Inside the mind of PFritz21

Well, there's your problem

2008-09-02T20:47:00.002-05:00

They had it up until the point that Amber and James were crying.

Rena's discovery and Lawrence's past were not forced in; I felt they fit in nicely into the story.

We're #1

2008-08-24T22:07:00.006-05:00

Final Score:

United States of America - 110
People's Republic of China - 100*

*NOTE: Until proven beyond a doubt that those gymnasts were all of legal competitve age.

2008-08-20T22:15:00.002-05:00

I bet the Janitor's name is John Dorian. Wouldn't that be ironic?

If you're curious, I'm willing to wager a five-spot on it.

Oh, it's on!

2008-08-16T11:47:00.003-05:00

Unfortunately, I don't get G4 on basic cable in Fargo. Such a disappointment, 'cuz I'm really missing out.

G4 has X-Play, featuring the lovely Morgan Webb. Queen of all the geeks... until now...

Olivia Munn has two things going for her where she's got Morgan beat.

1. Morgan is married. Olivia is single.
2. This!

There is only one way to settle this battle for supremacy. It involves one member of the Spirit Squad, a set of children's golf clubs, a Nerf football, Peter Pan chunky extra crispy peanut butter, and a Waffle House omelette. YOU figure that one out.

Well played, clerks...

2008-08-15T21:19:00.003-05:00

So, people in the present who are looking to obtain a time machine will sometimes resort to leaving messages for future generations to be a time-space location (be at location A at time X), then wait for someone with a time machine to travel back to time X in an effort to steal said time machine.

Still with me? Good.

However, it hasn't worked (so far, to my knowledge). But I think I know how to fix that.

I have to cause an event that makes it necessary for someone in the future to travel back in time to ensure that I cause my event, or else that time traveler will not exist as he does in the future.

Hunh?

I do event A. A causes event B. B causes event C. C directly effects time travel T in a profound manner, so much so that T comes back in time to when I do event A, to make sure event A happens.

T shows up in my time, I beat his ass, and then I take his time machine.

Now, to determine what I do that direct effects T... Anyone got a time machine?

Welcome to Cooperstown

2008-08-13T22:13:00.004-05:00

Jim Edmonds: amazing center field defense, World Series ring, AND 378 home runs? If he can make it to 400 (he turned 38 less than two months ago), I say let him in. I don't see how you can argue with that.

2008-08-08T23:11:00.002-05:00

This is why you have to close the borders...

Mexican cartels grow pot in U.S. national forests

You don't have to be a recovering alcoholic rodeo clown to realize this...

Does that count?

2008-08-06T18:35:00.002-05:00

Does this whole Brett Farve drama thing qualify as a Madden curse victim?

2008-08-02T11:10:00.002-05:00

"The moment you stop learning to play golf is the moment you stop playing golf." - Jeff Kennedy, 7/17/08

I don't know if that's an original Jeff Kennedy quote, but it sure sounded good.

2008-07-16T20:02:00.000-05:00

This is why I love Ice-T as a cop. He's just so damn good...

More like "how do they know?"

2008-07-13T09:56:00.003-05:00

I was bored this morning, so I went to Wikipedia and saw this in the "Did you know" section:

"The red-purple coloured inedible mushroom Russula sardonia has a hot peppery taste"

Well, if the Russula sardonia mushroom is inedible, then how do you know what it tastes like? More importantly, who's the idiot that goes around eating inedible mushrooms so they can catalogue that data in Wikipedia?

2008-07-09T21:40:00.003-05:00

I still think it's a fluke. Only 3 back with 70 to go? No way that should have happened.

But Minnesota got lucky. Cleveland is playing like crap (and have essentially given up by trading C.C. Sabathia). Detroit might finally be getting on track. Chicago is playing out of their mind, but with Ozzie at the helm, it could all go down the crapper in an instant.

However, I'm willing to admit, the Twins MIGHT not be half-bad. And if they finish the season with a winning record, I'll say it. I was wrong. In fact, I kinda do want to see them succeed, so I'd be a man about it and tell people that I was wrong.

Search you feelings, you will know it to be true...

2008-06-30T17:51:00.004-05:00

It's bad enough that Luke Skywalker converted to The Dark Side. Now Han Solo is thinking about it too?

Who's next? Princess Leia?

Ooh, shiney...

2008-06-22T22:59:00.002-05:00

Leonard, you have excellent taste in women. I can't blame you for taking an interest in her. Beautiful, nice, sweet, amazing, fun. I tip my hat to you, sir.

I hope to one day find my shiny Penny...

From the "So bad, it's good" category...

2008-05-11T13:42:00.001-05:00

Fall Out Boy's cover of Michael Jackson's "Beat It".

Bonus points for the cameo by Donald Faison.

Are you mad?

2008-04-22T19:25:00.003-05:00

I've always said the worst thing any human being could ever do was attempt to produce a big-budget remake of or sequel to Ferris Bueller's Day Off. It would drive this country to civil war.

But a remake or sequel of WarGames would be almost as bad...

YOU GO GIRL!!

