The Polar Bear Diaries

Labiaplasty – cutting the wings off your vagina….

2009-11-14T20:19:00.001-08:00

I awoke Saturday morning with a king size hangover thanks to the attentions of the Japanese Nurse and the dancing Chinese (sadly not at the same time). Nookie will be pleased to note that I took neither home and I am still a 23 year old virgin.

Over coffee I opened the internet and spied the following:

http://m.abc.net.au/browse?page=11144&articleid=2741446&cat=Most%20POpular&title=Designer%20vagina%20craze%20worries%20doctors&type=&SID=a28c31d2b6ea0b58ad21e5ba5884acb0

It seems Genital Modification (as opposed to mutilation) is on the rise. Which brings a new meaning to GM, and its nothing to do with crops.

Apparently the most common modification is "Labioplasty" – God knows what that is, but apparently the reason is physical, in terms of running or jogging and not being able to wear a leotard or cossie.

What the Fuck do these women have down there???? I dated an Indonesian girl who had 747 wings for Labia. Really – if you stuck an engine up her ass she would double for a stealth bomber. Yet she could run, jog, wear a swimming costume or leotard. I have photos to prove it. Nothing seemed to hang out!!!

Incidentally she could have modelled for the wings in this article….

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Labiaplasty

But why do it? And cant you really wear a swimsuit? I mean – Katoeys and Bancis have a bloody great sausage in their Victorias Secrets, and half the punters are shocked to find it.

Berlin Wall as I saw it.

2009-11-10T01:53:00.001-08:00

The Wall came down 20 years ago yesterday.

I remember reading it in a lift in a KL hotel. Things would never be the same again.

Over coffee I remembered times good and bad.

Visiting a cousin serving with BAOR in Berlin, and being shown the wall, then, incredibly, going the other side of it in the S-Bahn. I remember a Russian Major saluting my cousin. Occupying powers, united in hate and respect.

The wall was big and scary. Fear ran over it 24 x 7.

Unbeknown to me, at that time David bowie and Iggy Pop were in Berlin, writing my all time favourite song, China Girl.

It seems like last week.

Did I fall asleep?

Husan the terrorist Part 2

2009-11-09T22:22:00.001-08:00

The story gets more and more curious.

Obama doesn't want to say anything, being a closet Muslim himself.

The FBI, having slipped up AGAIN by failing to report a religious viper in the bosom, are playing it all down. They are on record as saying they don't believe it was a terrorist attack.

They have also announced that an investigation last year into Husans contact with cleric Anwar al-Aulaqi assessed that the content of those communications was consistent with research being conducted by Major Hasan in his position as a psychiatrist. Which is utter bollocks. Google cleric Anwar al-Aulaqi and see what I mean. Three of the 911 terrorists were "advised" by Anwar al-Aulaqi, he is banned from the UK and has repeatedly and publicly announced his support of terrorism. Fuck me, what more do the FBI want?

Meanwhile the US press are reporting that Husan was hanging around strip clubs for the last few weeks. Why would a devout Muslim do that? Well, Islam teaches that a jihadi martyr is forgiven all sins at the first drop of his blood. So having made the committed decision to kill "Infidels" they can go off rooting anything in sight. Its not unusual - In the days before the 911 attacks, some of the hijackers drank alcohol, slept with prostitutes and frequented strip clubs. Thats another good reason to believe that says this was a planned terrorist attack.

Some of the reports from colleagues also portray Husan as a religious fanatic rather than a crazy gunman.

Anyway, he is awake and talking. The problem is he is talking ot the FBI and the Army, both of whom are under strict control from Obama.

Watch the spin on this…..

The simple truth is he was another Islamic terrorist hiding in the US armed forces. Sooner or later, either the army weeds them out, or the soldiers will do it themselves….

Here are a few other Islamic assholes:

NAVY SIGNALMAN HASSAN ABUJIHAAD last year was convicted of tipping off al-Qaida to battlegroup movements in the Persian Gulf, including disclosing classified documents detailing the group's vulnerability to terror attack

ARMY RESERVIST JEFFREY LEON BATTLE in 2003 pleaded guilty to conspiring to wage war against the U.S., confessing he enlisted "to receive military training to use against America"

ARMY RESERVIST SEMI OSMAN in 2002 was arrested for providing material support to al-Qaida and pleaded guilty to weapons charges after agreeing to testify against other terror suspects

MARINE ABDUL RAHEEM AL-ARSHAD ALI trained at a suspected al-Qaida camp and was charged with selling a semiautomatic handgun to Osman

ARMY SGT. ALI "THE AMERICAN" MOHAMED trained Green Berets at the elite Swick warfare school at Fort Bragg before stealing classified military secrets for al-Qaida and helping plan the 1998 U.S. embassy bombings in Africa

ARMY SGT. HAMMAD ABDUR-RAHEEM in 2004 was convicted of terror-related charges

ARMY SPC. RYAN G. ANDERSON in 2004 was convicted of leaking military intelligence to al-Qaida terrorists, including sensitive information about the vulnerabilities of armoured Humvees

ARMY SNIPER JOHN ALLEN MUHAMMAD was sentenced to death after fatally shooting 10 in the nation's capital a year after the 9/11 attacks

FORMER ARMY LINGUIST AHMED FATHY MEHALBA in 2005 was convicted of stealing secret documents listing, among other things, the names of al-Qaida detainees from Gitmo

SENIOR AIRMAN AHMAD AL-HALABI in 2004 was convicted of mishandling classified documents as an Arabic linguist at Gitanamo

ARMY CAPT. JAMES "YOUSEF" YEE in 2003 was formally charged with mishandling classified information – including maps of a new Gitanamo facility – as a Muslim chaplain at Gitanamo.

Lies lies and damn statistics (Shelly Lubben)

2009-11-08T18:38:00.001-08:00

Shelly Lubben is a former porn star with an axe to grind. She opens her Porn Industry Statistics with "66% of porn stars have Herpes, a non-curable disease". Which is pretty good, considering that findings published by the Robert Wood Johnson Medical School, Piscataway, N.J., show that the genital herpes rate is high in affluent suburban populations - about 1 in 3 for patients in their 40s.

So 66% of porn stars is….. yep, 1 in 3. The average for affluent suburban populations….

Shellys story is here:

http://shelleylubben.com/shelleys-story

Rugby union, Cigars, and wild nurses……

2009-11-08T05:23:00.001-08:00

I had another strange couple of nights in bars. Really I should give up drinking and take up something safer…

Friday night the Chinese Dancer came and stood next to me, catching me unawares with my arms around a Japanese Nurse that Taiki had just introduced me to. Things went from bad to worse. The nurse has a bit of a belly, and sensing jealousy, she stuck it out and said "Im having his baby". I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Taiki and the rest of the guys were rolling on the floor laughing. The Chinese Dancer stormed off, picked some poor sucker up on the dance floor and gave him mouth to mouth for the rest of the night.

