Life's a journey

Unexplained.

2008-05-11T13:35:00.003-05:00

What happened?! What did I miss?!

I feel ambushed.

Calorie Count

2008-05-06T23:57:00.002-05:00

This is the first time that I've ever been responsible for feeding myself alone. From cravings to composing grocery lists, purchasing and preparing food, I am alone on this journey of sustenance and starvation.

I moved to my new place a little over a week ago, and left the all you can eat buffet of university residence. As I was carrying furniture into my bedroom my stomach was growling already. The only food I had was a club pack of coffee whitener and a can of beans. My first meal at my new place was pizza ordered from down the road. The following day I ate a meat burrito from 7-11 which is two blocks from my place. Danger, Will Robinson! Danger!

The initial startup for a pantry is an expensive process. I spent nearly $100 buying, what I thought, were bare minimums. Miracle whip, canned veggies, Parmesan cheese. And after all that, I opened the cupboard to find that, though it wasn't bare, it could not support even the most basic MEAL. Everything required assembly, and everything was missing complimentary parts. I had cheese and meat and bread, but no tomatoes or lettuce. I had spring peas and V8, but no potatoes or steak. I tried to live off bagels and creme cheese and began to get cravings for an unidentified food group. Things had to change.

I am now living in a symbiotic relationship with the neighbourhood. The Food Fare, a small grocery store, is a mere block away from me. I make several small trips there a week for fresh meat, fruit & vegetables, and the odd condiment or snack I NEED RIGHT NOW. Their prices are a little more than the big name chains, but their close convenience makes up for it. I will never have to defrost meat and I can purchase my fruits and veggies in small quantities to keep food from going bad. For non perishables like canned food and oatmeal I make an occasional trip to Wal Mart or Price Chopper.

Making larger purchases is nearly impossible when one relies on the bus, so I bought a granny cart. I am officially the lamest person I know.

The New Helm

2008-05-04T07:00:00.000-05:00

I nearly forgot to mention this. How could I?! I'm so proud! I constructed my own desk! It's my new helm upon which I'll tackle the second year of university. It's already cluttered. I need ornate boxes.

Dumpster Treasure

2008-05-02T15:42:00.002-05:00

I found my first article of dumpster furniture today. I got to keep it because my roommates are Mennonites who value simplicity of life, pacifism, nonresistance, and free stuff.

The move

2008-04-30T01:48:00.003-05:00

A friend will help you move, a good friend will help you move a body.

Of course, if you're in the business of moving bodies you're pretty screwed up and should seek professional help. Morticians and funeral directors excluded.

I studied for two weeks straight and finished my exams on a Saturday. Because of time constraints, I was forced to begin packing immediately after my final exam. I moved that afternoon to my new home in the heart of Corydon Village. Mike helped me by way of proving a minivan and muscle power. He also brought a little kid along who proved to be quite handy when it came to holding doors open and closing drawers shut with duct tape. You're such a good friend, I love you Mike. I honestly have no idea what I would have done without you.

So I've moved in to my new place. It's a basement room in a whole house shared by four other guys. They're all Mennonite. I'm a bisexual of British descent. We are getting along swimmingly.

My new room has basically no furniture in it. I am desperately in need of a dresser and a computer desk that has drawers or I'll never get anything unpacked. I am living out of duffel bags at the moment and it's driving me nuts.

But I must admit that overall, I'm quite content in my new home, and slowly recovering from the mental bruising from the past two weeks.

Going gray

2008-04-19T23:53:00.003-05:00

I found my first gray hair of my life today. I kind of think it's sexy! Click on the 'hair' link to see the ongoing saga of my hair and I. Now it's back to studying for me! I am looking forward to the summer and regular blogging to commence!

Stir Crazy

2008-04-19T16:13:00.001-05:00

Stir Crazy
Originally uploaded by Michael Tyas

I'm in the middle of studying for exams, naked.

And I'm going a little nuts.

Assembly

2008-04-14T20:15:00.001-05:00

Assembly
Originally uploaded by Michael Tyas

At work the other day I assembled this patio set for the enjoyment of my clients. I've never attempted such a feat and it wasn't very hard because I put my mind to it. Those are snow banks still melting in the background.

