BLAK

A Weighty Issue

2008-07-31T15:21:00.002+10:00

Eli is now a little over 3 months old, but has only gained 1.5kg since his birth. On the last 2 'weigh-ins' he had lost, rather than gained weight. It's not a supply issue, but something to do with Eli's lack of enthusiasm for the breast. He doesn't stay on for long and is easily distracted. We're wondering if it's because of his early reflux issues, or because he's lactose intolerant, or something else. Whilst the stress and concern are running high (especially for Stacie), the worry level is only at a 5 out of 10 for me. Basically, I've decided not to panic just yet. If the next couple of weigh-ins show him to be declining still, I'll start thinking about some drastic measures.

Not a job interview

2008-07-29T22:46:00.002+10:00

This coming Saturday (2nd August, 2008) I'll be attending two interviews conducted by the Moore College Selection Panel, as the next stage of having my application for admission to the college considered.

Because ministry is not just a job, but an 'all of life' commitment, the interviews are more comprehensive and perhaps more intensive than most (or so I've heard).

I feel quite positive about the whole thing though - not because I'll breeze through without difficulties (I've got lots of baggage and incompetencies), but because God has plans that will be best for me and that will surely come to pass.

Stacie has commented that MTS has been affirming for her that we can operate as a married couple in full-time vocational ministry. It has certainly been affirming for me too (in that it's helped me realise my many weaknesses!), and I'm reasonably confident (without being complacent) that I'll be able to demonstrate that attending theological college is a wise thing for me to do.

A special thanks to my prayerful and financial supporters.

Fitness First

2008-07-29T17:38:00.002+10:00

Fitness First is not the name I'd give the local gym. I'd say Jesus first, then my family, then ministry, and then, perhaps, fitness.

But alas I've now succumbed to signing up for a year of sweat sessions (thrice weekly) at the local Fitness First.

I figure if MTS is getting me prepared for a life of vocational ministry, I'd best establish some sort of habit to ensure I get, and stay, physical fit.

It seems that at first you loose more money than fat, but hopefully I can keep up my 3 visit per week habit and so make it worthwhile. Supporters, you know what to pray for!

New email address

2008-07-22T15:24:00.001+10:00

If you would like to email me, please use my new address, which is written in the 'comments' section under this post.

A Very Special Tent - now for sale!

2008-07-21T11:18:00.002+10:00

I think I can now better appreciated the idea of God resting on the sabbath after all his work of creating. After a year-long effort, A Very Special Tent is completed. It is available for $19.95 through Emu music and Koorong bookstores.

(http://www.emumusic.com/albums/averyspecialtent)

What do I think about this album?

Well, I truly believe it's like no other kids album in the world. This could be taken as a positive or a negative comment, or somewhere in between (which is how I think of it at present). Basically, the theological content is deeper than what I'd guess kids are usually exposed to. And that's been done purposefully. When I liked a film or CD as a kid, I'd listen to it over and over and over. Gradually, I'd learn new things from the material through repetition, and I guess my hope is that if kids like this CD they'll do the same. There's not much on the album that can be used congregationally - it's more an 'in the car' kind of album. Some singing participation is encouraged through the songs themselves, but often the songs are written so that I can 'teach' by singing. Personally, I'm disappointed at the lack of theologically sound music available for children. There's only so many times a kids can yell "Jesus is my superhero" before it becomes trite and shallow. A Very Special Tent seeks to challenge this problem head-on.

The music is not 'safe'. It's unashamedly bold in presentation, and this has been done because a) my personality and taste comes through in how I play and write, and, b) because I want to target older kids; kids who are 'too cool for Colin'; kids who fit in the 'tweens' category, and as such are often left out when it comes to children's christian resources.

As with all my projects, I look back and think of things I could have done better or differently. But at the moment I'm happy to say A Very Special Tent is the best thing I've ever done musically. Once upon a time I wrote heavy metal songs to ridicule Christians. Now, by God's mercy, I write heavy metal songs to build them up. To God alone be the glory!

For a review of the album, go to:

http://solapanel.org/article/a_very_special_tent/

Eli Henry Pakula

2008-07-21T10:55:00.006+10:00

Eli Henry Pakula was born on April 25th 2008 (Anzac Day) at 8:40pm. He weighed 4.15kg (a little over 9 pounds) - with no health problems. Stacie and I are ever thankful and delighted at this beautiful addition to our family, as we have been since the moment we heard his first little cry.

He was born through emergency C-section, after an induced labour failed to produce any dilation (at 40 weeks an 10 days - the most overdue the hospital allows for). Basically, his shoulders were a tad too broad to allow him to become fully engaged. The surgeons had to increase the incision length and use forceps to pull him free. If you're going to have a first birth, why not do it with drama eh?

Eli is now 3 months old. He's regained the front half of his head of hair, and started loosing the 'strip' at the back. He loves baths and showers, and he smiles when mum and dad do silly things with high pitched voices (which is often).

As for me, I'm determined to be a godly father. That means teaching Eli all about the wonderful saving relationship he has with God through the death and resurrection of Jesus. As the head of my household (under Christ), I have a special responsibility in this area. The Bible teaches that I'm to lead my wife (with sacrificial leadership and love) and to teach my children so that they're not rebellious. This means I'll have to give calculated and loving discipline to Eli, and put his (and Stacie's) needs ahead of my own. Clearly, I'll need prayerful support in this area.

Okie, lotsa changes, but all good

2008-04-04T11:42:00.003+11:00

All sorts of things I need to tell the blog world.

1. I've recently had my preliminary interview at Moore Theological College regarding theological study commencing next year. The interview went well and I'm now filling out the application form.

2. EMU have agreed to the distribution contract for the album. This means it will be advertised and sold through the regular EMU channels (such as Koorong and Moore books). It has also meant that the album has been reduced to 10 songs rather than 14, and targeted at only the upper primary and 'tweens' range. Therefore it's all 'older kid' stuff and heavier over all than the last CD. I'm very happy with this arrangement, and the (now final) track list is as follows.

