Master Of My Own Thin Frame

It's been FOREVER

2008-06-22T21:24:00.002-04:00

I hate that I don't get to post frequently anymore. I've been so out of touch.

I've had mucho health problems over the past few months, and right now I am currently prepping for a *cough cough* colonoscopy tomorrow. OH THE HUMANITY. It has not been a pleasant prep... but I will be thankful when it is over tomorrow. I'm just looking forward to the happy drugs that will knock me out... and make me feel like I'm not really caring about anything at all. :o) Yeah... it's the little things.

I will update after my procedure and decide from there which way my weight loss adventure will be heading.

Jillian Michaels Kicked My Ass.

2008-02-28T23:29:00.003-05:00

Well.... I did it. I got off my tush and worked out.
And what did I pick? Cripes. It hurts to type it.

Jillian Michaels (from Biggest Loser) "The Biggest Winner" Shape Up - Front

Ouch. It was TOUGH. But... I did it. That's all that matters.
I don't even know how long the workout is. It was very intense, though. I can't wait for my chest to get a little smaller... it will make those jumping jacks so much more pleasant.

Here is the workout schedule I made for the next few weeks:

THU - SHAPE UP FRONT (JILLIAN MICHAELS)
FRI - TURBO JAM 20 MIN
SAT - SHAPE UP BACKSIDE
SUN - REST
MON - SHAPE UP - FRONT
TUE - TURBO JAM 20 MIN
WED - SHAPE UP BACK
THU - MAXIMUM CARDIO BURN (THE FIRM)
FRI - SHAPE UP FRONT
SAT - REST
SUN - REST
MON - SHAPE UP BACK
TUE - MAXIMUM CARDIO BURN
WED - MAXIMIZE FULL FRONTAL (JILLIAN MICHAELS)
THU - TURBO JAM 20 MIN
FRI - MAXIMIZE BACK IN ACTION
SAT - REST
SUN - REST
MON - FULL FRONTAL
TUE - MAX CARDIO BURN
WED - BACK IN ACTION
THU - TURBO JAM 20 MIN
FRI - FULL FRONTAL *START PHASE 3 OR REDO PHASE 1 DEPENDING ON RESULTS*
SAT - TURBO JAM 20 MIN
*FINAL PUSH FOR UPCOMING BIG EVENT*
SUN - BACK IN ACTION
MON - MAX CARDIO BURN
TUE - SHAPE UP FRONT
WED - MAX CARDIO BURN
THU - SHAPE UP BACK
FRI - REST DAY
SAT - REST DAY

I know it seems kind of ambitious... but I feel that the Jillian Michaels workouts will build strength quickly as long as I stick with them. Once this first month is over, I will be switching over to 3 days cardio and 3 days strength to balance and burn fat. Sometimes when I think about this current schedule, I wonder if it would be smarter for me to put more cardio now to burn fat and then work up the strength training. I will see how the first week or two goes on the weight loss front, and determine from there what the best approach will be.

I'm just really freakin proud of myself for staying with this. I feel great.

Phase One - Results!

2008-02-28T15:06:00.003-05:00

After nine days on Phase One of the Fat Smash Diet, I am thrilled to say I lost a SHITLOAD of weight!! Here are my stats:

Starting weight 2/18/08 - 182 lbs

End of Phase One 2/28/08 - 170 lbs!!!

Total loss for Phase One - 12 lbs !!!!

I ROCKED THAT SHIT.

Here are my measurements:

Please keep in mind that I didn't measure until like the 4th or 5th day when I had already lost like 7 lbs. Starting measurements are listed first, new measurements are second.

It is nice to be in Phase Two - I had Life cereal this morning for breakfast and it was delicious! I had grapes for snack, chili for lunch... and I was amazingly hungry again so guess what I'm having??!! CHEESE. Yeah, that's right baby. CHEESE IS SO DAMN GOOD. I get to have 1oz a day, so I bought these Cracker Barrel 1oz pieces as well as these Cabot 50% less fat individual pieces. Since I was dying for some cheese... I went big and did the Cracker Barrel. lol. I am having it with some more grapes... and I am taking my time on it. It's LOVELY.

For dinner it is a 3oz piece of beef - not sure if I will chop it up or maybe pull out the George Foreman and try that thing out - kind of afraid to do it a new way because I will be so pissed if it gets ruined LOL. I am going to cook up some brown rice in chicken broth, and my frozen stir fry veggies and I am going to eat like a Queen tonight LOL. I feel so devious.