Febrile Hallucinations

2008-04-10T00:40:00.006-05:00

I've been battling bug lately. It manifested as a brutal fever which, I'm quite convinced, gave me febrile hallucinations. I've never had such an experience. I was sick in bed trying to sleep when this horrible dream began. I dreamed that I was in a bureaucratic vicious circle, and that I was in charge of 'fixing the phones and making sure the wheelchairs worked.' I would wake up often because of the fever and felt my blankets becoming more and more drenched in sweat. Too weak and chilled to get up for water or a pill, I shut my eyes and tried to slip back to sleep.

Phones. Wheelchairs. Wake up. Sweaty blankets. Repeat. It was exhausting. I felt as though I had been working hard, physically and mentally, when I should have been resting. This made me frustrated on top of everything else. My heart rate was 90 bpm, racing as though I was doing heavy physical labour.

In my dream I began to construct an elaborate structure out of phone cables and wheelchair parts. It looked like junkyard art and was extremely complex. If my brain was a computer, the amount of detail going into this fruitless activity would have maxed out my RAM. I climbed up atop the structure and lay upon it, and then woke up. I couldn't tell where I was. Was I still atop the junk pile? I spread my hands out over my mattress to convince myself that I was awake and only suffering a bad dream. A drip of sweat dropped off my earlobe.

I was suddenly overtaken with an urgency to get back into my dream to continue the futile work I was assigned to. Part of me knew that it was just a dream and that I was not accomplishing anything, but the other was OBSESSING about getting the job done. The line separating reality and fantasy was becoming blurred. I was slipping in and out of consciousness, becoming more and more frustrated in and out of the dream of the exhausting and repetitive nature of what was happening to me, while at the same time becoming more obsessed with completing the task.

I finally had enough at 5 AM. I said out loud 'this is not real.' The psychotic sense of urgency wouldn't go away, so I began to repeat 'no. no. no!' I eventually gathered enough courage to get out of bed and get some water. I wore my housecoat and winter jacket to brave the 20C (68F) temperatures that my body deemed were frigid. After this, the problem was over.

I washed all my linens today and it cost me $6.

Taking a moment

2008-04-03T01:41:00.004-05:00

Continuing the in theme of money (a theme I hold so dear that it has it's own label), this evening I sat down and gave a good and hard look at my finances. I made a preliminary budget for the summer and the next 4 years, and have come up with some conclusions.

I, based on my current income, cannot graduate without debt. Selah.
In order to graduate without debt at my current job, I'll either have to curtail my entertainment fund and cell phone plan, live on the streets, or work 50 hours a week. I could also get promoted, or move to a higher paying job over the $15/hr mark.
I never again want an entertainment fund of $20/week like I did for 6 months in Orangeville in 2006, despite the fact that if I did so I would be significantly closer to breaking out of debt. This is because people began to think that I was a seclusive drug-addict. I did not buy new clothes for nearly a year. I became a plain, boring, and bitter person.
I'm going to go back to my cash only lifestyle. This will help me to keep the tightest hold on cash flows.
My situation is not as bad as it was on this podcast on August 20, 2006, where no matter what I did I was sinking further and further into debt. Hallelujah!

powered by ODEO
I want to teach English in South Korea after I'm done school. This is kind of random but I happen to know a small group of people from Korea living in Winnipeg. Last night a native Korean told me that I was the best English teacher he has ever heard, and that he actually knew about me before I knew about him. I plan to capitalize on that and becoming a teaching sensation! I'll let you know how it goes.

The dough.

2008-03-31T12:32:00.003-05:00

Yesterday I worked for 14 hours and made over $200 (US/CAN). Then I did the happy dance.

I regret that I haven't been posting as regularly because a lot of cool stuff is going on in my life at the moment. However I'm all about ~~recovering~~ paying off debts this season. The stories will continue less frequently but with more quality ;)

Inverse variation

2008-03-27T16:40:00.001-05:00

Inverse variation
Originally uploaded by Michael Tyas

I've been studying all day long and listening to CBC Radio 3.

Gonna get MA-A-A-RIED!

2008-03-24T12:15:00.004-05:00

My brother is getting married in June, and I'm in the wedding party! I'm really excited because it's the first time I'll be involved in a wedding, asides from some wedding video stints. I won't be able to videoblog the wedding as I'll be busy looking pretty, so I need someone (or many) else to do the job. You interested?