Meanwhile up came Echila the Thai silicon-tit specialist (see last weeks rant). She was with a guy who took great offence at me chatting to her (my hand was on her ass during the conversation). He pushed me away, and the nurse caught me in her arms. There was no point in arguing with him, so I stayed where I was. The rest of the night was some sort of medical blur. Nurses really are yellow cab specials…

Flash forward to Saturday night, and England are playing Australia at Twickenham. I had just fought my way to the bar, when the bloody Chinese Dancer popped up under my arm. "No pregnant girlfriend tonight" she asked…

I bought her a drink, and told her she was just a friend. The Chinese Dancer moved really close, and was about to seal the deal ,when Echila arrived, all boobs and legs in a low top and micro mini. "Hello – that guy last night, he sooo rude, I want be with you tonight". The Chinese Dancer stamped on my foot and stormed off.

I tried to educate Echila on the fine art of rugby union. She went wet between the legs over Johnny Wilkinson, then decided to go home in the last quarter. I let her go. A girl is only a girl, but a good game of Rugby is a smoke to paraphrase Kipling.

The Dancer left early too, punching me on the arm with a pout as she left the bar on her own.

To be continued….

"You must choose between me and your cigar."
- Breach of Promise Case, circa 1885. Rudyard Kipling

OPEN the old cigar-box, get me a Cuba stout,
For things are running crossways, and Maggie and I are out.

We quarrelled about Havanas-we fought o'er a good cheroot,
And I knew she is exacting, and she says I am a brute.

Open the old cigar-box-let me consider anew-
Old friends, and who is Maggie that I should abandon you?

A million surplus Maggies are willing to bear the yoke;
And a woman is only a woman, but a good Cigar is a Smoke.

Light me another Cuba-I hold to my first-sworn vows.
If Maggie will have no rival, I'll have no Maggie for Spouse!

Malik Hassan is a TERRORIST!

2009-11-07T21:51:00.001-08:00

Meanwhile, in the USA Malik Nadal Hassan went crazy with a gun at Ford Hood.

Or did he?

I am not suggesting (as I am sure Muslims will do) that this was a CIA conspiracy and Hassan was an innocent patsy.

Far more sinister, I am about to suggest he was a terrorist.

Firstly, Muslims make up less than 0.3 percent of America's active duty military forces. Of the roughly 548,000 soldiers in the U.S. Army , there are 2,500 Muslims. That's a very small percentage, and the chances of the attack being just plain craziness on behalf of a soldier are about the same. In other words you could reverse the percentages and say it's a 99.7% chance that the guy is a terrorist.

Secondly, there are credible reports he was shouting "Allahu Akbar" as he was shooting. God is Great, a common war cry during terrorist atrocities. Not "I hate my life". Not "my daddy didn't love me". It was Allahu Akbar!

Thirdly, the attack came only hours after five British soldiers were killed by a "comrade" in the Afghan Police force. Another coincidence? Or was it, in typical Islamic terrorist fashion, a concerted effort.

Fourthly, the FBI had investigated this murderer for his radical postings on the internet. History will show this as another example of warning signs being clearly visible, but political correctness took precedence over the risk of having a terrorist in the midst of the defence force. He should have been kicked out at that time.

Fifthly, the guys behaviour showed some serious assimilation problems. He had refused to be included on official army photographs that included women, citing his religion as the reason. He dressed in traditional Arabic garb, and described himself as Palestinian on web sites.

One or two of these issues could be overlooked and we might say he just snapped. But when you look at the whole picture he clearly is a fucking terrorist, doing what Islamic terrorist do best – murdering people who cant fight back.

Obama, himself a closet Muslim, isn't saying much. I doubt the army is either. Mind you, if they don't say and do something very quickly its going to get unpleasant. I can see a situation where pissed off soldiers decide to reduce the risk by reducing the numbers of Muslim comrades by fair means or foul.

The obvious answer would be to ban Muslims from the army, partially for their own safety….

And the real problem for Obama is Hassan isn't dead. He is going to get better. He is going to be tried for murder. And he is going to tell the world why he did it….. Obama cant keep that quiet….

Footnote: I just learned that Hassan attended the controversial Dar Al Hijrah mosque at the same time as two of the September 11 terrorists.

Footnote2: already his family are protesting that he cannot have committed this crime. "He is such a gentle boy" they spout. Just wait. Within a week it will be blamed on a CIA plot.

Zaket verses Australian Aid to Islamic Countries (a waste of my taxes)

2009-11-07T20:09:00.001-08:00

Following the theme of my last post, this is what MY GOVERNMENT spends MY TAXES on:

Aid to Islamic Indonesia (88% Muslim): $462 Million

Aid to Islamic Bangladesh (89% Muslim): $42 million

Aid to Islamic Pakistan (96% Muslim): $58 Million

Aid to Islamic Afghanistan (99.7% Muslim) : $88 Million

Aid to Islamic Palestine (96% Muslim): $32 Million

Aid to Islamic Iraq (99% Muslim): $45 Million

We even provided $5 Million to the country that was stoning people to death last week.

Meanwhile in the Islamic world, zakat, paying a portion of one's wealth to specifically designated recipients is a way of purifying oneself, on par with prayers (see Koran 9:103). However, there are eight possible categories of recipients — one of these being those fighting "in the path of Allah," that is, jihadis, also known as "terrorists."

So when my government hands over my taxes to Islamic countries to feed and educate its children, these Islamic countries hand over their charity money to kill me.

The Taliban warning to Australia – what utter bollox!

2009-11-07T19:44:00.001-08:00

Those cheerful chaps in the Taliban have announced that "Australia will have to assimilate into a dominant Asia or face the prospect of being overpowered and forced to take population overspill from Asia".

http://www.theaustralian.com.au/news/nation/join-muslim-asia-or-perish-taliban/story-e6frg6nf-1225794873972

The old bear almost pissed his fur. Not in fear, but in laughter.

You see, we are being forced to take a "population overspill" already, however these hordes are not arriving because we are "nearly empty of people, apart from scattered groups of white residents", they are arriving because we ARE a wealthy advanced nation. No one comes here and settles on the Simpson Desert!!! They arrive and drive a taxi in Sydney.

Which makes another line from the Taliban even more laughable: that Australia "must reconcile with its Asian surroundings and assimilate into it as a wealthy and active member."

What utter arrogant bullshit.

We are the bloody wealthy and active nation in the region. Despite the way the neighbours treat us, we prop up most of their third world pisspot countries with our aid. Money from my taxes heads straight to third world Islamic countries like Indonesia and Pakistan. In fact we spend MORE on aid to Afghanistan than we spend on fighting the Taliban.

(Correction: last year we gave $88M in Aid to Afghanistan ,and the cost of fighting the Taliban was $102M - HOWEVER, the Australian Army also spent a further $97M on "community based projects" (Aid by another name....).

