Planet Sven

xtreme unicycle

2008-10-02T17:32:00.000-07:00

Walked the butte. Standard route up to the Orchard Loop, around, and back.

Didn't take aspirin, and consequently had some head pains. Not pointy and at the very top of my head, as they are sometimes. Instead a duller pain, slightly to the right, and as if it were more inside my brain.

Meh. Makes me worry that I'm going to have a stroke at some point. Keep on thinking that I need to do some research on preventative measures -- but it's a scary thing to look at face on.

On the way back, I passed a unicycler on the Elderberry Trail. I've heard of this before -- mountain bikers who use unicycles for an even crazier ride. He was 40-something, and had a steely look to him that made me not want to strike up conversation.

walk - thinking about monster month

2008-09-30T15:23:00.000-07:00

Butte notes:

Did a quick butte walk... Standard route to the Orchard Loop and back. Walked more quickly than usual -- only took 52 minutes. Remembered my aspirin.

The house on 141st place with the little lawn statues has added Barbie Pink highlights to their house. It doesn't match the rest of the house's paint very well -- but it's daring, so I approve.

On the Raymond St. entrance to the butte, someone's put more bottles and cans on tree branches. Grrr. Must take a bag with me to pick up trash when I see it.

Saw 8 sheep (one black) and a cow in the Russian pasture.

Spent most of the walk thinking about Monster Month 2008. No grand insights, just daydreaming.

butte: maps & mantis

2008-09-23T17:07:00.000-07:00

Took a walk on the butte... Wound up being 2 hrs instead of 1 due to interesting sights.

TRAIL NAME DISCREPANCIES

I'm trying to learn the trail names... But I've discovered that there are discrepancies in nomenclature. The main sign at the entry to the park doesn't show the Elderberry Trail or the Black Tailed Deer Trail. I'm also beginning to think that one or more of the trail markers may be mis-labeled.

The Elderberry Trail seems to overlap the Wild Horse Trail, which is a big loop. Elderberry leads to a little bridge across a stream, after which the trail up to the top is labeled "Cedar Grove Trail." I think that marker must be wrong... It makes more sense that Cedar Grove heads north from the intersection with Mt. Hood Trail, crosses the stream, and heads up the next hill.

The map at the restrooms shows the Mt. Hood trail leading all the way down to the Springwater. Again, I think the map is wrong. I think that the lower stretch, which passes by the Ellis Street Entrance is actually the Black Tailed Deer Trail.

I also note that the Raymond Street Entrance is not on the map.

WILDLIFE

As I was heading up 141st, I noticed that the house at the tippy-top has a lockbox on the door. An animal control truck was parked at the butte entrance. It makes me wonder if the occupants of that house have been evicted... But it might be unrelated.

As I entered the butte, I saw that there were four people in the wooded area near the far NW corner of the Russian sheep/goat pasture. I don't know what they were hunting for... But at one point I overheard a conversation about raccoons. Still, might be unrelated.

As I was coming up to the stream bridge, I saw a giant slug: yellow-green, with big black patches. I helped it "cross the road." Got my fingers stung by nettles in the process. Eek!

Saw a raptor with a white tail flying around the Meadowland area. Based on size, it may have been a hawk or falcon. It seemed to land in the grass for a while, then take off again.

Best of all: I saw a praying mantis on the signpost at the head of the Mountain View Trail. It was eating a wasp, and I stood and watched for about 20 minutes.

The mantis was holding the dead wasp in one hand, eating its head. I watched it eat the whole thing -- winding up with the wasp's butt. It would chew at the edge of the wasp's outer shell... Then it ate the meat inside. It pulled off a wing and ate it. With the exception of one leg that dropped, nothing was wasted.

The meal took about 15 minutes. You could hear the mantis chewing the wasp's hard bits. Its head moved around quite a bit on its neck -- and its throat looked like a dryer hose tube. When it was done, it licked its "hands" and wrists. I'm not sure if I imagined seeing a tongue or not; but it did have six little fingers around its mouth to help pull the food in.

All during the meal, the mantis was standing on the *side* of the post, with its head pointed down. At one point I was amazed to see its tail end open up and a little turd extrude -- upward! After the meal, it moved slowly sideways in a gentle rocking motion, as if to imitate a stick in the wind, and it brought its arms tightly together.

