Irate Weirdos

Max: X-treme Sidecar

2009-06-26T16:13:00.001-07:00

Max: Stoned Wallabies Make Crop Circles

2009-06-25T10:13:00.000-07:00

Best headline ever.

Australian wallabies are eating opium poppies and creating crop circles as they hop around "as high as a kite", a government official has said.
Lara Giddings, the attorney general for the island state of Tasmania, said the kangaroo-like marsupials were getting into poppy fields grown for medicine.
She was reporting to a parliamentary hearing on security for poppy crops.

More at the Beeb.

Jericho: The Problem is David

2009-06-24T16:25:00.000-07:00

Go have a look at this article from CNN.

Now, anyone who has read this blog for a while knows I am a fan and supporter of advanced scientific research, space travel, NASA and the effort to privatize space. So, when Buzz Aldrin puts up an opinion on CNN that echoes my own feelings, I feel buoyed! Going back to the Moon has its place. But, in truth, I think striving for Mars is a better use of public funds. Let the growing nations compete with private American corporations for the Moon. NASA has already been to the Moon. NASA should be breaking new ground, exploring new territory. NASA should aim for Mars.

However, in the comments, I find this:

David
updated Tue June 23, 2009

Go to Mars? Why bother? What's the point?

The moonlanding was just a feather in the US's cap, it was a fun goal to get the country fired up over. But when it's said and done what did we get out of it? Bragging rights, nothing but bragging rights.

Why not put our time, money and effort toward something that matters like curing cancer, or ending world hunger, or bringing about world peace?

Wow.

They say if one does not study history, one is doomed to repeat it. I say, if one does not study history, one is doomed to leave ignorant comments on the Internet!

That's the one and only shot I'm going to take at David. I'd like to stand on my chair and call him a few choice names, but, that would accomplish nothing and, frankly, I think I understand David and people like him. I'll bet David is younger than I am. I'll give David some marks for intelligence - his comment is well written with not too many grammatical errors. And, David is a good-hearted liberal - he wants to deal with immediate social issues directly. I think I'm starting to like David.

However, David has no grasp of the past. None. If David thinks the Space Race was a "fun goal" - he hasn't cracked a history book. David, allow me bring you and your generation up to speed. You've heard the term "Space Race", you have likely heard the term "Cold War". Both of these terms get batted around a lot, but, in truth, the Space Race was just another arm of the Cold War. And, the Cold War was indeed a WAR. Sure, there were no Russian tanks in France or bombs falling on Moscow, but it was a war. Brave men and women died fighting that war every day. The Apollo astronauts that died on the pad should have been treated as war heroes, because that's what they were in every definition of the term. The Davids of the modern world didn't build bomb shelters in their back yards, wondering if they would ever need to use them. They didn't have bomb drills, huddled in the basements of their schools and churches hoping to God that they would never have to do this for real. (I huddled. I cried. I prayed.) The Cold War held the two largest countries on the planet in mortal fear of the other.

You have to start with Sputnik. The Russians put the first artificial satellite in orbit. That seemingly useless metal ball that went "beep-beep-beep" represented a new front in the Cold War. If the Russians could put a ball into orbit, they could put a bomb into orbit, they could weaponize space and then no one was safe. There is more than one account of people sitting in their living rooms, listening to the "beep-beep-beep" on the radio and looking at the ceiling like the bombs were going to start falling right at that moment. People were scared, and, maybe, rightly so. The Russians were aggressive and they beat the Americans to the punch.

The race was on. The Russians were the first to put a man in orbit. That changed everything. The Americans lagged behind every step and people were getting more frightened by the moment. The Cuban Missile Crisis didn't make anything easier.

It could be argued that Kennedy set up the race for the Moon as "bread and circuses" politics with NASA in the center ring of the biggest circus of them all. But, I think the only ones that could think that are people who have the comfortable distance of time from the events of those days or those who live in the valley of ignorance. You see, the Moon was indeed a goal that would get people fired up. And that was the point. If people wanted to reach the Moon, they would spend money and take risks and do what it took to get there. A lot of research would be needed. New solutions to new problems would have to be found. And not just one solution, getting to the Moon wasn't just one puzzle. Thousands of problems would require thousands of solutions.