I find it incredible that this bunch of retarded tosspots actually think that by imposing their interpretation of Islam in Australia, the people of Australia (and all the other countries we prop up) would be better off.

To be honest I am sick of crackpot Islamists and their crap.

Let be blunt here – the people of Somalia aren't exactly thriving under the new sharia laws are they?

Not long ago a shocked-looking Mohamed Ismail brought into the park. His right hand was held up to the crowds. It was then laid on a table and severed immediately and without ceremony at the wrist. The eyewitness told of his horror as the bloody body part was dangled by its index finger in front of the crowd to prove that punishment had been meted out.

These wankers are the same ones who stoned to death a 13 year old mentally disabled girl.

The other day a crowd of about 300 people in Merka, south of Mogadishu, watched as Abas Hussein Abdirahman, 33, was stoned to death for adultery. Witnesses said he was screaming and blood was pouring from his head during the stoning. His girlfriend will be stoned to death after she has given birth.

The chance of Australia joining some pan Asian crackpot Islamic movement is far less than zero. And if it did, we would slip into the same crap mess they the rest of the Islamic world is in, and we would be unable to feed the rest of them, they effectively destroying any pan Asian Islamic world anyway.

Morons.

Bonfire Birthday…….

2009-11-06T02:14:00.001-08:00

Remember, remember the fifth of November,

The gunpowder treason and plot,

I know of no reason

Why the gunpowder treason

Should ever be forgot.

It was my birthday yesterday. 32 again….

It coincides with Guy Fawkes night, when in England we burn an effigy of Guy Fawkes on top of a bonfire, and let off fireworks.

Guy was a Catholic terrorist who tried to blow up the British Parliament, thereby killing the Protestant King of England. Despite the bonfires, he was actually hanged. He was due to be hung, drawn and quartered, but he jumped and broke his neck.

These days if a terrorist tried to blow up parliament and kill the Queen there would be uproar. Protesters would shout about his rights, and his supporters would be parading on the streets. Any burning of effigies would "offend minorities" and be banned.

In other words we have lost before we start. A murdering assholes rights mean more than the innocent people he attempts to murder.

Sir William Wade had the right idea. He would piss himself laughing at Guantanamo, warm a few irons in the fire and get out a skinners knife……

Changing of the Guard in Blokm, hookers replace good time girls :(

2009-11-03T18:38:00.001-08:00

For over 20 years now I have been flying in and out of Jakarta.

This doesn't make me an expert or an expat. It means I know the place vaguely, have some friends there, and most of all – I have noted the changes. And I have probably noted them more than the expats who live there, because changes are more obvious to regular visitors than to locals.

I have noticed the obvious: the high rise, the tollways, the transjakarta busways, the massive malls. And I have noticed the not so obvious. The increase in standards of living, and in my opinion a reduction in happiness.

I should point out at this juncture that my involvement with the average Jakartan is limited, and is involves mostly bars and girls.

Which brings me to BlokM and its sub culture.

For those who don't know, BlokM is an area of Jakarta, famous for its shopping mall, it open air market, and a row of sleazy bars. In the 1980s the mall didn't exist, just a huge open air market, a handful of smaller indoor markets, a bus station and the bars. These bars looked in the late 80s, how I expect Bangkok bars were in the Vietnam heady R&R days of the late 60s. Cheap local beers, utilitarian, music, and girls girls girls.

These were good time girls. They usually had a job of some type (other than selling sex), they had a sense of fun, and they were bored with the restrictive life that Jakarta offered. This point is central to this post, so I will repeat it. They were bored with the restrictive life that Jakarta offered at that time.

No one took a holiday in Jakarta. No lager swilling yobbo with a Lonely Planet guide got off the plane. They only guys who frequented the bars were expats and visitors, and in general the only place a normal girl would meet a Westerner would be in a bar. A night drinking and dining in a cheap BlokM bar was an interesting experience for a local girl. I remember being asked about England and Australia….

So a mutual arrangement was forged. Guys had a few cheap beers in the company of a beautiful girl. She was witty, funny, flirty and sexy. Girls had a few free drinks with an interesting guy. He was usually well travelled and (given that he almost certainly held a reasonable job to be in Jakarta in the first place) educated.

And the night usually ended, in that matter of fact Indonesian way, in bed. Good luck to all concerned!!! And in the morning the guy usually gave the girl taxi money to get home, and in a way of saving her face, he usually overestimated the taxi fare by a substantial amount.

This doesn't mean the girls were hookers. Far from it, they were just as happy to catch the bus home, with just a kiss lingering on their lips. But it was a nice end to a nice night for all concerned, and the girls had bugger all in life. A little extra cash meant a new dress, new shoes and handbag.

Sometime in the last 10 years in all changed. Slowly at first, then with an ever increasing momentum.

Instead of shyly sitting in a bar with an empty glass, in the hope that some kind guy would buy them a drink, the girls became aggressive. "Buy me drink meesta".

Instead of being witty, funny, flirty and sexy, they became forthright. "We go home your place now meeesta"

To be fair, they guys changed too. Many were now backpackers or poorly paid English teachers. They were less educated, less interesting, less travelled. More guys asked the girls direct commercial sex questions like "how much for anal?"

On top of that, they girls now had the internet and mobile phones. They knew more about Australia than I did. On my last visit in June this year one girl asked me which suburb I lived in. She knew most of the city suburbs and the median house prices for each.

The problem was:

Jakarta no longer offered a restrictive life to these girls. They had world class clubs and bars, internet chat friends all over the world, and a much improved lifestyle.
The guys went (in my opinion) down during this period. Partly due to the economic meltdown of 98, partly due to globalisation.

And so the goodtime girls have almost gone, replaced by hard faced hookers who want to get you into bed, and then get out of it as quickly as possible, with the entire contents of your wallet.

The bars didn't help either. The old utilitarian charm and cheap beers were replaced by techno dancefloors, big screen TVs, BKK style shows (wet t shirts, pole dancing etc). Suddenly, in about 2004, BlokM became a small scale version of nana Plaza or Soi Cowboy. This scared off the last of the good time girls….

I went a couple of times in June. Top Gun and Oscars, both the last of the old time bars, had been "improved". I felt I was in Patpong… The hardened pros looked me up and sized my worth in an instant. No one "accidentally" bumped into me, with a heartstopping smile on her lips. No one shyly came up and asked if I spoke English. Instead some girl came up and asked "you want short time meesta…"

I found things marginally better at BATS (see my comment in an earlier post). But in general, the good days are over for ever. Which is a great pity. A lot of nice people had a lot of harmless fun over the years.

My old friends at the Blokm website considered closing the site about a year ago:

http://jakartablokm.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=10&t=1148&start=0&hilit=poll

They complain about all nighters being a thing of the past:

http://jakartablokm.com/forum/viewtopic.php?f=2&t=1240

And the rest of the site now fills with sad reminiscing of times gone bye.