ROUTE & BUTTE NOTES

* I went up 141st.
* Entered via the Raymond Street entrance.
* Followed the Elderberry on its southern loop to the little stream bridge.
* Didn't cross the bridge, instead switched over to the Cedar Grove trail, heading back up the hill.
* I'm not sure, but I may have come out on the Meadowland trail, which connected to Goldfinch.
* Followed Goldfinch down the hill, northward then turning east to where the service entrance to the Powell Butte Reservoir is.
* Stopped at the parking lot / restrooms to consult the map.
* Traveled up the paved Mountain View trail halfway, then broke from it at the Meadowland trail.
* Meadowland connected to Goldfinch, and I followed it downhill northward again.
* Where Meadowland bends east, I took an unmarked trail westward, which brought me to an intersection of Meadowland, Elderberry, and the north service road.
* Took Elderberry home. (Discovered that it runs parallel to the service road for a stretch.)

The recent planned burn also affected areas on the north side of the butte, which I hadn't seen before. The areas north of the service road were burned -- and a large area where the Mountain View trail crosses the service road (quite near to the parking lot).

In a quasi-magical moment, the shadow of a two person plane crossed over me. Shadows of airplanes are rare and strange things to see on the ground... Even more so to have one run directly over you.

prewalkupied

2008-09-11T15:38:00.000-07:00

Butte walk notes:

Forgot to check the Cedar Grove area for chainsaw work, and forgot to take a camera to document the planned burn... But I remembered my aspirin and had no head twinges.

I went up to the Orchard Trail loop, went around it to the east side, and then on my way back took the Wild Hawthorn. That connected to the Black Tailed Deer trail, which I took to the Ellis Street entrance (Ellis & 145th).

Twice today I've smelled the odor of paint VOCs... Once at the end of the block, once at the top of the hill. I haven't identified who's painting their house yet, though.

Horse shoe prints in the powdery dust of a trail are sweet.

Not a very relaxing walk, mentally. I'm preoccupied with Facebook and email and how much time they have the capacity to suck up. I've only just dipped my toe into the world of "social networking" and so far... Is "loathe" too strong a word?

I never liked chat rooms. Facebook seems just as shallow -- but with gew-gaw on the sidebar.

It seems like everyone's doing it... Which forces me to ask myself: what is it that makes me different? Or what am I going to *say* makes me different, if I decide to walk out of that room?

chainsaws & fire

2008-09-10T13:27:00.000-07:00

Butte walk notes:

Did another hour-long walk on the butte today -- and remembered my aspirin this time. Only the slightest of head twinges. Hardly even worth mentioning.

Went up to the top to survey the planned burn. Circled the Orchard Loop and came back.

It turns out that the burn was on the south side this time: in the section marked "wildlife area," and in a tiny bit of the southern side of the Orchard Loop.

Last year's planned burn was on the north side. And two or three years ago there was an unplanned burn in the Orchard Loop area... Which I suspect instigated a new schedule of planned burns to get rid of excess "fuel."

There are still some blackberries on the Elderberry Trail. Not so sweet, but edible. I'm noticing that blackberries that are in shaded areas can ripen weeks later than ones that are in direct sun.

Saw a giant banana slug on the Elderberry trail. Dark green-yellow, with very large black spots. I have a pet theory that I should be able to see differences in the slugs' markings depending on where on the butte I go, because each area will have its own genetic heritage. I don't see slugs on the butte very often, though, so it will take time to accumulate data.

Saw a snake as I was coming up the Cedar Grove trail. It always startles me when they quickly slither away.

There were two trucks parked on the Goldfinch trail, and a sign said that they were spraying herbicides to take out invasive species. There was a major TV series on OPB this year about invasive species, and the OPB guide said that they were also coordinating a public campaign... They were making a big deal out of this, and I wonder if there's any connection to the activity on the butte. Possibly no -- but I wouldn't be surprised by yes, either.

Poetic image: The areas where they've burned the grass down look like the mussed pelt of a black bear, I thought.

On the way back, I heard two chainsaws at work... In the Cedar Grove area, I believe. I didn't have time to check it out; I hope they're only clearing a blocked path. I did think I heard a small tree fall, though.

sleepy butte walk

2008-09-09T15:33:00.000-07:00

Butte Walk Notes:

Stayed up too late last night trying to catch up a little on email. Six hours in a chair without moving -- no good for blood flow. Breaking my own rules: a 10 min walk for every 2 hours sitting.

