MuuMuse

MuuMuse is Too Busy Getting Sexy Right Now

2009-08-08T19:05:00.004-04:00

MuuMuse is going indie (or something like that). We're moving the operation to an independent Wordpress-operated server so I can be free like a bird and customize the layout and make it all sexy and such.

As a result, shit might get a little weird around these parts. Don't freak out--everything will be fine. Just give it some time.

xx
b

Lady Gaga is Trying to Eat Your Brain.

2009-08-08T11:27:00.004-04:00

Don't believe me? Just ask the Illuminati--and prepare for the single greatest Pop Music conspiracy theory since "Paul is Dead."

And now you know.

Frankmusik: Complete Me (Album Review)

2009-08-07T17:37:00.006-04:00

Because I'm far too busy to write a proper review, but perhaps even more because he kept us waiting for far longer than any artist should, I'm express-reviewing Frankmusik's debut, Complete Me.

Artist: Vincent "Frankmusik" Frank

Cover Art: C+ (See initial promo cover art.)

Producer: Stuart Price

Which means what to me, exactly?: He's the man behind Madonna's killer 2005 record, Confessions On A Dance Floor.

What does it sound like, in five words or less: Glitchy, jittery electro-pop goodness.

Is it "80's-inspired"?: Yes, but not really in that annoying sense.

Choice (Grade A) tracks: "Gotta Boyfriend?" "Three Little Words"; "Down Down"; "Run Away From Trouble"; "Confusion Girl (Shame Shame Shame)"

Sounds like: Little Boots with a lot more personality and soul, La Roux with slightly less '80's kitsch and frigidity, and everything DIY-electro paired with an urgent vibrato and a faint-yet-endearing lisp.

Hype Factor: The excitement surged starting in 2008, peaked somewhere between than and 2Q 2009, and never really recovered since.

Does it live up to the hype?: No. Well--I suppose it might have back then.

How it will probably fall in terms of ranking: At least Top 20 of 2009, if not Top 10.

Purchase Complete Me on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Mika: We Are Golden (Calvin Harris Remix)

2009-08-07T13:30:00.007-04:00

And now, the Calvin Harris remix of Mika's new single, "We Are Golden."

Now I'm not even pretending that this isn't almost entirely because I know the hipsters at HypeMachine will simply go batty for this one, but it just so happens that this mix proves to be entirely listenable once you give it a fair try. Though I'm not too keen on the single in its original form, the Harris mix makes everything okay with the helpful dollop of fuzzy synths and organ sounds.

Stay gold, Muusers.

DL: Mika - We Are Golden (Calvin Harris Remix)

Find more Mika on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Brooklyn Electronic Music Festival Ticket Giveaway!

2009-08-07T10:37:00.007-04:00

WOW!

My very, very good friends--my Famous Friends, in fact--have just granted me a MuuMuse Excluusive:

Be the first person to e-mail me at muumuse@gmail.com by 3 PM TODAY with your full name and you've got yourself a FREE PAIR of tickets into the Brooklyn Electronic Music Festival TOMORROW!

Please note: This event is 18+ and happening rain or shine!

This is going to be an incredible one day festival with loads of great acts--if you haven't already heard about it, check out the official site or click "Read More" NOW to see the set list--and I'm serious, be quick! I'll update this post once the tickets have been snagged.

Daily B: Apparently Ready for Her Close-Up

2009-08-07T00:55:00.012-04:00

UH GAH-DAYUM.

I honestly have no idea what this is all about yet, but Britney participated in either a photo or video shoot yesterday (you can clearly see the camera in the second shot). She looks gorgeous as ever, but what is going on here exactly? Is this another video? A backdrop? A magazine shoot o some sort? AND WHY IS SHE DRAGGING THAT CHAIR BY HERSELF?! Where are the fearful minions to do all that hard labor? My brain literally hurts.

OH, and be sure to check out this photo above. Aside from this being a stunning mid-hair flip moment, look closely at that magazine--it's a fake! "Me Weekly," featuring a K-Fed like creep on the front cover apparently caught in the act.