Heres to happy days, and for all the girls I kissed at dawn, I meant what I said.

Annas Blog………

2009-11-01T19:04:00.001-08:00

I stumbled upon a blog last night. I read though, almost in a state of intrigue. It was like opening a strangers diary. The Bear is careful – you read what he wants you to read. You only see the life he wants you to see. He leaves out that bad bits, the sad bits…

Anna doesn't, and its hard not to like her. She is sweet and innocent. Its like a romantic book when you read of her love for Rick – although it goes against her claims to be a feminist.

Her old blogs (she seems to be inactive now) are at:

http://www.blog.co.uk/user/nona_4nna/

http://www.blog.co.uk/user/nan29/

anyway go for life Anna. Enjoy every minute of it. In the words of Bule Oyster Cult, Don't Fear The Reaper….

Halloween…..

2009-11-01T16:06:00.001-08:00

The bar was full of ghouls and people in weird costumes. The Japanese girls arrived looking like a Cosplay Convention on legs. They missed the point in Halloween – erotic maids outfits don't really seem to fit in, although the display of flesh may have attracted a few vampires to go with the ogling perverts. ..

I was in the middle of the round of kisses and "Combawa Polarbear San", and strategically placing a hand on the ass of each girl, when I noticed the Chinese Dancer sitting on her own on a stool. She was glaring at me. I didn't recognise her at first. If she was wearing makeup, then it had been applied sparingly, and she wore jeans and a yellow top. Perhaps she had just finished work. I just smiled and got back to the pleasures in hand, which involved a rather sexy fishnet stocking top. I tried asking why the girls were wearing sexy costumes on Halloween, but didn't get sensible answers. I guess it was just dress up and flirt night.

Later we were crowded on the edge of the dance floor. The girls were bouncing as they danced, bodies jiggling in time to the music. I stepped back onto the steps, and someone leaned onto me. Before I could turn the body started swaying and dancing, arms high up around the sides of my head. I saw the yellow sleeves, and knew it was the Chinese Dancer.

I have seen her around for some time. We always look at each other, smile and mouth "hello" when we first see each other, and then pretend to ignore each other for the rest of the night. She is usually with two other girls, she looks older, has a beautiful face and is by far the better dancer of the trio. She sways rhythmically with her hands high in the air, and gets a lot of attention from the guys.

I don't know how or why our strange relationship started. I guess she expects men to chase her, and I have no intention of doing that. I do find her fascinating though. As I mentioned in an earlier post, if I am with another girl she makes damn sure that I notice her presence. She does this by dancing close to me, getting in direct line of view, bumping into me, and if all else fails, kicking me.

I have no intentions whatsoever with her, and I seriously doubt she has any with me. I would be happy to dance and chat with her, if she comes up and asks me to. She doesn't seem to want to.

Anyway, last night she was leaning on me on the steps, pushing her breasts into my back, and dancing seductively. The Japanese girls noticed, and nudged each other. I turned, and she feigned surprise. She said she was sorry and backed away. I stepped down onto the dance floor again, into the cosplay crowd. Suddenly the crowd parted and a girl moved close to me. A Thai girl, thin, with silicon implants. I have known her a while, and we are just good friends. She grabbed my hand and held it, saying "oh Polar, all these men stare at me". Perhaps they were staring because she was wearing a black see through dress, which looked like, and probably was, a negligee. Under it she wore skin tight satin shorts. The image was of a naked girl with her ass sprayed black. Her silicon implants were standing firm, with big nipples clearly on show. Dear god, how had she got past security. Still, this was Halloween…

We danced, her still holding my hand. A group of ogling men formed, each intend on taking her off me. The Chinese Dancer pushed her way into the group, started dancing on front of me, then looked at the Thai girl and shook her head. The Japanese girls dragged the Thai girl deep into the dance floor. All of the ogling guys followed like Pavlov's Dogs. The Chinese Dancer, happy that her rival had gone, went back to flirting with some guy on the mezzanine floor behind me.

I finished my beer and walked home.

If I live to be 1000 I will never understand women.

The Ladyboy, Katoey, Banci, Waria, shemale, ladyboy pickup on the dance floor…..

2009-10-30T19:57:00.001-07:00

Courtship is a dance. A verbal and body language tango…

A few weeks ago a recently divorced friend asked me to take him out and show him the scene. As we walked into the Cargo Bar I told him to avoid eye contact, don't ever stare, don't talk to anyone and NEVER dance. He asked if the Cargo was a fighting bar. I told him it was the ground rules for picking up girls. He didn't understand.

We stood drinking beers at one of the few tables left actually on the dance floor. All around us girls were seductively dancing. He pointed several out to me. I sternly ordered him not to look. Keep his eyes no me, talk about work. The girls started dancing erotically right in front of us. Two did a simple lesbian routine, dancing in each others arms, erotically touching each other in time to the music. From the corner of my eye I could see them regularly checking us (and all the other guys) out.

My friend became more and more excited. "Just look at them" he shouted. I repeatedly warned him not to look . Eventually one girl danced in front of him, and in a sudden move pulled a breast out from over her low top. In a flash my friend was dancing with her, and just as quick he was back, rejected and dejected, at the table.

"Why did she tell me to piss off" he asked. I told him its all a game about egos and street credibility. The girls want that warm feeling of being wanted and lusted after. Like sirens on a rock they take pleasure in attracting the attentions of guys. And when they have achieved the attention, they lose interest. Like Groucho Marks, they never want a guy that they can have. (Groucho didn't want men, he said he wouldn't bother joining a Club that would accept him as a member, but the logic is the same.

The art, I told my friend, is to play bloody hard to get, enjoying the show, and taking a chance that they will become so intrigued that they let their guard slip.

So flash forward to last night, when I was in a bar with a Russian friend. Exactly the same scenario – recently separated, and out to play after a few years on the bench.

His MO was to tap each girl on the shoulder and point at the dance floor. In an ever dejected way, he kept a running tally of the girls who said no. I rolled my eyes…

For a while now I have been having a standoffish flirting relationship with a Chinese girl. I mentioned her in an earlier post. The good dancer…. We look at each and smile, and then look away. We very pointedly ignore each other all night. She dances close to me, bumps into me and then glances over her shoulder as she walks away.

I hasten to add that I have no real intentions with her, and I doubt she has with me. Its just a game we play. But she is cute….

I was drinking with the Russian (who isn't really Russian). Up came another Chinese girl, a good friend of mine called Ellie. She laughed and joked me with, put her arms around me and kissed my cheek. Her body felt good hugged close to me, as we swayed to the music. Suddenly the Chinese dancer walked up and started erotically dancing right next to us, bumped into us, and then kicked me on the leg.

The Russian asked "what the hell was that all about". I explained that it was the game. The ritual. Even though I have never even spoken to the dancer, she feels some parochial ownership of my attention. It wasn't jealousy about Ellie, just a fit of pique about my not showing her enough interest.