So I just went on a 1 hr walk of the butte. Set the timer for 30 minutes and went.

I'm trying to learn the names of the paths up there. So here goes:

Raymond street entrance

Elderberry trail (to the little bridge across the stream)

Cedar Grove trail up to the top (past where they cut down our fave blackberry patch)

Goldfinch trail (just maybe 20 feet of that)

Orchard Loop trail (heading counter-clockwise, southward)

Wild Hawthorn trail (down toward the south, then turning to the east)

turned around and retraced my route before meeting the next connection

I haven't been on the Wild Hawthorn for a very long time, so it was like getting to explore it for the first time. There are a few spots on the path I like a lot... One where the trail spits in two to go around a nice old tree.

I'd forgot that the planned burn happened last Thursday, Sept 4 -- otherwise I would have headed up to the tip top to survey the meadowlands.

Also forgot, as I was leaving the house, to take my aspirin. Had some mild head pains on the way back... MUST learn to take the aspirin before walking when I haven't moved for a while.

Lots of birds on the path today... Makes me wonder about getting a bird-watching book, just to know our area a bit better.

Noticed at the entrance to the Russian horse pasture you can see a tree on their land that has fallen down, roots sticking up in the air. I wonder when that happened?

There's a white car parked near the top of 141st place that has cobwebs between the curb and its tire. I've become curious, and will be watching to see how long they stay there.

Is this thing on...?

2008-09-04T12:42:00.000-07:00

Neighborhood notes:

Walked for an hour, up to the top of the butte and back.

Saw two goats on the trail at the kissing trees, which had escaped from the Russian pasture.

Up at the top, I saw two fire department guys zooming around on 4-wheelers. Probably preparations for the planned burn... Oh! That's happening today!

Saw a swaztika on one of the markers at the entrance to the orchard area. Probably the same individual that graffitied the Butte's south entrance.

On the way back I heard the Russian pasture woman shouting "kip kip kip kip! brrrrrrrr!" to call the goats (which were nowhere to be seen now).

On the way back down SE 141st place, it was Comcastipalooza. Five trucks, and four guys (that I could see) fussing with the various cable boxes on the road. Makes me wonder if our street will receive attention soon, since Comcast was responsible for hiring the surveyor that spray-painted on our driveway.

Took aspirin before going out. Sometimes when I haven't done anything cardiovascular for a while, I get an unpleasant pointed headache at the top of my head. I felt that a bit yesterday. The aspirin seemed to prevent it from ever happening today. Good to know.

suppose that an envelope is a spaceship

2006-04-17T13:07:00.000-07:00

This is an extremely odd line of thought -- but hear me out. In my experience, new lines of thought -- where you haven't developed language yet -- tend to emerge through metaphors. It feels like I'm onto something; I just don't know quite what yet.

1. Suppose that all art is a direct response to something -- that there is no such thing as spontaneous generation of an idea. Imagine that for every idea, you could put a tag on it, a label saying exactly which sources it is a response to...

2. Suppose that an envelope is a spaceship.

3. Suppose that a letter is a clone of your own brain. That is, by sitting down and writing out your ideas, you can create a six-foot-tall blue-eyed facsimile of your very being.

4. Suppose that the Milky Way, this spiral-armed galaxy, is populated with intelligent beings: one to a planet. Suppose that the closer you get to the center of the galxy, the more like yourself these beings are -- and at the edges of the galaxy, everyone is your complete opposite.

5. Suppose that all the beings in the galaxy are not anonymous, but rather have proper first names: Dwayne, Eleanor, Fritz, Jane.

6. Suppose that all the beings in the galaxy are made of the exact same stuff as you. We are all made of some sort of yogurt that congealed from milk that dripped down from the big black eternity above.

7. Suppose that there is no way to change the beings on the outer arms of the galaxy who you are in conflict with. Only they can change their own minds. If you object to their existence, you would ultimately have to murder them. But even in your anger, you can see that you can't condone murdering Dwayne, Eleanor, and Fritz...

8. Seeing as how the people closer to the center of the galaxy are very like you, and the people who are farther out are less like you, it's reasonable to assume that your friends (like Jane) are friends with some people who you personally couldn't stand to be with.

9. ...However, your clone has no such objections. If you send your paper clone in his/her spaceship out to a neighboring world, your friends could introduce the clone to their neighboring worlds -- but you wouldn't have to be subject to the stress of that encounter.

