My Winning Personality

Luke, Logan, and Chloe Leffler

2009-11-15T19:22:00.000-08:00

A Reflective Life

2008-12-31T04:16:00.000-08:00

"Over the margins of life comes a whisper, a faint call, a premonition of richer living which we know we are passing by. Strained by the very mad pace of our daily outer burdens, we are further strained by an inward uneasiness, because we have hints that there is a way of life vastly richer and deeper than all this hurried existence, a life of unhurried serenity and peace and power." Thomas Kelly

This year I will try harder to slow down, listen to God's voice, and enjoy my life a little bit more. Happy New Year

Happy First Birthday, Corban

2008-12-31T04:11:00.001-08:00

6 Things I Learned At The Pumpkin Patch

2008-10-11T16:11:00.000-07:00

1. A bus packed with kindergarteners will eventually start to smell like sweaty gym socks and pork roast.
2. If the teacher gives you 2 students, and gives 4-5 students to other chaperones, it's not because you are her favorite.
3. It is possible to lose a child more than 10 times in a span of 60 minutes.
4. Licking is another form of hand washing.
5. Hay mazes are about as fun as a pap smear, but not quite.
6. Kindergarten boys can smell resee cups from 10' away.

That's What You Get For Zero Dollars

2008-10-04T18:39:00.000-07:00

Mel: Will you take pictures of our family?
Shannon: No
Mel: Why?!
Shannon: Because you are too picky and you won't be happy.
Mel: Please, I'll make chili
Shannon: ok.

If It Weren't For Panty Hose

2008-10-03T10:45:00.000-07:00

Those who know me well, know that eventually the topic will turn to panty hose. Everything always comes back around to panty hose. You see, panty hose are my arch nemesis.

There was a time during my college days when I considered the idea of "Political Science" as a major. I guess I should say minor because finding a husband was always my major. And that worked out well by the way.

With definite views and concerns in politics, I was sure I could make a difference.
1. I'm loud. 2. I like to argue. 3. I'm good at making up stuff.

With his wiry thin hair and red face, Dr. Glenn Martin (God rest his dear soul) strongly advised me to "throw that crazy psychology degree in the trash and change the world!" After careful consideration at "The Wildcat" over a Dr. Pepper and chicken sandwich I realized, politics just wasn't for me. The reason? Panty hose. Everyone knows female politicians are required to wear panty hose. And this little activist SHALL NEVER wear panty hose. My sister made me wear panty hose in her wedding, I'm sure as punishment. And I cried. So, because of that darn nylon faux skin, my political career was snuffed out before it ever began.

During the last two months my political addiction has swelled to epic proportions. I almost can not take it any longer! (As I type Fox News is on the t.v. and also my computer.) During the debates I get hives and have to eat jello. It calms my stomach.

I could of been the one debating Joe Biden last night! That could be me up on that stage. Would you vote for me? Even if I was wearing knee socks? That could be me. I'm thinking though, if he disagreed with me I'd probably just start crying and it'd all be over. I'm also thinking crying is a definate no no in a vp debate. So maybe psychology wasn't such a bad choice after all.

My slogan could be...
What's the difference between a hillbilly and a pit bull? ...
teeth.

The Ring

2008-09-30T11:32:00.000-07:00

I recently purchased this ring for my friend, Melinda. Aren’t her hands pretty? I don’t think the ring is “her thing”. She’s just so practical. I think she would have preferred the $3.99 I spent on the ring in cash so she could buy fabric softener or something more useful. Just like the time she was in the hospital. She had her lung removed- ok, only 20% of her lung. Anyway, I bought her a latch hook rug kit. Which I thought was a brilliant choice. I mean, what else are you gonna do while you get your lung taken out? Thankfully Melinda made a full recovery. She’s back to her youthful, beautiful self. The rug… I’m afraid it did not make it. It would have been so beautiful. I forgive you Melinda.

edited to add: 3 years ago today Melinda had her lung operation. Today she's a healthy girl who enjoys long walks on the beach, being with her kids, and driving me crazy when we go shopping together. Love you Mel!

My Man With His Little Ass

2008-09-28T19:11:00.000-07:00

2008-09-28T18:48:00.000-07:00

Here We Go...

2008-09-07T17:12:00.000-07:00

The topic tonight at bedtime... birds and bees and what happens when birds and bees get together. Thankfully, Daddy, the Child and Adolescent Therapist goes over the details.

Can someone please come over and hold my hand?

As I eavesdrop, I have never heard Craig say the words... breast and vagina so many times in one setting. Wow, this is weird.

As with all my shortcomings, I blame my Mother. Her idea of the "birds and the bees" involved a spaghetti party where we skim over the part where "Aunt Martha" comes to visit. Completely ignoring the part where "Uncle Ken gets-to-know Aunt Martha". I still have so many questions. Mom, call me.