1. Intro

2. Knowing Jesus as my boss

3. A very special tent

4. Powerful love

5. When Jesus Christ returns

6. Say 'no' to sin

7. Thankyou God

8. The rock

9. Reading: Romans 7:21-23

10. Now no condemnation

11. Always in God's presence

12. Psalm 1 song

3. I'm about to be a Dad! Well, really, I've been a Dad since the little Pakula was conceived, but he/she is very soon to come out! Stacie is doing well over all, although she finds it hard to get good sleep at night. Our friends and family have been very generous in giving all the bits and pieces that babies need, especially my parents and Stacie's parents, and we're both very happy and thankful. Pray for a problem-free birth!

That's all for now folks. Stay tuned for pics of the little one :)

EMU contract

2008-03-11T11:55:00.002+11:00

News flash!

EMU music (http://www.emumusic.com.au/) has kindly offered me a retail contract for the new album, and are also happy to negotiate a distribution contract. Should the distribution contract go ahead, there will be a large burden lifted off my shoulders in terms of advertising and payment for CD replication.

Please pray that God's will be done in terms of these negotiations!

Also, here's a draft copy of the new album cover; the skilled artistry of Rowan Hamilton. Enjoy :)

Purchase details

2008-02-19T13:31:00.003+11:00

With any luck, A Very Special Tent will be available from Koorong by mid-April, for around $20.

Provided I get my act together, it will also be available for mp3 download from iTunes, for roughly $16.

Members of St Michael's Anglican Cathedral Wollongong will be able to pre-purchase the album for $15 each.

As you can probably guess, I'm completely flat-out with recording work, but the end is nearing fast!

Garry Bennetts, the Rector at Georges Hall Anglican Church had this to say about A Very Special Tent:

“Ben’s songs help me in one of my most important tasks in life, to teach my kids how much God loves them, how to trust Jesus and how to read the Bible.”

I love endorsements!

Album update

2008-02-14T14:56:00.005+11:00

18/02/2008 - just edited this post to include updated track listing.

The expected release date for the album is the first week of April this year. The material is targeted at upper primary age children (where there's a real lack of good Christian music) and overall, the sound is heavier and more 'mature' than on 'We Will Follow Him'. I've recorded some songs suitable for toddlers and infants, but they'll be listed as 'bonus tracks for little ears' at the end of the CD. Although it will be a good resource for children's workers at churches, I think this album will find it's place in the car CD player the most confortable.

Here's the updated track listing (still subject to change)

1. Intro

2. Knowing Jesus as my boss

3. A very special tent

4. Powerful love

5. Intro (saying 'thankyou' to God)

6. Thankyou song

7. The Rock

8. Intro: rant about prosperity gospel

9. When Jesus Christ returns

10. Reading: 1 Thessalonians 2:8

11. 1 Thessalonians 2 verse 8

12. Reading: Titus 2:11-14

13. That's why we say 'NO' to sin

14. Reading: Romans 7:21-24

15. Now no condemnation

16. Always in God's presence

17. Reading: 1 Timothy 1:15a

18. Christ Jesus came into the world

19. Reading: Psalm 1

20. Psalm 1 song

Bonus tracks for little ears

21. Hooray for Jesus!

22. Reading: Matthew 6:31-33

23. Make Christ Jesus number 1

I've only got one more recording session before I've finished all the tracking. Then comes the kids! I'll be having a meeting with the principal of Claremont College tommorow do discuss times for recording the kids. Once that's done, it's off to mastering and then to manufacture.

A special thanks to all those who have prayerfully and/or financially contributed to the recording of this album!

Things I've learnt over 2007

2008-02-14T14:55:00.000+11:00

This one is especially for the supporters who allow me to eat and live whilst I learn to be a minister of the Word and Prayer. There are many things I could write under such a heading, but I’m going to be brief and get straight to the really big important things.

1. Ministry is hard work.

And no matter how many hours I put in (not that ministry can be measured in hours), there is always something more I could be doing. Thus I have learnt that I should never expect to ‘complete’ ministry, as one may complete a building project. I still fall into the problem of assessing my effectiveness in terms of hours put in to ‘get the job done’, but I’m getting better in this area. I’ve learnt to be a bit more comfortable about not being seen in the office from 9-5, especially when I have bible study or youth group in the evening.

2. The important ministry training: learning how to live whilst doing full-time ministry!

Hopefully I’m becoming a better bible study leader, a more effective evangelist, a more proficient preacher, and a more concerned carer. But over all, the real training happens when I work out how to do all these things day-to-day, without going nuts, or compromising my marriage, or needing a lobotomy. It’s not all about doing things better, but about living life the way God intends whilst working as a minister.

3. God, Jesus, Bible…

The classic ‘cover all bases Sunday school answer to any question’ really has something going for it. ‘God, Jesus, Bible…’ is actually a good way do define the ‘core’ of ministry. I’m dependant on God because I’m unable to do things properly by myself, and therefore prayer is always necessary.

Jesus is to be central, because all ministry is about seeing people come to, and grow within a right relationship with Christ.

The Bible is of course the authority in all matters of faith and conduct, and therefore it needs to be applied to my life as I apply it to others. This necessitates regular Bible reading, which I’m still working at!

4. I’m keen to continue!

The Ministry Training Strategy (MTS) gives people a ‘hands-on’ experience of vocational ministry. This helps people decide if a career (for want of a better word) in full-time ministry is something they can do long term, and therefore get further theological education. With all the ups and downs of MTS so far, one thing has remained consistent (apart from God and the gospel etc): I love it! Even though I fail at many things and have tough days, I still feel ‘at home’ in full-time ministry. It’s something I’m keen to keep doing, and something I enjoy doing. I’ll be organising an initial interview at Moore Theological College within the month.

A big thanks to all the supporters for allowing my to do MTS in 2007 and continuing to support me in 2008.

News just in...

2007-10-28T12:53:00.000+11:00

It has been decided (officially) that my new kid's album A very special tent will NOT be released before Christmas this year. It will be released in April 2008. I'm sorry to all those who were eagerly awaiting the CD to purchase as a Christmas present, but I think it's the right choice given that the CD will be better quality.

