The Donut Shoppe

Dealing with the public

2007-09-03T17:03:00.000-07:00

Just for fun

2007-09-03T14:00:00.000-07:00

Police investigation

2007-08-28T00:15:00.000-07:00

Remember Me!

2007-08-27T09:55:00.000-07:00

A Deputy Sheriff was rushed to the hospital with an inflamed appendix. The doctors operated and advised him that all was well. However, the patrolman kept feeling something pulling at the hair in his crotch. Worried that it might be a second surgery the doctors hadn't told him about, he finally got enough energy to pull his hospital gown up enough so he could look at what was making him so uncomfortable. Taped firmly across his pubic hair were three wide strips of adhesive tape, the kind that takes everything with it when you pull it off. Written in large black letters across the tape was the sentence: "Get well quick..... from the nurse you gave a ticket to last week."

Cool police car

2007-07-17T14:43:00.000-07:00

Where's the windshield on this thing?

2007-07-07T05:37:00.000-07:00

Sad but true

2007-06-24T09:31:00.000-07:00

Poor little rich girl

2007-06-09T18:07:00.000-07:00

Police Stress

2007-06-08T19:34:00.001-07:00

Wal-Mart Shopping

2007-06-03T06:28:00.000-07:00

Two policewomen doing some shopping for shoes in Walmart after the hurricane. http://www.mentalfunk.com/movies/lootingpolicekatrina.html

Speed bump

2007-05-22T17:51:00.000-07:00

Awesome Italian Police Car

2007-04-29T17:16:00.000-07:00

(from Lamborghini Press Release) A Lamborghini Gallardo has been donated to the Italian State Police (Polizia di Stato) by Automobili Lamborghini SpA. The V10, 500 bhp 190 mph performance car has been liveried in the colours of the state police and includes a siren and flashing lights on the roof. This is the first time that a Lamborghini will be used by Italian police.The Gallardo police car will be used by the traffic police (Polizia Stradale) during emergency situations on the Salerno-Reggio Calabria highway in southern Italy. It is equipped with apparatus to transmit and receive information and images in critical situations such as road traffic accidents, fires and other disaster situations. It will also be fitted with the Italian police’s Provida system which records traffic violations and sends images in real-time, and has a direct connection to the police database as well as the Elsag ‘Autodetector’ system for number plate recognition. In addition, the Gallardo is equipped with first aid equipment including defibrillator apparatus with the capability to perform electrocardiograms, and automatic diagnosis of arterial pressure and the presence of oxygen and carbon dioxide in the blood. The car will also be used for the transportation of plasma and human organs for transplant. The police’s use of their Lamborghini Gallardo won’t be limited to fair-weather driving: as well as the benefits of the Gallardo’s permanent four-wheel drive, during winter months it will also sport special ‘Sottozero’ snow tyres developed by Pirelli for Lamborghini. More photos at: http://www.seriouswheels.com/cars/top-2004-Lamborghini-Gallardo-Italian-State-Police-Car.htm

Above and beyond the smell of duty

2007-04-26T04:08:00.000-07:00

Officer AH

2007-04-20T10:20:00.000-07:00

A motorcycle officer stops a man for running a red light. The guy is a real jerk and comes running back to the motor officer. The violator demands to know why he is being harassed by the Gestapo! So the officer calmly tells him of the red light violation. The "Motorist" instantly goes on a tirade, questioning the officer's ancestry, sexual orientation, etc., in rather explicit terms. The officer, being a professional, takes it all in stride. The tirade goes on without the cop saying anything. When he gets done with writing the citation he puts an "AH" in the lower right corner of the narrative portion of the citation. He then hands it to the "Violator" for his signature. The guy signs the cite angrily, tearing the paper, and when presented his copy points to the "AH" and demands to know what it stands for. The officer then removes his mirror sunglasses, gets in the middle of the guys face and says, "That's so when we go to court, I'll remember you're an Asshole!" Three months later they are in court. The "Violator" has such a bad record he is about to lose his license and has hired an attorney to represent him. On the stand the officer testifies to seeing the man run the red light. Under cross examination the defense attorney asks; Officer is this a reasonable facsimile of the citation you issued my client? The Officer responds, "Yes sir, this is the defendants copy, his signature and mine, same number at the top. Attorney: Officer, is there any particular marking or notation on this citation you don't normally make? Officer: Yes sir, in the lower right corner of the narrative there is an"AH , underlined. Attorney: What does the AH stand for, officer? Officer: "Aggressive and hostile, sir" Attorney: Aggressive and hostile?" Officer: "Yes Sir" Attorney: Officer...... Are you sure it doesn't stand for Asshole? Officer: Well sir, you know your client better than I do !

