Where Am I Going Next?

Carina Rainsuit

2008-07-25T14:06:00.001-05:00

Rudderless

2008-07-24T13:20:00.000-05:00

A common topic of conversation between us and our friends recently has been “what do we do after Shuttle”. Most of us are civil servants, so we aren’t really scared that we’ll be out of our jobs. But, there’s a lot of concern about just what our jobs will entail in the years between the last Shuttle flight and the first Orion flight. We’re at the age where most of us could realtively easily accommodate a career change if that’s what we want. But it’s hard to see into the future and know if we’d enjoy what we’ll be doing in 4 years if we stay - because nobody has told us what we’ll be doing in 4 years if we stay.

During round 246 of this discussion today, I finally identified a feeling that I’ve been having periodically over the last year. Rarely at first and then more and more often I’ve been having an uncomfortable feeling of disorientation when talking about this subject. It finally occurred to me today what it is. I don’t know what I want to do with my life over the next 5 years. Many people might find this strange, but at 31 years old this has NEVER happened to me before. I’ve always had a plan. High School. College. NASA. FDO. Suddenly, I’m facing a huge uncertainty in my life, and I’ve simply never had to deal with that before.

Still, though I might be feeling a little rudderless right now, I’m only moderately worried about it. I don’t anticipate not being able to find a job. It’s just I’m not sure how to go about finding one that I like as much as I do flying Shuttle. I guess I could have bigger problems.

Maroon Bells Photos

2008-07-22T00:43:00.002-05:00

I'll write more later about the trip, but for now here are some photos.

by jmendeck

Maroon Bells

2008-07-16T15:49:00.002-05:00

In about an hour we’re off to Colorado for a camping and hiking trip to Maroon Bells Wilderness. I’ve wanted to visit this wilderness area for a while. It is one of the most photographed areas in Colorado. It will be a good place for our first major camping trip with Carina, because Aspen is only a few miles down the road, so any emergency diaper runs can be accomplished. There are also a lot of shortish day hikes we can do.

I am NOT traveling with a laptop. (How 20th century!) I will be traveling with a camera, so I should have some good posts for next week.

I always become sort of useless at work about 2 hours before I’m scheduled to leave for vacation. Unfortunately, if I planned on leaving 2 hours earlier, I’d probably still be useless for 2 hours.

Night Flight

2008-07-14T09:33:00.000-05:00

I love flying at night. I remember that from when I was doing my night flight training, and my flight last night just cemented the impression.

I got to the airport at around 8:10, a little later than planned due to a stop at Walmart to buy a headlamp for my flight bag. I meant to bring Gavin’s with me, but I left it at home by mistake. That’s a purchase I’d been meaning to make for a while anyway. My plan was to get in the air when I could, fly around until it got dark enough, and then do my 3 takeoff and landings to a full stop that I need to be night proficient.

I got off just at sunset, and I was immediately reminded of why I liked flying at night so much. The air is so smooth; it feels like the sensation you get when you’re watching an IMAX movie with a flying clip in it. And it is so pretty. The lights winking on the ground, the sunset playing on the clouds, it’s fabulous. And, it’s so much cooler than it is at noon!

I flew around for a while, looking at stuff and feeling the plane again since it has been a couple weeks. After a while I turned back to the airport. I can never see the flashing beacon at Pearland. I don’t get it, because I can see Ellington’s right away. Never fear, I know that area like the back of my hand and I could see the black area of no lights where the airport is all the way in. The landings were just fine, and I had the pattern all to myself that late on a Sunday night.

Flying at night is going to be a very good option for me for a while. I can go out after Carina is in bed and not stress about missing time with her to go flying. We can get a babysitter and go together. Plus, it was nice to come home not needing an immediate shower; it has been a couple months since that happened.

Photos Galore

2008-07-09T20:56:00.002-05:00

I haven't done albums in months, but today I went nuts and made albums for the second half of Carina's first year. They're on the Baby Countdown page here. It's probably a bit much for most people. But, she has grandparents and they read this site.

Why did I have all this time on my hands? Because I'm sick. Again. This is after the stomach thing last week that had everyone convinced that I was pregnant. My runny nose isn't a patch on Carina's, of course, but unlike some people I do care if I have snot running down my chin. (Ew!)

Really, You Have a Blog?

