Mama Seoul

Eating (Thankfully Something that is Actually Food)

2009-12-01T20:35:00.000-08:00

Lighting Up My Life

2009-11-28T01:11:00.000-08:00

The tree is up! Ian and Eva immediately started banging and throwing our ornaments around (the majority of which are Egyptian glass). Miraculously, none of them broke. However, Curt broke two ornaments while attempting to stop the kids from breaking them. We left the bottom 2 feet of the tree pretty bare and used some fleece blankets under the tree to give the ornaments a chance of survival.

Birthing is a Journey: A Woman Who Serves

2009-11-23T00:56:00.000-08:00

From the DONA website:

The word "doula" comes from the ancient Greek meaning "a woman who serves" and is now used to refer to a trained and experienced professional who provides continuous physical, emotional and informational support to the mother before, during and just after birth; or who provides emotional and practical support during the postpartum period.

I have been asked to serve a friend on her VBAC journey. She, herself, is a certified doula. She does not need me to give her information or resources about birth or VBAC or labor coping techniques. She has read and researched much more than I have. She has attended many births as a doula and has put many techniques in practical use. So why does she need a doula herself, and why me?

Support.

Every woman needs support in her pregnancy and birthing time. Her knowledge, goals and family situation may vary, but every woman needs support. In Amy's case, she has great knowledge and a supportive husband, but she has special circumstances since her first birth was by cesarean with an inverted-T incision. It can be difficult to find the right provider for a VBAC when you have a low, transverse incision, but an inverted T makes it even harder. The importance of creating a birth team, cannot be underestimated.

I am not a certified doula, but I did go to great lengths to birth Eva. I know what it is to wear the scarlet letter that a prior c-section represents to many doctors. I know what it is to believe that I can birth my baby even when it would be more convenient for everyone else involved (other than me and the baby) to submit to a major abdominal surgery. I know the courage it takes to prepare and to believe when most people around you don't understand, or worse yet, don't believe. I know how it feels to do everything you can and then surrender to the process.

So I will serve. I will listen. I will cheer. I will encourage. I will surrender to the process of her birth. I will trust that I will have the right words at the right time, the right touch at the right time and know when to just sit quietly in the corner and do nothing but be present.

I am honored to walk this road with her and for the next 9 months, I will serve in any way I can.

Sewing Project

2009-11-16T23:32:00.000-08:00

Though I have had some small sewing projects in school, I never really learned to sew. I can't cut or stitch a straight line and I am not mechanically inclined, so getting proper tension on the thread, threading the machine, winding the bobbin, all big obstacles to sewing. Before Ian was born, I made a crib skirt and quilt with the help of my mom and friend, Heather. My mom is much more precise about laying out the fabric correctly and pressing the seams. That paralyzed me even more.

I've had a simple pillowcase dress pattern for months that I have been unable to get myself to make for the reasons listed above. I think I am finally starting to realize that it doesn't matter if it is perfect, I just need to do it. The pattern is very forgiving as is the cotton fabric, so I am trying to just get it done. The pattern was a PDF so I got it printed and put together and then I cut it out. Now it is pinned together and ready to be stitched.

So the question is, how long will it take me to wind and load the bobbin, thread the machine and stitch?

What Does Daddy Do Every Sunday

2009-11-16T03:54:00.000-08:00

My yoga teacher training course is all day long, every Sunday. People have been asking me,"How is Curt doing? What does he do all day wit the kids?"

Well, every Sunday after they drop me off, they make pancakes. Then, the do a lot of this:

Standing and Scooting

2009-11-15T19:41:00.001-08:00

Standing:

Falling into the Splits:

Little Sister

2009-11-15T19:40:00.001-08:00

Yesterday Sex, Today Death

2009-11-12T05:24:00.001-08:00

So yesterday Ian hits us with,"I want to talk about sex," and today he picked Bambi off the shelf for me to read to him at storytime.

Ya know, the story about the little deer whose mother gets shot by the hunters. The book doesn't show Bambi's mom die, just tells you that it happened and on the next page Bambi appears with his father.

"What happened to Bambi's mother?"

"She died. The hunters shot her."

"Why did they do that? They shouldn't do that?"

"They wanted to eat her."

