Nothing Clears the Mind

An Abundance of Katherines

2008-12-10T06:47:00.000-08:00

I read John Green's blog and find him charming and funny in that dorky way I admire oh so much, so when I found "An Abundance of Katherines" at Bookpeople for just $3.99 I snatched it right up. So glad I did.

At first the narrator (an 18 yr old child prodigy) really bugged me but he quickly grew on me and then I couldn't put the book down. This is a sweet, satisfying story that I think quite accurately captures the awkwardness and uncertainty of too smart for their own good kids trying to figure out what happens next. Since the narrator's a know it all, it also has lots of fun little tidbits of "huh" including a couple revelations about John's favorite inventor, Philo T. Farnsworth. Definitely worth a read.

Also, this video of John Green sortof conquering his fear of heights is friggin adorable.

Winter Reading

2008-12-07T16:16:00.000-08:00

I've been making a point of going to bed a bit earlier to get in some more reading time and have been really pleased with my recent choices -

Ian Bank's The Crow Road - my most recent Indiespensable delivery turned out to be this amazing book by a very highly acclaimed British author that I'm embarassed to say I'd never heard of. Really intriguing and engaging story with one of the best opening lines in the history of literature ("It was the day my grandmother exploded"). Part coming of age story and part murder mystery, it left me wanting more of all of the main characters. I'm already planning to read it again to catch all of the clues and intricacies I missed the first time.

And on completely the other side of the coming of age spectrum, Libba Bray's A Great and Terrible Beauty. A fun and easy read chock-full of strong female characters. Setting the book in 19th century England boarding school offered some interesting perspectives about what it meant to be a girl/woman at the turn of the century. There's certainly some cheesiness and the plot's pretty convaluted at times, but the author really captures the unique struggles of female friendships. I randomly picked this one up off of the shelf at Bookpeople cause it was a staff pick and only found out AFTER reading that it's a trilogy. I'm curious enough to at least give the next one a try and I think this could be a nice counter balance to the pining of the Twilight series.

Finally, for something completely different - Freakonomics. This one was John's suggestion and I must say I was pleasantly surprised. Economics (math) isn't really my thing, but the use of engaging examples to answer life's random questions really drew me in. I can't really speak to the accuracy of any of the arguments (I think there's been some debunking, and several of the concepts are pretty radical), but I do find myself considering the "why's" of things a bit differently, which I think is a good thing.

Quick Update

2008-11-26T10:58:00.000-08:00

I keep reading that personal blogging is dead. Given that it's been more than a month since I posted, maybe so...

It's not that things aren't happening, cause they are. There was meeting the Governor and getting to start at the very front at the Race for the Cure, and lots and lots of other running, and I started going to church, and I hated and then kindof liked the Twilight movie. And I'm feeling really good and comfortable in my own skin, for the first time in a long time or maybe ever. And I think I'm in the midst of a major shift in the way I see myself and my role in the world. Funny thing about major philosophical/spiritual/metaphysical shifts is that it's a bit tough to get thoughts around them while ongoing. So maybe all of these things are topics for another day, and I suppose a reason that you and I both should keep coming back here.

I'm also much more into Twitter these days, so you can also follow me there if you find yourself thinking, "Man, I wish I knew more about what Becky's up to..."

Girl Books vs. Boy Books

2008-10-23T16:14:00.000-07:00

I just finished Christopher Paolini's Brisinger, the 3rd book in (now he tells me!) a 4 book series. I liked it in general - the world he's crafted is beautifully elaborate and the characters are all pretty intriguing. BUT, man do the fight scenes drag on in this book - even more than Tolkien. There's a 10 page scene about forging a new sword, more decapitations than I can count and at least a dozen battles.

While I was dredging through what felt like the millionth battle, I was reminded of Brian's assessment of Stephenie Meyer's The Host. Basically he liked the story (one of the aliens who has taken over the planet falls in with a band of human resistance - drama ensues) but thought there were way too many descriptions of girly feelings. I LOVE the way that Meyer's handles girly angst, which is probably also why I'm such a big Twilight fan, and I think Brian would be super into Paolini's Inheritance Cycle cause the fighting scenes are beautifully crafted.

To think that our preferences are because I'm a girl and he's a boy is certainly an oversimplification, but it still has me wondering. Am I hard wired in some way towards the girliness?

