Jinky, the Dog of a Hollywood Wife

Paris Hilton is a celebritard who buys puppy mill dogs

2008-06-28T12:51:00.000-07:00

My name is Amber-May and I am a puppy mill survivor. I was used for many years as a breeding mom, working for the boss at World Kennel USA, in Littlerock, CA. They tortured me there and sold my babies to pet shops. Please don't buy our babies in pet shops or on the Internet because it only encourages these bad humans to keep us imprisoned. We deserve better than to be treated so badly. I was sick, used up and almost dead.

I don't know why celebritards like Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Kim Kardashian and Denise Rchards buy our babies. It's wrong. They should adopt from a shelter or adopt a used puppy mill mom like me instead. They are just contributing to animal cruelty.

Now, I live in a beautiful condo in West LA with my new mommy, Arlene Sax. She loves me. Finally, somebody loves me.

Pure-Bred Puppies on Sale! There ain't nothin' worse than being somebody's bitch in canine super-max prison.

2008-06-24T14:21:00.000-07:00

There ain't nothing worse than being somebody's bitch in Canine Super-Max Prison.

Hey you, dummies who buy pets on the Internet and in pet stores (puppy mill fronts), you gotta wise up and learn where your puppies are from. Hint: they're not from a "private, small breeder" where the mommies and daddies are romping through meadows. No way. Lemme tell you, these pet stores that are selling my doggy friends get them from doggie slave internment camps. Those places are worse than the pound because at least in the pound, you might get adopted (I'm one of the lucky ones who made it out of there alive). In a pet factory, you NEVER get out, forget about getting adopted. In a puppy mill, you're in a cage for life with the meanest people on the planet. And when you can't make puppies anymore? They kill you.

Don't worry, I won't show you the pictures here. You wusses can look without wincing. But somebody's got to teach those celebritards Paris Hilton, Britney Spears, Denise Richards and Kim Kardashian that they should adopt dogs and cats, not pay puppy mill fronts in Beverly Hills and Bel Air! What kind of pinhead buys a dog when they are killing 4 million of us in the shelters? Come on! Save a life, will ya?

My Mom explains it in these Rescue Roundtable shows from Doggy TV, produced and directed by Jeff Fleiss.

Posh Puppy in Beverly Hills Closes following Puppy Mill Scandal

2008-05-08T09:25:00.000-07:00

You can read the West LA article by Kelly Hartog here: http://westlaonline.com/wcnp_article.php?articleid=9

Posh Puppy in Beverly Hills Closes Following "Puppy Mill" Scandal
By Kelly HartogEditor, BHCNP

Photo credit: Jim Bursch
The Posh Puppy pet store in Beverly Hills is now closed

Photo credit: Carole Raphaelle Davis
Millie: Just one of 300 dogs rescued from World Kennels USABEVERLY HILLS -

It's taken almost five months of active campaigning by animal rights organizations, but on May 7, the doors of the Posh Puppy pet store in Beverly Hills were shuttered and a 'For Lease' sign was placed in the window.

The brouhaha began back on December 22, 2007, when the Humane Society of the United States, The Best Friends for Animals and the Last Chance for Animals organizations, spearheaded by local actress, writer and animal activist Carole Raphaelle Davis, held a protest outside the Posh Puppy store at 9699 Wilshire Blvd., to make passersby aware that pet stores, including Posh Puppy are merely fronts for puppy mills, that keep their dogs caged in inhumane conditions and breed them until they die."We chose Posh Puppy for its location and visibility," Davis, who has been a spokesperson for Last Chance for Animals for 19 years, told BHCNP.

"This is the place where people buy teacup puppies and we chose December 22, because it was the Saturday before Christmas, which is the biggest puppy-buying day of the year."That protest turned into a weekly sustained movement, where locals, activists and celebrities turned out to make people aware of the shocking treatment dogs undergo in puppy mill kennels. The protests were also designed to encourage people to adopt dogs from shelters. "At least 25% of dogs in shelters are purebred animals, and many of those---particularly the teacup dogs--- are those who were originally from puppy mills," said Davis.

The boon in teacup puppies that can go for up to $4,500 each, has inadvertently been bolstered by the likes of celebrities like Kim Kardashian, Paris Hilton and Britney Spears."I think that [these three girls] alone have done more harm to dogs than anyone else in recent history," Davis said. "These dogs are not fashion accessories, but millions of little girls want to emulate these celebrities."

While the protests went on weekly outside Posh Puppy, Davis along with other animal activist organizations was deeply entrenched in an undercover investigation seeking out the puppy mills that supply stores such as Posh Puppy. That investigation uncovered that one of Posh Puppy's suppliers was World Kennels USA in Littlerock, CA. Authorities raided the kennels on May 2 and removed 302 breeding dogs being kept in severe inhumane conditions.

One of those dogs was Millie ---a 10-year-old Maltese, who is now being fostered by Davis at her home. Millie was so- named by Davis because she was a puppy 'mill' dog. This is the first time Millie has ever been outside of a cage in her entire life. She is scrawny, emaciated, has a urinary tract infection and eye infections. She curls up on Davis's lap and is constantly craving human comfort.

"It's taken five days for her to trust me," says Davis. "When we rescued her she was shaking, trembling and terrified. Her vocal chords were cut in the kennels so she couldn't bark." Millie's story is not uncommon. She's just one of the hundreds of female dogs who have been kept for eight to ten years in a cage, and have been bred twice a year. "People should know, that the cute little puppies they buy in these pet stores have mothers who have been kept in horrific conditions for years," said Davis. "It costs only $67 to adopt a puppy from a shelter," she points out.

BHCNP's interview with Davis took place on the morning of May 7. During our interview, Davis received an email that revealed Posh Puppy's doors were closed and the For Lease sign was posted outside. Davis let out a squeal and shouted 'We did it!' before high-fiving this reporter.Altercations between the protesters and Posh Puppy's store owners John and Michelle Yoon have been common over the last few months. The Yoon's have protested throughout they were running a legitimate business and purchasing their puppies from reputable sources only. However, as of May 7, Posh Puppy's doors in Beverly Hills have been closed, mail is piling up outside the door (including a vet bill from Brent Air Veterinarians) and the store's phone remains unanswered).Posh Puppy has a second store in Tarzana. Calls to that store by BHCNP also remained unanswered.

Davis says while many pet store owners, managers and employees are fully aware of the conditions of the dogs that breed the puppies they purchase, there are also plenty who have no idea of the cruelty and horror the dogs go through. "They don't visit the kennels, they don't ask questions and they trust the organizations that have beautiful Web sites showing dogs being well taken care of. Nothing could be further from the truth," she scoffs. "Which is why," she adds, "it's so important for us to educate the public and make sure they adopt dogs from shelters."

