Bayou Renaissance Man

Weird, disgusting - and a valuable lesson, too

2009-12-06T22:20:00.001-06:00

I've never understood the urge for deviant sexual behavior in some individuals. I'm not talking about a taste for the mildly kinky or unusual, you understand: I'm talking about the way-out-there fringes of sexuality, the sort of thing that makes one wrinkle one's nose in disgust. I wouldn't blog about such incidents at all if it weren't for the fact that, as a former chaplain, I've had to deal with many sex criminals in prison, and I understand the extent of the danger.

Two recent reports illustrate a very real truth. Such deviance usually can't be successfully treated and cured. It's the same thing with pedophiles - they're not curable. Sure, there are those who claim that as long as the 'patient' is taking his or her medication, they're 'under control': but these incidents highlight just how dangerous that supposition really is. It's almost impossible to guarantee that they'll continue to take their medication, or that it'll continue to have the desired effect. If they stop taking it, or if it ceases to work for them . . . danger lurks.

The first story to catch my eye came from South Carolina back in July.

A South Carolina man was charged with having sex with a horse after the animal’s owner caught the act on videotape, then staked out the stable and caught him at shotgun point, authorities said Wednesday.

But this wasn’t the first time Rodell Vereen has been charged with buggery. He pleaded guilty last year to having sex with the same horse after owner Barbara Kenley found him in the same stable and was sentenced to probation and placed on the state’s sex offender list.

Kenley said she noticed several weeks ago her 21-year-old horse Sugar was acting strange and getting infections again. She noticed things in the barn had been moved around — dirt piled up and bales of hay stacked near the horse’s stall at her Lazy B Stables in Longs, about 20 miles northeast of Myrtle Beach.

“Police kept telling me it couldn’t be the same guy,” Kenley said Wednesday. “I couldn’t believe that there were two guys going around doing this to the same horse.”

She spent several nights at the stables, which are about four miles from her home, but didn’t find anything. So she installed surveillance cameras, and when she reviewed the footage from July 19, she couldn’t believe she was seeing the same man doing the same thing to her horse.

Kenley didn’t call police because she was certain the man would come back to the stable, and she wanted to make sure he was arrested. So she staked out the barn and caught Vereen inside Monday night, chasing him to his truck and holding him with her shotgun until police came.

“He said he wasn’t there to do anything, and I said, ‘I know you were. I have you on tape.’ And then he said he was sorry if he hurt me,” Kenley said.

Vereen, 50, was first charged with trespassing, but police added a buggery charge after watching the surveillance tape. He faces up to five years if convicted. Vereen was already on probation after pleading guilty to buggery last year and was sentenced to three years of probation, ordered to stay away from the Lazy B Stables and declared a sex offender.

There's more at the link, including a video report.

The second story was from Maine.

When Gary Moody pleaded no contest to trespassing in 2005 for hiding in a pit toilet on White Mountain National Forest property in New Hampshire, a judge urged him to seek help for whatever had driven him to climb down there.

According to a new complaint, Moody didn't get the message.

The 49-year-old Pittston man is charged again – this time in federal court – with climbing into a pit toilet in the White Mountain National Forest.

Authorities say a 9-year-old boy saw Moody climbing out of a toilet at the Hastings Campground on Memorial Day and two other witnesses saw him walk away from the outhouse. The campground is about three miles south of Gilead, just east of the New Hampshire border.

Moody was not identified at the time, but a special agent from the U.S. Forest Service investigated the report from the campground manager. Recalling the well-publicized incident involving Moody in 2005, special agent William Fors paid a visit to Moody's home on June 19.

. . .

According to Fors, Moody admitted that he had been in a toilet at the Hastings Campground on Memorial Day. Moody initially said he had dropped his shirt into the pit and climbed down to retrieve it.

That story was similar to one Moody had told authorities on June 26, 2005, when he was found in a toilet on U.S. Forest Service property in Albany, N.H. Moody said he climbed into the pit to retrieve his wedding ring, but officials cleaned out the pit, screened the contents and found no ring.

"I told Moody that I did not think that his trips into the outhouse pits had anything to do with dropping things by accident, and asked Moody if I was right," Fors wrote in the affidavit. "Moody said 'yes.'"

Moody admitted that he had gone into outhouse pits more than twice, Fors wrote. Moody said he never took photographs or videotaped people using the toilets, and he told Fors that he had not received counseling for what Fors called "the outhouse problem," according to the affidavit.

Moody faces one count of attempted violation of privacy, one count of entering an enclosed area not open to the public and one count of leaving refuse in an exposed and unsanitary condition. Each count is a federal misdemeanor, punishable by a maximum of six months in prison and a $5,000 fine.

Again, there's more at the link.

I apologize if any readers are offended at my linking to these stories. It wasn't done out of prurient preoccupation, I assure you! I hope that they illustrate how difficult - well-nigh impossible! - it is to treat such deviant behavior, and prevent offenders from re-offending. Admittedly, no harm to humans resulted from the behavior reported above: but who's to say that would continue to be the case? When might such deviant urges 'cross the line' and become dangerous?

Next time someone tries to persuade you that the more extreme forms of sexual deviance are quite harmless, really, and shouldn't be condemned or punished . . . remember these two cases as examples. In the same light, ask yourself whether a pedophile can be treated. He or she can't, of course - they're as likely to re-offend as the subjects of the two reports quoted above. The only two ways I know that are certain to prevent them re-offending are permanent incarceration, or death.

Let that reality guide your response - and your precautions to safeguard your loved ones.

Peter

Doofus Of The Day #297

2009-12-06T22:10:00.000-06:00

Today's award goes to two would-be burglars in China.

