no sense of style

important message from myspace.com

2008-07-28T12:01:00.001-07:00

marissa laughing into her cell phone while reclining on an inflatable raft on her bed in a bikini sent me this very important message today:

Subject: hello!

Body:

Hiya there! Like fun rides???

I'm a regular here, but not my mother. I showed her around and she went all crazy on me� she really liked your ad page and insisted I contacted you on her behalf. She has never tried online dating You're lucky, because she's popular and is very attractive � she's single again, after being in a long term relationship for the past three years. She'd like to try new things and move on. She's looking for someone to date � no one night stands. She enjoys guys who are smart, romantic and generous. A little more info about her: She's in shape. She loves cooking, going to the movies and jogging. She has other pastimes; you can discuss them with her. I do NOT want to be part of that conversation. By the way, this is not her account, so please don..t reply directly to my message. Instead, send your reply to her E-mail address at husserx at yahoo.

Thank you!!! Happy hunting!

wow...where do i start? first, you're referring to your mother as a fun ride. you must have had a great time sliding out of her womb 14 years ago. you've got a great memory. but i'm sorry. she's obviously not the kind of popular i'm into if she doesn't even have a myspace page and still uses yahoo email (husser?? is that like a hussar?). mmhm. im sorry to hear that she broke up with your half-father/baby-daddy no. 3 recently. that's just heart breaking.. that's all for now. i'll leave the rest of my response to your imagination. (plus i have to do some work at work. what a concept!)

an update? what's that?

2008-07-25T15:57:00.001-07:00

today at work, a client threatened my life because i didn't receive emails from him for a month and he chose not to address it by calling me until now. what's that? if i didn't get your emails, how can i possibly know that i didn't get your emails? it was like something off of a jerky boys track. i loled on the inside and tried my best not to chuckle on the outside.
reading fear and loathing in las vegas, which feels like the suave vacation that i've never had and will never have. good. troya should read it. maybe i'll send it to him for his b-day in oct.
looking for somewhere to go for my birthday this year. the yen is falling against the dollar, so maybe japan? but i want to visit some people like troya and uma. yes? oder deutschland mit troya? wir können an den danube trinken oder skilaufen in der alpen? was denkst du?
i'm writing a short story(?) about a society full of apprehension and loneliness where people make love to lumps of plastic to obsession. whatcha think? don't steal my idea.

k bye.

party?

2008-02-23T20:00:00.001-08:00

i'm going to a party tonight with chris. i did some laundry, worked out, and played the ds zelda game (i skipped a bunch). i sold over $400 worth of video games and guides on amazon.com in the past two days. wtf kind of freak pays $150 for suikoden 1 and 2? those games sucked. i'm just glad i'm rid of them. anyway, i'm on a kaiser roll.

i got you beat, uma

2008-02-11T16:27:00.001-08:00

hiii

2008-02-02T23:19:00.001-08:00

i've been reading some...but not a lot. i finished malcolm by james purdy just now. i recommend it. i annotated it for uma in the city. when should i send it? next year? or during the year? birthday annotated book swap time? that could be fun.

everyone's out tonight except me. and i'm ok with that. i'm going to get some ice cream and watch turner classic movies like a depressed, fat, old oscar wilde if he were here today. then i'm going to go to jail for sodomy. too bad it's not illegal anymore. that's a pretty sexy and glamorous thing to get caught for. right, henry cowell?

how to make $ in stocks

2008-01-10T13:04:00.001-08:00

first, click here and sign up with zecco. if you do it through here, i'll get $50. i'll share it with you if you want. please and thank you.

why zecco?

1) it's cheap...4.50 per trade for stocks. don't trade mutual funds through there. don't get an IRA through there (transfer fees are low, but why have fees when you don't have to?). don't trade on margin. don't do options if you don't understand them. if you accumulate or start with $2,500, you get 10 free trades per month for whenever you have and hold that balance. that's a fucken good deal and i plan to take full advantage of it. transfer your money via ACH to avoid all fees. don't transfer money out until it says it has cleared (wait three days after you sell stock if you need to remove money from the account), otherwise, you'll get a high fee with interest. not hot.

2) omg it's like facebook for trading stocks. seriously...profile with pictures and a forum and communities. you can talk about whatever, but people tend to just talk about trading. it's so cute i could scream.