A little later someone fondled my backside. I turned to face a tall incredibly beautiful girl in a short blue dress. The V front exposed most of two massive beasts, they must have been J cup. The dress was short, just covering her ass and exposing two very shapely legs. "You dance with me" said the girl, in her Thai accent.

We danced for a while. Her hands all over me. She looked deep into my eyes, and said "you come home my place now"…

I todl her no, and when she asked why, I said it was because she was almost certainly a Katoey, (a banci, ladyboy, shemale, transvestite). She asked how I knew.

I told her she looked like a beautiful girl, sounded like one, and felt like one, but her flirting and courtship was more like my Russian friend than the Cargo Bar girls. (I didn't mention that fact that her reinforced grandma type knickers are a giveaway that someone is hiding an errant penis under that short skirt – a g string might allow the bugger too much freedom).

She tried hard to persuade me, telling me of all the pleasures I could have. I was resolute in saying no. Suddenly my Russian friend appeared, tapped her on the shoulder and pointed to the dance floor. The beautiful ladyboy giggled, and dragged him into the crowd. The last I saw of him his hand was sliding up her thigh, towards a large surprise.

I walked home musing on the basic differences between men and women. Men, even the transsexual ones (in my mind if you have a penis you are a man), flirt like men…..

You’re so Vain, I be you think this blog is about you….

2009-10-30T03:10:00.001-07:00

A song is an enigma.

In late 72 Carry Simon released you're so vain. The song is a critical profile of a self-absorbed lover, and was a number-one hit in early 1973. The song spawned the biggest musical mystery of the era. Who was so vain?

"Then you flew your Learjet up to Nova Scotia to see the total eclipse of the sun", refers to an eclipse that was visible from Nova Scotia on July 10, 1972, '

"I hear you went up to Saratoga and your horse naturally won," refers to the Saratoga Race Course meeting held in late July, August, and early September in Saratoga Springs, New York.

Carrey never revealed who it was for. Popular guesses on the subject include Mick Jagger (who sang uncredited backing vocals on the song), Cat Stevens, Warren Beatty, Kris Kristofferson (with whom she had had brief relationships), the unfaithful fiancé William Donaldson and Simon's ex-husband, James Taylor.

A girl once sang it to me. It was about that time. We sat on a dry stone wall after a party. I had a bottle of Champaign in my hand.

They played it on the radio today, when I was in a coffee shop.

I put down my coffee and walked away. Memories are a bummer…

What girls look for in a man…

2009-10-29T19:00:00.001-07:00

I have this theory. Girls don't look for one man, they look for a composite man:

* They look for a Protector. A guy in uniform. Army, police, hell even a Boy Scout. This is the man they curl up next to at night, safe in his arms. Nothing can harm them when he is in their bed.

* They look for a Provider. A Guy is a suit, with a good stable job, a career, good credit, a mortgage, superannuation, a good bank balance. This is the guy they take shopping (and marry).

* They look for a Bad Boy. A Hells Angel, a Toy Boy, a Cad and a Villain. This is the guy they take to bed for wild sex. He is so naughty!

* They look for a Father Figure. They never quite get over growing up and losing the Daddys Little Girl thing. So they look for men who are older, who look and act like their father. Like a little girl they seek his approval in all that they do, And like a little girl they flirt for his attention.

* They look for a Little Boy. The maternal instinct is strong in all girls, they look for the helpless little boy figure who really needs them. They see the missing button on the shirt, they see the rumpled helplessness of a single guy and feel the need to mother him.

* They look for the Sensitive New Age Guy, who knows that high heels hurt, PMT is a bitch, and having a size 10 bust and size 18 ass is a real bummer.

* They look for the old fashioned hard assed Alpha Male with a beer one hand and a pool cue in the other.

And they seek a whole lot more. The trick is being this multiple personality without finding yourself committed to a mental institution.

Helen Smith gets a funeral.

2009-10-28T20:27:00.001-07:00

Strange coincidence number 21222322:

My last post mentioned Dubai. Then today I read about the funeral of Helen Smith.

Her death occurred when I was there. I remember my mother freaking out about the whole thing.

To understand everything, you need to put your mind back to the 1970s. Firstly, in those days there was still a lot of goodwill and respect for the English in the Middle East. Not that long ago we were 'protectors" of the protectorates of the region, and the locals only ever saw military or foreign office personnel. The sudden rush of oil wealth attracted expats, most of whom were initially ex military or foreign office types. They knew the ropes, kept themselves under control, and didn't piss off the locals. True they did stupid things, but the espirit de corps of the expats kept things under control . We cleaned up our own shit.

Secondly, hardly anyone ever went there. I had to look the bloody place up in a book. There were no "economy/welfare class" tourists getting off the plane with a can of larger in one hand and a Lonely Planet guide in the other.

Thirdly, hardly anyone in the UK had seen an Arab, unless they were ex military or foreign Service types.

By the time I arrived this was just beginning to change. Newer expats arrived and demanded to watch "Coronation Street" on TV. They wanted fish and chips, bars, and despised the locals.

Even when I arrived you could distinguish between the "Old Hands" and the "New Hands". I remember catching a ferry across the Creek, and seeing and young English housewife in shorts and a white blouse tied at the midriff, and heard her shout "What the fuck are youse staring at" to the men on the boat.

Anyway, this was the time and atmosphere that Helen Smith died in.

In May 1979 she was found lying on the ground after partying in a block of flats in Saudi Arabia. She was assumed to have fallen after drinking (illegal in Saudi).

There are a number of "odd things" about the case:

Helen was found lying in the road fully clothed. Another man was found with his underpants around his thighs, impaled upon the spiked railings surrounding the apartment block.
The original autopsy report was retained by Foreign office, despite her family's requests for a copy. And when it was finally issued, a vital page was missing.
Helen's body was examined by Egyptian pathologist Dr Ali Kheir on May 20, 1979. Her pelvis, several ribs and right shoulder were broken. There was also bruising and internal injuries including brain and liver haemorrhage.
There were also controversial injuries, including a large bruise on the left side of her head, the broken breastbone and bruises on the inside of her thighs.
Two other post mortems, one by a Danish and one by a British pathologist have concluded, that the girl could not have fallen from the balcony in the alleged manner.
Guests at the party said the saw the bodies when they went onto the balcony to see the sunrise. The balcony faced the wrong way to do that.
The original inquest concluded that she and the other guy fell during sex. But she was fully dressed. A later British inquest resulted in an Open Verdict.

It seems that her father has now relented to his daughters funeral, and has given up his fight to find the truth. I guess the only people who really know what happened that night are either dead or have no intention of ever speaking.

Banning the minaret, and memories of Dubai….