Hapless crooks spent more than a month digging a tunnel through solid rock into a jewellery store - only to be arrested the minute they stepped out with their loot.

Lu Peng, 26, and Xian Tsu Heng, 27 - carrying gold and gems worth 50,000 UK pounds [about US $82,500] - found police waiting for them as they emerged from the 100ft tunnel dug underneath a main road in Jiangyang, eastern China.

Cops had had the tunnel under observation for a week after motorists reported a dip in the road.

"They told us they had been inspired by a crime featured in a reality TV programme about a police task force - but they didn't get away with it in that one either," said a police spokesman.

Hint to tunneling robbers - either reinforce your tunnel, or dig it deeper, so that it can't be followed by the dip in the roadway above it!

Peter

Meeting the Christmas consumer demand

2009-12-06T22:00:00.001-06:00

The Daily Mail has published two articles on gigantic warehouses stuffed full of Christmas goods to meet shopping demand in England. I'm sure there are many such warehouses in this country as well. The pictures are daunting, to say the least . . .

Here's the Amazon.com warehouse in England:

And here's a liquor warehouse belonging to a firm named Constellation Park:

It apparently contains 36 million bottles of wine, and can store 9.5 million gallons (enough to fill 15 Olympic-size swimming pools).

There's more information at the respective links, including more photographs. Worth a read if you want to know what a consumer Christmas looks like, and the amount of work involved in supplying what we order.

Peter

The trials and tribulations of our host

2009-12-05T22:14:00.004-06:00

As mentioned earlier, Miss D. and I are staying with Oleg in Nashville, TN for a week or two. We've been joined by two more guests, a man known to many on The High Road forum as 'Twoblink' and his wife, who've just returned to the USA after several years abroad.

Yesterday Miss D. and Twoblink hatched a plot to reorganize Oleg's home (well, actually, his whole life - he's a bachelor, after all!). I enthusiastically joined in as soon as I heard about it. While they went to the range today, I went shopping, and came back with snap-together shelving, lots of plastic storage boxes, file folders, cleaning materials, and so on.

As soon as everyone came back from the range, and Oleg had disappeared into his study to work on some photographs, we struck. His kitchen was the first to 'feel the heat', with every drawer, cupboard, nook and cranny being ruthlessly emptied, cleaned, reorganized and restructured. Miss D. wielded the vacuum cleaner with merciless efficiency, sending Gremlin the cat (shown below) into a fit of frustration because he couldn't figure out how to kill the roaring monster she was pushing.

When Oleg came downstairs and found new shelves gracing his dining-room annex, filled with boxes, and the rest of his kitchen looking remarkably different from its previous state, his face was an absolute picture! I'm sorry I didn't have a camera ready to capture the moment. Anyway, once he got over the shock, I think he decided that he likes the idea.

I cooked jambalaya and red beans with rice for supper, and a good New Orleans-style feed rewarded the hard labors of all concerned. Tomorrow, Miss D. is threatening to wreak havoc among the papers, bills and envelopes that are stacked on one of the kitchen counters, and file folders and sleeves are ready to hand for the mayhem to commence. I'm looking forward to Oleg being able to actually find the bills he has to pay for once!

Peter

"Making a monkey out of professional photographers"

2009-12-05T22:05:00.003-06:00

Ananova reports:

An orangutan is making a monkey out of professional photographers after becoming one of the world's most popular snappers.

Nonja's handiwork has been viewed by tens of thousands of fans after keepers at Vienna's Schoenbrunn zoo in Austria gave her a digital camera and set up a Facebook page for her.

Snaps from the digital camera, which issues fruit treats whenever a picture is taken, are uploaded instantly over a WiFi link.

The slightly blurry images of Nonja's climbing rope, food and her companion's shaggy red-brown fur have won lots of admiring comments from fans.

"It's an attempt to see the world through her eyes and see what she thinks is important. She's very artistic," said one keeper.

Nonja turned to photography after a spell as a painter where her works often reach up to £2,000 at auction.

I love the idea, and it's great that the orangutan is able to use the camera. Her Facebook page is here, with many of her photographs on display.

Peter

Photograph of the day

2009-12-05T21:58:00.002-06:00

NASA has released an amazing image of the starlit sky above Mount Everest in its Astronomy Picture of the Day for December 5th. Here's a reduced-size version to whet your appetite. (It's in the public domain, so I can copy it for the purpose without breaching copyright.)

For the full-size version, click here, then click the image again to enlarge it.

Fascinating! Thanks, NASA, for continually publishing great images like this.

Peter

RIP, Richard Todd

2009-12-05T21:42:00.003-06:00

I'm saddened to hear of the death of the British actor, Richard Todd.

He played in many war movies during the 1950's and 1960's, and I recall seeing him in many of them. The big difference between him and many other movie actors was that he fought right through World War II, and in a very heroic role indeed - as a paratroop officer. He was one of those who dropped into Normandy on the night of June 5/6, 1944, immediately before the dawn of D-day, to secure the bridges across the Caen Canal and the Orne River in the British sector of the bridgehead. His unit reinforced that of Major John Howard, who commanded the operation. Fittingly, Todd was to play Major Howard and re-create the seizure of the bridges in the classic war film 'The Longest Day'.

Rest in peace, Mr. Todd, and thank you for the memories you recreated for so many of us.

Peter

Light blogging tonight

2009-12-04T22:34:00.000-06:00

Miss D. and I arrived safely in Nashville, Tennessee late last night, and are staying with Oleg for a couple of weeks. I was a bit worried about an eleven-hour car journey while still convalescent, but I needn't have been: my chest stood up to the journey with no real problem. It's been a bit painful today, just to remind me that it's not fully healed yet, but nothing that a painkiller or two couldn't deal with. Given that I'm only eight weeks post-surgery, I think that's doing fairly well, all things considered.

