My Feelings' Personified

Revamp Complete

2008-07-06T18:24:00.002+08:00

Ok... so I've decided to do away with all the irritating links and the irritating sidebar. this is so weird... like... so naked...

Well, for more content, you can definitely link on the sections above~! Although perhaps the portfolio will be the most interesting...

Ok, I'm happy... this website is like... 2 months overdue?? F*ck la...

Oh wells... now's the process of touching things up, and focusing on my GO-FAR website. Go visit our blog when you have the time la, very nice photos there. (Ok, that statement is totally himbotic.)

Meanwhile, have fun guys~

Cheers,
Johnson

Major Revamp

2008-05-07T01:49:00.001+08:00

A big revamp of this weblog (to incorporate my new portfolio) is coming soon!! stay tune ppl... that is if u're still interested in reading this seldom-updated blog...

For a sneak... click here.

Filament '08 : WKWSCI EBM Final Year Projects Screening

2008-04-26T20:33:00.002+08:00

Hey peeps,

FILAMENT'08 is the event of the year where 12 video and audio final-year projects from the Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information @ NTU will be screened.

Date: 2nd & 3rd May 2008 (Fri & Sat)
Time: 7:30pm on both days
Venue: Singapore Arts Museum, Glass Hall

Different video/audio projects will be screened for each of the two days.

The humble me would really like to invite everyone to come, cos I am involved in soundtracking for two of the video projects (again, this year), one on fri and one on sat. (don't ask me why like that... i didn't plan this)

Hope to see anyone of you who's still reading this blog there!!

PS. My online reel will be up VERY soon.

<陌声>之歌

2007-10-12T07:54:00.001+08:00

聆听
词曲：张正勇
演唱：陈珮文

这片宁静，美得可怕⋯⋯
作曲：张正勇
编曲：张正勇

<陌声> 的结束，另一个就要开始了

2007-10-07T00:03:00.000+08:00

十月五号过了……
期待了整整两个月的首映会也结束了……

我开始又患上post-event depression。我会怀念这次的首映会的，因为毕竟这是我的第一个首映会。

惋惜的是，很多我亲爱的，都无法来。来的，多数是我传播系的朋友，之前的朋友，只来了一个。

难道，我这个朋友，已到了一个让人“遥不可及”的地位了吗？我的身份是否已成了一种“威胁”与“恐吓”呢？

我，是个很在乎朋友的人。
我，会被这种小事影响的。

~//~

回到首映会吧。

我听到的是，很多很多的“很好啊”。

这种意见固然好听，但感觉上没有批判的评语来的真诚。
或许是因为自己是个自虐的人，总是会觉得自己做得不够好，所以总希望朋友对我说出我不足的地方。
因为镜子，永远只能显示反过来的自己。

~//~

我很想感谢光正他们，因为他们相信我。他们真的很相信我。

我不知道怎么可以表达我对他们的万分谢意。24小时了，我还在想我应该SMS什么给他们。

~//~

那些来支持我的朋友。谢谢你。
因为……

你们让我哭了。

勇

陌声 Silent

2007-09-30T00:30:00.000+08:00

Film: 陌声 Silent
Directed by: Wang Junjie

Wee Kim Wee School of Communication and Information presents
In Association with derail productions
a Wang Junjie film
"陌声 Silent"

Starring Jodi Chan
Produced by derail productions Ang Guangzheng Darren Tan Wang Junjie Zhang Zhengyong
Edited by Ang Guangzheng Darren Tan
Director of Photography Darren Tan
Art Direction Wang Junjie
Original Music by Zhang Zhengyong
Written by Wang Junjie & Zhang Zhengyong
Directed by Wang Junjie

Website: derailproductions.blogspot.com

Synopsis: 陌声, silent, explores the world of sounds through the life of a deaf girl.

Trailer: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VUGaXzLli0o

Details of screening:
Date: 5th October 2007 (Friday)
Time: 7:30pm
Venue: *scape (opposite Cathay Cineleisure)
FREE ADMISSION!

For more enquiries, please contact me (91788275) or email (derailproductions@gmail.com).

无题

2007-09-20T12:21:00.000+08:00

因为他不会明白⋯⋯
          我才会自我虐待。

因为他理智的心态
          连我抒发情感的空间也不存在。

因为我没有勇气
          命才会被运主宰。

一人一半

2007-08-16T23:01:00.000+08:00

像一支风筝

2007-08-16T02:22:00.000+08:00

又感到emo了......

刚刚躺在床上，努力试着睡时，突然觉得我找到了一个非常适合自己心情的一个比喻：我就像一支风筝。

前几天，有个朋友对我说了：“你这个人，前途已经是几乎写好了，就没有像普通人一样要忧虑未来。”我不由自主地发怒了。我好像从来没有提高声量骂过这位朋友（虽然有在他面前对“其他”人怒吼过），所以对自己来说，也在那刹那间顿住。

基本上，我不喜欢大家把我看作是一个“非普通”人。我的遭遇，真的只是因为自己的嘴巴太多，每次会引人注目，所以自己能做什么，大家都知道。

我觉得我自己身边，真的有更多更有才华的人，有更多“前途已定“的人。我真的好羡慕他们，而我的羡慕，是默默的，因为我知道自己的”羡慕“掺杂着”妒嫉“。

而我只是觉得我自己是一支风筝，因为大家都仿佛在看着我飞，在欣赏着我在飞，在赞叹我的”自由“翱翔。但我始终是被牵着线的，任由在地上的主人拉扯，任由风儿吹摆。也许线一断，我或许还能飞，但风一停，我也将落下。

