Magpie Ima

Slow News Day?

2008-07-22T00:40:00.000-07:00

This is news?

Proof of my Insanity

2008-07-21T16:50:00.000-07:00

As promised, a kvetch free post. No griping about kids. Instead I bring you My Summer Project, aka Proof of My Insanity.

I am making this skirt, as shown in The Alabama Stitch Book which is full of gorgeous projects that probably shouldn't be attempted by a mother of 3 kids. But I couldn't resist. I dipped my toes in the water last month when making MonkeyBoy his one-of-a-kind bar mitzvah T-shirt. That was a quick but very enjoyable project using a pre-existing garment.

This skirt, on the other hand, is being made from scratch. I dyed the fabric myself, screwed up royally when cutting the pattern pieces, and then dyed a whole new batch of fabric which came out the wrong color. After the third and final dye session I ended up a with about 2 1/2 yards each of a deep red and a sunny gold. This time everything was cut properly.

The next step: stenciling the fabric. For this I dragged The Spouse in to cut a stencil from acetate. I mixed fabric paints to make a dark purple and proceeded to stencil the first of five panels.

Once the fabric paint was heat-set I layered red over gold and began stitching which is what I will be doing for quite some time.

Once the stitching is completed I get to do the really fun part: cutting the top layer away to reveal the sunny gold underneath. I am painfully aware that one mistake and I could cut through the bottom layer, ruining everything. I am being very careful.

Eventually, maybe in November at the rate I'm going, I'll have all 5 panels completed and stitched together, bound at the top with fold over elastic to make what I hope is a truly gorgeous garment.

Either that or I'll be firmly ensconced in the crafty loony bin.

More Drama

2008-07-17T18:42:00.000-07:00

Well you all seemed to like yesterday's post pretty well. Five comments! I didn't even know I had five readers. Thanks for the feedback.

The Dark Lord made it home in one piece and had such a great time that I suggested maybe he invite the crew over next week to celebrate his birthday. He seemed pretty pleased with that idea so I guess I did something right.

Now on to the next drama. I was very, very bad today. MonkeyBoy pushed me to my absolute limit and my behavior was ... not good. There were various causes: bar mitzvah thank yous, housework, and tae kwon do class but at his age these don't seem to be too onerous especially since he's been spending half of every day up at the high school attending an animation camp, having a blast, and making friends.

When he was working towards his bar mitzvah, I was really impressed with his sudden maturity and work ethic. I thought I was seeing a whole new kid. But now that it's over he's sliding back into his old habits. I can't get him to lift a finger around the house and he still hasn't made much of a dent in his thank yous which, as far as I'm concerned, are in no way optional.

Additionally, last I heard he was going to bail on tae kwon do. This summer his regular teacher was transferred to another site and now he's working with someone new. He doesn't like her but the only reasons I'm getting are that she asked him to re-tie his belt and told him to wash his feet. This boy wears his Crocs all summer --have you seen boy feet recently extracted from Crocs? Yuck. I'm not sure how she went about making the request but I have no doubt it was justified given that they work out barefoot. Interestingly, The Dark Lord is also in this class as a beginner and he thinks the teacher is just swell. I can't figure out what's going on here and why, after a year of work, MonkeyBoy is ready to bail.

I keep trying to talk to him about sticking it out and trying to learn what there is to be learned but it's not even up for discussion at the moment. I can't seem to reach him right now and get him to take responsibility for much of anything and it's wildly frustrating.

On a more positive note--I took all that negative energy from this morning's interactions with MonkeyBoy and channeled it into The Most Dreaded Task of All. I cleaned The Princess' room. No small thing given that she is a champion hoarder. It's far from spotless but you can walk across the room now. She decided at some point to tie endless yard of novelty yarn to almost everything in the room making a sort of sparkly but chaotic giant spider's web. That was some work to untangle but once the stray yarn was removed it wasn't too hard to get in and clean. I hate housework more than most people but I have to admit that was very satisfying.

Next up: a post that doesn't include kvetching about my kids and doubting my parenting skills. I promise pretty pictures of my current work-in-progress which is turning out to be quite lovely.