I tell ya, this diet sure has caused me to appreciate food so much more. I made some chili last night, and you know what - suprisingly enough I am not sick of it. This diet makes me feel so good. My best friend started 2 days ago, and she is having a hard time being creative. I rationed out some spices for her because she has none. She needs to go grocery shopping and get herself straight over there. I hope she sticks with it.

Phase One, Day Nine DONE!!!

2008-02-27T19:22:00.002-05:00

I am on my last day of the detox part and I am so thrilled. I haven't officially weighed myself for a complete total on Phase One but I've been sneaking peeks at the scale over the past few days... and measured myself again today. It's incredible. Truly.

I now will move into Phase Two tomorrow, and I am pretty excited. The things I look forward to most??

1oz of cheese daily - I bought some Cracker Barrel pre-sliced 3/4oz pieces.
Cereal for breakfast! I got plain Life and plain Cheerios... it will be decadent!
I can have meat!!! I don't know what I will make tomorrow - I am thinking stir fry with 3-4oz beef or chicken for dinner! I think I can split up the meat over the course of the day. Perhaps I should start out small and see how I tolerate it?

There are some things I have to work on in Phase Two, which lasts three weeks:

Do not ever, ever give into a craving for Oreo Cakesters again. I don't remember if I blogged about that experience.. but it was HORRIBLE.
Eat more consistently during the day to prevent mid-day headaches.
Don't be afraid to try new recipes.
Exercise, exercise, exercise!!!
Drink enough water!!!

I still have a ways to go before hitting my goal... but this has been an incredible start. Can't wait to weigh in tomorrow morning. I am sooooo close to my first goal!!!!

The Horror That Is Starting Measurements!

2008-02-25T00:09:00.001-05:00

Here are my "starting" stats... should have done them on day one.. but I didn't. I know I have lost 8lbs and counting (maybe more by tomorrow morning WAHOO!) so they were probably higher than this. I know I definitly see a difference in my back/bra line and in my upper abs. Sooo....
Height: 5' 3"
Starting weight: 182
Current weight: 174
Left Bicep: 14"
Right Bicep: 14.25"
Chest: 44" oh the horror
Upper Abs: 41.25"
Waist: 40.25" thanks to jean waist bands blech
Lower Abs: 42.25"
Right Thigh: 23.5"
Left Thigh: 23.5"
Right Calf: 15"
Left Calf: 14.5"

Not too bad but not that good, either. That's the last time I will see these numbers, I promise myself! Onward with Weight Loss Bliss!

Phase One, Day Six

2008-02-24T20:50:00.001-05:00

I am not feeling well today - my daughter has a nasty cold/flu/something and I am getting it I am getting the stuffy nose and headache... and body aches. ARGH! I am supposed to start my workouts tomorrow and ITS.JUST.NOT.FAIR.

What IS fair, though, is that I cheated and snuck a peek at the scale today. You ready for this????........................ 174!!!!! That's 8 FREAKIN POUNDS!!!! I am so thrilled! I have 3 1/2 more days to go. This rocks!!

Unfortunately, because of not feeling well, my diet has stunk today:
Breakfast: banana
Snack: Yogurt
Lunch: Cabbage Soup
Snack: yogurt and banana (boy am I predictable today)
Dinner: leftover steamed asparagus, bowl of Cabbage Soup

I was hoping to feel a little better and make a valiant attempt at kicking the food intake up a notch today but it so didn't happen. Oh well. There is always tomorrow. Just got to keep plugging away here.

Goals

2008-02-24T20:45:00.001-05:00

I've decided that it is time for me to make some mini goals and rewards seeings as I have embarked on this journey to my goal and have stuck with it this time. I have a history of making goals in the past and then never sticking with the diet. So... now that I have been successful and have my motivation hat screwed on straight.... onward with the goals!!!

1st mini goal - 169 lbs
Reward: A few new things for summer!
Not only will this put me back in the 160's... which I have been aiming for for a long time, it will take my BMI out of the obese category and put me in plain old overweight. I was brokenhearted when I went up a BMI category. I will be truly happy to earn my previous health status back.

2nd mini goal - 156 lbs
Reward: Some heavier weights, some new workout videos or join a gym/class.... one of the three
Being in the 150's again will be a pleasure all it's own. I will be in close proximity to my goal - I will have lost half of the weight needed to reach my goal of 130. This will be a huge boost to the motivation and self esteem for achievement.

3rd mini goal - 146 lbs
Reward: Highlights, manicure and pedicure
This is a significant number for me because when I lost all the weight back in 2004/2005, my lowest number on the scale was 147. By reaching 146, I will have blown past my best number from previously! I will have a new personal best.

4th mini goal - 139 lbs
Reward: Some new clothes!!
I can't recall the last time I was in the 130's... it certainly hasn't been for atleast 15 years. This will be huge for me because I am soooo close to my goal. I will have to really buckle down and work hard to achieve my ultimate goal.

