Parody & Son

"Healthcare Fighting (Kung Fu Mix)"

2009-10-12T11:35:00.005-04:00

It looks like the battle over healthcare reform is winding down. Soon we’ll have a bill. Well, that went smoothly. Just like we learned in Civics class. Except for all the screaming and yelling. And misinformation. And finger pointing. If there’s one thing we learned from healthcare reform it’s that we need some serious lobbying reform. All the money that was spent on those pro-reform and anti-reform ads that flooded the airwaves could’ve insured countless people. But who knows. Maybe what they say is true: “Laughter is the best medicine.” In that case, we need a “Parody Option.” Everyone is eligible. No forms to fill out. And unlike your current health plan, our parodies are free – no co-pay required…

See your favorite political heavy-hitters fight it out over healthcare reform – Kung Fu style!! After months of healthcare bickering and bitterness, this musical parody is just what the doctor ordered.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Audio Engineer: Jeff Vacca
Produced and recorded at JSM Music, NYC

PLAY THE “GOVERNMENT GEEK SWEEPSTAKES”
Can you name all the politicians that make an appearance in this parody? Can you name the states they represent(ed) or positions they hold? Without Googling?(If you can, you need to watch less C-SPAN and get out more often.) Special honors to the first 10 people with the correct answers. SUBMIT YOUR ANSWERS BY COMMENTING OR VIA E-MAIL.

"I Crossed the Line"

2009-09-22T21:51:00.006-04:00

This was hardly “The Summer of Love.” It seems everywhere you looked, people were crossing the line. Take Glenn Beck. Please. First he calls the President a socialist, a communist, a facist and a racist. Then as if that wasn’t enough name-calling, he throws in the N word. No, not that one. A Nazi. And just when you thought you knew where the line was, it moved even further. It’s no longer enough for Medicaire and Medicaid recipients to show up at Town Hall meetings ranting and raving about how they don’t want the government involved in health care. Now you have to show up with a gun! Is anyone really surprised that some of that Town Hall ‘tude found it’s way into Congress!?! When Rep. Joe Wilson lost it in a special joint session of congress, I thought maybe we’d seen it all. Then Serena Williams had an epic meltdown at the U.S. Open. And while I was waiting for one last act of outrageous behavior so I could finish my parody, the very next day Kayne West has yet another one of his tantrums at yet another award show. Throw in the ongoing saga of Gov.Mark Sanford and the unethical conduct of Michael Jackson’s doctor, and they can make beautiful music together…

Some of the most outrageous behavior of the last few months comes together in one outburst-packed musical parody. It’s the “Best of the Worst,” all set to the music of Johnny Cash -- no stranger to crossing the line himself.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Music Edit: Blast, NYC

“Guantanamo”

2009-06-22T16:46:00.009-04:00

When the Guantanamo Bay Tourism Board approached me to help promote the Guantanamo Bay detention facility as a world-class resort destination, I jumped at the opportunity. Politics aside, this is a prime piece of Caribbean real estate. Oceanfront property ain’t cheap, and we are in the midst of a financial crisis. I figured there must me something we can do to cash in. Maybe we turn it into a landmark destination? Like Alcatraz. Or a resort zone? You know, like Cancun. Or how about a Vegas-style theme hotel like Ceasar’s Palace? This way we can keep all the orange jumpsuits. Guantanamo Bay Hotel & Casino. That actually has a nice ring to it. Sure, they all laughed when Bugsy Siegel had the dream of turning an isolated patch of dessert into a gambling Mecca, but who’s laughing now? (Okay, maybe that wasn’t the best example since he was shot to death, but you get the point.) When they normalize relations with Cuba, we’ll see who’s laughing. To make sure people take this seriously (we wouldn’t want people to think this is joke!!) we even have a website:

gitmotourism.blogspot.com

But there’s much more work to be done. Currently, we have plans to convert all interrogation cells into more guest-friendly “Chat Rooms.” And we’re re-thinking our check-out policy. Of course, I’m counting on my friends in the ad world to vote in the slogan poll, or come up with your own. Like any good ex-ad man, if you come up with the winning theme I will gladly take credit for it…

The Guantanamo Bay Tourism Board invites you to visit the most exclusive island getaway in the world. Experience our warm Cuban sun, cool Caribbean breezes and world infamous CIA hospitality.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman

