Computer Professionals for April Foolishness

tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-54320645619851595832009-06-22T13:48:50.957-07:00Computer Professionals for April FoolishnessA repository for April Fool publications and stories, past, present, and future. No Computer Professionals were harmed in the preparation of this blog. Compliance monitored by PETA.Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.comBlogger115125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-10031318464585339642009-04-06T19:25:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:29:00.311-07:00Sumsing Turbo 3000: The ultimate in convergence.

Mobile phone with many surprising built-in functions. Must be seen to be believed.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-23123451736579176172009-04-02T01:49:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:29:33.208-07:00WebCam spy feature for websites

Woopra, the world’s fastest growing Web Analytics provider, today announced that the next version of its wildly popular real-time Website monitoring application will allow users to remotely activate and view Website visitor’s built-in Webcams.The company’s chief scientist, Dr. Lirpa Sloof, said, “Woopra already provides the most robust, feature rich and easy to use Web analytics available. Today

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-49068975691353106122009-04-02T01:46:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:29:52.115-07:00PetBook K9

Playing fetch is so last year!

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-35727359869747281032009-04-02T01:42:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:30:09.082-07:00Microsoft asks feds for bailout

Microsoft requested on Tuesday some $20 billion in bailout funds from the federal government, claiming that as the company controlling an overwhelming share of the OS market, it is too big to fail. The company said low adoption rates for Windows Vista, the ensuing ad campaign trying to convince people that they really do like Vista, and the increased need for development resources to rush Windows

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-60486592072271139402009-04-02T01:39:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:30:30.867-07:00Apple patents method to enforce secrecy

The US Patent and Trademark office published an Apple patent filing on Wednesday that analysts are calling a bold attempt by the Cupertino Fruit Company to protect its core corporate values and business practices.Since the return of Steve Jobs to the consumer electronics giant and sometimes computer maker in 1997, Apple has become famous for its secrecy - so much so that many a journalist has

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-34609742504341690322009-04-02T01:37:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:30:50.624-07:00Taking the work out of responding to messages

As more and more everyday communication takes place over email, lots of people have complained about how hard it is to read and respond to every message. This is because they actually read and respond to all their messages.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-57717546641427777372009-04-02T01:30:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:31:11.958-07:00WolfPigeon: Wireless everywhere

Ubiquitous Digital NetworkingInterconnectivity has never been more important. Digital networks serve up more and more of our entertainment, information, and communication than ever. Indeed, our ability to easily connect with each other is the foundation of our daily lives.Qualcomm, with its newly developed convergence program, seeks to create the first truly ubiquitous digital network so that

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-5604974834223557602009-04-02T01:28:00.001-07:002009-04-06T19:31:39.059-07:00Warner Brothers acquires Pirate Bay

After years of hostility, lawsuits, police raids and heated invective between the two groups, the Pirate Bay has today announced they have settled their differences with US media conglomerate Warner Bros. The largest BitTorrent tracker has sold out to Hollywood and the two have agreed a deal.The deal, worth over $13 billion (10 billion euros) came about after the recent performance at the Pirate

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-6891841721775095542009-04-02T01:10:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:32:27.871-07:00Equal Parking for Women in Germany

Starting August, half of parking spaces in the inner cities will be reserved for women and designated with a special purple sticker on each car. Ministers will be coordinating the free give-away, today only, of the stickers in Munich & Regensburg. As well, the first 100,000 men have a chance to obtain a sticker as well.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-55802029689170744122009-04-02T01:06:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:32:05.107-07:00Pigeons to be used to directly target consumers

LONDON - The City's surplus pigeon population is to be tagged with GPS technology to launch a new media vehicle for clients wanting to target consumers directly outdoors.The initiative, developed by creative advertising agency Creative Orchestra, uses GPS technology to sync-up with users mobile phones.Using electromagnetism, the birds are able to navigate the location of their targets, using new

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-22020613075574080672009-04-02T01:04:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:32:50.990-07:00Cloud Computing Reaches for the Sky

Early this morning we launched a brand new cloud computing service. This revolutionary new technology will change the way you think about the cloud.For a while the cloud was simply a metaphor meaning "a bunch of computers somewhere else." Until now, somewhere else meant good old terra firma, the Earth itself. After extensive customer research we found that this rigid, antiquated way of thinking

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-4467720865056262792009-04-02T01:03:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:33:26.787-07:00The Guardian Goes Twitter

Consolidating its position at the cutting edge of new media technology, the Guardian today announces that it will become the first newspaper in the world to be published exclusively via Twitter, the sensationally popular social networking service that has transformed online communication.The move, described as "epochal" by media commentators, will see all Guardian content tailored to fit the

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-10606769309635931232009-04-02T00:56:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:33:53.912-07:00Expedia: Flights to Mars from only $99

That's right! Expedia has dropped all booking fees—including fees on flights to Mars. Right now you can save over $3 trillion on a Mars vacation—and in this economy, you can't afford NOT to go!Only on Expedia!