In the meantime, Davis's enthusiasm at the closure of Posh Puppy and the raid on World Kennels USA is a little guarded. "This is bittersweet for us," she said. "We're overjoyed at the newfound freedom of these [302 rescued dogs], but that's just one kennel and one store. There are hundreds of thousands of dogs suffering in terrible breeding facilities, and our hearts bleed for them."BHCNP is continuing its investigation into the puppy mill phenomenon with a series of articles. Please check back shortly for more in-depth reporting on this issue.
2008-05-07
Comments:
carole says:THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING! WE WON'T STOP UNTIL ALL PETSTORES SELLING PUPPIES DON'T EXIST.
Rory Freedman says:Thank God for Carole Davis and all the other activists who took the time and energy to educate the public about puppy mills. That they managed to shut down such a heinous, cruel operation is a testament to the fact that educated consumers want nothing to do with such barbaric, inhumane practices.Real animal lovers know: Animals should never be purchased!

Ed Buck says:Carole just lit the fire in a field ready to burn. To those of us who have been volunteering in rescuses, we often dreamed that we could "do something" about puppy mill vendors. The formula for this store closing was one part activist action (that felt good), and two parts consciousness raising (that did more good).

Capri says:As one of the proud protesters, I am thrilled that this "little shop of horrors" is now closed. I think it is critical to make sure this info (article) is WIDELY cross posted, especially to our children and their friends. Children need the truth to educate the adults who are sometimes to busy to care about God's precious creatures. Spread the word: "Puppy millers love MONEY, not Dogs"! We will prevail for those who have no voices!
Capri says:P.s. Final comment. "Every dog (or cat) deserves a home and every home deserves a dog (or cat)"

carole Raphaelle Davis says:So many people were involved with this investigation and sustained campaign. All the folks from LCA, Best Friends Animal Society, HSUS, Animal Alliance and tons of volunteers. It must be noted that we never wanted to shut them down. We want these puppy mill fronts to go HUMANE. They can sell the accessories, just not animals from pet factories, including cats, birds etc.I am so grateful to each and every activist who stood with us against cruelty to animals. Dogs deserve better than to live out their lives in cages. Now, thanks to you, the public is becomming aware. To other puppy mill fronts in Los Angeles, I have something to say to you:Stop lying to the public about the provenance of these dogs. Stop playing semantics about "licensed breeders." The public is not as stupid as you would like. Go humane now or we are coming to you next. An average dog lover

Tina Clark says:Thank you BHCNP for running this story. It is SO important that everyone learns where those cute puppies come from. Thank you Carole and everyone who came out to the protests for making this happen. We are winning! We must keep educating the public, and shut down these horrible mills for good.

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Posh Puppy Store Exposed on KTLA For Selling Puppy Mill Dogs

2008-04-05T23:37:00.000-07:00

Last Chance for Animals and The Best Friends Animal Society held a press conference today in front of Posh Puppy, a pet shop in Beverly Hills. The animal welfare activists presented evidence of a sixteen week investigation. The dogs sold at Posh Puppy in Beverly Hills and their Tarzana shop are supplied by California puppy mills, where the dogs are kept in inhumane conditions.

Reports that the $21,000 a month lease is available were confirmed yesterday.
Click here to see the broker listing. Posh Puppy is no longer selling live animals in Beverly Hills and will soon be closing its doors.

"The puppies look posh, but behind the scenes, it's not so posh," said LCA spokesperson Carole Raphaelle Davis, pointing to an enlarged photograph of suffering dogs in a mill in Littlerock, CA which supplies Posh Puppy.

"These dogs are outside in the cold, in anguish and dogs deserve better. The public needs to learn the truth," said the LCA spokesperson. "It is unprincipled to buy a dog when we kill four million dogs a year in our nation's shelter system. The shelters are full of beautiful, pure-bred dogs and until the cages are empty, there is no excuse for breeding, selling or buying dogs. This store and other pet shops that sell live animals in Los Angeles are all puppy mill fronts."

Author Jana Kohl made an appearance with her dog Baby, a puppy mill survivor who had her leg amputated because it was broken in the wire cage in which she was confined for nine years. Her vocal chords were cut out so that she would not bother anyone with her barking. Jana Kohl is releasing a book titled "A Rare Breed of Love" about Baby and her long journey from a puppy mill into a loving home.

Below is a full transcript of the LCA statement to the press:

The "posh" puppies' parents are living in canine supermax prisons—puppy mills, where the dogs are kept in inhumane conditions. The dogs are out in the elements, suffering from cold and neglect. They are sick, in anguish, in pain and driven insane by the never-ending confinement to a wire cage. They are bred and bred until they're dead.

LCA has investigated the puppy mills that supply Posh Puppy and other pet shops in LA and have uncovered the truth. These people have lied to the public. The dogs are from mills. We have the proof.

LCA and Best Friends Animal Society want to say that we never intended to put anyone out of business. They can do very well by selling accessories and we have offered to go away if they go humane. We just want them to stop selling live animals in their stores and on the Internet.

Over 30% of the dogs in the shelter system are pure-bred dogs. There is no need to buy a pure-bred dog in a pet shop. The very same dogs are abandoned at the pound, waiting to get adopted for a small fee. It costs US tax payers 2 billion $ /year to house and euthanize these animals. 4 million dogs are killed per year in our nation's shelter system. The pet stores, the puppy mills, and the BUYERS contribute to the crisis of pet overpopulation. It is unethical to buy a dog when we kill 4 million a year. Until the cages are empty, people who breed, sell or buy dogs are unconscionable—unprincipled.

Another thing we want to add is that the public is getting ripped off at pet shops. The puppy mills LCA investigated in Los Angeles County also supply other stores. The posh puppies selling for up to $4000 in the Beverly Hills location have litter mates, brothers and sisters of the same parents, selling in lower rent stores in Korea Town for as little as $500. It's the same dog, basically, with a widely different price. The customer is getting ripped off.

Lastly, I want to congratulate everybody who worked so hard here for 15 long weeks. The whole country is behind you. This is one little store in one little city but believe me, this signals change. I have one thing to say to millers who are supplying pet shops in Los Angeles. Get a cash crop that doesn’t scream.

And millers: don’t think you can hide behind a USDA license. There is a USDA stamp on dead hamburger meat at Ralphs. Millions of dogs are suffering right now in USDA licensed facilities. It might be legal, but that doesn’t make it right.
And I have one thing to say to other pet shops in LA. If you’re selling puppy mill dogs, we’re coming to your store next.

Recently returning from a puppy mill investigation in the mid west, Jennifer Krause of the Best Friends Animal Society was also on hand to answer questions from the press. "This is proof that no matter how nice a store is, no matter if the puppies are AKC registered, no matter what the stores tell you, THIS (pointing to the photo poster of Yorkie in Little Rock) is where the puppies come from," said Jennifer Krause. "A reputable breeder does NOT sell their dogs at a pet store or online. A reputable breeder will ask you to their property and oftentimes screen an adopter. There are thousands of wonderful, cute, loving, healthy animals overfilling LA city and county shelters, many of them purebred. There is no need to breed more when the shelters are euthanizing hundreds a day right here in Los Angeles. By purchasing a puppy online or at a pet store, you are directly contributing to the problem. By adopting at a shelter or from a rescue group, you are not only saving that particular animal's life, but making room for another animal within the shelter system."