"You're not supposed to eat somebody's mom. I need to get in those pages and stop the bad guys from shooting her."

Think we might be going vegan. Until Curt makes ribs again.

First Sex Talk

2009-11-12T03:28:00.000-08:00

My son is 3 years old. Not almost 4, not even 3.5, he is 38 months old. Yesterday, while he was getting into the bath he said,"I want to talk about sex, Mommy."

"What?"

"Sex. Seeeexxxxx. Let's talk about sex."

Just then, my husband came home and I told him,"Ian wants to talk about sex."

Curt said,"We can talk about sex after your bath."

After his bath, Ian was jumping around in the livingroom,"I'm ready. Ready to talk about sex!"

So Curt says to him,"What do you think it is?"

Ian says,"I don't know."

Curt,"Where did you hear about it?"

Ian,"On the tv." (Darn those PSAs there is one that plays on AFN a lot that has kids sayingm"Mom, Dad talk to me about sex."

Curt,"Sex is something that adults do."

Ian,"Then I think I need to practice a lot." (probably said this because he had to practice going to the potty and putting on his clothes , etc)

Curt,"No, no, you don't need to practice until you are much older." (Oh boy, was Curt starting to sweat here).

Ian,"Can I eat these carrots?"

And so ends the first sex talk.

Another Moby Wrap Intervention Brought to You by Mama Seoul

2009-11-04T00:30:00.000-08:00

Yesterday, I ran into a mom of three who was trying to help her older child with his homework, keep a toddler from jumping off the stairs and other destruction and calm a fussy newborn baby. She was holding him, but he was still fussing. Unable to concentrate on helping her older son, she set the baby down in his carseat carrier. She was very frustrated and so was the baby. Since Ian was occupied and Eva was sleeping I offered to hold the baby. The mom said,"That would be really nice, but he is hard to soothe."

I picked him up and wrapped my sweater tightly around him, like he would be held if I had my wrap, and he calmed instantly. I held him for about 15 minutes before Eva woke up. The mom was amazed and a little embarrassed. She said,"You calmed him and I couldn't. I should have been able to do it."

And then, of course, I told her about Moby,"It's not magic, it's Moby."

I'm no "baby whisperer", but the right carrier can really help a fussy baby. Unfortunately, my own wrap is out on loan, but I sent her the contact information for Moby Wrap Korea. It is amazing how a good baby carrier will change your life for the better.

Coincidently, Eva was wearing her Moby hat yesterday (with a very cute knit outfit that was given to me by my friend Katy). Moby has hats, blankets and Baby Legs to match your Moby. Korea only has the hats and blankets right now, but perhaps the Baby Legs will come soon.

Halloween!

2009-11-02T15:59:00.000-08:00

Halloween 2009 started back in August when I decided not to be last minute about the costumes. I decided that Eva would be Cyndi Lauper and ordered the basis for her outfit. I tried to let Ian pick his costume but he kept going back and forth so I finally ordered a pirate costume sometime in September. Well, Eva's outfit was backordered and delayed and backordered. I think it has finally shipped, but it did not arrive on time. With the Passion for Birth seminar October 28-30, I was not prepared for Halloween.

Eva's costume had to be put together. She refused the wig I had (it was blonde, not colored so it didn't really fit for 80's Cyndi anyway), refused bracelets and refused makeup. So her costume ended up being somewhere between punk princess, senior cruisewear and vampire. Oh well, she is a baby.

It was raining on Saturday but did clear up between 6 and 8 so we were able to go Trick-or-Treating. I got a few pictures before the camera died. Then I shot some more with a friend's camera, but I don't have those pictures, yet. I got a few more with another camera at home. Next year, I need to make sure I have enough time for execution or just buy something premade . Ian had a lot of fun and did more houses than last year. Of course, last year we were able to get rid of most of his candy without him knowing. This year, he knows but we are rationing and I will still give out or throw away a lot of the candy.

My Girl Wants to Potty All the Time, Potty All the Time, Potty All the Ti-ime!