5th goal - 130 lbs
Reward: Go to a Red Sox game and sit in really good seats, and a concert of my choosing!
Words can't describe my feelings about this goal.

Day Five, Phase One

2008-02-23T20:12:00.004-05:00

Today was a messed up day schedule-wise, but I stuck with the diet and everything works out well. My daughter woke up this morning and had a fever of 104.8 and we had to make a run to the pediatrician. They say she has the flu, but I am not 100% on that. She doesn't have the intestinal distress associated with the flu. But thankfully she doesn't have strep throat or an ear infection - two things that I got chronically as a child, and often as an adult. So... we're doing a little better I think.

Breakfast: Did not have - was at doctors.
Snack: banana
Lunch: Cabbage Soup - It was really hard to sit at the table and eat lunch with my kids. They were eating peanut butter and jelly.. and one of them was talking to me and breathing peanut butter breath all over me lol... it smelled good, and that sounds really disgusting now that I wrote that down LOL
Snack: Yogurt
Dinner: Left over Hoppin John (did not finish all, there was about a cup) steamed cauliflower with spices and a few squirts of I Cant Believe Its Not Butter Spray, and steamed asparagus with spices on top.
Snack: One crappy Oatmeal Cookie and a few Sweet Potato Fries.

On an experimental note - I cooked up a batch of the Phase 1 oatmeal cookies and sweet potato fries. I was trying to cook ahead because sometimes I don't always have time to cook something so I opt out of having it. Let's just say... I must have done something wrong with those oatmeal cookies. I used the recipe that's on the Fat Smash site and man... it was awful. Possibly it could be because I used this oatmeal I bought back when I was going to try clean eating - it is Old Wessex 5 grain cereal - oats, rye, triticale(?), barley, and golden flax. Crap... now that I look at it... I think I screwed up the Phase One because of this oatmeal. CRAP CRAP CRAP. That's ok I suppose... I'm NOT eating any more of those cookies anyways.

I just tried a bite of the sweet potato fries and they are decent - they for some reason got kind of burnt on the outside - not crispy... just mushy and burned LOL. Oh well. Trial and error. It's fun to experiment though.

I feel really good today. I have to say that in all honesty, after the doctors appointment, I really wanted to stop at McDonalds or Dunkin Donuts and get something for breakfast. I didn't, which is a huge accomplishment for me... but I just hate those cravings. It's not that often that I can talk myself out of the drive through. Fast food is definitly my nemesis. Particulary McDonalds and Burger King. I don't know why... because frankly the food is disgusting and horrible for you. But hell... if I am going to be honest, I might as well just admit it. The Dollar Menu kills me. I overdo it BIG TIME when I eat that stuff. I do the McDonalds thing a LOT when I am stressed. Sometimes several days in a row. How embarrasing is that to admit it??? Ugh. I am just glad I didn't cave today. I really wanted to. I just came home, ate my Cabbage Soup and that was the end of it.

I wrote up a workout schedule for the next four weeks. I am starting on Monday. I would like to get in the habit of working out in the morning before the kids get up. I know that I will have a hard time with this, but hell... if I can stick with this diet for this long and not give up... I CAN work out in the morning. Plus, it will prevent me from making excuses later in the day. I'm real good about making excuses. I do think I should consult a few more fitness magazines, and rework the schedule a little. I know I need a decent amount of cardio... but strength training really helped me before. I want to make sure I am burning off the layer of fat above my muscles so I don't bulk up instead of slim down.

I tell ya... I am feeling really good. I do look forward to getting some meat back in my diet, but I am not totally broken hearted that it is gone right now. The main cravings I've had have been for sugary things like those stupid Oreo Cakesters I bought for the kids. ROAR. Silly, stupid little things like that. So... I have fruit or veggies instead. No big deal, right now. I'm more iterested in finally losing this weight once and for all. I want to get back to where I was before when I was so successful in this journey. I got as low as 147... which I hadn't been for YEARS... and I felt like a million bucks. I wore sleeveless tops and looked people in the eye. I miss that. I want that feeling back again. I can do this.

Phase One, Day Four

2008-02-22T20:37:00.002-05:00

Well, I am kind of dissapointed. My best friend was supposed to start the diet yesterday, but she totally gave in to temptation before the day was over. Her excuse? A neighbor sent over a dinner plate because they knew she was starting to get a cold and didn't feel that great. I was on the phone with her when she got the plate, and it was a cheeseburger. I was wicked jealous.... but it passed quickly because I want this SO BAD. Now she has a cold, and said she has to wait until it's gone before she starts the diet. That's fine... if she isn't ready, she isn't. I just wish I had someone to talk to about this in my real life.