It's not much colder up here than in Louisiana at present, somewhat to my surprise - last time I was with Oleg in winter, I froze my tootsies off! Apparently my home town is supposed to get some snow flurries tonight, and they'll reach us in Nashville tomorrow night, so I guess I'd be cold wherever I was.

Oleg spent much time today photographing Miss D., to their mutual enjoyment. Keep an eye on Oleg's LiveJournal for some of the results, which should show up by late this weekend or early next week. Judging from the comments I heard, a good time was had by all.

Tomorrow we're all going shooting, along with other friends of Oleg who arrived tonight. With my chest still recovering from open-heart surgery, I won't be shooting anything with heavy recoil, but I can always have fun with .22 rimfire guns while my friends shoot the bigger stuff. It'll be nice to get some recoil therapy after almost three months without it.

I'll have some more blog posts ready for tomorrow night.

Peter

Enterprising, inventive, but not on the timetable!

2009-12-04T22:24:00.003-06:00

Six train fans in Germany are in hot water after their latest escapade.

Train buffs are facing jail after building their own ramshackle locomotive and taking it on the public rail network.

The six-seater train - made out of garden furniture and salvaged train parts - was powered by an electric motor and even had its own refreshments car in the shape of a crate of beer.

Police in Erfut, Germany, were alerted after residents of properties adjoining the railway spotted the unorthodox vehicle - and were aware that there should have been no traffic running.

Police however had to call in a helicopter to find and follow the makeshift train as the police cars could not follow it along the tracks.

The helicopter pilot was able to radio ahead to other officers who set up a makeshift barrier at a station to stop it.

Railway bosses had been asked to suspend all services to avoid a collision although the train buffs had chosen to have their drive when there had been no trains scheduled.

"It seems to be one of those mad pub ideas that actually happened. They didn't seem to realise they could have caused a serious accident if they'd got anywhere near a real train," said one officer.

Er . . . yes, well, quite! A+ for enthusiasm and initiative, but F for planning, I'm afraid!

Peter

A scary-looking landing!

2009-12-03T23:30:00.001-06:00

I'm sure many readers have seen video clips of aircraft landing at St. Maarten airport in the Caribbean. Here's one such clip, out of many on YouTube and elsewhere.

Reader D. M. sent me this picture of a KLM Boeing 747 landing at St. Maarten. It's taken from a higher vantage point than the beach, and thus shows more clearly than the video clip just how very, very close the aircraft comes to the beach, the road, and the perimeter fence when landing - particularly its wheels. Talk about a close shave! (Click the picture for a larger view.)

After seeing that, I don't think I want to land there in a large aircraft, thank you very much! I'd prefer something smaller, which doesn't have to strain to use every available inch of runway.

Peter

Doofus Of The Day #296

2009-12-03T23:20:00.000-06:00

Today's Doofus comes from Germany.

A luckless crook surrendered to police after four robberies flopped in the same day.

Ralf Lautenbach, 24, fled after trying to hold up two hotels which set security guards on him - and then abandoned a break in at the local tax office in Muelheim an der Ruhr, Germany.

Finally the failing would-be crook handed himself in after he was trapped in his getaway car after using it to ram a bank security cash van.

"He needs a change of job," said one officer.

Indeed he does! - but I'm not sure I'd recommend him to any other employer. With an accident-prone record like that, just think of the damage he could do in an honest job!

Peter

They're not 'hunters' anymore, they're 'locavores'

2009-12-03T23:10:00.000-06:00

I hadn't heard the term 'locavore' until I came across a New York Times article about a boom in hunter education for urban residents in the North-East.

THE call to forge deeper connections with the food we eat has pulled thousands to the nation’s farmers’ markets, sprouted a million backyard seedlings and jump-started an interest in scratch baking, canning and other county-fair pursuits.

Now add hunting to the list. Novice urban hunters are forming classes and clubs to learn skills that a few generations ago were often passed down from parent to child.

Jackson Landers, an insurance broker by day, teaches a course here called Deer Hunting for Locavores. Mr. Landers, 31, started the classes earlier this year for largely urban adults who, like him, did not grow up stalking prey but have gravitated to harvesting and cooking their own game.

He tailored his course to food-obsessed city people with lessons on deer biology, habitat and anatomy, and rounded out his students’ education with field trips to a firing range to practice shooting and a session on butchery and cooking. One of the last lessons covered field dressing a freshly killed deer. As the students gathered around, Mr. Landers produced a hunting knife and explained its gut-hook feature, which promised to open the deer “like a zipper.”

“I’d never fired a gun before,” said Michael Davis, 44, a graphic designer and a student in the class. “I grew up in Southern California. We surfed, we didn’t hunt.”

But Mr. Davis, a self-described foodie, said he needed to understand what it means to hunt for food.

“I think going through my life without at least experiencing that most primal thing of hunting would be cheating,” he said.

It was a taste for wild boar that spurred Nick Zigelbaum, 26, and Nick Chaset, 27, to form a hunting and dining club in San Francisco that they call the Bull Moose Hunting Society. The society, founded in 2007, was designed to appeal to young urban residents looking to expand their horizons.

The club now has roughly 55 dues-paying members, many of them in their 20s and 30s, who hunt for boar, pheasant and waterfowl together. They share local hunting knowledge and the spoils of a good day in the field at semi-regular events they call boar-b-ques and wild food dinners.

Mr. Chaset, who is now attending graduate business school in Washington, D.C., recently established a chapter of the club there. The founders hope that someday they’ll have a chapter in every major American urban area.