Check out Jared and Amanda's wedding website! But be warned: it has music. That plays automatically. And the stop button is hard to find if you're a dork.

Unexpected Call

2008-03-22T17:11:00.005-05:00

I was minding my own business on the bus when I received a call from my old friend, Chris. He had called a week earlier and seemed in a rush, though he wanted to make quick plans to give me a call some time soon and when would I be available? I told him my general schedule and was looking forward to catching up with him. We hadn't talked in nearly a year.

Hey Michael, how are you doing?

Good....where are you calling from, I don't recognize this number.

Oh, I'm just calling from my friend's house. So, I was wondering something.

Oh yeah, what's up?

Do you want to hang out tonight?

..... SHUT....UP.......NOFREAKINGWAY! YOU'RE IN WINNIPEG!!!!!!!!!

At this point most on the bus thought that I was obnoxiously crazy, but I couldn't care less. Chris phoned me up last week and tricked me into giving him my schedule so he could surprise little old me! I took him to the Manitoba Legislative Building, the Old Spaghetti Factory at The Forks, and then we met up with my friend Milena and enjoyed a beer and some company at Cousins Deli.

I think I made him really jealous that he doesn't live in Winnipeg. And it serves him right!

Drink it up

2008-03-17T16:43:00.003-05:00

Jones Soda just sent me a photo release form to potentially use this photo. In 2005 I uploaded this funky photo I took of Jeremy to their website. Jones Soda puts fans photos on their bottles. They get sold in Starbucks and other swanky places. I'd really like it to happen, as opposed to not happen.

Click the photo and make the decision easier for them by voting!

One to one hundred

2008-03-17T16:02:00.000-05:00

This video amazes me. There were so many different types of people and landscapes and it was beautifully shot. The idea was simple yet spoke volumes. After the age of 65, I kept on thinking to myself "that's the age that people begin to die on the news." Each drum beat began to symbolize a final heartbeat.

What did you think about when you watched this video?

Undo the doo

2008-03-14T16:50:00.003-05:00

Lately, since I've been feeling more icky than usual, I felt the urge to cut it all off. My goal was a haircut that would take care of itself on days that I didn't want to: towel; tame; and go.

Do not let my boyish good looks fool you. I feel like shit today, and have gone onto antibiotics. I'm battling swollen tonsils, a respiratory infection, a sinus infection and an ear infection. This week I worked four shifts, and I just wrote three major tests in the past 2 days. One of them I refused to study for. Me sir finito.

This time last year

2008-03-12T23:29:00.004-05:00

I received an important letter in the mail that changed the course of my life. I couldn't wipe the smile off my face.

Roughin' it

2008-03-10T23:24:00.004-05:00

Rough times ahead. I have two midterms at the end of the week. I also accepted two overnight shifts at job I really like. I decided that to indulge the best of both worlds (high marks & money) I would have to start cramming early. I recognize that I'll have to cram even more to retain the information and this isn't nearly as efficient, but it's a sacrifice that I can live with.

I had an excellently productive day of studying from 1:30 to 11 PM, with a break for food and socialization. I also fit in a super study buddy session with Carolyn, who joined me on the second floor of Dafoe just mere meters from where I chucked last week. She kept me focused and in her wisdom supplied some comedic relief when I thought I couldn't go on any further. I provided the Ritz crackers. I did not throw up, even though she's really pretty.

And then I said...

2008-03-10T22:33:00.000-05:00

The meek should do unto others as others have done unto them. It will take everyone by surprise.

Dafoe Library: Retched Blessing

2008-03-06T22:16:00.006-06:00

I had a fairly productive study session yesterday in Dafoe Library, the largest library on the University of Manitoba campus. I typed up three sets of textbook notes complimenting three lecture units, approximately 4 hours of work. It was for my human geography course and the subject matter was invigorating: a bonus. There's nothing better than finishing work worth doing, I say.

As you may have read in posts previous, I have been feeling ill for the past week and a half. I began to feel a reprieve from the flu on Monday and thought that the worst of it was behind me. Lately, in my world, everything I thought was true has instead been re-labled "work in progress." The really important questions of life have been dogging me, and I need time to figure them out.