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-76361513781441396932009-04-02T00:52:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:34:18.934-07:00BMW Magnetic Tow Technology

For once, BMW is happy to be behind the competition.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-75898111926088705552009-04-02T00:48:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:34:46.481-07:00LOL code search

Google Code Search has a special syntax to search for lolcode only. Just use lang:lolcode when searching for something, and you’ll get lots of OM NOM NOM. The Google Code Search homepage is full of other lolcat-related examples.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-76506518700932704142009-04-02T00:44:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:35:13.242-07:00The gBall(BETA)

This weekend around the country, the gBall(BETA) will change Australian rules football as we know it.Building on our core strength in search, Google was approached by a number of Australian rules football leagues to apply our technology in their search for new talent. In response, Google, in partnership with the official supplier of matchballs to the AFL, Sherrin, has developed the gBall.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-17769159785910153962009-04-01T12:32:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:36:06.525-07:00Jeff Bezos announces Pay-per-view for Kindle 2

In a surprise announcement, on Wednesday April 1st, Jeff Bezos, Chairman and CEO of Amazon.com, personally contacted owners of the Kindle 2 e-book reader via Whispernet-o-gram, reportedly to offer them a special deal on Amazon's new Pay-Per-View service designed specifically for the newest Kindle reading device.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-20460978846074039952009-04-01T12:25:00.000-07:002009-04-06T19:35:39.825-07:00Cognitive Autoheuristic Distributed-Intelligence Entity

For several years now a small research group has been working on some challenging problems in the areas of neural networking, natural language and autonomous problem-solving. Last fall this group achieved a significant breakthrough: a powerful new technique for solving reinforcement learning problems, resulting in the first functional global-scale neuro-evolutionary learning cluster.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-16180103534109487202009-03-31T14:58:00.000-07:002009-03-31T15:03:45.461-07:00Paying in Ink

The German computer magazine c't reports in their issue of the week of April 1 that since ink jet ink is more expensive than silver, that you can pay small amounts by having your printer fill a page with black ink, and the printer producers will send the money they will get back from you when you refill on to whomever you wanted. The protocol is called PPP, Picopayment Protocol.It is such a crazy

Debora Weber-Wulffhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01602911135725939409noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-69246292575467834422008-06-06T16:11:00.000-07:002008-06-06T16:13:09.931-07:00Derrie-Air

Not published on April 1, but nonetheless a worthy contender.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-91432278314200706402008-04-03T10:22:00.000-07:002008-04-03T10:23:34.580-07:00Calling Carla: Brown enlists first lady to give Britain style

Carla Bruni-Sarkozy, the first lady of France, has been appointed by Gordon Brown to spearhead a government initiative aimed at injecting more style and glamour into British national life.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-3342965213307820462008-04-02T18:39:00.000-07:002008-04-03T00:55:56.115-07:00New color Kindle

In a surprise move that left Kindle owners speechless, Jeff Bezos, founder and CEO of Amazon.com, announced today that the new SuperKindle will be available only as a free upgrade for Kindle early adopters. Optional features include a dishwasher attachment and DVD player.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-37575732313480913372008-04-02T18:16:00.000-07:002008-04-02T18:19:10.666-07:00HandSolo™

Device-free state-of-the-art wireless technology in your hand.

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-79159167590146443272008-04-02T18:11:00.000-07:002008-04-02T18:13:06.303-07:00Naked Security News

Join the Club. Club membership has its perks!

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5432064561985159583.post-69659189111554664742008-04-02T18:09:00.000-07:002008-04-02T18:11:05.780-07:00A slap in the face for hackers and virus writers

SophosLabs is today announcing ground-breaking technology that detects hackers using facial recognition. By identifying and stopping the virus writer, we can stop malware from even being written, tested and released.Utilizing the webcams built into many modern computers, SophosLabs is able to produce a real-time forensic analysis of a PC user’s facial features to determine if they are exhibiting

Jim Horninghttp://www.blogger.com/profile/01813631663553781471noreply@blogger.com0