2009-10-26T00:00:00.000-07:00

I haven't changed a poopy diaper since I started part-time Elimination Communication with Eva. Doing it part-time really takes the pressure/stress out of it. I've been catching pee by putting her on the potty as soon as she wakes up from night or naps, if she is fussy, and just periodically throughout the day. She seems to understand what she is supposed to do now and she pees pretty quickly when I put her on. I think if I put her on when I have to go, I can increase the # of pee catches without much effort. I tried to do it when we were out by holding her over the toilet, but that didn't work very well. I set her on the edge, but I don't her bottom on a public toilet seat so I think we will stick to doing it at home for now and maybe get a travel potty for the car later.

Boy! I sure was wrong about EC. With the right attitude anyone can do it part-time. I need to do more reading and research, to refine our process, but with very little reading and research, we already have success.

EC Day#4

2009-10-19T02:24:00.000-07:00

For the past 3 days, I have put Eva on the potty when I picked up her signals. She nurses several times a night, but this morning, when she woke for her first nursing session of the morning, I put her on the potty and she peed for about 10 seconds. I caught a poop late morning before we went to pick Ian up at school.

Part-Time EC, I'm Going for It!

2009-10-18T04:42:00.000-07:00

I always though that Elimination Communication (EC) was too much work and not for me. However, since I haven't really had any problems with Eva (like breastfeeding issues or colic--let me knock on wood after typing that) and she often has very loud signals for when she needs to poop, like grunting, I have been thinking about trying EC with her for awhile. Before we moved, I did about half a day of experimentation which involved observing the patterns around when she goes. However, the moving process was crazy and stressful and long and caused regression in Ian's potty training, so I shelved EC.

A few nights ago after an e-mail to an expat mom who practices EC part-time, I got thinking about it again. Then, while in the bathtub with Eva, she started to grunt. Oh, no! Not in the tub! I jumped out and put her on the potty. I made a grunting sound and she pooped! Encouraged by that success and the fact that it doesn't have to be an "all or nothing" choice, I have decided to start trying to catch some poops and work with her on the potty.

Yesterday, I put her on (on the big potty with a potty insert) and Ian and I grunted for her and she put a woman-sized poop in the potty! Ian and I cheered for her. It is nice to have Ian help "teach" her.

Today, I her the signals but was busy so I missed the poop, but caught a pee.

Why do this?
Even if you do EC full-time, your child will probably not be completely independently potty trained until at least 18 months, but often later.

Why start early then?
Well, for every pee/poop you catch, you save a diaper from being used, which is better for the environment. Also, listening to and responding to a child's attempts to communicate their elimination needs, develops communication with your child. EC advocates talk about demonstrating respect for the child in this way so they are not sitting in waste. The child understands earlier what the potty is for and as long as your expectations are reasonable and there is no punishment or trauma involved, this can result in easier/earlier potty training. The Diaper Free Baby website has a long list of benefits and tips for getting started.

Eva is 7.5 months old and sits really well. She can sit on the potty by herself. I sit close with my hand on her leg so she doesn't jump off, but I don't have to hold her. Since she prefers to sit rather than crawl, she enjoys sitting on the potty. It is fun for Ian and I to encourage her. We are just going to start slowly. I will put her on the potty first thing in the morning, when I hear her signals and after eating. I will try to observe the times of day that she makes dirty diapers and maybe add potty time in if I can establish a pattern. I want to build up our commitment to EC because I don't want it to be stressful for either of us. Also, there are benefits to be reaped from occasional or part-time EC. Even though I potty training Ian was easy and gentle, even with the moving-related regression, I think Eva would really appreciate EC since she hates to be wet or dirty.

Anyone out there practice EC? How did it go for you?

Vaginal Breech Birth in Korea!

2009-10-13T00:27:00.000-07:00

One of the moms in the Expat Parents Club just had a baby boy here in Seoul on October 10 in a planned vaginal breech birth. She was attended by both a midwife and an OB. C-section averted! This was her second baby and all attempts to get the baby to turn, including ECV, failed. Awesome!

If you are pregnant in Korea and have a breech, you have options!

Baby Makin' Machine's March of Dimes Fundraiser/Giveaway

2009-10-11T17:32:00.000-07:00

Future Mama J at Baby Makin' Machine is having a fundraiser/giveaway for the March of Dimes. Click on over to contribute to a great cause. You'll be entered to win some fabulous prizes that were donated by her sponsors. Not only are the babies guaranteed to win through the March of Dimes' hard work and dedication, every donor will receive two floral baby headbands or a dogie bandana made by the Future Mama!