Hmm...?

Photos courtesy of BritneyExperts.

SPOTTED: There's a She Wolf in New York City!

2009-08-06T10:58:00.005-04:00

Look what I found: Direct evidence that the She Wolf indeed exists!

On my way to work this morning I discovered paw prints (as pictured above) trailing all the way down Broadway in SoHo. So cool!

Purchase "She Wolf" on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Daily B: Teen Choice Awards 2009

2009-08-05T22:40:00.003-04:00

Britney Spears is now confirmed as a performer for the 2009 Teen Choice Awards airing this Monday.

And let me just be the first to say OMFG BRB PEEING MYSELF.

Daily B: Taking to the VMA Stage Once More?

2009-08-05T21:20:00.005-04:00

From Rolling Stone:

Congratulations, Britney! You’re up for seven VMAs this year! It’s a moment of sweet redemption for Britz, because it means she will return once again to the stage where she’s tasted her sugariest highs and her most Xanax-tical lows. Let’s face it, Britney is the VMAs. She’s the reason we watch every year — it’s how we take the temperature of the Britney universe. She was made for this show, and it was made for her.

Once more, Lady B shall take the stage where she suffered the indignity of the 2007 VMAs, where she mumbled, bumbled, and stumbled through a rendition of “Gimme More” that traumatized her fans, bumping into her scared-looking back-up dancers, rocking her spray-painted abs and one of Bret Michaels’ used hairpieces. As people used to say way back in 2007, it was a “fail,” as well as a “hot tranny mess.” (Recall our first reactions in the 2007 VMAs live blog and photos.)

I know it just says she'll "take the stage," but why mention the 2007 incident and not the 2008 appearance if it wasn't an actual PERFORMANCE coming up? We all know she's back into the swing of things as far as performing goes--it just couldn't be an atrocity this time, right?

I guess it could still go terribly, but I don't think--well, let's face it: I can't make any promises with Britney anymore.

DO WE THINK SHE'S PERFORMING? I'M GETTING ALL JITTER-LIKE AND STRANGE.

Credit to ONTD for bringing that little mention to my attention.

So Who Went Crazy Enough for U2?

2009-08-05T17:38:00.005-04:00

Many, many thanks to all the entries for the U2 I'll Go Crazy...If I Don't Win This Contest!. They were mostly hilarious, and I really appreciated (and took advantage of) all the promised sexual favors and monetary bribery. And now, drumroll please...

The winner of the super fan prize pack is: Muuser Vincente F., who sent in this grammatically dubious yet undeniably heartfelt explanation of just how he'd go crazy if he didn't win this contest:

If I don't win this contest I will go to the nearest ice-cream store, buy 10 gallons of chocolate ice-cream, search Bono and the rest of the band around the world while I eat the ice-cream, otherwise I'd be hungry... When I find the band I will share some of my ice-cream, if theres still is some, with them and then show them via webcam with my laptop all their stuff I own, including the sweated towel Bono threw to the crowd in one of his concerts, and then make them give one of those amazing teachers and oblige them to give muumuse an exclusive interview... and finally after I convince them of everything I will take Bono to another ICE-CREAM STORE and invite him another ice-cream :)...

Thanks for playing everyone!

As usual, keep reading--more giveaways await in the very near future.

Purchase "I'll Go Crazy If I Don't Go Crazy Tonight" on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Mariah Carey's "Obsessed" Continues to Weirdly Lurk Around the Top 10

2009-08-05T12:29:00.008-04:00

Where are we on this, people?

Weeks On Chart: 3
Chart positions: 11-20-17

Are we really going to let the defining song of our generation slip without a fight? Come on--we got "Battlefield" into the Top 10 (prediction VALIDATED!), so why not this? Lest we forget, the lyrics contain ALL of the following references: Jermaine Dupri, Napoleon Bonaparte, Windex, George Foreman.

Fact: Singalongs to Hi-NRG dance mixes of "Obsessed" on the radio are unexpectedly hilarious.