Posh Puppy Beseiged by Animal Welfare Protesters

2008-03-22T20:16:00.000-07:00

photo by Charlotte Duncan

Watch the video of the rally: http://youtube.com/watch?v=IyZdkCi-JzQ

The Posh Puppy store of Beverly Hills, California, is entrenched in a ten-week long war of attrition against an organized and experienced group of animal welfare advocates from three national organizations, Best Friends Animal Society, Last Chance for Animals and the The Humane Society of the United States.

Local supporters of the growing anti-puppy mill movement, angered by the proliferation of pet stores that sell miniature “tea-cup breeds” for thousands of dollars, are determined to expose the cruelty behind the pet trade to Los Angelinos. The activists have been hosting a peaceful “pro-adoption/anti-puppy mill rally” at the busy intersection of Wilshire Boulevard and Roxbury Drive every Saturday in front of The Posh Puppy store. The message carried by spirited voices high above the din of traffic is, “Stop! Don’t Shop! It’s kinder to adopt!”
Last Saturday, the activists stepped up the pressure by arriving earlier and staying later. They marched peacefully, many of them accompanied by their own rescued dogs, educating shoppers about the fact that 20% of dogs at the shelter are pure-bred dogs. The protesters hope to win the hearts and minds of puppy buyers by explaining how the pet industry works—that pets from pet stores are supplied by pet factories—puppy mills, where breeding dogs are kept in inhumane conditions. The rally members are intent on exposing the pretty store front for what it is—a front for pet trade professionals to rake in their share of a multi-billion dollar industry, while behind the scenes, animals suffer.

Jana Kohl, psychologist and author of “A Rare Breed of Love” explained why she spends her Saturdays picketing Posh Puppy: “We spend two billion dollars a year in this country to shelter and euthanize homeless animals. When people buy a dog from a pet store or breeder instead of adopting, they are not only signing a death warrant for one of those dogs, chances are they are supporting cruel and inhumane puppy mills. Think of what two billion dollars could do to help children, the poor, our education system. And think of the humane choice you will be making when you adopt instead of putting money into the pockets of animal abusers.”

During the first three weeks of the rallies, Posh Puppy owners John and Michelle Yoon, in a desperate strategy, opted to shut down on Saturdays but for the last month, they have braved the siege by staying open, bringing in extra sales help and hiring a security guard. The rally members have all been mindful of the picket regulations in Beverly Hills, staying clear of the door, so the security guard hasn’t had much to guard. In fact, he spends most Saturdays smiling, chatting and texting on his cell phone in the entrance to the pet shop. In a tone that seemed slightly apologetic, he told this reporter, “Hey, I’m just making a living—trying to feed my kids.”

The activists have been buoyed by their ability to deter just over 70% of customers at the front door. In response, the Yoons have been ushering the few customers that do go in, to leave the store out of the back door. Almost all the shoppers exiting the store have been walking out without having made a purchase. When customers do go in, they are visibly uneasy reading the signs being held up to the large windows that state: “WARNING! The Humane Society of the United States says no reputable breeder will sell to pet stores!” When the store is empty (most of the day) the Yoons and their employees take pictures of the picketers and fidget. They ignore the dogs in the display boxes. But as soon as someone walks in, the show begins. Exaggerated smiles and laughing are produced and they place adorable puppies into the arms of prospective buyers. But even the charms of a puppy are unable to stop customers from furtively glancing outside at the picket line.

John Yoon in Van Nuys Superior Court on Jan. 2, 2008
Photo by Elle Wittlesbach

The owners of Posh Puppy have been struggling to contain reports of the controversy that hounds them. They have attempted to remove a video about the protest from YouTube.com (see above link) and they have threatened to “commence legal proceedings” to prohibit its broadcast. The Yoons have also attempted to remove the many negative reviews about their two stores from several review websites by claiming slander and defamation.

The Yoons, who claim to have a “C” license (an exhibitor’s license with the USDA) have been sent formal requests from Last Chance for Animals and the Washington D.C. offices of the Humane Society of the United States to provide them with a complete list of their suppliers and a copy of their license. As of this publication, a month later, the Yoons have not responded.
An investigator obtained the names and addresses of four of their suppliers and none of them were USDA licensees, according to Stephanie Shane, director of the puppy mill campaign at HSUS.

I spoke to three customers who bought sick dogs from Posh Puppy owners John and Michelle Yoon. One of the dogs, a Maltese, died in October 2007, less than a month after he was brought home. “I was crying every day,” said the woman who bought him (she did not want me to reveal her name). My vet thinks he died of distemper. It was a horrible experience,” she cried. “At the end, she (Michelle Yoon) spoke with my vet. She paid $3000.” Brokenhearted, she bought two more “at a little bit of a discount.” A month later, one of them had gerardia and bloody diarrhea. “I never got papers on any of my dogs,” she said. “When my baby was sick, she (Michelle Yoon) was standoffish. She told me she would take the dog back and told me to ‘pull in the back,’ not to come into the front of the store,” she continued. Through the back door, out of sight.

Activist Kim Sill with a shelter dog who found a forever home at the rally.

Photo by Charlotte Duncan

On January 2, 2008, John and Michelle Yoon appeared at the Van Nuys Superior Court to defend themselves in a lawsuit against them for selling three sick dogs to plaintiff Jayme Rones. Ms. Rones, carrying a heavy load of veterinary records in the crowded hallway outside the courtroom was despondent. “He has a hole in his heart and can die at any time,” she cried. John Yoon chuckled. “If you’re so dissatisfied, why would you come back,” he said, referring to the two other dogs she bought from them. Then, Michelle Yoon began to shake and sob. “I’m a good Christian,” she yelled.

After hours of deliberation with court appointed mediator Peggy Rodgers, rather than facing a higher court, the Yoons settled and paid an undisclosed sum to Ms. Rones, which she seemed satisfied with. The Yoons were also able to obtain an agreement from Ms. Rones to not discuss the outcome of the case but by then, she had already been interviewed. Ms. Rones showed me her thick stack of vet bills and complained to me about her sick Yorkie that she had picked out on-line from Posh Puppy for $1900. “He had a hernia and pneumonia,” she sobbed. “I called Michelle Yoon and she said she would make it up to me by discounting two other dogs. They were $2500 each and I paid $4000 for two dogs. Michelle said to me, ‘you don’t even need to bring them to a vet because we’re sure they’re 100% healthy.’ She told me she had checked them out with her vets. Well, the Maltese had a grade 4-5 heart murmur, ear mites and gerardia. The other one had impacted teeth and needed surgery on her mouth and eye problems.”

Another Posh Puppy client, Ms. Simon, told me of her experience. She bought two three-month old Yorkies from the Tarzana store in June on 2007. “I told Michelle (Yoon) this was the biggest nightmare that has ever happened,” she said. “It started with ringworm. They had parasites. Scabies. Kennel cough. Bordatella. My kids got infected. The papers? Still nothing.”

Not only do the Yoons sell sick dogs, they are also worsening the pet overpopulation crisis by encouraging buyers to breed the dogs they sell. Jayme Rones, the Posh Puppy client who took the Yoons to court, recounted how she had bought two puppies for the purpose of breeding them. Michelle Yoon encouraged illegal, backyard breeding by telling Ms. Rones that she could “make $500 for each studding,” demonstrating Posh Puppy’s dismissive attitude about the very publicized ordinance passed in the City of Los Angeles to spay and neuter dogs by the age of four months.