Book Review: The Flying Troutmans

2008-10-23T15:56:00.000-07:00

My 2nd Powell's Books Indiespensable book - I quite liked it.

Lowered expectations

2008-10-16T19:12:00.000-07:00

I do the New York Times crossword puzzle whenever I can get my hands on a copy. For those of you who don't know, it gets increasingly harder as the week goes on - I can generally finish through Tuesday, by Saturday I'm totally screwed.

So, I was thrilled when I finished today's puzzle (a Thursday!) in all of about 15 minutes. Then I read the small print next to the puzzle - "all the daily puzzles this week have been contributed by puzzlemakers under the age of 20. Today's crossword is by Lucas Gaviotis Whitestone, 18 of New York City. He is a first year student at Carnegie Mellon University in Pittsburgh. This is his first puzzle for The Times."

Doh.

Guess I'll stop disparaging Ryan Reynolds

2008-10-13T13:12:00.000-07:00

Cause this is pretty cool.

Today, Today, Today

2008-10-08T11:42:00.001-07:00

In my new capacity as a Komen Austin Affiliate board member I had the opportunity today to have lunch with an amazing young woman who has been diagnosed with breast cancer at the age of 24. She has an incredible story and a willingness to share that I'm in awe of. Her story isn't mine to tell, but I was at lunch to talk about options for how she can work with Komen to get her message out, so keep an eye on the Komen Austin Blog and our Facebook Group as hopefully that's to come.

My personal take away from lunch is that it's really important for me to own my health and I'm sure I'll now be much more insistent in general with doctors when I think something is wrong. I think there's a tendency even at my age to think that breast cancer isn't something to worry about yet. Even though I don't know my medical history my GP and gynecologist have both said that 35 is the absolute earliest I should get a mammogram and really that 40 is "probably fine." Of course, I want to think that I'm healthy so it's easy to go along with it.

Every day I'm more committed to the cause of finding a cure for this wretched disease. As George says, we need a cure "today, today, today." You can join the fight by racing with me on November 2nd or visiting the Komen site to learn more.

Disclaimer - The postings on this site are my own and don’t represent Komen Austin positions, strategies or opinions.

Book Review: House Lights

2008-10-07T14:47:00.000-07:00

I stumbled upon Lean Hager Cohen's House Lights at a recent time killing trip to a chain bookstore - I picked it up because it's won a ton of awards (including being a New York Times Book Review Notable Book for 2007) and I liked the cover image.

It's certainly one of the best things I've read so far this year and was a very pleasant switch from all of my YA fare of late. The story follows Beatrice, a girl on the verge of 21 who after a strange insulated childhood is finally finding out that things with her family are not what they always seemed. It's a delicate and beautifully written coming of age story - unique in both the depth of the characters but also in its tone. Hager Cohen's attention to detail is spot on and the way she weaves descriptions into the story made everything seem hearbreakingly poignant. Fantastic female characters from 3 generations (Beatrice, her mother and her grandmother) are also a big plus.

Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act

2008-10-04T07:40:00.000-07:00

October 15th is National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day in the United States. More than 25,000 children are stillborn in the United States every year leaving mothers, entire families and communities devastated. Estimates of the rate of occurrence of stillbirth make it at least as common as autism.

Stillbirth is not an intractable problem. Greater research would likely significantly reduce its incidence, but good research requires good data. H.R. 5979: Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act is under consideration by Congress. This proposed bill would standardize stillbirth investigation and diagnosis, thus providing more data for the needed research. Better research means fewer children born still.

On October 15th, remember the thousands of unfinished children lost and the families who remain to grieve them. Honor them by taking action. Let’s help pass H.R. 5979.

Action Steps:

Step 1. Use Your Blog to Enlist Others-Copy the contents of this entire post and publish it on your blog immediately.

GOAL: Enlist 10 of your readers to spread the word

Step 2. Use Your E-mail to Enlist Others-E-mail 5 bloggers and ask them (nicely and in an unspammy way) to publish these action steps on their blog. Consider contacting celebrity bloggers, political bloggers, medical bloggers, or bloggers who are not part of your reading community.

GOAL: Enlist 3 bloggers outside of your normal blog sphere to spread the word in other online communities.

Step 3. Help Pass the Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act-By October 15th, publish a post on your blog supporting H.R. 5979 Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act. For maximum impact, title your post: “Stillbirth Awareness and Research Act.”