I'm especially to grateful to all the kids from St Mics who sang on the first kid's session this week, and to the parents that allowed them to stay (especially those that stayed late!). Not all of what was done at this session will be on the final product due to the fairly stringent editing process, however, all that was done has helped the album production significantly. I'll try and get some photo's up from this session in the near future.

Meanwhile, Stacie and I are taking a holiday together - our first holiday since Easter this year. We'll be splurging on spa baths and massages and then perhaps visiting some good friends.

More Recording!

2007-10-24T09:58:00.000+10:00

With the exception of 2 guitar solos, and 2 vocal tracks, my parts in the recording of the new album are complete. That leaves the kids: the biggest 'wild card' in terms of completing this project by the self-imposed release date (2nd week of December). This album is going to be much bigger than the last, and has cost much more to produce, which I believe is reflected in the superior sound quality. The amount of stress involved in getting this project complete is comparable to preaching at an Easter Convention with one hour's preparation. But under God, I can see that it will happen.

The confirmed title of the album is: "A Very Special Tent"

The track listing will most likely be as follows:

1. Knowing Jesus as my boss - Based on Philippians 3:1-11

2. A very special tent - Biblical theology of the tabernacle (fulfilment in Christ)

3. Jonah song - No idea what'll happen with this one!

4. His powerful love goes on - Based on Psalm 136 (the heaviest, craziest metal song)

5. Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners - Based on 1 Timothy 1:15

6. The Rock - Based on Exodus 17:1-7 -> 1 Corinthians 10:4, Isaiah 8:13-15 -> 1 Peter 2:4-10. This one's a real rocker.

7. 1 Thessalonians 2 verse 8 - Speaks for itself!

8. Thank you song - There's always something we can thanks to God for!

9. Now no condemnation - Based on Romans 7:7-8:2

10. Little tents - Based on 2 Corinthians 5:1-10 and 2 Peter 1:13.

11. Always in God's presence - As opposed to 'sometimes in God's presence'!

12. Return to me - Based on Malachi 3:6-7 and Zechariah 1:2-6

13. Make Christ Jesus number 1 - Based on Matthew 6:25-34

14. Blessed is he - Based on Psalm 1

God willing, the album will be sold in Koorong bookshops, and also available for download from iTunes in mp3. I'll organise for pre-orders at a reduced price (probably $15 each) within the month.

Meanwhile, enjoy some pics from the most recent recording sessions - vocal and keyboard.

Once again, the magical Dream Theater shirt enhances the quality of the vocals.

Note the 'disturbed' smile. Result of hours of vocal tracking and loads of caffeine.

"My God is so big!"

Too cool for keys...

Coffee... the only way Adam and I can keep working until 1am.

War, Death, and a Holy God

2007-09-13T13:25:00.000+10:00

Our church has been looking at the early chapters of 2 Samuel, in which many wars are fought and many people die. This raises the question "how can God command his people to not murder, yet assist his people in the mass-slaughter of their enemies through war?" I wrote the following article in anticipated response to this issue. Enjoy.

Throughout the narrative in 2 Samuel, and much of the Old Testament, God both commands and oversees mass killing. To be “devoted to destruction” was often the fate of the inhabitants of the land Israel were to take over in Joshua. In 1 Samuel, God directly commands Saul to “go and strike Amalek and devote to destruction all that they have”, and to “not spare them, but kill both man and woman, child and infant, ox and sheep, camel and donkey” (1 Samuel 15:3). In Judges, Sampson kills more people in his final act than he had killed during his lifetime, and his success is clearly attributed to God (Judges 16:28-30). David slays a countless number of Israel’s enemies with the help of God, especially in the early chapters of 2 Samuel.

The slaying of the enemies of Israel (and therefore, the enemies of God) is sometimes portrayed unashamedly as brutal, relentless, and often coming as a result of God’s anger. Furthermore, where God oversees (and even personally carries out) the mass killing of Israel’s enemies, Israel, on many occasions, celebrate in joyful song. For example, Moses and Miriam sing joyfully after witnessing God drown the Egyptian army in the Red Sea (only a short time after God had slain all the Egyptian firstborn sons!). On the day that Deborah and Barak defeat Jabin’s army (commanded by Sisera – see Judges 5) they sing a song unashamedly boasting their God-given victory; a song that spells out the details of how Jael hammered a tent-peg through Sisera’s head.

Notice however, that the God who enables David to defeat the Philistines is also the God who commanded “you shall not murder” (Exodus 20:13). The God who killed all the Egyptian firstborn sons is also the God who is “of purer eyes than to see evil” (Habukkuk 1:13). The God who destroyed Sodom and all its inhabitants by fire from heaven, is the same God who takes “no pleasure in the death of anyone” (Ezekiel 18:32), and the God who will eventually throw people into the “lake that burns with fire and sulphur, which is the second death”, is also the God who is patient towards people, “not wishing that any should perish” (Revelation 21:8 and 2 Peter 3:9).

These apparent inconsistencies often cause people to question the goodness or holiness of God, or the reliability of the scriptures, and often with good reason! I certainly don’t wish to serve a God who is inconsistent in his word, or who is bent on death and destruction. Therefore it is worth spending time to resolve this issue, and to this end I’ve written a number of small arguments informed by scripture. These arguments are written for the benefit of Christians – people who know the whole Word of God to be infallible, and the final authority in all matters of faith and conduct, thus I will not address the problem of apparent unreliability of scripture. These arguments don’t come close to dealing with this issue comprehensively, but they are intended as spring-boards to help us think through the issue in a constructive way.

1. A simple deductive argument.

Premise 1

If we know all scripture to be God-breathed (2 Timothy 3:16), then we must accept that the God who reveals himself as a God who personally carries out mass-killings, is the same God who commanded “do not murder”. We must accept that the God who “struck down the firstborn of Egypt” is the same God whose “steadfast love endures forever” (Psalm 136:10).