A quick taste, a preview if you will, of what I'm talking about: It became quickly apparent that I was wrong about overcoming my illness when I began vomiting, without expectation, on the second floor of Dafoe. I had coughed and tasted bile in the back of my throat, and with a precious three seconds before eruption had managed to perch over a tiny garbage pail. I remained in this state for five minutes, fielding looks from concerned (read "horrified) fellow peers who were probably not expecting this, either. No one tried to help me, much to my then thankfulness and now dismay. Thanks a lot, no-hearts!

After the 'event' I noticed a large pile of clean Starbucks napkins just sitting on an empty table one meter from where I blew it.

Seriously now. If you have to throw up unexpectedly in public, it can't get any better than having a garbage can at your feet and a pile of napkins just sitting there waiting for some night janitor to come throw them out.

And to add even more blessing to injury: After I managed to clean myself up sufficiently I called my friend, Milena, to tell her what happened. If anyone would understand, it would be her. She just happened to be on campus and wanted to see me to give me a hug. I freshened up in my dorm and we talked about the really important questions of life for two hours.

All things considered equal, this was one of the most retched blessings I have ever had.

I said it first

2008-03-05T17:36:00.000-06:00

"Humanity will rinse and repeat with some new product that promises essentially the same thing." - Michael Tyas

My friends are not licensed medical professionals

2008-03-03T20:20:00.003-06:00

Despite what my friends suggested, I don't have mono! Man, just saying that makes me feel a whole lot better. I went to see my family doctor today. He suspects that I have a variation of the flu that does not involve excessive respiratory inflammation. So the chills and headache and lack of appetite fit under the category of influenza as well.

He said I should feel better within a few days, and that lifts my spirits. Perhaps I won't flunk out of school after all.

Here's a funny video about me theorizing about how my humidifier could be making me sick, 3 days ago. While it probably wasn't the cause of my maladies, I'm glad I caught it!

I've got mono

2008-03-01T22:29:00.003-06:00

Self diagnosis, but consider the facts, from Medicinenet.com

One may be developing mono if they experience these symptoms:

* a general lack of energy or malaise,
* a loss of appetite, and
* chills.

I happen to be exhibiting all these symptoms simultaneously much to my displeasure and discomfort. But this rabbit hole becomes even darker.

These initial symptoms can last from one to three days before the more intense symptoms of the illness begin. The more common intense symptoms include:

* a severe sore throat,
* fever, and
* swollen glands (lymph nodes) in the neck area.

It is typically the severe sore throat that prompts people to contact their doctor.

This evidence, coupled with the fact that I've never had mono before and you can only get mono once, leads me to the conclusion that I want my mommy.

I may be out of commission in Web 2.0 for the next couple days (weeks). Be a doll and send me a get well comment, or come change my linens and give me a sponge bath. You can spoon feed me or read me stories. You can write my essays and compile my notes. You can take my tests and send me to Cuba on holidays after I'm better.

Old men followed by fevers

2008-02-28T14:22:00.006-06:00

I saw No Country For Old Men yesterday with Tim P. It was a really fantastic movie, though not one that I'd ever like to see again due to its graphic nature. There were moments in the movie where the emotion was so thick that I wanted to clamp down on Tim's thigh, just above the knee, and squeeze as hard as I could to relieve the tension.

This was followed by a gastronomical gastric attack from a free chocolate bar I had been offered. It is a low carb diet chocolate bar made with maltitol, a sugar alcohol that doesn't rot teeth. As I was munching on the bar and noting its unique flavor I thought I should look up maltitol as I had never heard of it before. I immediatly gravitated to an article titled "Malitol, just say NO" and it is there that my bathroom doom was prophesied over me. It apparently makes the bowels irate.

I had problems sleeping last night because a) I had just watched countless people be murdered on the silver screen and the images were dancing around my head and b) my bowels were vibrating. Then my neck started to hurt, followed by the chills which turned into a sweaty fever. My whole body began to ache and my lungs felt fatigued. I thought I was coming down with the flu. I prayed and asked the Lord to heal me, and made it easier on Him by downing three tylenol at once.

I woke up 92% my usual self this morning. Knock on wood, I think I have beat whatever is ailing me.

Update, 11:44 PM: I'm feeling soo ill and I'm getting the shakes again. Time for another Tylenol cocktail.