tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7837516.post-1166571936143069682006-12-19T17:37:00.000-06:002007-02-03T06:49:09.646-06:00Wednesday 11/29/2006 Hot Drunken Foolish Tears Hot tears flow like they haven't fell in so very long. Moments since I dropped you off all these drunken words ring.I feel your suffering. I feel your need.I feel your aloneness.I feel your desire. We scream together.We talk together. and I understand everything.everymotherfucking thing that you say and feel, perfectly,and no one,absolutely no one else gets it, accepts it, feels it, understands it like me.You make me feel open, vunerable, in ways I haven't felt in many many years but different because even with the feelings then, there were differences and I have never, ever felt the same as someone else, the same inside,as I do with you. At the bar, you talk of other men near the young and pretty less damaged, less deep, less real as if that is what you want.instead of me. I'm not the youngest the prettiest the most simple. the most fashionable. I am flawed.I am however the deepest, most real most profoundly honest perfect reflection of your soul, and a hell of a lot better than any of these others in every single possible way that truly matters. I mumble these words I feel them slip on by and I suspect that you don't want me, and maybe never will. It feels like tigers claws in the gut. We laugh.I'm there for you. I offer support and strength, tiny bits of wisdom, I mean every single word with more truth and heart than any words I could ever speak. You are sad and you are alone as am I. You are cursed and blessed with awareness of the emptiness of the world. the void, a curse and blessing I have known for quite some time. We are the same, but you seem new in some ways at this survival endeavor eyes of the poet looking for the beauty behind the suffering I know it, it is real and it is not in the things of the world and absolutly not in the people of the world, not in expectations. But Satori is a gift not easily given. I drop you off. I pull awayand then I am alone too. I feel that empty feeling too. I wish that you wanted me.as I want you. I wish that you saw me.as I see you I wish that you got me.as I get you. I wish that you, feel what I do the way I haven't in so very long if ever. So yeah, I cry warm tears and breathe short empty breaths with a hollow heart. remembering what it is to feel. and if you are alone at home while I type this and you still think that no one gets you. and you still think that no one understands and you still think that no one loves you still think that existence is less than just. and you are crying too, and you are there and I am here then you are right, terribly right. and it is far far worse and alone, than I ever imagined it could be and that is saying a lot. while I sleep the sleep of the damned.POETICUS MUNDIhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17602559936476616574noreply@blogger.com