10. Presume that we are all trying to understand the world we are living in.

11. Art is an attempt, however indirect, to create an interpretation of experience.

12. Isolation is a terrible motivator. Being with a group of encouraging artists who are trying to express themselves in similar ways to you -- this is a great motivator. It is as if you all can see the same ghostly image, and are together trying to make-out its outline. The creative process is one of collectively trying to articulate what you see.

13. There can come a point where you have seen all that there is to see in your immediate vicinity. There is no inspiration, only boredom nearby. Inspiration comes from going farther out from the center of the galaxy, to places where you are seeing things that you don't recognize.

14. Suppose that in making your art you were meticulous about documenting precisely who and what you were responding to: both the truly alien, and the familiar.

15. Suppose that there is nothing inanimate in the galaxy. That everything that exists, exists because there is a living being -- with a proper name -- preserving it. Suppose that if you want to respond to these things, you had to speak directly to the beings that stand for them.

16. In a group you could create a clone collectively -- but it would be a giant built out of all of your bodies. The people on the outskirts of the galaxy would fear and reject this colossus. But a clone of a single person -- that could travel outward, staying overnight at friends' houses on the way, out to the edge of the galaxy. ...So long as you created the clone in good faith, imbuing it with your own personal essence, rather than attempting to build a soulless robot. (Who would invite a strange, anonymous robot to stay with their family?)

...Um, that's it. That's what I can dredge up at the moment. Looks like I'm noodling around with a metaphor for being alive, living in society, creativity, and ethics. Hm.

Or, call me Zoe

2006-03-04T23:12:00.000-08:00

You scored as Zoe Alleyne Washburne. The Soldier. You are the second in command, and that is fine. You like a chain of command, but only when the one in charge has earnt your respect. Those who earn your love or loyalty will find no one better to guard their back.

The Operative

94%

Zoe Alleyne Washburne

94%

River Tam

75%

Capt. Mal Reynolds

69%

Kaylee (Kaywinnet Lee) Frye

69%

Inara Serra

69%

Shepherd Derrial Book

56%

Simon Tam

56%

Hoban 'Wash' Washburne

56%

Jayne Cobb

Which Serenity character are you?
created with QuizFarm.com

gender questions

2006-02-11T11:58:00.000-08:00

Is there such a thing as a male brunette? Are only women brunettes? How odd... I feel like there must be this other species walking around among us: "the brunette menace".

A man can have blond hair -- but I don't think you'd say he IS a blonde ("Mark's a blonde") -- reducing his existence to hair. You might say he's a red-head, though. Are red-heads the most alien of the hair-people?

Is "brunette" the most feminizing hair color because it has the diminutive "ette" on the end?

...

Do boys start out loving dinosaurs, but then grow up to love robots? Are cars robots? Are soldiers robot dinosaurs?

call me Kaylee

2006-02-03T17:34:00.000-08:00

Via G: Which Serenity Character Are You?

Your results:
You are Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)

Kaylee Frye (Ship Mechanic)		90%
Malcolm Reynolds (Captain)		90%
Zoe Washburne (Second-in-command)		65%
Inara Serra (Companion)		60%
Dr. Simon Tam (Ship Medic)		60%
River (Stowaway)		55%
Derrial Book (Shepherd)		50%
Wash (Ship Pilot)		35%
Jayne Cobb (Mercenary)		30%
A Reaver (Cannibal)		20%
Alliance		20%

You are good at fixing things.
You are usually cheerful.
You appreciate being treated
with delicacy and specialness.

Click here to take the "Which Serenity character are you?" quiz...

chris mystery

2005-12-13T00:55:00.000-08:00

Bought the xmas vegetation today: tree, wreath, mistletoe, pointsettas. Yowza.

And I sent off all the presents to people in Tucson.

The tree is up, but undecorated. The house is vacuumed top to bottom. Groceries are in the fridge...

Mondays are my cleaning day. The two Mondays before today kinda got consumed by xmas shopping... Good to get the carpet clean again. I've been trying out a new schedule where I've got tasks defined for Monday, Wednesday, and Friday -- allowing Tuesdays and Thursdays to be overflow days. Tomorrow, then, I ought to be able to finish what didn't get done today; most importantly: bills.

Xmas shopping has sucked my soul out. But I may have just hit the tipping point... When I look at what's left to do, things are in pretty good shape. Haven't decided whether or not I'm done shopping for G.