Nationwide, the number of hunters has been in decline for decades. The country’s shift from rural to urban life is the main reason, said Mark Damian Duda, executive director of Responsive Management, a survey and research firm that specializes in natural resources and outdoor recreation issues.

According to his firm’s research, only 22 percent of hunters now say they hunt primarily for food. Most say they do so for recreation or to spend time with their families.

“Thirty years ago it was about half the hunters who were hunting for food,” Mr. Duda said.

The connection never completely faded, though. Some American chefs who grew up with rifles in their hands have long been passionate about wild game, even if the law forbids them from serving it in their restaurants. The subject has also been taken up recently by the writers Michael Pollan, who shoots a wild boar in “The Omnivore’s Dilemma,” and Steven Rinella, who chronicled his quest to kill a wild American bison in “American Buffalo.” But until recently, tree stands and Mossy Oak camouflage were rarely mentioned in the same breath as, say, heirloom tomatoes.

Anthony Licata, editor of Field & Stream magazine, said he wasn’t surprised that a new generation of eaters was discovering what traditional hunters have known all along: “There’s nothing more organic and free range than meat you hunt for yourself and your family,” he said.

Mr. Licata, who is 35 and lives in New Jersey, said he thought interest in hunting among young urban locavores was bound to grow. “When you do hunt and if you’re lucky enough to fill your freezer with venison and feed your family, it’s a powerful thing,” he said. “They aren’t going to want to stop.”

Mr. Landers, who tries to take Virginia’s full limit of six deer a year, agreed. For the cost of the necessary licenses, $36.50, he said he can stock his freezer with nearly free protein.

He also argued that for the environmentally conscious, hunting is fairly carbon neutral.

“If you can shoot a deer in your own backyard, butcher it there, that’s zero food miles,” he said.

There's more at the link.

I'm pleased to hear of this trend. A lot of people don't realize that most of the funds for State natural parks, and fish and wildlife resources, are directly drawn from the sale of hunting and fishing licenses, plus taxes on the sale of related products. The less hunting that goes on, the less the various States are able to fund their wildlife programs. If we can attract more people to a very healthy outdoor activity, we'll also benefit wildlife as a whole - and people will be able to harvest food when times are tough.

Peter

Quote of the day

2009-12-03T23:00:00.002-06:00

The blog Do Over, one of those linked in my reciprocal blogroll, published an article titled 'Wildlife Menu' back in September, which I've just got around to reading. From that article, I took this quote about Texas red ants.

one of the ‘little’ red ants tried to bite my foot off and when I stomped him his whole family crawled in my shoe.

Just FYI .. sitting down on the neighboring anthill to remove your shoe .. not a good plan. No matter how bad your foot hurts do not let the ants ‘trade up’. Dancing on the anthill wishing you hadn’t gotten out of bed that morning is not really any improvement on an already bad plan. Trying to spontaneously develop the ability to levitate in order to take off your drawers without putting a foot on the ground … not a good backup plan. I suspect they’re called fire-ants because dousing yourself with gasoline and lighting yourself on fire is the only way to get the little buggers off. kerosene maybe.

I wonder if you can cross an anteater with a rhino….

There's more at the link. Very funny, and worth reading.

Peter

Another great commercial

2009-12-02T23:09:00.003-06:00

I had to laugh at this commercial for Levi jeans. I understand it came out some years ago, but not being much of a television watcher, I wasn't aware of it before now.

OK, that's funny! I'm glad they managed to make it both sexy and suggestive without descending into smut or nastiness. Not too many commercials succeed in that, sadly.

Peter

If your gun collection lacks a fitting centerpiece . . .

2009-12-02T22:58:00.003-06:00

. . . this should do very nicely! The blog Boomers And Bulls**t lists a matched pair of Browning .50-caliber machine-guns for sale. An extract from the details:

(2) 50 BMG Transferable Full Auto Mounted on a EXTREMELY RARE mount from a Greek battleship.

Left and Right-Hand Ma's as a pair are rare in themselves,
Package, will not separate.

Brand New Unfired M3 RAMO Barrels
Stellite Lined with Flash Hiders, Shrouds
Both have Trunnion Protectors

Both Mechanical and Electrical Triggers

Fully Functional In Superb Condition Ready To Rock & Roll

Package includes 1000 rounds and 2 M2 Barrels as well as Transfer Fees

. . .

Friend/Seller says $55k, FIRM.

There's more at the link.

Looks like an interesting set . . . but at that price, and with .50 BMG ammo costing anywhere from $3 - $6 per round, I don't think my money will stretch that far. I could fire off a single 200-round belt of ammo in a matter of seconds, and blow my food budget for two months!

Peter

There's something fishy about these packages . . .

2009-12-02T22:52:00.002-06:00

. . . quite literally!

Anti-terrorist police sealed off an airport terminal after mistaking 140lbs of frozen fish for a bomb.

Armed SWAT teams evacuated terminal one at Hamburg airport, Germany.

They leapt into action after police spotted two blue plastic wrapped packages on an apparently abandoned luggage trolley.

But police smelt something fishy about the packages as they began to melt, filling the departure hall with the unmistakable aroma of rotting seafood.

"We had to assume the worst until we knew what was on the trolley. Luckily just the fish went off, not a bomb," said one officer.

Good thing they weren't trigger-happy, or they might have blown it in plaice! At least the scales of justice were served, this time . . .

Peter

World's oldest cookbook?

2009-12-02T22:39:00.002-06:00

The Daily Mail reports that a cookbook dating back to the time of Richard II (1367-1400) has been discovered.