那我想做什么？

我想变成气球，靠着自己超轻的重量，飞上天空。即使生命短暂，至少是靠自己的力量，绽放光彩。

鸟更好，想飞就飞，想落就落。

我现在要走的路，在新加坡只有少数人走过，成功更加少。而我清楚知道，很多时候我靠的是别人的介绍与推荐的。我好像几乎从来没真正去为自己打造未来。我这风筝，还能飞多久？

06/07结束了。我开心。但07/08的开始，让我沮丧。我能否真正为自己打造未来，还是就打算在光碟店里，在别人的鼻子下，度过一生？

*突然感情用事*,
yong

Important Announcement

2007-06-26T18:22:00.000+08:00

I will NOT be contactable from

28th June 2007
to
8th July 2007
I have decided to give myself a break and go on a hiatus.

Please do not try to call me, you can leave an sms but i cannot guarantee you i'll be replying them. You can also reach me via email at jumbosale@innocent.com, but again i cannot guarantee replies too.

Why such drastic actions? 'Cos i've been living my life like it's others and i'm going live my own life for myself for just 11 days. Happy? If not, heck, I don't give a damn.

Wahahahahahahaha~

*going-ga-ga*,
Ah Yong

Another Reason Not To Sleep So Early...

2007-06-17T04:57:00.000+08:00

Time now, peeps, as I am writing this, is 4:58am... Am kept awake by the commotion happening RIGHT outside my window now.

I'm eavesdropping on a conversation, not that I'm TRYING to eavesdrop, just that it's really happening outside my window anyway.

My neighbour's son (whom I've never seen in my life since they moved in) apparently invited his whole gang over to celebrate someone's birthday.

And they created a hell of a noise.

My wall has become a bass drum that was constantly beating to some Hindi music apparently... And, as expected, the police came. Thank goodness.

And now? My neighbour is trying to talk himself (and his gang) out of this situation, claiming they have total rights as a Singaporean to do whatever he (or rather, they) wants.

And the guy wanted to give in by saying "ok ok, fine, we all go to sleep and keep quiet and we all make love and peace ok", then he and his gang of friends will erupt into great bursts of laughter right in front of the police. *roll eyes* either they're dumb or... they're dumb.

This is the second time the police came around. Or rather... from the conversation, the police apparently has been waiting downstairs and overheard noise coming back out of the house and came back up to get the gang to the police station.

What pure dramatic noise.

And all this noise is keeping me up...

Thanks for the belated birthday gift, neighbours (whom I've never met and talked to).

*i-hate-it-when-i-have-bad-neighbours*,
Ah Yong

Birthday Wishes 2007

2007-06-15T00:12:00.000+08:00

On MSN:

Yeokie @ 10:31pm:
happy birthday!! in 2 hours time!

斯鏗~ @ 12:00mn:
happy 23rd bdae~ whee

婉晶* @ 12:02am:
恭喜老人又成功的老了一歳 =D

Using SMS:

Kairu @ 12:01am:
happy bithday johnson!! surprised i know ur birthday right! heh enjoy this special day of urs! :D

Shi Si @ 12:15am:
Hey, happy bdae! [...] Hope that you will have a great bdae this yr [...] ;-p btw, i got u a bdae present! Hope u'll like it.

Minwei @ 01:30am:
I hope i didn't rmb wrongly but its ur bday right? happy 23rd bday! may u gain more weight n look better this year! haha... n pls jia you with what u r doing right now. it will be e best bday gift for urself. like sk n e rest of them, im behind u k =)

Yanhui @ 01:53am:
Happy birthday!

Ailing @ 02:34am:
Happy birthday big boss! May all your wishes come true and happy days for e rest of e yr!

Zhuo Min @ 09:53am:
Yo Happy birthday!

Rongjun @ 12:14pm:
Happy birthday dude.. Work hard in theatre and dont steal my rice bowl in sound design. Thank you.

Xiuwen @ 01:41pm:
Go get drunk and establish yourself as a twenty three year old. Lol. happy birthday.

Called Me:

Meijun @ 12:04am:
我(也是)要去睡了，可是特別打電話想說: Happy Birthday!

Left a friendster message:

Keith (SAFBand) @ 04:46am:
yo~ happy b'day~ ur vcds still with me...

命運

2007-05-29T19:22:00.000+08:00

PASSWORD: the same as the one used for my laptop

Pirates' Writers Are At Wit's End?

2007-05-29T06:11:00.000+08:00

Dear readers, I must apologize for all the grammatical and spelling mistakes that I have made in this review as I have written it in a rushed state of mind. Please do feel free to correct me by adding comments (not putting on the tagboard please) by clicking on comments at the end of this article.

The Pirates of the Caribbean blockbuster epic trilogy comes to a close after pillaging over US$1 billion (S$1.6 bil) across global waters in the wake of Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl and Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man's Chest, but is the new instalment Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End a worthy one to the witty and clever humour that the first two instalments have provided?

I, Johnzzon, the avid movie reviewer, am finally back in action after a three years hiatus from reviewing to bring you his latest review on his latest favourite franchise. :)

Firstly, I must admit I'm a sucker at Hollywood Blockbusters, and you must bear in mind that this reviewer is also a fan of a lot of other "franchise movies" as well, such as Lord of the Rings, Spiderman, Star Wars and many more. Yet, I must say this doesn't necessary mean I like every movie in each franchise. And so, with this in mind, I hope you do see I'm already very impartial and hopefully fair in the comments I make.