Ah -- but no rest for the wicked, still. Need to be making progress on the Super8 final project. And I've gotta be researching house buying.

A first step in that direction: Tuesday and Thursday I'm going to go to a free class up in Vancouver on home buying. That ought to jump-start this project. After the initial burst of energy, it's been pretty much stalled for the past few weeks.

(2006 is coming. Eep.)

another pretty lie, this time about sleep and demons

2005-11-20T21:33:00.000-08:00

Maybe sleep is God's way of preventing us from becoming demons.

See, it's a well known fact (at least in China) that demons can only travel in straight lines. And if you couldn't sleep, well, then there'd never be any reason to stop. This occurs to me sometimes when I'm really enthusiastic about a project -- writing or painting -- that if only I didn't have to go to sleep, I could just keep going. I could pursue a thread until I found its very end.

And if I did that? Who knows what kind of demon I'd become. All sense of balance would go out the window. I would follow my obsession until I had become a grotesque parody of it's humble, mild-mannered origins.

If no one slept, we'd all be carried along by our passions without break, becoming more and more like whatever will-o'-the-wisp we're chasing. People would be just like themselves -- only more so. Frightening, right? Only divinely-imposed distraction saves us.

So, see? It's a very good thing that we go to sleep. Someone must be looking out for us.

the end of the world - revisited

2005-11-16T01:32:00.000-08:00

Back in high school it was still possible to think about all the ways the world might end. With my whole life ahead, there was no reason not to hope that we could save the world in my lifetime. The future was so far away.

Now life is shorter. If I'm already halfway through, it's much harder to imagine that anything is going to profoundly change for the better.

It's been a long time since I've really thought about all the ways the world is falling apart, all at once. It's more manageable to think about them one at a time, and usually not head on -- just noting them out of the corner of my mind's eye... But now -- at the risk of sounding naive -- let's review:

1. Nuclear bombs. It's not the Russians in the scare scenario anymore -- it's terrorists, or India and Pakistan, or even China who'll loose the missiles.

2. Running out of energy. With gas prices so high, the prospect of simply running out of natural energy resources is seeming more plausible than usual. Apparently there's been a meme going around the net, someone walking through exactly how society would begin to break down without means for transportation and heat...

3. Extinction of species. I've heard that among zoologists there's a phrase, "documenting the decline". The thing that freaks me more than losing the gorillas, though, is the killer seaweed that's taking over on the sea beds. (Wish I could recall what it's called...)

4. Killer germs. This one's new during my lifetime. AIDS freaked everyone out. Then there was mad cow disease... Folks are talking seriously now about a pandemic of bird flu... Who knows what kind of super-plague will hit, traveling globally due to airplanes...

I suppose those are the real "end of life as we know it" scenarios. But, of course, there are a few other "very, very bad" trends that probably ought to be added:

5. Climate change. We've got the hole in the ozone. The ice caps are melting in freakish ways. I don't think I've heard anyone directly attribute Hurricane Katrina to global warming, but one has to suspect...

6. Genetically Modified Organisms (GMOs). I include this in the big list of scare because it's on everyone's radar, but it's probably the least tangible thing on this list. There's the story about the butterflies that couldn't cope with genetically modified corn, and Monsanto's copyrighting rice in India, and tomatoes being spliced with fish genes. Creepy -- but not a deadly threat. Yet.

7. Pollution. Less discussed than it was in the 70s... But now companies are buying and selling the right to pollute, which is freaky. There are stories about human fertility going down world-wide because of sex hormone mimics that have made it into the environment. There's caffeine in the fish in the Willamette because we pee our Starbucks lattes there. All of us have vinyl and 70 other odd chemicals in our bloodstreams...

In a way, the previous seven issues have all been about the environment -- ways to make the world around us unlivable. Let's throw in a few social issues now. Not the "end of the world", but rather "dystopia" scenarios.

8. Corporate domination. The corporations exist to earn profit, and do so at the expense of honest accounting, environmental safety, honesty about pensions, fair labor practices, et cetera et cetera. It's not the fault of anyone involved: corporations are a logic that inexorably plays out. It is in their nature to try to buy the government, and to essentially become small nations unto themselves.