Todays Menu
Breakfast: 4 egg whites cooked in PAM with Mrs Dash Salt Free Seasoning
Snack: Banana and yogurt
Lunch: Bowl of Cabbage Soup
Snack: Yogurt
Dinner: "Hoppin John" with added veggies
Optional Third Snack - who knows.. I find myself snacking at night and its truly a problem. I know it's healthy foods and all but I really need to watch it.

Today is ok. I find that I am pretty hungry, and it's fairly often. Every two hours I suppose, but it certainly feels like I am eating too much (or too often). I don't eat until I am stuffed... and when I do eat I find that it doesn't take much to make me full. I need to concentrate more on drinking my water - although it was ticking me off all the times I woke up last night to piddle. So, overall impressions are - I get full on little food but get hungry more often. What the....?

I have neglected you, oh lovely blog.

2008-02-21T23:34:00.003-05:00

I'm so sorry, Blog. I have been cheating on you. It's not you, it's me. Really. I swear.

In all honesty, I have actually been *gasp* Following A Diet. I know. Be still my beating heart. I just completed Day Three of the first phase of the Fat Smash Diet. It hasn't been the easiest, but it also hasn't been the most difficult thing I've done. I've actually cooked some decent meals on this diet. I borrowed some books on Vegetarian cooking from the library today. I'm really excited about this diet. It's truly amazing.

My brother tried this diet before and had good success with it... while he stayed on it. He and I are very similar in the fact that we have an issue with consistency. He decided to start this diet again, and I got inspired to try it. So, here I am.

The first phase is 9 days long, and consists of a detox diet. No white flour (bread, pasta, rice) only brown rice. All veggies except for potatoes, all fruit, lots of beans for protein. After 9 days, you slowly add things back in like meats (3-4 ounces a day) and cereals (whole grain, smart choices), flavored drinks, sugar (very little) and my favorite - CHEESE! I'm sure once the 9 days are over, I will drool on myself when I finally get to have some meat. I just have to learn not to overdo it. I want to be slender SO.DAMN.BAD. I am really proud of myself for doing this. It's about time that something gave around here.

I started the diet first, and since the kids are on vacation this week... I did not start exercising yet. I was talking with my girls tonight and they said it was okay if I did exercise videos. This is coming from two 5-year-olds. Cute, right? My one daughter said, "It's ok Momma, we can play in our room." Awww, why thank you baby. Mucho kisses for you!! I could probably manage a strength training workout, but I don't know if they have the attention span to play in their room for an hour without interrupting me or getting into a fight. It's a lovely thought, though.

I bought Jillian Michael's "The Biggest Winner" workouts. I love Jillian, and I so want to be her when I grow up. She is so inspirational to me. I trust that her workouts work, so I bought them and I will start them this coming week. It's going to be tough, no doubt, but I know darn well that I will get great results and it will only boost my current diet efforts. I'm excited.

So, that's where I am at right now. I have a few things on my To-Do list.

Construct workout rotation
Scout great vegetarian recipes
Faithfully blog and journal (at the Fat Smash Forum) my daily food and exercise
Type up diet information for my best friend who is also trying diet

I think that's good for now. That's the extent of my To-Do list, regarding my diet anyways. I have a whole boat load of personal life T-Do's. Ho hum. That's a whole 'nother can of worms lol.

This is great.

2008-02-11T13:15:00.002-05:00

When I get married, I am soooo going to do something like this.

Lead Belly and other oddities.

2008-02-08T08:42:00.001-05:00

I slept terrible last night. I'm not quite sure what it was - perhaps the stupid frozen pizza I gorged myself on before bed - but it felt like I had ten pounds of lead in my upper abdomen all night long. It was terribly uncomfortable. I'm pretty sure I learned a lesson about late night eating. It's time to kick that bad habit. I am a habitual nail biter as well... and have only ceased biting them for short stretches of time - six months being the longest (and man did my nails look beautiful). I thought I Learned A Lesson before on that front too - I decided after literally injuring myself so where it hurt to touch things with my fingers that it would behoove me to just Stop Doing That. I did fine for those 6 months, and then as soon as I started talking to my ex on the phone again POOF! There goes the beautiful nails. I really need to cut that out.

So, I decided to weigh myself this morning because I was interested to know just how heavy my Lead Belly was. I am shocked... I was 176 last week (with a visit from Aunt Flo) and this morning I was 172.5 Interesting. I'll take it. I need to get out of the 170's. They depress me. Ideally, I would kill to be 150 for my court date next month but I know damn well that this will not happen. Too much weight to lose in a short amount of time. I'd love to be out of the 160's though, so if I put my all into it... perhaps, just perhaps... it might be possible.