Premise 2

Scripture reveals God as perfect, holy, just and good. “The ways of the Lord are right” (Hosea 14:9)

Conclusion

Therefore, we need to work out how the God who both commands against murder, and who commands mass-killing, does so whilst being perfect, holy, just and good. The burden in not on us to question whether or not God is holy, or whether or not he is consistent.

Therefore, we are not questioning the truthfulness of the revelation of God’s character in the scriptures, rather, in submission to his word, we are seeking to find how it is that God remains holy and perfect whilst commanding against murder, and commanding mass-killing.

2. God’s plan and God’s desire are different things[1]

Based on what we read in scripture, we can assert categorically that God does not desire that an innocent man be murdered. At the same time, we can assert categorically that God planned that Jesus be crucified an innocent man. That which God desires to happen, is not necessarily that which God plans to happen. It is therefore conceivable that God does not desire to see people put to death, whilst at the same time he is carrying out his plan as the Sodomites are slain. This doesn’t give a comprehensive or satisfactory explanation as to how God can destroy entire nations and be too pure to look on evil whilst being perfectly holy and consistent. It does however serve to demonstrate that God is complex and beyond human understanding (Job 11:7), and that therefore we should readily concede (or at least accept it is possible) that God is indeed holy and consistent whilst he commands against murder and yet destroys his foes.

3. The punishment for sin is death

Sin is so abhorrent to God that initially his reaction is to blot out man from the now corrupted creation (Genesis 6:5-7). That any human remain alive is due solely to the profound mercy and patience of God, who causes the “rain to fall on the righteous and unrighteous alike” (Matthew 5:45). Therefore, when God brings about the death of 40,000 Aramean food soldiers through war (2 Samuel 10:18), he is simply bringing to fulfilment the punishment for sin that awaits all people. In his patience he often delays the inevitable, but when the sin of sinful people becomes so testing to his patience (such as the rampant sexual immorality of Sodom, or the unceasing grumbling of the Israelites who demanded meat in addition to manna) he sometimes brings forth the judgment proscribed. War, which results in mass-killing, is one way God chooses to do this.

The scriptures teach that “all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23) and that the “wages of sin is death” (Romans 6:23). As all sin is, in the end, rebellion against God (Psalm 51), then all death comes as punishment from God. As the Egyptians drowned in the Red Sea, and as Annanias fell down dead before the Apostles, God was carrying out the punishment that all people are subject to on account of sin. In some cases, God seems to intervene with the natural order to strike down sinful people (take Nadab and Abihu in Leviticus 10:1-3 for example), and in other cases, he allows the curse of Genesis 3 to simply do its work, as people die of natural causes (“return to dust”). God exercises his sovereignty over all death to bring about his good plans, and sometimes, this means bringing death to many people all at once (such as the Egyptian army, to demonstrate his saving acts of kindness and his power to destroy evil). It is vital to note that this side of Christ, the human agents God uses to carry his punishment are official authorities (Romans 13:4-5).[2]

4. Human agency

Just as God uses prophets to speak his words, so too he uses his servants to bring about judgment for sinners. God doesn’t need human prophets to speak his words, because he’s fully capable of speaking with a voice from heaven (Mark 1:11 is one of many examples). Likewise, he doesn’t need a military leader to bring judgment on a nation (Sodom being a good case in point), but often he chooses to work through human agents. It is reasonable then to assert that when God commands “do not murder”, he is not foregoing his right to bring death to sinners through human agency.

5. Murder and death are different things

Murder is not so much concerned with death in general, but the means by which death occurs. When God gives the command “do not murder” in Exodus chapter 19, he does so whilst speaking to Moses from Mount Sinai. In the preceding chapter, God commanded that anyone who approaches the mountain would be “stoned or shot”. This implies that the death visited upon the disobedient Israelite was to be carried out by a person or persons capable of stoning or shooting. If someone had approached the mountain whilst God was giving the command “do not murder”, presumably, God would have instructed someone to stone or shoot the offender such that they die. Murder then must be understood as an unlawful means of bringing about death, such that bringing about death is not necessarily wrong intrinsically.

Put simply, God commands “do not murder”, but he does not command “do not execute”. Upon this basis we may conceive of war as a means of mass execution that is not unlawful in God’s sight. It was God’s plan that Abel died because like all people, he was a sinner who would return to dust. It was not God’s will that Abel be murdered by Cain, because murder is clearly repulsive to God, and in itself a sinful act. But when David killed Goliath, Goliath received the penalty for his sin, whilst David did not sin in the process of carrying out that penalty on God’s behalf. This distinction between murder as a means of death, and death from some other form, shows that God can approve of the death of sinful people whilst disapproving of murder. As death is a direct result of sin, God can also express his reluctance to see death occur (Ezekiel 18:32), whilst at the same time being sure to bring it about for all people (Hebrews 9:27).

Furthermore, we can be sure that God makes the distinction of sinful and non-sinful ways of bringing about death, on the basis of what we read in Deuteronomy 10:4-7, where God provides for the wellbeing of a person who accidentally kills his neighbour “without malice aforethought”. And if malice aforethought characterises a sinful killing, then it is impossible that God kills with malice aforethought, for God can never sin. When God brings about death then, he does so in all righteousness, whilst his human agent (should he be using one) does so either with or without righteousness.

6. The gospel perspective

In the gospel then, God gave the penalty for sin (death) in all righteousness, whereas his human agents (those who crucified Christ) did so in sin, for they committed murder. The gospel shows us that God can plan for the murder of his own Son, whilst standing aloof from the moral depravity of death itself. Only God in his infinite wisdom and sovereignty is capable of such a feat. In the same breath, Peter preaches that Jesus was “delivered up to the definite plan and foreknowledge of God, [but that people] crucified and killed by the hands of lawless men” (Acts 2:23). The gospel shows us that God acts in order to bring about the abolition of death all together, and that he achieves his goal by undergoing death himself (in the person of Jesus). Put simply, God uses the sinful murder of Jesus to bring about an end to death. Thus when God assumes sovereignty over a fallen world, he does so without compromising his holiness and goodness. Upon this basis we may assert that when God commands David to completely destroy the Philistines in battle, he does so in righteousness even though he is displeased by death.