9. Authoritarian government. Government is organized crime. It exists to hold a monopoly on violence. Domestically, it exerts control via the police. Internationally, via the military. It is in the nature of government to want to increase control -- to have surveillance over its own citizens, and to use economics to subjugate other nations, or war and torture if that option isn't available.

10. Ethnic conflict. Ah, but it's not as if it's simply the government vs. the people. The people are against the people, too. We've just seen two weeks of rioting in France, largely due to a history of racial privilege. The Right wants to crack down, the Left wants to create social programs to deal with joblessness, etc. The squeaky wheel is getting some oil -- but the violence will be remembered for generations. The ethnic tensions could lead to a Yugoslavia situation -- ethnic cleansing. Or maybe there'll just be race riots every ten or so years, like in the U.S. Once bad blood exists between groups, is there really any way to wash away the stain? Is the Israel-Palestine conflict a model for the rest of the world? --Limited land, but infinite cycles of grief and revenge?

Ten is a good number to end at. Those are the big global issues to worry over. I could add (11) hunger and poverty -- but that's so much a function of 8, 9, and 10 playing out. I could add (12) police brutality and (13) domestic violence, but there's a way in which these are also just examples of authoritarian government and (a type of ) ethnic conflict. Perhaps I ought to add (14) drug abuse -- that's a burden on society that is relatively new to the past hundred years, that's grown out of control. (15) Militarism might be worth mentioning -- since the "military industrial complex" is its own logic, playing out. Same story with (16) the prison industrial complex.

Why bother writing all of this? Hard to say. Just the urge to look at it face on once in a while, I guess. Sing along with me y'all: "These are a few of my least favorite things..."

OK -- back to life now. Cheer up... We've got Joss Whedon and Neil Gaiman and art blogs. The vegetarian options are better than ever before. Globally, slavery is less accepted than it was 200 years ago. In the U.S., subjugation of women and African-Americans is no longer generally accepted. And Bush's popularity has been hitting all-time lows...

a long, dark, cold night ahead

2005-11-09T23:25:00.000-08:00

Feeling very glum. Just watched a Frontline documentary called "the last abortion clinic". It very clearly brings it home that we're losing. And with a big Supreme Court case due on Nov. 30 that could change the whole landscape, it's very possible that we've just lost any real chance for progress for the next 30 years.

The Woodie Guthrie story about the rabbits being chased into a warren keeps going through my head. What do you do? Go underground, and wait til you outnumber them. [note: scroll down to the anecdote below "jesus christ".]

Part of me wants to sell the whole DVD collection, give up on buying a house -- put all my money into defeating the bastards. I feel like I've been put into a stupor, enjoying fantasies on TV... Now DVDs. Or on Google. Or making my own movies. None of these things connect to reality. I want to throw away all my pockets of fantasy. Give all this wealth to organizations fighting the good fight. Or at least come up with a donation plan where I'm giving significant monthly donations to NARAL and NGLTF, etc.

The poem "apolitical intellectuals" comes to mind. ...Yet, I feel like our side is in desperate need, that we must clarify our principles. We're on the defensive, not offering up a better vision than the opponents. Spin, spin, spin -- it feels like both sides' mouths are full of opinion-polled lies.

I know whose side I stand on, but I don't know who's saying the words that speak to my heart. Maybe what I do, writing, can ultimately help bring the spirit back. It's worth fighting the good fight -- we need to be able to say why it's good.

34 Skidoo

2005-11-01T18:22:00.000-08:00

32 was "32 Footsteps" by TMBG. 33 was "I Palindrome I". 34 is "34 Skidoo" by the Bill Evans Trio, compliments of G & the iTunes store.

Mellow day here. The traditional reading of "On The Day You Were Born" by Debra Frasier. A special Eggs Benedict & red potatoes breakfast. From G: a hand-calligraphed card and the Rustboy book. Lounging on the couch relaxing and reading. A quick jaunt over to the studio to vacuum up my strewn styrofoam greeblies before Artist's Way tonight. A surprise for G: I framed a picture of Amelia for Day of the Dead and put it in the laundryroom as a memorial. Cake -- "molten chocolate" from William Sonoma (another G gift), served in little ramekins with Hagen daaz.

Gifts: A card and check from Grannie & Grampa. From mom, a glass globe and a book on oxymorons. From Shield -- objectively the most adept gift-giver of all time -- Jelly Babies (ala Doctor Who) and the ORIGINAL three Astounding Stories magazines that "At the Mountains of Madness" appeared in...