I am a terrible procrastinator. I am notorious for waiting until the last minute to do things. I could have been doing the whole diet and exercise thing for the past what.... YEAR... and probably would be close to my goal by now instead of close to getting out of the Obese BMI category. Blah. Hindsight is 20/20 my friends.

I had lost the remote control for my DVD player a few weeks ago, and was ticked to find that I could not use my workout DVDs that have a menu because well.... no way to navigate the menu. It pissed me off royally. I finally had some extra cash so I got me one of those fancy Universal Remotes and whalla!!! MENU NAVIGATION! Forgot to buy a can of Motivation while I was out, though. Note to self - motivation is just as important as toilet paper. Must. Get. Some.

I sooo want to be smokin hot.

Accountability is not my dieting strength.

2008-02-05T19:54:00.001-05:00

Ok fine... neither is motivation, excitement, or actually getting it done. It's sad, really. I had one of those Big Important Dates to lose weight for - a court hearing with my ex regarding child support. They say the best revenge is living well... and looking good. I haven't been living well lately, and haven't looked good in a while. I really wanted to have atleast one duck in a row. No such luck, unless I partake in the Grapefruit Diet or the Lemonade Diet or the Hollywood Starvation Diet for the next month and a half. Healthy? No. Desperate? Of course! My specialty.

Dieting is not going good, but college is. I haven't really mentioned it on here before but I suppose now is a good time because it is the one major positive thing I've accomplished in the past few months. This is my second year attending, and I go half time... finishing core classes so I can apply to a program. I still have this desire to go for Nursing, but the math kills me. I thought Massage Therapy would be good, but have doubts about it because it won't make the money of a Nursing position. Who knows. I still have time to figure it out. I have a few more classes to get out of the way first. Anyways, so I made the Dean's List last semester and was offered the opportunity to apply for a scholarship. I think that is wicked cool, and hope I get the chance to have one. It would help out tremendously.

Totally unrelated - Happy Super Tuesday everyone. I hope Mike Huckabee wins.

The most amazing thing.

2008-01-08T09:46:00.001-05:00

Yeah, I know. Not suposed to take weight loss pills because *cough cough* they just don't work. Well, something in this pill that I am taking is working because my appetite is decreased, and I have lost several pounds now without exercising. Hmmmm. What's up with THAT?!?

I started taking VPX Meltdown about a week ago, and my starting weight was 179. I am 171 this morning. It's a strange and wonderful thing. I have not been jittery or "caffiened out" like other pills I have taken. It's pretty nice. I am starting this morning to couple it with the load of SlimFast drinks in my fridge to see how far I can go. I am going to add 3 days of exercise this week now that I am over the respiratory infection from hell. Yay, I can speak without coughing!!! ***happy dance***

So, I have one HUGE upcoming event to lose this weight for. March 28th is my court date with my ex to increase the child support. He left us in the middle of the night in June 2006, and has been living the single life in Florida since then. He has popped in and out of our lives twice since then... each time promising to the children a reconciliation and relocation to Florida to "be a family again". Both times, I found out the hard way that he was lying about it all... and totally crushing the kids. He has gone long periods of time without calling (once was 6 months, and now he hasn't called since September) so I am sure you can imagine how my 5 yr olds feel. The last time he was calling us, he was bragging about a raise (he works for his parents) and went on and on and on about qualifying for a $35,000 loan for a new Volkswagen car. Nice, right? But he couldn't send any extra cash for school clothes, didn't send any birthday presents for the girls in September, and didn't even call or send anything for Christmas. Total prick. That's ok - I worked my ass off to provide what they needed. It just makes him look like a complete asshole.

Anyways. So, I am assuming that he will be present for this hearing - and I want to look fabulous. Smokin hot. Not so he will want me, but because it will give me more confidence. I need that high self esteem so that I can march in there and keep my chin up. I know losing weight is not the only thing that will help me to achieve this - I have been seeing a counselor and we will start working on this in the next few weeks. But, truly.... I want to look smokin hot. SMOKIN.

I cheated.

2007-12-18T15:17:00.001-05:00

I finally bought new batteries for the scale today... so I just HAD to jump on and make sure it was working correctly.
Drum roll please....

12/10/07 - 181 lbs
12/18/07 - 176.5 lbs!!!
AND I HAVE MY PERIOD!!!!

I'm so happy I could eat a wheelbarrel full of raw veggies LOL.

Week Two - Great start!