I hope these arguments are helpful. If this is an important issue for you, please heed the words of Paul in 2 Timothy 2:7: “Think over what [the scriptures] say, and the Lord will give you understanding in everything”.

And by the way, if you're Jewish, HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!!!!

[1] See Blueprint - a series of doctrinal studies produced by Matthias Media for further discussion on this topic, chapter 9, p93.
[2] By way of speculative digression, perhaps one may argue that God still strikes down sinful people by divine intervention to the natural order, as with Annanias and Saphira (though I know no one who’s witnessed such thing), however, it seems equally plausible to argue that because God’s wrath was poured out on Christ in his death, his patience will no longer be infringed upon to the point where he intervenes with natural order until the final day of judgment.

Baptism

2007-08-20T09:27:00.000+10:00

Well, as promised, here's an immersing post for my recent Baptism!

Basically, Stacie and I rounded up the rellies (Jew and Gentile alike) plus a random bunch of friends (whoever we could find really!) and packed 'em in to the cathedral building at St Michaels.

My uncle Martin (a fellow Jew from my family) and his wife Jenny were flown in from Melbourne to partake in the bash. The Rev. Sandy Grant made things official, we sang some ye olde familiar hymns ('Amazing Grace' and 'When I Survey' included), the Bible was read by Jenny (exceptionally well), and Martin explained the passage (Mark 10:13-31) for the benefit of all present. Afterwards we feasted on the gormet (pronounced 'gore-mett') delights of Tony's Chicken Shop catering package. Somewhere along the way Sandy poured a jug of water over mi noggen. And there was much rejoicing.

There's a few things I consider especially noteworthy.

Firstly, there were people amongst my Jewish family who were brave and supportive enough to make the trek to Wollongong and come to the service in the cathedral. For this I was especially thankful. These members of my family demonstrated that they were loving enough to stretch their comfort zones, and I was humbled by their efforts. This includes my brother Aaron and his girlfriend Angie who came from Canberra, and also my Safta (Grandmother) who came from the Eastern Suburbs along with my cousin Kolya and his wife Symone. As far as I know, they all lived to tell the tale.

Also, I once again need to thank my Mum and Dad for their kind and willing support for me regardless of their stance toward the Bible. Both have been very helpful towards Stacie and myself, and both have come to hear me preach at church.

Many on Mum's side of the family were also there, including some long-time family friends (Norma and Geoff, and Vanessa, who pretty much fit in the 'family' category anyway!) and for them it was no less an effort. Mum lives on the Central coast, and many of my family live in the north/north-western side of Sydney. Once again, I was especially grateful for their efforts for something they knew was important for me.

The invitations, RSVP's, tables and catering were all organised by my wife Stacie, who did a sterling effort. I've resolved to give her a good gift (sometime) in appreciation of the exceptionally hard work she put in for the bash. She's certainly got the knack for being a minister's wife! Many thanks to Dad who made the catering possible, and who, along with Jodie (his wife) took the photo's displayed here.

I think the most important thing that happened throughout the day is that the good news of how people can recieve eternal life through Jesus was explained (especially well) by Martin. That I personally have accepted the good news of Jesus, and come to trust in him as my Lord and Saviour, was what was being symbolised by the Baptism itself. Martin was brave enough to say exactly what God has always been saying through the Tanach and the New Testament all along, and out of a sincere love and concern for my family and friends, he issued the challenge for people to serisously consider the claims of the Bible for themselves. Martin showed clearly how being 'religious' and being 'good' are of no value for receiving eternal life; and that what matters is whether or not you follow Jesus. It is upon this basis that it is completely acceptable to maintain a Jewish heritage (with all its practices and cultural nuances), whilst being a committed follower of the Messiah Jesus. I wait with great hope and anticipation that there will be people in my family who come to recieve eternal life by trusting in Jesus - whether Jew, Gentile or Pagan or 'whatever'. A copy of Martin's talk is available under the 'bible talks' section of Lionel Windsor's website (http://www.lionelwindsor.net/). My sincerest thanks to Martin and Jenny for all their work and support.

A little or a lot?...

..The whole jug!!!

...and down my back... (note the cheeky grin on Sandy's face!)

..."it was THIS BIG!"... (My uncle Martin mid-sermon)

"Let's get down to serious business"! (My Auntie Jenny mid-bible reading).

The drum on recording

2007-08-03T13:07:00.000+10:00

The peaceful neighbourhood of Beverly Hills endured an onslaught of skin-smackin, wood-crackin drum tracks for the new kids album, from Monday through Wednesday of this week. Thanks to God, I beat the deadline of 3 days to do all the tracks - perfect timing (pardon the pun).

It looks like the new album will have 14 tracks which is substantially more than the last. I broke 7 sticks during the sessions, which gives some indication as to just how heavy the heavy songs are going to be.

Here's some pics... enjoy.

Adam at the desk...

Smakin out da grooves...

Kick drum cam...

"Take no prisoners!"

Working on the lick...

NB: the drum tracks would be of inferior quality had it not been for the adornment of the Dream Theater shirt worn during tracking.

Don't just pass over this post!

2007-07-18T13:22:00.000+10:00

Almost every year since I was born, I have celebrated the Passover meal with my Jewish family.

The Passover celebration is designed to remind Jewish people of what God did in the Exodus. But unfortunately, the tradition has become much more important than the Passover itself. Most Jewish people know the tradition, but they don’t know anything about the meaning of Passover. I suspect that this is because most Jewish people seldom read their Tanach (Old Testament).

I'm going to make some observations on what the Bible says about Passover. There are lots of things we learn from looking at the Passover in the Bible - far more than I can say here.

I'll talk about what I think are the really big points.

1. There is only one true God

In the book of Exodus, we learn how God rescued his people Israel from slavery under the Egyptians, and God also showed that he alone is the True and Living God, and that all the gods of the Egyptians are false gods.

The Egyptians believed in Gods that looked amphibious. So God sent a plague of frogs on the Egyptians. The Egyptians believed in gods that gave their crops a good harvest, and so God sent hail to destroy the crops of the Egyptians. The Egyptians believed in a Sun god (if I remember correctly, their Sun god was called 'Ra' but I could be confusing my idols!), so God sent a plague of darkness.