Dishes of chicken blancmange and porpoise porridge are unlikely to whet the appetite of most modern food lovers.

But such recipes were apparently fit for a king 600 years ago.

. . .

Experts from Manchester University's John Rylands Library, who discovered the manuscript, have translated a handful of its 150 recipes, which are written in Middle English and date back to 1390.

They include frumenty, a porridge-type dish made of bulghar wheat, chicken stock and saffron, and payn puff, a dish of boiled fruits wrapped in pastry.

The unusual cookbook, called the Forme of Cury, is believed to have contained dishes to feed servants and the royal family alike.

It gives a fascinating insight into the delicacies of the time, including dishes of swan and peacock. After translating the recipes, historians wanted to try the dishes themselves.

However, with no ingredient quantities or instructions, making the dishes proved tricky. John Hodgson, who looks after the library's manuscripts and archives, said: 'One of the difficulties was that a lot of the recipes were very vague.

'It wasn't like Delia Smith or Gordon Ramsay books at all. The book doesn't specify quantities of ingredients or cooking times, so it was a case of trial and error to get the recipes to suit modern tastes.'

Several meals are being added to the library's canteen menu for visitors to try. Debbie Fletcher, manager of the library's cafe, said: 'It was a real challenge to find some ingredients. Trying to find a porpoise - it's not something you can pop down to the supermarket for.'

There's more at the link.

I'm not sure I'd want to try porpoise porridge, even if some enterprising cook were to prepare it! On the other hand, it might be worth a visit to the Rylands Library next time I'm in England, to sample a few of their medieval wares.

Peter

A novel way to extract a tooth!

2009-12-01T23:43:00.000-06:00

Kudos to the parents for making this fun for their child, as the video demonstrates.

Looks like a good time was had by all!

Peter

Quote of the day

2009-12-01T23:34:00.002-06:00

From the blog E3 Gazette, in connection with the scandal over alleged manipulation of climate data by 'global warming' proponents:

... they didn't just cook the data; they marinated it for a week, put on a rub, laid it in the smoker for a day and a half, sliced it up, wrapped it in bacon, dipped it in batter, rolled it around in the flour, and deep fried it.

Neatly put!

Peter

The wackier side of politics

2009-12-01T23:27:00.002-06:00

There's been a bumper crop of political silliness in the headlines over the past few days.

First, via Rodney Balko, we learn of a candidate for the office of Mayor in Minneapolis who's a bit off the beaten track.

Among the 11 people who want to be mayor of Minneapolis are three people who claim Democratic Farmer-Labor allegiances, one Socialist Worker's Party candidate, a Libertarian and a man from something called the Edgertonite Party ...

Electoral politics in Minnesota have never been dull.

Then there is the fledgling candidacy of one Joey Lombard, a 22-year-old unemployed musician who lists his "political party or principle" as "Is Awesome."

On his Facebook page, Lombard counsels that voters "just fill in 'Joey Lombard is Awesome' as your first choice for mayor, and leave the rest of the ballot blank, it's that simple!"

I called Joey Lombard and asked him what makes him awesome.

"Just in general," he said. "Everybody I know thinks so."

I mentioned that my colleague pointed out candidates were allowed three words for their political party name or principle, and that Lombard seemed to have missed the opportunity to belong to the "Is Totally Awesome" party.

"Arggggggggh, man!" said Lombard, sounding genuinely upset. "I didn't even think of that."

It's possible that political careers were built upon shakier foundations. After all, Minnesotans have elected a wrestler and a comedian, and the state has survived. But I wondered how Lombard decided to run for mayor.

"My girlfriend was always whining about how I don't do enough for the world," said Lombard. "So I said, 'OK, I'm going to run for mayor of Minneapolis and make everybody love each other."

So, even though he quit his job at Macy's ("Not a good idea, in retrospect"), Lombard plunked down the 20 bucks and began to run for mayor. How did his girlfriend respond?

"She thought I was making a mockery of the electoral system," Lombard said.

And his parents?

"At first they thought it was a horrible idea," he said. "They think it is a joke. But they're growing on it."

So, it's not a joke?

"Well, it was at first. But then I looked at the people running, and they don't have any more experience than I do," Lombard said. "I might be able to do some good."

On his website, Lombard says that years of playing Sim City, a computer game that allows the player to build a make-believe city, has given him a good idea of how one should run. "I admit I've never managed a real city," he said.

I told him that prior to being elected, Mayor R.T. Rybak had never managed a city, either.

"That's a good point," said Lombard, who added that his lack of experience also means he is not corrupt. And because he's single, "I can't get into any issues with Argentine reporters," he said.

. . .

Yet, Lombard's decision to think globally and act and run for office locally didn't win over his girlfriend, who was more concerned with cultural domination of the ruling elite.

"She dumped me," he said with sigh. "She said I didn't care enough about hegemony."

There's more at the link.

Intrigued by the mention of the 'Edgertonite Party' in the article cited above, I looked it up. On the party's Web site, we find this mission statement:

The Edgertonite National Party exists to secure political independence for the people of the Midwestern United States and a homeland for the Lauraist religion. We use the term “Nation of Edgerton” to describe the area within a 240-mile radius of Minneapolis, Minnesota. We are a non-traditional Communist party, based on the ideology of Lauraism: the belief that Laura Ingalls Wilder is God, Communism (public ownership of business) is the best form of government, age of consent laws should be repealed, public transit should be returned to the routes, fares, and schedules of 18 September 1970, the Nation of Edgerton should secede from the United States as a Lauraist homeland, and all people, including children, deserve as much personal liberty as possible consistent with public safety and the rights of others. Capitalism is a per se violation of people’s rights by exploitation.