3) the logo is pink and i know how you just love gay things.

4) you need $0 to start. just put in whatever you were going to go play at the casino. you would have lost there anyway, let's face it. unless you're me.

then, after you've signed up and you're logged on, find me. my user name is nosenseofstyle just like this blog. aren't i clever? add me as your friend! because i am your friend. mmkay.

then, head over to my new blog which i will update. it's right here. i'm going to put all kinds of shit in here so you can make money with your money like i will. then i'll pay off my modest student loan amounts and my not-so-modest car amount that i owe. eek.

as for now, if you already have a stock account, my call is e*trade. god, i wish i had the money to buy it. i would have bought at $2.50. fucken ass... don't put too much in. there's talk that they could fold. but if they don't fold, you will end up making money because the stock really can't possibly go much lower. hee hee! poor baby. it dropped like your grandma over the past month or two.

(i'm'unna copy this to the new blog, fyi)

blogtv.com sign up NOW or die

2007-12-06T21:10:00.001-08:00

why am i obsessed with blogtv.com now? cuz this bitch be talkin bout how 'niggaz don't like that shit when all y'alls talk bout cho assholes an shit. y'all is some perverts!' and then a minute later, she says something like 'i'munna take a huge shit in your toilet.' she's fuckin brilliant. brilliant, ronald weasley!

la nuit

2007-12-05T23:49:00.001-08:00

went to ty's, had white russians
am drunk
am going to sleep gnite

updates

2007-12-01T00:06:00.001-08:00

here's what's been happening:

1) been losing every time i go to casino for the past two weeks-ish. what goes up must come down. luckily, it's not that much.
2) my gamestop stock has been on the rise. what goes down must come back up if it's about video games.
3) i've been reading lately. i finished discipline by paco ahlgren recently and it was surprisingly spectacular. in retrospect, the characters are a bit disproportional to the events that took place, but i enjoyed my time while reading it. my copy was signed by the author when i met him, so i'm going to shoot him an email with more to say about the book. it's his first book and he should be well-congratulated. really.
4) reading vacation by jeremy c. shipp now. now as in right now. i just put it down for a bit to type this. another first novel by an (hopefully) upcoming author. this guy's got style, but not much grace. in fact most of his writing is like a slap to the face. and i just want to get slapped harder and harder. make it hurt, bitch. jeremy contacted me on librarything.com and we commented back and forth and he asked his publisher to release a pdf copy of the novel to me so that i may review it. (no, i will not email you a copy....go buy one!! support the author!) so far, so great. this book is quirky and fun and SUCH a great idea i can't even tell you. there's all kinds of great allusions in here if you can catch them. the main character is a bit of a pessimist anti-hero, but not whiny or stupid, which is great.
5) getting a new computer at work. thank god because the one i use now is super slow. thank you, scott. (boss scott, not uma. but, sure, why not? thank you, too, uma.)
6) going to play roulette at 4am tonight/this morning. who's in?
7) it rained all day.
8) reese witherspoon, will you stop ruining your wedding dress running around in the rain like that??
9) it's still raining.
10) i took a 2½-hour nap when i got home from work today. it felt great, thanks for asking.
11) had lunch with rebecca in ireland. hello and welcome to delicious dish.
12) nini had the poo poo tea. LAA LAA CHA!
13) this guy

lohangrin

2007-11-24T22:25:00.001-08:00

you know, lindsay lohan movies have been playing a lot on tv lately. so, for the occasion i decided to download a nice recording of lohengrin. turns out lindsay and i have something in common when we listen to wagner.

2007-11-16T22:54:00.001-08:00

mmkay so i just won $3,000 at the casino. what should i buy?

stock picks

2007-10-19T17:49:00.001-07:00

omg look at this shit i'm totally gonna buy it

brsi

why am i gonna buy it? well, look at the website. they make parachutes for aircrafts. so basically, if you're in a plane and your pilot is incapacitated, the plane deploys a parachute and saves people's lives. my rationale: the private jet market is picking up and so people might want a parachute for the plane. why? because, as the website says, "It's not about the plane!" please let me know when/how that makes any sense because it doesn't. oh yeah and the main reason i'm going to buy it is because it's only $1.83 per share - so i'm going to buy like 10 shares instead of losing that money at the nickel slots this weekend. i'm such a loser ok fuck you.

i like this too:

gigm

there is no rationale behind it. i just like giga...like gigapet. i have no idea. i can't afford it anyway. who gives a

hey, what's new?