Let's start off by taking a look at the original movie behind the Pirates trilogy, The Curse of the Black Pearl. What works for me in this particular movie was how the writers and the director make it a point to know that they were creating a pirates movie, and not a movie about pirates. And not only any pirates movie, but one inspired by the original Walt Disney ride.

Hence, we get all the stereotypes of a pirates movie: walking the plank, the pirates accent, cannons, rum, and many more. Yet, we have lots of twist in the stereotypes that we find the writers like to include as little parodies that viewers may or may not catch.

And that is one thing I like. They go all out to assume the viewers are clever enough to know the homages they were paying and the parodies they were playing with. They were not afraid to say that if one didn't strike with a viewer, there will be plenty more others for that viewer.

And besides, we have a damsel not really in distress played by an actress with very good comedic timing: Keira Knightley, a weird pirate with a broken wrist and a Scottish accent played by the eccentric Johnny Depp.

This franchise is one that will be action comedies, very well established in this very first film with witty lines and eccentric characters. Seldom do we see focus on so much characters in a Hollywood movie nowadays, yet this movie is so character driven that you soon start loving even the soldiers who may have less lines than say the Tyrannosaurus Rex in Jurassic Park. (No offence to Mr Spielberg, I still like your movie)

The second movie, Dead Man's Chest, continues in this tradition, not only continuing to pay homages to traditional pirates stereotypes, but also reference itself to the first movie as well. The writers clearly have fun poking at the exact thing they wrote for the first movie.

While the action sequences may have becoming prolonged and more dreading, and the plot becoming more confusing with each character getting his/her own subplot, the performances and the script allowed me (and my friends, but apparently not the American critics) to last through the movie, very much wanting to know how the third one will end off the gargantuan cliffhanger at the end of it.

FINALLY we reach the third. The prologue sequence was moving and the buildup to rescuing our favourite Captain Jack Sparrow is fun and imaginative. It felt like I was sitting through a Hayao Miyazaki film as the ship (carrying our lovely Elizabeth Swann, handsome Will Turner and back-from-the-dead Captain Barbossa) journeyed through different terrains to reach the World's End.

When they got back to the real world, that's when I felt the writers (Ted Elliot and Terry Rossio) were running out of ideas to clear all the mysteries they left hanging at the end of Dead Man's Chest. It all turned away from the original direction the series has been moving towards. It was no longer an action comedy, and it became a brainless, or rather very confusing, journey to kill off our irritatingly cunning Lord Beckett and the tentacles-filled-face Davy Jones.

The new characters developed never had a chance to develop their stories to play a crucial role in the ultimate battle, and the old characters were receiving too much screen time repeating brainlessly what they had been doing for the past two films. Somehow, when I saw a particular character grew big when a supposedly very magical sequence started, that's when I know the movie is beginning to flop.

The twist at the end (ie, whoever is stabbing Davy Jones' heart) is rather unexpected, but somehow, it didn't matter to me anymore. I just wanted it to end, and wished there will be a fourth movie made to remind me why I loved the original movie so much.

Meanwhile, I'm lucky to have bought the double disc DVD special edition to Dead Man's Chest. Even the making of is more exciting than the second half of this third instalment.

RATING: 2.5 out of 5 stars

I'm At World's End!! Whee~

2007-05-27T08:14:00.000+08:00

It's 8:22am... and wow, i lasted the whole of last night and i still couldn't sleep. Or rather i'm pushing myself not to sleep, cos i know i had to wake up. So, what happened?

It's another first for me! I held a movie marathon of a trilogy, with two movies at my house and one that is currently showing in the theatres! er... yes, we ARE going to the theatres to watch, i did NOT download to watch.

And so, which trilogy is it?

Ta-dah!:

Am quite excited, cos I'm really a fan of this franchise after knowing all the little little trivia behind this movie.

I don't care about how accurate the movie is or anything, and i blardy HATE ppl who point out so BLATANTLY obvious that the singapore portrayed is not singapore historically. OH bugger... which pirate in the whole history of mankind behaves like Jack Sparrow? And pirates being walking skeletons or rotting sea creatures? *roll eyes* it's a fantasy film for god sake.

What i'm really hooked on is the writing and the lines, and how the scriptwriters (ted elliot and terry rossio, for those of you so ILL-informed) brilliantly wrote little little lines in that play tribute to the original theme park ride AND their own original movie for pirates: The Curse of the Black Pearl.

One simple line like "Why is the rum ALWAYS gone?" is so funny in the second movie, that i get disturbed when people are SO obviously not laughing.

Another simple line like "oh" when jack sparrow falls into the stupid pit in the 2nd movie? it's written. and it already tells a lot. it's so un-hollywood, yet the casting and the directing is so hollywood. it's like a blend, a mixture, and somehow it works for me. So! "At World's End", I'm having DAMN high hopes for you.

BUT meanwhile... It's 8:29... peeps are waking up 15 min later... maybe shd catch some eyeclose... mmm~ the rest of them?

*feeling-DAMN-high-now*,
Ah Yong

Post #300

2007-05-14T04:43:00.000+08:00

Wow... I remembered entering my Post #200 happily... and i didnt think it wud be so fast until my #300, but i got a shock when i saw i had 299 posts in my account. this is fast.

It's 14th May, midway thru the first month of my holidays. having said that, i feel like i've pretty much wasted a lot of time away, doing nothin', mostly spent in coffee joints leeching power and looking up some stuff for my upcoming trip.

Am going back to Taiwan in 1.5 months' time. back? haha... i don't know if i should say "taiwan feels like home", but my feelings are around there. somehow, letting taiwan be my escaping destination is kind of generating these feelings.