There's lots more at the Web site, if you really want to read it . . . although I can't say I recommend it. Furthermore, retired chaplain and pastor though I may be, I somehow can't see myself officiating at 'Lauraist' services!

Finally, the inestimable Dave Barry pointed me to the tie-breaker in an election for the city council of Crested Butte in Colorado.

Mason and Wilson had both garnered 317 votes in the November 3 council race. That tied them for third place. With four seats open and the fourth place finisher getting a two-year term instead of a four-year term, a recount was triggered at the county. The results did not change, with both tallying 317 votes.

Under state law, the tie must be broken by “lot.” In most towns, a coin is flipped or a card is drawn from a deck of cards.

But this is Crested Butte.

“Roland came up with the idea and it was a lot of fun,” explained Wilson.

When Mason was in college, he and his roommates grew bored with Rock-Paper-Scissors. “So we started doing Ninja-Bear-Cowboy. We’d line up back to back, take three paces and turn and pose like in the Old West,” he said. “We did it to see who got the best bedroom.”

Wilson was ready to try something other than flipping a coin. “It was good because we didn’t know each other very well. If [Mason] knew me better, he’d know I don’t like guns and so would never be a cowboy. I am a bear-ninja inside.”

So at 11:35 a.m. on November 20 in the upstairs hallway of Town Hall, Mason and Wilson stood back to back and began the showdown.

The two agreed to the following rules: It would take two out of three victories to win.

Ninja disarms Cowboy.

Bear mauls Ninja.

And Cowboy shoots Bear.

“It was pretty fun doing it with Phoebe,” Mason said. “Phoebe and I were cracking up and we had probably 10 people watching, wondering what the heck was going on. We wanted to add a little lightness with all the stuff going on right now. Maybe the pro and anti-Snodgrass people could do it and get on with it.”

According to the witnessed affidavit submitted by Hughes, on the count of three, each candidate would turn around and assume one of the positions.

The official document describes the following:

“Round One: Mason bear; Wilson bear: outcome—tie.
“Round Two: Mason cowboy; Wilson bear: outcome—Mason wins.
“Round Three: Mason bear; Wilson ninja: outcome—Mason wins.
“Final outcome: Mason wins a four-year seat. Wilson gets a two year seat.”

The official document will be filed in the Crested Butte Town Hall for a future town clerk to discover and eventually ponder.

“We like to single ourselves out a little bit,” admitted Hughes. “It’s extreme Rock-Paper-Scissors and it worked.”

There's more at the link.

I like the sound of Crested Butte's electoral system. Wonder if we could have a re-match for POTUS between the current incumbent and Sarah Palin, using that system?

Peter

Looks like some veterinary surgeons aren't to be trusted

2009-12-01T23:17:00.002-06:00

The Daily Mail has published an exposé of the shabby tricks of some English veterinary surgeons. Anyone care to bet the same tricks aren't practiced here in the USA?

Having had a comprehensive school education, I went into [veterinary surgery] because I was fascinated by biology and genuinely wanted to help animals. And although my parents had good jobs - my mother was a nurse and my father a radiographer - I was the first person in my family to go to university, and understandably my family was incredibly proud of my achievement.

So, despite the doubts already beginning to form in my mind, I ploughed on. A year after the greyhound incident I graduated and took my veterinary oath, which all vets swear to, promising 'to ensure the welfare of animals committed to my care'.

Back then, I had no concept that far from the saviours of animals they purport to be, the blame for much animal suffering in the UK can be laid so firmly at the door of vets.

I had no idea that I would ultimately be driven to confess that I am ashamed to be a vet and that, eight years after qualifying, I would find myself so disgusted at the moneymaking practices that I would leave the profession altogether.

Of course, not all vets deliberately set out to make as much money as they can out of treating animals. But money - not the welfare of the animal - is often at the forefront of the vet's mind.

Of course there are outright cowboys in any field and the veterinary profession is sadly no exception.

Today you will notice more and more practices have sprung up throughout the country - especially in those affluent areas where the middle-class residents treat their pets as part of their family.

One might imagine that because there are so many more vets that animals need more medical help than ever. But the truth is far simpler. A whole industry has arisen out of squeezing the most money out of treating family pets.

It is not unheard of for vets to Google a pet owner's home to see which area the family live in. Big house in a posh road - well, you can offer more treatment to that pet owner, of course. I never witnessed this in my practice, but I heard of it happening. Charge more for your services so a vaccination that costs a few pence becomes a £35 'consultation'. And that isn't all.

While the owner might believe he or she is only taking their cat for a vaccination (and I have no problem with sensible preventative healthcare) for the vet, this visit can be a way to make even more money out of a perfectly healthy animal.

During the 'health check' which accompanies the vaccination visit, it is amazing the potential 'problems' the vet might find.

So your vet discovers your cat has a seemingly innocuous chipped tooth? I have known of cat owners told that despite the fact their cat is perfectly fine - and frankly animals in the wild break their teeth all the time and do not need expensive dentistry work - that to remove the tooth is justified 'just in case' it later causes a problem.

Having a tooth removed, especially a canine tooth, is major surgery - costing upwards if £100 - and should only be done if the cat is suffering because of it.

But more often than not, a loving owner will trust their vet and sadly go along with surgery that is not only unnecessary but plain risky for a pet who does not need it. Similarly, I have known vets suggest doing an 'exploratory' operation on a cat just because it had been sick. But like humans, cats and dogs get sick from time to time. The best response is to wait and see, not offer a battery of blood tests and invasive operations.

Having allowed their pet to have such an operation, the owner when the pet recovers will put this down to the operation being a success. It is not: if nothing was found, your pet would have begun feeling better anyway. Possibly sooner.