...In 1936. Eighty years ago. WOW. [And so it simply kills me that I managed to add a small nick to one of them, despite being ever so careful while opening.]

A phone call from Grannie & Grampa after dinner. Mom called before we were up this morning, left a message -- calling from Oaxaca! Tonight I'm going out with J -- to Rimsky Korsakoffee's, or something similar.

I ordered some DVDs from Amazon last week -- and, as I'd hoped, they synchronistically arrived today. Not that they're meant as presents, but it's nice anyway. The extra-special pick of the litter: The Tomorrow People, which I remember watching on Nickelodeon a billion years ago. After we're done with Dark Angel, that's next in the queue. To be followed, I imagine, by Battlestar Galactica season 1.

34 is such a non-descript number. 35 is a bit scarier. I think my mental shift from here on out will be to begin referring to myself thus: "Well, I'm a strapping young man..." This, you see, rather than continuing to playfully say "I'm an old man..." I think it will keep my head in a better place as I work my way towards 70, 80, 90. Evolving into a lively, wrinkled, ageless Shakespearian Fool won't happen on its own, y'know?

looking a gift economy in the mouth

2005-10-28T13:28:00.000-07:00

I've been hearing a quiet buzz for a while about the notion of a "gift economy". Hard to pin down where I've been hearing it, but I can testify that DJ Spooky mentioned it briefly at his TBA Fest lecture. "Gift economy" is a term that is most strongly coming out of the Burning Man subculture. It resonates with the anti-corporation vibe that hit a high-water mark at the "battle in Seattle" WTO protests a few years back, a vibe that continues to reverberate in a fairly omnipresent way among those of the Left, in all their flavors.

"Gift economy" sounds good -- instead of greedily seeking profit, just give stuff away. It's got an appeal to anyone with lingering sympathies for Communist and Hippie ideas. But here's the thing: Burning Man is also premised upon radical independence. Everyone has to lay down some serious cash in order to buy their survival equipment and their way through the door. This has been much commented upon already...

...Here's the new idea that occurred to me a few nights ago: gift economy minus radical independence equals bribery economy. If everyone doesn't already have what they need, then gifting becomes the only means to purchasing basic needs. Install the gift economy on a society-wide basis, and that adds up to encouraging corruption. Instead of fee-for-service, you have to sweet-talk your way to where you want to go. No thanks.

I'm all for the notion of creating a surplus above what you need for survival, and then giving it away freely, rather than pursuing profit for no good reason. But let's be careful to keep the "gift economy" concept constrained -- it doesn't belong everywhere.

new motto

2005-10-23T23:07:00.000-07:00

If you can't be good -- be prolific.

bee whisperer

2005-10-18T17:19:00.000-07:00

When Maddy was eight, she swallowed a bee while riding her blue bicycle down the sidewalk by her grandparents' house. It didn't sting, but she could feel its little bee paws whereever it moved, as it explored around inside her lungs. She would point to where the bee was, just below her lowest left rib, but her parents didn't believe her.

The bee stayed inside her for two days. Then, when she was asleep, it flew out in a long snore, and returned to its bee friends. A little at a time, more each night, the bees followed it back to Maddy, until they had moved their entire community into Maddy's lungs. Each morning she would tell her parents that she was more full of bees than the last -- but it seemed too improbable to be true. Her avioli, the inner recesses of of her lungs, were shaped into tiny hexagons, each full of honey; and each side of her chest became an entire bee hive.

After the initial panic, Maddy began to get used to the bees. They would only go out at night; and when Maddy awoke in the morning she would have the flavors of exotic night-blooming flowers on her tongue. Her parents thought the bees that Maddy talked about were an unusual sort of imaginary friend, and decided that the best course of action would be to let her grow out of this fixation on her own.

When Maddy was nine, there were so many bees in her that when she opened her mouth, their singing would rush out with her words, so that it sounded like she was speaking through a kazoo. Her teachers thought that this was some sort of speech impediment, and quietly instructed the other children not to make fun of her. She explained her situation to selected friendsl; but though none were cruel, they all seemed to find reasons to avoid her after she did -- so she learned to stopped telling at all. She wasn't lonely though; she felt full of warmth. She had the bees.