~//~
I don't want to plan stuff ahead.

I hate sms-es and emails that say "are you free this coming XXXXday? i was hoping to meet u somewhere to settle something" what if i like it being free? what if i need the "free"ness to do something else?

somehow, i see the cons of having a freelancing career, 'cause everyone else will just happily assume you're free almost everyday.

what are holidays anyway?

~//~
I'm so not growing up.

I felt grown up when I was in my secondary sch and jc days. I am not feeling that now.

Things were simpler then. "don't friend then don't friend lor" is such a childish statement, yet there were no really hard strings attached to it. now, so much things are put into "friendship" that i wish i can tell a person "don't friend then don't friend lor".

Don't tell me not to think so much. Don't tell me this is the fact of life. Don't tell me to grow up.

'Cause i've said the same things to others as well.

~//~
別人從屁股放屁，我卻每天每天說要革命
就算是整個世界，把我拋棄
而至少快乐伤心我自己决定
所以我说就让他去
我知道潮落之后一定有潮起

*bah*,
Ah Yong

Recommended Songlist #1

2007-05-08T00:10:00.000+08:00

Okay, this is gonna be a first for me. I'm going to compile a list of songlists that i find good or helpful, thanks to my iPod shuffle. haha~ because it was on shuffle mode, sometimes songs just seem to go so well after each other, that sometimes i really want to write it down somewhere... And now I shall! So BEHOLD, MY FIRST SONGLIST!

SONGLIST #1
給: 那些早上(或下午)醒來，心情很遭糕，卻又因約了朋友所以得出門的你們。

#01 蘇打綠﹣是我的海
傷感的編曲和坦白的詞句，仿佛真的坐在海邊，讓腦裡一直浮現無法回答的問題，才發覺不是自己看海，而是讓海看自己。既然心情不好，就不要勉強自己去聽去接受快歌。先讓自己沉浸在這種歌吧。

#02 蘇打綠﹣相對論 IV
《是我的海》完後，鋼琴的旋律仍吊在空中。《相》的開頭恰好配合了《是》的結尾，卻又暗示了新的開始，感覺上在說：在《是》裡吶喊夠了吧，現在應該開是放開心情了。因為有同樣蘇打綠的青峰主唱，所以更加強了這個感覺。

#03 孫燕姿﹣咕嘰咕嘰
誒，《相》的超快吉他編曲，成功地把心情HIGH了一下，繼續來一首快歌。“谁比谁好/能差到多少/迟早都要/向上帝报到”，讓人聽了不由得想叛逆一下下。

#04 動靜樂團﹣命運
想叛逆是嗎？把貝多芬的名曲拿來玩，又ROCK又RAP，夠叛逆了吧？哈哈~

#05 S.H.E.-怎么办
完夠了那種叛逆自我的，來一下一首甜得無厘頭的歌。其實聽S.H.E.她們唱VERSE的歌詞，的確蠻讓人HIGH的。:)

#06 陳綺貞﹣旅行的意義
該慢下來一下了。讓陳綺貞的聲音，把人帶入一個“狂我”又“大膽”的世界，卻又不會失去自我。聽她的歌，真的很舒服。

#07 黃舒駿﹣男女之間
不知道為什麼this song can work，可能因為陳綺貞和黃舒駿都是很有個性創作派歌手吧。

Sorry that this song list ended a bit improperly. Hopefully it works for you. :) do feel free to insert songs after the last song. haha~ any suggestion for #08, #09 and #10? ;)

Ah Yong

是我的海

2007-05-07T04:49:00.001+08:00

shi-wo-de-hai, originally uploaded by jumbosale.

我乃“神”？

2007-05-02T06:34:00.000+08:00

這個學期，我多了兩個外號：1)"神" 和 2)"爸爸"
I have gotten two more nicknames at the end of this semester: 1) "God" and 2) "Daddy"

I'm not very sure if I should be feeling very happy or sad. I'm not "god", and I don't really know how this nickname came about. Okay, maybe I do, just that I don't really want to admit it. Perhaps somehow it's just how computers are afraid of me and they seem to respond well to me and so I manage to fix a lot of technical problems my fellow coursemates are facing. Then again, there are some "fixing" that is mainly due to me just figuring out how to use the softwares and being able to hit the right buttons.

I'm not god. I don't want to be. 'cause it makes me... look like I'm capable of a lot of things, but I know there are areas I can't handle. I really want to regurgitate that I'm not a leader, at least in the field of management and business.

I don't want to be a daddy too. I don't know why. "Daddy" makes me feel old, emotionally and psychologically. It makes me think that people do know I care a lot about everyone, but no one really returns that caring somehow.

But an occasional chocolate bar does make my day (or rather "night" most of the time).

~//~

This semester passed by relatively uneventfully, not learning much, and not achieving much. The courses I take are like just pushing myself to do things I normally don't do frequently.

Like play-writing, like web-designing, like newspaper-article writing.

I don't learn much, at least I know these won't apply in the field of work I'm going to be involved in, perhaps with a slight exception of "play-writing", but hey, "screenplay writing" is really different from "play-writing" anyway.

~//~

But friendships do strengthened this semester.

I really got to know more in depth about more people. New real friends were found, like wanjing, jessie, jj, weiyang; old bonds were really strengthened, like with sk, xiuwen, rongshan, darren, guangzheng...

Somehow it's ironic, cause there are so much lesser people in sch this semester with ppl left for exchange and internship.

~//~

EBM. My destination for the next semester.