Another Parenting Test

2008-07-16T16:25:00.000-07:00

So I have this teenager. Two, actually, but right now it's the oldest (who will be 15 next week) who is on my mind. Homeschooled until his freshman year of high school, The Dark Lord has always been quiet, independent, and not exactly a social butterfly. However his desire to attend public school grew from his need to broaden his social circle and while I had my doubts about how that might evolve at school, I let him go.

The first semester was hard but when the young adult son of The Dark Lord's animation teacher offered to start up and after school manga drawing club, my boy found his people. They had such a good time hanging out together that they decided to keep meeting weekly at the school over the summer. And then I was told that "a bunch of kids were going to go hang out at Alex's house" today. Alex, it turns out is an 18 year old recent graduate who, for reasons unclear to me, lives nowhere near us. "Don't worry Mom. Alex will drive us to his house".

Now I don't know about you but there are few things that fill me with greater terror than a car full of teen boys being driven by yet another teen. I can count at least 5 teens I know of that died needlessly in car accidents. All my crazy fears about these kids hanging out, taking drugs, and having sex all afternoon were completely obliterated by my fear of letting my child in a car with a teen driver.

The Dark Lord, needless to say, felt I was being overprotective and controlling. "Why don't you trust me?" was what I kept hearing from him. What I couldn't seem to get across to him was that it wasn't about trusting him, it was about the other kids, only one of whom I'd met. He begged me to speak with Alex who was supposed to convince me that it was all OK. He told me, quite honestly, that his mom wouldn't be home until a couple of hours after they were getting together but his sisters would be there. He assured me there would be nothing but video games and drawing. And, for better or worse, I believed him.

So we reached a compromise. I drove him over there and met the kids, who seemed like a goofy but completely harmless bunch. No slurred speech or red eyes. Only polite introductions. I invited them to come hang out at our house next week and even provided cookies and soda to further encourage them. And then I left.

Since The Princess is playing at a friend's house and Monkey Boy is at animation camp, I have couple of hours free before work to process this. It feels big, like my boy is taking an important step out into the wider world. And I'm getting challenged once again to find that balance between encouraging independence and keeping him safe.

Kosher

2008-07-15T17:37:00.000-07:00

My goodness, it's been a while since I've written. I'm very much in the summer groove. Not much has really seemed all that bloggable. But today I came across something I wanted to share.

Many of you know that immigration issues are very dear to my heart. I've been following the stories about the recent ICE raid in Postville, Iowa at the country's largest kosher meat processor. I used to buy exclusively kosher meat because making that extra effort and paying that extra price reminded me that I'm Jewish and that eating meat was nothing to take lightly.

I've stopped buying kosher meat due to the horrific stories I'd been hearing about the Rubaskin operation which supplies what little kosher meat is available in Portland. According to Rabbi Amy Eilberg's recent sermon addressing the Rubashkin raid, workers consistently tell stories of abuse and fraud, sexual intimidation, unsafe working conditions, and more.

What I can't understand is how my fellow Jews can continue buying Rubashkin meat. I stopped buying it well before the recent raid when I realized I didn't want to support large scale factory farming and the wasteful shipping of meat across the continent. My meat purchases are rare anyway so I doubt anyone noticed. But the kosher meat industry is large and growing. Surely we can demand higher standards from our food. Kosher food is identified by a hechsher, a symbol that some authority has deemed it fit for Jews to eat. I'd like to see that certification be considerably more stringent and include the wellbeing of both workers and animals. Apparently I'm not alone as there are now folks working on establishing a hechsher tzedek to be given to foods that are produced without worker exploitation.

I fully support the hechsher tzedek and look forward to seeing it on my food. There's kosher and then there's kosher.

Progress

2008-07-03T18:33:00.000-07:00

Back in February I wrote about my troubles finding the right piano teacher for The Princess. Because she is so clearly attuned to music, finding a good fit was really important to me. But I also struggled with the dilemma whether we should tough it out and wait for things to get better or try yet another teacher.

A number of parents whose opinions I value highly raved about one teacher but there was a drawback. Normally she takes kids 8 and up. After weeks of watching my daughter avoid the piano and refuse to practice, I called The Wonder Teacher up just to talk about what we were experiencing. She suggested that I enroll The Princess for a short course of lessons on a trial basis. She started last week and is so much happier. Unlike her previous situation, she isn't sitting at the piano trying to puzzle out notes for the entire lesson. There's no note reading at all so far, which I think is fine. What I do see is a variety of activities including singing, dancing, composition, and ear training. The combination seems to be working as I'm hearing more experimentation at the piano, more singing, and more questions about how music works.