2007-10-09T23:06:00.001-07:00

one two three...

first off, i'm drunk, which gives me the opportunity to talk to all of you all across the internet, as if that has anything to do with anything, and i cooked dinner tonight for chris (and, of course, shared with jason because isn't sharing caring?) and watched love potion #9 and played the sandra bullock drinking game* for the first, what, 20 minutes(?), but then the scotch was too strong, we got the wrong one, curtis, but that's ok because there was pinot noir (isn't that the best there is, paul giamotti?), which was indeed and aforementionedly de.l.ici..o.u..s., where the fuck do you put the periods on that? i've been reading a lot lately, fantasy novels, realistic and unrealistic, things like stone of farewell by tad williams and the stone raft by josé saramago, but that shouldn't be such a surprise based on the sentence structure, and all this reading has gotten me really interested in learning about the way things work in other places, for example, how do you feel? right now? tell me, and did uma ever get the book i sent her? because if not, there's an ish, so anyway i just registered for this penpal site because i think it would be cool to have a penpal again. i mean, jasmin in new zealand is my first and best penpal, after all, she sent me a CD or two, which are great, but i want to make lots of penpals, and i want to have a bunch of physical letters because, honestly, i'm sorta tired of this internet myspace facebook assface spacebook bullfuckinshit. i want a document from you that i can hold where you describe your experience to me with whatever is going on because all these fucking internet sites are so not cutting it: they just skim the surface of the human experience, and so yes, that was a formal complaint, you have it in e-writing.

hey, internet, i have something to tell you: several years ago there was this great thing called paper and people used to take pens to it, with ink, and they used to write shit - no, i'm not making this up, could i make this up?? - to each other and you know what, it was great, well, what the hell happened to that? anyhow, i'm going to go back to reading my book since i'm bored with human interaction thanks to the internet.

that's right. i don't care how cool you look over the internet; both you and i know you're a mess in person.

*for more info on the sandra bullock drinking game, shoot me an email, or better yet, write me a letter, i love snails.

7 days...

2007-10-02T17:34:00.001-07:00

...until blind willow, sleeping woman comes out in paperback.
but uma gets a present in the mail sooner than that.

watch this!

wheeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!@$&@#$&@&1

how to leave a job on the right foot...or the left foot.

2007-09-25T18:54:00.001-07:00

so let me tell you all about how i left my last job: i did the honorable thing and ducked out quietly, not disturbing anyone. that's the proper way, don't you know? to give background, i used to work for a big mutual fund company and now i work for a small business in qualified plan administration (which is much better now in just about every way possible - at least i think so). anyhoo, the big mutual fund company has certain policies in place that protect its employees from discrimination and also a policy that states that overtime is never required under any circumstances. in light of the fact that they were not following said policies, i drafted and sent this email (which has been slightly changed to protect the anonymity of the company) to the whole department just minutes before i left:

Meine Damen und Herrn,

For the past many months, each employee has been asked to provide "required" overtime. I do not know about others, but I know that[sic] when I came to this company, I signed a contract with a clause stating that as long as I am an hourly employee, I may provide overtime at a purely elective basis and will never be required to come in early nor cut my lunch short. The point was also stressed during initial training. Of course, the needs of the department change, and we can all appreciate and understand that. However, (company)'s policy about this has not changed.

Naturally, employees are recognized for going above and beyond, which is great. However, if one does not come in early or cut their lunch short, management looks down on them with the eyes of shame. [cheesy, yes, but again, i wrote this really fast!]

Employee Relations in HR is now aware that some associates are treated differently than others as a direct relationship to the amount of overtime they provide. This, as management should know by now, is a violation of (company)'s policy. So, as a result, employees may see some positive change in the next coming months in terms of this and other policies.

After all, according to a member of HR, "We are not factory workers."
The[sic] again, according to one employee, "Well, even factory workers get a full hour's lunch."

Auf Wiedersehen!

and from what i've heard, i'm now referred to as a disgruntled ex-employee! isn't that great? i've never been disgruntled before! how cool. but what's not so cool is the fact that the email is littered with fourth grade grammatical errors and stale imagery. ew..did i really write that? mkay, bye.