And that's the trick. People were scared of the Russians. They wanted to defeat them, to break them, to leave them behind us technologically. Thus, they were willing to spend gobs of money to achieve this goal, spending money on what amounted to pure research. And they did - solutions were found, thousands of them. But, those solutions, like any solution, didn't just apply to getting people to the Moon. No, those answers were answers to questions in many fields. The Apollo program advanced materials science, communications, health, earth sciences, etc., etc. Buzz was right, the computer on board the Apollo missions had less computing power that a modern calculator. Your cell phone has more power than the entire Apollo program vehicles combined. But, those computers didn't exist before Mercury and Apollo. If they had to take one of the earlier computers with them, the size and weight would have made it impossible. The work that went just into the computers that were used was probably worth the whole program and leads directly to the computer that you are reading this blog on right now. Hundreds of other inventions from digital readouts (like on your alarm clock) to Lycra (read the label on a bra!) all had to be created to get man into space and on the Moon.

The Mercury and Apollo programs were worth every penny. They advanced technology untold amounts. They also gave us something that maybe we were missing: a sense of adventure and hope for the future.

Now, it's obvious that David's hold on the past isn't too good. His grasp of the future is shaky as well. Allow me to point the way.

David asked what is the point of going to Mars? As Buzz said, it is a goal just beyond our grasp. They canceled the Apollo program due to lack of interest. The American people caught David-itis and began asking what's the point? We beat the Russians - why are we still doing this? The big picture eluded them and the politicians of the era went with the whim of the people when they should have had the balls to lead them to better things. The Davids won the day and lost their souls in the process. NASA talked at the time of going to Mars, and, in this writer's humble opinion, considering Wernher Von Braun was at the helm, I think they could have gone and done it and we'd be that much further ahead.

So, I ask that you keep the Apollo program in mind and ask the question again: Why go to Mars? I'm sure the answer is now obvious. Since it isn't easy to go to Mars, it will require a lot of research to get there. And, yes, that translates into a lot of dollars (it also translates into a lot of jobs, but, who needs those, right?) Since it will require a great deal of research to get to Mars, a great deal of problems will get solved. Those solutions will apply to many fields, not just space travel.

The modern Mars program will have a disadvantage that a Mars program in the 70s wouldn't have had: Public Relations. The public (as represented by David) and the media have long been critical of NASA and space programs in general. Either the programs were not grand enough when compared to Apollo (this being the result of funding cuts by Congress) or a mistake had been made that caused an error (often as the result of funding cuts by Congress) - NASA has been the butt of Tonight Show jokes for the last three decades.

Then, we lose seven astronauts in a tragic explosion that is replayed a billion times by the media and plastered on every newspaper for a month. So, instead of getting right back on the horse, NASA is forced to take nearly a decade to design a better O ring!

Public opinion is driving NASA to face their ultimate nemesis; Perfection. In the 70s, as we see in Mr. Aldrin's tale on the Moon landing, there was room for error. NASA didn't have to have everything 100% with no chance for error before even one tile was glued into place. So, now, not only will the program have to solve the issues of getting to Mars, they will have to do it perfectly. That will require many more solutions.

So, just maybe, those solutions will apply to curing diseases such as cancer. And, if you can grow food on Mars, you can grow it anywhere. Solving a problem for Mars, any problem, will solve it for Earth. (And, just for David, cancer is being cured. Many companies are working on it. There is money to be made, so research is happening. Many more people are surviving cancer than ever before. Oh, and world hunger would be easy to solve. The problem there is politics. You can't cure politics.)

So, in conclusion, I say: Let's go to Mars.

We can send David first!

(A little education from Wernher Von Braun, Disney and the Cold War!)