In fairness, I should say that the folks at the prior music school listened when I voiced concerns and they did try to work with us. But their approach is very focused on sight reading and that was stressing my little one out. I am glad we stuck with them long enough to know it wasn't going to work for now. And I'm glad I listened to my heart and kept looking for the right teacher. I don't care if The Princess grows up to be a concert pianist. All I want is for her natural love of music to grow. I think she's finally in the right place for that and I couldn't be happier.

Supid, Stupid, STUPID

2008-07-01T23:42:00.000-07:00

You know how it feels when you start something big? There are lots of details and loose ends that seem as though they'll never come together. You keep at it and suddenly you realize that your big complicated task might not be so big after all, and things start falling into place. You start to get into the groove, things are humming along, you have visions of your project completed quickly and beautifully and then WHAM! it hits you. You've totally screwed things up and it's back to square one.

Or maybe that only happens to me.

I've been waiting for so long to start a project from the Alabama Stitch Book. While I was busy pulling a bar mitzvah together I enviously watched other crafty types dive in and make gorgeous projects. For me, it's been all about the skirt, a stunning double layered reverse applique garment stitched entirely by hand. I wanted to make it so badly that my fingers twitched in anticipation.

Any normal person would have gone out and bought the fabric and gotten started already, but I couldn't find anything affordable that I liked. My problem was solved when one friend gave me yards of cotton jersey and another friend gave me a bunch of dye so I could just make what I wanted.

And I did. Dyeing was a kick. I had yards of sunny gold and deep almost-cranberry red finally ready to go yesterday. The Spouse was roped into cutting a stencil for me since I'm a klutz and have no business using an x-acto knife. I was ready to start transferring a design on to my skirt panels tonight when I realized that I had cut the panels with the fabric running in the wrong direction.

Since there is a grain line on the pattern and the instructions mention cutting the fabric on the grain I figure this is a pretty important step. Of course I didn't realize my mistake until I'd cut up most of the fabric. The wrong way. I was tempted to just use push on through and hope for the best but, for once, I actually thoguht it through. Because I really didn't want to spend weeks stenciling and stitching this skirt and seaming its five panels together by hand only to have it pucker, stretch, and hang on me like wet newspaper. I really do want to do it right.

So now I have to order more dye and re-dye my fabric. Luckily I have plenty left. But I have to wait. Again. Which I really hate.

In the meantime, a quick fix. I had a plain white jersey dress for The Princess which I threw in the dye pot. It came out a lovely sunny yellow but struck me as just a bit plain. So I gussied it up with a bit of embroidery using the Chinese lantern design from Sublime Stitching. Not the best photo what with all the cream cheese, but the embroidery both perked up the dress and filled a need.

Anyone out there with patience to spare, can you send some my way until I grow up?

Heat

2008-06-26T13:02:00.001-07:00

On the meteorological front, they say it's coming. On the feline fertility front....it's here.

I don't think I ever mentioned the tiny gray cat that showed up here days before the bar mitzvah. Every female cat I've ever owned has been promptly spayed so believe it or not, I've never been around a pregnant cat. This girl showed up with swollen teats but not a kitten in sight. Given her insistence on getting in the house and settling down, I figured she'd be having kittens soon. I ran a bunch of ads and called all the shelters but, guess what? She wasn't the only preggo kitty in town. I couldn't throw her out, could I? I think there's a sign over my door that says "sucker" in cat language.

After a few days, she was still swollen up, but maybe less so. It was hard to tell, until one friend felt her up and decided she'd had the kittens and was just engorged. I can't help but wonder what must have happened to her kittens and how she ended up in our neighborhood. Meanwhile, the cat had definitely moved in and joined the family without upsetting the other cats too terribly much. We tossed more than few names around and have finally settled on Chutki (the little sister in more than one Bollywood movie). I called the vet but had to wait until tomorrow for her checkup. All is good, right?