Last Saturday, the owners of Posh Puppy decided to not bring puppies to the store at all. Michael Libow, a Beverly Hills realtor who dropped by the rally last week said, “Their rent has to be at least $10,000 a month. They can’t last long. I hope they close.” A red-haired elderly woman who lives in the neighborhood, passes by every week and lingers to chat with us each time. “This is great, what you’re doing—a fantastic job,” she says. “We need this store in Beverly Hills like we need a hole in the head. When are you going to close down that house of horrors in the Beverly Center?”

Though most Saturdays the rally is punctuated by thumbs up signs from passersby and loud honking from drivers who approve of the protest, not everyone is sympathetic to the cause. Last Saturday, a trendy twenty-something blond with a gold hobo bag and a bird feather barrette in her hair was looking in the window when I approached her. I had a stack of Companion Animal Protection Society brochures in one hand and in the other, I was gripping the leash of my rescued Cairn terrier, who was festively dressed for the rally in a pink ruffled dress. Would you like a brochure to know what goes on in the puppy business,” I asked. Most people, when they see a scruffy dog in a pink dress can’t help but crack a smile but this woman remained stone-faced. “Don’t you get it,” she snapped. “I don’t care. Get away from me.”

Later, two men dressed like they had just stumbled out of rave party marched into Posh Puppy as if they were on the red carpet, dodging the paparazzi. As we approached the duo with pamphlets that featured heartbreaking pictures of dogs in puppy mills, the taller of the two threw his arm straight out and showed us his palm. “Talk to the hand,” he said as he glided inside. “Puh-lease,” said his shorter, swarthy friend. “You people make me sick! You’re hypocrites. Some of you are wearing leather!” Later, on his way out, the short one waved his hand in my face in triumph. “Get a life,” he hissed. “I just bought three puppies! Ha! We’re picking them up tomorrow!”

The entire purchase took less time than it takes to buy a sandwich at Subway. All of us standing outside helplessly watching that puppy deal go down agreed: these two men could never have passed a home check with a rescue organization.

Most pet shops have no compunctions about selling live animals to whoever is willing to pay. The ability to care for the animal, having a stable home, time, patience and an understanding of an animal’s basic needs simply isn’t criteria for purchase. Pet stores and puppy brokers and dealers across the nation sell barely weaned puppies on line or by telephone with no more care or conscience than a vacuum cleaner dealer sells a spare part. The puppies are no more than product—inventory. The supply is inexhaustible and as the inventory gets sold for up to $4000 a unit, there is more “product” on order—the incoming product, often from one of the tens of thousands of USDA licensed breeding facilities in the Mid-West, is already on the assembly line. In this case, the assembly line is different than one churning out appliance parts. This assembly line’s product is already kicking in the tired and worn womb of a living “breeder dog,” who is alone and afraid in a cage, in a breeding facility.

Photo by Elle

Pet stores around the country profiting from the boom have begun offering “financing” and they even mail out coupons for $100 off eight-week old puppies. When a puppy hasn’t sold fast enough, they slash the price and put him on sale like a handbag from last season. By contrast, rescue organizations interview a potential pet guardian for hours and then follow up with a home check to make sure the pet will be safe and loved for the rest of its life. Rescue organizations will check in months later to find out how the pet is adjusting and to make sure (if it wasn’t done already) that the pet is spayed or neutered.

None of the unpleasant hurdles the protesters face on Wilshire Boulevard ever seem to affect Lisa Beal, campaign director of Last Chance for Animals, who was instrumental in making the puppy mill campaign a priority at LCA. Every week, she stands at the corner of Roxbury looking more like an ex-runway model than an animal rights activist, holding an enormous banner that reads, “Adopt! Don’t buy!” “Posh Puppy is typical of the puppy stores that are booming in Los Angeles,” she says. “Pet stores help the puppy mill business flourish. There’s no way that pet stores could exist without puppy mills supplying them because of the high demand, period. That’s the bottom line. These bougie pet stores, they feel like Starbucks or Home Depot. It’s a familiar corporate vision and it makes you feel OK to buy. It puts a happy face on animal cruelty.”

A puppy named Obama campaigns for a new address. Do the "Wright" thing!

2008-03-21T15:27:00.000-07:00

"Do the Wright thing" and adopt Obama the puppy, who has the audacity of hope! He's on a campaign for love. Can you help him win your heart? He needs a superdelegate like you to elect him into your home.

Abandoned at a Los Angeles shelter with a broken pelvis, he needs an operation to make him walk tall again. He's young, he's a good guy, gets along with everybody, he's gorgeous, he's charming and he deserves to win!

See the story on Fetchdog.com below:

http://www.fetchdog.com/blogs/nosetotheground/General/a_puppy_named_obama_campaigns

The Joy of Fostering

2008-03-19T22:10:00.000-07:00

My Mom has a new article out on Fetchdog.com about fostering. I don't know where she gets off writing about fostering. She's not very good at it. In fact, she flunked fostering. That's how I got my live-in Broke-bark mountain boyfriend, Lamby. He's my white hot pufta, my cotton candy man, my fluffynutty ball of love. When I'm on top of him I'm on a cloud. Cloud mine.

The Joy of Fostering click here to read fetchdog.com

Are you missing the company of a dog but are reluctant to take on the full responsibility? Maybe you live in a smallish apartment or are worried about the burden of unexpected veterinary bills. Or perhaps you recently lost your dog but aren’t ready for a full-time dog. Well, there is a way to enjoy doggie companionship and help a dog in need on a temporary basis; it’s called fostering. Fostering a dog is one of the most rewarding ways to get that sublime dog love without having the full responsibility of life-long guardianship.

The author with Jinky and Lamby, the foster boy who won’t ever leave

Here’s how it works:
You give: a temporary crash pad, some food, water, a little exercise and love.
You get: lots of tail wags, wet nose kisses, dog hugs and that emotionally satisfying feeling of having saved a life.

Sadly, every year, four million companion animals are killed in our nation’s shelter system. The lucky ones who survive are saved by a network of rescue organizations that bail dogs out of the pound. Until those dogs are placed in their forever homes, they need a safe and emotionally supportive place to recover from their ordeal of anguish, abandonment and sometimes, injuries. That haven, where a lonely dog can heal his broken heart and learn to trust humans again could be your home for as little as a couple of days. Sometimes it takes a few months for a harder to place dog like a pit bull mix or a senior dog.

Rescue organizations usually have a website and a location where they show the dogs and conduct interviews with potential guardians. A foster dog is usually picked up by volunteers every weekend for appointments and returned in the evening until a suitable home is secured. Rescue organizations could not function without foster homes— fosters are special people who are an integral part of the rescue system. It’s simple; if there were more reliable foster guardians, more dogs could be saved from the pound.