And so in the Exodus, God shows that there is no other true god. There is only one true God; the God of Israel; Yahweh.

2. God is a God of Judgment

This one true God; the God of Israel, is a God who brings judgment. He brings judgment on all the false god’s of Egypt, but in the end, he also brings judgment on the Egyptians themselves, and especially on Pharaoh, the king of Egypt.

When Pharaoh the king of Egypt saw that there were many Israelites, he was scared of them and he put them into terrible slavery (as we read at the begining of Exodus). But the slavery didn’t stop the Israelites from having more and more children, so then Pharaoh ordered the death of every firstborn boy from the Israelites. Egyptians believed that their Pharaoh was himself a god, and so when the true God of Israel (Yahweh) brought judgment on all the god’s of Egypt, this included Pharaoh. Pharaoh had ordered the death of all the firstborn Israelite sons, and so God, in the Passover came to judge Pharaoh by slaughtering all the Egyptian firstborn sons.

As we read in Exodus 12:12

On that same night I will pass through Egypt and strike down every firstborn—both men and animals—and I will bring judgment on all the gods of Egypt. I am the LORD.

Note that as soon as God declares he will bring judgment, he then states emphatically that he is Yahweh ('LORD' is the way modern tranlators write 'YHWH' from the Hebrew). God will bring judgment to show that he alone is the true God. God brings judgment for many reasons in the Bible, but the reason he brings judgment here is to show that he alone is the True and Living God.

Many Jewish people today don’t believe in God. Many Jewish people today believe in new-age spirituality and eastern religious philosophy. But in the Passover God want’s to make it crystal clear that there is no God besides him.

3. The Passover teaches us that all people deserve judgment from God.

This is a teaching that many people find hard to accept. Most of us think we’re good people. And according to human standards, most of us probably are good people. Most of us, I presume, would not murder. Most of us would not rob from banks. But when God looks at us, he looks at our heart. God knows all our deepest thoughts and desires. And God is a perfect and holy God; he will not accept evil as part of his good creation. The Torah says very clearly, that all people deserve judgment by God. If you're not convinced, have a look at Genesis chapter 6 verses 4-6.

When God comes to judge the Egyptians by slaughtering the firstborn male, the Passover teaches us that he could also slaughter the firstborn from amongst the Israelites. If God would simply spare the Israelites from judgment, he would not have had to give them the Passover instructions. But as we read in Exodus, a judgment did occur on every Israelite house during the Passover, but it was a special kind of judgment. For theologans it’s a big term: we call it substitutionary atonement. Substitutionary atonement in the Passover means that instead of the firstborn son being slaughtered, God said they could have a firstborn lamb slaughtered instead. The lamb is a substitution or a replacement for the firstborn son.

The teaching is clear: all people fall under God’s judgment, but to some, he gives a substitute (or 'replacement') to take the judgment instead. This brings us to the next big point:

4. The Passover teaches us that God allows for substitutionary atonement.

As we read from verse 3 of Exodus chapter 12:

3 Tell the whole community of Israel that on the tenth day of this month each man is to take a lamb for his family, one for each household. 4 If any household is too small for a whole lamb, they must share one with their nearest neighbour, having taken into account the number of people there are. You are to determine the amount of lamb needed in accordance with what each person will eat. 5 The animals you choose must be year-old males without defect, and you may take them from the sheep or the goats. 6 Take care of them until the fourteenth day of the month, when all the people of the community of Israel must slaughter them at twilight. 7 Then they are to take some of the blood and put it on the sides and tops of the doorframes of the houses where they eat the lambs.

The lamb that is slaughtered and eaten is to represent the household. If the household is small they might only need ½ a lamb. If it was very large they might need more than one lamb. If there is any lamb left over then it had to be burnt, as we see in verse 10. This shows us that the lamb must be the right amount to substitute for the people in the house. The substitute is exactly what is needed to save the people from judgment.

Being the eldest son in my family, if I was there in Egypt during the Passover, I'd be a nervous wreck; desparately hoping that the slaughtered lamb was a sufficient substitute lest God come and strike me down!

But we know that substitutionary atonement works, because of what we read in verse 13:

13 The blood will be a sign for you on the houses where you are; and when I see the blood, I will pass over you. No destructive plague will touch you when I strike Egypt.

When God sees the blood of the firstborn lamb, he knows that judgment has already come to that house, so he will not come to slaughter the firstborn son of that house.

Why is this such an important teaching for Jews (and non-Jews) today?

The Bible teaches us that there is a day where God is coming to bring judgment on the whole world. The Tanach (Old Testament) and also the New Testament make it clear that all people will face God in judgment (the Jewish prophet Malachi states this plainly in chapter 4 of Malachi). And just like God cut-off the firstborn from Egypt and they were slaughtered, so too will all people be cut-off from the life God has given them. If you are cut-off from the eternal life-giving God, then you will face eternal death. In the Bible, 'eternal death' is synonymous with hell.

But God has given the Jews their own special substitute. It's the same special substitute he gave for the whole world. When God sent his son Jesus into the world, Jesus was slaughtered like the Passover lamb. In fact, Jesus is referred to by Jewish people of his day as 'our Passover lamb' (1 Corinthians 5:7) or as 'the lamb of God who takes away the sin of the world' (John 1:29). Jesus was slaughtered just like the lamb, so that the people inside the house of Jesus would not be judged by God. The Bible says that if you are a Christian, your body is just like a house that Jesus lives in. He lives in you by his Holy Spirit. And when God comes to your house to judge you for your sin, he sees the blood of Jesus, and he will pass over you, and you will be safe from judgment. This brings me to point 5:

5. Jesus has given us the true Passover.

The lamb was not a good enough substitute. Jesus was (and still is) the Son of God, so his blood is much more special than the blood of the lamb. When Jesus gave his blood for us, he did it so that we would NEVER have to face the judgment of God. No matter how much we have made God angry by our sins, God will NEVER come to slaughter us in judgment, because he always sees the blood of Jesus, and he knows that the price has been paid for our sin forever.