Except that yesterday morning I noticed she was out in the back yard entertaining every male cat in the neighborhood (except our own, who has clearly had it with all the females in the house and only drops by to eat these days). I immediately scared the boys off, brought Chutki in and made it clear to the kids that she was to stay inside. She made quite the ruckus last night, moaning and carrying on, trying to get out through the basment windows and knocking things over in the process. Somehow she was successful as we found her outside this morning with a crowd of noisy boys around again. So it's probably too late and I fear we're going to end up with kittens after all. Because, you know, four cats isn't enough.

Why I Love My Job

2008-06-24T19:27:00.000-07:00

There are lots of reasons, many of which I've written about here. Tonight provided yet another.

A young man just enrolled in my class. He is very polite, very tall, and very Chinese. With my many Latino and Russian students, it's always clear to me which are first and last names, but with Chinese and Vietnamese students it's harder to tell. When I asked this fellow which name I should address him by in class he said, "Call me Paco".

I love that.

18 Years

2008-06-24T09:51:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was our anniversary and in all the hustle and bustle of friends leaving and the first day of the term I nearly forgot about it altogether. Nothing special happened, I didn't even manage a gift or a cake or a bar of chocolate for my husband. Yes, I am feeling like a worm.

We've seen quite a few marriages go on the rocks in the last few years so I guess there's something to be said for ours which feels solid enough after 18 years that an anniversary is just another day.

Everything I wrote last year still holds true, and then some. Here's to the next 18 years!

I'm Back

2008-06-23T13:56:00.000-07:00

It's been a busy few weeks around here and my one week break just flew by in a flurry of outings, sunburn, good meals, friends, and the occasional margarita.

We took trips to Sauvie Island, Neskowin, and Ridgefield National Wildlife Refuge. We've had lovely meals at Chennai Masala, Pho Van, and yes, even at home on a perfect Midsummer's Eve.

It was a good week for thrift stores and vintage finds including old rickrack, beautiful buttery soft cotton sheets, a charming Japanese embroidery magazine from 1974, lovely old printed cotton handkerchiefs, and a whole jar filled with chandelier crystals. Not sure what I'm going to do with those but how could I pass them up? I was sad to hear that this would be the last year for the St Rita's Catholic Church Rummage Sale, source of most of these extremely inexpensive finds.

Oh--we met these guys at our farmers market and they were a hoot. Lovely produce, too. Monkey Boy may be volunteering with them this summer.

Here are few favorite photos from the last few days:

Now that the Big Event has passed and the friends have gone home it's back to reality: work, laundry, meals, and summer schedules--all of which are surprisingly more appealing to me than I could have imagined. Oh, and maybe a bit more regular blogging......

Mosaic Monday--The Bar Mitzvah Edition

2008-06-16T19:49:00.000-07:00

So we had a bar mitzvah. What can I say? It was delightful. After a little tiny mini freakout as the guests started arriving, MonkeyBoy (or should I switch to MonkeyMan?) collected himself and did an absolutely fabulous job. With the best ever bar mitzvah tutor at his side, he helped lead prayers and songs, read his 12 verse Torah portion flawlessly, and delivered a drash (an interpretation of his Torah reading) that was clear and well-received. Best of all, he had a wonderful time and enjoyed being king for the day.

My Torah reading went so smoothly that I might just step up to read a bit more often. That was mostly due to MonkeyBoy's help which shows just how much he's learned. I gave up on the DPS. I knew I wouldn't be able to say what I needed to say without crying, so what was the point? What MonkeyBoy knows is that he is loved, not only by his family, but by a whole community of friends and family who came to support him on a very special day.

None of this could have come together as smoothly as it did without all the hard work of many, many friends and family members who helped with food, flowers, photos, set-up, delivery, and a hundred different things that needed to be done. Our guests were generous in their support of MonkeyBoy's mitzvah project and the kids at Kateri Park will now be well supplied with pencils, notebooks, and other school supplies for the foreseeable future. Anything I asked for I got from so many people I hardly know how to start thanking everyone. An event like this makes me realize how very lucky I am to be part of a warm, caring Jewish community and an even wider community of friends who came from near and far to be with us.

My New Hero

2008-06-10T22:07:00.000-07:00

I just learned about Doug Ward through a local homeschooling list. He's just been suspended for refusing to give his special ed students a standardized test they have no chance of passing.