2007-12-17T12:39:00.000-05:00

Todays 20 minute workout was great. I still used modifications and kept it low impact on some stuff, but I definitly feel a difference in my abilities. Just have to retrain my body in order to regain my level of fitness from before.

I think I will stay with the Turbo Jam for this month, and then consider working in some of the Firm videos that are collecting dust. I also have to figure out where to put my I Want That Body series with Tamilee Webb. That woman is AWESOME. Difficult, but awesome.

I busted my ass three times this week shoveling. Even though it was fluffy snow, there was a lot of it, and when the plow comes by they pack the snow which makes it SO HEAVY. I feel good about the amount of cardio I got from that - cripes, I was outside for 4 hours yesterday... that has got to count for something!

I was all gung ho about making goals for myself last week. I kind of wrote down some goals, but I really need to focus on weekly goals, monthly goals and then rewards. I haven't been able to judge any weight loss so far because I have not stepped back on the scale. I can get kind of obsessive sometimes with that. I think it will be neat to check in one month - although if nothing changes I am going to be irritated LOL. I know, I will measure too... but still. I really would like a lower number on the scale.

I think that is it for today. Gotta take a shower and pick the kids up from school soon. :o)

Friggin Snow.

2007-12-16T15:18:00.000-05:00

Last Thursday, I had the 20 min workout scheduled and it didn't end up happening because we got dumped on with a foot of snow. I know, sounds like a lame excuse. I dropped my kids off at school and went right downstairs to their Holiday Shop - a "store" where kids can come and purchase gifts for family members.I volunteered Wednesday and Thursday. I stayed until 10:30am, and then had to rush over to the Super Walmart to get groceries before the snow started. I walked out of there at 11:30 and it was already coming down hard. I picked the kids up from school (early dismissal) and we headed home. I shoveled that night, and then again a lot in the morning. Friday was the day from hell on the home front due to extremely obnoxious 3rd floor neighbors. Yesterday I went to a Christmas party with my brother and got hammered on Appletini's. It was open bar, and I REALLY took advantage. Today I spent four hours shoveling again, and have had a decent eating day. Certainly not ideal, but better than usual.

Monday starts tomorrow, and it is back to the rotation. This week I have the following planned:
Mon - 20 min
Tue - 20 min, Ab Jam
Wed - Cardio Party (this video intimidates me)
Thu - 20 min, Ab Jam
Fri - 20 min
Sat & Sun - rest days

I WILL do all workouts this week. I will make better choices with food. I will not step on the scale this week. I will continue to drink as many of the 8 glasses of H2O that I can handle. I will start using protein drinks, the vitamin supplements I have, and the flaxseed. When I go grocery shopping this week, I will take my time instead of just shoving things in my cart. I will make meal plans for the next week or two so I can have easy healthy meals for me, as well as wholesome tolerable foods for my twins. I will. I will. I will.

Ride That Train.

2007-12-12T12:44:00.000-05:00

I completed workout day #3, and I ROCKED THAT SHIT.
I have 25 days left, and 23 workouts to go.

I moved on from Turbo Jam Learn & Burn to the 20 minute workout, and I think I did great! I was pretty winded at one point, so I took it down a notch and followed the modified version. I kept going, and that's what matters most. One more workout this week and then 3 rest days. I'm thinking about finding a Yoga video to do for stretching. I think that might be good for rest days.

Diet has been decent, but certainly not perfect. I have succeeded in cutting back on the food I eat and making better choices, but I certainly am not eating clean or anything. Last night, I had maybe 6 ounces of pork chop, and a cold pasta salad made with whole wheat pasta, chopped cucumber, tomato and green pepper... topped with a little bit of shredded cheese and fat free Italian dressing. It was really good. I didn't overdo it, which is good.

I need to plan my food better. I keep reading that it is better to eat a big breakfast, a medium lunch and a light dinner. I am making a goal for this month to not eat after 6pm. That reminds me... I haven't put up any goals!

Developing a habit... hopefully.

2007-12-11T11:43:00.000-05:00

I completed workout day #2, and it was GOOD.
I have 26 days left, and 24 workouts to go.

I only did the Burn section of Learn & Burn because well... I already know the moves. I gave it a really good effort, and only got out of rhythm once. I can't wait to do the 20 minute workout tomorrow. I love that one. Even in the video from today, I was smiling like a fool. I don't know what it is about these workouts. I love music, especially dance music, and there are some pretty good songs in Turbo Jam. Plus you have the option to pump up the music over the instructor... so I turn the tunes up way loud and just GROOVE. It's so much fun.

Eating is ok today.
Breakfast : half of a banana (must work on breakfast)
Lunch : 2-3 cups salad greens, 1/2 cucumber, 3 oz chicken, 2 tbsp fat free ranch dressing and 2 tbsp shredded cheese. Good salad.