Purchase "Obsessed" on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Daily B: The Queen of the VMAs

2009-08-05T00:23:00.008-04:00

The 2009 Video Music Award nominees have been announced and nobody cares yet again. Well, except for one small detail.

Among the non-musical riff raff and general category fuckery ("Best Video That Should Have Won A Moonman" featuring nominees Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers and George Michael?), one heaven-sent ray of sunlight shines through: SEVEN nominations for Queen B, including Video of the Year, Best Pop Video, Best Choreography, Best Direction, Best Editing, Best Cinematography, and Best Art Direction.

While I don't think she'll take the grand prize (look for our other Queen B, Beysus to snag that one), she's bound to win a few--especially the ones with "Circus" as a nominee.

Oh yeah, and don't count on an appearance this year kiddos--she's going to be touring in between the show's air date. Then again, there is a brief two or three day break in between...oh, who are we kidding? She isn't going to perform.

Though she should.

Click "Read More..." to see the entire nominee list.

VIDEO OF THE YEAR
Beyoncé: Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)
Lady Gaga: Poker Face
Eminem: We Made You
Kanye West: Love Lockdown
Britney Spears: Womanizer

BEST NEW ARTIST
3OH!3
Lady Gaga
Kid Cudi
Drake
Asher Roth

BEST MALE VIDEO
Eminem: "We Made You"
Kanye West: "Love Lockdown"
Jay-Z: "D.O.A (Death of Auto-Tune)"
T.I. featuring Rihanna: "Live Your Life"
Ne-Yo: "Miss Independent"

BEST FEMALE VIDEO
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Lady Gaga: "Poker Face"
Taylor Swift: "You Belong With Me"
Kelly Clarkson" "My Life Would Suck Without You"
Katy Perry: "Hot 'N Cold"
Pink: "So What"

BEST HIP-HOP VIDEO
Eminem: "We Made You"
Kanye West: "Love Lockdown"
Flo Rida: "Right Round"
Asher Roth: "I Love College"
Jay-Z: "D.O.A (Death of Auto-Tune)"

BEST POP VIDEO
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Britney Spears: "Womanizer"
Cobra Starship featuring Leighton Meester: "Good Girls Go Bad"
Lady Gaga: "Poker Face"
Wisin y Yandel: "Abusadora"

BEST ROCK VIDEO
Coldplay: "Viva La Vida"
Kings Of Leon: "Use Somebody"
Green Day: "21 Guns"
Fall Out Boy: "I Don't Care"
Paramore: "Decode"

BEST CHOREOGRAPHY
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Britney Spears: "Circus"
Ciara featuring Justin Timberlake: "Love Sex Magic"
AR Rahman & Pussy Cat Dolls featuring Nicole Scherzinger: "Jai Ho! (You Are My Destiny)"
Kristina DeBarge: "Goodbye"

BEST DIRECTION
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Lady Gaga: "Paparazzi"
Green Day: "21 Guns"
Cobra Starship featuring Leighton Meester: "Good Girls Go Bad"
Britney Spears: "Circus"

BEST EDITING
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Britney Spears: "Circus"
Miley Cyrus: "7 Things"
Coldplay: "Viva La Vida"
Lady Gaga: "Paparazzi"

BEST SPECIAL EFFECTS
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Gnarls Barkley: "Who’s Gonna Save My Soul"
Lady Gaga: "Paparazzi"
Eminem: "We Made You"
Kanye West ft Mr. Hudson: "Paranoid"

BEST CINEMATOGRAPHY
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Coldplay: "Viva La Vida"
Green Day: "21 Guns"
Britney Spears: "Circus"
Lady Gaga: "Paparazzi"

BEST ART DIRECTION
Beyoncé: "Single Ladies (Put A Ring On It)"
Britney Spears: "Circus"
Lady Gaga: "Paparazzi"
Gnarls Barkley: "Who’s Gonna Save My Soul"
Coldplay: "Viva La Vida"