GOAL: 1,000,000 Google results on October 15th when that term is searched for. Currently, Google only returns 20,400 pages - most of which have nothing to do with the bill.

As a personal note, if you need convincing on the devastation this can bring to a couple (and their families, and the people who love them) here's some related reading.

Habits

2008-10-04T07:08:00.000-07:00

I have really gotten out of the habit of blogging, haven't I? I was all into Twitter for a while (and still love it), but I even got out of that habit during Fantastic Fest. I often think about things I'd like to say here, but the thought of logging in and typing them seems like such a drag. My yoga and tai chi teachers are always on about how many times you have to do something until it becomes a habit (3 times a week comes to mind - I obviously blow them off during these comments now that I think about it), so perhaps I'll make that committment to NCTM for a bit and see how it goes.

The Cure Happens Today

2008-09-05T13:36:00.000-07:00

I've been volunteering with the Austin Affiliate of the Susan G. Komen for the Cure for almost exactly a year - first as a member now co-chair of the Technology Committee, also helping with a special project for the Annual Race for the Cure, and I've applied to be on the board (keep your fingers crossed for the big vote on the 18th).

Before I had the chance to work with this group, I might not have listed finding a cure for breast cancer in my top 5 causes, but I've had such a positive experience working with all of the women and men who are so passionate about the goal of finding a cure that I am now equally as committed. Several things happened really; I'm now coming in direct contact with the people who are affected by this terrible disease; I haven't met a single volunteer who hasn't impressed the hell out of me; AND (last but not least) I finally took a moment to think about my relationship with my own body, and what it would mean to have my own breasts (certainly a part of my femininity, despite my conflicted relationship with them) under attack.

All of this to say, I'm on a Race for the Cure team and if you feel like supporting me or this fantastic cause you can run with us or make a donation here. There's also a Facebook group if you want to learn more about other events, volunteering opportunities, etc.

And now that I'm thinking about it, here are the other causes I'm doing my best to support as well: helping children grow into happy, successful adults (I'm a mentor with BBBS, certainly another life changing experience); supporting reproductive rights for all women regardless of class or race; ending violence against women; suicide prevention. The list goes on and on now that I've started...

Feeling the need to stand on a soap box for a minute. Pick a cause (or 10) and REALLY support it. Writing a big check is great, but every single group needs committed volunteers, too. You can decide how much of a time committment you're willing to make and I promise you'll get at least as much out of it as you've put in.

Book Review: Clown Girl

2008-08-25T16:04:00.000-07:00

I am not remotely like any of the characters in Monica Drake's Clown Girl and nothing about their lives is remotely familiar to me. And yet, I loved the lead character Nita (aka Clown Girl) and the assorted hoodlums and heroes in this strange story. Drake clearly has a talent with misfit characters and I ended up being really drawn into the frantic world she creates. It took me a while to get into it, but I stayed up late to finish - something that I haven't done with a non-YA book in quite a while.

IndieSpensable Volume IV: Clown Girl

2008-08-13T16:13:00.000-07:00

A while back, I decided to spring for an IndieSpensable subscription from one of my super favorite bookstores, Powell's Books. According to the site, IndieSpensable is a subscription that "delivers the best new books, with special attention to leading independent publishers. Signed first editions. Inventive, original sets. Exclusive printings.... Every six weeks, another installment to read and admire." What better thing for a girl who loves books, supporting local bookstores, AND getting fantastic fun things in the mail?

My first installment arrived today and I'm not dissapointed. Here's what's inside:

The Super Crazy Cat Dance - a "super-fun crazy comic for kids and grownups alike" by Aron Nels Steinke
Clown Girl by Monica Drake - one of a special limited edition of 750, and the novel's only hardcover printing
A rubber chicken key chain
A collection of extra large postcards featuring stuff abou the authors, Portland (Powell's Books hometown), and the series

Missing the boat on Twilight

2008-07-30T12:19:00.000-07:00

This Salon article on the Twilight phenomenon is a perfect example of why I decided not to go into academia. There are some good points here, to be sure (Clee and I have long regreted that reading Twilight turns us into petulent teenage girls), but I seriously wish that this woman would lighten up.