FYP group. Formed.

FYP project, now thinking about what we're going to do.

Two years seem to have been planned out.

Or is it not?

~//~

I want to treasure the friendship. I don't know how things will turn out. I hope nothing bad happens, I hope I don't do the wrong thing.

Three years in army taught me honesty and frankness doesn't pay, especially in pseudo friendships. That means I should have more faith right?

~//~

See? I'm not god. Ok, fine, I'm the technical god, I can patch wires, I can design well with adobe softwares, I can create soundtracks. But I still think I'm just a jack of all trades, but GOD of none. I still need Uncle Tan and Uncle Vincent. No la, I'm not whining. I just wish I was really god, 'cause then I can take things into control, but I'm still just human with emotions.

~//~

I don't know what I wanna say with this post actually. I know I'm just whining.

But I haven't been able to sleep with a few nights spent alone at home. I don't like this feeling. I always thought I'm a loner, being able to walk down orchard road or bugis street shopping alone. I can't anymore.

Is it good? I think it's good actually.

But somehow, I felt I've become dependent on friends. Am I too dependent on them?

~//~

I can't have a partner, not yet. I know I can't. With the kind of workload, with the kind of working lifestyle, how to have? It'll be like so unfair.

And I don't know if I can acknowledge my liking.

~//~

我，張正勇，乃凡人。

With the FYP screening over, more people have come to acknowledge me with my skills. I don't know if it's good or bad, 'cause it'll make me more busy.

I hope I have time for myself, for my friends, for new skills, for old hobbies and for a new relationship.

~//~

Yesterday, suddenly felt like seeing who blogged about my hall production (which I wrote and directed). Did a search of "ntu" "store of memorabilia" on google and found:

POST #1
Last night i went to watch the NTU HALL 2 Drama production "The store of Memorabilia" at the Jubille Hall. Although it was a simple drama production, i really enjoyed it.

It keeps me thinking, every one of us has memories, either good or bad. But how many of us cherish our memories? Is "forget and move on" always better for us? Or should we "hold on dearly to these memories".

Parents are always so concern about their children, but is it good to make decision for them, and tell them as-a-matter-of -fact "Mom knows what is the best for you!"

I am not criticizing anything here, but sometimes, i do believe, issue of the heart cannot be explained by logic. I always think that, it is better to blame ourself for doing the wrong things than to blame our parents in the future.

"Is it the end of the story? Or is it the beginning of a new story? Or maybe it is just merely a hit on the pause button."

POST #2
yep, went for NTU hall 2's production, The Store of Memorabilia, at Jubilee Hall today. why was i there? to support the soundman KQ and the stage manager ZM, who are both from hall 2.

Cutting it short, its a story abt a mother, daughter and son. daughter is attached to sissy-gay guy for 4 yrs but doesnt wanna get married (and of coz mom keeps pushing her), son is unattached and doesnt really wanna cos mom wants him to concentrate on studies, until he meets his crush (whom he broke up 4 yrs ago).
on the whole, it was rather entertaining la. at the start it was still quite drab until the sissy-gay boyfriend comes in and dialogues with the daughter. kao. freakingly gay haha...and the girl acting the mother also pretty good, very auntie like hahahah, makes me think of 2 girls. make a guess??

"Matters of the heart cannot be reasoned by logic"
"The simpler the thinking, the more complicated the execution"

haha weird sense eh. like my fren always say: "aiyah you always so rational. sometimes you must go and take a risk la, go with your feelings" but i guess its hard lah. raised on rationality. oops its become a habit, which is bad?

the 2nd line sounds more like whats happening to all my tutorial questions and exam questions. ever found questions which are based on really simple concepts (at least concepts u've learnt before) but then always twisted beyond recognition? yeah thats the 2nd line at work. maybe simple thinking isnt really that simple after all. lol.

I'm kinda happy with entries like these, that means like besides ppl enjoying the play, it sets them thinking about things I wrote. I'm happy, 'cause that is what doing theatre is all about. :)

~//~

Shall end this entry with the epilogue scene I wrote for "The Store of Memorabilia":

At the end of a journey,
at the end of a relationship,
when you find yourself wanting to say goodbye,
what do you really want to say?

What do you do with all the letters?
What do you do with all the love given?
Do you throw them away or hold on to them?
Or are you feeling lost with so much you’ve taken?

Is it really the end of a story,
or is it the beginning of another one?
Is it merely just hitting the pause button
to settle problems and get things done?

I guess it’s normal to be sad,
it’s always okay to cry,
but just let yourself be drowned in tears
just for that one night.

It may take a lot of courage;
it may just be a lot of pride.
But what is it you’re thinking
when it’s time to say goodbye?

*awake-at-7am-with-tan-sk-and-loy-mj-most-prob-now-on-their-way-to-work*,
Ah Yong

Er... Mm... My VisualDNA... Nothin' Important Tho...

2007-05-02T05:34:00.000+08:00

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

Do You E-mail For A Living?

2007-04-30T18:04:00.000+08:00

(taken from 8DAYS. written by Kenneth Kway.)

Can't resist looking at your phone, inbox or MSN beeper? That means you're addicted too. One way or other, we're all victims.

"In the '80s, the condition was known as Nintendoitis, and those who suffered from it were kids who loved playing hours of Super Mario Brothers. Today, it is the affliction of adults who own phones with tiny QWERTY keypads. It's called "Blackberry thumb", a painful result of too much typing on tiny keypads. The way tiny keypads are appearing, it's only a matter of time before Singapore spas start offering Fusion-Shiatsu Thumb Massage Therapy.