BREAKTHROUGH VIDEO
Death Cab For Cutie: "Grapevine Fires"
Gnarls Barkley: "Who’s Gonna Save My Soul"
Anjulie: "Boom"
Cold War Kids: "I've Seen Enough"
Chairlift: "Evident Utensil"
Bat For Lashes: "Daniel
Major Lazer: "Hold The Line"
Passion Pit: "The Reeling"
Matt & Kim: "Lessons Learned"
Yeah Yeah Yeahs: "Heads Will Roll"

BEST VIDEO (THAT SHOULD HAVE WON A MOONMAN)
U2: "Where The Streets Have No Name"
Dr Dre: "Nuthin’ But A ‘G’ Thang"
Beastie Boys: "Sabotage"
Bjork: "Human behavior"
Radiohead: "Karma Police"
George Michael: "Freedom"
Foo Fighters: "Everlong"
Tom Petty And The Heartbreakers: "Into The Great Wide Open"
OK Go: "Here It Goes Again"
David Lee Roth: "California Girls"

Janet Jackson Announces New Album for 2010

2009-08-04T17:25:00.005-04:00

Perhaps I should have paid more attention to the biography section the first time around.

Later this year, Janet will publish her first book, providing an intimate look at her life and how she has dealt with issues of self-esteem. Janet will reveal aspects not known before about her uniquely successful career not only in music but in television and motion pictures.

The next months and new year will also bring another film starring Janet as she joins Tyler Perry in his sequel, Why Did I Get Married Too, followed by a new album slated to released during the first quarter of 2010.

Accordingly, I am freaking out. ROPE BURN PART 2, PLEASE.

Purchase more Janet Jackson on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Janet Jackson Wants to Tweet With You

2009-08-04T17:10:00.005-04:00

Janet Jackson has completely renovated her official website.

It is now both sparkly and properly equipped for Web 3.0 (including a newly formed Twitter account!) The updated music section is also quite a treat.

Is something new coming soon? God, I hope so.

Dragonette: North American Tour Dates and Gone Too Far (Video Premiere)

2009-08-04T14:15:00.006-04:00

The song you're hearing is "Gone Too Far," the new song off of Dragonette's upcoming album, Fixin' To Thrill. And as for what you're seeing? I'm still trying to figure that one out. Part Travolta, Part Dragonette--and a whole lot of line dancing and cowboy boots. Now where's my chaps when you need 'em?

PLUS, the band has just confirmed a series of North American tour dates, which you can peruse after the cut! Ticket sales begin now through August 7, so get them while you still can. Looks like I've got a new concert for November!

Canadian Tour Dates:
Friday, October 2nd - PETERBOROUGH, ON @ Red Dog
Saturday, October 3rd - MONTREAL, PQ @ POP MONTREAL / LE Cabaret
Monday, October 5th - HAMILTON, ON @ casbah
Tuesday, October 6th - LONDON, ON @ Call the Office
Wednesday, October 7th - WATERLOO, ON @ The Starlight
Thursday, October 8th - TORONTO, ON @ The Mod Club
Monday, October 12th - WINNIPEG, MB @ West End Cultural Centre
Wednesday, October 14th - CALGARY, AB @ The Whisky
Thursday, October 15th - EDMONTON, AB @ Starlite
Saturday, October 17th - VANCOUVER, BC @ Venue
Sunday, October 18th - VICTORIA, BC @ Sugar

U.S. Tour dates:
Monday, October 19th - SEATTLE, WA @ Vera Project
Tuesday, October 20th - PORTLAND, OR @ Doug fir
Thursday, October 22nd - SAN FRANCISCO, CA @ Popscene / 330
Friday, October 23rd - LOS ANGELES, CA @ The Echo
Saturday, October 24th - COSTA MESA, CA @ Detroit Bar
Monday, October 26th - DENVER, CO @ Larimer Lounge
Wednesday, October 28th - KANSAS CITY, MO @ Czar Bar
Friday, October 30th - SPRINGFIELD, MO @ Outland
Saturday, October 31st - CHICAGO, IL @ Sonotheque
Wednesday, November 4th - BOSTON, MA @ Great Scott
Thursday, November 5th - NEW YORK CITY, NY @ Santos
Friday, November 6th - WASHINGTON DC @ DC9

Purchase more Dragonette on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Florence And The Machine: Drumming Song (Video Premiere)

2009-08-03T15:55:00.005-04:00

Florence Welch, you absolute minx!