The true meaning of Passover is found in the gospel of Jesus Christ. People don’t need to slaughter a lamb any more to be safe from God’s judgment. All we need to do is trust in Jesus, because he is the real Passover lamb who was slaughtered so that God would pass over us and not bring us into judgment.

If you do not trust in Jesus; if you are not a Christian, then there is no blood to cover you when God comes to judge. God will not pass over you; he will bring judgment upon you, and you will not be with God in heaven.

Trusting in Jesus Christ is not about doing good things all the time to make God happy. It’s about having his blood cover you, so that God will pass over you and you will not face judgment. There is no need for Christians (including Jews who have become Christians) to celebrate the old Passover, because we have the real Passover; we have the blood of Jesus that takes away all the judgment of God. Gentile Christians should not be fooled into thinking that there is somehow something 'spiritually special' about the Jewish Passover celebrations today. The true reality of Passover is found in the death of Jesus Christ, and therefore only Christians (Jew or Gentile) have the real Passover.

More random stuff

2007-06-19T18:06:00.000+10:00

Sorry it's been a while - I've been sick for the last week, during which Stacie had to endure a bed soaked through with sweat (the human body is an amazing thing), and I managed to read up to the 5th Harry Potter (horridly addictive books they are).

The recording of the demo is now all done except for the kids, which may have to be done on the first week back of school due to the delay. I'm very impressed with how it turned out. Adam has done a good job with the mixing and editing - it sounds better than the quality of the 'We Will Follow Him' album. With any luck, I'll be allowed to perform one of the songs at this years MYC (Mid Year Conference), at which there will be university students from lots of different campuses coming to spend a week learning what the Bible teaches about church.

I've also noticed I need to put more effort into my financial support raising for this year. If you're someone who's happy to give up $5 a week (that's basically a happy meal or a rented DVD) and keen to support me as I learn to become an effective minister of the Word and Prayer, then put you money where your prayers are and drop me an email: pakman2005@dodo.com.au

I realise I need to submit a few 'outstanding' blogs (self-imposed). I've yet to give my thoughts on Passover, and tell the story of Muthu's conversion (it's a real neat one), and get some shots of the family. Perhaps I should submit such posts on the condition that I get a new supporter for each one! (Frugal Jews and their economic strategy!)

Oh, and for anyone interested, next week Sunday I'll be preaching a sermon on the 2nd paragraph of the Nicene creed; the bit that says 'Begotten, not made...'. IF you want to know how my last sermon went (Isaiah 55), go to Lionel's page and download the MP3 from the 'Bible Talks' section.

Hope everyone's well :)

My first sick day!

2007-05-31T11:20:00.000+10:00

Not the most positive thing to do a post for, but none-the-less, here I am surrounded by a white snow-storm of used tissues with a lightning bolt headache and thundering throat. Illness is often what it takes for the good Lord to boost-up my immunity to the 'I'm not expendable' virus that becomes so debilitating in ministry.

Only last week had I declared boastfully to my supervisor that, since starting MTS I've not had a single sick day. And who says God doesn't have sense of humour? I had a stomach bug that very night, and now not only am I bed-ridden with a flu, but I've finished the first Harry Potter book and don't own the second! And as for the reflux from this morning's garlic-infested omlette...

Perhaps more alarmingly, I'm to give a sermon on Isaiah 55 this Sunday at the morning church meetings (8am and 10am). The sermon is nowhere near presentable yet (neither am I), so I'll be doing some 'last minute' therapy on Saturday. I feel like I'm back at uni.

This means I'll be taking an extra day off next week; a week which is getting shorter by the minute.

Herein lies an important lesson for me to heed as a ministry trainee. Ignoring an illness (or any regular bodily or psychological needs) is really ignoring the truth that God is in control and will complete his work the way he sees fit. The reason this is sometimes harder to swallow than an echinacea pill is because I have this dreadded fear that someone might secretly begin to think I'm lazy (which, to make matters worse, is sometimes true!).

The cure is simply to worry more about what God thinks rather than other people, and I can see this will be a continual struggle for a sinful person such as myself.

Anyone can comment!

2007-05-19T23:52:00.000+10:00

My uncle helpfully pointed out that my blog didn't allow comments by people not registered with blogger.com. I foolishly hadn't realised you could simply change the settings to allow comments from anyone!

The situation has now been rectified and all people (bloggers and non-bloggers alike) can post to my site. Hooray.

Here, there is no blogger or non-blogger, nerd or geek, MTS apprentice or profesional minister; but all are one in BLAK!

Sermon on MP3

2007-05-18T22:39:00.000+10:00

The first sermon I preached as an MTS worker was on Phililppians 1:12-26. Unfortunately, I couldn't get a recording of my pulpit debut, however, I had to give that same sermon at the evening congregations at my church last Sunday. This time the recording toys did the job, and my supervisor Lionel has uploaded it to his personal web page where you can download it and then give me as much criticism as you like

Go to http://www.lionelwindsor.net/bibletalks/ and download 'Philippians 1:12-26'.

Spidey

2007-05-08T23:36:00.000+10:00

Ooh - there's one thing I forgot...

I saw Spiderman 3 on Saturday with my friend Simon, his better half Micah, and her 5 year old Sebastian, who was quite a charming talkative young man. I'm sad to say that in my humble opinion, it was overrated. Such is life.

Random news

2007-05-08T22:26:00.000+10:00

Sorry it's been a tad longer than usual since my last post. MTS has meant life is busy, and as of late, I've realised I need to be more disciplined (and at times, outright aggressive!) when it comes to sticking to a good timetable. Sleep hasn't been the best lately - I've had a couple of nights where I've laid awake in bed and then gone into the 'man room' (the room in the house reserved for the drum-kit, guitars, amps, computer and recording gear) to entertain myself in the hope of getting bored and eventually sleepy.

Much to my suprise, I think I'm a morning person. This is a big and tough thing for a musician to admit, but there's no denying that on the days I sleep in I feel like I've got jet-lag, and the quality (and quantity) of work I do diminishes substantially. If you're one of my financial supporters, feel free to give me a morning wake-up call to ensure that your money is well spent!

