tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-61343512008-10-09T05:10:28.662+01:00Yup. My neighbours are Ladies of Negotiable Affection... and it's TOO INTERESTING not to share.Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comBlogger208125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-39192721133572642072008-09-30T18:18:00.000+01:002008-10-02T18:18:35.449+01:00

So one of the best things about my new place (except the absence of women selling themselves for sex in my basement) is the fact I have my own back garden. I can not tell you, ladies and gentlemen, exactly how thrilled I am to hang out my own pants on my own washing line (Ok. It's nae a washing line. It's a whirly. Do I need to do a translation of whirly for the non-Scots reading this? or is a

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-43735446299233745432008-07-27T20:57:00.003+01:002008-07-27T21:01:48.230+01:00

After attending the Cullerlie Traditional Singing Weekend the past three days (My Neighbours Were Folkie Folks In Tents), I promised some to make the link to the Hoors Song easier to find. So here it is: http://myneighboursarehoors.blogspot.com/2008/01/i-wrote-song.html

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-53898979908059551212008-07-13T22:11:00.003+01:002008-07-27T20:54:41.216+01:00

So yes. I have been Absent. Not just mentally (that is nothing new) , but from t'internet as a whole. For an awfy long time. And why? I hear you ask impatiently? Well, I couldn't really say anything about it at the time without giving away my oh-so-secret identity, but... After 10 years in my flat, I started getting itchy feet. Looking at the housing market, I decided that if there was any

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-15017513558634717902008-04-30T21:32:00.003+01:002008-04-30T21:45:13.792+01:00

There are many fine things in having a friend live just a few doors up from you. One is borrowing cups of sugar (much easier to go a few doors up than to borrow possibly-contaminated sugar from your hooring neighbours). Another is meeting in the local for a bottle of cheap pink wine and some chicken in a basket. Another is when you receive a text like the one I just got 10 minutes ago: "Quick

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-347441523466859382008-04-03T18:35:00.000+01:002008-04-03T18:08:00.045+01:00

... Especially for these people who don't realise that light's on and curtains open mean that EVERYONE can see in on dark nights (och but I'm glad those nights are fair drawin' oot now here in the Grey Toon - aye. I saw my first bee of the spring today!) Hence I would like to publicly congratulate my neighbours across the way on the fine performance they're putting on - as I'm sure I speak for

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-26993633814494485762008-02-22T23:21:00.000Z2008-02-22T23:21:42.578Z

So we went to see Sweeny Todd a couple of weeks ago. I won't fill this post with my amazing guru-like film like criticisms, but will tell you what happened after. * We enjoyed the movie (for you 'Mercans. "Pictures" for the rest of us), had the usual hassle getting out of the Cineworld car-park and then drove towards our destination, Our Local Chinese Restaurant, through the Red Light District

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-58865873876008705492008-01-23T22:29:00.000Z2008-01-23T22:29:15.756Z

In the style of Father Lionel Fanthorpe... I wrote a song. And here it is, it's called "The My Neighbours Are Hoors Song" It's to be sung to the tune of Nicky Tams - because apparently everyone's first song has to be written to the tune of Nicky Tams. (OK. It's not my first song. That was "Prozac at Christmas," and that was co-written to the tune of "Happy Christmas (War is Over)") It's also

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-80511240855372006172008-01-03T18:54:00.000Z2008-01-04T21:18:43.599Z

Christmas. Ah Christmas. The Festive Season. Yule. The Season of Overindulgence, and in my case... The Ceremonial Eating of Cheese. Sorry Girlies. I could give up Chocolate. I could never sully my tastebuds with Cadbury's ever again. I could skip past the Bournville Factory, twirl past the cocoa fields of this earth and, verily sprint, past the combined chocolatiers of Belgium,

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-68273535660064549812007-12-29T12:17:00.000Z2007-12-29T12:35:16.318Z

Just back from Christmas Gallivanting - so a belated Merry Christmas to you all! :)

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-81335542151679885432007-11-12T18:49:00.000Z2007-11-12T18:56:52.859Z

I've been try to keep my cool over this. The Nice Council Man With The Drainrods was asking me the other week if I'd seen a particular tramp going around the area lately. Yes. I had. "He's nae lookin' well." "He's aye drinkin Cider" "Far does he bide?" The conversation went on. Poor Council Man couldn't sleep one night because of the singing beneath his window! I sympathised and thought

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-82623698606897875622007-10-09T18:30:00.000+01:002007-10-09T20:26:28.104+01:00

I really am in two minds whether or not to publish this post. I'm don't mean to get on my high horse and think I'm better than anyone and I'm not being naive or anything cuz I do know what goes on (dontchaknow) but there's something about this story that makes me go "Ewwwwwwwwwww" or shudder or, in fact, go "Heeuuurgh!" (Which isn't a very lady-like noise). Onwaye. A friend of mine was

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-47352164528833156982007-09-20T18:51:00.000+01:002007-09-20T19:00:35.645+01:00

So there's a Chinese medicine shop at Holburn Junction... I was sitting in traffic the other evening, preparing to run the gauntlet of drunken neds running across Union Street, and I chanced to look a a nice new shiny advert in their window which proclaimed - "Only £25! Foot and Boby Massage!" And I wondered... Had it been an accidental mis-spelling of Body? Or even more tragically, had

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-63992177067834750492007-09-01T19:31:00.000+01:002007-09-01T21:41:22.786+01:00