2009-10-28T17:36:00.001-07:00

I remember being in Dubai long ago, and hearing the adhan early in the morning, being half sung half shouted from the mosque tower. There were no electronic aids, just an elderly Arab at the top of a tall tower in the old quarter. It was my second day in the Middle East, and at that moment I knew I had arrived.

In a months time the people of Switzerland will vote on a referendum to ban minarets. A minaret (meaning lighthouse in Arabic) is the tower at a mosque, from which the daily adhan or call to prayer is shouted or sung. Like the mosques themselves, they are often works of architectural beauty.

They are as much a part of a mosque as a steeple is to a church. I can't quite see why some people in Switzerland want them banned. The Swiss Christian and Jewish leaders have united with the Muslim leaders in objection to the move.

I see no logic or reason behind such a ban, other than an attempt to keep Moslems out of Switzerland. I could understand some people agitating to ban the Koran, as in some of its interpretations it could be viewed as inciting the breaking of many Swiss laws (violence, murder, pedophilia spring to mind) but a tower of architectural merit?

What I would ask for though, is some restrictions – to meet building codes and noise restrictions. No one wants a 300m architectural monstrosity looming over a single story town, and no one wants to be awakened by a thousand decibel electronically distorted voice at 4am.

I have never seen a bad looking minaret, (although they must exist somewhere). Architecture is a key feature of Islam, and they carefully maintain that reputation. On the other hand I have been deafened at 4am by a call to prayer!

Last days of Rome, Mad Max and old memories captured on film…

2009-10-27T16:45:00.001-07:00

Someone emailed me a photo from the UK. 28 people outside a bar.

I even remember that photo being taken, one summers afternoon long ago. To be honest, most of the people on it were a bunch of assholes and I wouldn't piss on them if they were no fire. Arrogant, stupid, small minded country bumpkins. A few are now dead. Road accidents, drowning, natural causes. Another is a paraplegic after a car crash. God knows about the others…. Probably still in the same bar every Saturday afternoon..

On other subjects:

They are making new Mad Max movie.

Two odd things. Firstly in 1988 I caught a lift back from a bar with a friend. His car was a 1974 Falcon HB Coupe. As we got in, in an underground car park in Sydney, he asked "do you recognise the car?"

I didn't.

On the harbour bridge he floored it, and it was incredible. It leapt over the bridge like a Ferrari. It was the Mad Max interceptor model, the full v8 engine and race pack. He picked one up cheap. In those days no one wanted one. The 4 door version was for many years the fastest 4 door saloon in the world, reaching over 140 mph. Another night the bloody thing broke down near the Oaks on Military Road. The three of us tried to restart it, and he offered to sell it to me for a small sum. I forget how much. I did consider respraying it matt black and putting 3 propane tanks across the boot.

Years later I was on an army exercise. I was sleeping in the back of a landrover when someone shook me. "Did you ever see Mad Max? they asked me. The road was the one used for the famous chase scenes.

We stopped for a brew, and toasted the Road Warrior in tea.

Im sick of Sydney right now. I'm getting obsessed with the Red Square bar, just as I was with Tanamur. Not just the hot girls, but the music, the friends, the party attitude.

Like the final days of Rome, the legions have returned, and there is no tomorrow.

Part 2, in which Santi holds my brown thing in BATS, Shangri La, Jakarta

2009-10-26T19:04:00.001-07:00

I still use my old filofax. An old battered brown leather thing. Even in the days of laptops, cloud computing and blackberries, I trust it. It doesn't go flat, doesn't lock up, and I can stuff things in it.

Long ago, before time began, it was my constant companion on my global travels. If I lost it I would die. Money, credit cards, passport, airline tickets, hotel bookings, contact details, notes and bits of paper filled it to bursting point. I hopped from country to country with it in my hand.

A few months ago I was drinking in BATS in the Jakarta Shangri La. I was at a table surrounded by Jakarta's finest bar girls. My Filofax had about 10 million Rupiah, $1000 Australian, both of my passports, my airline ticket, credit cards etc in it. Slightly drunk, I looked around for the gents. As I walked from the table I pushed the filofax to one of the girls, asking 'please look after this for me".

When I came back the girl and the filofax were gone. Dumbfounded, I stood at the table, wondering what to do next. Then I saw the girl, dancing near the band, waving my filofax in her hand.

I didn't check the contents in the bar. To do so would imply a lack of trust. Later, in my hotel room, I found all the contents intact. The girl had, however opened the filofax. Carefully written in the contacts section was "I love you, Santi, +6269########".

I bought Santi several drinks, just for the pleasure of her company at the table. I am really glad I did so.

Asian bar girl rips off idiot westerner……

2009-10-26T18:20:00.001-07:00

A few days ago I was asked to meet a guy. A friend of a friend who had a big problem. Lets call him John.

John is in his mid 50s. He divorced about 5 years ago, and acquired about $500,000 in the divorce settlement. He inherited about a further $500,000 from the sale of his parents home on their death. About a year ago he took early retirement from his public service job, and can now access his superannuation of about $300,000.

John has always worked in semi skilled manual labour for the government. I doubt he has ever worked hard, and he isn't bright. No degree (or as far as I know qualifications of any kind) and not a high IQ.

So John was cashed up with over a Million dollars that he had acquired, not by working hard or using his brain, but though the natural progress of life.

After retiring he took a holiday in Asia with a couple of guys. He had never been overseas in his life. The other guys go to Asia 2-3 times a year, on what I would call "sex tours".

The recipe for disaster was there. A not so bright guy, with over a million at his disposal, going to Asia for the first time, with a couple of likely lads.

Apparently the first trip went fine, John got pissed and laid every night. He enjoyed all of the forbidden pleasures on offer. Girls, shemales, 3somes. The did everything that his fat ugly wife flatly refused to do, and the girls did it with a smile on their faces.

Shortly after his return, John went back for another bite of the cherry. Then another. He became a regular tourist.

In Australia John is treated for what he is, a fat, balding loser in life. In Asia he is treated how he wants to be treated, like a 30 year old stud. The cheap lifestyle, the admiration, the comradeship with other fat old losers, all attracted him. So did the girls.

Then he fell in love. Some bar girl, who promised him she loved him like no other, and she wanted him for ever. She was 22, and she had an idea. If John bought a block of land in her hometown and built some apartments on it, they could live in one, and live on the rent from the others. Brilliant!

John loved the idea. He bragged about it to all of his friends. The original "Likely Lads" tried to warn him. He didn't listen.

There was on slight problem. Foreigners cannot buy land. The solution was easy. The land was bought in the girls name, using Johns money. More of his money was poured into construction.

John moved into a bed sit in Australia, whilst construction went on. He liquidated his assets and managed affairs from this end. She managed the construction from her end. There seemed endless demands for more money. He sold his car, and borrowed from the bank and on his credit cards.

Warning bells would have been sounding long and loud in a bright person, but John isn't bright. He just couldn't understand the scam.

