Woolly Ramblings

2007-09-11T23:13:00.000Z

This post is part of the Group Writing Project at Seduction Central http://jeffreykishner.com/astrology/love/

ASTROLOGICAL SUN SIGN DATING GUIDE.

(Tongue Firmly in Cheek!)

Some lighthearted, some bitter experience. You guess which is which :)

I can't claim to have dated men from all astrological signs but I have been close enough to most through friendship and work to be able to hazard a guess as to what a relationship with them might be like.

Aries (Mr Me First, Me First!)

The first sign of the zodiac. The archetypal boy-child. Selfish, yes, but in a childlike way. Why take one sweetie when you can dip your sticky little mitts in the whole jar.... Highly flammable. Not great husband material unless you hardly ever want to see him, he will spend all weekend involved in one risky, pointless and dangerous activity after another and expect YOU to wash and iron his parachute.

Taurus (Mr Fur Coat no Knickers)

Lover of luxury, likes to live well, even if he has to plunder the food money, rent money, your purse to do it. Sign most likely to be a con-man or thief to live the lifestyle they are convinced they are entitled to. Bed good, if you like being ordered about that is and you have a LOT of stamina. If you want to attract Mr Taurus then dress rich and hang around where the rich people go. Appearances matter very much to Mr Taurus, never look crumpled, untidy or dishevelled. His ideal date would be a cross between Grace Kelly and Audrey Hepburn and be rich, rich, rich.

Gemini (Mr. Oh, that was last week. I HATE it now...let me tell you about the time......)

The communicator of the zodiac, talks the hind legs off a donkey. Often calls himself a writer. Like Gump's chocolate box, you never know what you are going to get. Split personality doesn't even cover it. Mercurial they say and we all know that playing with mercury sends you crazy in the end.

Cancer (Mr. Do you still LOVE me?)

Despite a reputation for being cautious, Mr Cancer dwells in the realm of emotions, these are easily aroused. Moody, sulky. Can be a real pain unless loved 100%, 100% of the time Whinger. Cries at touching advertisements for missing kittens but can have a cruel streak. His mum loves her little soldier though, bless.

Leo (Mr Look at ME)

Has to be the centre of attention. Tiring to date, constant admiration is required, ego stroking after sex a complete must. Sunglasses usually required to shield your eyes from their sense of 'style', which, like them, is often very LOUD.

Virgo (Mr. How do I love thee? Let me count the ways, but we should shower first)

Shower before bed, shower during bed, shower after bed. Rips off his clothes (neatly and carefully), then folds them up. Thanks you politely afterwards then gets up to shower and play with his spreadsheets.

Libra (Mr Mirror Mirror on the Wall)

He loves himself so much there isn't much room for anyone else in his mirror. If you do date one then be prepared, he will spend more time plucking his eyebrows and buffing his nails than making love. When he does make love there will be a strategically placed mirror so he can see how wonderful he looks from all angles. Most likely to be spotted posing at the gym, doesn't actually DO anything at the gym, might get sweaty and ruin his hair or get his gym kit rumpled.....

Scorpio (Mr Strong, Silent Type)

Magnetic personality. Distinctive eyes. Will spend whole evenings trying to weasel information out of you but will not spill one iota in return. Make great detectives. Fearful temper. Never forgets a hurt and you will pay for it. Oh yes, you will pay – it might not be today, it might not be next week but he will get you and get you good. Supposed to be the sexiest sign but is it worth the effort? Oh, sorry, I forgot, only HE is allowed to ask the questions.....

Mr Sagittarius (Mr They call me the Wanderer)

A good friend, fun, carefree, always up for a laugh. Unfortunately the sign most likely to be a commitment-phobe. Tell him you love him, tell him that you are thinking how nice it would be to settle down and then eat his dust.......

Mr Capricorn (Mr. To be Honest)

Doesn't do subtle. Doesn't do tactful. Does do open, honest and straightforward. Do you REALLY want that complete honesty ALL the time?..(Does my bum look big in this?)

Mr Aquarius (Mr Strange)

He looks at you but his mind is ten zillion light years away, inventing, dreaming, soaring on flights of fancy. He may invent you some useful household gadgets. He may blow up your kitchen trying to make a rocket. Forgets to think about sex, if you remind him he will drift off halfway through the conversation and be inventing a gadget for it.....