Having been in the position of being forced to give inappropriate standardized test to students I completely understand his reluctance to participate or subject his students to the ordeal. I've been forced to give kids with a 1st grade English reading level 10th grade tests. Why? Because our program's funding is dependent on compliance with the NCLB regulations. I'm told our results don't matter and that I should tell my students "it doesn't matter". They get to feel incompetent and be told I'm wasting their time. What a deal!

This high stakes testing nonsense absolutely burns me up. So kudos to you, Doug Ward, for standing up for your students.

Mosaic Monday

2008-06-09T19:57:00.000-07:00

1. mirna's heart *, 2. fringe, 3. worn, 4. Momiji at the Lakeside, 5. Blue World, 6. Untitled, 7. Orange on Gold, 8. 0604 Rockin' Bokeh 156/365, 9. Possibly maybe, 10. summer cartwheels (day 7 | year 2.5), 11. Stargazing, 12. noon, 13. Dresses, 14. post_20080608170302, 15. Chinatown, 16. Colours of Little India

It's been a while, hasn't it?

Very Superior?

2008-06-07T23:00:00.000-07:00

I find it hard to believe. Maybe it's due to making sure my children have a religious education. Or perhaps it's my lack of red nail polish. The 1930's Marital Scale is an unsettling look at the ideal spouse of days gone by.

As a 1930s wife, I am
Very Superior

Take the test!

Thanks to the always entertaining Red Molly for this much needed distraction.

Cleaning

2008-06-06T15:36:00.000-07:00

I hired a charming young lady to come help me clean today and I feel so weird about it. I've done this exactly twice before. The first time I had been sick with bronchial crud for weeks and Passover was rapidly approaching. A group of homeschooled teens were trying to raise money for a trip to Washington DC so it felt like a good thing to help them out and let them help me out. And they were awesome--my own teen has shown no such work ethic around here. The second paid house cleaner came the day before The Dark Lord's bar mitzvah. She was a friend of a friend in a bit of a tight spot so I felt like I was doing her a favor.

This time I had a young woman in my class who was trying to get her housecleaning business off the ground. A few weeks ago I helped her make fliers and business cards and arranged to have her come work for me a time or two before the bar mitzvah. As happens all too often with my students, she's disappeared. She hasn't come to class in a couple of weeks and her voice mail is full. For all I know, she's been deported which at least means she gets to be with her son again so it wouldn't be all bad. For whatever reason, she's gone.

Thus, I ended up searching Craigslist the other night and came up with Sarah who promised to bring her own eco-friendly cleaning supplies. She showed up on time and got to work and has been going non-stop all afternoon.

The thing is, it feels weird to me. I don't know that I'll ever be one of those folks who finds housekeeping to be a deeply spiritual practice. But it does seem that I should be able to manage far better than I do. Mostly I just ignore anything beyond the basics of clean dishes and clothes. When forced (usually due to impending visitors) to clean properly I start out with the best of intentions, wander into another room to put something away, and thus begins a seemingly infinite sequence of distractions at the end of which I find myself both exhausted and baffled by how little I managed to accomplish.

The fabulous Sarah has been working nonstop for the past 3 hours. I've tried to move some of the junk out of her way but she doesn't seem to mind. I imagine that since it's not her junk, it's not a big deal to just work around things rather than get bogged down in decisions about what goes where.

I did a few paid housekeeping stints myself when I was younger and always felt resentful and somewhat superior in that I was sure I'd always be able to clean up my own messes. Hiring someone to clean? How lame. How bourgeois. But that was before kids. These days I find the chaos overwhelming and there's always something or someone demanding my attention more loudly than my kitchen floor. I want to be that serene mother who keeps things under control. I always think that, given a free weekend, I can get it together. Well this is the last weekend before the bar mitzvah and I finally know when I'm beat. I still have a lot of things to do that only I can do so it's not the worst thing in the world to have someone handle the cleaning, is it?

Not Exactly What I'd Hoped...

2008-06-05T19:26:00.000-07:00

...but I'd settle for Edwards for VP. If you feel the same way, sign the petition here. I have no idea if it will do any good, but I do know it would be a lot easier for me to vote for Obama with Edwards on the ticket and the polls say it would be a winning combo.