2008-04-19T23:09:00.002-05:00

Congratulations to Danica Patrick, winner of the Indy Japan 300 at Twin Rings Motegi.

I hope it's the first of many, Danica.

My future's so bright, I gotta wear shades...

2008-04-19T17:36:00.002-05:00

I don't know what I'm looking forward to most the last week of April, moving in my new apartment or Mario Kart Wii...

Rock chalk jayhawk

2008-04-07T23:05:00.001-05:00

Congratulations to the 2008 NCAA Men's Basketball National Champions, The University of Kansas Jayhawks.

PFritz21.NET MFFA AP/Coaches Poll

2008-03-25T00:07:00.002-05:00

Note: First-place votes are listed in parentheses:

1. Travis (2)
2. Chris (1)
3t. Greg
3t. Jeff
5. Vern

Others receiving votes: Glenn, Duane, Clint

Far beyond gone

2008-01-18T20:31:00.000-06:00

How did I get here, and what went wrong?

I guess it started after I turned 11 and started paying attention to girls. For almost 16 years, I've been obsessing about finding one. Like my life is going to be incomplete without finding that one special person. It's the only thing I want right now. I'm miserable. Finding someone will make me happy. I'm absolutely, positively guaranteed of it.

I thought I found her too. How could I be such an idiot and let a stupid little thing like religion stop us from being together...?

And everyone else knows it too. Friends, family members, co-workers. "You need a woman." Yeah, duh. Wish they'd actually do something about it. They talk about hooking me up, but I don't get no love.

Yet they also keep telling me "you're going to find her when you least expect, when you're not looking for her." I'm sorry, but that just doesn't make any sense to me. You find things be LOOKING for them. You just don't sit around and wait for things to find you. And it's easy for them to say that; they're done searching.

North Dakota isn't the best place to search. People seem to find each other at a younger age. Get married young, start families young, break up young (I want to avoid baggage like ex's and kids, if at all possible...). I need to get out of Dodge...

I'm tired of seeing couples everywhere I look. Even it would only be for one day, I want to connect with someone, be with someone, be there for someone.

It'd be so much easier if women were property. I'm not saying that they should be, but if they were, all I'd have to do is buy one. I can buy things. But not happiness...

Jump in the water
Jump in with me
Jump on the altar
Lay down with me

My hardest question
To answer is
WHY?!

WHY!!!!!

Someone save me if you will
And take away all these pills
And please just save me, if you can
From the blasphemy in my wasteland

Some one save me
Some one save me
Some one save me
Somebody save me
Somebody save me
Please don't erase me
- Save Me, Shinedown

Truer words have never been spoken

2008-01-06T11:16:00.000-06:00

"I don't need to manage my anger, I need people to stop ticking me off!" - Red Green

You're a mean one, Mr. Grinch...

2007-12-26T19:10:00.000-06:00

I hate Christmas. Thank god it's almost over.

From the constant Christmas-themed craptastic marathons to the crazy busy stores to the unnecessarily cheery people... I just can't stand it. I wish everyone would treat it like it was any other day and not make a big deal about it.

Not to mention that it totally fucks with my birthday (the 29th). NO ONE is ever around to come celebrate with me. Thanks mom, thanks dad. I hope that tax break was worth the pain and suffering you've caused me for the past 27 years, and the next 50 as well.

That being said, there are a few things I DO like about Christmas.

1. Carol of the Bells - What other Christmas carol could be described as intense? Those Eastern Europeans sure do know how to write a catchy little ditty.
2. Santa hats - Almost all hats are cool. Unless they have a white "NY" logo on them. If only Target would have had them in stock.
3. Time off from work. I get two days for Christmas. Unfortunately, almost all other John Deere factories and offices are closed for the entire week.
4. Bonus money. Got $2400 this year. Then Uncle Sam decided that I needed to get him a birthday present. Spend it wisely... oh wait, I forgot, the Democrats are in Congress. That ain't gonna happen.

Even in this joyous season, I can find plenty to complain about. Maybe I should start celebrating Festivus instead. I already got the Airing of Grievances down. Just have to pin Frank for the Feats of Strength...

Somewhere I Belong

2007-12-14T18:30:00.000-06:00

You know, it's weird. I've been playing World of Warcraft off and on for the past two years now, and it seems like Azeroth is the only place where I've felt like I truly belonged.

My buddies Vern and Jared had talked me into joining them in Azeroth, and as soon as I had started, I was invited to The Wolves of Azeroth. No questions asked. Ard and Cith were glad to have me as a member. And as the months progressed, everyone in The Wolves were more than willing to help me out with anything and everything (except, of course, RUNNING the guild, but that's another story...).

It's still a little weird to be back with none of them around. But I found some people to latch onto and suck the life out of... I mean, um, hang out with... Lan and Sina are doing their darnest to twink me out so I can play with them on a daily basis. And it's always a ball to talk with them on Vent and listen to them bitch and moan and talk shit to each other. Most fun I've had in ages.

Dynasty will never be like The Wolves. But I think I'm finally somewhere I belong, once again...