The fact that she's so dismissive of these books really pisses me off. Just because they're popular doesn't mean they're bad. Have we learned nothing from Harry Potter? Plus, the fact that teenage girls and their Moms agree on anything is completely fantastic, let alone that these books are getting people to read at all. And say what you want about Bella, but I think it's pretty great that the female lead of the series - a smart, shy, physically awkward girl who is capable of speaking her mind - gets to be the love interest of not one but 2 heroes.

I've read plenty of the crap that Harold Bloom was always on about, and sure, lots of it is really great. But it's also usually dense, and pretentious and totally overwrought.

I'm anxiously awaiting the delivery of Breaking Dawn on the day it comes out, and I'll probably go to the release party at Book People, too. And I'll stand there with all of the other fangirls of all ages, and shriek and sigh and moon, and embrace the beautifully absurd romance of these fantastic books. And if I come home expecting a little more from my own knight in shining armor, so be it.

The Negative Effects of Suicide (aka Bad Ripples)

2008-07-29T09:56:00.000-07:00

My Dad committed suicide a little over 3 years ago now, and I often wonder what would have happened if he had come to me before hand, if he had given me a chance to try to talk to him out of it. He died because he was very depressed, and feeling hopeless, and thought he was doing me and my Mom a favor.

Because the universe works in mysterious ways, I recently had the chance to have this conversation with someone dear to me. Only time will tell if I had any effect, but it occured to me that maybe there are other people out there who are considering taking their own lives because they believe the same lie that he believed - that the world, my world, was better without him in it. Trouble is, NOW, I know what I would have said, but I wouldn't have had any idea back then, I probably would have just said the same old crap that people say in Hallmark movies, or when adversting about medication for troubled teens. So, here's what I would tell him now, with the benefit of hindsight.

But, first, a disclaimer or 2. I'm just a woman who lost her Dad and in no way capable of giving actual advice. If you're thinking about it, please talk to someone in your own life who you trust, or even someone that you don't (they may surprise you). My Dad did not have a serious life threatening illness, nor was he ever a threat to others - these possibilities and many others would likely change my answers. I can only speak to what happened to me, and how I feel about it now. It feels strange to be putting this "out there" at all, but I am still strangely compelled to do so. Here goes:

1. I'm not going to "get over it." Loved ones aren't just sad for a while and then move on. My mom still cries every day, 3 years and 1 month later. I'm the stoic one, but I still cry plenty. There are moments - quite often - when the loss hits me like a ton of bricks, and it feels like I'm just getting that phone call on the day he died. A woman in a support group I went to lost her father over 30 years ago and she still obviously misses the hell out of him.
2. My life is worse - aside from the grief - for several practical reasons. Mom's life is way harder now and I'm the one who has to constantly pick up the pieces. Every day, I spend time and mental energy that at this stage of my life would typically be going to something else, like starting a family of my own. I may not ever have kids now and I know that this, too, is grief that I will have to work through at some point.
3. Things that were fun now make me vomit - like the game Hangman, for example, or that ridiculous movie The Happening that I'll never get to see because people kill themselves in it. For the first year after it happened, every time I heard the word rope, or saw a picture of one, or God forbid saw someone hanging, I literally threw up. EVERY TIME. I'd estimate about 50 times in the first year. Now I just feel like someone punched me in the stomach. I'd imagine the same applies for other methods, but guns, cars and pills are way more prevalent than ropes, so multiply my issue by a nice round number.
4. Mom and I are more at risk of committing suicide ourselves. The numbers vary, but I've read that I'm as much as 40% more likely now that a person close to me as done it. Those aren't very good odds - how often would you make a choice where you knew someone you loved had a 40% chance of dying? Or even a 10% chance?
5. Mom will always blame herself. The fact that she is now doomed to that hardly seems like something he would have wanted for her, and it certainly didn't make her life easier.
6. Other general "bad ripples" - I don't know and may never know all of the other things that changed with his death. Maybe things would have gotten better for him, maybe not, but this not knowing is I think the hardest thing for me. He met a violent end - physically and emotionally. How could that not have unknown consequences in this vast universe?

So I think that about covers it. I really do understand and of course I forgave him immediately. Everyone has to make their own choices in this world, and who am I to say that this isn't the right choice for some people? Maybe it even was right for him, but it sure as hell doesn't feel like it. I just thought you should know.

OMG I am so hot for this guy

2008-07-25T13:56:00.001-07:00

I know I am late to the internet party, again, but wow do I have a new crush.