Which begs the question: why are we so addicted to data? Why do we feel the urge to reply to every SMS, every e-mail, every MSN beep almost immediately? Regardless of industry, our primary occupation seems to be clearing e-mail. The next time someone asks you what you do, just say "I clear e-mail for a living." So, is being connected as good as it sounds?

One friend working in an MNC told me how her company was issuing Blackberries to every employee who wanted one. She resisted at first but eventually caved. Now she's clearing her e-mail while standing in line for nasi lemak and liking it. "It helps me fill downtime with useful work I have to do anyway."

Sure, but when you have some scheduled quality "downtime" away from work, are you able to resist that pulsating inbox icon? What's to stop you from thumbing out some amendment to a meeting agenda and delegating the building of the weekend barbecue fire to you wife? Surely, that can only invite trouble. ("Honey, why are my chicken wings burnt? And they look like they've been dragged through the sand!")

Ah, the tyranny of the urgent: We forget that urgent things are not necessarily important and even important stuff is not always urgent. If you're bending over backwards to keep a clear inbox at all times, consider yourself a victim. I know I am.

Go out there and get a life. Turn off your mobile e-mail when it makes sense. And if you can bear that familiar ache shooting up your right arm, pat your dog a bit more.
"

NOTE FROM YONG:
1. When has it been morally correct to contact someone after 11pm just to see if he or she is free for tea or a movie 1 week later?

2. Shouldn't calls from work anytime after working hours considered overtime?

3. Why should emails and sms-es be called OFFICIAL ANNOUNCEMENTS when you have no control over whether the message arrives at the destination?

4. How can I distinguish, halfway through an important meeting, between a phone call that tells me if i'm free for chit-chat (10 missed calls) and a phone call that tells me my mom is in hospital (9 missed calls)?

5. Who the hell started saying that not replying to "hey are you free for a drink later?" is fucking considered "pang seh"?

And the list goes on...

*you-know-who-you-are*,
Ah Yong

A CNY Reflection

2007-02-21T04:49:00.000+08:00

First off... Happy Lunar New Year!

Oh wells, you may know that I really enjoyed staying at home, trying to empty my house of CNY snacks and stuff by eating them since my mum wun eat them + my dad can't eat them + my sis will not be around to eat them. so yar. one container full of bak gwa was half empty just now as i stepped out of house to come back to hall. it took me three days and A LOT of self-control not to finish ALL of it.

so, yes, peeps, ah yong here is already quite bored of all the CNY stuff. bring me back to my small little kid days when i still get to feel CNY's spirit with the whole school singing CNY songs and watching other kids performing stupid skids abt the monster "nian"!

the things i've done for the past few days:
1) sleep
2) watch "Protege" with mum and dad at vivo
3) eat
4) watch a china drama serial about the greatest businessmen in china's history: Qiao Zhiyong (which is interestingly very nice)
5) downloaded bleach manga to read
6) tried to fix the wireless at home
7) gave up and just surfed via ethernet cable
8) composed/arranged a couple of music themes for Kai's FYP
9) sleep somemore
10) wandered around bp
11) tried to get tired
12) tried to sleep somemore

yar... i'm quite brain-dead. i feel i havent really recover from the lack of creative juice. i feel damn sorry to kai's fyp group.

oh, and i went to chrong's house, *half* for CNY visiting tho, altho the most i did there was eat his CNY goodies (like there isn't enough in my own house... but hey, he has more varieties...)

i feel old. i know i am old, but feeling old is bad. i feel like i've drained of all the festive spirits (like x'mas, cny... y dun i feel EXCITED anymore?!) i dun feel like i'm looking forward to something.

but lanzi and jing are correct, i shd try to find my 'megan' soon, ANOTHER 'megan' tho. i need to learn to let go... but... haiz.

i was approached for an interview for a radio station (shant say which one... cuz i was proud of what i said). i was surprised when the deejay asked me "so any plans for a girlfriend?" oh shucks, i was like *ARGH* must i answer this question for the public to know? i was like "err... mmm... well... let fate decide?" shit, i hate cliche-ness... and i have to use it to cork up the question...

someone (i'm not trying to hide his identity, but i really seriously forgot) told me about my personality before. he asked if i'm the type who doesn't get into a relationship easily. yes, i answered. and he asked if the reason was because i ponder a lot about whether the relationship will last, and she has to be the perfect one. i was quite shocked to hear that actually. i was like "how can u tell?" he said, "from how many relationships you had and how long ago that was." woah. amazing.

actually my thoughts about the special 'her': it used to be 'i dun wan to burden her.' i dun wan my commitments to obstruct our relationship, i always said 'wait for the right time', but i discovered there will NEVER be a right time for me. knowing me, i will NEVER be available. time-wise. and i know, deep down inside, the stronger reason for me not to get into a relationship is really 'i dun wan to be burdened by her. i dun wan someone breathing down my neck about 'why are u so selfish in spending time with your work only?'"

no reply to a few unimportant sms, or no callback for one missed call, or no 'hi' on msn from me, and ppl already think i'm regarding them less as a friend. this is EXACTLY why i dun wan to sign up for big roles. but u know what, ppl always say 'hey go ahead, go ahead, u shd, u shd, we'll ALL understand, u hav our support'... and then at the end of the day, i receive shit like 'why r u so busy? really cannot meh? heck the work la. dun bother la.' hey, 'dun bother' is my call ok. if i really can 'dun bother' i will, but dun ask me to 'dun bother' if u cannot hold the responsibility of things happening AFTER i 'dun bother'.