A couple of months ago John used his last credit to fly over and find out what was going on. Construction was taking too long, and was way over budget. The excuses didn't seem reasonable, and now the girl hardly ever answered the phone.

The complex was just about finished. He couldn't gain access. When he asked the builders to let him in they refused. Eventually security guards arrived and manhandled him off the site. His protests went on deaf ears.

Eventually John discovered that the girl was married to a local, and had been all along. Foolishly he made some threats. The husbands family arrived and made things very clear. John had to get out quickly.

Back in the bar John still didn't seem to comprehend what happened. I had several goes at explaining, until I lost my cool. A fool and his money are soon parted, and he fell for the oldest trick in the book. The girls and her husband are now set up for life. A million dollar property investment at zero cost. And so easy….

John is bankrupt. He owes about $30,000 in Australia, his superannuation pension is gone, so is his inheritance. He is living in a cheap bedsit, and looking for a job.

He asked me if I know anyone there who dished out punishment for money. I don't, and if I did he couldnt afford to pay and I don't think it would be justified. He gave the money away as much as she took it.

The best bit though, is he told me – "as soon as I can afford to get back to Asia I will go for a holiday. The girls there appreciate me".

Final gunfight, just for a few dollars more

2009-10-25T03:43:00.001-07:00

Some movie scenes have it all. The actors, the camerawork, the emotion, the score, the atmosphere.

Sergio Leone's classic final gunfight scene in "For a Few Dollars More"

Everything about the five minute scene is magnificent.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b2l4IKz3m7c&NR=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJf9DmfMcao&feature=related

The Bit they left out of “Underbelly” – the Shane Chartres-Abbott story….

2009-10-24T21:51:00.001-07:00

Like most Australians I was engrossed in the TV series "Underbelly".

Here is a bit they left out:

The Girl in the shower:

In August 2002 a 30 year old Thai female sex worker was found naked, bloodied and unconscious in a room at South Yarra's Saville Hotel. She had bite marks on her thigh, black eyes, a bruised neck and jaw and up to 5cm of her tongue bitten off, when she was discovered in a foetal position in the shower cubicle.

She had hired a male "rough sex" prostitute called Shane Chartres-Abbott because she felt "horny".

She said she had sex with Chartres-Abbott, who used the name "Simon", on a couple of previous occasions, paying up to $880 for a session. But on the night of August 16 she said Chartres-Abbott tied her naked to the bed, pushed a pillow in her face and anally raped her.

"I feel scared, because I didn't know he was going to do that," she told the court. The victim claimed the next thing she remembered was waking up in hospital. She spent 17 days in the Alfred Hospital.

The Rough Trade boy:

Shane Chartres-Abbott (real name Shane Patrick Bowen) was a clean-cut young furniture salesman who also worked part time as a "rough trade" prostitute, servicing men and women for $300 per hour. According to a friend he was a "consummate professional", who was popular with both male and female clients. His trainee nurse girlfriend of 2 years was 6 months pregnant. He also claimed to be a 200-year-old vampire who had been in Melbourne before the city was built and drank blood to live.

Prior to meeting the Thai girl in the Saville Hotel, Chartres-Abbott had visited a female prostitute in West Melbourne, where he paid about $250 for an hour - but paid half cash and the rest on a credit card.

The Rape trial:

Following the hotel room incident Chartres-Abbott was charged with rape, despite having been hired to have sex with the girl. There seems to be no explanation why he was not charged with common assault and theft. Her phone was found in Chartres-Abbott's bag and her blood on his clothes.

In his defence Chartres-Abbott claimed that the girl had told him that she and a friend were grooming him to appear in a "snuff movie", however she had gone cold on the idea because she had developed an affection for him. He claimed the woman was attacked after he left the hotel about 5am, in revenge for telling him of the snuff plot.

The murder:

On day four of the rape trial, the Judge ordered the removal of any reference in court papers to Chartres-Abbott's home address after a request from his lawyer. The following morning he was shot dead outside his home, in front his pregnant girlfriend. It was a professional hit. Two men, one wearing a beanie and a scarf, the other man with a jumper pulled over his face, stepped off the footpath. The assaulted the girlfriend and her father, then shot Chartres-Abbott in the body and head. He died at the scene.

The motive:

Two possible motives for the murder were mooted. One was revenge for attacking the Thai girl, the other was to shut Chartres-Abbott up. He knew a lot about the sex lives of his customers.

The Guilty finding:

Evangelos Goussis and Keith Faure were found guilty of the murder of Chartres-Abbott. Both are currently serving jail sentences for murder anyway. The gangland killers were also responsible for the executions of Lewis Moran and Lewis Caine, of "Underbelly" fame.

The sentences for the murder of are Chartres-Abbott are to be served concurrently, and will not affect their time in jail. They are both career criminals and hit men. According to Faure, he murdered Chartres-Abbott as a "favour" for someone who had been a "close associate" for many years, and that he regarded Chartres-Abbott as "an animal" and as "a danger to other females" and that it was a "revenge killing". Keith Faure "confessed", without any prompting. Det Sen-Sgt Ron Iddles told the court Faure had not been a suspect and the investigation had come to a standstill before he came forward to confess to the murder.

The "Missing Man:

POLICE have now launched a national manhunt, with a $1 million reward, for the man they believe ordered the murder Chartres-Abbott. An arrest warrant has been issued for Mr Mark Perry, the former boyfriend of the woman Chartres-Abbott allegedly raped and assaulted. Mr Perry had broken up with the Thai victim and had started a relationship with another Thai woman - who he had a child with - when his ex-girlfriend was allegedly attacked.

The former butcher and bouncer has been on the run across Australia for two years. The Victorian has been seen in Queensland, where he has lived. He has also resided in Western Australia, the Northern Territory and Thailand. "Perry is elusive and skilled at avoiding police," a police source said. "He is likely to be living under an assumed name and may have changed his appearance. He is extremely adept at staying below the radar. He's well connected and has the ability to travel in and out of Australia illegally" said the police.

The Victorian Police:

Investigations have indicated that Melbourne police were heavily implicated in the murder. The police corruption surrounding Chartres-Abbott's death have led to big upheavals in the force. The investigations are still continuing, and the corrupt police are as good as ever at avoiding charges. Suffice to say they are in this business up to their ears.

The Bears theory:

My own theory is that Evangelos Goussis and Keith Faure had nothing to do with the murder. Their confession, completely out of the blue, came at no cost to them, and probably with some reward. This provided the public with killers to blame, and an end to the case.

The Thai hooker was almost certainly up to no good with Chartres-Abbott. His claims of a snuff movie are probably somewhere near the truth. He probably beat her after she told him.

His rape trial was about to open an entire can of worms. He was in a position to embarrass and ruin the careers of a lot of Melbourne people. No one wanted him to do that.

Who killed him? Probably the police, either to protect themselves, of Victorian politicians. Google "Operation Briars" and read about the police involvement, attempts to pervert the course of justice, perjury and links to organised crime. Chartres-Abbott's tax records were accessed on April 1, 2003, three months before he was murdered.