Then one day, when it was Maddy's turn to clap the erasers, an amazing thing happened. The chalk dust tickled her nose, and she sneezed an enormous sneeze. The bees all flew out into the room, frightening the class and causing the teacher to shout. The insects swarmed about in confusion. Then, before their eyes, Maddy opened her mouth back up, and all the bees flew back in, a long string of furry black and yellow wings disappearing into her throat. In one long, grinning gulp, they were gone. "I told you so," Maddy said in her kazoo voice.

For the rest of the semester, Maddy the crazy bee-girl enjoyed a newfound respect from her classmates. Born partly from fearful fascination, partly from the desire to associate with the girl with superhuman powers, Maddy always seemed to have a few people around her, hanging on her every word. She was the bee queen.

As Maddy got older, the story about the day the bees flew out was regarded as a bald-faced lie by the years of students who followed. She went to college and got a degree in entimology. As an adult, her peers have always been far too polite to inquire about her unusual voice. She is currently alone, researching a little known species of bees in the Amazon basin that grow to the size of pigeons. Quite happily, actually.

Go to MirrorMask. Now. ...NOW!

2005-10-14T23:00:00.000-07:00

This is the worst thing I can say about MirrorMask: It's not perfect. Its pacing is a little off sometimes.

Now can I go back to talking about how good it is? It has a unique visual style, and excellent writing. You don't know what's going to happen next. It's beautiful.

It's playing at the Fox Tower theater (which was sold out). ...Now go! Go this weekend -- and then go again, because there's so much to see. I want to see it again... And we all WANT Neil Gaiman and Dave McKean to make more movies. You're going to own this on DVD eventually. If you have kids, then you're eventually going to buy it to give to them. You will talk about "Labyrinth" and "The Dark Crystal" and "MirrorMask" in the same breath (MirrorMask is probably the best of the three). And -- you can quote me on this:

Better Than "Serenity".

(Though not as much the thrill ride.)

OK, now that I've over-hyped it, and your expectations are way, way too high -- will you still please go?

happy birthday Confessor!

2005-10-10T22:54:00.000-07:00

Today my laptop turns two years old! "Confessor" was named after a dream that G had. Since I use this machine primarily for writing essays, it seems like a nice fit.

Another bit of elegance and poetry: G fiddled around in UNIX for me, so that now when I want to do back-ups, the command I type in is "confess". Ah, I'm tickled.

whack whack whackity whack

2005-10-06T00:05:00.000-07:00

whack whack whackity whack
put those pages in a big fat stack

whack whack whackity wide
wrote all day and my brain is fried

...Sixteen pages today. Twelve toward an essay on the "Youth Power" flavor of YL, four responding to a blog post by Alex Koroknay-Palicz in which he responds to me: Sven Sizes Up Youth Liberation Groups; I Declare NYRA to Kick-Ass.

it's here!

2005-09-26T23:58:00.000-07:00

The book I created via lulu.com arrived in the mail today!

spam this poem

2005-09-18T12:18:00.000-07:00

==============================

life is like...
------------------------------

life is like
skydiving
without a parachute

dropping out of infinity

in the beginning
the world is beautiful and wide
too big to behold

then the realization
all too quickly
how little time is left

options are shrinking

and the fall ends
abruptly

stopped by
the sickeningly mundane
particularity of

one place
in the ground

September 18, 2005

==============================

Life is SHORT. Be KIND to the people you love. Stick FORKS in the people you hate. Stop and smell the PUPPIES.

UNIX is hot

2005-09-11T16:38:00.000-07:00

I have a burning curiosity about UNIX, and have just begun tip-toeing through some online tutorials.

This started with me creating an off-site, password protected directory where I could back-up my essays from the past ten years. I've been living in happy gumdrop Mac land all this time, so my file-naming protocols have been... crappy. It looks like I managed to name some of my files with executable commands, which fudged up the whole matter.

Better than nothing, even so.

Then, last night was our household rsync night... I was using Confessor at the time, so G told me to open up Terminal and type "./.con [tab] [return]". Voila: Confessor is backed up! This lead to my first intro to UNIX... What does "dot" mean? What does "slash" mean? G took me up to "ls", "man", "rm", and "mv".

What's immediately obvious is the elegance of a minimum-keystroke language, and the nigh mathematical precision of how the architecture has been designed. Being a structural thinker, I gotta say: yum!

Really all I need is to learn the naming protocols of UNIX. But wow, this is juicy like reading a geometry textbook. (Which is to say, joo-say.)