if i get shit like that from frens, i tink i will get more shit from a GIRLfren...

i dun noe... maybe i'm just being slightly sexist... i dun wan to defend myself. and i dun wan to hear cliche stuff like "there are always somebody special" "there are always exception"... trust me, EVERY SINGLE LINE that you will tell me, i've told myself before, or i heard somewhere. so dun say them to me. u know it's like someone fall out of the relationship and u tell that someone "there's always somebody special out there"... if i were that someone, and if i was really feeling damn shitty, i'll throw my shoe at you, but most of the time i'll reply "hey thanks for the advice" full stop. ok, move on boy! i've past that. who DOESN'T know cliche stuff like that at our age. tell me something relevant to me.

i dun wan someone who wans to make me happy when i'm not. i dun need someone who tries to understand me when he/she doesn't. i need someone who makes me cry, who makes me angry, who let me empty my brain of all the sorrow or anger... u may think it's theoretical, but i survived the worst times in my life by having friends who emptied my brain by making me tear. my 'o' level results, my career failure before skyblue, my grandma... godsis, army bunkmate, uni fren... these three frens were my best frens and they will forever continue to be, no matter how little interaction i may have with them nowadays.

i dun know what i wan out of this entry. it's 5:21 and i'm supposed to be sleeping. but i can't. and i dun noe why.

perhaps i'm just wishing for a special someone i cud send an sms to to say goodnight.

Ah Yong

Rootless Tree

2007-02-12T15:38:00.000+08:00

ROOTLESS TREE
by Damien Rice

What I want from you is empty your head.
But they say be true, don't stain your bed.
And we do what we need to be free.
And it leans on me like a rootless tree.

What I want from us is empty our minds.
But we fake, we fuss, and fracture the times.
We go blind when we needed to see.
And this leans on me, like a rootless...

FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU
and all we've been through.
I said leave it, leave it, leave it,
it's nothing to you.
And if you hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me so good
that you just let me out
let me out, let me out?
Its hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out.
Hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out.

What I want from this
is learn to let go.
No, not of you
of all that is old
Killers re-invent and believe
and this leans on me, like a rootless...

FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU
and all we've been through.
I said leave it, leave it, leave it,
it's nothing to you.
And if you hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me so good
that you just let me out
let me out, let me out?
Its hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out.
Its hell when you're around.

Let me out, let me out, let me out
hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out
hell when you're around.

Let me out, let me out, let me out, let me out.
Let me out, let me out, let me out, let me out.
LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT.
LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT!!!

FUCK YOU, FUCK YOU, LOVE YOU
and all you've been through.
I said leave it, leave it, leave it
it's nothing to you.
And if you hate me, hate me, hate me, hate me so good
that you just let me out
let me out, let me out, let me out, let me out?

LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT.
LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT.
LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT, LET ME OUT!!!

Let me out, let me out, let me out
hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out
hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out
hell when you're around.
Let me out, let me out, let me out
hell when you're around...

~//~

我想讓一切歸零，讓一切從新開始，但不可能的，時間不能倒留。
我有一個辦法，但我知道這樣做很傻。
惟一讓我繼續下去的，是單純的希望。

希望著未來會更好，希望著未來會讓我走出這黑暗…
我現在走出了‘O’水准候的惡夢，走出當兵時的迷罔，還有什麼走不出的呢？
好想喊一聲FUCK YOU，讓時間屈服於自己。很傻吧？

等不到的病好，睡不著的午覺，想不完的煩惱。這不是我當初答應要面對的。
我以前解壓的方式，現在不是沒時間、沒精神，就是不再有效。

無根的樹，不只是首情歌。你，不再是一個人。而我，變得想歌裡一樣無奈、無助…
我失去了根，失去了作人基本的快樂，而死撐著，只希望半年後的自己仍活著…
到那時候，再找快樂吧…
到那時候，在回頭望，然後一笑而過吧…
這不是我們每個人都在彼此安慰的客套話嗎？

我不要再作Johnson，我要作回正勇。
我要作回那個可以花一整天的時間，無憂無慮地作在路邊觀人寫詞的正勇。
我要let myself out…

2007-01-30T08:51:00.000+08:00

I don't know what I'm thinking now...

I'm just pushing myself forward by all the forces around me, and I'm not able to take a breather, and this has been so for the past 1 month I guess.

I really thought the new year was quite a copable one, but I realized through time that I was wrong. Sure, I'm only taking five mods, and I have free slots most of the time, but the free slots are never free... I never found myself at home at these free slots, I never found myself going to a shopping mall, I never found myself doing most of my favourite hobbies: watching movies, swimming, slacking at home... no, never. my last movie was really Casino Royale last november, and that was because i was so stressed up with exams that I had to take that 4 hour break to go buy tickets and catch a movie (4 hour because of the waiting and travelling as well).

I'm already starting to long for the holidays that I'm planning for in April. Yes, I guess it has become an annual thingy, to runaway to somewhere and get myself uncontactable. I really need it.

I don't like this feeling that I'm having now. Not talking about the nauseaness and the frequent headaches, but about doing creative things on a routinal basis. This felt so wrong. Creativity to me is something spontaneous, not something that I should be able to come up with by just the snap of the fingers. Yet, I'm forced to do it. I felt like I'm trained to *snap* and *wah-la* an idea or something comes up.

Be it music, be it script, be it radio jingle ideas, be it just trying to solve a particular prob.

I feel tired of TRYING to be creative. Yes, trying.

I'm reconsidering my future. 'cos I really don't know if I'm up to it. Am I really that creative?