The Plan

2007-12-11T09:51:00.000-05:00

Today I am just going to do Learn and Burn again... following the beginner rotation. I look forward to it.

Diet yesterday was decent,,, could have been better. I've been reading the book by Jillians Michaels (biggest loser scary trainer) and it had a formula on there to determine your daily needs on calories.

For women:
To find your basal metabolic rate (daily calories burned with the least amount of activity possible, only calories burnt while the body does normal functions like digestion, breathing, cell repair)
655 + (4.3 x weight in pounds) + (4.7 x height in inches) - (4.7 x age in years) = BMR.

Then, once you find this number, you figure out your activity level (before working out).
Sedentary lifestyle, multiple BMR by 1.1
Light physical activity, multiply BMR by 1.2
Moderate physical activity, multiply BMR by 1.3
and High physical activity - multiply BMR by 1.4

Then, once you get this number, you add how many calories you burn on an average day through exercise.. Once added all together, this is your active metabolic rate. When you multiply this by 7, this is how many calories you need each week in order to maintain your weight. Subtract 3500 calories from that to lose one pound. 7000- for two pounds.

This is mine:
665 + 778 + 296 - 132 = 1607
Then I have a light physical activity lifestyle, so I multiply by 1.2
1607 x 1.2 = 1928
I add about 350 calories burned daily (estimate) and I get 2278.
2278 x 7 days a week = 15,946
I want to lose 1.5 pounds. The way I calculated was I subtract 3500 calories from the total, giving me 12,446. Then another half of a pound is equal to 1750 calories.
12,446 - 1750 = 10,696
To see this is a 7 day week, my total calories needed each day is 1528. Pretty amazing. I know I was losing a good amount of weight before, and I never brought my calories down to 1200.
If I wanted to lose 2 lbs a week, I would have a weekly total of 8946, or a daily total of 1278. Not really my ideal. It also doesn't leave much room to shake up your metabolism.

In this book I am reading, it states that in order to keep your metabolism revved, you have to eat different amounts of calories each day.Since I want to lose atleast 1.5 lbs a week... but closer to two, I have developed this system:

Mon - 1300 calories
Tue - 1500 calories
Wed - 1300 calories
Thu - 1600 calories
Fri - 1300 calories
Sat - 1400 calories
Sun - 1700 calories
Total: 10,100 weekly, shaving off another 596 almost 600 calories from my total.

I think this will be pretty effective because, if any of you have noticed in the past... you'll do real good for a while with weight loss. Then the week you feel you did bad on food, you actually lose quite a bit... even for the next week or two. I totally believe that we can kick our metabolism into gear by switching it up. I'm going to try it!

Baby steps.

2007-12-10T14:10:00.000-05:00

I completed workout day #1 and it was good.
I have 27 days left, and 25 workouts to go.

With the Turbo Jam workouts, you can log into Million Dollar Body and use the WOWY system, which is Work Out With You. They have Beach Body workouts programmed into the site, and it gives you a period of time to complete your workout. You are online logged in with many other people, all working out together. Pretty neat, I think.

Food has been good - am hoping to keep the trend going for the est of today.

I have to work on getting enough water today.

December stats

2007-12-10T11:37:00.001-05:00

How many times do I have to do starting stats? For the love of God, already.

Height: 5'3"
Weight: 181
Chest: 44.5
Waist: 41.5
Hips: 42.5
Upper abs: 42.5
Right mid-thigh: 24
Left mid-thigh: 24
Right upper arm: 13.5
Left upper arm: 13

And now, a video from YouTube. It just goes to show how manipulated our sense of beauty can get. These are plus sized models, and through the glory of Paint Shop, they now have thin bodies and look fabulous.

Someone buy me Paint Shop for Christmas, please.
Please please please please please.

Turbo Jam revisited.

2007-12-10T11:20:00.000-05:00

I reordered Turbo Jam a few weeks ago, and finally recieved it last week. I've got to do something, and so this is what I am going to do. Enough is enough. I was laughed at in Walmart over the weekend, and I really think that this is the breaking point. I reached one previously in my life, and lost 70+ pounds afterwards. I really pray that this is the one experience that pushes me to my goal.