“Hey Paula (American Idol Mix)”

2009-05-09T12:26:00.019-04:00

Yes, I watch American Idol. I watch, but I don’t vote. If I did, I’d cast mine for Danny. He reminds me of Michael McDonald, and I always liked the Doobie Brothers. Kris is a nice guy, but I didn’t even know his name until there were only five contestants left. Idols should be more memorable than that. Adam is certainly unforgettable, but the high-pitched scream thing really bothers me. I guess it’s fine when he’s singing just one song, but I can’t imagine hearing that song after song after song. But what do I know? I’m no judge. As for them… do I think Simon is a pompous ass? Sure, and he gets really bad hair cuts. But I also think his comments are usually dead on. Randy is pretty good. I really like Cara. I think she gives great, constructive feedback. And I think she’s cute. And Paula? Well, I feel the same way about her as Anderson Cooper does. (In case you didn’t hear his comments on the Tonight Show, CLICK HERE.) I don’t mind that she’s a flake, but to get her to say anything negative about a contestant they’d have to sing as bad as ME. (Just because I can write songs, that doesn’t mean I can sing them. Trust me.)

SPECIAL NOTE: My daughter is a guest vocalist on this parody, so I guess this month we’re Parody & Son & Daughter…

Does Simon make your skin crawl? Does Paula make your head spin? Love ‘em or hate ‘em, the only thing more fun than judging American Idol contestants, is judging the judges!

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman, Allie Hopman

“Goin’ to the C.P.A (The Tax Song)”

2009-04-10T08:46:00.005-04:00

When I was thinking about what to say about taxes, I came across so many great quotes I figured I’d let others do the talking for once. Everyone knows what Benjamin Franklin said about death and taxes being the only certainties in life. But I like what Will Rogers said better: the only difference between death and taxes is that death doesn’t get worse every time Congress meets. While an unknown author said of life's two certainties, there’s only one for which you can get an automatic extension. Ronald Regan had a good one too. He said the taxpayer was someone who worked for the federal government, but didn’t have to take the Civil Service exam. Former Louisiana Senator Russell B. Long said a tax loophole is "something that benefits the other guy. If it benefits you, it is tax reform.'' And former Secretary of the Treasury William Simon said, “The nation should have a tax system that looks like someone designed it on purpose. “ This is good stuff. Albert Einstein said, “The hardest thing in the world to understand is the income tax.” How great is that!?! There’s an old Jewish proverb that says taxes are one of the only things that can grow without rain. Another unknown author said people who complain about taxes can be divided into two classes: men and women. But my favorite quote was attributed to another unknown author who said, ”Did you ever notice that when you put the words "THE" and "IRS" together, it spells "THEIRS?" I mean, I can write parodies, but this stuff is priceless…
Why just complain about paying taxes when you can SING about complaining about paying taxes?!? Follow the tale of a typical taxpayer who tells the I.R.S. to K.M.A!! WARNING: DO NOT TRY THIS AT HOME.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Recorded at JSM Music, NY

“Can’t Keep On Making More Babies”

2009-03-11T22:34:00.007-04:00

You gotta love that OctoMom. Six kids at home, eight more in the hospital, and she still finds time to hire a publicist. And fire a publicist. And hire another publicist. And fire them, too. (The last one said, “She was nuts,” like you didn’t already know.) Of course, like all parents, now she’ll have to make sacrifices. She might have to get a job -- so she can maintain her Botox treatments. As for the calls to 9-1-1, I’m not saying anyone couldn’t misplace their kid now and then. But if she lost track when she had 6, what’s going to happen with 14!?!? It’s also been reported that Nadya hasn’t had sex in 8 years!! (Well, there’s something we both have in common.) The way I see it, it’ll be at least another 8 before she’s got a shot. With all those kids running around, she might not have time for dating…

She’s a mother of 14! She’s unemployed! She’s out of her mind! And now she’s the star of her own musical parody!! See “OctoMom” Nadya Suleman (as Angelina Jolie) in this cautionary tale of birth out-of-control.
Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Recorded at JSM Music, NYC