Mr Pisces (Mr. So what if its the first date, I LOVE you)

Tender, dreamy, otherworldly. Likes to keep his options open, which is strange as he often declares love on the first date. Can get terribly disappointed in you if you don't live up to his image. Likes to serve his partner. Sign most likely to want to escape the harshness of real life through drink or drugs. Indecisive so may not be able to decide whether he wants drink or drugs, so will probably do both. Often. Indedcisive, impossible to pin down and will be late for his own funeral.

Happy :D

2007-09-11T22:49:00.001Z

New Year

2007-09-10T23:54:00.000Z

New school year that is. My youngest started her new college today, she is really excited and enthusiastic about it.

Tonight I was involved in her agonising decision 'what to wear'. Its her first year out of uniform and it matters, a lot. This girl has a room full of clothes but none of them go together (apparently), or make the right statement. I was subjected to a parade of different outfits. The one she chose was very, very, short shorts and a vest top.

Then a terrible thing happened.

I turned into my mother......

Me: 'Do you think that shorts are appropriate for college, Lu?'

Lu: 'Everyone is wearing them'

Me: 'you look like you are going to the beach'

Lu: (prancing about in front of mirror) 'do you think I look too..... leggy?

Me: 'Weeeeel, they are very short Lu'

Lu: 'I HAVE NOTHING TO WEAR!!!!' (please excuse caps but it was the only way to convey the DRAMA of that moment.)

Lu flounces (she does that so beautifully) upstairs to try something else. Then comes back downstairs in an even shorter skirt, then and even shorter pair of shorts, then a belt - er, sorry, skirt.

Me: (sensing defeat) 'well, if the other girls wear shorts then I suppose its ok, maybe with some opaque tights?'

Lu: 'Thats for the winter, its still summer.'

At that moment I realised that I had turned into my mother. I was horrified. I remembered the arguments I would have with my own mum about what I was wearing and remembered what was like to be 17 and realised that in the great scheme of things it didn't really matter if she wore shorts.

I turned to Lu and said 'You are young, you have a great figure and legs, you wear your shorts Lu.'

She then turned to me and said 'Oh, its ok. I have decided to wear something else'.

I have two years of this......

Off Again....

2007-09-06T19:04:00.000Z

Off for a swim, back Sunday :D

Hope you all have a great weekend.

Off to see what Jo is up to before I go, she has been quiet today.

Things...

2007-09-05T20:47:00.000Z

Just had a phone convo with Mr Pisces and I was musing about the amount of THINGS there are in shops. Now the shops are complaining we are not buying enough THINGS because of the high interest rates here and the economy is slowing.

The whole of the economy here is service and selling THINGS based it seems, we don't even make the THINGS anymore, they are shipped in from China, or wherever. There was even a panic last christmas because a giant super container ship full of THINGS from China was scuppered somewhere and Christmas itself was threatened. (I did remember wondering how parents would explain that news item to the juniors watching the six o'clock news - yes son, Santa's elves are in China, thats where they make the THINGS for santa, no, son, I know they don't LOOK Chinese in the picture books and films....... ).

We have the season of shopping coming up fast but as I have the time and I think that they show love and thought I am making most of my presents this year. I can't say what they are because some of the recipients may tune in.

Those that know me will know that I rarely buy anything new if I can help it. I use freecycle, ebay, charity shops, car boot sales etc., for most of the THINGS i need (want if I am honest, most of the THINGS I couldn't truthfully say I need). If everyone were like me then the whole economy would crash, no jobs, no shops (except M&S - they will never die, not many people like second hand drawers - except I did hear about some strange men and a dodgy e-bay auction ... er, think I will get off this train of thought at the next station).

So, I suppose all the shoppers out there are helping the nation by their frantic purchase of their loved-ones' gifts and such 'vital' items as olive de-stoners, fifteen foot inflatable santas, disposable toilet cleaning pads, plug in air-fresheners, sink tidies, special christmas toilet paper, etc., not to mention the amount of food that is thrown away over the Christmas period which, according to a survey I read, averages £60 per household (not mine, I make soup out of it if it stands still long enough :D )

I should be ashamed of myself, its people like me who let the country down.