Max: Stephen King Killed John Lennon

2009-06-22T15:24:00.001-07:00

Max:What Happens if You Feed a Dog Chocolate While he Wears a Tin Foil Hat in the Microwave

2009-06-19T14:34:00.000-07:00

Max: Old Jews Telling Jokes - Schmuck

2009-06-18T11:21:00.000-07:00

Max: Geek Voodoo

2009-06-18T10:56:00.001-07:00

I actually managed to bring my lappy's optical drive back to life. Just as I was unduly depressed yesterday, I am now unduly proud of my 1337 $|<i11z.

Max: Back To The Dark Ages

2009-06-17T17:30:00.001-07:00

The DVD drive on my computer is dead. I wish I could convey how much this sucks. I've never had the bleeding edge, super-shiny technology I dream of. But I've managed to at least stay within a few parsecs of that lovely bleeding edge. Now, my main -- only, really -- computer has no optical drive. It functions other than that -- for now. At the moment I can arguably live without accessing CD's and DVD's on my computer. But the next time I find myself in need of a clean install, I'll be fucked.

Given that I'm too broke to afford penny candy, it's going to be a while, if ever, before I can afford a replacement. Assuming everything else on the computer holds up, it may have a year or so of decent performance, followed by a steady slide toward brickdom. Unless my financial situation improves, once my lappy is bricked I will be a geek without a computer.

Edit: Yes I am being excessively dramatic.

Max: The World Needs More Teachers Like This

2009-06-12T16:42:00.000-07:00

Max: Futurama Even More Back Than Before

2009-06-12T14:32:00.000-07:00

In another case of an animated primetime series resurrected from the dead, 20th Century Fox TV plans to produce 26 new episodes of "Futurama." Comedy Central will begin airing the new episodes in mid-2010. Voice actors Billy West (who played Philip Fry), Katey Sagal (Leela) and John DiMaggio (Bender) have all signed on to return.

More at Variety.

Thanks to Hijinks Ensue for the good news.

Max: Manah Manah

2009-06-08T15:17:00.001-07:00

Max: Jazz Funk Boosh

2009-06-01T16:17:00.001-07:00

Watch The Hitcher in Entertainment | View More Free Videos Online at Veoh.com

Max: More Boosh

2009-06-01T15:54:00.001-07:00

Naboo and Bollo know how to go out.

Max: Ice Flow Nowhere To Go

2009-06-01T12:10:00.001-07:00

Max: Spaghetti 'oops

2009-06-01T11:46:00.000-07:00

I love The Mighty Boosh.

Max: A Little Light Lituus Music

2009-06-01T11:36:00.000-07:00

Cutting-edge computer modelling software has enabled a long-lost, trumpet-like instrument to be recreated – allowing a work by Bach to be performed as the composer may have intended for the first time in nearly 300 years.

The software was originally developed by a University of Edinburgh PhD student, funded by the Engineering and Physical Sciences Research Council (EPSRC), with the aim of optimising the design of modern brass instruments.

Computer modelling is an emerging technology in instrument manufacture, but the new software offers unprecedented accuracy in terms of ensuring a brass instrument’s design delivers the required shape, pitch and tone.

More here.

Jericho: Headed for an ear-rrr ache!!!

2009-05-30T22:22:00.000-07:00

This post is just me whining! You've been warned!

This week has been goofy. Two of my friends asked me to watch their pets while they were out of town. So, twice a day, I've been heading over to their place, hanging out for two or three hours at a time (isn't unemployment fun!) coming home and doing it again a few hours later - all so their neurotic dog doesn't whiz on the furniture or commit suicide or something.

Now, as my reward, they have a HUGE TV, great sound system and like every cable channel they can afford! (Not to mention an XBox!) I haven't had actual cable TV since I moved into this apartment, about a month ago. So, I got a Law & Order fix, some Military channel (Wings!) and some other good stuff.

Get your mind out of the gutter. They're married - what use would they have for THOSE channels???

Today I'm flipping channels and ran across something I wasn't aware existed. There is a station called VH1 Classic - I guess it's supposed to be Classic Rock - but all of their shows seem to be "Heavy Metal" themed. I say "themed" because three old guys in bowling shirts and Mettalic sweatshirts sitting around talking music trivia like some freaking sports show isn't very "Metal" to me. (It's called "That Metal Show" - wow, even the title is a yawn.)