WE’RE CELEBRATING OUR ONE YEAR ANNIVERSARY!!!
It’s hard to believe it was just about one year ago that Elliot Spitzer dropped his drawers in a Washington Hotel room, and I found a new hobby. (That maybe doesn’t sound so good. I meant this whole musical parody thing.) My, how time flies when you’re making fun of people. Back then, Parody & Son was a two man operation working out of my study. Now, a full year later, I sometimes work out of my kitchen. But our commitment to creating classic capsules of current events (and my love for alliteration) remains the same. Our thanks to Elliot Spitzer, Sarah Palin, Hillary Clinton, Barack Obama, Rev. Jeremiah Wright, the financial industry, the airline industry, the oil industry, Michael Phelps, O.J. Simpson, Rod Blagojevich, Jim McGreevey, A-Rod, Christie Brinkley, OctoMom, John McCain, and John McCain. (We really have to thank him more than once.) And of course, thanks to all the blog subscribers, FaceBook group members and HUNDREDS OF THOUSANDS of people who have viewed our parodies.

“Because Michael Phelps Got High"

2009-02-08T20:45:00.009-05:00

Looks like the “Baltimore Bullet” shot himself in the foot. Or maybe just stubbed his toe. His career is hardly up in smoke, and there’s clearly no need to demonize Michael Phelps. Of course, we can still make fun of him. In my opinion, the REAL bad guy is the creep that went public with the picture. (Then again, if it weren’t for creeps like him, creeps like ME wouldn’t have the chance to write parodies about Michael Phelps.) The bottom line is a superhuman swimmer reminded us all he’s really human after all. The good news is, now he can run for President!!
In any case, there’s a lesson to be learned. Swimming is clearly a gateway sport to drugs. Parents, keep your kids out of the pool!!!

Hold onto your Speedo!! Olympic champion Michael Phelps is in hot water, and this musical parody takes a look at the scandal stroke for stroke, and toke for toke. (Special appearances by Bob Marley, Snoop Dogg, Paris Hilton, Willie Nelson, George Bush, Bill Clinton & Barack Obama.)

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman

PASS THIS VIDEO AROUND -- LIKE A BONG!!

“All-Star Jailhouse Rock”

2008-12-23T22:28:00.080-05:00

When it rains it pours ... I’m in the middle of working on my Holiday Parody, thinking it will be the last one in ’08, when BAM!! O.J. Simpson gets sentenced. The auto industry is on life support. And as if that’s not enough, this governor with really funny hair and an equally funny name gets busted for trying to sell a Senate seat!! Really!?! And it’s all happening at the same time!?! It’s the perfect parody storm. I actually started writing a Detroit parody, but it was really depressing. But Blago and O.J. – they’re pretty laughable. One in jail, the other likely on his way. How could I resist? BTW, you can’t imagine the images that turned up when I was Googling “Prison Bitch” and “Prison Shower.” Or maybe you can...

Rod Blagojevich and O.J. Simpson lead an all-star cast in this musical parody salute to famous felons. Take a look and we think you’ll agree -- what we do to this Elvis classic is criminal! Special appearances by: Paris Hilton, Michael Vick, Martha Stewart, Jon Stewart & David Letterman.

Lyrics: B. Hopman Vocals: R. Hopman
Produced by: JSM Music, NYC

“Holiday Parking Hell”

2008-12-14T22:57:00.014-05:00

I’ll be the first to admit it: I have parking issues. Mall parking lots cause me stress on a good day. During the Holiday Season, it’s a friggin’ nightmare!!! It’s to the point where I won’t go anywhere near a mall from October until March!!! I share this with you for two reasons. First, I thought it would be appropriate at this time of year to do a Holiday-themed parody. Since this whole parking thing haunts me every year, I figured, “Why not sing about it?” (After all, it’s cheaper than therapy.) Secondly, I think it’s time to raise awareness about Parking Stress Syndrome. SEND THIS PARODY TO EVERYONE YOU KNOW!!! Together, we can find a cure. I’m sure I’m not the only one who suffers from this problem. Am I?....

‘Tis the season for overcrowded malls and packed parking lots. During this most joyous of seasons, we raise our voices in musical parody to celebrate this annual hellish Holiday nightmare. Looking for some “Peace on Earth” and “good will towards man?” Then don’t look here!!

Lyrics: B. Hopman Vocals: The JSM Choir
Produced & Recorded by: JSM Music, NYC

"Why Can't We (at least pretend to) Be Friends?"