An advantage of fostering is that you can choose the kind of doggie experience that suits you best. A good rescue organization will tailor your foster experience to your (and the dog’s) particular needs. For example; if you are a high energy person who wants to jog or likes to take long walks, you can arrange to foster an active, athletic dog. If you are the type of person who likes to stay home in the evenings and watch TV, you can arrange to foster a senior dog or an injured dog who will be happy to sit with you by the fire. If you have more free time and love puppies, you can arrange for that too. There is a perfect dog for every foster mom or dad.

Yet another advantage of fostering is that if you are looking for your dog of a lifetime, this is a smart way to meet different dogs, helping them along into their new homes until that magic moment happens. One night, you’ll be lying next to each other in bed and your foster dog will look deep into your eyes and sigh sweetly. You’ll return his gaze and reach out to him. You’ll feel a surge in your heart. You’ll know. You’ll tell yourself, no one else is good enough for this dog. You’ll hold him close and you’ll tell him the magic words, “you’re mine forever. I love you.”

At that moment, you will join an exclusive club, the elite corps of failed foster parents. I’ll tell you a secret: failure never felt so good.

Carole Raphaelle Davis is the author of “The Diary of Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife.” Website: http://www.hollywoodjinky.com/

Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife reports Paris Hilton admits to having dog mill in her home

2008-02-08T19:23:00.000-08:00

Paris Hilton is breaking the law big time. She's about as useless as a tick. She went on the Ellen show today and admitted to having 17 dogs in her house! She's a WHORE-DER! And to top it off, she admits to them having puppies all the time. "They keep having babies," she says, laughing.

Doesn't she know about the spay/neuter law in Los Angeles? Maybe I need to go to some nightclubs and show her my empty ball-sack.

Click here to see her act as dumb as a ringworm.

I can't get over how some humans just don't get it. All my old cell mates are waiting at the pound, dying everyday, and Paris Hilton is laughing, making more dogs in her dog factory while she's out drinking and partying. A lot of those dogs are litter mates, which means they shouldn't be inbreeding. One of these days, Paris Hilton is going to come home drunk and find a new-born litter of three-headed retarded chihuahuas on her pillow.

My mom went ballistic when she saw the footage.

Mom (yelling to Dad): "This is outrageous! Animal Control should go over there and bust her! I know rescue people who are SCRAMBLING to find foster homes because they are maxed out in their own homes with 5 dogs. And here she is, this vapid and deeply stupid woman, the star of a sex tape, hoarding and neglecting 17 animals!"

I'd like my kitty, who has irritable bowel syndrome, to squirt out some loose and stinky poop drip in her favorite handbag.

L.A. City Council Passes Spay Neuter Ordinance

2008-02-01T17:27:00.000-08:00

Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife reports on Los Angeles City Council decision to pass the spay/neuter ordinance. (photos by Elle Wittelsbach)
Read the LA Times article by Carla Hall here. For canine point of view, read on...

Today was a good day for dogs. The LA City Council voted 9-1 to make people take off our balls and to get rid of whatever it is bitches have down there that makes them pregnant. That means that we can all have fun humping now without anybody saying "Stop that!" We're going to have wild safe-hump parties and safe-hump orgies all over L.A. to celebrate. We still get to have all the play balls we want, even neuticals (those fake implant balls).

It also means that L.A. bitches won't be wearing those stupid heat pants (hot pants for dogs). FYI, I didn't particularly want to get my balls taken off, but I'm an active guy and this gives me a lot more freedom at the dog park or in Runyon Canyon. I can now walk right up to any bitch, sniff her butt and say, "hey, let's get it on!" without freaking her parents that the outcome will have my crazy underbite.

This is my wife Finley, humping my boyfriend Lamby. Risk-free-safe humporama with no consequences! YAY!

Another reason I like this new rule is that big, scary dogs that normally would like to kick my ass might be a little calmer now. They won't be so aggressive and it sorta evens the playing field for us. AND my vet says I'll live longer. Many more years of happy and safe humping.

Here's Councilman Rosendahl, the only guy who voted NO! He made a really silly speech about how he likes his cats to "roam." Gee, I hope they don't get eaten by coyotes. And he called the spay/neuter ordinance "fascist." What a big load of cat poop. Hey, did somebody pee on his tie?
You know what's really creepy about Rosendahl? He wanted to pose with Bob Barker, my hero, BEFORE he voted no. What a phony.

Mom went to the City Council meeting today and came back all excited. She was acting like she had just inherited a million bones. She's really happy because it means that less dogs will end up at the pound. I was on death row and I can tell you it's no fun. I'm lucky to be alive. I have millions of old cell mates in the shelters and dumb humans keep breeding more and more puppies while we die for no reason.

Mom: (to Dad) : "You should have seen the breeders getting up to speak in front of the city council! The spay/neuter people were all glamorous and smart. It was like ivy league genius runway models versus donut-eating hicks. One idiot got up there and embarrassed herself by saying how they 'have to train immigrants to be responsible pet owners.' Can you believe that racist crap? Another woman actually had the NERVE to get up and say, 'My dogs are MY PROPERTY! I do what I want with 'em!' See, that's the problem. These greedy pet trade morons think of dogs, our best friends, as property."

My wife Finley is NOT property. She's a lady (who sometimes eats her own poop).

When Mom was going through the metal detector at City Hall, her bra set off an alarm.

Cop (to Mom): "Uh... m'am, you have some metal on you? You wanna come through here again please m'am?"

Mom: "I think it's my underwire bra."

In other news today, some people who REALLY hate animals set off another 2 bombs in Bagdhad's pet market. Why would anybody want to blow up a pet market? Everybody talks about how many humans died, but as usual, not a single reporter even mentions that a whole bunch of animlas were blown to bits. I send my most virulent farty wind in the direction of the animal-hating terrorists in Iraq.

New York Post praises Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife! "Wickedly funny"

2008-01-06T16:20:00.000-08:00

Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife has a "wickedly funny voice."

'NET FOR PETS
STARS ADD POWER TO ANIMAL-THEMED BLOGS

by Julia Szabo read article here: NEW YORK POST

Excerpt:

January 6, 2008 -- PETS have inspired books, movies, plays, TV shows and magazines - so it was only a matter of time before they hit the World Wide Web as Weblog subjects. A new pack of bloggers is paw-printing the Internet with pet postings that are entertaining, informative and sometimes celebrity-studded.

For a blog "written" by a dog with a wickedly funny voice, check out Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife. Jinky, a rescued mutt, lives with comedy writer Kevin Rooney and actress-author Carole Raphaelle Davis, so his take on the writers' strike is especially, um, biting.

js@pet-reporter.com

I'm sending Julia Szabo a giant wet nose kiss. You see those roses I bought up there? I'm going to eat them all and send her the rosiest farty wind all the way across the country to N.Y. A big rose cloud is coming her way.

I'd take them to her myself, but I might get picked up by animal control and that's happened to me before. It wasn't fun, believe me.

Lately, some humans are after me because of my big bitey mouth. I've been sounding off about puppy stores in Los Angeles and the owners of the pet stores don't like my kind--a lowly pound dog. They think I'm worthless but I think they stink more than a thousand pounds of decomposing fish heads.