Let's stop talking about this.

Look, here's Rob- with panty hose on his head. That Rob, he's so crazy.

We Interrupt This Blogcast... for the RNC

2008-09-04T18:40:00.000-07:00

Until then... feast your eyes on this lovely specimen.

"Penelope"

Let The Wild Rumpus Start!

2008-08-28T18:31:00.000-07:00

Life is so hard with both my boys in school. Like today for instance, I had to go to the beauty shop without any kids. Can you imagine? That was hard.

And then there's that time I had to go to Wal-Mart by myself. Can you believe it? That was hard too.

Actually, I kid.

THIS IS SO FREAKIN AWESOME!!!!!!

Remember that post where I cried and moaned about my "baby going to school"? That was the old me. That was before I had the taste of sweet, sweet, freedom. Did you know that when your last child goes off to kindergarten angels come down from heaven and sing "The Hallelujah Chorus" in your kitchen. They do. Or maybe that was me and instead of "The Hallelujah Chorus" it was "Hurt So Good". I always had a soft spot for John Cougar- we go way back.

More Today Than Yesterday

2008-08-26T05:39:00.000-07:00

Thirteen years ago today, I squeezed myself into a tiny white dress. I was young and naive and had no idea the gift I was being given. Every day since August 26, 1995 I have slowly opened the gift and realized how blessed I am.

Today as we hurry about, packing lunches, feeding the dog, going to work, etc. - I celebrate quietly. I married a great guy. Happy anniversary Craig- I love you.

Too Much Drama For Your Mama.

2008-08-25T17:24:00.000-07:00

In the dark recesses of my sock drawer, today I found this story I wrote for Spencer. It was after the first week of school last year- which would have been second grade. He was being very sensitive and had every complaint in the book. Finally one night, as all good mothers do, I realized the humor in it all and wrote him this story for his lunch box.
I even illustrated the story but for now you will have to close your eyes and imagine your own pictures.

Spencer's Very Bad, Very Sad Week
written by his mother.

Spencer W's back to school week really did stink!

On Sunday... he couldn't sleep not one little wink!
His blankets and Livie, in one big heap!

On Monday things didn't get any better. His head felt "weird" and his big toe hurt.

Tuesday was the pits! His Mom made him eat a whole spoon of green beans. Nasty!

On Wednesday he was so upset he quit bells and then started back up with bells. Then out of nowhere, he fell off his stool.

On Thursday his bus driver made his sit by a girl- Oh my.

last page: Dear Spencer, I hope your week gets better starting with today . I love you. Love, Mom

What Do You Get When You Marry A Therapist And An Unstable Woman?

2008-08-22T19:58:00.000-07:00

... a kindergarten boy who says at supper, "Mom, you make my heart hurt when you make me go to school".

This was the week of drama at The W House. Actually, every week is dramatic at The W House come to think of it.

Landon has not enjoyed being seperated from his eternal Activities Coordinator, aka his Mother. School has been a thorn in his side. The nurse at his school even called me a couple of times on my cell phone.

"Yes, Mrs. W... your son seems to have a headache."

"Um. No. My son does not have a headache rather, an aversion to your educational institution. His father says under no uncertain terms am I allowed to pick him up from school. Even though I cried every single day of 1st grade and I know the cross he carries. So, I'll call my friend Angie, and maybe she will pick him up."

But lo, Angie would not pick him up. Something about it's the law, life is hard, yada, yada, yada. So every day I'd greet him by the exit doors of his school. Forlorne, beat down, and just wanting his Sponge Bob with a side of order of Moma's snacks. I can't bear to tell him that if he's like me, he will never get over this feeling.

Wanted: Good Attourney- Will Trade 3 Bushels of Corn and 1 Used Ishuffle for Attorney Fees

2008-08-19T15:16:00.000-07:00

Looking for attorney. Must love dogs and women who like to over-explain things.

Defendant: innocent tiny/fluffy law abiding dog happened to leave said yard a couple of times (6) and chased a naked man riding a motorized skate board with a seat, carrying a chihuahua.

Plaintiff: over weight, naked skate board riding 60'ish year old wearing skin tight flesh colored shorts and no shirt. Carrying a chihuahua.

"I plead the fifth."

Let Me Tell You About My Grandchildren, My Skin Disease, And My Neighbor's Cousin Who Knows Somebody Who Got Pregnant With A Turkey Baister

2008-08-15T19:47:00.000-07:00

Ok. I'm talking about it.

I've got poison ivy.

And it itches. For 3 weeks it itches.