Yeah, I know - I've been awfy quiet of late! Of course with the Hoors gone, there's not that much to write about! (Well there is, but I can't. This will all make sense some time in the future.) Well... tonights post. It is written as I sit here in the freezing chill of a Grey Toon summers evening, huddled round my Bombay Bad Boy (TM). And tonight my thoughts drift towards the poor hard

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-1159217621119109012007-07-16T21:29:00.000+01:002007-07-16T21:29:14.153+01:00

People have been coming and going from Shetland Girl's flat that is up for sale, you can hear them go up the stairs. The Boy and I were busy wrestling some heavy DIY detritus down the stairs and The Dad of a Potential Purchaser was just in time to open the door for us. (What a nice man). He smiled and asked a few questions - like you should when you're buying a flat. Such as: 1) Do the buzzers

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-1159215528508333942007-07-01T22:03:00.000+01:002007-07-01T22:03:42.891+01:00

It's been a good long time since Shetland Girl's little brother's mates (aka Busted) got a bollocking from Shetland Girl for peuking all over the stairs outside our flat(see this post) a (Also this post and this post leading up to this event). And I have to say things have been very quiet indeed upstairs - obviously Busted had been banned by Shetland Girl from renting out/squatting in/

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-3491104736478577532007-06-17T14:45:00.000+01:002007-06-17T14:47:25.203+01:00

No posts for a couple of weeks as I'm off to swim in the mud at Glastonbury!

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-81546384247070807112007-06-11T19:52:00.000+01:002007-06-17T14:49:46.865+01:00

I should have posted about this a while ago but never got around to it... I was talking a few weeks back to the young lady who has moved into the flat previously occupied by The Hoors. After a few minutes of chatting she asked who lived in the flat before her. "Aaaah, ummm, aaah, errrr...." I fumbled looking for a way to break this to her gently. "Och, don't worry about that! I know what

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-61494799248162752452007-06-03T09:52:00.000+01:002007-06-03T09:52:19.244+01:00

Ladies and Gentlemen. Sitemeter is a very useful (and free) tool. Never let it be said that I don't give any blogging tools free publicity. You can see where people accessing your site live. You can see when they access the site from their workplace (and hence I'd like to say a big "HI!" to all the uk government workers out there :) And more to the point, you can see what they were searching

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-63122632275786644502007-05-24T21:00:00.000+01:002007-05-26T20:31:48.453+01:00

So me and my mate were out the other night being Ladies Wot Dine at one of the Grey Toon's favourite establishments, Le Ristorante Poshe. Awaiting our fine cuisine, we were few glasses into a bottle of fine pink wine and starting to put the world to rights. Neds? What's to be done with them! The Grey Toon Bypass? A shocking state of affairs! The Grey Toon Housing Market? What's the world

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-1169494037647302342007-05-14T21:37:00.000+01:002007-05-14T21:37:49.849+01:00

As promised in my last post, here is a newspaper report from the time of the couple caught "in flagrante" in a Grey Toon park by a thievin ned. Good on them for having the nerve to report the thefts... That's all I can say! A couple who were having sex in an Aberdeen city park, had to walk home stark naked, after their clothes were stolen. The “gentleman” involved in the open-air event, is said

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-1168891101161566082007-05-07T09:30:00.000+01:002007-05-07T10:19:54.902+01:00

A friend's dad brought up the subject a couple of weekends ago "Remember that time there was a naked man in your back garden?" Initially there was a bit of confusion over which of three incidents he was referring to. Was he talking about... 1) When there was a naked man knocking on my door in a hotel a couple of years back. (No. I hadn't ordered one.) 2) The actual incident he was referring

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-58200069673816923462007-04-30T20:35:00.000+01:002007-04-30T20:35:48.783+01:00

Which Grey Toonser or ex pat of the Grey Toon can claim they have no knowledge of The 24 Hour Porn And Popper Shop? Yes. I can hear you all sigh in reminiscence of the time you stumbled up there at 4am to purchase a nice apple pie, a bottle of fizzy wine for 99p and a few bags of those bizarre Norwegian cracker things that have been reduced to 25p because they're 3 months past their sell by

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-48300077050234519782007-04-23T19:29:00.000+01:002007-04-23T19:29:34.962+01:00

It is my great pleasure, to bamf you over to a fellow Grey Toonser's blog where he has achieved something I never had the guts to do. Yes folks, Darren was able to lean out his window and take photos of the hoors arranging business there! (Outside a very recogniseable blue and yellow door.) Linky: http://moblog.co.uk/view.php?id=242474 On behalf of all the hoors neighbours of the world, Darren

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-21144174533871198732007-04-17T20:19:00.000+01:002007-04-22T10:28:15.538+01:00

I can't remember if I ever wrote about this, but we were talking about it in the pub the other night. Once, long ago in the late 90's, we (the residents of the tenement) found out that Our Neighbours Were Hoors. Our first reactions on discovering this? Well, they included gossiping between neighbours behind closed doors over cups of tea (and in the case of the dead man, a Tennents Stubby),

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-6134351.post-74659020255135916952007-04-07T01:59:00.000+01:002007-04-07T01:59:13.351+01:00

So yeah. In my last post I told you about the usual game on the way back from the cinema when you drive home through the tolerance zone. (Hoor spotting). Well, we had just taken my friend's son to see some kids film or other and we were taking that route so we could get chips on the way home. Despite the heavy rain, there were quite a lot of street hoors out, pacing up and down in their thigh

Neighbour of Teh Hoors!http://www.blogger.com/profile/13792218353651019275noreply@blogger.com