So I got together with a whole gang of my old cell mates from the pound and we walked down to Posh Puppy in Beverly Hills (scroll down the blog to see the report).

All the people driving by were cheering for us while we all lifted our legs on the Posh Puppy store and left a ginormous 80-dog farty stink there on Wilshire Boulevard .

These stupid pet stores sell $3000 sick dogs while perfectly good dogs like me are sitting in the pound getting whacked. Anybody who buys a dog in a pet store should be drowned in cat pee after all the news about puppy mills. And anybody who will sell a dog to any moron who has the cash is just greedy.These people are even greedier than my wife Finley, who steals all my food.

Here's my greedy wife-bitch, Finley. She inhales her food and then barrels over to my bowl before I'm done and shoves me aside. You know what her measurements are? 24-22-22

I think it's creepy that pet store owners let you look at their dogs on line, order them and then you can just go and pay to pick them up-- like ordering fast food. They don't even do home checks like rescue orgs do, to see that it's all ok. They buy little tiny over-bred dogs wholesale from other humans who breed and sell lots of puppies and keep their parents in cages their whole life, with just enough room to turn around.

But the stinkiest thing of all is that pet store pups are almost all from factories. My buddies at the Humane Society of the United States wrote them to ask them to give them a total list of ALL the places where the puppies' moms and dads are. They want to know the truth.

I know what's going on. When I was in the shelter, there were lots of expensive dogs there. All of a sudden, these pure-bred dogs found themselves dumped and alone because people who spent piles of money on them didn't think they matched the couch anymore or because they chewed up some $500 shoes. The dogs' parents all came from really bad hillbilly places in Indiana, Missouri, Virginia and even California--places where they keep hundreds of dogs in cages all alone, with no love. Puppy Mill places. GRRRRRRR.

I send my most virulent farty wind their way, all the way to Missouri, capital of mean doggie prisons.Pffffffffffff...

May the dog auctioners and dog factory owners and on-line dog sellers choke on my atomic farty bomb. May they be bitten by 50, 000,000,000 fleas right on the ass.

Posh Puppy of Tarzana and Beverly Hills closes due to protest

2007-12-28T23:53:00.000-08:00

Posh Puppy Store Closes in Reaction to Protest in Beverly Hills! A Victory for dog lovers.

Watch video of the protest by clicking on link below:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyZdkCi-JzQ

Not even two weeks after HSUS unleashed the scandal that blackened the reputation of Pets of Bel Air, the Hollywood celebrity pet shop that caters to party tarts Britney Spears and Paris Hilton, yet another celebrity pet shop came under fire—Posh Puppy of Beverly Hills. On Saturday, December 22, the busiest puppy buying day of the year, a feisty group of animal welfare activists gathered in Beverly Hills for a yuletide rally to speak out against puppy mills and to promote adoption in front of the Posh Puppy store on Wilshire Boulevard.
“Stop! Don’t shop! It’s kinder to adopt,” they chanted in unison.

Posh Puppy, which has several branches in Los Angeles (Beverly Hills and Tarzana) and specializes in selling “teacup breeds” like Malteses and Yorkies for thousands of dollars, has raised the ire of local residents who are frustrated with puppy stores sprouting up on every corner. They came to voice their disapproval of the cruelty behind the growing trend of disposable accessory dogs and to educate the public that the majority of pet shops are supplied by puppy mills.

John and Michelle Yoon, breeders themselves and owners of the Posh Puppy stores decided to close for the day instead of facing down this group of lively and organized California activists. Hollywood writer and comedian Carol Liefer pumped up her sign and pointed out that, “they [the owners] did the worst thing they could have done from an Art of War perspective. They retreated like cowards. We won! They closed!”

Members of small rescue organizations and large animal welfare organizations like Last Chance for Animals, Best Friends Animal Society and the Humane Society of the United States handed out brochures, waved signs and hooted as supporters drove by, honking their horns. Wide smiles, banners and home-made signs were all on display under the blinding California sun. Four-legged demonstrators and two-legged picketers mingled, informing passers-by and drumming up the genuine support of last minute Christmas shoppers. But the message was not about buying this holiday season, but more about giving—as in giving an abandoned dog a loving home.

Though the picket regulations were clear about not blocking the entrance to the store, dog-loving Beverly Hills cops weren’t about to spoil our fun and looked the other way when actor/comedian Richard Belzer, of Law and Order: Special Victims Unit sat in the forbidden doorway with his adopted poodle Bébé. “I, like most human beings, love dogs and some are not aware of the grotesque and ill treatment in these breeding mills here,” said Richard Belzer. “They just think of dogs as money and we have to protect them.”

In order to make a point, protesters had been asked to bring their own rescued pocket dogs. Many of the dogs were wearing oversized price tags that were slashed down from “$2000 to Priceless!” Almost all the furry objectors were dressed in cheerful holiday attire, some with antlers, some with bells and Santa suits. Terri Austin, founder of The Amanda Foundation in Beverly Hills, was carrying a miniature dog in her purse—yet another pure-bred dog that had been dumped on death row. “If we came here every week, we could shut them down for good. Let me know as soon as you do another protest, I am so there,” she said.
The Christmas spirit had electrified the crowd. Carole Sax, a local rescuer exclaimed what fun she was having. “I’m having a ball,” she said, bouncing Gretchen, her rescued Chihuahua, (named after the late Gretchen Wyler of the Genesis Awards). “I’ve never felt more alive, doing what I’m supposed to be doing—taking a stand with all these nice people! This place is disgusting and we should shut them all down!” Moments later, Gretchen, the designer dog, took a dump in her designer pocketbook.

Like a California wildfire, news of the rally had spread all over the internet in the days leading to the event. Small local rescue organizations worked overtime sending the invite to everyone on their e-mail lists. Last Chance for Animals, the sponsor of the rally, had sent out an action alert to its California members and Best Friends Animal Society followed with an alert two days later. Then, adding to the momentum, the Humane Society of the United States acted quickly and sent out a call for California members to join in. The dog lover groups on Myspace.com were peppered with bulletins. We knew we were going to have a successful rally at that point.

Apparently panicked by the impending rally, the Yoons scrambled to move all the animals from the store and taped a sign on the inside of the glass double doors of Posh Puppy, claiming they had closed for the “safety of our puppies as well as our clients.” The absurdity of its wording wasn’t lost on protesters, who see themselves more as the protectors of the animals being sold there. (In fact, if the Yoons are willing to work with L.A. Animal Services, we could find loving homes for all of their puppies within days.)

With a sly grin, Bill Dyer, of In Defense of Animals, slipped a fistful of anti-puppy mill brochures through a crack in the door, creating a surreal still life juxtaposition of $200 sequined party dresses for dogs and sad pictures of dogs suffering in a breeding warehouse.
Reporter and writer Jane Velez Mitchell came with her two rescued Chihuahua mixes. All wound up and spinning like a top, Cabo, her little black four-legged protester was the loudest of all. As if on springs, he jumped up in front of the cameras and barked his disapproval of the pet trade for three hours straight. Jinky, a death row mutt from the San Pedro shelter and the author of rescue book “The Diary of Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife” expressed himself literally: he lifted his leg and peed on Posh Puppy’s wall.