Here comes the promotional video for the upcoming Florence & The Machine single, "Drumming Song."

Never did I imagine I'd see this type of video from this artist. First she records one of the Top 5 albums of the year, and now THIS: A video that contains CHOREOGRAPHY and bears a slight resemblance to my queen B's "Overprotected"? Be still my heart!

It's a little bit as though "Overprotected" met with Feist's "1 2 3 4" at a medieval coffee shop while reminiscing happily about the video for Kate Bush's "Running Up That Hill". I realize that description makes the end result sound disastrous, but trust me--it is all shades of fabulous.

AND JUST LOOK AT THOSE LEGS. They go on for days! S-t-u-n-n-i-n-g.

Purchase "Drumming Song" on iTunes US | iTunes UK | MySpace | Official Website

Bat For Lashes: Sleep Alone (Video Premiere)

2009-08-03T12:47:00.003-04:00

Parlophone Records just uploaded the video for Bat For Lashes' third single from Two Suns, "Sleep Alone."

It's a bit like the video for Marina & The Diamonds' "Obsessions," except we still really have no idea what the fuck she's finished crafting by the video's end. A robot lover? An interactive Rubik's Cube? I can't be quite certain--this one's up for interpretation. Still, it's an intriguing and creative treat for the eyeballs.

Purchase "Sleep Alone" on iTunes UK | MySpace | Official Website

The Top Four Sexy Summer Dancefloor Sizzlers of 2009

2009-08-03T11:57:00.004-04:00

Hey--hey you! You're at your computer right now and that is totally not sexy. You should be out making poor decisions with your girls/boys--like dropping ice down your cleavage and asking the neighborhood drunkard to lick it out! Luckily I've produced a mini-mini-soundtrack for that, so start slathering on the sunscreen all sexily, because it's time to countdown the Top 4 sexiest summer sizzlers! Sss...

4. Booty Luv - Say It

Okay, so this is the only song that doesn't directly include the word "sexy." Big deal! Booty Luv isn't just a two-piece dance troupe--it's a way of life (like Kabbalah, Scientology, and joining the Tila Army.) Though the exact wording of the chorus faces fervent debate ("If you want my butt-body, come get it, get it" seems to be the most widely accepted translation), the reaction is generally the same: This song makes me feel ridiculously sexy in my pants.

3. Sugababes - Get Sexy

If you've ever been shopping with your lady friends at the mall and a random stranger has yelled "Hey, sexy!" at you, you might have just been sexually assaulted. But more than that--you've officially been deemed as sexy, and that's all that matters! So why not tack on a theme song with your new found lusciousness? Featuring the word "sexy" no less than twenty five times, one spin of "Get Sexy" will have you grossly misrepresenting your own physical attractiveness in no time. Jump on this, you sexy, sexy slut.

2. Madonna - Celebration
Are you there Jesus? It's me, Madonna! What's a sexy list without Madonna, am I right? It's a "Celebration" up in this bitch, and the world's reigning Queen of Pop wants you to get up and dance. Drunk, sober, whatever...this is a judgment-free zone (and you're just going to get naked anyway.) Taking a turn as the sultry seductress (different than her usual role), Madge tempts you with her breathy come-ons ("I guess I just didn't recognize you with your clothes on"). If the nausea doesn't get you first, the sexy will!

1. David Guetta ft. Akon - Sexy Bitch

"I'm trying to find the words to describe this girl without being disrespectful," Akon woefully croons before launching into one of the most monstrous choruses of '09. If "Get Sexy" didn't make it socially acceptable to spin a person around, slap them on the ass, and call them a "sexy bitch," this track surely will. "She's nothing like a girl you've ever seen before / Nothing you can compare to your neighborhood whore." Last I heard, "Sexy Bitch" has been entered in the running for the Poetry Society of America's 2009 Cecil Hemley Memorial Award for its self-searching lyrical quality and general "willingness to go there." Godspeed, Akon.