Swimming and other summer obsessions

2008-07-23T11:10:00.001-07:00

It occurs to me that I've gone quite a long time without a post and apparently this has made at least one of my readers nervous. Yes, Christina, I am alive and well, thanks for asking!

Nothing much exciting has been happening (other than a trip to Pennsylvania to visit my Mom - numerous posts about our trip can be found here), I've just been taking it a bit easy.

In no particular order, here's what I've been doing with my free time:
1. Swimming! We're at Bartholomew or Mueller pool 3 or 4 days a week, mostly just chatting and bobbing around. I have a tan, working on my Freestyle, and plan on re-learning to dive later this summer.
2. Reading! Finishing books at a mad pace, mostly to distract myself from the insane level of anticipation about Breaking Dawn. You can check out everything I've read and what I thought about it on my Facebook profile. As promised, I'm reading some grown up books these days, but still with a fair amount of YA mixed in.
3. Watching Le Tour! Yes, there continue to be some serious doping issues with the race, but it's still awesome for several reasons. The Garmin-Chipotle and Columbia teams are keeping it clean and doing amazingly well - go U.S.A.! Several of my favorites are alumni of Lance's teams, and it's really great to watch them doing so well for themselves, after spending so many years supporting him.
4. Running! I'm back to consistent 4-6 mile runs in preparation for Disney World in January and I'm really loving it so far. Mostly running on the treadmill at the gym, but the new trail at Mueller is quite a nice run as well if I can get out before it gets too hot.

Summertime

2008-06-25T14:55:00.000-07:00

My girl Fayrene does an excellent job of showing one of my new favorite things about summer - movies in the backyard. John's talking about us watching the 100 films from Entertainment Weekly's list of new classics, and if F brings her fantastic strawberry shortcake every time, then count me in!

Movies in the backyard are still a distant 2nd to my other favorite pastime - swimming at Bartholomew Pool, but that's a whole other post.

Violent and Crazy

2008-06-23T15:15:00.001-07:00

This Violent Femmes rendition of Gnarls Barkley's Crazy is making its way around the Interwebs today, but it's so fantastic I'm jumping on the bandwagon.

All I Want for Christmas is a Vitamix

2008-06-17T14:39:00.000-07:00

I really love smoothies and I don't like Jamba Juice (too sweet) or Daily Juice (too far from my house/filled with hippies.) So, I make them at home.

Trouble is, my crappy blender can't blend all of the delectable things I put in (greens like kale, romaine lettuce or spinach have found their way in, as have beets, carrots and of course assorted fruits).

A man was selling fancy blenders at Costco once for $300 and I wouldn't let John buy one. The Vitamix 5200 pictured here retails for closer to $500 and I'm pretty serious about wanting one. Because even if you like beets in your smoothies (who doesn't!???), trust me when I say that you want them blended up really well.

My recipe, you ask? Sure...
1/2 cup soy milk
1/2 to 1 cup water, depending on thickness
4-6 ice cubes
2 cups assorted frozen fruit (banana, mango, blueberries - all fantastic!)
2 big handfuls of leafy greens, the greener the better

The blender should be full all the way to the top, and if you have a crappy blender like mine you'll have to periodically stop/re-start to shake it up to help things along. Half an apple gets rid of the kale taste - the other greens are easier to hide.

A Heartbreaking Work

2008-06-12T13:15:00.000-07:00

June 10th makes it 2 years since Dad died. I made it through the 10th okay, but was pretty much a mess all day yesterday (the 11th) - I think it's because that was the day we finally got to the house in Pennsylvania, and the day I called all of the relatives, making it more of the "real" day for me. I've been thinking lately about all of the strange stages and phases of grief I've traveled through so far. Time, it seems, continues to move too fast and too slowly - some days it's like the first day he's gone, then yesterday I spent hours trying to figure out if it was the 2nd or 3rd anniversary.

Somewhat related, I tried to re-read "A Heartbreaking Work of Staggering Genius" and ended up leaving it on the night stand at the JW Marriot in Washington. I read it when it first came out and didn't think too much of it, but I thought that now maybe I would "get it" since my circumstances have changed. Nope, still not a fan. I'm probably bias because I know (and like) someone who doesn't get portrayed very well in the book. But I still don't buy what I think is one of the main themes - that people who have been sideswiped by grief are members of a special club that "regular" folks could never understand, and it's okay to (on some level) write everyone else off. Dad's death doesn't make me part of a special club, and if it does I guess I don't want to be a member.