A short woman of about eighty whose face was pulled tight as a drum approached me. She was wearing a mink jacket despite the balmy L.A. weather and dropped her shopping bags and asked if she could join the group. “I love zuh doggies,” she said in a Russian accent. “ How can zay treat zem ziss vay?” I shrugged, thinking, boy, she’s damn lucky it’s not Fur Free Friday. That was in November and she would have gotten a real tongue lashing from this group. But sometimes you have to pick your battles and the battle of the day belonged to puppy mill dogs. I handed her a sign that my husband had made in our kitchen that morning that said, “Don’t be a bitch! Adopt one!” I told her, “OK now, walk around but you might, um, want to turn your jacket inside out? That look isn’t working for me right now.”

The star of the rally was undoubtedly Baby, a puppy mill survivor belonging to animal welfare advocate Jana Kohl. Baby’s story is heart wrenching. She had been kept in a cage as a breeding dog for nine years and her leg had to be amputated because it had been broken so badly in her wire cage. Her vocal chords had been removed so that she could no longer bark and annoy anyone with her cries. Her story broke our hearts but reminded us why we were there. We were there for her and all the others like her who are still imprisoned.

After the rally and amongst the blitz of congratulatory e-mails and phone calls, reports came in from distraught buyers of puppies from Posh Puppy in Tarzana and Beverly Hills. One of them, Jayme Rones, claims her puppies were very sick. She will be facing the Yoons in court on January 2 in Van Nuys, California. The rest of the reports, and there are eight so far as of this publication, are from Posh Puppy and other puppy stores in Los Angeles. The allegations are being investigated.

For dog lovers, the important thing to note is that even if a puppy store is willing to prove it is not being supplied by mass breeders (why don’t they?), this is a shady business with very little oversight. With all the negative buzz about puppy mills, it would behoove all puppy stores to be forthcoming about encouraging buyers to visit where the puppies are bred. If a breeder or puppy store owner is willing to sell a dog on-line, via e-mail, his ethics are planted in the gutter.

On December 27th, John Yoon was asked by Jennifer Krause of Best Friends Animal Society why he sells dogs when there are so many homeless animals in need at the local shelter. "We live in a free democracy,” he replied. “And people have the right to choose. Some people may choose to buy an economic car, like a Hyundai, and it may run perfectly well, and suit them just fine, and others may choose to buy a top of the line, Mercedes Benz. It's just a matter of choice."
The manner in which Mr. Yoon justifies his dog selling business reveals the way he thinks of animals as commodities. He is comparing dogs to cars. Not only is the comparison harmful, he is making a rather ugly social statement about people as well. To Yoon, the Hyundai is the shelter dog and the Mercedes Benz is his top of the line $3000 tea cup Maltese. To Yoon, the person getting the “economic” dog at the shelter just can’t afford to choose the top of line product that he sells in his upscale store. Yoon’s got it all wrong. 20% of the dogs at the shelter are “top of the line.” I have rescued two myself: a pure-bred Bichon Frisé and a show quality Cairn Terrier.

Mr. Yoon exacerbates his damaging comparison on Posh Puppy’s MySpace page: ( http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=194306 )
The Posh Puppy web page flaunts cars—Bentleys, Aston Martins, Porsches and BMW’s as arduously as it does undersized, over-bred tea cup dogs. Mr. Yoon is correct about the fact that it’s a matter of choice. Adopting a Maltese from a rescue organization for a donation of $300 is a far more ethical choice than buying a $3000 Maltese from a pet store. Not only is it a more ethical choice, it’s a smarter economic choice. If Mr. Yoon could adopt a Bentley with 3000 miles on it, I bet he’d take it.

Puppy store owners who claim to be breeders themselves, in an effort to assure buyers of their sincere love for dogs (as Posh Puppy owners and employees allegedly tell their customers) doesn’t automatically put them on Santa’s nice list. In fact, it just makes us wonder how many dogs they are breeding. Anything more than three breeding bitches puts a breeder under the jurisdiction of the USDA and there are minimum standards of care. To read the minimum standard of care for live animals in a breeding facility is depressing to anyone who loves their dog (http://www.aphis.usda.gov/animal_welfare/awr.shtml).

The dogs only need food, water, room to stand, turn around and have ventilation and some artificial light. You never have to let them out of the cage. Oh, and you’re not allowed to let them freeze to death.

In all fairness though, if we are going to point fingers at puppy stores and their suppliers, we should reserve a special finger for the buyer. With all of the information available in the press about puppy mills supplying pet stores, there is no longer any excuse for people to buy dogs and cats from pet stores. These buyers are not doing their homework. They want a luxury item and they want it now, at any cost and without any regard to where the dog might come from. When someone is buying an inanimate $2000 item on EBay, you can read the questions that go back and forth between the buyer and the seller, who is asked to prove where that item is from. Incredibly, it seems like puppy buyers ask fewer questions than someone buying a used bowl on EBay.

Carole Raphaelle Davis is an actress, animal welfare advocate and author of “The Diary of Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife.”
If you have bought a sick puppy from a Los Angeles puppy store, please contact the following Web Site: http://www.hollywoodjinky.com/ and post your story here in the comment section.
Photos by Melissa Maroff

Posh Puppy in Beverly Hills Closes in reaction to Protest!

2007-12-24T10:14:00.000-08:00

This is a big victory for animal welfare advocates against Posh Puppy of Tarzana and Beverly Hills. We closed them on the busiest puppy buying day of the year. Adoption is the ethical choice when bringing a companion animal into your heart and home. Like shoes at the shoe store are from shoe factories, pets from the pet store are from pet factories, where dogs are living in anguish, pain and agony. Get the real Christmas spirit this season and save a life. Adopt, don't buy while shelter dogs die." ---Carole Raphaelle Davis , actress, animal welfare advocate and author of "The Diary of Jinky, Dog of a Hollywood Wife."

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IyZdkCi-JzQ

Click on the link above to watch the Posh Puppy protest rally!
(pics by Melissa Maroff)

Tracy and Casper.

Lamby, my Brokebark boyfriend and his 3 Mommies, my Mom, Leslie Galagher and Jen Krause.
Deborah Bass, founder of Rags to Riches Rescue.
Leslie Galagher of 2hands4paws, Rachel Riskind (stupid Kitty's second mom) and MomaLamb.
This is the trouble maker who started it all. She kept calling mom every day for weeks.

Troublemaker: "Carole, you HAVE to do something about this! You have to close this place down! I can't stand driving by this disgusting place everyday! DO something!"

Richard Belzer from Law and Order Special Victims Unit came with my friend Bebe. (an adopted French Poodle) He was really jazzed that the store owners were so wimpy they closed! If you look closely, you can see the fog on the windows because Bebe sent some farty wind under Posh Puppy's front door. We all kind of rubbed our anal glands all over the door too.

Mom got together a huge bunch of our friends and we all drove down to Beverly Hills and closed down a stupid store called Posh Puppy. Puppy stores are the dumbest places. They pretend to like dogs there but really, all they do is make money off of us. LOTS of money. They sell dogs for thousands of dollars when lots of great dogs like me, Finley and Lamby are still in cages at the pound waiting to be adopted or die. People who buy from pet stores have kitty litter for brains.