Sadly, the best way to deal with many problems is not to treat at all. Small animals such as guinea pigs and rabbits should be put to sleep if they present with an illness that can't be easily rectified with a dose of antibiotics. Their lives should not be prolonged at all cost.

If your cat or dog gets cancer you should not, in my opinion, subject it to long, torturous treatment. Nor should cats that are run over and experience a complex injury or bladder problems - sadly an all-too-common feature of road accidents as the car catches the back of the cat as it tries to escape - endure lots of operations in the hope that the problems can be cured.

Even if they can be - eventually - I believe putting any animal through this is barbaric.

. . .

But vets aren't only guilty of treating animals when there is no problem. Sadly they are guilty of creating problems in the first place. Take bulldogs. They have been hideously bred to have a characteristic collapsed face. This restricts breathing and stops them panting properly.

Ridiculous as it may seem, they have also created an animal that can't breathe fast enough to have sex. So a bulldog must be artificially inseminated by a vet using a general anaesthetic.

Once pregnant, the bulldog faces another dreadful side effect, again caused by breeding. Bulldogs have such a small pelvis that most are unable to give birth naturally. So 90 per cent of bulldogs require a Caesarean.

If the vet were truly putting the animal first, he would refuse to inseminate a bulldog in the first place. Instead, to ensure the welfare of the bulldog, vets should be insisting that pregnancies only occur in bulldogs that can mate naturally.

But, of course, they won't say that or refuse the breeder's wishes - after all, as a vet you are making money out of all of these medical procedures. An insemination costs around £80 to £300 depending on the exact procedure and a Caesarean £500.

One of the reasons there are so many vets now is that vets have created their own market.

I find it outrageous that, given their role, any vet criticises Cruft's for exhibiting these dog breeds. After all, it is the vets themselves who have aided and abetted these atrocities.

And this practice certainly isn't confined to bulldogs. We have daschunds bred with elongated spines so they look 'attractive' for their breed. But these sausage dogs are prone to slipped discs and back problems which, in turn, makes more money for vets who do many operations a year to 'help' these issues (most of which do not work and cause more suffering to the dog.)

We have cats that can't breathe because of their overly flat noses and weep constantly from eyes that are too large, other cats and dogs without fur that can't go out in the sunshine as they will burn.

The current fashionable craze for miniature dogs is also damaging. These dogs are prized on their tininess - so the smallest dogs are chosen but in reality these are the runts of the litter that used to be allowed to die as they were so weak.

In turn vets are simply creating weaker animals. They are going against the force of nature, Charles Darwin's natural selection. And because weaker animals are surviving they need more medical care from vets who force them to survive.

This is great news for vets and the reason for their proliferation. But surely not for animal welfare, which they pledged, when they took their veterinary oath, to put first.

There's more at the link.

If you own or care about animals, I highly recommend reading the whole article - and then taking it into account when making health care decisions for your pets. It might also help you question some of the services and/or procedures recommended by your veterinary surgeon. If he or she is the 'wrong sort' identified in the article, you should be able to detect that fairly quickly.

Peter

Great animation, funny story

2009-12-01T00:15:00.002-06:00

The video below is a short animation poking fun at the 'Mission: Impossible' series of movies. It's great fun.

Peter

A hugely important Web site

2009-11-30T23:55:00.002-06:00

The Royal Society, the world's oldest scientific institution, has made available on a special Web site sixty of its most historic and profound documents. These are of incalculable importance to anyone interested in the history of knowledge, and particularly to anyone involved with education (even if it's only wanting to make sure your own kids get a decent one!).

The Daily Mail reports:

Landmark moments in the history of science, from a grisly early blood transfusion to Stephen Hawking's theories about black holes, have been celebrated online today to mark the 350th birthday of the Royal Society.

For the first time, original manuscripts of papers published by the world's oldest scientific institution have been made available to the public via the internet.

Among the highlights from the interactive 'Trailblazing' site are Sir Isaac Newton's landmark research on white light being made up by a rainbow of colours and Benjamin Franklin's famous kite-flying experiment to identify the electrical nature of lightning in 1752.

Newton's reflecting telescope, the first such instrument in the world

Also included is a 1770 study confirming the young Mozart as a musical child genius, and Professor Stephen Hawking's early writings on black holes.

They are among 60 articles chosen from among 60,000 that have appeared in the Royal Society's journals. The publications include Philosophical Transactions (Phil. Trans.), the oldest continuously published scientific journal in the world.

There's more at the link.

This is an immensely valuable resource. I've already spent a couple of hours browsing through it, and you may be sure I'll be spending a lot more time there! Here, for example, is a facsimile image of an extract from the original 1671 article by Sir Isaac Newton on light and colors (link is to a PDF image of the article):

That article appeared 340 years ago . . . yet Newton's discoveries are still at the root of all our work with lenses, colors, etc. If you wear spectacles (even non-corrective sunglasses) or contact lenses; if you use microscopes, binoculars, telescopes, telescopic rifle sights, and the like; if you have medical samples taken for laboratory testing; if you use a spectrometer in any shape or form; then you're using the fruits of Newton's research. That's how fundamental this treasure-trove of articles is to our understanding of nature.

I can't recommend this new Web site too highly. Fascinating reading, of enormous historical and scientific importance, and an invaluable resource for school, college or just plain old curiosity about the world we live in. Go read, and learn.