Lessons from a lazy weekend

2008-06-09T10:03:00.000-07:00

Coming off of a delightfully lazy weekend - yoga, playing on the Wii Fit, watching movies, reading and hanging out on the couch with John and all of the animals (including the world's cutest kitty who really really needs a good home).

I finished Sarah Dessen's The Truth About Forever and Just Listen, both sweetly satisfying if somewhat simple YA books that I really identified with, for different reasons. In The Truth About Forever, the main character struggles through getting over the sudden loss of her Dad by trying to be as perfect as possible. In Just Listen, the main character finds love with the outsider boy who is obsessively passionate about music. A key message from both is that you can't deny the ugliness of your past, which is certainly something I continue to struggle with. Both girls are quick to use one of my often used phrases - "It's fine" - for all of us it usually means, "things are not fine but let's all pretend that they are cause that feels easier right now." In Dessen's books, there's always a thoughtful, handsome boy who compassionately guides the main characters through the heartache of moving on. Cheaper than a therapist, certainly, but not particularly realistic for a 31 year old married lady. Especially one who is so obstinate about doing everything herself.

Now that I think about it, Jenn's Hatha class on Saturday morning kindof fit with this theme as well. It was a really restorative class, lots of props and heart opening, and slowly moving between poses. Jenn talked a lot about the concept of "storylines" - basically, the idea that we're always working to convey our storyline - our idea of who we are and what we're about. The storyline is usually a myth - a way of forcing ourselves into compartments and easy definitions. At the end of class, during savasana, Jeff Buckley's version of Leonard Cohen's Halleluja started playing - that song's always a trigger for me and I quietly cried, which felt really nice, actually.

It's been a while since I had some time to sit around and lazily digest things, and all of the reading and watching and generally taking things in feels like preparation for something. Maybe I'll finally start writing (REALLY writing, not just the blathering that happens here) or just start to get some real clarity about why bad things sometimes happen to (relatively) good people.

On the road again

2008-06-03T11:59:00.000-07:00

Spending a few days in DC for more meetings (this morning's event on Web 2.0 in Government was really interesting, so maybe more on that later).

I'm kindof tired of traveling, but the fantastic bed at the JW Marriott at least looks inviting. Now if only I could get used to sleeping without the husband and all of the animals.

Young Love

2008-06-01T19:56:00.000-07:00

As I've previously mentioned, I've been big time into Young Adult books lately. I'm now re-reading Stephenie Meyer's new one, The Host. A really great read, although this one took me a little longer to get into then the Twilight series. The back cover compares her to Isaac Asimov, and I have to say it's not a bad comparison. I love Asimov - the Ender series is particularly incredible - and mid-way through the 2nd reading, I agree that Meyers has managed to create a completely believable sci-fi story that captures a lot of the same emotion that Asimov has when he's at his best. The Host is a fantastic read and I immediately started it again after finishing cause I was so stressed out by the plot line the first time (agonizing about these characters I really came to love, much like with Twilight) that I knew I'd be able to enjoy it more on the 2nd reading.

That said, I think I'm going to take a break from YA after this one, or at least choose something that doesn't center on a love story. It has been a long time since I experienced teenage love. Even though I was on the older side (19) and probably smarter about it than most (I have always been nothing if not responsible) it was still pretty consuming - my emotions turning on a dime, thinking about him constantly, obsessing over every single moment. I married that guy, and I think we've transitioned quite nicely into a sustainable, mostly wonderful grown-up version. I would still walk through fire to be with him, but I don't anticipate needing to do so any time soon. But the teenage love stories are starting to muddle my brain a bit, and I sometimes find myself feeling wistful. Today, at the airport, all I got was a sideways hug while he was still belted in, a quick kiss, and then I got my own bag out of the car. Perfectly acceptable since I'm only gone for 3 days and I travel pretty frequently on business, but for a minute I was kindof pissed. Where was the declaration that he would die without me? The sweeping me up in a passionate kiss like I was the last woman on the face of the earth? Never mind that either would have made me extremely uncomfortable cause I'm not really that kind of girl, it still took me about 20 minutes to shake the feeling that I was missing something.

I'll probably pick up a new book while I'm here - maybe a nice presidential biography, or something about food. Anyone have any good books to cleanse my palette?