There's Lamby, my Brokebark boyfriend. In his Santa suit, we call him LambaClaus!

I sent my most virulent farty wind right under the front door of Posh Puppy yesterday.

Look at Posh Puppy's stupid sign, like we were going to hurt anybody. If they were so worried about dog safety, maybe they would grow a heart and put pound dogs in the window instead. We're just as cute! And as for the "safety of their clients", what a load of cat poop that is.

Here's our friend Carol Liefer, the famous comedy writer. She' s adopted lots of pound dogs and she's the one who bought Mike Vick's phony sorry speech on the courthouse steps from HSUS.

There are two whores in my house.

2007-12-12T19:30:00.000-08:00

Dad's got a theme running this week that's driving Mom crazy. He puts the word 'whore' in every conversation. It started early today: Mom went on a meeting with some producers this morning before our midday foodies and came home with a long face.

Mom: "What a waste of time. Before I even went in, the assistant told me they wouldn't be shaking my hand--germs. Actress germs. I'm done. I'm moving on."

Dad: "Move ON dot whore!"

Mom: "www.moveon.whore? Thanks a lot. That makes me feel so much better."

Dad: "What a whoreable life you lead. Welcome home. You put the HO in HOME."

Dad isn't being very understanding. He's always making word jokes. Can't help it. Later, Mom was holding her head and moaning like Stupid Kitty does when we run out of wet food.

Mom: "Ow! Aaaaaaaw! My head hurts."

Dad: "Maybe it's your WHOREmones."

Mom: "(to Dad) Can you go downstairs and get me an aspirin?"

After about two hours, Dad came back with a huge pill the size of a kitty nugget and a glass of water.

Dad: "Some ASS-pirin?"

Mom: "This is aspirin? Are you trying to poison me?"

Dad: "I could never get away with it. They'd do a whore-topsy."

Mom laughed, even though I could tell she didn't want to think it was funny. She's pretty sensitive lately about being called a whore. Even Lamby has been calling her a whore for several days now non-stop. He sits in front of her, stares her down and in a really low voice, calls her names.

Lamby: "Whoarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre. Whoarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre."

I told him it's not a good idea to make Mom mad, since she adopted him and all. But that doesn't stop him. He knows he's a pure-bred white, fluffy rock star and that Dad would rather spoon him all night than her.

Mom: "I know he's just talking to get a bone or something but it really does sound like he's calling me a whore, doesn't it? Listen to him!"

Lamby: "rrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr whoarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrre!"

Dad: "Smart doggie."

There are only two whores in this house. I'll tell you who's a whore around here.

Finley.

And Stupid Kitty.

Obvious whores.

2007-12-11T19:37:00.000-08:00

Carole Raphaelle Davis and Last Chance for Animals invite you to:

A Pro-Adoption, anti-puppy mill, anti-puppy store Christmas Protest!

Join us in a Yuletide fun- walk, telling people nicely to,

“Please Don’t BUY! While shelter dogs DIE!”

Saturday, December 22nd , 12 -3 PM

In front of Posh Puppy (across from Neiman Marcus)

9699 Wilshire Boulevard, Beverly Hills, 90212

Morons Eating Monkeys in Staten Island should be drowned in cat pee.

2007-11-25T14:03:00.000-08:00

I can't believe that idiots in Staten Island are eating monkeys because "it's part of their religious upbringing." A moron from Liberia, Mamie Manneh, has had her house searched, where they found "a tiny arm of a monkey" and boxes full of dismembered monkeys.

These people, who have come to live in my country from Africa, think it's ok to have monkey arms sent to them in a box so they can celebrate weddings by cooking them up. What about the wedding that monkey was going to celebrate? Maybe he was getting married.

Read this to see who is the lastest on my most wanted to throw cat poop at list: http://www.cnn.com/2007/US/law/11/25/monkey.meat.ap/index.html

What is wrong with them? Don't they know that my nickname is Monkey? Don't they know that we are all monkeys and that monkeys are smart and that they can think, feel, count, use tools, and pick really well-performing stocks? Don't they read about science that proves that people and monkeys share DNA and that we are all related? Really, that's like if I said my religion made me eat people arms. What kind of religion is that? And why would anybody want to go and kidnap a monkey from his family and then chop him up to send him to these idiots so he can end up in a stew?

I hope a whole gang of monkeys from Liberia and Guinea gets on a plane and flies over here to MY country (they can stay at my house) and then goes and kicks in the door of this Mamie Manneh person to give them a piece of their minds.

Monkeys have minds.

Look at me and my mom. We are both obviously descended from Monkeys.

Liberian Monkey: (holding this Mamie Manneh woman upsidedown) "Hey, hey, HEY! How do you like me now? How 'bout I put you in a soup? Why you have to disrespect me like that? Why I oughtta...I oughtta smear you with cat poop!"

I'm pretty sure my mom was raised by monkeys. She spent many years in a tree in Thailand and she tells me she learned a lot from monkeys, like finding tiny fleas in my backhair and smiling.

WGA and Dog Writers of America on STRIKE! Hey Producers! Eat MY Residuals!

2007-11-21T16:46:00.000-08:00

The WGA Riots were kind of like Tiananmen Square except we didn't get killed. But then again, I wouldn't even have to riot in China to get clubbed to death by the police. Over there, a dog could just be taking a walk and end up in a soup pot.

That's what's great about America. We can bark as loud as we want. I think it's in the constitution or something like that. You know, liberty and the pursuit of barkiness. The freedom of the Bark Act.

And the right to bear lethal farts.

The Dog Writers of America are on strike and we are supporting the WGA against those fat, greedy producers. They want to give us the equivalent of a teeny, tiny chicken toe nail bone for what we write. And for what we write that shows up on the Internet, they want to give us zero, zilcho, nada bones, not even the tiniest shard of flea bone that was digested a thousand times by an old cat.

I'd like to bite them all in the butt.

Here's what I have to say to the producers, who, by the way, produce a LOT of cat poop:

Hey Producers! Eat MY residuals!

And for those of you who believe that the writers write shows that belong in the litter box, it's the PRODUCERS who dumb it all down! They're the ones ordering the cat poop to begin with! We'd LIKE to write better shows, but guess what? As one WGA writer, Chris Kelly said at the Riot yesterday, "We'd like to, but they won't let us!"

So Mom and Dad dressed us in our 'Hey Producers! Eat my Residuals!' T shirts and off we went to riot on Hollywood Boulevard. We almost got trampled, the riot got so crazy.

As usual, Mom and Dad were fighting the whole time because we parked like a thousand miles away from the march and basically, he wasn't obeying her like she wants him to.

Mom: "Why did you lose sight of David?! That's our ride home! We're going to get stuck here without a way home. Why couldn't we come in our own car?"

Dad just got that look on his face where his chin juts out but he looked like everybody else there who was mad so he fit right in. I don't know who Dad was more mad at, Mom or the producers who are ripping him off.