2008-07-08T10:14:00.002-05:00

During my ascent sim last night, which was boring for me since they aborted every single run, I spent the time comparing baby notes with the guy sitting next to me. At one point I went to the blog to find a picture of Carina to show him. It has been a while since I posted any! We'll take care of that.

Having fun in the garden at Grammy and Grandad's.

Playing distrustfully with that messy birthday cake.

Finally eating some birthday cake.

A great one I got of her first trip to the neighborhood pool.

This is why the dogs have been banished to lie at least 5 feet from her chair during mealtimes.

Onion News Network

2008-07-04T10:34:00.003-05:00

I had heard they were doing this, but I hadn't seen any clips yet. This one was pretty funny, as a parent. Or even if you're not a parent. I especially liked the text headline on the bottom of the screen that kids support increasing military funding to protect toys.

They may give the Daily Show a run for their money soon.

Study: Most Children Strongly Opposed To Childrenâ��s Healthcare

24 Hour Yuk

2008-07-03T09:57:00.002-05:00

Yesterday I woke up with an upset stomach. I suffered through my morning at work, went home after lunch, slept all afternoon on my right side (that felt better for whatever reason), picked up Carina from day care and tried to watch her while curled up on the floor, forced myself to eat a bit of soup when Gavin came home, went back to bed, and woke up this morning feeling fine.

WTF?

Guess I should just be happy that it didn't last longer.

Tonight, Gavin and I have a date night. We got a regular babysitter on Thursdays, theoretically so we can play softball, but since the season hasn't started yet we are going to take advantage and get out by ourselves the next couple weeks. It works out pretty well, actually, as next Thursday is our anniversary.

Need to Hike

2008-06-26T10:37:00.001-05:00

I wrote a long e-mail to Melanie yesterday with a bunch of information and advice on what to do in Hawaii. It made me very nostalgic recounting all the best parts of that trip. Even though Gavin and I had a week long vacation in Florida less than a month ago, I still have a huge travel itch. The vacations we take that I reminisce about for years include hiking, camping, foreign lands, hiking, mountains, and more hiking. We haven’t done anything like that since before I got pregnant, and I’m totally missing it.

Becca and I have been talking at a half-serious level about going to Colorado for some hiking in the next month. I think it needs to happen. It will be a bit different going with Carina, but she needs to get used to sleeping outdoors from time to time. We probably won’t actually backpack this time out, though. Hmm… Need to research good car camping locations. :)

Check Ride Recap

2008-06-25T13:52:00.000-05:00

Regarding my check ride... It was actually pretty vanilla compared to some of the other stories I’ve heard. I flew with an awesome lady who is one of the top acrobatic pilots in the country. She gave me a very low-key oral exam, just making sure I had things mostly stored off in my head or easily accessible to look up. Like most professional pilots, I think she was a bit amused at the lengths I will go to to plan a cross-country around class-B airspace. We went flying and I zipped through all the maneuvers. I wallowed a bit in the recovery from the power-on stall, but although it wasn’t the most graceful recovery I think it did show her I understood why the airplane was behaving the way it was. I got a bit low on airspeed during my simulated engine failure, which she forgave. I was also a bit fooled by the completely limp windsock and didn’t do my good crosswind technique on the last landing or two. My shortfield landing stopped short of a taxiway she didn’t expect me to be able to make, though. :)

On Saturday, I took Gavin and Pat out in the 150 as my first passengers. I think they both had fun. We told my daredevil niece that she could go next year. That kid isn’t even 4 yet, but she wanted to ride the roller coaster at Kemah.

I sent my sister’s family off on the 2-day car trip back to Wyoming this morning. I hope the kids make it in good spirits. They’re doing a LOT of driving this summer.

Trial versus Tribunal

2008-06-23T08:31:00.003-05:00

The recent Supreme Court decision will have important ramifications for the future of anti-terrorism efforts by the U.S. The U.S. military, in response to an earlier decision by the Court, had already granted detainees much more legal process than required for enemy combatants by the Geneva conventions. Apparently that wasn't enough for five justices.

I Passed!

2008-06-20T15:46:00.002-05:00

I don't really have time right now to do it justice, but as of yesterday I am an official Private Pilot! Several folks came over last night to celebrate, which was really fun. I think I might take Gavin and Pat out for rides tomorrow.

We took Caroline, Jackson, and Carina to Moody Gardens today. Everyone liked the acquarium a lot. Carina had a great time watching the fish. The rainforest wasn't as good for her, maybe because she was getting really hungry.