Where I've been....

2008-06-05T11:48:00.001-07:00

With 8 days to go before The Big Event I've been just a wee bit busy. I'll spare my readers the full list as it's just short of dizzying but I can say that this much busyness and productivity is quite contrary to my nature.We had 4 yards of garden mulch delivered the other day and it's mostly spread out and working its magic in the rain. My inherited rose garden no longer looks abandoned and overall the yard is looking almost summer ready. The only drawback? I was so sore from shoveling yesterday that I could barely walk and my students were making abuelita jokes about me.What else? Surely the celestial trumpets sounded again last weekend when I found and bought a perfectly respectable brand new ensemble to wear on the big day which, I'm told, allows me to still look like me only dressed up. This is no small thing as there are few things I hate more than shopping for new clothes. I buy nearly everything for under $5 per item at my local thrift store. Shelling out big bucks for brand new isn't easy but if not now, when? At least they're things I'll wear again.

I finished a hat for MonkeyBoy while watching possibly the saddest Bollywood movie ever. There was something very satisfying about brushing away movie tears while finishing the final stitches on the hat, which was a real kick to knit. The "kool" thing about The Koolhaas Hat is that it's based on the wonderful lines at the Seattle Public Library which we so enjoyed visiting in April. One last thing: There's a picture of MonkeyBoy in today's Oregonian along with an article written about local kids' bar/bat mitzvah projects. They didn't really get it right when they talked to him, but he's feeling like a rock star today with his picture in the paper.

This weekend is the final push: Torah readings, clean clothes, clean house, more list making, and so on. We will be going to a party celebrating an old friend's new love which is just so cool.

Encouraging

2008-06-03T19:20:00.000-07:00

I'm delighted to see a fatwa against terrorism. Thanks to Colleen for the heads up on this one!

Threads

2008-05-28T20:16:00.000-07:00

The tallit is coming along nicely with special thanks to the expert sewing skills of my awesome stepmother . Her stint sewing costumes for drag queens left her absolutely fearless when it comes to sewing shiny, slippery, silky fabrics. What took me hours and caused tears of frustration she handled with utter aplomb.

All that remains now is a bit more handwork. I've put in quite a few hours already, much of it in front of the TV which is about the only way I can sit still long enough to get anything accomplished. Without that anchor I tend to flit from one thing to another getting exactly nothing done. My child comes by his ADD tendencies quite honestly.

Anyway....here's the thing that I wanted to write about because it was just a brief moment, but it was huge. I was watching a fascinating PBS documentary the other night. The Jewish Americans documents the history of the Jews in the US in classic PBS style with interviews, old photos, music and so on. The episode I was watching covered World War II and the post-war period. I thought a lot about my great uncle, a WWII veteran, when the narrator mentioned WWII being the first experience many American Jews had living among non-Jews.

At one point a veteran began to speak about his experience as a Jewish solider liberating the Mauthausen concentration camp in 1945. My great uncle was also a US soldier present at the liberation of Mauthausen and I've never forgotten his haunting stories. With horrifying images floating across the screen I looked down at the work in my hands, the tallit for my son's bar mitzvah, and I became simply overwhelmed.

I'm occasionally struck by the twist of fate that sent my relatives across an ocean while others stayed behind. Many of my Jewish relatives left Europe well before the madness started but I've always wondered about those who remained in Russia, Hungary, and Romania; distant relatives forgotten by the American immigrants. How easily I and my children might have simply never lived or worse, died a horrible death simply because we are Jewish. I don't spend a lot of time entertaining such thoughts but sometimes there they are.

And suddenly it seemed almost miraculous that here we are in 2008, about to celebrate another bar mitzvah in our family. I've gotten caught up in details like invitations and recipes and who's wearing what but there's a whole other facet to this. I don't think I'm putting this into words at all eloquently but the fact that there are still Jewish children coming of age in this world is a huge and wonderful thing.

Details

2008-05-24T22:14:00.000-07:00

With exactly three weeks to go until the bar mitzvah, things have been pretty busy around here. There’s a lot to deal with. Three of the 5 of us are learning Torah readings which is a pretty intense process. I still need to figure out what I’m wearing and there’s little in this world I hate as much as shopping for clothes. Because I have some wonderful friends, I am not personally doing much cooking or even organizing the cooks for the post-service luncheon, yet there’s still plenty to think about. Tablecloths? Napkins? Drinks? I am so not a detail person.