2007-09-18T23:43:00.001-07:00

oh yeah, and xanadu.
XXXXANADU!

cash corner

2007-09-18T23:41:00.001-07:00

let me esplain sumfing to you...

today we saw an upswing in the market of riddikulus proportions. why? because professor lupin had control? because the rate was lowered by .5%? probably, but who can tell? and does it even matter? the federal government is frantically trying to control the very out-of-control rate of inflation and protect the sector that means the most: the financials - that much is obvious. but it seems like everyone just turns the other cheek to what's really going on.

so, what's going on, mmatusz? we are now experiencing the downfall of the american dollar, and how's it feel to be on the inside this time, america? isn't it loverly? that's right. ever since nixon took the dollar off the gold standard, we've all waited for it's imminent crash. well, here it comes. put your money in something - anything - other than the american dollar....i hear gold is a good hedge against inflation. well, i's too poor for gold. but if you're rich, why wouldn't you have gold. some bling for your investment account! booya, grandma. wiki-wiki-wiki how. and what.

keep in mind, there are other options than domestic stocks. i like junk bonds, international and domestic. and i also like international stocks because they are so sexy and know how to seduce me on those late nights when i'm alone with myself. emerging markets bonds are so hot if you can get them cheap as your mom.

here's what i like until spring:
BEGBX
VWEHX
VTRIX
FNMIX
DIA
VGSTX
BGEIX
OIH
because you're worth it and because anything else is just imitation milk. carnation condensed milk?? are you fucking kidding me, carnation? you think that's breakfast!?!

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!?!!?!

two clowns down, one to go.

2007-09-06T23:25:00.001-07:00

Luciano Pavarotti (October 12, 1935 – September 6, 2007)

Tamara "Tammy" Faye Messner (March 7, 1942 – July 20, 2007)

(still alive...)

update

2007-08-28T13:51:00.001-07:00

let me bring you up to speed:

i renewed my series 6 and 63 licenses and creepy old guy said, 'well if you don't pass, you can always go for that hollywood modeling contract.' it's a backhanded comment. do i look like i'm stupid, and if so am i a pretty face? is my face even pretty? does six years of university amount to naught in the eyes of the general masses? (don't answer that - i already know what you're going to say.) and all because i got my hurra did!

did you see the lunar eclipse last night? me too.

ok back to workity.

bye.

gute idee

2007-07-29T21:46:00.001-07:00

a really good idea just fell into my head. hey, uma..want to go to southern california wine country for our birthdays? we can seduce really average looking ladies, drink pinot noir with snooty convo, and toast to the book that i haven't finished yet. and we'll fake a car accident in my new civic. whatcha think? plz let me know. ok bye.

hp7 without the spoilers (oh wikipedia, when will you learn?)

2007-07-22T21:29:00.001-07:00

i read the ending of hp7 and skimmed through the first 3/4 of the book before it was released
it was hard to read because it was that bunk-ass photo pdf file version so when i got the book i started all over again
i missed a whole lot so i'm glad that i did, but jesus...this shit sure drags on
chris was nice to me and came home really early yesterday morning with a copy of hp7 because he said he wanted me to have it to start reading so i don't have to wait for it in the mail
i wasn't even done with hp6 when the 7th came in the mail so i had to finish that (again) first
i'm more than halfway through it (again‽) and i just want it to end
yes, that was an interrobang just then
it seems like everyone has properly read it through by now except me؟
and that's an irony mark

golijov schmolijov

2007-07-14T18:59:00.001-07:00

simply cannot get over how incredibly beautiful golijov's setting of Dickinson's How Slow the Wind is on this disc. dawn upshaw's voice is like buttah - especially when she's singing in yiddish. ach, i'm all verklempt. oceana, the piece itself is not really that spectacular. i thought it was rather bland and formulaic. it works tho! don't get me wrong...it works very well, but i'm not so sure he accomplishes anywhere near his aim (it is stated in his linear notes that he's the "latin-american bach" in so many words...and nothing can be further than the truth). the music does not have the same tightness of bach's. he did not transform passion into geometry, like bach. instead, golijov's music is loose and improvisatory-feeling. the passion in his music is passion. there's a lot of pain, just like bach - that's about the only similarity i could find. golijov ≠ bach. in any way. and that's just fine because i love bach for being bach and like golijov for being golijov.