Rotation for the month:

Day 1: Learn & burn
Day 2: Learn & Burn
Day 3: 20 min
Day 4: 20 min
Day 5: rest
Day 6: rest
Day 7: Rest
Day 8: 20 min
Day 9: 20 min, Ab Jam
Day 10: Cardio Party
Day 11: 20 min, Ab Jam
Day 12: 20 min
Day 13: Rest
Day 14: Rest
Day 15: 20 min, Ab Jam
Day 16: Cardio Party
Day 17: Turbo Sculpt, Ab Jam
Day 18: Cardio Party
Day 19: 20 min, Ab Jam
Day 20: Rest
Day 21: Rest
Day 22: Cardio Party
Day 23: Turbo Sculpt, Ab Jam
Day 24: 20 min
Day 25: Cardio Party
Day 26: Turbo Sculpt, Ab Jam
Day 27: Rest
Day 28: Rest

Then I will re-assess my progress and decide from there if I will continue with Turbo Jam only, or add in a mix of the other workout videos I have. I am posting my starting stats next.

Things I Have Learned Today

2007-10-01T13:33:00.001-04:00

Starting weight: 167 (YAY back out of "obese" category!!!)
Lifestyle change: Eat Clean Diet

Things I Have Learned Today

1. Oatmeal that you cook on the stove instead of the microwave is pretty nasty. Oatmeal without any added flavoring and sugars is REALLY nasty.

2. It doesn't matter how much fresh fruit you add, regular oatmeal still sucks the big one.

3. I still don't like tuna fish, or any fish for that matter, no matter how pretty it looks on a bed of leafy greens.

4. I made my first protein shake today, and I have no idea what I am doing.

5. Protein shakes make me want to crawl into a hole and die.

I have several hours left in the day, and one more new appliance left to try out. Yesterday I bought a personal sized blender (for disgusting protein shakes) and a rice cooker/vegetable steamer. I wonder what mayhem I will cause with the steamer.

Food For Today
Breakfast:
1 cup cooked oatmeal with 1 tbsp each wheat germ and flaxseed on top
1/2 cup mixed berries on oatmeal (strawberries, blueberries, raspberries)
4 scrambled egg whites
500 mL H2O

Snack:
1 medium apple
1 tbsp almond butter
500 mL H2O

Lunch:
1 can packed in water tuna
1.5 cups salad greens
1 cup mixed veggies (tomato, cucumber, green pepper, carrot and pickle)
Still working on that 500 mL H2O

Snack:
Protein shake *barf*
1 scoup whey protein powder, 1 cup skim milk, 3 ice cubes, one banana sliced, 1 tbsp each wheat germ, flaxseed and bee pollen)

Dinner:
To be determined... thinking chicken, steamed veggie of some sort and maybe brown rice? I might not try and make two different things in the new steamer. Too much room for error.

The best thing about today - starting on a new adventure, have a little more energy, I like my new appliances, the GNC guy talked to me like an educated adult instead of a moronic child and I got the card for a woman who is a Reiki master. BONUS. I may have to take one of her classes soon. I also got some essential oils, and they smell yummy. :o)

Completely sobering.

2007-09-25T23:11:00.001-04:00

Here I am, updating my blog stats, when all of a sudden I realize the most disturbing thing.

I recalculated my BMI according to the weigh-in from this morning. I am back to the obese category in BMI.

Horrifying. Completely and utterly horrifying.

This is my official wake up call. Ok, Fat Gods... I hear you. I got the memo this time. That's a big 10-4 from me.

My lowest weight was this time last year - 147. I have gained 20 pounds in a year. I am so angry at myself I could spit fire.

20 fucking pounds.

I've been all content and pleased with myself for the past few days because I made some career/school decisions that will lead me down a different path than what I originally planned. I started school last year with the intentions of going for Nursing. The more I have considered things - my interests, the examples of other successful people, the pure difficulty of becoming a nurse - I have chosen a different path. I choose Alternative Medicine, specifically Massage Therapy with a focus on alternative therapies like homeopathy, naturopathy, aromatherapy, and an assortment of random practices and therapies.

I originally began considering this path a few months back. I started reading books, talking to people and toying with the idea of changing focus. How I officially came around to this decision is kind of random and silly - I went to the gym for the first time with my brother. I used a treadmill and elliptical for the first time. I LOVED the gym atmosphere, way more than I ever thought possible. I started reading more hardcore fitness magazines like Women's Health and Oxygen. I crave a gym membership like you wouldn't believe. I wish my brother would invite me for another trip.

I looked through the magazines and saw all of these women participating in fitness contests. Underneath their names were listings for occupations. Personal Trainer was a popular one. I have this insane desire to be a personal trainer. A fitness instructor. Someone fit, knowledgable and healthy. I want to participate in marathons. I want to run instead of walk in a cancer fundraising event. I want to run, period.

I want to eat clean. I want to eat organic. I want to eat healthy. I don't want to battle with food any more.

And I want my BMI back.

I hear you, Fat Gods. I really, really do.