And then there are bigger issues such as The Dreaded Parental Speech (hereafter known as the DPS). This had me in a complete tizzy before The Dark Lord’s bar mitzvah. It’s common practice in our synagogue for the parents to stand up in front of everyone and say Deep and Meaningful things to the bar/bat mitzvah kid. I can get pretty nervous about reading Torah given that both Hebrew and melody are involved and neither are strengths for me. The fact is that 99% of the folks in attendance won’t even know if I make a mistake and there will be people there to help me out of I get stuck.

But the DPS is another matter. It’s in English. It’s emotional and big. There you are, in front of the whole world, trying to say something your kid will remember forever and mostly just wanting to cry. No pressure. None at all. So there's that to think about.

But at least the Torah reading is going relatively well apart from a few freakouts. Thanks to MonkeyBoy’s excellent skills, not only does he have his 12 verses pretty well down, but he can coach me and his brother as well.

With 50 million things to do, wouldn’t you know I’d get hit with piles of ideas for things I want to make. The tallit is coming along but I’m also itching to do lots more sewing. I blame it on this book which has filled me with fantasies of hand sewing a complete, one-of-a-kind, richly embellished wardrobe. I was so excited about the techniques in here that I had to give something a try and decided on a gift for MonkeyBoy (who never reads my blog but if you've dropped byMB, just run along, will you?)

Most of the projects in the book use recycled cotton knits from deconstructed T-shirts, which is not only wonderfully soft but makes connections with the author's hometown in cotton country. Many of the projects are embellished with reverse appliqué, a technique that appears fairly simple but actually requires a number of different color choices making for a rich design. Obviously I wasn't going to go with the leafy floral designs in the book, but then it hit me--Hebrew letters would make a lovely design. I quickly hit upon the idea of working with his Hebrew name and made up a freezer paper stencil, painted the design on thrift store T-shirt, pinned on the contrasting fabric from another old T-shirt and had the whole thing stitched up in a couple of hours. I may even get some help from The Spouse with a design for the back. His name means dove in Hebrew so we thought that might be a fitting image but one thing I don't do is draw so that's up to him.I love how it came out (except for the fabric paint that went a little more towards pink than purple, darn it) and I can't wait to spend more time exploring these techniques. But first I guess I'd better focus on what needs to be done in the next few weeks without totally losing my cool.

Tonight as MonkeyBoy was helping me study my Torah reading (in the midst of a massive thunderstorm) I began to despair of ever learning it properly given all I had to do in the coming weeks. He suggested that what I needed to do was to hire a mom to worry about the bar mitzvah details so I could focus on my Torah reading and finishing his tallit. Not a bad idea---any Rent-A-Moms out there?

In Progress

2008-05-19T11:06:00.000-07:00

Thanks to the kindness of a friend with both skills and the patience to fiddle around with Hebrew fonts, I was able to transfer the tallit blessing onto a piece of silk using inkjet transfer paper. How cool is that?

The embroidered text is the Hebrew blessing one says when putting on the tallit. It's kind of silly in a way, because everyone who needs to know it usually gets it down pretty quickly. Like most Hebrew blessings it follows a standard format with a few words tossed in at the end for the particular occasion. Still, it's pretty standard to include the text on the atarah, which is the piece that helps the wearer figure out how to put the tallit on.

I'm not so great with embroidery though it's one of many skills I'd like to improve and use more often in my projects. But I'm really enjoying this part. It's not terribly challenging (other than I really need those bifocals now) but each letter is different and requires an assessment of how to fill the space. It's a little bit meditative and not hard to re-do when I screw up. Oh, and it looks smashing, if I do say so myself.

Don't Forget to Vote

2008-05-19T08:13:00.002-07:00

For those in Oregon, I just wanted to throw out a reminder to vote. Now.

It's too late for the mail, but you can drop your ballot at numerous sites throughout the state until 8 pm on Tuesday, May 20.