I obtained a steroid off the black market- but it was only a 3 day supply. So, for three days I stopped itching- but grew facial hair, bulked up, and picked fights with random strangers.

She said: "What you looking at?"
Random stranger said: "Uh, I was just looking at the price tag on the loaf of bread."
She said: "Good, let's keep it that way."

Now I'm still itching, steroid is gone, I have no friends left, and I can't find my tweezers.

What would you do?

Celebrate Good Times Come On!

2008-08-15T09:01:00.000-07:00

There's a party going on right here. Because I just found out I'm accepted into Graduate School.

I Wanna Shine

2008-08-14T16:58:00.001-07:00

Tonight, I've got nothing.

In the wonderful words of David Crowder...

"But this light that shines on me, shines on you. And makes everything beautiful again."

It'll be alright.

Recent Email With My High School Friend That I Found On Facebook

2008-08-10T19:43:00.000-07:00

From: Shannon White [mailto:shannonofthewoods@yahoo.com]
Sent: Friday, August 08, 2008 8:43 AM
To: MyPinkMexico@gmail.com
Subject: I remembered something

Mary Dawn of Creation,

One time at a dance in High School you told me I danced wierd, but you kinda liked it.

What did you mean? Was it all the snapping? Or was it my double-jointedness?

Shannon White

Mary Dawn says:

you know, i dont' remember exactly how you danced...can you make a video and post it on YouTube to refresh my memory? hee

Mom, Would You Please Read This To Daddy

2008-08-08T18:43:00.000-07:00

Dear father,

I know you are a shy man. I realize you have never looked a camera in the eye. Remember the time you yelled at the school girl for mocking your V.W. Bug with a hay bale in the back seat? I would never bring that up in public. But, you weren't too shy then. And Daddy, do you really think that pillow hides the fact that you are prancing around in your tightie whities with those lilly white legs? Come on, that's not too shy.

So would you please do the hand bone for my internet friends? They won't look. We will all look away and just listen. Please, just think about it.

Love,
Shannon

Missing Home

2008-08-07T18:03:00.000-07:00

Sometime in the late 60's, my uncle Jack had a car. Being one of 9 siblings, a car was a big deal. So what if the car had no seats?! Yes, you read that correctly. His car had no seats. So of course this is why he drove around with kitchen chairs as seats.

Windows down, shirt sleeves rolled up, no shoes, and life was good.

Mom said this worked out o.k. except for the sudden stops. I believe it was George whose chair flipped back when they came to a sudden stop upon arrival at my Aunt Jennies store. But it's all good. George is a good sport. And Aunt Jennie probably had a mean plate of biscuits and gravy waiting for them.

Look What I Found

2008-08-06T19:53:00.000-07:00

If school doesn't start soon, I'm gonna open this puppy. And down all .50 ml!

Another Step Towards Adult-hood And Parental Abandonment

2008-08-06T05:43:00.000-07:00

The day finally came on Monday for Landon to get his kindergarten shots. The waiting room was stuffed to the brim with sweaty 5 year olds and their sweaty parents. One by one kids came out from the shot room- happy as a lark. I'd say, "see, it must not be too bad, she's acting just fine". With each child, my anxiety for Landon lessoned.

Then it came to be Landon's turn. And he flipped out. Not just a little bit flipped, totally flipped. Imagine the sound of a hungry baby cougar in the wild that has lost his home to evil man, due to urban sprawl. That was the sound Landon made- through 4 shots.

3 days later, as a sign of the Lord's provision, Landon is still wearing his badges of honor- the band-aids.

This morning we are going for him to get tested for kindergarten. I've been through this before. She will tell me he has poor small motor skills and didn't know the answers to a lot of their questions. He can't write his name and couldn't point to the cow. (Inspite of 3 years of pre-school).

And I'll say, "Oh you mean like a 5 year old boy who just wants to play with friends all day?"

But I won't be concerned. This child is smart. He'll be fine. He does know what a cow is, he's just refusing to play her kindergarten mind games. She'll see. He'll be fine.

Party at Camp

2008-08-03T10:06:00.000-07:00

Recently Craig celebrated his 40th birthday. I told him I had gotten him a kitten. He was not happy about that. But I was just messing with him. I love to do that. That's why he likes me so much. I entertain him. Get your mind out of the gutter. Why do you always have to go there? What I'm saying is that I am so much fun to live with. Constant party- that's what I am.

Spencer has my sense of humor. He had Craig totally convinced that he was getting a kitty. It's scary how good he was at tricking Craig. That boy. Where'd he get all those shenanigans?

Some of our friends went together and got Craig this picnic table. We blind folded him and brought him the table with a Dairy Queen ice cream cake on top. How fun is that! I love our friends. And ice cream cake.