2008-11-13T15:15:00.006-05:00

Election ’08 really was the gift that keeps on giving. But now it’s over. Let the post-election parodies begin!! I would’ve posted this sooner but a) I had to go away for a week to the lesser-known Kitty Dukakis clinic to break my addiction to cable news which had grown to full-blown junkie status over the past year , and b) it took me all this time before I was convinced there wouldn’t be a recount. Now that it’s over, one final observation. ..
I don’t know about you, but the last time I called a plumber to solve a problem, he had to come back three times ‘til he got it right. I’m not exactly sure how that translates politically other than I guess there are some Johns even a plumber can’t help…

The votes are all counted. The people have spoken. Now it’s time for Democrats and Republicans to reach across the aisle – and ring each others necks!!! This post election parody provides a musical review of Election ’08, and a look at the stormy seas ahead as we set sail on the bi-partisanship…

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman

Johnny Come Lately, and often...

2008-10-14T22:10:00.004-04:00

When I saw John McCain at Monday’s rally in Virginia Beach, I couldn’t believe what I was hearing. It wasn’t anything negative. No smears or innuendo. Totally non-political. And something I would never expect him to brag about in public. Then again, at his age, I guess it is something to brag about. I’ll let you decide…
(NOTE: This isn’t technically a parody, but I couldn’t resist. Call it parod-ic license. You should also know that even though this video features John McCain, it really isn’t partisan. If Barack Obama would’ve said what McCain said, I SWEAR I would’ve made the same video.)
Special Appearance by Meg Ryan, who I used to have a big crush on before she did that thing to her lips.

John McCain said some VERY interesting things at his rally in Virginia Beach the other day…

“Financial Crisis: The Musical”

2008-10-02T23:57:00.006-04:00

The parody gods have been very good to me lately. Just when the Palin pandemonium started to die down and I was beginning to worry about finding a topic for my next parody, along comes a financial mega-meltdown. Am I the luckiest guy in the world, or what!?! I mean, financial institutions are going down faster than Sarah Palin’s poll numbers. It’s a parody gold-mine. Who would’ve ever seen this one coming? (Certainly not the President. Or congress. Or the Fed.) I’m no economics expert, but I do know this: they had better solve this crisis fast, because if I have to hear someone saying the Wall Street/Main Street thing one more time, my head’s going to explode. Enough already! We get it!! And EVERYONE’S saying it. Republicans. Democrats. In advertising, we would never use the same line as a competitor. I suppose it’s better than “You’re fucked,” but still --it’s almost as overused as “CHANGE.” Speaking of which, that’s my two cents on this whole mess which, coincidentally, is about the value of my 401K last time I checked…

The “Shock” Market is out of control. “Gall” Street is crumbling. Your savings have been 401KO’D. Just when you thought the economy has hit a low note, here comes a real chorus of gloom and doom. It won’t take a degree in economics to enjoy this musical parody. Just a degree of humor…
(Special appearance by John McCain.)

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Music Edited by: Blast, NYC

"Who Are You?" (VP Mix)

2008-09-06T11:23:00.005-04:00

Experience (or lack of it) aside, there’s certainly something different about the Republican VP nominee. I mean, she’s kinda hot. You know, in a Lynda Carter Wonder Woman-ish let down your hair and take off your glasses naughty librarian kind of way. Of course, I guess she really doesn’t have a lot of competition when you compare her to the likes of Joe Lieberman, Bob Dole, Bush the First or Geraldine Ferraro for that matter. Even though John Edwards was kinda cute. But I digress…
Looks like Sarah Palin is turning into quite a star for the Republican party, dare I say – a celebrity (which until last week they said was a bad thing. But I guess it’s okay now.) She’s SO big, she even has her own music video…

A couple of years ago, she could get you out of a parking ticket in Wasilla, and now she’s on the Republican Presidential ticket!?! It may sound like the sequel to “Being There,” but this ain’t no movie! Sarah Palin stars in this real life rags-to-possible-riches musical parody. Co-starring Bill Maher.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Music Edited by: Blast, NYC

"No Free Ride"