The first show I saw this morning, about 8 AM was called "Metal Mania". Oh boy. My first clue should have been the graphics for the program - all Day-Glo pinks and greens - also not very "Metal". But, when the first song came on - I got the joke: Bon Jovi's "You Give Love a Bad Name" ... yeah. This wasn't Metal - it was Butt Rock! This was followed up by Kiss with no make-up, a couple of other pretty boy hair-farmers, and finally Kip Winger! (Thus the title of this post! You didn't think I was going to explain that, did ya?)

I couldn't look away. Every time a commercial came on the Military channel show I was watching about how the Japanese bombed Pearl Harbor, out of sheer morbid curiosity I flipped back to see what other poof was ... "Rocking" "Out" - /air quotes.

Finally, the 9 o'clock hour struck. They opened with Quiet Riot. Better - well, not really, but at least there wasn't any leather clad asses shaking or 1980's "I'm too sexy to shave with a sharp razor" stubble. (Fucking Kip Winger!) Next was Scorpions; "Rock You Like a Hurricane". If you thought music videos made no sense, the 1980's European music videos might as well have been filmed on the planet Vulcan - just a sexier Vulcan - with lots of icy-cold, sexy but wholly unattainable blond chicks all crying because you hurt them!

This was followed up with Queensryche. Undoubtedly metal - and they didn't play "Silent Lucidity"! They played the other hit off that album, the title track "Empire". A kick ass song if ever there was. Then Iron Maiden and I had to go when The Cult came on.

Lesson Learned: don't watch "Metal Mania" until after 9 AM!

Max: Steve Cohen (D-TN) Spanks Robert Mueller (Dumb-FBI)

2009-05-22T17:04:00.000-07:00

Max: Obama Goes Full On Bush

2009-05-22T15:05:00.000-07:00

I expected I would eventually be disappointed by the Obama administration. I just didn't expect it would be this badly.

Max: Rocket Scientists - Pythagoras (Unbound)

2009-05-21T17:31:00.000-07:00

Max: Rawk!

2009-05-21T16:51:00.001-07:00

Max: Daily Show Interview With The Newt

2009-05-20T14:42:00.000-07:00

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart

M - Th 11p / 10c

Newt Gingrich - UNCUT

thedailyshow.com

Daily Show
Full Episodes

Economic Crisis

Political Humor

Jericho: Holy Hoppin' Hares, Batman!

2009-05-18T16:43:00.000-07:00

More funny videos like the "Superheroes in Cincinnati" at Heavy.com

http://www.worldsuperheroregistry.com/

Ummmm .... I'm at a total loss. Excelsior!

Max: Father's Day Is A Comin'

2009-05-14T17:02:00.001-07:00

Father's Day is a mere month and a week away. I know everyone is highly keen to shower me with material goods. Even though I am not much of a materialist, I care enough to make it easy to schwag me up. In that spirit, below are my many wishlists.

Amazon.com
Books - Comp Sci/Math
Books - Biography/Essays
Books - Fiction
Books - Food
Books - Graphic Novels
Books - Japan
Books - Music
Books - Reference/Other
Books - Religion/Philosophy
Books - Sci/Tech
Books - Society/Gov
Books - Writing/English
Clothes
DVD - Movies
DVD - Music
DVD - TV
Gift Card
Kitchen
Magazine Subscriptions
Music
Toys and Tools

Guitar Center
Max's Bass Desires

Stew Mac
Making A Solidbody Electric Guitar

Luthier's Mercantile
Build an Electric Guitar, Robbie O’Brier DVD

Birdsong Basses
Hy-5 Bass

Max: Some Thoughts on Miss California

2009-05-14T11:51:00.000-07:00

1) Beauty pageants are retarded and the fact that the news has spent more time covering this shit than the many Bushlike policies coming out of the Obama Administration leaves me with a strong desire to move to an off grid cabin the the woods.

2) Last November, a majority of Californians voted for a law that not only banned gay marriage but may end up nullifying existing marriages. It seems Ms. Prejean is an ideal representative for them.