On a most positive note, I've had the pleasure of seeing a young man come to trust in Jesus as the Lord and Saviour in this last week. The conversion story is priceless - so much so that I'll leave it for a post all on it's very own. However, for the prayers out there (hopefully all Christians), you may like to thank God for revealing himself to Muthu (he's Indian) through his word (the Bible) such that Muthu has been rescued from the coming wrath and made one of God's adopted children through the blood of Jesus. You may also like to pray that God continues to work by his Spirit to grow Muthu in maturity in Christ. No matter how busy and tough MTS gets, I can see it's still an awesome job!

In other news, I'm planning to have a baptism this year on August 4th. There are a number of reasons I've waited so long to get doused in tap water as a sign of the spiritual transformation that has taken place in me. And I bet you'd like to know some of them! If so, drop me an email at pakman2005@dodo.com.au or ask me in person. Such secret knowledge is not meant for the world of blog just yet.

Finally, I've got another sermon coming up in a few weeks. The passage is Isaiah 55:1-9, which looks (and probably is) harder than Philippians 1:12-26. I've got a few ideas about the text, but Isaiah is a large book and I'm battling issues in my brain about the whole 'past-tense-future-prophesy' thing (OT scholars and theo nerds will understand - I think the word is 'proleptic' but I could be mistaken). And then there's the whole issue of how chapter 55 fits into the context of the surrounding chapters (a minefield of 'servant songs', Idol mocking, salvation offers, Cyrus' anti-exile ruling and a whole host of words on judgment and condemnation for Israel). Is 'Israel' refering to the 10 Northen tribes under the line of Jeraboam? Or is it all the children of Abraham (Israel and Judah)? Or is it the 'servant'? Of course there seems to be an obvious focus on blessings to the Gentiles (Nations) which is fulfilled by Christ dying for the sins of not only Israel, but for all the world. But for the sake of exegesis I want to make sure that I understand the prophesy in a way that the original hearers would have, before tracing the fulfilment in the gospel and subsequent application to Christians today. So many questions! Feel free to give me your thoughts and ideas on the passage. I'm going to try and do a lot of work before I come to the BST series commentary on Isaiah by Barry Webb (a theologian whom I hold in great esteem - who's most likely just finished his new commentary on Judges!).

Anyway, that's enough dabbling in nerdism for now.

Recording update (for the teckies)

2007-04-08T09:00:00.000+10:00

Thanks to God, on the day I recorded the drum tracks for the 'single', it turned out I was able to manage a 'double'! I got drum tracks completed for two songs rather than one. Those familiar with the recording process will understand why this is a notable achievement.

Therefore, when it came time for recording guitars and keyboards (last week Friday) I had a big day ahead of me.

On the first song 'A Very Special Tent' there are two acoustic guitar tracks and one electric guitar track. The two acoustics's were identical parts and I panned them around 90% left and 90% right respectively to get that famous 'immersing stereo effect'. I put the electric in the middle for the choruses with a very small nip of drive. Thanks to my friend Dave Gray for the use of a nice Ibanez S series electric.

On the second (bonus) track, 'The Thankyou Song', I did two electric tracks for each chorus (stereo panned again) and one during the verses. I used a Fender Tele through a small tube amp with loads of tube preamp to get that 'bluesy' drive. I also used an acoustic (by room mic)throughout the whole song to give it that percussive 'strumming and picking' edge.

The second of the two tracks is markedly heavier due to the blues drive on two electric tracks, and I wanted therefore to record it in D rather than the original E. I used dropped D tuning on the electrics so I could get the added low-end 'punch'.

However, the fact that kids would have to sing on this track (eventually) somehow escaped my mind for the session, and only afterwards when I was driving home singing along to the unmixed, unedited version of my tracks did it occur to me that it could be a tad low for the kiddies voices to sound comfortable. With kids songs, this is a very big problem!

With children, whether they are vocally competent or not, a song needs to be 'accessible' and feel as 'natural' as possible, because the aim is that they sing along with joyous abandonment. So, I spent a few days telling myself I'd simply have to re-do the guitars (and keys) and that therefore, I'd made a $100 mistake (the price of half a day's recording at mates rates). But thanks be to God (again), Colin Buchanan came to the rescue! Karyn Grant (a music teacher) went through a Colin Buchanan song book and looked at some of the lowest notes that the kids sang on his CD's. She found a G# below middle C, and lots of A's too (the now lowest note in my song). If Colin can get away with those notes than so can I! And with that the drama was over.

For the first time in my kid's music recording experience, I decided to include a keyboard track. Adam (the recording teckie) had a nice 70's organ sound (through MIDI) which worked well with 'The Thankyou Song' choruses. I'm not much of a keyboard player, but I quickly taught myself the parts and laid them down faster than any of the other tracks I'd done that day.

So, all-in-all, this second effort of children's Christian music looks like it will be more technical in terms of recording and mixing. I think the sound will be more immersing for the listener, and the 'nip' of overdrive used even in the (primarily) acoustic tracks should make this next album more 'crisp'.

And yes, there will be more 'heavy metal for kids' type songs in this album too!

If anyone would like a copy of my first kids album 'We Will Follow Him', or, if you would like to pre-order my second album (which I hope to finish before Christmas this year), then send an email to pakman2005@dodo.com.au.

Family stuff part 1

2007-04-02T08:57:00.000+10:00

Just been browsing some of the photos that Stacie and I had taken with our digital camera (a gift we're most grateful for) over the last 2 years. I found some nice family shots with my brother Aaron, my sister Miranda, my uncle Martin, auntie Jenny, cousins Asher and Rachel. I realised there's not many of mum and dad, so these snaps constitute 'part 1' of Pak's family stuff.

A very happy birthday to Miranda today - the teens are over!

Here's Miranda on the left, myself on the right, and Aaron being part of the stain-glass window.

And here's some crazy Pakula's! Left to right: Rachel, Myself, Asher, Jenny and Martin.

More to come.