Daily B: Blonde Ambition

2009-08-03T10:58:00.007-04:00

Attention All:

Britney Spears has gone back to blonde.

As a result, peace and happiness have been restored to this great land. Be on the lookout for signs of the global recession slowing and eventually reversing itself as a result.

Imogen Heap to Debut Tracks Off of Ellipse in London on August 4

2009-08-02T19:51:00.004-04:00

Dear UK Muusers,

Go see Imogen Heap play songs from Ellipse directly from her laptop on August 4 at The Glade in London.

xx
b

Kelly Clarkson Performs Live on Good Morning America

2009-08-02T19:28:00.004-04:00

Here we have Kelly Clarkson performing her unwanted third single, "Already Gone" July 31 on Good Morning America.

This is what we in the industry like to call "making the best of a bad situation." But really, she hit this one out of the park, didn't she? (Central Park, more specifically.) Very controlled, very confident...all in all, another winning performance from the one and only true American Idol.

Purchase "Already Gone" on iTunes | MySpace | Official Website

Benassi Bros: Rocket in the Sky

2009-08-02T01:59:00.009-04:00

A late night treat for all my Muusers: Whether it's the weed, the E, or perhaps a shallow glass of Merlot helping you to settle into a long night's slumber, I've got just the thing to make sure you've traveled far, far into dreamworld.

Enter Benny Benassi, notable DJ behind many of today's hottest club mixes and mashes. Back in 2005, the Italian producer teamed up with his cousin Alle under the monniker Benassi Bros. to release ...Phobia, a sublime collection of trance hits that will one day be given a proper review here at MuuMuse as a result of its complete and utter brilliance.

From that album came several singles including "Rocket in the Sky," released on May 16, 2006. For whatever reason, the song was re-recorded with dance artist Dhany for the single's release, upping the pitch of the original and somewhat ruining the timeless feel of the track. Accordingly, we will not bother ourselves with that rendition.

Instead we will appreciate the original version, written and recorded by Danish singer Sannie Carlson (also known as Whigfield and on this record as Naan).

For many years now (okay, roughly three), "Rocket in the Sky" has provided the perfect infinite white noise for me during the night hours--often I'll even wind up falling asleep to the pulsating throb of ...Phobia (is that weird?) There's something altogether entrancing and lulling about the space-age production coupled with the vocoded-to-death vocals--enough to make me crave the song long after I first stumbled onto the album.

I hope you all enjoy this one as much as I do.

DL: Benassi Bros - Rocket In The Sky (featuring Naan)

August 1: Pop Pondering Of The Day

2009-08-01T13:25:00.004-04:00

What if Alesha Dixon joined the Sugababes?

Daily B: "Kill The Lights" Lyric Explained

2009-07-31T22:20:00.012-04:00

Throughout the entirety of the Circus album, there is perhaps no more disputed lyric than the one found in the first verse of album track, "Kill The Lights":

"If you're feeling froggy, leap."

My initial thought on the matter was simply no, Britney did not just say the word "froggy." I must have heard that wrong. Then I realized that she did. I slowly began getting used to singing this lyric that made no sense whatsoever, eventually moving on with myself in order to go about my daily affairs as usual.

BUT NOW EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED. (Eh? Eh? See what I did there? "Unusual You" reference!)

It has come to my attention that the phrase "feeling froggy" is, in fact, a SLANG TERM. From the literati behind the scholarly reference site, Urban Dictionary:

Froggy - When niggas be all anxious and shit ready to scrap.

So in essence, Britney is saying, "Hey, friend. If you're going to allow a little nervous energy to carry you into a state of aggression, I will not hesitate to pop the top off a can of crazy and bust an umbrella on your skittish, frog-like ass."

The more you know!

Shakira is Web 4.0

2009-07-31T20:33:00.006-04:00

Shakira just tweeted a Twitpic of herself tweeting.

OR DID SHE JUST BLOW YOUR FUCKING MIND?