Another Sweater

2009-10-09T01:30:00.001-07:00

Fall!

2009-10-08T01:10:00.000-07:00

We've transitioned from shorts to pants, but it really isn't cool enough for jackets, sweaters and hats. That didn't stop me today.

Fire Fighters!

2009-10-08T00:59:00.001-07:00

It is Fire Safety Week and the Yongsan Firefighters visited the Preschool. The kids got to sit in the driver's seat and squirt the hose. Ian is obsessed with water guns, but he did not want to try the hose.

I Made Something, I Actually Made Something!

2009-10-04T00:59:00.000-07:00

My friend Chalica and I are pathetic because we both own sewing machines and do not know how to use them. (Chalica is less pathetic than I am because we both also own cameras, but she actually knows how to use hers). Our friend, Jenny, showed us a very simple project that inspired us to break out the old machines.

Baby Leg Warmers Out of Knee Socks

Koreans seem to have a sock obsession because you can buy socks on the street everywhere. It is probably because they take their shoes off inside and so need to be more stylish with their socks. In any case, you can buy adult knee socks in Itaewon for less than 2,000 won per pair without negotiating. They offered us 6 pair for 10,000 won.

Then, you snip the sock foot off at the ankle.

Cut off the toe.

Cut of the heel.

Take the remaining band between the toe and the heel and fold it in on itself.

Stitch to the tube of the sock.

Zig zag over original stitching to secure.

Done.

Here is another set of instructions with a slight variation.

Anyway, she brought her machine over yesterday and we both got one leg warmer done before we screwed up the threading of our machines and had to stop for the day. Today, I finished the second leg and now have one pair done! The sewing ain't pretty and in all probability will have to be re-done after washing or wearing a few times, but it works!

Little Stunt Woman

2009-10-02T22:26:00.000-07:00

Today, I put Eva on Ian's bed while I got her clothes out of the clothes (in the same room). In the time it took to pull a shirt off the hanger and reach into the drawer for a pair of pants, she had scooted herself to the edge of the bed and stood up! She pulled herself up on the bedrails that we have on there to keep Ian from falling out. I turned and saw her and before I could get to her, she smiled and bounced herself over the edge! She flipped over completely in the air and landed on her back.

This picture is of her napping after the fall. I made her stay awake for a long time afterwards just to be sure she was O.K. Then she fell asleep nursing in the chair. Lest you think that I've learned nothing from this incident, I just took her picture and then moved her to the floor.

Awake and Asleep

2009-09-23T02:56:00.000-07:00

At a Party

2009-09-17T01:22:00.000-07:00

We attended a birthday party yesterday and I will be posting more on the cake and decorations later. Happy Birthday, Alexandra!

A Taste of Lemon

2009-09-11T19:00:00.001-07:00

Despite the expression, she loved it.

6 Months Old and I've Already Doomed Her to Therapy!

2009-09-11T16:47:00.000-07:00

I did it again! At Eva's 6 month checkup, I was looking deep into her eyes and smiling. Then they gave her the shots. Her pupils instantly dilated and she started screaming. I think I traumatized her for life. She is going to associate pain with me. I did this before as well. I think next time, I won't look at her until after.

I really need to start filling in her baby book. Another reason for therapy as I put quite a bit into Ian's book. I even had it at his third birthday party because there is a page about third birthday in it. I'll have to look through the blog and Twitter for Eva's updates.

Eva is in the 38% for weight. She was in the 86% at the two month check up I think. She is hardly wasting away, in fact, she is chunkier than Ian, so I don't think anything is wrong with her. She weighs 7.2 kg (almost 16 lbs). I wonder if the fact that she chose her own birthday (unlike so many others, including Ian) had anything to do with her being at the top of the weight charts when she was younger.

She is vocalizing and spitting a lot. Besides pteradactyl noise, I've heard "hi", "mama", "dad", and "What are you people doing?" among other things. I don't count these as real words because she isn't associating them to people/objects or saying them in context, but that just gives you an idea about her vocal experimentation.