2008-08-19T23:15:00.003-04:00

I know things are bad for the airline industry. I understand they have to find any way they can to increase revenue. So when they started charging for meals and snacks, did I complain? No. Did I say anything when they started charging for baggage? Not a peep. I didn’t even gripe when they raised all the award levels and started charging extra for window and aisle seats. But when I heard that Jet Blue recently announced they were going to start charging for pillows, something had to be said – or sung. I mean, charging for pillows!?!? Really!?!? I wouldn’t let one of those germ infested drool collectors touch my head if they paid ME!!! Do they really think this will help increase profitability? I’d like to meet the person who’d pay $7 to rest their head on what is nothing more than a fabric covered Petrie dish. (With my luck, they’ll probably be in the seat next to me on my next flight!) I say just get rid of the pillows altogether, and we’ll all have more space in the overhead bins. But what do I know…

Fasten your seat belt. No-frills flying reaches new heights in this airline industry musical parody. It’s a different kind of in-flight entertainment that confirms what you already know – flying really IS for the birds! Forget about first class, business class or economy class. This video has NO class…

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Music Edited by: Blast, NYC

!!FORWARD TO YOUR FRIENDS AND FAVORITE FREQUENT FLIERS!!

"That's Adultery!"

2008-07-18T14:11:00.010-04:00

A-Rod does it. Hulk Hogan does it. Even Bill Belichick (no stranger to cheating) is getting in on the action!! While apparently the rest of the world has been busy getting busy, we’ve been busy documenting the recent (and no so recent) exploits of an alleged adulterers A-List. ..

An extra-marital musical parody, literally ripped from the headlines. It’s a tabloid treasure trove of alleged adulterers, featuring a cast of thousands – a veritable “Who’s Who” of who’s doing who. They may call it adultery, but there’s nothing adult about THIS video!

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Music Edited by: Blast, NYC

PARODY OUT-TAKES
Not every lyric gets to make it into a Parody & Son parody. Each lyric is crafted by hand and must meet the highest (a.k.a. lowest) standards before it is selected. Here are some that didn’t make the cut:

“When you’re dropping your drawers with a wife that’s not yours…”
“When you’re poking your rod, in some other girl’s bod…”
“When you like the night life, but just not with your wife…”

Maybe you’d like to share a few? Send us an e-mail or leave a comment…

FORWARDING IS THE SINCEREST FORM OF FLATTERY... if you like what you see, pass it on!!

"Hot Headed"

2008-06-19T08:34:00.008-04:00

While it would’ve been a lot more fun searching images for an “Internet Porn” parody, the people have spoken, and John McCain has been declared the winner of the first 2008 Parody Poll. (You should know, however, I did come across some very disturbing McCain images which would’ve worked surprisingly well in an Internet Porn parody!!) As for those of you who didn’t vote at all, you are now stuck with the parody others have chosen and forfeit the right to complain about it. At least you won’t have to live with their decision for four years…

Does John McCain really have a bad temper? You bet your #!%$!#@!! a$$ he does!! They say music soothes the savage beast, but I don’t think everyone’s favorite septuagenarian presidential candidate will find this song very soothing…

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Music Edited by: Blast, NYC

"What Goes Up (& Up & Up)"

2008-06-19T08:33:00.005-04:00

If the high price of gas has you singing the blues, you're not alone.
Here's a little ditty that will have you yearning for the good ol' days, when gas was just 3 bucks a gallon!!

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman

"Done, Done, Done"

2008-06-19T08:31:00.004-04:00

The parody that asks the musical question, "How the hell is Hillary gonna pull this one off!?!?!" A comical commentary with a little bi-partisan bashing for everyone.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Produced & Recorded at JSM Music, NYC

"The Wright Stuff"

2008-06-19T08:30:00.005-04:00

The Rev. Jeremiah Wright meets the New Kids on the Block. It's a marriage made in musical parody heaven. We never had sermons like this at my temple. (Maybe it's because we're reformed?)

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Produced & Recorded at JSM Music, NYC

"Three's Company: NJ Style"

2008-06-19T08:29:00.004-04:00

Like a fine wine, the sex-capades of New Jersey's Ex-Governor just get better with age. Now with three-way sex!! A musical parody, in three-part harmony.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Produced & Recorded at JSM Music, NYC

"Client #9"

2008-06-19T08:19:00.005-04:00

An Eliot Spitzer song parody -- follow "The Luv Gov" as he travels from the State House to the Whore House.

Lyrics: Bruce Hopman Vocals: Ross Hopman
Produced & Recorded at JSM Music, NYC