I haven't been capturing the best moments of this visit in photos yet. Caroline is being very sweet with Carina, but I seem to miss those moments and then by the time I get the camera out, one or the other isn't as happy anymore.

Iraq is Improving

2008-06-15T13:11:00.003-05:00

It's been clear to several on the ground since last fall that the situation is improving dramatically. There are a number of reasons for this. One is the surge of American troops, as the numbers previously there were too few. But much of the credit goes to the Iraqis.

Now that the US primaries are over, this is starting to make the news. The Economist has a decent summary of where Iraq is. The more who read it, the better. I agree with its statement that America must remain flexible to conditions in Iraq, and not make a unilateral promise to withdraw troops regardless of the situation.

Please don't become BSG 1980

2008-06-14T22:53:00.003-05:00

That's what I was repeating out loud 15 minutes from the mid-season finale when Jen and I watched it tonight. It was great, there's been a lot of stuff happening in the last few episodes as they begin to close up the series with half a season left.

Anyways, I'll post the rest in the comments. With spoilers.

My Brain Is in the Computer

2008-06-12T16:54:00.003-05:00

I was doing some long-range schedule/vacation planning today, and I suddenly realized that the reason it was so hard I have no holidays on my work calendar for the rest of the year. What gives? Turns out, I needed a service pack update to get the next couple years of holidays in. Hmmmm. Maybe that's why I was having so much trouble remembering which weekend Memorial Day was this year. :o I have started having to write things in my calendar like "Gavin in CA" or "flight bag to work". Otherwise, I find myself getting angry at Gavin for being at work so late when he's on a plane over Arizona or trying to fly the plane in a skirt.

I keep thinking that next month, it will be calmer. I won't have as much to do next month. Every month, though, by the 3rd or 4th my calendar is looking quite full. This mission was supposed to give me lots of time without many interruptions to catch up on some stuff. Today was only the 4th day I have had in my office, though, and a few of those have been short days due to doctor's appointments, outside commitments, or going to do my last pre-check ride lesson.

That's right, I'm GO to schedule my check ride. My instructor said if I fly like I did this morning I should pass no problem. Why am I suddenly nervous? Like I have to take a test or something. :) Anyway, we'll see how fast I can get an examiner scheduled. I'd like not to have to use Alpha Wolf if I don't have to. (Jose, shame on you for not having a post I could link to for that!)

iPhone 2.0 in 60 seconds!

2008-06-11T11:30:00.002-05:00

It took Apple 142 minutes to talk about the iPhone 2.0 a few days ago. Someone was nice and condensed it down... it's fun to watch. The price is cheap enough that maybe I'll get one now.

Mid-June Already

2008-06-10T10:11:00.002-05:00

We are told Carina took three steps at daycare yesterday. I've seen her take about 1/2 of a step myself. I can't believe we're almost to the walking phase. I expect she'll be getting around pretty well by the time her cousins get here next week.

Speeking of her cousins coming - where did the last month go? Last time I thought about this it was almost a month away and all of a sudden it is next week.

I'm stuck in a two-day meeting of which probably about 1 hour cumulative is going to be interesting to me. I hate that. At least I remembered to bring my laptop so I can work on my e-mail.

insomnia

2008-06-06T02:35:00.003-05:00

being up this late kinda sucks

but listening to karate kid, part ii, is a nice distraction

and by nice, I mean amusing

Florida Wrap

2008-06-04T23:18:00.001-05:00

We're back. Our last three days in Florida were spent at the beach, and at Disney World. It has been years since we were at Disney, so we had a great time seeing all the updates. We made the most of our two days there; we visited Epcot, Hollywood Studios, and Magic Kingdom. We rode the new Toy Story ride (SO COOL!), saw Fantasmic, the SpectroMagic Parade, and the MK fireworks. We stayed out until midnight yesterday, even though we knew we had to get up before 7:00 to leave for the airport.

Florida was amazingly fun, but we were very ready to get back. We were both pointing out babies around Carina's age all the time in the parks. Carina was asleep when we got to Grammy and Grandad's, but she didn't make us wait too long. I heard her talking in her crib, so I cracked the door and stuck my head in. At first, she just stared at me. Then her eyes got huge - I mean HUGE - and she started running in place. Very satisfactory reaction. :)

So, now we're home, and tomorrow I go to work to see if the fact that we're flying means I'm less behind than I normally would be... I can hope. We actually got back home at around 4:00 this afternoon, so I have at least had time to do some stuff around the house.