I am going to buy a THING tommorrow, just to do my bit for the economy. Think its got to be the fifteen foot inflatable Chinese Santa......

What a crazy world : D

Can't believe it....

2007-09-04T13:37:00.000Z

Its been so long.

Not much has happened. Been spending a fair amount of time with Mr Pisces. He is so busy at work though, not much time for splashing in the rockpools with his crabbess :(

My daughter made the front page of the local newspaper after having achieved a whole bunch of A* results for her exams. Proud mum moment.....

Finally finished all the form filling for my degree course and have been told I can get funding and am all set to start, pencil sharpened. Better get new specs, just broke the arm off my last pair and am finally forced to admit I can't read without them.

Went to the National Portrait Gallery with both daughters, had a lovely time there and we went for lunch to cafe Italia just off leicester square then they dragged me around covent garden for an hour or two. Have told them I will go to London but only to galleries/museums, NO SHOPPING - so they sneaked it in at the end when I was too tired to object (much). Load of expensive tourist tat, including pet stones and names made from wire (Why?)

Just off to roast a squash for dinner, lu wants squash soup and cornbread. Scraped together my last couple of quid to buy the ingredients. That day out in london left me skinter than a skint thing.

Off to catch up with JellyJo's blog, see what the dear gel has been up too.

If any of my regs are still checking in then big hugs to you, if not then I understand entirely.

Love to them that needs it. j xxx

Limegreenjelly

2007-08-17T08:25:00.000Z

There are some truly wonderful people in this world, ready to help others for no payback other than the joy of sharing their knowledge and enthusiasm. I was lucky enough to spend the day in the company of one such person, Jo. She drove hours to see me, fixed up my spinning wheel and got me going. Not only that, but she had the patience of a saint, coped with my ADD admirably and the only complaint I have is that she didn't touch the chocolate cake I had so I have had to eat it all myself.

Thanks Jo, you really are a star. I had a great time with you and learned lots.

Love jackie x

Writing...

2007-08-09T23:00:00.000Z

Was intrigued by a post made as a reply to a blog comment I made (still with me? Good stuff!). Its an astrology site (the aforementioned Seduction Central - at my age I need all the help I can get). Apparently I should try to write fiction as I have some likely planets. (No, Jo, nothing to do with uranus before you say it...)

Easy, thats it , I shall write.

Now, all I need is an idea.

I will ask my three regular readers to give me suggestions for a story theme.

Nan
Jo
Scotland

C'mon, I will dedicate my first best-seller to the winner.

I truly cannot wait....

love j x

Other Fish to Fry :-)

2007-08-08T15:08:00.000Z

Oh well, might as well spill..

On 7th of 7th I said yes to a date with a piscean man who tried (quite a few times, actually) to get me to dip my toe into his particular pond. What made me change my mind, oh, it must have been the planets were right or something.

Have been spending a lot of time at his, an ancient tumbledowny cottage with no phone or internet connection. So thats where I have been hiding :-)

All going swimmingly at the moment.

Jelly Green Jo is coming to our watery lair next week, can't wait. We are getting our wheels out. Hope its sunny we can sit in the garden and spin a yarn :-)

Just joined an astrology site. Not great at buttony things but its called 'seduction central' and its great, have a look if you are into that sort of thing.

Am going to be around until Friday, when I am going fishing again :D

Love to them that needs it, Jackie x

Creeps sheepishly back into the room.....

2007-08-01T15:48:00.000Z

Hello

Thanks to all of you who sent messages of concern/support etc during my recent break.

There are a few reasons I haven't been around, internet access problems one of them.

will try to write more regularly.

Hugs to all my friends, wherever you are, and I am sorry I have neglected you all lately. Been wrapped up in my own little world :D

Love j x

Back to school...

2007-07-07T08:37:00.000Z

Decided the time is right, now parental duties are easing, to finish the Arts and Humanities degree i started a few years ago. i enjoyed studying then but it was difficult to fit it in. Really looking forward to it, the subject matter is so interesting. Alone for a week now, should get out the reading list and make the most of some free time.

I woke up this morning at 7, then realised that at 7 minutes past seven it would be 7.07 on 07.07.07. Perhaps I should buy a lottery ticket, all those sevens have just got to bring a lucky day!

