admired people who have no tvs or rarely watch tv. I watch practically everything. Hell, I watch shows I don't even like. I can't explain why; just give me credit for recognizing a bad decision after I've made it. So my un-goal is to reduce the number of channels I receive (I'm going cold turkey on the wine, so gimme a break), and to reduce the number of hours Thing 2 and I waste in front of the dumbbox. This un-goal will also help the first un-goal.

Un-goal 6) Staying up really late - I think about how much time I can waste in a day, and I mentally fuss at myself for doing this. I usually end up tossing and turning in bed feeling bad about what I didn't do that day, or I veg out watching crapTV. Staying up too late enables un-goal #3, cuz in the morning I'm too tired to get up!

Un-goal 7) Dating - This by far is the easiest un-goal to achieve, as I am not seeing anyone now. Not only that, but there are no, I mean zero, zip, zilch prospects on the horizon. Am I the only one who have ever dated not because that person was so interesting or because there was such a deep attraction, but I was bored and wanted something to do? Hmmm, if I know myself like I know myself, this too is not a good idea. Like I said in an earlier post, I'm on a mission, and I don't have any more time to waste. When bighead gets her act together, she will only entertain a ~~man~~ (aim higher) men worthy of her time and attention. No more scrubs for this scrubette...I wanna quality brother! But first I gotta get rid of my bags (luv u Mz. Badu) and get ta' steppn up my game!

hasty pasta!

The Great Purge of '08

2008-01-07T00:40:00.000-05:00

Do you know the 80/20 rule? It basically says you use 20% of ur stuff 80% of the time. That means 80% of the stuff you have, gets used only 20% of the time. For me, I'd say it's more like 90/10. Over the last few years, I've put on weight...about 40 good pounds I'd say. I don't know about you, but that weight gain has resulted in many bad fashion choices. You know, when you're in denial of how wide your hips are, you're susceptible to purchase any ugly thing. What I wouldn't give for Tim Gunn and Veronica Webb to show up and help me out.

You don't know this, but I'm on a mission. I've got alot to accomplish this year and so my time is very valuable. I thought about selling my clothes on Ebay, and Craig's List, but I'll be happy to get the tax write-off for donating these items. I'd prefer to donate work/church clothes, shoes and purses to someone who may be able to use them. I think I'll save the online sales for my more valuable items. Besides, I think it'll be a lesson well learned on my part to be more discriminating about how I spend my money.

And so begins the great purge of 08...I'm starting with my room, my personal possessions, and later move onto the living/dining and kitchen areas. When I move later this summer, I hope to have much less than I did when I moved into this apartment two years ago.