Even the police statement about Mark Perry sounds suspect. It seems to be preparing the public for the news that Perry will never be found. My guess is he is already dead. I bet the hooker isn't around either.

Someone wanted this guy dead, and I don't believe it was because he raped a hooker. Something is seriously rotten in the State of Victoria, and it hasn't been uncovered yet.

Tumbling Dice and a Five Year Plan…

2009-10-22T23:12:00.001-07:00

Women think Im tasty, but theyre always tryin to waste me
And make me burn the candle right down,
But baby, baby, I dont need no jewels in my crown.
cause all you women is low down gamblers,
Cheatin like I dont know how,
But baby, baby, theres fever in the funk house now.
This low down bitchin got my poor feet a itchin,
You know you know the duece is still wild.
Baby, I cant stay, you got to roll me
And call me the tumblin dice.

Rolling Stones, 1972, Exile on Main Street.

The story of a gambler who cannot be faithful.

Just like the Union of Soviet Socialist Republics, the bear works on five year plans. Sadly, the plans of men, mice and polar bears seldom manifest themselves in practice. Somewhere in fate, a dice rolls and the plan gets shot to shit, usually within 5 minutes rather than five years.

Long ago a young Bear wanted a job in London. The city was a pretty good place to work at the time. The economy was booming, the music scene was fantastic. The place was booming, and several of the Bears friends were living there. He was sick of driving up for the night, then driving back early the next day. The plan was simple, work in London Monday to Friday, drive up to the country home for the weekend. Easy…

There was a perfect job with a French company, based in London. Bear applied. As the interview was concluding they casually asked "do you speak French".

The Bear lied….

The dice tumbled….

A French guy with an English girlfriend took the London job, and two weeks later I started work in Paris. JC ripped me apart for lying, and told me to learn within 6 weeks. A week later I met P in a bar, and we started screwing. Me physically, her financially.

I moved into her apartment. She spoke little English. We used sign language. 3 months later my French was passable.

A new 5 year plan was developed. One based on P and Paris. My work went well. Globalisation was just starting, and the world spoke English. The EEC was in full swing, Paris was a stylish capital city, and I was frequently back in England anyway. The plan was to ride out P and Paris for 5 years then head back to England.

The dice tumbled again. The French conglomerate closed its expensive Parisian offices. I moved to a small picturesque city in France. P started seeing other guys. My workload increased. I travelled all over Europe . I came to know every good restaurant and bad bar in Europe. A new plan…. I was going to spend 5 years as a jetsetting European junior executive.

The dice tumbled again. Asia became the big economic target. While the average resident of a non-Asian country in 1990 was 72% richer than his parents were in 1960, the corresponding figure for the average Korean was 638%. I found myself flying across Asia, and basing myself in Sydney. One week I had ever meal on an aircraft and only saw a bed twice. Working far from base, I was flying blind, living in hotel rooms. I put a bid together on an old typewriter. I called France several times in the night to get guestimates. The deal was eventually worth US$30 million, and went down at the time as their most profitable ever. From Tokyo to Jakarta, I travelled up and down the timezone. My world was in my filofax – airline tickets, hotel bookings, dairy, contacts, credit cards and money in multiple currencies.

I had another five year plan. It involved cheap bargirls and 747s. I might even still be alive after 5 years.

The dice tumbled again. Demand slumped, the French pulled back. I was posted to Sydney for a year. All of Australia was my backyard, with a bit of Asia where necessary. I found myself living in cheap motels in god awful out the way places.

I had a new plan…

And so it goes on.

I'm writing a new one now. I know full well that it will never see fruition. Not even 10% of it. Some girl in a bar, some global event, some chance meeting, will conspire to stuff it up.

The odd thing is the random effects of the dice. Had I not said I could speak French, I would not be where I am now….

Illegal’s, refugees and bloody migrants make a mess of England

2009-10-22T19:22:00.001-07:00

Under international law, refugees are persons who "owing to well-founded fear of being persecuted for reasons of race, religion, nationality, membership of a particular social group or political opinion, is outside the country of his (sic) nationality and is unable or, owing to such fear, is unwilling to avail himself of the protection of that country ... " (1951 Convention relating to the Status of Refugees)

Abdullah Baybasin arrived in Britain in 1997 and immediately claimed asylum. He is a 35 year old Turk. A refugee. Someone "requiring protection".

Whilst waiting for his refugee status to be approved he became (according to the National Crime Squad) the controller of the lion's share of Britain's heroin trade. Abdullah recruited a gang of young thugs known as the Bombacilar (Bombers) who spread fear throughout the Turkish and Kurdish community. They ran protection rackets, dealt drugs, counterfeited money, and ran prostitution.

Abdullah was sentenced to 22 years jail for drug dealing in 2006 (I HOPE HIS REFUGEE STATUS WAS RECINDED).

His gang carries on its business, even with the boss inside. So much so that Scotland Yard have announced the formation of a new firearms unit that will routinely patrol the Bombacilar heartland in London.

Now here is the laugh: Yasmin Khan, of the Justice4Jean campaign, has said: "This is very disconcerting and worrying and it makes me feel more threatened because we know what the consequences can be of having armed police on the streets.

Yasmin is a bit of a character back in England, because of her ongoing hated of the police. She is the spokeswoman for the Jean De Mendes pressure group.

Here are three simple facts:

If Mendes wasn't in London illegally (he had no visa) then he wouldn't have been shot. Simple fact.
If Abdullah hadn't been given refugee status several people would still be alive today. Simple fact.
If Yasmin or her forefathers had stayed in their third world shithole country London would be a better place. Simple fact.

I am sick of third world trash fucking up my homeland.

Yasmin, if you want to do some good in this world go back to you genetic homeland and spout your crap there. And take your bloody friends with you.

Cultural differences allow you to beat a girl with a metal pole…

2009-10-22T18:37:00.001-07:00

A KOREAN who beat his teenage sister-in-law for not doing homework or running fast enough has avoided jail thanks to cultural differences in discipline. The man was arrested on seven assault charges after striking the girl with a metal pole and a piece of wood. He also threatened to kill the girl by tying her to a boulder and throwing her into a dam.

Judge David Searles described the offences as "horrendous" but because of cultural differences between Korean and Australia, he sentenced the man to a wholly suspended nine months' jail.

NOW JUST HOLD ON A MINUTE……….

As far as I know this is Australia not Korea. Australian law applies here. "Cultural differences" don't matter a squirt of piss on a wet day – we are all equal under the law. Unless you come from somewhere else, when its acceptable to act like an asshole.

Its time crap like this was stamped on. We simply cannot have a set of rules for each ethnic sub culture within this country. What next? Judge David Searles saying "normally cannibalism is frowned upon in Australia, however given the cultural differences I will allow the accused to finish eating his wife and children".