But, knowing myself, I just know I'm rambling because I hate routines. I totally hate them. I hate doing things for a logical and practical reasons. I hate doing things for others and not myself, especially after these few years of army and uni life. I do for others, but who do for me. No one. Yet.

Then again, maybe I should find myself someone to attach, so I can take. But that's so for a practical reason too, right? Love, should never be for practical reasons. Oh yar, forgot to mention that I really don't think people in the same company with different ranks/positions should be together. They'll never work out.

I havent really slept satisfyingly for a few weeks liao. I want to. I never get to. What's the difference between weekdays and weekends? I can't tell already.

Ah Yong

Upcoming: The Store of Memorabilia

2007-01-21T01:29:00.000+08:00

Sorry for the lack of updates! But not sure if anyone of u all are still frequent visitors to this site anyway...

Recently has been busy trying to get back into studying mode, and also juggling between CI Club matters, radio prac matters and most importantly, hall prod matters.

Most importantly? ya, it's sort of on the top of my priority list, but am still trying to juggle la, not like if there's something impt from other areas and yet i still ignore. But hall prod is finishing soon, so i shall put in all my best effort and energy liao for it lor.

And yup, it's finishing, and yup, I'm starting to sell tickets for MY hall production. 'My'? Yup, I scripted, composed music for and directed this year's hall 2 verve productions. it's like my baby la. so i'm kinda want to hear comments about it. It's my first full-length script (i've been directing other people's scripts before this), so come and watch kay?

Details?

Hall 2 Verve Productions
presents

THE STORE OF MEMORABILIA

3rd February 2007
7:30pm
Raffles Hotel, Jubilee Hall

Tickets @ $15
(Discount given to OCBC Debit Card holders)
Please contact ME @ 91788275 to buy tickets!

SYNOPSES
“What do you do with all your memories?
What do you do with all the love given?
Do you throw them away or hold on to them?
Or are you feeling lost with so much you’ve taken?”

“The Store of Memorabilia” tells the tale of a family of three: Mrs Yee is the mother who holds on to memories of her husband who disappeared; Susan is the daughter who keeps saying ‘forget it, never mind’; Desmond is the son who is just confused and always tries to avoid facing memories of his ex-girlfriend.

Every one of us has memories, but how many of us actually cherish them? Some of us just want to forget things and move on, seeking “newer and better things” in life. For some, they hold on dearly to these memories, not wanting to let them go. So, how should we deal with the memories we’ve accumulated over all these years? Is there a right or wrong answer?

Singapore has comprised on history in pursuit of a shiny metropolis, a “garden city” for Singaporeans as well as foreigners. Old buildings become victims of the value of the land they sit on, especially so here where land is scarce. Have we, as Singaporeans, also ‘comprised’ and took granted what we have, just to be in a race for the newer and better things? Yet, is this whole idea of ‘newer and better things’ just a nebulous and unrealistic one?

After last year’s successful production of Michael Chiang’s “Mixed Signals”, Verve Productions top in up this year with an original script filled with more fun, more laughs, and more heart-warming moments.

With a story about love and family, Verve Productions 06/07 invites you on this journey to explore the meaning of memories and what they mean to us.

TRIVIA

The main idea for the play came from an episode of the anime “Ghost in the Shell: Stand Alone Complex: 2nd Gig”. The title “The Store of Memorabilia” is a translation of the name of the store “牢記の店” that appeared in this episode of the anime. There are also many other references to this particular episode.
The Chinese opera scenes were initially not included during the pre-production stage. It was later added after the idea was suggested by the co-producers.
The G-string belongs to a member of the production team and not specially bought for the production.
The violin is really being played live by the performer and not recorded.
The song used in the scene where Mdm Cheng tells the story of the cranes is “心愛的再會啦” (Sim Ai Eh, Jai Huay La). It was written and first performed by the Taiwanese singer Wu Bai, and then the local famous accapella group Budak Pantai did their own rendition of the song and mixed it with Sarah Brightman’s famous “Time to Say Goodbye”. The scene was specially written because of the song.
The song Desmond searches for, “瀟灑走一回”, was chosen because it really was the playwright’s first Chinese pop song.
The story of the lantern is inspired by local writer Tan Hwee Hwee’s “Mid-Autumn”.

DIRECTORS' WORDS
The idea for “The Store of Memorabilia” had been with me for quite some time, even before we finished staging last year’s production of Michael Chiang’s “Mixed Signals”. I courageously volunteered to pen the script when I heard the production team for this year is looking for an original script, not knowing that I would be taking a step onto a journey that will be one of the most memorable one. It was really an experience, to write our own script, to compose our own music, and to stage it ourselves.

This play is actually very personal. Many parts of the play were derived from my own personal stories that had happened, while the rest were adapted from my own favourite stories. So which are factual? Which are fictional? I invite you to find out for yourselves.

I’m really happy and honoured to, once again, be given this chance of directing another play for the Verve Productions. And I must really thank the following people for helping me make this script come alive on the stage: my producer and co-producers for always being there when I need them, my co-director for sharing my workload when I had other commitments to fulfill, my very very hard-working stage managers for putting up with the many demanding requests I have, the props & sets crew for all the effort and hard work, the lights & sounds crew for being so patient and dutiful, the costumes & make-up crew for putting extra attention into all the details, the cast for enduring through the countless rehearsals, all those who helped in all kinds of ways, and of course, you, the audience, for sharing this magical night with Verve Productions 06/07.

*please-come-and-watch-to-support*,
Ah Yong