"What does the space program represent to you?"

2008-06-01T09:08:00.004-05:00

I was asked this question inside the Saturn V building at KSC, an hour before launch. A self-described reporter with a slight Dutch(?) accent was wandering around the crowds and asking them this question. I didn't mind the question; in fact, I felt it was a rather good one. I thought about my answer for a few seconds.

"The space program represents the challenges that humanity can overcome, and our hopes for the future."

Not a great sound bite, I suppose, but not too bad. I would love it if I could come up with stuff like that without having to think hard about it. Feel free to add your own views in the comments.

T+2 minutes

2008-05-31T22:46:00.004-05:00

The launch was great! We were maybe 3 or 4 miles away from the pad, and plumes were brilliant against the blue sky as the shuttle climbed. The photo above is just a few moments after SRB separation, at the full-res you can see the pinpoint of light as the shuttle races away from the 'dirty' SRB exhaust clouds. And if you zoom in, you can make out the SRBs tumbling away but they're only a few pixels big.

We're meeting some friends tomorrow and maybe we'll hang out on the beach near Canaveral. Mom and Dad have been emailing us some photos of Carina, and with those plus the ones Sarah put online we're managing to not call every day and see how things are going. :)

L-1

2008-05-30T21:56:00.002-05:00

If you've been watching the Flickr screen, you'll see that we are in Florida. There are an amazing number of friends and acquantainces here for this launch as well. We got our tours today, which I have to say was a little underwhelming. They wouldn't let us into any buildings; something about stacking SRBs in the VAB and not wanting 200+ people tramping through.

We went to see Blue Man Group tonight. That was fun. I've never seen so much toilet paper in my life.

Tomorrow, hopefully, we get to see Discovery go to space!

Happy Birthday, Baby

2008-05-27T09:52:00.003-05:00

One year ago today (in about 3 hours at 12:45 PM), Carina arrived. It is absolutely unbelievable that it has been that long. And yet, also unbelievable that we ever existed without her. It seems like her little arms around my neck and her little face snuggled into my shoulder are as necessary to my existance as breathing.

Her party yesterday was a huge success. She pulled in quite a haul, as expected. Everyone loves shopping for kids. In addition to enough clothing from Grammy and Grandma to keep her dressed to the 9s for the next year (or at least 6 months) of her life, she got some very cool toys. There were several aviation-themed gifts, including this Elmo ride-along airplane that has more buttons on it than Cari's Prius. This was both an adult and child favorite; Becca set about getting it out of the packaging right away as Aerik was fascinated.

The slip-n-slide got lots of use. ("Not for adult use", whatever. I think we proved that thing is fun for ages 3 to at least 31.) They've gotten quite a bit more sophisticated since our Version 1.0 we had as kids. I remember it was always a challenge setting up the sprinkler to evenly wet the slide, but that has been taken care of by the addition of an integrated sprinkler tube on the side. And then there is the splash pool at the end - definitely satisfying. The water in the wading pool was also dirtied with grass clippings from all the comings and goings. I never turned on the sprinkler as it didn't seem to be missed.

Carina opened her presents, and then had to go take a nap. She woke up in time for cake, but she was still groggy and wouldn't eat any of it. She did play with the frosting a bit on her hands, thoroughly decorating the table in front of her. No cake on the face, unfortunately. Maybe we'll try again tonight with a smaller piece.

The Pen

2008-05-21T22:49:00.003-05:00

I got an announcement at work this week for a "special project" team that interests me. Thinking that I'm might apply for this team, I sat down tonight to work on a resume (haven't done one of those since college) and the requested short essay about why I'm applying. I haven't done any persuasive writing in a long time. In fact, setting aside e-mail and technical writing for work, I think this blog is probably the only (semi)public writing outlet I have had since college.

I've always considered myself a decent writer. Maybe with a bit of a tendency toward pomposity at times, but decent. I felt totally overboard while writing my essay. Metaphores. Symbolism. I think I learned about that stuff a decade or so ago.

Engineers should have to write more. They ought to force us to write pieces on why our projects are important to humanity. Tell a story about working our first Shuttle mission. Write science fiction about what space exploration will look like in 50 years. Something to force me to go beyond powerpoint bullets more than once a decade.