movies upon movies, take two

2007-07-14T15:55:00.001-07:00

saw transformers with chris last night. it was good - funnier than i thought it would be. what i didn't understand was why the bitch's juvvy record made a difference in that one scene. the kid has a car that transforms and he acts all distant from her for less than a scene because the section 7 guys mention her record. wtf? that was stupid. it was really stupid. it shouldn't have made the final cut.

finally saw paprika. it was great! go see it yesterday. i thought it was interesting how one of the characters that you never really see in the end is named 'osanai'. it gives the idea that we all have a poor perception of reality until we become adults. i think that's one of the main things that really got lost in translation. well, what can be done? plus, does stupid america give a shit about that? no - the screen was flashy and colorful, so it was great. right?

harry potter 5 was great, too. i want to see it again. i was very saddened by the number of lines ron had (4?) and wanted to see more of umbridge...that is, more scenes and more weight. she was too skinny, but the acting was really great. i wanted to see umbridge as a HUGE fat ass. it would have been much better that way.

if it matters to you, then it transformers, harry potter 5, paprika, umbridge is too skinny (sad face) to me.

amazon.com sexes me again

2007-07-10T23:50:00.001-07:00

tonight i watched dazed and confused with chris over dinner. did i mention that i'm a huge fan of parker posey? she cracks my shit up. i especially like her when she's yelling 'air raid!' at all the froshies. saves the day.

and why didn't you tell me that dusapin's new opera is out on dvd!? you ass face! well, that's ok. i forgive you because i just ordered it along with the new golijov cd that came out today. so i'm stocked up now.

and what else came out? yay!

nothin but hedonism, golijov, dawn upshaw, dusapin, french sex, parker posey, milla jovovich, and of course net

movie reviews

2007-07-08T20:35:00.001-07:00

like a proper harry potter fan, i have been re-watching the movies and re-reading the books for harry potter month (that's this month in case you haven't noticed. happy christmas!). and here's what i think of

movie 1 - this movie was so cute, even if it was the most snippysnap of them all. i remember that i burst out laughing at just about every line that hermione has. hilarious.

movie 2 - likewise with ron's lines. he just sucks! isn't he great? i can identify with him because everything i own is rubbish (minus my car and flutes, thank you).

movie 3 - my favorite. this shouldn't be called prisoner of azkaban, but instead 'hermione granger saves the day'. i love her so much when she socks malfoy in the fuckerface. booya grandma.

movie 4 - i liked it a lot more the third(??) time around. i was just finishing up re-reading the book when i saw this one again. i'm glad and sad that there were things missing from the movie - or done differently in the case of longbottom giving harry the gillyweed.

movie 5 - we'll have to see how it is, but i have a feeling i'll be disappointed. i'm re-reading book 5 now and i didn't like it the first time. so....hmm...

but i also watched some other movies.....

ゲド戦記 - being a huge fan of ursula k le guin, i was thrilled when i finally got my hands on this movie that i've been waiting to see for over a year. it won't be released commercially in the US because sci-fi channel holds the rights from that bunk-ass miniseries done a few years ago. remember that? anyway, the movie was, sadly, nothing like the book. at all. not even close. so that was very, very depressing. but it was a ghibli film. so, that was GREAT! but it wasn't directed by the miyazaki that counts. so that was sad. anyway, the film looks great, the animation is delicious, the story is alright. but what it really lacked was magic. it doesn't have the same magic that howl's moving castle or laputa or nausicaä or mononoke-hime or sen to chihiro has. i'm a little sad that two different visual media outlets have ruined ursula's fabulous work - but no matter. this story will always live best in its book form. after all, one cannot compare to le guin.

saw sicko today, thanks to travis, who posted a nice link to the movie. this movie made me sick and depressed and ashamed to live in america (so what else is new). so, i will leave the country. soon, i hope. anyway, great film. even if you're not a fan of michael moore - which i'm not entirely (but i'm not not a fan either) - if you have a soul, then you'll like this movie.

what it's really about is gedo senki, sicko, harry potter movies, hermione, studio ghibli, kaiser permanente sucks my asshole