I got Surged!

2007-07-05T08:21:00.000Z

Lost my pc to a violent storm, it was close to drawing a pension anyway, so splurged out on a new lappy or is it a notebook, whats the difference?

Decided to go wireless as it means i can write somewhere quiet instead of having to sit in the family room at the desk while the girls have the TV on and I can sit in the garden in the sunshine, although there hasn;t been much of that lately...

My typing is abysmal on here, so used to a full-sized keyboard, so sorry about that...

Not much today as I am finding this hard work :-) I am sure I will get used to it soon.

Made friends with half india , phoning the belkin call centre, missed the net so much I was up half the night figuring it out. Honestly spoke to at least a dozen of them with no luck until I chanced upon a cheery young guy calling himself 'Stuart'. So thanks 'Stuart' for your help. Why do the companies feel the need to anglicise their workers' names, I would find it a bit insulting, or do they joke about it amongst themselves? Do they get to pick their own names or just get a random one assigned.

Strange business altogether.

Its good to be back xxx

Stuart was happy Iwas happy, he put me onto his supervisor so I could tell him too. I was glad to do that, hope he gets promoted, cheers Stuart :-)

Pondering....

2007-07-02T12:56:00.000Z

Pondering that challenging experiences in life can make us either bitter or philosophers and how suffering can make you less likely to get upset over the small stuff and moan about nothing much.

Some say that happiness is within us always and nothing can take it away. I don't know about that, its a nice theory but....

Read a quote today 'worry is like a rocking chair it gets you nowhere but the ride keeps you occupied', something like that.

So, I am not going to worry, it will get me nowhere and the ride is not the sort of occupation that is useful.

That is all, my rice and lentils are ready, I am lucky, at least I get to eat and drink. One in six people in the world go hungry.

V&A and Spinning Wheel...

2007-06-30T20:04:00.000Z

Had the best birthday for a long time! The day out with my daughter was really special. Now they are almost grown there hardly seems a day when they are not doing something or going somewhere so I really enjoyed spending time with my youngest.

We walked our legs off and still didn't see everything. Had a few laughs at some of the fashions, especially when I pointed to things and said 'oh, I had an outfit like that in the eighties'. It was touching to see some of the very old dresses, particularly the bridal gowns and it struck me how TINY they were. We were amazed at the waist sizes and thought that we would need a very strong corset to get anywhere near that size.

The paintings were our favourites though, some cartoons by Raphael were awe inspiring but the best ones to us were a collection bequeathed to the V&A by a gentleman called 'Mr Sheepshanks' . I like the way the V&A is organised chaos, things are not grouped chronologically but in rooms called things like 'China' and 'Asia', this is a bit confusing until you just go with the flow and just enjoy the beautiful and interesting objects.

We had plenty of stops for drinks, as it was the one dry and warm day this week, particularly enjoyed our lunch in a little cafe near the V&A called 'Greenfields' and a quick coffee stop we had in the garden within the V&A itself, there is a shallow pool surrounded by lemon trees.

A wonderful day and we decided to go out together a bit more often. National Portrait Gallery next....

My spinning wheel arrived today, haven't had much of a chance to have a look at it yet though.

Well, thats all from me for tonight, have to go and feed the dogs, they are saddened by all this rain, they are not keen on it. Neither am I to be honest. I can't remember such a rainy June.

Back...

2007-06-27T13:52:00.000Z

Hi and thanks to those who sent messages or posted.

You haven't missed much. Most interesting things that have happened are my 'ring ring' phone has arrived. The most surprising thing about it is the weight of it, I had forgotten how heavy those old phones are. Phoned myself a few times from my mobile to hear it 'ring ring', I expect the novelty will wear off.

Other piece of news is that I have found a 'new' spinning wheel. Its old but never been assembled, so that's going to be a challenge. I am collecting it from a lady who is meeting me in Guildford on Friday, have to lurk about a certain bench at a certain time. Imagination getting the better of me and imagining if I went to the wrong bench and got tangled up in an international smuggling thingy. Yikes, better look in the box before I set off for home. I did ask how I would recognise her, as I said it I realised it was a stupid question, unless there is more than one person going to turn up with spinning wheels for an assignation, then it could get tricky. Oh, its an Ashford traveller for those who would like to know...