Peter

The 'Bad Sex In Fiction' award for 2009

2009-11-30T23:47:00.002-06:00

The Bad Sex In Fiction Competition was inaugurated by the British Literary Review in 1993. According to its Web site:

The Literary Review Bad Sex in Fiction Award was inaugurated by Auberon Waugh in 1993 to 'draw attention to the crude, tasteless, often perfunctory use of redundant passages of sexual description in the modern novel, and to discourage it'. The prize is not intended to cover pornographic or expressly erotic literature, and is limited to the literary novel.

The nominees, and the passages for which they were nominated, can be read at the Web site. Scroll down that page to see the links.

The BBC reports:

Author Jonathan Littell has won the 17th annual Bad Sex In Fiction Award, for his novel The Kindly Ones.

The book, which was originally published in French, won the Prix Goncourt in 2006 and has sold over a million copies in Europe.

Judges at the Literary Review gave him the bad sex prize for a passage that begins: "This sex was watching at me, spying on me, like a Gorgon's head".

The award was accepted by Littell's agent. He has yet to comment.

In one excerpt, the author describes a sexual encounter as "a jolt that emptied my head like a spoon scraping the inside of a soft-boiled egg".

The Literary Review said Littell's book was "in part a work of genius", adding they hoped the author would take their dishonour "in good humour".

There's more at the link.

Reading those descriptions of sex, I'd say Mr. Littell is a worthy winner - but, on the basis of the available evidence, he might be a less-than-perfect lover!

Peter

HIV-positive soldiers and active duty?

2009-11-30T23:33:00.002-06:00

I note with real concern that the South African Army is allowing HIV-positive soldiers to go on active duty as peacekeepers - in other words, in combat zones. The BBC reports:

A staggering 30% of South African soldiers are infected with the Aids virus.

. . .

After a test case brought by one of South Africa's military unions and the Aids Law Project, the government reviewed the evidence and agreed that in certain circumstances HIV-positive soldiers can be deployed overseas if they pass a battery of some 39 fitness tests.

"It means people who [have] HIV who are for instance on treatment and who have stabilised and meet minimum requirements will now qualify to be recruited deployed and promoted," explains S'khumbuzo Maphumulo, the lawyer in the case.

In what has been called a "nuanced policy", the South African National Defence Force (SANDF) now has to consider each case on its merits and assess the operational requirements of each post.

Aids testing for South African soldiers is voluntary but the reality is that if you refuse to get tested then you will not be deployed.

With greater knowledge of HIV and availability of anti-retroviral drugs - which soldiers receive for free - the South African military has become a world first in effectively removing the blanket ban and setting objective parameters for assessing whether an infected soldiers is fit to be deployed.

. . .

The army has recently deployed an HIV-positive soldier to Sudan as part of peacekeeping operations in the troubled territory of Darfur.

He is the first but there are many others waiting in the wings.

Soldiers taking part in a recent military exercise seem to back the new Aids policy.

"We've had this conversation and it's not really a problem. We would just like to know who is and who is not infected so we can help them if we need to," says Maj Talia Thomas.

As part of the exercise, a helicopter evacuated a casualty from the field.

This is precisely the kind of scenario that critics of the new policy worry about.

All soldiers are issued with rubber gloves in their first-aid kits to protect against blood-borne diseases such as hepatitis and HIV.

During the test case, medical experts said there was no evidence of increased risk of transmission in this way but defence analyst Helmoed Roemer-Heitman is not convinced.

He argues it is a massive breach of trust for ordinary soldiers who expect more from their commanders.

"What we are doing is exposing them to unnecessary risk. It is bad enough to living under harsh conditions and running the risk of being shot at, we are now exposing them to a situation when one of their comrades could totally inadvertently infect them with a fatal disease," says Mr Roemer-Heitman.

The reality is that there are already HIV-positive soldiers operating in peacekeeping missions but their status simply is not formally acknowledged because of a lack of testing facilities in many African forces.

The reason South Africa has taken the lead is in part because the health burden of HIV is so huge.

It has had to balance the human rights of individual soldiers with the collective rights of a nation which expects a fit fighting force to protect them.

Professor Lindy Heinecken, who has researched the issue extensively at the University of Stellenbosch, says we are likely to see HIV-positive soldiers in frontline duties but it will depend what line they do and what the military considers "reasonable and justifiable".

The new policy may pose some tricky diplomatic challenges if troop receiving countries object to having HIV-positive foreign soldiers on their soil.

Eritrea has already made this point and has voiced its concerns to the UN Security Council, asking it to pass a resolution. It argues that its own people's safety is being compromised.

But so much has been invested by the South African military in its troops that it cannot afford to lose qualified staff to the disease.

Mr Heinecken points to the fact that "infection rates are highest in the middle ranks and at the operational level" and so the military has had to take a pragmatic approach given its extreme position.

There's more at the link.

I'm very familiar with the South African situation, having served in the South African armed forces. The immensely high proportion of HIV-positive soldiers in the ranks is largely due to the integration of Umkhonto we Sizwe guerrillas with the regular armed forces after the advent of democracy in 1994. Many of the former were HIV-positive, but were admitted to the armed forces anyway, because to deny them would be to 'discriminate' against them, according to the new government. More have contracted the disease due to its endemic nature in South African society (the country has what is probably the world's highest infection rate).

I share Mr. Roemer-Heitman's concerns. As a combat veteran, I know from personal experience the complications of treating casualties in the field. Many of them may be bleeding heavily; if a vehicle is hit, blood, other body fluids, and even body parts, can be smeared all over the interior. If an HIV-positive soldier has been hit, it exposes those trying to rescue and treat him to the very grave hazard of contracting an incurable and ultimately fatal disease.

This is a classic example of political correctness trumping sanity. I'm glad I'm no longer serving with the South African armed forces . . . it might now become a life-threatening career choice in rather more than the usual military ways!

Peter