Choke the chicken

2007-04-11T19:07:00.000-07:00

Why did the chicken cross the road? L.A. Police Department: Give me ten minutes with the chicken and I'll find out.

Cops Gone Wild

2007-04-08T15:13:00.000-07:00

Cops in Kingston, Ontario stop and pose with some young girls gone wild.

Thinks that make you go hmmm!

2007-04-07T13:34:00.000-07:00

Why do they put a suicide watch on death row prisoners? Duh! Why would you care if a man you’re planning to kill anyway, kills himself? Does it spoil the fun?

I also think about the death row prisoner in Texas who, on the day before his execution, managed to take a drug overdose. They rushed him to a hospital, saved his life, then brought him back to prison and killed him. Apparently, just to piss him off I guess.

2007-04-05T18:30:00.000-07:00

My partner and I were just about to head out on night shift, when a little Chinese man came into the station and began asking for directions to the Trans-Canada Highway. The station duty officer wasn't having much luck explaining the way so I stepped up and said, "Why don't you just follow us? We're heading that way." We got into our police car and the man followed us down the street. We no sooner got to the first intersection than a call came over the air, "Officer needs assistance!" We took off like a shot, forgetting all about our guest. While flying down the street, red lights flashing, sirens wailing, careening around corners, going through red lights, we heard the call, "Unfounded... Everything is under control." That's when we remembered our little Chinese friend. I looked back and there he was, wrestling with the steering wheel, but right on our tail! We stopped, got out, and approached his car. Wide-eyed, he looked at us and said, "I almost rost you!"

Southern Hospitality

2007-04-04T04:09:00.000-07:00

Pint sized hecklers

2007-04-02T18:25:00.000-07:00

Do I look like I'm bluffing?

2007-03-31T17:59:00.000-07:00

The best bluff I remember was by the Officer who trained me. On Hilton Head there is a big public parking lot at the entrance to the public beach. We had received many complaints of teenagers playing loud music and drinking at night in the parking lot. This evening we received a report of a large crowd disturbing the peace. Upon our arrival we found about fifty people in the parking lot. We got out of the patrol car and my partner announced that everyone would have to leave because we had received complaints about the noise. The group had been drinking and they crowded around our car. They asked what we were going to do if they didn't leave. My partner calmly told them that we would put them in jail. They all started laughing and one wise guy said, "You don't really think you two can take us all to jail do you?" My partner reached into our patrol car and pulled out the riot 12 gage shotgun. He chambered a round and laid it on the hood of the car. He calmly stated, "Of course not. I don't plan to take all of you to jail... just those who are still standing when we run out of ammunition!" Everyone looked at my partner, then at me, then at everyone else and then they started leaving one by one, until we were alone.

Robocop

2007-03-31T06:33:00.000-07:00

The little mechanical canine is actually Laika, a Sony AIBO dog robot. He has a total of 20 degrees of freedom, 1 in the mouth, 3 in the neck, 4 in each leg, 1 in each ear and 2 in the tail. Additionally, his paws are passively compliant paws. Sensors include a color CCD camera, stereo microphones, joint encoders in the legs, touch sensors on the paws, and "petting" sensors on the head and its back. Laika will imitate the movements of a human/humanoid avatar.

Smile. Make a stupid face.

2007-03-29T03:18:00.000-07:00

Robin Williams talks about cops

2007-03-27T19:35:00.000-07:00

Police brutality

2007-03-27T02:23:00.000-07:00

"...so I grabbed the sauce-covered chicken leg from the guy's hands and I smacked him over the head with it. He'll think twice, next time, before dropping napkins on the ground." Sarge... you had to see the look on his face."