Off to the V&A tomorrow, really looking forward to it. Its my birthday and I am going with my youngest. She is dying to see the fashion, I want to see the textiles and we both like the oriental stuff. Lots more there and I am sure I shall have something to tell you about it on Friday. Not looking forward to the journey, its only about 2 hours door to door but I wonder how I ever managed to do it day in and day out when I worked there.

Just fighting my way through the washing up. Didn't do it yesterday so its my own fault.

Nothing else to report so will sign off.

Oh, just one more thing - happy birthday to Scotland, we share the same birthday, isn't that great! (think he is older than me though :D ) Have a great day Scot xxxx

PS. Nan, thanks for posting, its good to see you x

Missing a Day

2007-06-22T21:53:00.000Z

Not been around much as not feeling too good at the moment. Back soon, I hope. x

'Another Night on The Tiles?'

2007-06-20T11:57:00.000Z

Another ACEO actually, did this one this morning. I am enjoying doing these but they are distracting!

ACEO PS

2007-06-19T20:47:00.000Z

The one with the three cats in is called 'Bad Fur Day'. Just thought I would mention that....

ACEO Cards

2007-06-19T20:36:00.000Z

Stands for: Art Cards, Editions and Originals. I painted these for my daughter:

They are 2" x 3 ", although officially they should be 2.5" x 3.5" Never mind they are only for fun.

Why

2007-06-18T21:49:00.000Z

Why do they sell nectarines that you could use for cricket balls and say eat within three days on the pack when they take a week to ripen.

Why do they write 'serving suggestion' on everything. Do they think you are simple and actually believe that the turkey, roast potatoes, vegetables and gravy boat full of steaming gravy are actually IN the packet of stuffing?

Why do they say cooking directions on back of label when they are stuck on with industrial strength super glue and when you peel them off you are left with the very top layer and have to read the left-behind instructions in a mirror.

Enquiring minds wish to know.

Thank you.

Just saw...

2007-06-18T19:18:00.000Z

Yes, I know I said I was going but this made me laugh.

A freecycle ad just came in. Apparently there is free 'hard core' at Reigate station. Brought to mind legions of the dirty mac brigade hotfooting it over to Reigate.

Well, I thought it was funny...

jx

Nobody

2007-06-18T19:12:00.000Z

Nobody ever comments on my serious posts. Have you noticed that? I wonder why.

Answers below please. First one to come up with something interesting or plausible wins a prize.

I'm waiting.............

Paying it Forward...

2007-06-18T17:29:00.000Z

There are some things I won't share with you dear Blogger, but I had my share of troubles and some small (and not so small) acts of kindness have brought happiness to me in some bleak times. Some of the kindness has come from virtual strangers, or virtual friends, whichever way you want to look at it.

I like the idea of RAOK (random acts of kindness) A flower given to a stranger, a cup of tea bought for someone who looks as though they need it, a mail to say 'how are you, thinking of you' they don't have to be big things to make a real impact on someone's day, life even.

I had the chance to pay it forward today and that is a good feeling too.

Your mission, should you choose to accept it is to carry out a RAOK. Make someone's day. (I was dying to write 'punk' after that a la Clint Eastwood, but that would have spoiled the whole thing, don't you think?)

Sunday Sunday......

2007-06-17T20:45:00.000Z

Started a bit too early for me. Dog woke me up. This meant I was tired all day, so gave in this afternoon and had an hour in bed with Oscar Wilde, which ended up with me falling asleep.

Sorry Oscar, you just weren't exciting enough to keep my attention.

Finally getting round to reading 'Girl With a Pearl Earring' about the life of Vermeer. I found it on e-bay for 99p. Looking forward to that. Somehow I think I won't fall asleep with Vermeer, if you know what I mean ;-)

Ring Ring....

2007-06-16T10:35:00.000Z

My phone is broken. It will dial out but doesn't ring. I saw one on Freecycle, a wonderful 70's cream coloured phone, with dial. Retro chic (as I like to think of it). Telling youngest daughter about it, she pipes up 'oh, you mean its got a dial like in the olden days'.

I am crushed.