I kind of lost interest in the presidential race when my guy dropped out but I'd planned on writing him in on the primary ballot. However I gave up on that idea once Edwards endorsed Obama. I really hoped he would keep his mouth shut and keep working on the progressive issues no one else would touch. Politics as usual, I guess. Obama might get some white guy votes. I wonder what Edwards will get out of it.

At least I got to vote for this guy, a true progressive with a vision for our state that includes universal health care, affordable college for everyone, and a serious attitude towards global warming.

My boys asked me to take them to yesterday's Obama rally here in Portland. I probably should have but the combination of heat and crowds, not to mention my general lack of enthusiasm for Obama made me say "no". I don't think we were missed among 70,000+ people who did show up.

He's OK, I guess. I'll vote for him but I just can't seem to do so with the passion and starry-eyed awe that so many Obama supporters seem to exhibit. What am I not getting?

Silver Linings

2008-05-16T23:25:00.001-07:00

One of the exciting things about becoming a bar mitzvah is that it is the first time a young person gets to wear a tallit in public. Most families we know make a big deal out of the tallit. Either one is specially made after much consideration, or perhaps handed down from a relative. With a weaver in the family (my mother), we expected nothing less than handwoven for The Dark Lord's bar mitzvah. MonkeyBoy, on the other hand, was offered weaving lessons from a good friend and the opportunity to make his own which seemed like a very generous and exciting offer at the time though even then I suspected it would be too much given this friend's often poor health.

The weaving lessons began well over a year ago and MonkeyBoy and his teacher have had great times together. To date I've seen exactly one completed project and became understandably worried giving the rapidly approaching event. I was reassured numerous times that all was well and on track. Then, quite suddenly, with exactly 4 weeks to go, I was informed last night that it would be impossible to complete the project on time. Now I find that with approximately 275 things I need to complete before June 14, I have the added obligation of finding Mr Picky a tallit that would satisfy him. This is the boy who hand colored 80+ invitations so it's safe to say he has his aesthetic standards and takes them seriously. Also, Portland is not New York City or even Los Angeles. We don't have nice Judaica shops where we could browse and compare and we've had no interest in risking mail order.So what's a crafty mama to do? I still have most of the bolt of silk I used to make my tallit years ago and MonkeyBoy found that acceptable. We spent quite some time gathering trims and supplies today and I have to say that I was surprised by the colors that drew him. This is a kid who normally goes for crazy bright colors. The yarmulkes we ordered for the bar mitzvah are purple velvet with silver rickrack, of all things. But what really caught him today was some lovely but rather sedate ribbon with a ginkgo design in slightly off greens. We used that as a starting point and chose accent fabrics and trims accordingly.

There aren't a lot of rules about this particular garment's construction except that it must be 4-cornered, with tzitzit at each corner. The tzitzit are sets of strings tied in a precise formula, kind of a Jewish macrame if you will. These four sets of threads on four corners are the only clearly proscribed element and I've seen lovely variations on this basic idea including elegant vintage lace and exuberant Guatemalan ikat.

While I expect to be doing most of the work on this myself, I realized there was no reason why MonkeyBoy couldn't learn to run the sewing machine and make the corner squares through which the tzitzit will be threaded. Tonight we retired to the cool of our basement for sewing lessons and he did well though I did mention that there was little point in my drawing seam lines on the fabric since he seemed to be ignoring them anyway.While I really wish time wasn't a factor, I am delighted that I get to do this for (and with) my son.

Whew!

2008-05-15T19:03:00.001-07:00

With the help of a little Valium I made it through 3 hours in the dentist's chair yesterday for a root canal and two crowns. While the dentist and his staff are very kind and patient but I think what really made yesterday tolerable (apart from the Valium) was that for the first time ever, a dentist actually listened to me about my sensitivity to epinephrine and used an alternative anesthetic. The alternative's effect is much shorter so I ended up having somewhere around 14 separate injections. My mouth is quite sore today, but it's so minimal compared to not feeling like I'm having a heart attack. I really think all my dental anxieties over the years can be directly traced to this one drug which is bad for me. What a different experience when someone actually listens.

So, for anyone in the Portland area, needing an excellent mercury-free dentist, do let me know. I get a $20 credit for each patient I refer. Since I still need another $2000 worth of work before my mouth is mercury free, every little bit will help.